De Writer Meets Nayomi

by De Writer

Rating: everyone
Tags: Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Comedy, Adventure, Random, Alternate Universe
Length: 6222

I just wanted to try my hand at vegetable gardening! What could POSSIBLY go wrong with that?

De Writer, taking a break from the roads as a Rom, is trying to raise a vegetable garden. After hearing a noise, outside his cottage, he finds somepony in his garden! Headfirst!

Published 2016-09-15 21:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-09-15 21:00:01 UTC

De Writer Meets Nayomi

Author's Note

This story is based on but is non canon to my AU. It started out as an RP with Nayomi Hataki and the character of Nayomi is his. Nayomi is used with permission.
All violence is slapstick. No pony was hurt in the writing of this story.
My vegetable garden, on the other hoof, was totaled.

De Writer Meets Nayomi

I heard a loud metallic crash! Then the thud of somepony hitting the ground!

Looking out, I saw the hind half of an armored Earth pony sticking up out of the middle of my vegetable garden! Why do these things always happen to me? This is the third year in a row that something has wrecked my garden!
The first time was the lemming stampede off the cliff! Not high enough to hurt the little buggers but apparently high enough to make them hungry! Nothing left when they moved on.

Then there was that misfiring Lightning Core that Cloudsdale “accidentally” dropped. Fried veggies, anypony?

Now this? I guess that I am just not cut out for vegetable gardening!

I went on out and saw what looked to be a useful amount of metal scrap, clinging to the cliff face not far above the plot sticking up from my vegetable plot.

Hm. The armor was evaporating. You don’t see that everyday. Shadow armor is pretty rare. A small tweak showed that the pony was unconscious. Good. I grabbed the hinder hooves with my blue magic and began to haul the pony out.

As the last of the armor evaporated, I realized that I was hauling a Changeling out of the ground. As she came clear, I saw the bat-wings. Eep!

Not just any Changeling! A Queen! Could my day get any better?

The changeling queen didn’t react to being dragged. She was either really out of it or dead. The latter was unlikely as her wings twitched as she was moved.

Mmm … Come to think, she might pull easier if I … I ducked back into my present home (I have had a LOT of them over my longish life) and came back with my disguise as an elderly donkey in place. I also had a tooled leather Rom pulling harness.

Fit her into it and buckled it up snugly. Not only did it make pulling 100% easier, it just happened to secure her front legs, too! Might be a useful advantage if she was cranky when she woke up!

Dragging her to the house, I looked sadly back at the trail of ruin through what had survived of my garden. Dragging an unconscious Changeling Queen was not gentle to my poor plants.

Putting aside such thoughts, I tucked her in under a blanket on my couch. Got her a unicorn ice bag and put it around her horn.

I got out the Orb of the Ages, activated it and did a little backtracking of my unusual visitor. It did not take long. Then I stoked up the fire in stove and popped on a pair of clover burgers. After what I’d seen, she could probably use one.

She wandered in to the kitchen, free of the harness but holding the ice bag in place. Looking me straight in the eye, she said, “Thanks for the Burger. That is a nice disguise. Now, where are YOU? I can only see you with my eyes!”

She looked at me with a weighted gaze “I’m to tired to be threatening and you seem peaceful enough. Who are you and where am I?”

I returned somewhat fliply, “Glad that you are not in a mood to be threatening. There are not many Changeling Queens. They tend to be pretty fierce.

“I am Marchhare. At least I am while I am in this disguise. Thanks for the compliment on it, by the way. As for where you are, you are in my house called Everfree Edge. We are not too far from Ponyville and close to the home of Heather Bloom, Duchess Red Hoof. She and I are old friends.

“You WERE in the crater where my vegetable garden was. You took out the Maize, mashed the tomatoes and came to rest in the zucchini. Headfirst. That is why the ice bag. Thanks to that Shadow Armor, you were only knocked out.”

I paused and put her clover burger on a plate. I set out assorted fixings and buns along side it on the table.

“Help yourself. Tea, coffee, water? I would not recommend any sort of beer or wine right now. Get over the headache first.”

My guest, looking a bit puzzled, sat to eat.

“Im not really much for eating sorry, so this place? No psycho princesses? No undead army living in the shadows? No giant things that smash you so hard you end up unconscious in a vegetable garden?” she asked rather more seriously one would expect

Responding to her seriousness, I replied, “None of the above. I do not permit things in this world that may endanger my daughters or their realm.

“I do know that you were thrown through a dimensional nexus. Something tried to follow you. I stomped it hard. Not sure if I killed it or not. Very sure that it is not coming back.”

I paused to snag the other burger and sat across from my guest, who still had not introduced herself.

“Now, I know that you are not much for eating. I knew that when I fixed it for you. Go ahead and eat that. It will assist your recovery. Consider it a medicine. I do know more about Changelings than the average donkey.”

I looked looked my gray, bat-winged, fanged, Changeling guest in the eye and smiled. “There may be hope for me as a gardener yet. You did less damage to the garden than the lemming stampede two years ago. Last year,

Cloudsdale Weather lost a malfunctioning Lightning Core there. This year, you.

“I have at least a row of carrots and maybe a few of the beets. I think a potato plant may be savable. You represent a huge improvement in my luck at gardening.”

She replied, “I’m not known to represent luck. More like the end of a peaceful life. What did you say your name was?”

I grinned at my guest who was trying very hard to be polite and nibble at the edges of the burger. I leaned back and gestured expansively as I replied, “Oh, right. Introductions. My name sort of depends on whether I am in this disguise or some other. I have one that underlies all the rest. Just like you in that regard.

“Starting there, I was named De Writer, Chronicler of Equestria and foster father to Celestia and Luna.

“When I am in this disguise, I am Marchhare, known to the Rom as the Ghost Who Guides. “The Rom have an 800 year old tradition that I died on the desert of Celestia’s Anvil, guiding them to safety.

“Your turn.”

“I’m Nayomi Hataki, Queen of Shadows and mother queen to currently very few changelings. I’m engaged to be married to a local woman named Deceptivesun and a spiritual sister to the Whisper Sisters.”

I raised my eyebrows at that. “You know the Whisper Sisters too? Their dimension is really quite close. A am their father by adoption. They adopted me!

“Well, this is refreshing! It is not every day that a sort of relative, um, DROPS in like this!”

Nayomi winced at the joke. She was carefully examining the beautiful tooling of the Rom made leather pulling harness. The one that I had used to get her out of the garden.

“So you’re what? My dad? The only father I ever had died horrifically in front of me,” she said lowering her ears.

Dropping the Marchhare disguise, I sort of rooted around in my forelock at my horn root with my right front hoof as I thought that through.

“In a spiritual sense, you could say that. It would be up to you, really.

“If you accept that your spiritual sisterhood with the Whisper Sisters extends to their spiritual and physical family, then yes. I would be your adopted father. You would be adopting me. If you did, I would accept it.

“As for losing me to some horrid fate, not a chance in any universe! When I was made foster father and Chronicler of the Princesses, I got stuck with one of the nastiest forms of immortality known. I was displaced in time. What you see is just a shadow cast on the fabric of time itself. Unless I permit it, I can’t be touched at all. Not by anything.

“Unlike a shadow, I can touch anything else.

“You won’t lose me. I will, in time, lose you to accident or old age.”

“Hey, I’m a shadow and I can touch anything I wish. You’ll be waiting a long time for me to die of old age, Dad.”

“My dear Nayomi, you cannot believe how much I wish for some friend or relative who can or will live for a truly long time. I know of only three at this time.

“My daughters, Celestia and Luna, of course. They are immortal, after all. The other is the Duchess of Red Hoof who is similar to a Changeling. She is a Heart Keeper.

As for the shadow thing, I don’t always have one. Only if I want to project myself on time so that I will make one, do I have one.”

I vanished from my place and was behind her, with her knife in my hoof. I put it on the table in front of her and then walked into the room from the front room.

“You will notice that I did not teleport or use any magic at all to do those things. Where I want to be, I am. Instantaneously. It is part of how I am immortal.

“Hope that I did not upset you, there. Just showing you something.” Sadly I added, “I have to work at it to be touchable at all. Sometimes I would very much wish it was otherwise.”

I sat back at the table and took up my burger. “I do not need to eat, any more than you do. Less, in fact. Developing a taste for such foods is not a sign of weakness. It is better camouflage. Among other things.”

“I only eat as I choose. Why did you help me?” The changeling asked, her wounds already healing and her gray eyes becoming more bloodshot in appearance.

“I already covered that. One; eating can help you to recover from a trauma. Neither of us NEEDS to eat. Two; eating is good camouflage. The best way to win a fight is to get what you want without having to fight at all. It sets regular ponies at ease, which makes them less suspicious and, if you are trying to rob them, easier marks.”

I paused to grin and pointed out, “I did check you out pretty carefully. Frankly, I do not care whether you deal honestly with most ponies. It will keep them on their hooves if you do not.”

Taking another bite of my clover burger, I paused to regard my Changeling guest. “One thing that I did find was that you are a very loyal ally if honorably treated.

“About WHY I helped you, well, to be honest, I was looking to see how much of my garden I could save. Then I found out Who and what you are. That moved you WAY up my list of ponies and other creatures that the realm can use. Sounds pompous, but it is true. Add in being a sister in spirit to my foster daughters the Whisper Sisters and it became a lock.

“Congratulations. As my “sort of” daughter, you are also a “sort of sister” to Celestia and Luna in this world. You will be mentioned in the Chronicle. They will need to know.”

“They going to react well to being related to a changeling?” Nayomi asked.

I managed a small chuckle as I replied, “THEY won’t mind at all. There are others who do hold prejudices. Heather Bloom, Duchess Red Hoof, is very similar to a Changeling. They grew up with her, played with her as fillies and tried to save her and her family during the Hearthwarming War.

“They were desolate at the thought that they had lost her, millennia ago.

When she returned a few years back, you never saw such a reunion! They were actually playing Dragon Tag in gardens of Canterlot!”

I paused and looked at my visitor. “There was a bit of trouble at the royal wedding of Princess Cadence and Prince Shining Armor. Changeling Queen Chrysalis tried to invade and take over. The ploy failed.

“My foster daughters have dealt mercifully with Chrysalis and her followers because they do believe in fair second chances.

“In spite of invasion and war, they greeted Heather Bloom with joy. The main difference between her, a Heart Keeper, and a regular Changeling is that her kind, ages past, learned the value of sharing love and gaining more, freely given in return. They mated into the pony blood lines and lost some of the chitin shell but kept all of the Changeling abilities and most of the appearance.

“If you treat them with reasonable respect, and do not conceal what you are from them, I am sure that Celestia and Luna will accept you. I will prepare the way by noting your arrival in the Chronicle for them.”

Getting up, and giving Nayomi a true grin of amusement, I suggested, “Let’s go out to the garden and see if you lost anything during your recent and undignified arrival. Besides, I can see if I have more vegetables that survived.”

“Can i meet them?” Nayomi asked tilting her head slightly. "And you mentioned your daughter?“

I led the way out into the sunlit ruins of my garden. “Among the the Rom, sometimes called gypsies, I have met and married my wives and had many children over the last 800 years. Presently, I have one living direct descendant.

“Black Lotus is an accomplished dancer of Exotic Dressage and a fine leather worker. She made the pulling harness that I used to get you out of here.”

I gestured expansively at my mangled garden. I wrinkled my nose in amusement. You need not worry about meeting Celestia and Luna. That will happen. I guarantee it.”

I got down close and started checking the potato plants. “I was right. I can save at least half of this lot!”

I looked up at my new “daughter.” You will meet the Rom and Black Lotus first. They will be along in a few days. They have been very tolerant of my gardening experiments. Amused, but tolerant.

“It is pretty hard to miss the Rom when you see them. They are descended from full sized horses. Most are unicorns.”

I finished tying the plants that I could save to stakes.

I noticed that Nayomi was looking at the wreckage plastered to the cliff face.
"Destruction is usually my forte,” she sighed. “I was a dancer at one point. When I say dancer, I mean exotic. I was good, really good, but that was only for a few weeks while I got my bearings in a new world. When I was out did, did anything odd happen?”

I looked up from rooting about my garden, trying to save some of the beets by replanting. I grinned and offered, “You and the Rom should get along just fine. If you were a dancer and don’t mind doing that sort of work, Black Lotus will be happy to show you the ropes for the Rom’s types of dance.”

I packed soil around the last savable beet. “For the other thing, define odd. I have someone that I turn out to be connected to crash into my garden while wearing Shadow Armor. She recovers and turns out to be a Changeling Queen.

“Something, a thing that I still have not figured out fully, but was an obvious enough threat to my foster daughters’ realm that I kicked it out of here, tried to follow you through a dimensional nexus.

“Did you mean that stuff, or did I happen to miss something? Oh, about that thing plastered to the cliff. Is it yours or is it up for grabs?”

“Im not sure… anyway. So this Black Lotus, is she pretty?” She practically slapped herself. “Don’t answer that! I’m engaged.”

I gave a snicker-whicker at Nayomi’s little by-play and said, “You are not sure? You don’t know if it is yours?

“DIBS! Mine now!”

“As for Black Lotus, she wandered right through beautiful and came out stunning. Of course, I may be prejudiced. I mean, being her father and all!”

“Dont want to think about it! If I do I might be tempted,” she said, growling at herself.

I nodded. “Don’t worry about being tempted around Black Lotus,” I said. “Never forget this. Without temptation resisted there is no virtue. Besides, if she knows that you are bespoke, she will not give you any encouragement.”

I strolled up the garden path of destruction to the crater that Nayomi had made out of my poor maize. Looking down into the disturbed earth as much by magic as by eye, I saw something.

I called, “Nayomi! Come look at this! I do think that it is yours. I could be wrong, though.”

Nayomi walked over to him. “Hmm? What is it?” She asked tilting her head slightly.

“I was sort of hoping that you could tell me. It is a technomagical artifact of some sort.

“This may be a bit forward on such a short acquaintance as ours, but were you, to put it delicately, acquiring something of that sort when you got rifted through to this particular portion of my garden?” I asked with a bit of a grin and pointing at the bottom of the hole, where a small bit of a larger metallic something was sticking up out of the loose dirt. You could see the magical glow in broad daylight.

“Yes, I was getting something of that nature. Then suddenly I’m in the shadow rift with several broken ribs and a sprained foreleg,” she said in a tone that made it seem like it was almost normal for her.

I raised my eyebrows. “Um … Tell me, is this thing here the item that you were acquiring? If not, have we been left an unpleasant little present by the thing that tried to follow you? To be precise, just how much danger is my garden and everything around it in?”

“It’ll be fine. They’re just conduit crystals” she said making her way to it.
I looked at my guest starting to root casually around the protruding metal bit down in the hole. I could easily see the glow of magic building up as the artifact was uncovered.

“I hope that you know what you are doing. The level of the magic in that thing is getting stronger. Ummm … I will just toddle along back to the house. The far side of the house.

“Just tell me when you have it all under control, OK?”

I was just getting around the corner of the house when the device began to emit high pitched squeaking noises that I recognized all too well. Conduit crystals or not, it was emitting a powerful Lemming Call!

In mere moments, I heard the patter of tiny feet at the cliff top! The Lemming Stampede was beginning!

Nayomi walked in device in hand “I got it out. Now to crack it open to get its contents”

My magic managed to get the door shut on the noses of the first wave of little furry garden destroyers before they could get into the house! There was the scrabbling of tiny claws and paws as the little monsters swarmed the door.
I was barely in time, getting the windows shut! Little black noses and brown furry faces pressed against the glass. I could hear them gnawing on the house’s decorative ivy.

This was far worse than the Lemming stampede of two years back!

Nayomi just calmly sat to a table and began to work on the still chirping device.

“Sounds like you’ve got a lot to deal with out there!” Nayomi laughed, smashing the end of the tube to silence it.

Watching through the glass of the window, I saw it happen. Almost as one, the brigade of furry vegetable destruction looked at each other. I will swear that they nodded mass agreement. They fell away from the window. The door scrabbling stopped.

I yanked the door open to see a horde of brown fuzzy butts headed for the remains of my garden!

Dashing out, my blue magic lifted the little chisel fanged vegetarians en massé and shifted them into the forest. Behind me, I heard Nayomi laughing so hard that she was having trouble staying upright.

Then I saw what she had already seen. The swarm had returned from the forest. Under the cover of sun dried grass they had gained access to the garden. They were disposing of my fallen maize, rooting up my beets and carrots and gnawing on the last of the potatoes. There were no survivors. Again.

I turned about in defeat and saw bare ruined stems on the bare walls where my cute ivy covered cottage once stood. Discouraged, I drooped back into the house.

Nayomi watched as I began packing a few of my most important possessions.

Nayomi stepped outside and spread her bat wings. She extended her hand forward. The sun blacked out almost like an eclipse. A ball of darkness formed in her hand and her eyes glowed blood red. “By my power I raise these fallen plants to once again live as shadows! I banish these creatures to the furthest depths of the forest!”

The small fuzzy creatures all sank into the ground and the plants stood up again but were a darker color than they used to be. Nayomi let down her hand. The sky and her eyes returned to their normal color. She walked back inside.

“There! A garden no one else in this world will ever have,” the changeling smiled.

When I heard Nayomi’s words outside and then what she said as she came in, I had to charge out and look!

Despite the darker color, the garden was intact! There was no sign of Maize Crater or of the lemming stampede and destruction. Even the ivy on the house was back to almost normal. It was all that same shadowed color.
I turned to thank Nayomi. She seemd to be very pleased with herself, and rightly so. “Thank you, Nayomi. It appears that you being Queen of Shadows is not a mere title.

“Will the produce from these Shadow plants be wholesome for ordinary ponies?”

“The times I tested it, it just makes food taste the opposite of what it normally would,” she smiled. “And no, the Queen of Shadows isn’t just a title. My magical ability was given a massive boost when I gained my power.”

Giving a sideways glance at the now flourishing garden where once the Lemmings ruled, I gave a bit of a laugh. “The taste will be opposite? Like Sour instead of Sweet?

“Oh, joy. I have an entirely new thing in garden disast … Humm … You know, if these plants breed true, this could make for some fascinating new flavors and some great practical jokes!”

“They’ll breed. I just replaced the plant with its shadow. It won’t cast a shadow anymore.”

I began to whistle tunelessly as I hoofed my beard with a fore hoof while thinking. Shadow plants? Funny flavors? Maybe Nayomi had just done me the favor that I needed, garden-wise.

I had to wonder how the lemmings would react to the shadow plants?

A natural shadow drifted across my garden. Looking up, I saw a pair of pegassi looking down over the edge of the cloud. I recognized them. They should be called the flying jackasses. Remember the accident with the “malfunctioning” lightning core?”

You guessed it. The same two. I could see their grins from here.

“I can tell you don’t like them very much” Nayomi said, walking outside. “You want me to take care of them for you dad?” Nayomi placed a hoof on my shoulder.

I was hit by an inspiration of sorts. A wicked one. I covered Nayomi’s hoof with my own in acceptance of her offer.

“Yes, my dear. I do not want them HURT, just hugely embarrassed. If any equipment from the weather factory that they have along should be wrecked in a way that they will have to PAY for, that would be the icing on the cake!”
I took another look up at the flying jackasses and added, “I wonder if those fools can stay up on a Shadow cloud?”

“I can’t take over the cloud but the under side of a cloud is a shadow.”

Nayomi disappeared, reappearing under the cloud. The cloud became darker at the bottom and, without them noticing, tendrils of shadow gripped their legs.

I was watching this delightful display of Shadow Magic with interest. New things always fascinate me. Especially useful new things. It was looking as though the flying jackasses were about to find out just how useful shadow magic might be, though I doubted that they were going to appreciate the lesson.

Nayomi appeared on the cloud behind them in a pegasus form.

“Well hello there,” she said in a very angry tone. “I see you’re trying to mess with my father again. That’s a mistake!”

I had to grin. This was getting just too good. A daughter who is not only a Changeling Queen but a mistress of Shadow Magic? I had to wonder what was in store for the flying jackass twins. It really looked like Nayomi had the situation in hoof.

If I was sure how Shadow Corn would work, I would have made some popcorn to nibble on while I watched the Shadow-Cloud Theater!

"You are currently standing on a cloud I have control of. You cannot escape due to my magic holding you in place. I see you brought a weather pony toy. It looks expensive. I wonder how the head pegasi would feel if you came back without it?”

The item started sinking into her shadow, completely disappearing.
“Now, leave here and let my father alone!”

She released the flying jackasses from the cloud. They were now free able to fly away.

Did they? Really now, serious stupids must have run in their families. I mean, even if they were pegassi, they did not seem smart enough to fly, so the stupids had to run.

Except that they didn’t even do that. They stood on that cloud, facing Nayomi and demanded, “Give us back that hail controller! Equipment like that is really tricky to use safely! You have to have Thunder-head Technician training to even be allowed to use it!”

While the flying jackass twins were yapping at Nayomi, the shadowed bottom of the cloud was vanishing quietly out from under them. Pretty soon, the cloud was too thin to make a shadow of its own.

As Nayomi grinned, two pegassi, who should have had the sense to fly away earlier, suddenly fell through the tiny wisp of cloud left under them.
Nayomi dropped the machine out of the bottom of the cloud, letting it fall and smash on the ground.

The jackass twins fell slower than the hail-controller because, caught by surprise, they were fluttering and flopping as they tried to regain control. Parts of the machine were still bouncing about as the two idiots landed in my garden. One went in nose first, the other, tail first.

A true virtue of the Shadow Garden showed at once. Not so much as a leaf of lettuce was damaged. Only the pride of pegassi that failed to fly … Oh, and their hail-controller of course!

Some parts glittered and sparkled in the sun. Seeing them, I called up to Nayomi who was gliding gently down, the way that a pegasus should, “Nayomi! Look! That thing was full of conduit crystals!”

She was down almost instantly, examining the wreckage.

Nayomi flew over to where I was. “Not conduit crystals, some kind of ice crystal. C Crystals are more for unicorns and alicorns than pegasi,” she said, shifting back to her normal form.

Slightly crestfallen, I replied, “Still, if they have a form of magic that a pegasus can use, maybe they have other uses too.”

Ass (not a mistake) I was speaking I was hitching my Rom pulling harness to the rear hooves of old faceful (of dirt). I gave a steady heave and the (not) flying jackass came out of the garden and was dragged rear first over to my lawn.

The other one could see what I was up to but still needed help getting out of the hole he was stuck in. I curled my lip in disdainful amusement as he struggled helplessly.

Nayomi was looking on at his struggles a big grin showing all of her Changeling fangs. It looked for all the world as if he was being held helplessly down in the hole by his own shadow.

“You sure you don’t want me to take care of these fools for you father?” She cracked her knuckles and licked her fangs almost seductively.

Seeing the looks of horror dawning on the faces of the flying jackass twins, I nudged Nayomi gently as I said, “I think that is your best switch yet, Nay. Look at those jerks. They really think that you are a Changeling Queen!

“I think that you may be ready with your disguise act by the Ponyville Fair!” I shifted my glance to the fallen ones.

They still looked scared.

I pointed a hoof at them. “You actually have them convinced. You will be the best villain that the play has ever had!”

Nayomi, true to what I had learned of her and her own statements, switched “back” to a silvery colored unicorn. She sat down and rolled, she was laughing so hard.

She really was a terrific actress.

“Gullible idiots. That will teach you to mess with my father!”

She released her two captives with, “Now if you two actually know how to fly, leave and don’t come back!”

Freed of the shadow-grip holding them, the two pegassi took off in a surprisingly powerful fluttering of wings. They were mere specks in no time flat.
I wandered over to the garden area and gathered up the fragments of the weather controller. As Nayomi watched, I made a careful sweep with tuned magic to get every bit of the broken machine.

Inside, I began sorting bits and pieces until I found the name plate:
Jovan Manufacturing / Model XXIV Ice Condition Device: Snow, Sleet, Hail / Serial # 005b1-7j649 / WARNING: DO NOT ACTIVATE WITHOUT AT LEAST A THUNDERHEAD OPERATIONS LICENSE!!

I used my horn to go onto the Magic-Net. “Hello, Is this Cloudsdale Weather Operations? I would like to report finding a lost and severely damaged Jovan Ice Condition Device. - - - Yes, I can hold!”

I was grinning ear to ear, and with the length of a donkey’s jaw, that is a wide grin indeed.

“What, you say your inventory shows none out? I have the name plate right here. Umm - - Model? Oh, XXIV - - Serial number? A moment please while I get the piece and look. Oh, here it is! #005b1-7j649. It’s in your Winter Warehouse?

“Sorry to have bothered you. I will just get the Equestrian Daily News photographers and reporters here. I am sure that they will be interest …” I broke the connection.

I saw Nayomi’s questioning look and said, “It was just a Magic-Net call. They are easy. The system was designed so that even older foals can use it. It works like this …” I began to show her how to make a Magic-Net call.
I saw her eyes light up as she realized the simplicity of the system. Apparently, it was not used in her home dimensions.

“I heard there was a rare gem in a town in a dimension like this. Is this the place?” Nayomi asked, walking over to the machine and inspecting the crystals.

“I have no idea if they are rare where you come from, Nayomi,” I said, looking over her shoulder. “I was hasty in thinking that they might be conduit crystals. These appear to be nothing but common force crystallized water.”

I scooped up a smaller one and held it to the light. “Yep, force crystallized water. Safe as a house so long as you keep it away from getting wet or hitting it with a hammer.”

I saw Nayomi’s ears prick up at the mention of exceptions to safety. I went on, “When they first came out with them, their durability and sparkle made them popular costume jewelry, right up to the Countess Snootinair incident. She had a fancy necklace made out of them. Sparkled like mad in the sun, the survivors said.

“The party was in the South Garden. It was hot. Mid August. She sweated. A lot. The necklace got damp. They found what was left of her head in the North Drawing Room wall. Most of the South Garden was a crater. Mansion had to be completely rebuilt.”

I smiled a bit at the memory. “I never did like her. She kept trying to get the Rom tossed out of the fairs. The Rom are like my children.” Pausing thoughtfully, I added truthfully, “Come to think, most of them are related to me nowadays. It has been 800 years, give or take.”

Nayomi was giggling.

“Aaah dangerous. I can appreciate that. Now how about those gems in town? The big red crystals under heavy guard at all hours? They worth anything?”

Nayomi gave a sweet innocent smile, despite her intentions being known.
I mildly scratched behind an ear. “Your arrival was not so random as you would like me to believe, was it? No need to lie about it. You can’t.” I gave her a long, appraising look. “Thing is, you are no threat to my Celestia or Luna. You landed quite a ways off target. You want the Crystal Empire, run by relatives and friends of theirs but not Equestria.”

I tilted my head and looked Nayomi in the eye. “I told you earlier that you being dishonest would keep the other ponies on their toes. Still true. Celestia and Luna will know it, though. Could make your trip trickier.

“I’d be disappointed if you wanted to involve my Rom or any other in your shenanigans. That’s all.”

“No need to worry I’m a solo player. I wont get anyone of your kids in trouble. In fact no one will ever know it was me who took them, well except you of course.”

The changeling gave a slight smile “And I was never dishonest. I did land here accidentally. Those gems just happened to be in this dimension, so I’m moving them up the list.”

I think, from hearing that, that Nayomi was catching on to the twisted way that I tend to think. I pointed to the water crystals and suggested, “Scatter a few of these just over there, beyond the garden, near the cliff. The machine housing too. I will keep the name plate here. That will satisfy the Weather Factory observers that are going to be out here real soon.”

I cheerfully packed the rest of the crystals into a valise for Nayomi. “You will very likely find these useful in your avocation, my dear. Use them with care. If you need more at anytime, just call.”

Nayomi accepted the bag with a quizzical expression.
I answered the unspoken question while grinning. “You have not lied to me. I do know that. I have not lied to you either. Neither of us is very honest in certain other ways. It helps to keep life interesting.”

I sobered some and added, “After living more than 3000 years, it can take some strange turns to do that.”

“I’ll be back in a few days. You’ll probably hear about it before I get here. Take care,” she said smiling, as she was slowly sinking into the shadow of the house.

I think that Nayomi was surprised to feel my hoof on her shoulder as she was fading away. “I will see you then, my dear. Do not forget, I do want you to be our villain at the Ponyville fair. I think that you will enjoy the role.”

Turning, I saw what I had hoped for. Two flights of pegassi converging on my place. One, judging by the work uniforms was the Cloudsdale Weather Factory group.

The other? Cameras and microphones. The news photographers and interviewers that I had thoughtlessly called.

SOMEPONIES besides me were going to regret letting that machine out of the Winter Warehouse …

The End