30,000 burnt letters
A cool breeze blew through Ponyville, sending straws of hay and the occasional piece of paper skittering through the dirt streets. It was a quiet fall morning in Ponyville, though the recent days had been filled with an underlying tension.
It was that year again, the time had come for the little ponies to elect the mayor. In the past, this had never really been much of an event, as Mayor Mare, the current mayor of Ponyville, had been elected, then won every election after that, for the past sixteen years.
However, this year had an odd feel about it. This year, another pony seemed to be running, very determined, to win the votes of the people. That pony, was Caramel.
In the past sixteen years nopony had ran against Mayor Mare, seemingly everyone in town had been just fine with the way she ran things. But odd enough, and seemingly out of the blue, Caramel rose to the occasion and announced his candidacy for the position.
And Mayor Mare was none too pleased with this fact.
“Outrageous!” Mayor Mare slammed her hoof down on her desk, rattling the framed picture of herself and other trinkets that sat upon the thick wood. “What gives him the illusion that he, a common pony, can run a whole town!?” The Mayor was seething with anger at hearing the news of a challenge for her position. She took a deep breath and steadied herself. “No matter. The ponies of Ponyville will see that he’s incapable of running this town. Leave me, Notepad.”
With that, Notepad, the mayor's secretary, bowed and left the office.
The Mayor watched the door close, waiting to hear it click shut, then turned to face her head of security. He was no pony. He stood on two cloven hooves, his thick muscular legs were covered in deep blue, course, fur up to his waist. His torso was a slightly paled shade of blue, but bare of any fur. He was muscular in every sense of the word. Thick slabs of muscle and visceral made up his body. His pinpoint pupils seemed to poke out of his two yellow eyes that sat in the sockets of a bulls head. He was an odd beast, and an uncommon one in Equestria. He was Iron Will the Minotaur.
“Will.” Mayor Mare deadpanned.
Iron Will simply snorted, his nose ring, the same shade of silver as his horns, flapped lightly from the forceful exhale.
“I want you to make this problem go away, immediately. How you do it I don’t care, just make sure he’s gone and it doesn’t lead back to myself. Understood?”
Iron will changed his pose in the blink of an eye, flexing his thick arms and back, his muscles rippling with power. “Iron Will is on it!” His voiced boomed. He resumed his stoic pose once more, then walked from the mayor's office.
Mayor Mare looked at the clock on the wall. “Hopefully he’s dead by dinner.” She said sotto voce.
Author's Note
Buckle up boys and girls
Caramel waved to Mrs. Cake as he passed Sugarcube Corner. He was on his way to Sweet Apple Acres to see his dear friend Big Mac. He always enjoyed the quality time they spent with one another.
He took a deep breath, letting the cold autumn air bight at his snout. He always loved the way the leaves change colors this time of year. He looked forward to enjoying this same thing next year, except he’d surely be mayor by then. And things would be different. Things would be better.
Caramels train of thought was interrupted when a mare screamed to his left. His head snapped in the same direction to see a small herd of angry looking goats charging straight for him.
He had no time to get out of the way. He could only throw his hooves over his heads in a vain attempt to protect himself from being trampled. Though his eyes were closed he could hear the thunder of their hooves, they were mere feet away now. Looks like his ambitions were not going to come to fruition.
Suddenly the air was filled with the booms of thunder, as if the skies had thought to smite the town from existence. Caramel flinched with every earth-shaking explosion as they shook him to his core.
Suddenly it was over, stopping nearly as quickly as it had started. Caramel uncovered his eyes to see the herd of goats now crumpled up on the ground, a pool of blood seeping from under them. Caramel stood on shaking legs, glancing back behind himself to see his saviour, and his bodyguard for that matter.
“Damn, I’m good.” The pony spoke with a low and rough voice, speaking around a smoldering cigar held tight in his jaws.. His coat was a vibrant blonde. His mane was cut flat and squared on the top of his head. He was of a thicker build than most stallions, and stood half a head taller than Caramel. His cutie mark was a black dot with three black rectangles surrounding it, evenly spaced apart. Only his grin showed his satisfaction with his work, as his eyes were hidden behind his sunglasses. He was Buck Fuckem™.
“Th-thanks Buck.” Caramel managed to stammer out, though the haunted look in his eyes didn’t do much to convince Buck he was alright. He was in shock. He knew this wasn’t a one-in-a-million occurrence. He knew those goats were after him because he was running for mayor. He also knew that this attack was carried out on the orders of Mayor Mare. He’d always known she was a no-good politician, but now his suspicions were confirmed.
Caramel was broken from his thoughts as he noticed the throng of ponies gathering, jaws agape at the scene before them.
“Sir, “ Buck Fuckem™ was standing at Caramels side. “We should leave, the authorities will handle this.” And he was right, the detachment of Royal Guard at Princess Twilight's Castle would no doubt be here soon.
But Caramel needed to take care of one thing first. “Indeed Buck, but let us take advantage of the situation shall we?” Caramel took a deep breath, expelling the last traces of fear and shock he still possessed, then cleared his throat. “Ponies! Witness what has happened here today!” He shouted, gathering the attention of the crowd. “Goat on pony violence is at a record high! And who allows these goats to live here with us, undocumented and unchecked? None other than Mayor Mare herself! She puts you, the kind ponies of Ponyville at risk for cheap labor! Now, I don’t know about you all, but I for one can’t stand for that. I would never put my ponies in danger and outsource pony jobs. I hope you all will remember this when you go to the polls, and I trust you will all make the right decision in choosing Ponyvilles future!” The crowd managed to cheer despite the gory scene before them. Caramel waved to the crowd as the Royal Guard arrived at the scene.
Caramel insisted that himself and Buck Fuckem™ stay to explain to the guards what had happened. Though he ran through the events with the guards, the only thing going through his mind was how he would use this event to gain more of a following for the election.
