Love, Trust and Friendship

After the night she'd had, Twilight decided to pass the morning in the quiet of her library, getting her things ready for her next project. Usually Spike would help her with the preparations, wearing out his claws writing checklists, but Twilight felt the need for some quiet time to herself. Collecting quills, sorting inkwells, stacking parchment and organizing her books seemed to effectively occupy her mind while she processed the events of the night before.

She had just finished stacking the first twelve thick, leather-bound books on the table beside her desk when a quiet knock sounded at the door.

"Yes?" Twilight asked, without looking away from the shelves as she used her magic to pull out another volume.

Spike poked his head in the door. "Hey Twilight, I know you said not to disturb you..."

Twilight rolled her eyes, dropping the thirteenth book onto the stack. "But?" she asked.

"Uhhh... Rainbow Dash is here..." Spike said, looking just a little awkward.

Twilight blinked wide eyes. "Oh," she said. She knew Rainbow was likely to show up, but now that she was here, Twilight was completely unsure of what to do with the information. And somehow, Spike had found out what had happened the night before. He hadn't said anything, but Twilight noticed a distinct lack of teasing from his typical demeanor.

"Want me to get rid of her?" Spike asked puffing up his chest, giving his best brave face.

Twilight laughed. Spikes display helped to clear the fog of indecision out for her head. "No Spike! I'm pretty sure she's just here to talk," she said as she trotted past him out the library door.

Spike fell into step behind her. "She's in the throne room," he said. "I'll make myself scarce. I want nothing to do with your mushy business," he said sarcastically.

"Thank you Spike," Twilight said giving the little dragon a warm smile.

Spike broke off and headed towards the general area of the kitchen.

Twilight trotted alone towards the throne room, stopping outside the door. The familiar anxiety was creeping back, and she could feel her shoulders tightening. Come on, you know she's not here to freak out. She's probably just here to apologize. Like Rarity said, you need to work this out on your own.

But what if she's not? What if she's here to profess her feelings again!

Well, you're not interested in her, so it's not a big-

What if she wants you to leave Rarity and won't take no for an ans-

STOP ARGUING WITH YOURSELF!

Twilight shook her head and took a deep breath, trying to clear her mind and slow her quickly beating heart. She closed her eyes, counting slowly to five, and pushed open the door with her magic.

Rainbow Dash was indeed seated at the table, but Twilight thought she looked a little worse for wear. Rainbow sat with her head hung and the dark circles under her eyes, her mane slightly disheveled. Twilight felt an unexpected flutter of sympathy for her friend.

"Hey Rainbow Dash," Twilight said uneasily as she trotted up to her seat. So many times they had sat in this room, so many happy times as they made memories together. Now it felt... strained. I don't want to do this, she thought. I want to go back to my library and snuggle with Rarity in front of the fire...

"Hey, Twilight," Rainbow said quietly, her voice sounding hoarse.

"You OK?" Twilight asked, concern coloring her tone.

Rainbow let out a single harsh "Ha!" shaking her head, a small bitter smile touching her lips. "No... Not really, but I think I owe you an apology anyway."

"Rainbow..." Twilight started. She wasn't sure what to say. Things were not progressing as she had hoped. And we've barely said anything, she thought anxiously.

Rainbow sighed. "Sorry about that... Its been a rough morning."

"Rough night to I suspect," Twilight said sitting down next to Rainbow.

"Yeah... S'why I'm here... But you figured that." Rainbow said flicking her gaze at Twilight.

Twilight chuckled. "It was my first guess."

"Look..." Rainbow started. "I'm really sorry about what happened last night. I haven't... been myself lately. It's not an excuse, just an explanation."

Twilight smiled. Finally things were on track. "I accept your apology Rainbow Dash," she said with a bit more formality than she intended.

Rainbow Dash looked up, meeting Twilight's gaze. "Really? Just like that?"

Twilight looked at her friend's tired eyes saying, "Yes. Just like that."

"Wow, thanks-" Rainbow started.

Twilight interrupted, "But we still have to talk about it... if I understand this stuff correctly. Which I don't, but we'll figure it out."

Rainbow groaned, leaning back in her seat. "I'm not very good at this kind of thing..." she said.

Twilight laughed. "Don't worry, I'm not good at it either. I'm the Princess of Friendship Rainbow Dash, not the Princess of Love... and I hesitate to ask Cadence for help so early on in my first relationship."

Rainbow chuckled. "Yeah, I'm not sure we need that much help..." she said wearily.

Heartened by the conversation finally being on track, Twilight rallied her courage. "So!" she said brightly, trying to cover her discomfort. "Elephant in the room... You say you like me?"

"Horse apples!" Rainbow exclaimed sitting bolt upright in her chair, wincing at the motion and rubbing her head.

Twilight gave Rainbow a sympathetic smile, feeling relieved she got the question out. "Sorry, but I'm pretty sure we have to talk about this item in particular."

"Ok..." Rainbow groaned. "Well I did... I mean... I do, but... Dammit!" She put her hooves over her eyes, taking a deep breath.

Come on Dash, we're just getting started, Twilight thought. She briefly entertained the idea of giving Rainbow a hug and simply pushing her out the door. I'm pretty sure that wouldn't fix anything though...

"Just slow down," Twilight said quietly.

Rainbow took another deep breath and lowered her hooves. "It's complicated, and my brain feels like it's been through the wringer..." she explained. "Last night was a bit of a disaster..."

Twilight got an idea. "Alright, let's work backwards then."

"Huh?" Rainbow grunted, a confused look on her face.

"How do you feel about me right now, at this moment?" Twilight asked.

"Ugh..." Rainbow groaned again. "I like you... Just not the same way I did last night." She hung her head, not meeting Twilight's eyes. "More of a 'really-good-friend-I-think-is-cute' kinda way..."

It was Twilight's turn to look confused. "What's changed since last night?" she asked.

"Well... I had a talk with Fluttershy this morning," Rainbow said. "More of a lecture really... Or a beating... It felt more like a beating..."

Twilight laughed despite her better instincts. Don't laugh, she's using humor to cover pain. Be sympathetic!

"What did she lecture you about?" Twilight asked, curiosity warring with sympathy for her friend.

Rainbow bit her lip, hesitating. "She says I need to go back to Midnight," she said, looking at the table again. "And I agree with her," she whispered.

Twilight blinked. Not what I expected at all. Where is Rarity when I need her?!

Out loud, Twilight said, "That's good to hear, Dash."

"Yeah, but I don't even know if she wants me back," Rainbow said forlornly.

"It has been a while since you two broke up," Twilight said and immediately wished she hadn't as Rainbow's shoulders slumped. "I didn't mean-" she said quickly.

"It's alright," Rainbow interjected. "It is what it is. But I'm gonna try. I should've went back a long time ago."

"For what it's worth, I hope she says yes," Twilight said, mind racing, trying to think of the right thing to say. "You two were meant for each other."

"Thanks Twilight," Rainbow said, looking up and giving Twilight a small smile. "I do still love her... I've just been messed up... I made a mistake leaving her and... It's just kinda all gone downhill since..."

Twilight slumped back in her chair and huffed out a breath. This was a lot for her to process. First Rainbow causing a public scene over me, and now the next day she's going back to Midnight? I really need to figure this relationship stuff out... But back on track.

"So back to last night," Twilight said hesitantly.

"Yeah," Rainbow responded.

"How did you feel about me last night?

Rainbow was quiet for a moment, staring at the inactive Cutie Map. After a moment she spoke. "Last night, I was convinced I had feelings for you. I was jealous that Rarity got to you before I did. I was angry with myself for not asking you sooner."

"You say convinced?" Twilight asked, a quizzical expression on her face.

"Fluttershy says I was confusing my feelings for Midnight, and trying to replace her... With you..." Rainbow said, a blush rising in her cheeks.

"Huh," Twilight said, at a loss for words.

"And I think she's right, because the more I think about going back, the more I realize who I should be with..." Rainbow said, still not looking at Twilight. "I'm really sorry Twilight..." she said, her bottom lip quivering. "I made such a mess for you two..."

Twilight was at a complete loss for words. Do something!

Twilight got up from her chair, crossing to Rainbow, and wrapped her in a hug. Rainbow leaned into her, taking in a shuddering breath. Twilight could feel tears soaking into her coat. "I said it's OK," she said quietly, squeezing Rainbow a bit tighter, "and I'm glad you're here so we can work this out."

"I'm not going to try and get between you and Rarity," Rainbow said, still leaning into Twilight. "I should be happy for you two, and I am, really. I don't want to screw things up for you two more than I already have."

Twilight let go of Rainbow, keeping a hoof on her shoulder and gave her a sympathetic look. "Well, I don't think anything is beyond repair yet," she said.

Rainbow looked at Twilight out of the corner of her eye. "Yeah, but you didn't see Rarity last night. Apologizing to her is not a talk I'm not looking forward to..."

"I'm sure it's not that bad," Twilight said, sitting down beside Rainbow's chair.

Rainbow gave a short laugh. "She dragged me into an alley by my mane!" she said with a genuine smile, rubbing the sore spot on her head.

Twilight snorted inelegantly, hooves shooting up to cover her mouth. "Oh my!" she exclaimed.

Rainbow settled back in her seat, smiling and she wiped her tears away. "She was pretty mad."

Twilight giggled at the thought of Rarity dragging Rainbow by her mane. "I can imagine."

"So... how're you doing?" Rainbow asked, looking a little less strained

"Honestly?" Twilight asked rhetorically. "Tired. It's been a bit of a roller coaster the last few days. A happy one, but a lot of new stuff, and it's been a lot to process."

"I'll bet," Rainbow said nodding.

"I mean, I've never dated anypony before, and Rarity's being patient, which is great..." she said looking uneasy. "But I guess everypony's going to know I like mares, and it's freaking me out, because nopony knew before," she said looking hopefully at Rainbow.

"Really Twilight, you've got nothing to worry about," Rainbow said.

"Says you, who's been out for, like, ever," Twilight said with a sarcastic smile.

Rainbow chuckled. "Well, you know me... Whatcha see is whatcha get," she said spreading her forelegs.

"Rarity keeps telling me it's going to be fine, but I keep chasing it in my head, worrying about it," Twilight continued. "I don't know how it's going to play out, and if I don't know what's going to happen, I don't know how to prepare for it!"

"Curse of that big brain of yours. You think too much Twi," Rainbow said, tapping her head for emphasis. "You just gotta stop thinking everything to death. Chill out, relax. No one cares if you're gay. I mean, they will for like five minutes, then they'll see the next shiny thing and yammer about that."

"Yeah, but I'm a princess too, and there's a bunch of stuff that comes along with that and a lot more attention..." Twilight said nervously.

"Well I only see one princess around here that actually has a stallion, and that's Cadence," Rainbow said giving Twilight a level gaze.

Twilight let out a genuine laugh. "I suppose that's true... I didn't think about it like that. But Celestia isn't gay. There's been plenty of stories of stallions coming and going over the years. She just doesn't keep them around. And Luna hasn't shown interest in anypony."

"Yeah, but the rumors are still there anyway because there aren't any stallions to stop them," Rainbow said. "So you won't be viewed much differently. Your rumor just gets confirmed."

"I suppose," Twilight agreed.

"You know what you need to do," Rainbow said, giving Twilight a serious look, "is just find a way to turn off your brain."

"Well... I can think of one way that seems effective..." Twilight said sheepishly.

"And that is?" Rainbow asked.

"Well..." Twilight said with a shy smile, "Rarity needs to help..."

Rainbow blinked at Twilight and then let out a laugh. "Oh man, that's awesome Twilight!" she said with a wide grin, sounding more like herself.

Twilight blushed. "When I'm with her, the rest of the stuff just seems to go away," she said.

Rainbow nodded and they both fell silent for a moment, until a thought crossed Twilight's mind.

"So what about Spring Step?" Twilight asked, filling the silence.

"Huh?"

"I mean... If you're going back to Midnight..." Twilight trailed off, suddenly unsure of her line of questioning.

Rainbow blinked. "Oh, well I wasn't really into Spring Step. I was just trying to get her in bed," she said blowing her mane out of her eyes.

Twilight let out a startled laugh, looking at Rainbow with wide eyes.

Rainbow gave Twilight a lopsided grin. "We're being honest, right?"

Twilight laughed again. "Yes, I suppose we are," she said smiling brightly.

"And besides, Spring made it clear she does not want to see me again," Rainbow said. "So you're really into Rarity, eh?" she asked, changing the subject.

Twilight was thankful for the new direction. "Yeah, it's strange. I've never felt like this about anypony before. I mean, I had a... crush on Rarity, but never did anything about it." She could feel a blush creeping up. Talking about her feelings for Rarity with somepony still felt strange and embarrassing.

"Well, she is hot," Rainbow said teasingly, giving Twilight a wink.

Twilight stuck out her tongue in response.

Rainbow chuckled, closing her eyes and leaning her head back.

"Seriously though," Twilight said, her face thoughtful, "when she told me she had feelings for me, I just kind of woke up, ya know?"

"I do..." Rainbow said, not opening her eyes. "It changes everything when you find out somepony cares about you."

"Was it like that with Midnight?" Twilight asked.

Rainbow opened her eyes. Twilight saw a mix of emotions she couldn't place cross Rainbow's face and felt instantly guilty again. Stop asking about Midnight, it's obviously a sore subject!

To Twilight's relief, Rainbow gave a small smile saying, "Yeah... I wasn't even looking when she came along... suddenly having a special somepony can really throw your world for a loop."

"I guess I'm lucky that I already know Rarity really well..." Twilight said in an attempt to take the subject away from Rainbow's ex. "I imagine it should make things easier."

"Well, some things sure," Rainbow said. "But you're still going to see a different side of Rarity that nopony else sees, and up until now that included you."

"Oh," Twilight said dumbly. She could feel a tickling of realization sinking in.

"And you're not exactly an open book Twi. Rarity's going to learn new stuff about you too," Rainbow continued.

Twilight's heart beat sped up and she could feel sweat pricking her brow as the anxiety started coming back.

"And she already knows you well enough to know when you're lying, so you're not going to be able to hide things you may not want a new marefriend to see either," Rainbow said, oblivious to Twilight's growing discomfort.

Twilight's mouth was suddenly very dry. She swallowed hard. She's right, I'm going to be sharing everything with Rarity, and she's not exactly like I picture her in my mind, and I'm not the same to her, and I guess everypony is different, but what if she doesn't like the me that she sees and what if there's things about her I don't know that-

"Earth to Twilight," Rainbow said waving a hoof in front of Twilight's face, breaking her train of thought.

Twilight snapped back to attention to see a weary looking Rainbow Dash smiling at her. Twilight blushed, laying her ears against her head.

Rainbow laughed. "Sorry," she said, "I didn't mean to freak you out there."

Twilight gave a high-pitched, nervous laugh. "It's alright," she said, her voice cracking. "I'm just wondering how it's all going to fall apart on me is all..."

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "There you go again. It'll be fine as long as you work at it," she said, waving a dismissive hoof, then she gave Twilight a sly smile. "Ya know, I'm starting to think Rarity's got her work cut out for her with you."

"Hey!" Twilight said, giving Rainbow a glare, ears laid against her head. But she's probably got a point, she thought.

"I'm just happy I know more about something than you do!" Rainbow said giving Twilight a bright smile. "And that is not a challenge to go read all of the relationship books in your library," she said pointing a hoof at Twilight.

Twilight heaved a sigh. "I hope it's alright if I irritate you with questions on occasion?" she asked wearily.

"Sure thing," Rainbow said without hesitation. "Just maybe write them down for now until I get things with Midnight sorted out?"

"Already on it!" Twilight said flashing Rainbow a wide smile.

"Of course you are..." Rainbow said closing her eyes and putting a hoof over her face.