What's going on?
What is this?
Who are you?
Who are they?
...
"Who am I..?"
__-__-__-__
"I've always had memory problems. Or.. At least I think I have...
I can't exactly remember."
"I believe I stayed laying upon the grassy hill for for about an hour."
What am I even...?
I visibly cringed.
My face scrunched up for a second as I try in vein to keep the "bad thoughts" at bay.
"Do you know where you are?" Asked the psychiatrist, his voice caring, almost affectionate. Like a fathers.
"no.. Erm.. Yes, and no."
"Would you.. care to explain?"
I looked at him from the corner of my eye. My face returning to its usual expressionless state.
His clean glasses sat on his muzzle as he stared at me, a look of patience in his eyes, along with.. something else that adorned in the faint glint that shimmered in the sunlight.
"Tell me, Doctor~"
"~Please, call me by my first name."
He's amused.
I smiled at that and tried a second time. Chuckling slightly.
"Tell me, Sunny. Do you...have any kids?"
His gaze turned to the floor as his face took on warmth when he recalled fond memories.
"Two, Lilly and Leafy Montgomery. They both turned 4 this week."
Now, I love the Scottish accent. Over the British. To me, I prefer sounding complicated, interesting and strong, than proper, organized and understanding. Not to say that I prefer one over the other as a person. I was actually happily married to a British woman, we had the cutest child together.
I listened to the voice before responding. I never could think with another speaking.
My frown returns yet again.
"Hmh..."
After a second of silence, he broke it with a question.
"What's on your mind?"
"I just remembered something. A pretty important fact that meant -- means -- a lot to me."
"And what was that?"
"I had a kid."
Shawn scribbled furiously at his notepad. Then stopped, looking at me warily and questioningly, almost as if he were fearing my answer.
"H-had, you say?"
"She's grown up, now." Shawn audibly sighed in relief.
"Majors in particle physics, math was always her strong point. Her name, Sylvia."
Now, it was my turn to smile.
"The happiest memory I can recall is when she was first born unto the world. Her cries as she was birthed were none as she was deafeningly silent.. It was almost worrisome. Then I seen her face."
Tears rolled down my cheeks as I recalled the memories through unforgettable joy.
"The look in her eyes wasn't that of hurt, anger or fear -- it was of innocent curiosity and understanding." I continued.
"She didn't blame the world for the pains of being brought into it, she never fought. cried 'nor kicked."
I continued on as Sunny stared at the wall in front of him, tears threatening to stain the fur on his face.
"The first time I held her... She smiled so brightly the room seemed to be further illuminated."
I laughed to myself nervously, not wanting to continue from that point. My face took on a heavy frown. Shawn seemed to notice as he looked back at me. I have his undivided attention.
"But... She....was gone."
I sobbed into my hands, but continued on. Sunny levitated some tissues, of which I took gratefully. Using but a moment to gather my thoughts.
"I was too distracted to notice, but her mother -- my wife -- had passed. The heart rate monitor had had a steady hum, signifying that she was no longer with us."
One of the Doctors in a light blue suit gently grasped my shoulder, looked at me sadly and nodded without word. My heart fell to my feet as I stared into her whitening body. With each blink of my eyes my vision became more and more blurry as tears fell from my cheeks to the blankets now covering my peacefully sleeping daughter. I dropped to my knees as the others covered her up in a blanket nearby.
You were supposed to stay...
I held my daughter closer to me. Not wanting to let her go. Wordlessly agreeing to myself that I would protect her with my life -- my very soul -- if necessary.
The smile grew on her face as she snuggled closer into the warmth of my arms.
I thought silently to myself while driving her to her home. Our home. Unable to keep myself from crying.
I have lost so much, but in my moment of despair, it had become known that I had gained so much more.
...
It was quiet, now.
I stood and walked to the window watching lightning crackle and flash across the sky. Others running into their homes in a desperate and vain attempt to keep from getting soaked.
Looks like I'm going to be needing my umbrella, now.
"Well, Docto... Sunny. I think it's about time I head home."
Sunny's frown deepened as he thought over his next words carefully. Seemingly knocking him out of his stupor.
"Would you like to schedule another day, soon, I hope?"
Nice one, Doc. Nice.
I looked over at him whilst he sat at my side, and scratched his ear.
"How does 4 days time sound?"
He looked impossibly deeper in concentration a second before answering.
"No, I take Mondays off... Would Tuesday be alright?"
Aw... He didn't notice.
"Even better."
I started towards the door.
"May I ask you another question?" Asked Sunny.
I turned to look at him and nodded.
"Anything."
"Your wife... Before she passed.."
He paused, hesitant. "Did you two love each other?"