Rose thumbed through her precious book. She was holding her exotic form. She had to get used to its quirks. Heck, even just its balance was new and strange, but she was getting a grasp of it.

Full of Lyra's kind donation, she didn't feel too worn as she kept the shape firmly in place.

Humans. The book seemed to paint a picture of them. Whenever trouble came up between them, usually between a husband and a wife, it had two common reasons. One, they simply grew tired of one another. She doubted she'd have that problem.

Two, deceit. One would lie to the other, betray the trust the other felt was complete, and the damage would never be truly undone. Not that the letters really went into detail about the aftermath, except where it was dramatic and interesting. It didn't matter. Lying could bust humans apart really fast.

Rose looked down at her furry form. She had to... lie. Right? There was no way Noah would accept a changeling. He would be furious with her for the deceit she already wove. If she...

She scowled and threw the magazine limply to the side. There had to be a way...

"Hey there!" came an enthusiastic voice. Pinkie dropped from the ceiling, hanging upside down in a way that only made sense to her. "Blood Rose, right?"

Rose practically hopped out of her skin. "W-what? Why are you in my house?"

Pinkie tilted her head. "I thought we were friends, so I came to say hi."

How much did she know? Rose scowled and scrambled to her feet before she realized... She had never met Pinkie as a biped, only as a pony. "How do you know me?"

Pinkie waved a hoof up and down at Rose. "Because you're still the same pony, gosh."

The dreaded Pinkie. She had fought like a true devil in the attack. She was overwhelmingly powerful, and yet... so cheerful. "I am?"

"Like, duh?" Pinkie dropped to the ground and hopped up on her hindlegs, standing as if that was just another thing she could do. "Why are you standing up all the time now?"

Rose looked over Pinkie. She was upright, but lacked the shape. She was a crude mockery of Noah's ideal mate. She felt no threat on that front. "I..."

"Are you chasing Noah?" Her head tilted a little.

Rose went cold. Was she busted? "I..."

"If you're playing a prank on him, stop. He's sensitive, like Fluttershy." She waved a hoof at Rose.

Rose blinked at that. "Oh! Well, alright? I won't prank him."

"Good!" She dropped back to all fours. "So why are you still standing?"

"This isn't a prank." Just how much did Pinkie know? Rose was terrified of the possibilities.

Pinkie gasped loudly, making Rose flinch. "You're hunting him!" Rose cringed and took a half-step away even as Pinkie followed. "That still counts as a prank! Wait..." She stopped and her eyes half-lidded. "How can you hunt him? He doesn't have a marefriend or a wife to replace."

If she knew that... "So... you know?"

Pinkie blinked at that. "What? That you're a changeling? Duh. It's kinda obvious." She rolled a hoof in the air. "So what are you up to? Cause if it's bad, I'll have to leap into action!"

Rose was... baffled. If it was bad? Being a changeling wasn't good enough? Maybe... it wasn't? She licked her lips a little. "I want to get closer to Noah and be loved by him."

Pinkie looked thoughtful a moment. "Do you love him, or do you just want him to love you?"

Did she? She considered what she knew of him. She had been learning more and more of him, and his curious race. She had... She liked it when he smiled, and was annoyed when he was annoyed. Was that love? She grasped one hand with the other, twining the fingers in a way she'd seen Noah do before. "I... don't know."

Pinkie gave a grave nod. "Exactly the right answer. Phew. I thought a moment you were just trying to seduce him and drain all his love away and then I'd have to stop you."

That was pretty much what she had in mind and she flushed just a bit. She was awful at infiltration! "I don't want to hurt him." Besides, if she was careful, he'd be a lot more valuable as a long-term source, instead of a quick feast. "Why are you being so nice to me? Don't you hate changelings?"

Pinkie put a hoof to her chest. "Hate? That's a strong word. I don't want to hate anypony. I guess I don't like your meanie-face queen at all." She stuck out her tongue. "But I don't know you. You haven't done anything wrong." She pointed off. "I mean, Lyra seems to like you a lot. She wouldn't stop talking about you!"

Rose darkened at that. Her victim had blabbed everything. Why did she have to be interrupted before she could finish properly?!

"So are you a nice changeling, not that I ever heard of one of those, or a meanie-face changeling?" Pinkie reached behind herself as she rose up, drawing a cannon into view. "I'm ready in either event, but I'm kinda hoping it's the first. I'm still planning that party of yours."

Rose grimaced at the appearance of the cannon. That same cannon had dispatched an unfortunate number of her kin during the ill-fated rush on Canterlot. She didn't want to challenge it. She didn't want to challenge the pink menace. "H-how can I prove I'm nice?"

Pinkie blinked. She pushed the cannon away and it seemed to slip between here and there, vanishing. She fell to all fours, looking up at Rose. "That's actually a really good question." She tapped her chin a moment. "How about... you show me how this changeling stuff works without being all hissy and mean and stuff?"

Rose ventured a smile. "I could... do some of that, sure." She wouldn't reveal the important parts, the secrets. "Though you're pretty... I mean."

"I'm pretty?" She darkened in her cheeks. "Aw! That's sweet. If you weren't already trying to be Noah's marefriend, I'd have so many more questions."

"No! I mean..." She could get mauled or killed for it. "Permission to be... truthful?"

Pinkie blinked at that. "Granted?"

"During the... The last time you dealt with us. You were a very fierce fighter."

Pinkie nodded quickly. "I'm a defender of Equestria and smiles. Of course I fight hard." She pointed at Rose. "What do you fight for?"

Rose blinked owlishly in kind. "The hive?"

"Huh? What's it like, you know, the hive? Lots of buzzing?"

"Yes..." Rose reached for Pinkie and wasn't stopped from giving the pink menace a gentle pat on her fluffy mane. "I've been away from it for a while."

"Do ya miss it?"

Did she? She thought back to it and could remember stern lessons. Her queen would usually scowl at her and say unkind things.

"It's alright." Pinkie was brushing away a tear from Rose's face. "You don't have to say if you don't wanna."

Rose was confused. Pinkie was so much nicer than most of the rumors and horrors whispered of her. "So... about Lyra?"

Pinkie snorted at that. "Hey, some ponies just like having some fun, no harm in that." She waved a hoof in the air. "From what I heard, you had lots of fun." She half-lidded her eyes in a sultry display. "And so did she. It was like a party, but not the sort you invite lots of ponies over for, usually..." She reared up. "So, like that kind of party?"

Rose was confused at that. Was she being propositioned? Was one of the great warriors of Equestria showing signs that she wouldn't mind being the squealing victim of a changeling?

Pinkie waved it off. "I wouldn't say 'victim', pfft. We're both grown ponies. Neither of us is a victim if we do it as friends, right?"

Had Rose spoken during her confusion? "I-I, really?"

"I'm just checking. We haven't even had your introductory party. We need to get to know each other better, so maybe a little party, just the two of us." She gestured at herself and then Rose. "We'll both learn something and have fun!"

Rose considered that. Truly, she knew very little of Pinkie. "So... what do you like?"

"I like a lot of things."

That was less than helpful. "Let us start at the start. Do you like... mares or stallions? Do you have a favorite pony in the whole world?"

Pinkie got a heavy look of concentration. "I... I like lots of ponies. Gosh. I mean, even for a, um, private party, they both have their plusses. Mares are nice and soft and usually clean and nice-smelling. They know how you feel, so they can be very good at dealing with it, you know?"

Rose gave a little nod, but let Pinkie go right on.

"Now stallions are bigger and stronger. They can reach all the way inside and get to those special places and leave you feeling like a filled eclair, mmm, and that's both fun and special." She gave herself a hug before falling back to all fours. "Both have their perks. Do I have to pick one?"

Rose supposed, in the end, she didn't, but... "How am I supposed to pick one?"

Pinkie rolled a hoof. "So don't. Besides, aren't you, uh... Don't you have one you 'are'? I mean, are you a mare or a stallion?"

Rose crossed her arms. "I can be either, but I... I'm more used to being a mare. It doesn't matter. Drones don't foal, so my standby gender is just about meaningless."

"Meaningless?!" Pinkie hopped up, thrusting a hoof at Rose. "You stop that right there! You're more than just a disguise, as cool as that is."

"I am?"

"Of course." Pinkie nodded. "If you were just that, then you'd just be another meanie changeling, and I'd have to blast you out of town. Good thing that isn't true."

Rose quirked a nervous smile. "Good thing..." She wasn't sure this was headed in a healthy direction at all.

Pinkie got a suddenly devious look. "So, hey, if you're good at being both, why not be both?"

"What?"

Pinkie lowered that pointing hoof to between Rose's legs, flat at the moment with nothing to see. "If you want to, couldn't you just be a stallion there? You could be a mare in all the good ways and a stallion in all the good ways, right?"

Author's Note

Pinkie, this is not how we deal with changelings.

Or is this exactly how we should deal with changelings?

Which way is the typo?