Rainbow Dash... The one pony that cared for me. She stayed and always hanged out with me. That... liked me for me. Also, the only pony that I cared for as well. Was that alright? Could I be forgiven for doing such cruel acts to her friends? Can things go back the way they were? I don't believe it's possible but, she always was nice to me and offered to give me a second chance. Does that make it alright? I don't know but I feel as it's too late to find out now. If I was given that chance again, I would ask.
I felt angry and disgusted at myself for the way I acted. Everypony looked at me and saw me as a monster. I can understand, to a degree. I had acted horribly towards them and never apologized to them. They had every right to hate me but I wish to be forgiven. I wanted to get rid of the feeling of hate and loneliness in my heart but I guess that is just being selfish. I did have time to do it but I never did. I never bothered to consider her offer. But, again, I did have enough time on this world. I decided to walk over to her place. I had to get my thoughts together after all...
I felt as I don't deserve somepony's trust. I don't deserve to have friends. My lips seem to curl a little by themselves to form a small grin. I can still remember the old days back when we were little. How we would race on Cloudsdale, always hang out and play pranks on other ponies. Those days are gone though and I guess, if I were to live through this, I might make new memories instead of holding on to the past. I could even look at everypony normally without feeling like an outcast. The irony of the situation is frightening. When I think of the past, I can't be the same griffin I once was. I treated everypony terribly yet I want to be forgiven easily.
I stopped and looked up at the sky seeing other ponies flying past me.. Maybe I did have some time to ask her. After that, I could at least know if I can be forgiven. After that, they could do whatever they wanted to me but I needed to ask her first. After about an hour, I saw RD's house and gazed back at the it with amazement. When had that clock started working? Has it really been that since I've been here? Shows that time really does fly and waits for nopony. I flew up and took a deep breath. I turned back to the front gate.
I placed a claw on the door and sighed once more. After a few seconds, I knocked on the door. I waited for some time but nopony answered. Maybe she was in town or something? As I was about to leave, the door opened. I stared at her as she seemed to be surprised by my sudden appearance. A stray memory floated into my mind about her telling me it was very rude to stare but, it was hard not to. So many things flew in my mind, but I couldn't put them into words to actually say, so I did the next best thing I could think of. I hugged her.
"Gilda?" She asked, surprised.
What was there for me to say? Should I just speak my mind and hope she wouldn't mind? Or maybe I should just ask the question? Or maybe . . . no, that wasn't right. I should just be casual as usual. I backed up and spoke.
"...Hey Dash." I said, "How's it going?"
Things had gotten considerably better when she popped into my life. My best memory was when we flew around Cloudsdale without a care in the world. When I was around her, I tried to put up a tough act, making it seem like I didn't care about anything but she had seemed unfazed. My act broke down when we starting pranking everypony just for fun. I tried to pull back and act tough again, but I knew it was no use. She liked me for me. That was the past. This is the present. I know what I must do, but it's just so difficult to accomplish it.
"Fine... What you doing back here?" She asked.
My heart was being shredded as she asked that. I know I said I came here to apologize and be forgiven but, I couldn't get the words out to express how I felt. Why can't I just say I'm sorry? I stand in front of her, wondering what I am going to say. I couldn't think of anything. What's worse, I don't know who is going to answer. I want to say I'm sorry. No, that's to simple. Can I ask you a question? No, that's stupid. Maybe I was just over thinking this. I knew I was getting sidetracked. I have to do this now, or I won't be able to do it later.
"Well..."
I tried to say something, anything to show how I felt but nothing came out. I've been mean for so long, I don't know if it's possible to
it.
"I just wanted to see how you were." I said, struggling for words.
She looked at me confused and I suddenly had the feeling that I may not be welcomed here, that my coming here was a bad idea. Who was I to interrupt her life? I started to tremble as I realized how stupid this was to think I could go back. I had done so much bad stuff to her friends, I didn't belong here, I had no right to find an answer to my question. No right-
"I'm fine. Is something wrong?" She asked.
"I... just wanted to say something to you." I said.
"Huh? What is it?" She asked.
I felt something in the back of my eyes building up. Something I haven't felt in a long time. Was it... tears? Slowly, they escaped my eyes and could no longer hold back what I was feeling. She rushed over, confronting me.
"Hey, what's wrong? Did somepony hurt you?" She asked, caring.
I shook my head and said,
"No. I... I just want to apologize for what I did to you friends. I acted horribly back then and I just wanted to-"
She... Suddenly hugged me... No yelling. No anger. Just... companion. All I can feel right now is happiness. Why? Why is she forgiving me so easily? Tears continued to come down my eyes. It's a new sensation. Maybe I don't have to ask my question. Maybe she understands... I can't help but smile as I hug her back.
"It's ok. I know you're sorry. You coming here is proof enough." She said, smiling.
"I really mean it though. I want to turn over a new leaf." I said, still crying.
"I know. I forgive you." She said.
I guess true friends stick together after all. Despite how I treated her friends, she still see's me as friends. Not a monster.
"I know it won't be easy but I will do everything I can to fix my past actions." I told her.
"And I'll be there to help you." She said, smiling.
I feel as I can finally move on. I can get rid of my tough guy act and be friendly with everypony. Only time will tell...
