When Zest and Zap Killed Principal Cinch

by Shadowsnake89

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, Human, Shadowbolts (EqG), Lemon Zest, Comedy, Equestria Girls, Indigo Zap
Length: 2126

Lemon Zest and Indigo have a boring day at school and decided to mix them up. But their kind of fun usually comes with some sort of horrible unintentional twist.

A regular day at Crystal Prep is shaken up as Lemon Zest and Indigo Zap get bored during their free period. Zest's idea to relieve that? A wacky little unauthorized project in the science lab. Things take a turn for the worse when the project vaporizes the head of the school. Now the two have to prevent anyone else from finding out about it long enough for them to get rid of any evidence. Question is, who'll crack first?

It's a parody of one of my favorite episodes of Spongebob.

Rated T for a few lightly suggestive jokes.

Published 2016-09-07 03:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-09-07 03:10:01 UTC

It Was All Her Idea

Ah, a dark and stormy night near Crystal Prep academy. It's nights like this that remind me of the time Indigo Zap and Lemon Zest thought they'd killed Principal Cinch. It was a bright and sunny day...

“Bleh, I'm so bored.” Indigo declared as she rocked back and forth in her chair during her free period in the library as Lemon Zest sat right across from her, listening to her tunes as she attempted to balance a pencil on her nose.

“You wanna sneak into the cafeteria and grab a snack?”

“Nah.”

“You wanna go to the arcade?”

“Nope.”

“You wanna go to my secret hiding spot and peep on the boys in the locker room?”

“Na...wait what?”

“Nothing,” Zest fell from the chair before coming up with another idea. “I just thought of something wi..wi..wicked! Twilight and me did some sick chemical mixing in the science lab for a propulsion system. Ms. Gingersnaps isn't in today so there's no one in the lab and I know where she hides the keys in the teachers lounge.”

“I don't know. Would we really have time to do anything before next class hour?”

“Easy. All the teachers keep there absent slips in the lounge. I just get one for each of us, make up an excuse and we're good for the rest of the day.”

“Eh, why not. Didn't have anything better to do anyway.”

“Righteous, let's move.” The duo tiptoed quietly down the hall and passed the Principal's office, making sure to obey the “Do not Disturb” sign out of fear of getting caught by who they perceived as the harshest disciplinarian they had ever encountered. After making all the necessary arrangements they soon had the entire lab to themselves as Zest went about grabbing all they'd need to duplicate Twilight's formula. “Here we are. And the model rocket we we're going to test it in.”

“Alright so what next?”

“I'll read off the instructions and you can mix up the formula. That sound cool?”

“Yep.” The two went about the process as Zest read off the instructions and Zap poured two separate concoctions into individual tanks on the rocket. As she did smoke began to emit from the bottom and it began to shake. “Uh Zest, is this supposed to happen?”

Lemon looked up to see what was happening and quickly went over the instructions. “Ah, here we are. Before you add the mixture, ensure both tank induction valves are closed as failure to do so could result in premature propulsion. Uh-oh. Hit the deck!” Zap swiftly released the rocket as it shot across the room, violently bouncing off the walls. Fortunately for the two the room was sound proofed so any banging wouldn't be heard in the other classes. On the other hand if anything happened no one would know to even look for them until it was too late. “Well it's been fun but I really should be going.” the rocker girl made her exit as she quickly opened the door to escape.

“Real nice.” Zap said sarcastically as she watched Zest immediately run to Cinch's office down the hall and lightly tapped on the door and spoke in a whisper.

“Principal Cinch, Principal Cinch. We've got a bit of an emergency.” when her whispered voice yielded no results she decided to bite the bullet and enter, cracking the door to peer in only for the out of control projectile to soar in a fraction of a second later. She immediately shut the door on reflex as Zap ran down the hall to join her. The two cringed as they bit their nails.

“Maybe Cinch won't be too mad if we tell her it was for some kind of contest. Then we can all have a good laugh about it, right?” Zest suggested as Zap moved her aside and hesitantly opened the door.

“There are two problems with that. First I don't think she's even capable of laughing and second even if she was she couldn't.”

“Why not?”

“Because that rocket killed her!” She swung the door open to reveal the entire office a mess from the rocket which had exploded. Important files and Cinch's personal effects were strewn across the room as the two entered, shutting the door behind them. They scanned every inch of the large office as Zest and Zap to their horror saw the clothing of the esteemed faculty member strewn across the floor, the rest of her seemingly having been obliterated to nothing.

In a panic, Zest grabbed Indigo Zap by the shoulders. “What are we gonna do?”

“What's all this 'we' stuff?” the blue-haired athlete pushed her friend away to arms length. “It was your idea to make the rocket. Looks like it's the end of the line for you.”

“But you said you were bored.”

“Well you could have made me read a book or something.”

Zest's eyes widen with the forced realization then began to droll on nonsensically. “You're right. I'm guilty. When a friend of mine get's bored I come up with ideas. When I come up with ideas, I make bad decisions. When I make bad decisions, things go wrong. When things go wrong, a tragedy occurs. When a tragedy occurs, the police get involved. And when the police get involved, you end up sharing a cell with a woman named Heavy Betty.” She promptly groveled at Zap's feet as she cried. “Don't make me share a cell with Heavy Betty. I'm too pretty to be a bed warmer.”

Zap picked her up from the floor and shook her to silence. “Will you get a hold of yourself. No one can ever know about this. It'll be the end of you, it'll be the end of me and worst of all, it'll be the end of me. Now we need to clean up this mess and act like none of this ever happened. As long as that sign stays on the door no one will dare come in here, at least for a while. That should give us plenty of time.”

The two set about the process of getting cleaning materials from the janitor's closet and changed into the yellow jumpsuits necessary for the task. They also tied their hair under caps and put bandannas over their mouths to better conceal their identities. As they made their way back to the office the bell rang for the next class to begin as the students passed them. Approaching the office the duo noticed Pepper Twist about to knock on the door. Zap rushed forward and put herself between the bespectacled young man and the door. “Hey, can't you read? It says do not disturb.”

“But I really need to speak with the Principal.”

“You got butt in your ears kid? She is not seeing anyone today. We're lucky she's even letting us in there to clean. Now run along. I'm sure whatever it is can wait til tomorrow.” Pepper quickly retreated toward his next class as the two carried on. Just as they were about to enter the room a voice came from behind that filled them with dread.

“Can I help you?” The voice came from Dean Cadence who stood not far behind them.

“I don't want to go to prison!” Zest blurted out only for Zap to slap her in the back of the head.

“Sorry ma'am,” Zap said in a gruff voice in the hopes that the disguises would fool her. “He has flashbacks from the war. Not a good idea to surprise him. We're...part of the new janitorial staff.”

“Oh, I hadn't heard about that,” Cadence said with her usual bright smile. “Are you covering for Mr. Hayseed?”

“Yes ma'am. I'm...Bucket Chucker and this is uh...Wax On. Principal Cinch actually called us down to take care of some sort of mess in her office while she's out for the moment.”

“Alright, well it's a pleasure to meet you both. When she get's back in would you inform the principal that I need to speak with her?”

“Of course.” the two said as they waved her goodbye before promptly setting up orange cones outside and heading in. For the next hour or so they worked tirelessly to clean and make it look as if there had never been a death rocket that flew in and wiped the head of the school from the face of the earth. “Finally all done. Now let's ditch these uniforms and hope no one is the wiser.”

“Mr. Chucker, I'm glad I caught you.” an orange haired man said coming up the stairwell. “Coach Rommel, Crystal Prep athletic director. We have a bit of a situation in the locker room.” He shook the disguised Zap's hand as he led her and Zest to the locker room. “Right through here gentlemen.” As the door opened the two froze in place at what awaited them.

Two Hours Later

Zap was curled up in a ball as Lemon comforted her in the janitor's closet. “There there, it's all over now.”

“That was the most vile thing I have ever had to see.”

“Meh, you get used to it. Look on the bright side, we're in the clear.”

Indigo began to perk up as she stood. “You're right. Let's ditch these get ups and we'll be home free. What's the worst that could happen now?” As they exited the closet they bumped into Twilight, Sour Sweet, Sugarcoat and Sunny Flare who were on their free period and headed for the computer room. The sudden collision caused there identities to be exposed as the bandannas came undone and their hats hit the ground.

“There's a very interesting and disturbing story as to why you two are dressed like that, I'm sure.” Flare said as the two got up quickly before glancing at each other.

“Alright, I confess,” Indigo spoke up first. “Lemon Zest killed her.”

“What?” Zest immediately objected to being thrown under the bus for her part. “You can't pin this whole thing on me!”

“She's a rocker. Anti-establishment. She was bound to go after the only authority figure in her life sooner or later.”

“It was her idea to get rid of the evidence instead of coming clean.”

“Call the cops before she gets us all too.”

“She has body pillows of all of us under her bed!”

“Wait, it's not what you think!”

The other girls traded concerned and confused looks before Sugarcoat removed her glasses and massaged the bridge of her nose before she spoke. “What are you two talking about?”

Zap and Zest groveled at her feet in a panic as the former told her everything. “We killed Principal Cinch! Fired a rocket into her office and disintegrated her right in her chair!”

“Wait my rocket for the test?” Twilight said in angry disbelief as Zest smiled nervously as Sugarcoat rolled her eyes and pointed down the hall.

“You mean that Principal Cinch?” The group looked down the hall as they saw the head of the school, dressed in very casual attire walking toward them. The two girls quickly got up and ran toward her, wrapping her in a huge hug.

“Principal Cinch, you're alive!”

“Well of course I am.” She pried the two off of her. “What is going on here?”

“Um, Principal Cinch,” Twilight began shyly as she stepped forward. “Not to question you but why are you wearing...that?”

“If you must know, I was spending my yearly one day vacation at the Seven Stars theme park.”

“Wait, you only take one day off a year?” Twilight asked.

“Of course. Do you honestly think this school could run as efficiently as it does if I wasn't around? Why do you think I put the sign on my office door. If anyone knew I wasn't here the entire school would fall overnight. I trust you girls will keep this all hush-hush?”

“Of course ma'am.” Zap and Zest agreed as they stood at attention.

“Well then.” Cinch gave a slight nod as a thanks as she headed to her office.

“It seems fate has given us a second chance,” Zap said as they watched the principal walk off. “and I for one will make sure to use it to it's fullest.”

“And you know what else?” Lemon Zest interrupts. “Betty ain't getting her hands on this.” she pointed to her butt and began swaying it in a dance as Indigo joined in her celebration.

“Ugh, you two are so weird.” Sugarcoat declared as she turned her gaze from the two as they continued their embarrassing dance. As the others stood for a moment Sour Sweet's eyes opened wide as she finally picked up on Lemon's earlier accusation.

“Wait, a what pillow?!”