The Beast Inside

by Lord_Evil

Rating: mature
Tags: Violence, Human, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Death, Other, Original Character, Suicide / Self Harm, Tragedy, Horror
Length: 3186

There is a monster inside of all of us. Mine just happens to have a mind of its own.

A creature from another world is looking to save his soul from a dark, horrific creature lurking deep inside of his very being. However, the more he fights, the stronger it gets. Every move he's made was a mistake, every light in his life has already been snuffed out by the beast inside. How much longer can he keep fighting before he finally breaks and gives in? With nowhere left to turn, he ventures out in search of a way that neither he, nor the creature living within him, can hurt anyone EVER again.

Published 2019-10-02 03:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2019-10-02 03:20:02 UTC

Prologue: A story to tell

Author's Note

I really shouldn't be doing this. I barely have time for my other stories as is. But, I wanted to do something special for the beginning of October. It's been a long time since I've worked on anything horror-related. I'm pretty sure I deleted almost every horror story I've written because it just didn't fit with the writing style I've grown accustomed to recently.
Anyway, I've been tinkering with this idea for a while now. It's kind of a re-imagining of an older story (That I deleted) called Animal (Which was fucking terrible)
To those who did read it, this will be virtually nothing like that story as I've chosen to go a different route and have drastically changed the scenario. The only thing I'm really holding onto with it is the way the story progressed and the conflicts that the character faced as time went by.
So to those that read Animal, I've just spoiled a good portion of how the story will go. And, to those smart enough, how it will end.
Enjoy!

Prologue: A story to tell

I didn't think much of it at first. I thought it was normal. No one else ever brought it up, so I never saw any reason to either. It didn't start out how you would expect it to. It wasn't sudden, it wasn't uncontrollable. In fact, it was surprisingly easy to deal with...at first...I was so naive; thinking that I could keep it contained forever, thinking that this was something that everyone was going through. How wrong I was...I didn't realize until I was about twelve that there was something wrong, so wrong, with me.

There was always this feeling I had, deep in the pit of my stomach. I didn't realize what it was or what it meant. There was this strange craving that just never went away no matter what I did. When it first started to set in, it just seemed like I was always hungry. But, I could stuff my face all day and the feeling would still be there. No matter how much I ate or how full I was, that craving remained. For a while, I figured it was something I'd just have to get used to. Then there was that voice...It started off as a whisper, but it told me what it was it wanted. I remember the dread I felt when it said...

I don't know what this thing is. I don't even know how far back it goes and I couldn't trace it if I tried. Why? I was abandoned, that's why. Left out in the middle of the woods, probably to die. My dad told me that I couldn't have been more than a few weeks old when they found me there the next morning...It kind of makes you think, doesn't it?

No?

Think about it; I wasn't old enough to even crawl and yet I was just tossed out like a foam cup on the side of a highway. What reason did my parents have to just leave me there? Did they know what was going to happen? Was there some kind of sign, something that told them so early on that I was bound to turn into this thing? I can't help but to theorize about it. You know, try to create some kind of answers to all these questions. The problem there is that they're simply that; theories. I don't know for sure what drove them to leave me like that and I don't think I'll ever figure it out. Especially now that I'm here.

Hmm?

My dad? Yeah, he wasn't my real dad. But, he was the closest thing I had to one. He was a priest and he was hosting a bible camp nearby. I guess I was left in one of their scouting areas or something. They had a regular routine of checking out that area since it was close to the nearest source of water. Being a god-fearing man, he took me in and raised me as his own. He used to tell me that it was his christian duty to help those in need, but it became his duty as a father to make sure I lived a long, happy life full of love and faith. He kept to his word; Prayer in the morning, attend mass every day, three full meals, more prayer. We prayed at least four times a day. I was at every sermon, every congregation. He took me around town. We visited the ill in hospitals, went to some of the public schools to educate the youth. We finished off every day with one final prayer, where we would ask for protection of those in our company. After that he would take me to my room and tuck me in. He would tell me he loved me and then leave for his room. Once he was gone, I would pray one last time before turning in for the night, asking God to watch over my father and keep him safe. The next morning, we would do it all again...together.

I wish I could take it all back, you know? Turn back the clock and stop myself from doing those horrible things. He didn't deserve it. He was my everything; My father, my protector, my faith. Without him, I would have been nothing. I am nothing... I hurt a lot of people that day, not just him. My dad, the nuns that helped raise me, the alter boy, Syle, who was like a brother to me...I did so many terrible things. Then what did I do? I ran. I ran away like the coward I am, desperately trying to convince myself that it wasn't my fault. That it was this...thing...inside of me that did it. I should have fought harder. I should have ran away before I could hurt them...I should have killed myself when I had the chance...

I just...I miss him...I miss them all...

No...No, I'm fine. We can keep going.

That's a good question...To be honest, I'm not sure how I ended up here. I remember being back in those woods. I hadn't been there since my dad took me to the church with him the day he found me, but I knew how to get there. It was like the area itself was calling out to me, or holding my hand and leading me there. I'm not sure how else to explain it. I made those woods my home, trying to drown out the memories of what I'd done by forcing my survival instincts to kick in. It never worked. That craving, that damned voice...They were always there to remind me of my failure to protect my loved ones...About a month ago is when I found myself here. I was looking around in a cave for something to eat. I was desperate and starving. There was this...hole...in the ground. I don't know how it got there, but it was so deep. I couldn't see to the bottom. I did even hear the rock I threw in there hit the bottom.

It all came at me at once as I stared down into that abyss of a hole. Everything I had done, flashing before my eyes. I felt...I don't know what I felt. I couldn't take it anymore. I was raised to face my problems, not to run away from them. But, how can I face the problem when I am the problem? When this thing inside of me is the problem. It was so...overwhelmingly painful. I cried...I cried like a little baby as it all played out in my head. I finally realized what I had to do. There was no redeeming my actions, no defending the monster. I had to make things right. I was an abomination...I still am...I got down on my knees, right in front of that hole, and I prayed for the last time. Tears streaming down my face, I asked God how he could let this happen. I told him that they didn't deserve it. I told him that if he can't even protect those who are loyal to him then what good is he. I told him that I hated him!

I asked him if he was even real...

Just as every other time I prayed, I received no response. Feeling completely helpless and alone, I looked down into that hole. I leaned forward. Then I fell, letting myself go as I plummeted head-first into its depths. The weightlessness I felt as I was falling was unlike anything I had ever experienced. It didn't even feel like I was falling. It was like I was hovering in the sky with the wind blowing through my hair, wrapping me in it's soft, cool embrace, ready to accept my sacrifice. For the first time in weeks, I felt at peace. I knew I was doing the right thing. I waited and I waited for the end to come. After a while, everything went completely dark. My senses were shut down. I remember thinking to myself, 'Is this it? Is this the afterlife? Is this what death is; a void of nothingness, the dark emptiness of nonexistence? Is this hell?'

It seemed that my prayers went unnoticed once again.

Everything was black, but something was happening. I started hearing things. Other voices. I didn't recognize them. I can't remember what they were saying. I was too shocked by what followed to register it. I couldn't see anything, but I could hear those voices screaming, pleading. The sound of...the sounds of them being torn apart. That I can remember. It was sickening, but that other part of me, the monster, was relishing in it. I must have tuned it out or something, because I stopped hearing anything for a while after that. I don't know what happened in that time. It felt like I was sleeping. And when I finally woke up, I couldn't believe my eyes.

I was laying out in a field, the long grass brushing against my skin as the wind pushed the little grains of life to my resting body. I pushed myself up and looked around at the wide open area, trying to take it all in. I could hear running water behind me, a stream that flowed naturally. The bright blue sky above my head was nothing new, but it looked so different. The grass, the flowers, the sky, the sun hitting my face. I was falling into a seemingly endless pit just a moment ago. I was supposed to be dead. And yet, there I stood, breathing in the crisp, clean morning air as it glided across my form. I cursed myself for questioning my faith there as I took it all in. This place was so...beautiful; So pure and full of life. The colors were so much brighter and more...I don't know. Alive?

I thought to myself, 'Have I been forgiven? Is this heaven? It has to be. I've never seen a place so magnificent.'

My little delusion didn't last very long. Something odd caught my attention. A sound so disturbing I was almost too scared to look back. I did...but how I wish I hadn't. Behind me, right beside a small stream, a pile of...I don't know. I don't know what they were. They looked like over-grown dogs and they...they were...oh god...one of them was still alive!

Lilac looked up from her notepad as he stopped speaking, his words now being replaced by quiet sobs. The mare's eyes dared to wander over to the creature she had been questioning for some time now. It was hard to make out his form in such a dimly lit room. If she were to leave her spot at the small, metal table, she could move closer to get a better look at him. However, she had been given explicit orders to keep her distance. As if she'd even want to get any closer to that thing. The smell alone would have been enough to keep her on the far side of the small room. Not to mention, the few times she had moved from her spot to stretch her legs just today, the cold that followed would become nearly unbearable. She was already forced into wearing a winter coat over top of her light purple body just from being in the same room as it.

Brushing a strand of her silver mane from her eyes, she set the quill she was holding her magical grasp into the ink bottle on the side of the table. Raising her front hooves, Lilac rubbed her eyes. She wasn't tired, having only been here for a few short hours this time around, but rather she was trying to rub some of the frost from her lashes. After clearing as much of her lashes as she could, the mare set her hooves down on the table and focused back on the creature.

The self-proclaimed 'man' on the other side of the room was nothing more than a silhouette from her current position. However, she could make out his position. He appeared to be huddled up into a ball, his long thin arms holding his equally elongated hind legs to his chest. His head was lowered toward his knees and his palms seemed to be covering his face. She could just barely make out his slender fingers resting on his scalp, slightly blocked off by the rather large...protrusions on his head. They seemed to have grown since their last meeting.

Letting out a hot breath that turned to fog in front of her face from the cold of the room, Lilac held her stoic expression and professional demeanor as she addressed him by name. "Mr. Arius..." She watched silently for a moment, waiting for a response. Said response came in the form of Arius lifting his head from his hands and leaning his back against the wall as he looked up at her. The chains around his wrist, holding him to the back wall, rattled slightly as he lowered his arms to the floor. There was a few seconds of hesitation on Lilac's part as the 'protrusions' she noted earlier nearly scraped the ceiling just from him sitting up. "I-I understand this is...difficult for you. But, we must continue."

Arius let took a deep breath, letting it out similar to how Lilac had not too long ago. Unlike her though, there was no fog as a result of his breathing. "I...Understand..." He said in a rough, raspy tone. "It's just...it hurts to think about."

Having heard a fair amount of this creature's story over the last few days, she could kind of get what he was saying. Despite his appearance, he hardly came off as something harmful. However, after all that she had heard in her time talking with Arius, she knew that was not the case. Of course, that wasn't due to his own wishes. She could tell he never wanted to hurt anypony. "I can't even imagine what you're going through, Mr. Arius. If I were in your position, I would have gone mad long ago."

"Who knows...Maybe I am..." Even through his cold, broken tone, Lilac could hear the pain in his voice. "I'm not sure what else to say, Miss. Lilac. There is no fixing what I've done. No changing what I've become." His neck popped loudly as he turned his head to the side, staring at the wall a few feet from him. "Just put me out of my misery...Don't let me hurt anyone else..."

Lilac stared at Arius with sad eyes. It must be terrible going through what he had, and still is forced to endure. It broke her heart to see something try so hard and then fail, just to give up on it all. "Princess Twilight is doing everything she can to help you, Mr. Arius." She said, hoping to keep his spirits up. "Don't give up hope just yet."

"Too late..."

Silence; Painful, cold silence. Lilac could only stand it for so long before she jumped to the first thing she could to get him talking again. "How about we jump ahead a little bit, hmm?" She suggested, levitating he quill from the ink bottle and giving it a quick shake before placing the tip to her notepad. "Let's go right to the first pony you met. I believe her name was-"

"Autumn Blaze..." Arius' neck popped again as he turned his head forward, leaning it back so he could look up at the blank ceiling. He could picture her clear as day in his head, he could see her face in the stone surface above him. The image brought a smile to his face. "She was such a lovely mare. I remember how she used to look at me. Her eyes were like clovers in the rain, green and glimmering. Her peach coat and flowing amber mane was smooth to the touch. Her smell..." He paused, taking a deep inhale through his nose, savoring the non-existent scent of his friend. "like Fall...when the leaves would change and break free from their branches, raining down on the ground below. As if coming out of their homes for the first time to grace the earth with their presence."

This got a smile out of Lilac as she began jotting down his words into her notes, "You sure do have a way with words, Mr. Arius." After putting his words on paper, she turned her attention back to the creature, still holding on to her smile. "You really cared about her didn't you?"

"I did..."

Nodding, Lilac readied her pen. "How about you tell me how you two met then we can continue from there."

There was another brief pause before Arius began speaking once again, "It was a few days after I began wandering through the fields. I was trying to find something, anything that could tell me where I was. For a while, I thought I'd just continue to be lost. It was on the third day of my being lost, after spending hours upon hours of searching, I found myself wandering into a fairly wooded area. I couldn't help but note how even the trees seemed more alive than the ones where I'm from. Several more hours passed with me aimlessly walking in no particular direction. Then I heard..."

Lilac looked up from her notes as Arius fell silent. She could already guess what he was referring to. "The voice, right? The one that tells you to do bad things?" The creature nodded and she wrote down the confirmation in her notes. "What did it say?"

"...Feed..."

Knowing all too well what that meant sent a shiver through every inch of Lilac's body. However, it did little to deter her from getting every little bit of information she could from him. "And after that?"

"After that..." Arius felt a sense of dread and nostalgia wash over him as he recalled the moment he laid eyes on the mare. "That's when I saw her..."