Monster is as Monster Does
Chapter 39: First Blood, Bad Blood
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One week Later
Mentally, I knew Tzu was handling almost all of the logistics. In every other regard, I was exhausted. Every day was filled with inspections and meetings and press events and I wanted to get just one more hour of sleep.
Taking Abaddon everywhere as a sign of strength had slowed things down a little, allowing me to catch quick naps to make up for only stealing three hours or so each night for a week.
"Mistress, we've arrived," Tzu stated gently, having gotten snapped at a few times already.
"Which one is this?" I groaned without moving.
"The Cloudsdale light skirmishers," Tzu reminded me, though I had no idea if I'd ever heard of them before. There were so many units being organized all over the place.
I dragged myself up and let Abby clean up my appearance before groggily following Tzu onto the deck.
I wasn't waiting long before three pegasi landed nearby to begin the meeting.
"Your highness," the middle one greeted formally.
"Please, relax. I need to know you can fight, not how well you've practiced your manners," I chided playfully. It was a calculated tactic to put them at ease while focusing on the point of my visit. Tzu had given me a list of quips like this to memorize before Jay and that damn ship had even passed the horizon.
"Of course," the same one agreed with a small bow, "We've prepared a demonstration if you like."
"Time is of the essence, will this take more time than one of my evaluators?" I asked, losing the friendly tone.
"No ma'am, it should only take a few minutes," the one on the left insisted.
"Then let's see," I prompted, sending them away to begin their show.
What followed was an airshow not unlike a Wonderbolts performance, though Tzu's considering look stifled my growing anger.
"Is this a waste of time?" I asked quietly.
"Their function is to harass and distract enemy flyers, so no," Tzu replied.
"Are they passable?" I continued.
"More than, I'm happy to say. This puts us a good six percent further along than projected," Tzu answered. He seemed to be enjoying this, somehow.
I was angry because I was tired. I knew that. But the stress of the situation stole what enjoyment could be gleaned from my pitiable sleep schedule.
"Then I'm going back to sleep," I decided, "Let them know the usual shit."
I turned away from the show to enter through the passage atop the leviathan, only for something roughly my size to collide with my chest and stagger me.
I turned in alarm, but was sluggish and failed to identify the creature before the deck pitched violently and I was thrown towards the passage.
Tzu managed to catch me and keep me from breaking anything in the impact, but any communication was impossible as I pressed my hooves to my ears to block some of the skull splitting sound that erupted all around me.
From what I could tell, Abaddon was charging after the mysterious creature faster than I'd ever seen him move. He was bellowing in fury and all of his cannons were firing as fast as they could.
Due to where we were on the deck, I got a dusting of the acrid chemicals from every flaming projectile he launched. It burned my skin, but my eyes were fine and helped me identify the target of his rage.
It was Chrysalis, flying just as fast as her insectoid wings could manage while she tried to dodge the projectiles sent her way.
When the enforcers caught up to her, she vanished in a green tinted flash of teleportation.
Jay was going to be pissed, but now I had to worry about the damage done by his forces in this failed attempt to kill the changeling queen.
Tartarus. She came from Tartarus.
"Oh shit! Tzu, we have to make sure Tartarus isn't falling!" I urged, banishing all of my lethargy as adrenaline flooded my veins.
Tzu reestablished the portal disrupted by Abaddon's charge, allowing me to lead a host of enforcers through in an ad hoc response force.
The palace guards were outnumbered fifteen to one, but they were only fighting changelings and they were holding for now.
I didn't get the chance to even pretend I was more than a tagalong, the enforcers charged and mercilessly slaughtered the changelings before I could say anything.
From what I was able to gather from Harry, no demons had aided the changelings in their assault on the palace.
Once all of the changelings were dead, the matter was considered closed by those that had participated in the fight.
"Jay won't be happy that Chrysalis is free again," I noted.
"No, he won't. What's worse is that she was carrying something. Did you see the pack she was carrying? It was large on her frame, something worth slowing herself down for," Tzu added.
I actually hadn't seen that she was carrying anything, but took his word for it.
Perspective Change: Chrysalis
It was an odd thing, how the mind fixated on one fragment of a situation when all else was too much to deal with. In my case, it was that there was dirt in my left eye.
There was dirt in my eye because I was on my side with my eyes open and body limp.
I could blink. In theory.
One hoof moved to feel for my treasure, finding it safely secured in its bag.
I'd made it out.
And the proof was that there was dirt in my eye.
After a few more minutes and another couple checks to be sure I still had the bone, I prioritized blinking my eye clean before getting up and setting off to start work on my new plan.
What changelings I'd amassed before would be dead by now, so a new hive would be required. More than that, I would need drones that could survive or even beat His soldiers.
Step one was to build a fresh hive, step two was breeding stronger drones, and step three would be finding the rest of the skeleton.
Perspective Change: Jekyll
"Anyone waiting for you back on shore?" I asked idly as I leaned on the wheel, dutifully providing the shade I had promised before we set out.
"My parents," Notepad responded with a shrug.
"Oh? What do they do for a living?" I continued, my words devoid of any motive beyond passing the time.
"My pops is a reporter like me… or at least like I thought I was," Notepad sighed.
"Still upset over being dragged in as a propagandist, I see. If it makes you feel any better, you can keep more honest records to publish later," I allowed, making Notepad look up in mild surprise.
"Why? How does that help you?" He wondered.
"It doesn't," I replied.
"Then why let me undermine your narrative?" He pressed.
I grinned, "Because it won't matter by then. Once the story has served its purpose, it dies. No one cares if you later say that it was lies, they've forgotten most of it and already acted on the emotions the lie inspired. Even if you give it enough vitriol to stir their anger, I don't need to be concerned about them."
Notepad looked away once more, his bias confirmed. I was the evil warlord he was expecting.
"Quill!" I declared, finally matching his features with the reporters I'd spied on, "Ink Quill is your father."
"That's right. Do I want to know why you know that?"
"I keep tabs on things," I offered with a shrug.
"You 'keep tabs on things'? It sounds more like a threat from down here," Notepad countered.
I just shrugged again, "Yeah, I get that a lot."
Watching him squirm from my refusal to elaborate on that made for good entertainment while it lasted, but time was starting to steal his fear of the demons on board and he soon tried to make conversation with one of them.
I played at disinterest, but eavesdropped shamelessly. Notepad was absolutely not getting his way with the demons, he was being mocked and used. He thought he was striking an advantageous deal, but he wasn't talking to the right kind of demon to ever have a chance at that.
They promised him protection and friendship in exchange for him letting them lightly torment him for his screams. Nothing damaging, but he wouldn't have a good time once they got bored of twisting his ears. Notepad wasn't knowledgeable enough about demons to even know this was what he was agreeing to.
I could step in and save him from this, Luna would. Luna would want me to as well. From a logical standpoint, it was neutral; helping him would paint me in a better light in his mind and possibly influence his writings, ignoring his plight would further emphasize the cruelty and violence brought by Equestria's erstwhile allies. Both served my purposes.
Perspective Change: Luna
The Southern Edge of The Western Forest
I'd seen Jay ride Abaddon before, but I'd never been aboard the leviathan as he ran before today. Now we seemed to be running all over the country as I tried to track Chrysalis's magic. The lurching of the deck wasn't helping either my concentration or my stomach, but this was something that had to be done.
"Nothing here either," Tzu reported as we arrived at the sixth of Chrysalis's teleport destinations. Just as I would have done, she chained together a series of teleports to throw off pursuit. Each could only be traced from the origin point, forcing us to chase each one down.
"This is the last of the set, she is here," I declared, "Abby, give us a stomp."
"With pleasure," Abaddon growled from the secondary beside Tzu and myself as tendrils fixed to my legs and locked me in place.
The world tilted for a moment before a thunderous crash collapsed any underground passages in the area.
"We're awfully close to the Badlands," Tzu noted, "The soil is loose. Unless there's a lot of rock beneath us, we should be able to see fresh wadis forming from any collapsing tunnels."
I saw nothing of the sort.
"Hit it again," I ordered, "Harder."
The impact was far more violent this time, but the result was the same.
"How many Romeos do we have on board? Send them all out, search in all directions. Do not lose this changeling," I demanded.
"It's already being done," Tzu replied.
"Burn the forest down, kill everything," I seethed.
Abaddon froze. He had been tilting left and right as he panned his head back and forth, now he was totally still.
"We're not going to do that," Tzu stated, "We can see through changeling disguises and are extremely thorough, there's no reason to also cause an ecological disaster."
"Kinda darkside too," Abaddon added.
I took a breath and quelled my anger. They were right. Either they would find Chrysalis and kill her or we would finish her off during our next confrontation.
"Thank you, my friends. I shall be taking tomorrow off, this lack of sleep is making me hateful," I decided.
"I'll proxy for you and have a report ready," Tzu agreed.
"I just hope Jay can buy us enough time to finish the preparations," I sighed.
Perspective Change: Jekyll
My lookout missed it, the very tips of the masts appearing at the horizon with the last rays of sunlight. I didn't blame the demon, but I had him hanged for neglect anyway. Standards and all.
"Be silent and make ready the ship," I hissed.
"Rethefipo, wegohasofuwithe," Fisto added. Somehow, his underlings understood perfectly and began pouring oil pots across the railings and painting it on the mast. Given the 'fi' in there, I assumed these were meant to be set on fire. I approved of the showdemonship.
It was almost midnight by the time we got close enough to them to begin the fight.
"Turn your ships around, you fools.
Turn around and run.
This ship sure wants a battle.
And it knows that you're outgunned.
Yes, this ship is hunting you.
We'll drag you all to Hell.
She's called Belial's Bane.
And demons run her sails."
I knew how sound carried over water and ensured I was just loud enough for them to hear. The alarm bells sounded seconds later, though the zebras and gryphons on deck were still trying to find us in the dark.
I chose to make it easier for them, since they were having so much difficulty and all. My hand closed around Cataclysm's handle, feeding it power and setting the blade alight before it left the scabbard. I drew my flaming sword and struck the railing to my right, giving the allied sailors a perfect view of my ship's outline and those on her deck.
The demons laughed at their fear, which probably didn't help the mortal crews.
I counted fifteen ships, all frigate class or larger, all warships loaded with troops.
"Oars out," I ordered, though the wind was from off our port side, "I want speed."
"Is this the time where I go hide?" Notepad asked quietly, his voice shaking a little less than the rest of him.
"If you can," I replied, happy to see that the demons had set the steel oars on fire too.
The gryphons were still trying to set up and load their rifles for a volley when I called the oars back in and slammed into the first ship. As expected, they'd been trying to get out of our path and only lost about a quarter of the starboard side. It was fine, that wasn't a survivable amount of damage.
"Open the swingers," I ordered. A rope was cut, causing a large blacksmithing anvil to fall behind the mast until the chains binding it snapped taut and in turn opened the long blades that had been hanging to either side of the ship.
These blades weren't particularly sharp, but there was a lot of force behind them and they were devastating to any ship we skimmed beside. Not enough to sink, they were too high for that, but enough to disable a good portion of the top deck.
I cranked the wheel hard to port and looped around the back of our first kill to angle towards another of the ships.
The crack of gunfire started sounding, but without any pattern and without the massive number of accompanying pings. They were shooting at will rather than in ordered volleys, probably for the best.
A sweep of the starboard blade across the hull of my next target put a damper on the number of incoming bullets.
"I think we can bring out the main weapons now," I allowed.
"Rotheca, yobebu!" Fisto ordered, prompting the gunports to open and our cannons to roll out.
"Still setting the balls on fire?" I mused.
"Yoknoit," Fisto laughed.
"About as much as I know you hate my nickname for you," I agreed, "Give them one."
Wooden ships lacquered their beams to waterproof them, a necessity lest the ship rot out from under the crew. It also made them incredibly flammable.
That burning cannonball had the entire ship engulfed less than a minute after impact, trapping the crew and all the soldiers aboard between death by drowning and death by immolation. Even the gryphons would die out here, being too far to just fly home.
The remaining thirteen ships scattered, but rallied and attempted to surround us. I let them succeed, for now.
Bullets and spells began to pour in, occasionally dropping a demon for the few seconds it would take for that same demon to regenerate and walk back through the portal below deck and return to his post. Yes, I was cheating.
"Fisto, take the wheel and make them hurt. I'm gonna go break some things," I instructed, waiting for the demon to have full control over the ship before I took to the air and hid myself in the darkness and gunsmoke.
I landed silently on the deck of one of the ships and crushed the skull of the nearest minotaur sailor with one hand. Not that he'd turned and seen me yet, but he might have.
Now totally undetected, I slipped onto the deck behind the ragged looking gunline they had managed to form.
Three swings of Cataclysm notched and felled the mast right onto them before it's lines broke and it went over the side.
"Oops, did you boys need that?" I mocked before falling backwards over the side and vanishing below the waves. The outsides of the gunline had been missed by the mast, but also denied any retribution.
I ripped the rudder off the next one, then pushed it to cause a collision with another ship.
My third target had some extra gold trim on the side, previously invisible due to the lack of light. I took this to mean that it was the flagship of this fleet and hauled myself onto the deck for a fight.
"It's him."
"Jekyll himself?"
"I just wanted the better food."
"Surrender your sailors, soldiers, and ships. Do this and they will be treated with dignity until the end of the war. Cross me and I will leave none alive to tell of your folly," I offered.
"We have you outnumbered thirteen to one, though some aren't in peak condition any longer," the poofiest of the gryphons countered. At least he had the sense to speak instead of attacking like an idiot.
"Against my ironside, you have nothing. You can't sink her and you can't take her, you will all die," I insisted.
"An ironside? You managed to make a seaworthy ironside? That explains the fire. I must still reject your terms," the commodore responded with a shake of his head, causing several of his own crew to stare at him in dismay.
"A show then, order one of yours to ram mine," I allowed, "It will not be stopped before impact."
"As you say," the commodore agreed, signaling a minotaur holding a shuttered lantern.
The signal was relayed and one of the undamaged ships pulled out of formation to ram the starboard side of my ship.
The impact unfooted everyone on both ships, but the demons recovered near instantly and began to pour across to butcher everyone in the offending vessel. They even burned it down before returning to their posts.
"I do make every effort to be reasonable, let it not be said otherwise," I declared as I turned away from the burning, bloody ship to face Commodore Elric Von Gliddenshiff, third of his name.
He was pointing a pistol at me, no doubt loaded with a cure bullet.
I watched the hammer fall, the flint catch the powder in the flash pan. I drew my sword as the bullet left the barrel, angled my blade as it closed the distance between us, and pushed as the bullet struck.
As far as any of the crew had seen, I had drawn my sword and slapped the bullet back at the one who had fired it. They had not seen incorrectly, as their commodore fell onto his right side with a hole drilled through his skull by his own deflected shot.
"That worked better than expected, must have been a steel ball instead of lead," I commented to myself.
"We surrender," one of the crew declared as he dropped his weapon and put his hands above his head.
"I know," I replied, "Signal it to your peers."
"Will we be allowed to live? Even after the Commodore attacked you?" The same crew member asked.
I looked at the gryphon and considered the question. I could kill them all and have their ships sent back as a message or keep the prisoners and the ships for materiel and leverage.
"Yes, you're worth more to me alive," I decided, "You will live out the remainder of this war in my dungeon, but you will be fed and provided for. If your friend's comment about food was any indication, your living standards may improve."
The signal light flashed with newfound urgency, quelling the fight from the rest of the Allied ships. I didn't even have to fly back to my own ship, I was able to simply hop up to the railing once the one I was on pulled alongside my larger flagship.
"Demons of Tartarus, my subjects, the first victory of this war is ours. These sailors are now my prisoners, but their ships are yours to sail under my flag," I announced to a general cheer.
Gryphons, minotaurs, and zebras filed off the ships as they moored beside the Bane, forming an orderly line below deck and through a portal into Tartarus. The palace guards took them from there and herded them into the cells beneath the palace.
Really, the worst part of it for them was being pushed past the first cells in the dungeon. Another holdover from Belial I'd never gotten around to dealing with, the first cell on either side were packed with so many bloats that the air literally greened on that end of the first cellblock. It served as a barrier to any trying to escape through the door.
It was kinda cruel to the bloats, as they only stank because they were too densely packed to maintain themselves. They suffered endlessly for crimes no one remembered, too useful to free at this point.
Once past the initial cells, I stopped the prisoners and made an announcement.
"All cells beyond this point are unlocked and shall remain so as long as you are civil. Food will be provided thrice daily, water piped into all the cells, and bedding can already be found inside. I encourage you to explore the prison and map your findings, as I haven't bothered to find out what's down here," I began.
A few looked at each other and made gestures of confusion and slight fear. One pair of zebras looked excited at the prospect of exploring the prison, but they were alone in this.
"If you find a passage deeper into the dungeon, let a guard know immediately. Do not go down any stairs, anything down there is there for a reason. Any concerns may also be brought to a guard, though I think you'll find your time here to be more comfortable than expected," I concluded.
"Elder, is there anywhere we can exercise?" A gryphon asked, getting looks from the other races present but no judgement from his own kind.
"I'm told that there are several open spaces for such activities, though I don't know where any are. This prison is a third of the size of Minos, at best estimate," I offered with a shrug.
"Thank you, elder," a minotaur responded, clearly attempting to affect a respectful tone with the gryphon honorific.
"Thank all of you for choosing this path, I didn't want this war either. It will fall to you to educate all further captives on how the prison works," I replied with a nod, "And don't bother with escape, the very air outside will kill you."
I left them with that as I swept out of the prison and back to my ship, finding that it was now in the center of a small fleet.
If we waited a day, the ships we stole from Baltimare might even catch up to us.
Perspective Change: Luna
Canterlot, the next morning
"I had planned on taking today off," I grumbled.
Tzu opened his mouth to offer platitudes and apologies, but was stopped from speaking when the door on the other side of the meeting room opened to admit a white unicorn.
"Captain Armor," I greeted, "What urgent matter has prompted you to request my presence so… urgently? Ugh, I said that twice. Apologies, I'm still a little groggy."
Captain Shining Armor gave Tzu a sharp look before speaking, "I would rather we were actually alone for this, it is a pony matter."
I nodded to Tzu, confirming that I would be fine without him for this. I did not dismiss Fang from where he was lurking, this smelled like a trap.
Once Tzu was gone, Armor finally relaxed.
"I've had the scribes and remaining mages going through the archives for any of Princess Celestia's secret projects that may help us. She seems to have tried everything to defeat Jekyll. What they've uncovered is why I've requested this meeting," he began.
"You have my attention, I was once attacked with one of her secret weapons," I replied.
"I heard about that, this one is quite different. No mages, just alchemy. A sort of serum to make the subject stronger and faster, possibly resistant to the powers of Jekyll's blood," Armor continued.
"And the other side of the bit? If this was effective, it would be in common use among the guards," I pointed out.
"The pony injected only lives for a few weeks. It burns out their bodies and they die," Armor confessed.
"No, I suspect there is more you are either hiding or ignorant about. Tia has plenty of zealots that would trade their lives for even a second of the power you describe, so long as they had a chance of killing Jay," I asserted.
Shining Armor didn't have an answer for that, he simply looked stunned for a moment and produced the documentation he had. I granted him the time to look through it, but suspected that the true flaw in the serum was purged from the record.
In fact, my time going through countless reports from the Indias made the discrepancy obvious to me.
"I don't see anything missing," Armor noted.
"Perhaps you should read page twenty-nine again," I hinted, watching him flip through the notes yet again before freezing and slowly turning the pages while keenly looking at the page numbers.
"There is no page twenty-nine. It's missing, and so are five more," he realized, "How did you see that?"
"I read a great many reports every single day, though in fairness I only noticed the one page. Congratulations on besting your constipation, by the way," I replied as I stood, "This superpony project is shelved until the true scope of the flaws can be evaluated. There will be no trials on live ponies. On an unrelated note, I need to have some reports left out of my daily briefings."
"Understood, your Highness," Armor agreed.
"Tzu, do I recall another appointment being scheduled for today?" I asked, summoning the enforcer, "Captain, you may remain if you wish."
"Yes, an individual named Crimson. I don't have any records of him in the city census, but Celestia has always made time for him," Tzu responded.
"Very well, I shall see what it is he does for our nation," I allowed.
"Good choice," a different voice commented as something that wasn't a pony walked into the room through the door behind Shining Armor.
"I am given to understand that we have a truce," I warned, standing from the table and bracing for an attack.
"Not with me. Not. At. All," the mad bioweapon replied with a cruel grin, "Shame you don't have any enforcers worth risking, I'd hate to see little Tzu here converted to our side with all his knowledge of your plans."
"I have Fang," I corrected, causing Crimson's grin to falter the moment before a certain insane fleshy mass of sharp edges collided with him, "Captain Armor, kindly exit the room via the door behind me."
"Yes, Princess," he responded, wisely not getting himself killed just yet.
I unwisely remained to aid Fang in this duel.
The two pulled away from one another, each wearing the same coloration to their skin and same dental features. An obvious ploy by Crimson to stop me from interfering.
Shame he was only psychopathic, he lacked the mania of the real Fang. Both looked at me as I charged a suitably powerful flame blast, though I lacked the specialty to turn it into a proper sunbeam. The real Fang grinned, his eyes wide with the excitement of proving his value.
I blasted the one that only looked angry.
"Mommy, why?" A badly burned real Fang asked.
"Oh shit," I swore as I attempted to correct my error. Crimson was better than I expected, but he had known Fang for much longer than I had.
Crimson laughed as he moved to finish off Fang, but his claws were stopped by those of another. Of all the entities in the whole world, Tzu had come to the defense of his addled brother.
Tzu was an enforcer. One of the deadliest melee combatants to ever exist. This was often lost on me, given his secretarial role. It was impossible to make that mistake now.
Tzu never stopped talking, preventing Crimson from even attempting to copy his appearance. This helped, but it wasn't enough. Ensuring that I knew who to attack was a high priority, but he still had to at least hold his own.
As ferocious as Tzu was showing himself to be, Crimson had once been a Gamma and thus specialized in fighting. Tzu was getting hit ten times for every one he landed, he was dying and I couldn't get a clear shot.
"Of all the people to come get me for help, I didn't expect Shiny. Not in a million lifetimes," a voice I had no hope of hearing stated, abruptly halting the combat.
Jay strode into the room in his full armor, carrying his sword on his belt and his hammer in his hand.
"Well, isn't this interesting," Crimson mocked.
"Gamma thirty-one dash four, absent from roster for a cool five months. Good job being the poster child for exactly why I keep you all on such a short leash," Jay retorted, making Crimson bristle.
The rogue growled angrily before bolting back out the door he had entered through, fleeing from the fight now that Jay was here.
"Bitch ass coward," Jay taunted, though he didn't raise his voice to do so. We all knew that he didn't need to.
"Jay, Fang's hurt," I urged as I rushed to help my personal guard.
Fang flinched when I knelt beside him, squeezing his eyes shut rather than look at me.
"Oh Fang, I'm so sorry. I meant to burn that Crimson bastard," I apologized as I did what I could to heal his wounds. Wounds I had inflicted.
Fang curled in on himself before I was done, sobbing tears of highly dangerous blood. He still let me turn his head and wipe his tears away with a fetlock.
"You don't trust me," he whimpered.
"Of course I do," I soothed.
"NO!" he bellowed, pushing me away and throwing himself up to land on his feet, "NOT trusted. FANG is FANG. Best KILLER. UNSTOPPABLE. No traitor can beat me, no thing, no monster, no rain, no high chaplain, no nobody. YOU DIDN'T LET ME KILL!"
I took a step back.
"I've never seen you fight, I didn't know. I'm sorry, I won't interfere again," I apologized further.
Fang's manic glare shifted to Jay, "Father, is my legend forgotten?"
The sudden shift in tone and accent to one of proper aristocracy should not have caught me as off guard as it did.
"Hallucinations don't count," Jay replied.
"whynot? THey ShoulD," Fang asserted, his voice wavering unsteadily.
"Fang, dear, let's get out of here and get you some food to bring your strength back," I suggested, hoping to distract and calm Fang before he completely lost control of himself.
"Okay Mommy," Fang agreed with a happy grin as he bounded to my side.
"Come with us, Jay, I haven't seen you in ages and I'd love to hear how the naval war is going," I instructed.
"It's on my walk back anyway," Jay replied as he fell in on my other side and immediately got slapped by Fang.
"Two inches further forward, pervert," Fang growled.
"I'm at her damn shoulder, you fucking psycho," Jay retorted.
"Two inches forward," Fang repeated.
Jay took a half step forward and gave Fang an expectant look.
"That was three inches," Fang stated, his tone disapproving and highly critical.
Jay leaned back slightly.
"Okay, now we can go get yum yums," Fang declared.
"Are you people insane? That was the scariest thing I've ever seen, how could you even think of just bucking off to get lunch right now?"
"Oh, sorry, forgot my manners. Let me try that again," Jay requested as we all turned towards a previously ignored Captain Armor. I hadn't even known he was in the room, "Yo Shiny, shit's sorted for now so we're gonna snag a bite real quick. You want anything while we're going that way?"
"That was meaner than it needed to be," I chided, "Captain, nopony is seriously injured. It may seem extreme, but this is upsettingly normal for us at this point. As such, we're treating our wounded and collaborating to plan our next moves."
"Much better phrasing, mistress," Tzu agreed as he considered a part of himself that was lying on the floor.
"Leave it for the cleaners and just come stock up with the rest of us, I need to check you anyway," Jay offered, reminding me that Tzu had risked contamination by saving Fang.
"It wouldn't matter, I'm not going anywhere," Tzu declared, though he was already obeying and joining our group.
"Captain, would you care to accompany us as well? Tartarus and Equestria are allies in this war, you will be quite safe," I offered.
"Perhaps next time, your Highness," he replied, likely thinking nobody had noticed his momentary glance at the company I kept. I chose not to take offense.
"Then my orders are to lock this room down until our cleaning crew arrives and deals with the mess, they will let you know when they're done," I instructed, granting Jay the perfect moment to guide us all through his portal and into the Infernal Palace.
I thought I was over my aversion to demon food, but watching Fang and Tzu eat made my stomach turn. At least Tzu had the decency to have his food killed before he started biting pieces out of it, Fang ran his skamps down and ruined the rug as he tore them apart a little at a time.
Jay just let all of this happen while he politely cut his steak and ate it with the provided silverware.
"You never told me how the naval war is going," I prompted.
"First battle was last night, we captured eleven frigates and a galleon. Had to sink three of them before they surrendered. I've added them to my navy and put Fisto in charge as an admiral, he's pretty pissed about the promotion. I'll be heading back to oversee them once we're done here," Jay reported.
"Excellent, fifteen less ships we'll have to deal with. Tzu, what's that as a percentage?" I asked.
"Not a lot, about a percent. Less now that they're building more ships. Most are converted merchant ships, like ours, so that's why it's so high to begin with," Tzu responded, sounding more sad than anything else I could identify.
"What about the preparations?" Jay wondered, seeming intent on changing the subject before I could ask Tzu what was upsetting him.
"Ahead of schedule," I stated happily, "We've elected to construct defenses by priority rather than all at once, so at least some will be ready when the attack comes. Manehattan now has a respectable wall and coastal barriers, Fillydelphia is nearly done and the final shipment of materials has arrived in Baltimare."
"And the troops?" Jay pressed.
"They average at about five percent better than projected, according to Tzu," I replied.
"None are below our expectations," Tzu sighed.
"Well, our expectations were set pretty low," Jay offered, instantly crushing the pride I'd had in our work.
"That stung," I complained.
"Your basic biology and bone structure makes you dogshit at fighting, it's not personal," Jay retorted, "Being easy to feed is about all that ponies have going for them."
"We have magic," I protested.
"A third have magic, and most of those aren't powerful enough to fight," Jay argued. I didn't have a counter to that, he was right. I didn't have to like it though.
"Tia's super soldier project then," I attempted.
"Who told you about that?" Jay asked, his voice dropping to a low growl as his entire demeanor turned into something far more dangerous. I was keenly aware that I had blundered onto treacherous ground.
"Captain Armor found most of the project notes in the archives, I've forbidden any trials because we didn't have everything," I replied, my mouth dry.
"Fang, go kill Shining and everyone he's been working with. Burn those archives," Jay ordered, but Fang only looked at him for a moment before turning further to seek my approval.
"Did it work?" I asked.
"Those monsters she created, and you know I don't use that word lightly, were uncontrollable. I had to sabotage the serum so they'd die out after a couple weeks, the damage they were doing to the people in their path was just too much to bear," Jay explained.
"How so?" I prompted.
"They could charge right through walls and throw trees around, near enough to my level of strength. Add in the single mindedness and you have an apocalyptic stampede through any poor towns between them and whatever you have them destroy," Jay continued.
"Except that these were Tia's zealots hunting you. They were single minded from the start. A trained soldier may not suffer the same detriments," I postulated, "Fang, do not kill Captain Armor or his associates or burn the archives."
"Ok," Fang replied as he returned to playing with his food.
"Don't do this, the world doesn't need this kind of weapon," Jay demanded.
"I'm going to do a small trial with the unaltered serum, just one volunteer from the army that can pass some mental screenings. If he or she goes insane, I'll just teleport the subject into space," I insisted.
"It'll reach our enemies," Jay countered.
"Then you and Abby and Fang will kill them or your spies will sabotage their efforts just like you did to the original batch," I retorted, growing more confident.
"This is a mistake," Jay declared, but he couldn't win this fight.
"It's my gamble to make, you have my word that I'll personally destroy everything related to this project if it goes as you say," I stated, unmoved.
"I'm serious this time, Luna, do not push this further. Don't make me say anything more," Jay warned.
For the first time in a very long time, a cold line of primal fear crept up my spine.
"Moon and stars, alright Jay, you don't have to kill me to make your point," I relented, causing him to look down at his plate and avoid my gaze. It wasn't until then that either of us noticed that his fork had broken in his grip.
After ten minutes of both of us uncomfortably poking at our unappealing meals, I broke the silence.
"So what really scares you about that serum?" I asked, getting one of Jay's withering glares for bringing the exact same subject back up. He only held it for a second before looking down again.
"I'm not going to drive you away from this with threats," he decided, seeming to talk more to himself, "Fine, you can have my full dossier on that project. Fuck it, have them all. Tzu, you caught that?"
"Yes sir," Tzu replied.
"Fucking fantastic. I need to get this out of my head, I'm going back to sea," Jay declared as he got up and almost jogged out of the room.
"I'm not hungry either. Are you two about done?" I asked.
"I can be," Tzu allowed, "I assume you'll want those reports as soon as we return home?"
"Just the superpony serum one for now, I'll seek out the rest later," I corrected.
Fang was extra twitchy on our walk back to Abby and the solitude of my office there. Indeed, all of the enforcers were less jovial as if they had felt my argument with Jay.
Tzu maintained his professionalism, but he was halfway to being hostile in his movements.
"What's going on with everyone?" Abby asked once Tzu and Fang had left my office.
"I got into an argument with Jay over this superpony serum business, hopefully there's something in this file to explain why it puts them all on edge like this," I replied.
"Oh, that's easy, it worked too well. Lots of enforcers died," Abby responded.
"I thought the spiders were their first battle," I noted.
"It was, the Solare hunted them until Lord Jekyll managed to kill it. He almost died in the process too," Abaddon explained.
I immediately opened the folder and started reading.
One Hundred and Seventy-Five Years Ago
Perspective: Jekyll
About Ninety Miles North of Minos
I was having a good day. I'd secured a nice little hamlet that could be trusted to let me hide in it if things got worse for me and boosted my reputation among the minotaurs in general. Wasn't even hard, just had to save some of their miners after a small collapse.
Job done, deals made, and I was resting in an outdoor bar regaling a small band of locals with some stories of my adventures while sipping some local ale.
Well, I was until a damn building exploded down the street.
I was on my feet in an instant and putting myself between this new threat and the fleeing locals.
What emerged from the ruins of the house was a monster. Twice as wide as a pony should be and three times as tall, what stood out first were how its eyes were too bulged out of their sockets to blink.
My gaze slid down the creature as I took in each detail. The mandible hadn't grown with the maxilla, leaving it with an almost comedic underbite. The neck was so musclebound that it extended past the bones of the shoulders. Each leg was as thick as my torso and ended with a hunk of granite shackled to the beast's ankles.
"What did she do?" I asked, horrified.
"Jekyll! You die!" It bellowed, its voice distorted and sounding as though it were deaf.
I caught the creature's charge and pushed it back before bringing my claws in to end its suffering. Dread entered my mind when I struck bone and couldn't go any further, something I had only ever encountered with Belial before.
"Shit," I swore before I was punted through that nice tavern I'd just been drinking in front of. Based on the blood around me, my uncontrolled flight had launched me into a civilian, "Damn you! Look out for the locals!"
"You die!" It repeated, deliberately kicking down a building to bait me in for another attack.
I took the bait, throwing myself back in and swinging furiously in an effort to hook and sever some joints.
It took much too long and only ended after I'd ridden on the beast's back through several buildings and people while I sawed through the cartilage disks of its spine enough to disable the monster.
There were few buildings left when I finally tore the head free of the body, but it was far too late for those buried in the rubble.
Of the minotaurs I'd just been telling stories to, none remained alive.
"I will stop this from ever happening again. In all my years, I've never seen anything like this. It's too powerful and sadistic to be allowed to exist," I vowed, but my words rang hollow to the survivors. My offers of help rebuilding were scorned, as was my coin and company.
I was an ill omen to them. I couldn't recover from this, I just had to leave.
Upon my return to the Everfree, I had my Canterlot Indias find the project and tamper with the recipe. Nothing too major, as to not expose the discrepancy. Just a single additional thaum added to one of the spells and another ten grams of trihadrosulphate.
The results were perfect, only one out of ten even survived the mutation process and only lasted a week or so. Chelly would call the first one a fluke and bury the project if I didn't meddle further.
I allowed myself to relax at last, getting three days of peace before Dopple came running up to me during one of my hunts to tell me that a Romeo was found dead.
Beaten to death, to be specific.
I'd never felt pain from a blunt strike, which made this all the more concerning.
I made for the body immediately, finding that it had actually burned. It had been punched and kicked, but the blows had struck hard enough to cook my enforcer.
I was hunting a new target now.
Enforcers kept dying, but only individuals. This enemy struck those caught alone, so I made them move in pairs at a minimum.
This worked to at least delay the beast until I could arrive to put it down.
I was dismayed to discover that it was another of the creatures I'd fought outside Minos, but this one had gotten some real equipment.
Iron boots now covered the monster's hooves, which matched the armor covering the rest of it in material if not thickness.
I went directly for its neck, intending to repeat the killing move I'd used on the last one. Instead I was caught and driven into the ground.
I caught two kicks with my ribs and felt myself burning, but managed to get Cataclysm in the way before the third hammered down.
Cataclysm wasn't the sharpest sword ever made, but it was unbreakable. I managed to wedge the blade to prevent my body from taking any more damage, then abandoned it to slip out and deliver a full strength punch to the mutant's stomach.
This got it off of me and made it retch, buying time for me to recover my sword and dive in once more.
My fist striking the metal of its helmet sounded like thunder, but stunned it further and opened its neck to repeated swings of my sword.
I got four in and managed to get the neck armor off before it regained its wits and bucked me away. Considering my speed, it only needed a half second to rally.
I got my feet under me and managed to halt it as it tried to run me down once more, but another hoof caught my gut and tore me from the ground to be beaten back into the dirt.
Cataclysm was torn from me when I tried to repeat the trick from last time, but I took the fucker's throat in return. Typical pony biology working against them, making them expose their necks to grab at things.
It did not care and just kept hammering down with those armored hooves, but it was raining more blood than hits. Barely.
It weakened, barely failing to outlast me. My flesh cracked and bled as I climbed out of the small hole it had dug with my face, decidedly medium well. The beast just glared its hate as I shook off the dead meat and closed in to finish it off.
It didn't die until I decapitated it, but kept its glare even in death.
"Okay, listen up kids. I need three beers, a dozen manticores, and a fuckin nap. Be good sports now," I ordered before toppling over and passing out, landing face down in the weeds and the blood and the twisted iron scraps.
Present Day
Perspective: Luna
Luna's Office, Abaddon
"He's afraid of this?" I asked, bewildered. Could that really be all it was, just fear?
"I mean, they don't scare me. I can just step on them," Abby agreed.
"I want to do a single test, figure out if these things are as wild as Jay believes. I still think Tia gave it to her Wardens," I decided before adding, "And I want Jay there with his hammer to kill it if he's right."
"He might kill you instead," Abby warned, "Last chance to back out before I dispatch a Mike."
"I don't think he will," I lied. I knew he would, the gambit was that I could talk my way out of it before he did.
I didn't have to wait long, but I was inside so many spherical shields that I could barely see out when he came to collect.
At which point I was violently reminded of the unique qualities of his hammer, particularly the magic nullification.
Thankfully, he wasn't in the process of swinging it at my head. His eyes were full of fury, but he wasn't tearing my legs off yet.
"If I have to kill it, I'm going to beat it to death with your bloody carcass instead of this hammer," Jay threatened.
"I understand," I agreed.
"Don't get me wrong, I'll put you back together afterwards. I don't want you dead, even if you're seriously digging under my skin," Jay allowed.
"I'm your wife, I'm supposed to give you headaches," I teased. Thankfully, I'd calculated my play correctly and Jay laughed at the joke.
"You owe me a sandwich after this," he declared, still laughing.
"Yeah, sure, I'll buy you a sandwich," I chuckled, though Jay stopped laughing.
"One, that was a really old and lame joke from my world. Two, do you know how to cook?" Jay asked.
I suddenly felt extremely self conscious, "Well, I've always been royalty. We've had chefs my whole life."
"I'll teach you when we have a slow day, it's a good skill to have," Jay offered, "Let me know when your insane and stupid test is ready, I'll be on the ocean keeping our demon navy from being too stupid."
Perspective Change: Jekyll
That was a little harsh, the demons mostly ran themselves under Fisto's leadership. I just gave him directions and he made things happen.
"Can I ask where you went earlier today?" Notepad asked.
"Luna got into trouble, went back and pulled her out of it," I summarized, intentionally leaving out the second part of that entire mess.
"Princess Luna? What happened?" He asked worriedly.
"Nothing that relates to your reporting," I snapped, though he didn't even flinch.
"I can't very well add to your fictitious tale of fighting in two places at once if I don't know half of the opponents," Note challenged, making me laugh.
"We're in calm seas," I pointed out.
"We won't be," he retorted.
"It was in Canterlot, make something up," I allowed.
"A host of Changeling assassins, got it," Note decided. How I wished it had just been Changelings.
"You seem more chipper about this," I mused.
"Eh, I've decided that I'm just writing fiction and using you for inspiration. Makes it easier," Note confessed.
"That's exactly what you're doing," I agreed.
Some hours passed before anything interesting happened, but even then it was minor enough.
The sea distorted before something like a squid emerged from below the waves.
"Ah, Notepad, this is one of my leviathans. Kraken one dash one, or Kraken Actual, this is my propagandist," I greeted.
"Father, we have detected a large fleet due south of this position and moving towards the Badlands," Kraken one-one reported.
"You heard the sea monster, south by southwest. Let's go people!" I ordered, "Care to join us?"
"No, I have other sectors that need me," the Kraken replied before sinking back under the surface.
"How many of those things do you have?" Notepad asked.
"Of the Krakens? Twelve and counting. Leviathans? Sixteen and counting," I answered.
"There are four that aren't sea monsters?" Note confirmed.
"I very publicly live in one of them," I pointed out, "The other three protect a few key locations."
"How many can you make?" He continued.
"That's a difficult question. Each leviathan requires a massive amount of food to sustain. The area denial leviathans mostly manage themselves, farming worms and using plants to get their energy. The Krakens live off of fish and other marine life. Abaddon needs an entire crew of dedicated hunters to bring him food on a near constant basis," I explained, "Really, I'm limited by the ecosystem at large and by how much I spread them out."
"That isn't a trial and error process, is it?" Notepad asked in concern.
"It's math," I replied, "I like math."
Perspective Change: Chrysalis
Super Secret Changeling Hidden Lair
"Excellent work, using their own mistrust against them will be too easy," I praised, though my eyes were glued to the sketch in front of me rather than the drone that had provided it.
The ponies and their detestable allies were experimenting with exactly the kind of weapon I needed, I just needed to get the formula and some samples. That the foolish ponies were refusing to let any of His monsters inside the laboratory only made it easier.
I graced the drone with a glance before smiling at it, "You've done very well indeed to bring this to me, you must be rewarded."
The drone stood a bit taller, showing his pride.
"You will be the first of my brood to be granted the power of this weapon you've found, once we take it for ourselves," I decreed.
The drone bowed to show his gratitude before backing away and vanishing into the mass of his fellows.
I looked back to the sketch, still grinning.
"Maripony. I don't recall any changeling ever bothering to go way out there, just means they won't know to look out for us," I chuckled darkly, not even getting looks for talking to myself. My drones knew better.
I finally tore my gaze away from the drawing and considered the size of my hive, finding it serviceable for our current state but not for what was to come.
I grinned once more and stood from the carved stone acting as my desk, then turned away from it and laughed at my good fortune as I walked down a passageway towards my spawning chamber.
I first tested the floor to ensure that the excreted padding hadn't calcified; my eggs would need a nice warm and soft bed to gestate on. Once satisfied, I looked to the room's three other occupants.
All three were ponies. All three had been quietly abducted and replaced with a drone.
My obvious choice was the center one, as it was his replacement that had brought me my prize today.
He was too weak to do anything other than groan as my fangs pierced his neck and my venom killed him just a little more.
"Poor, weak, little pony, this brood might be your last," I mocked.
Author's Note
Not sure if I'm totally back or not. I've been writing more than I have in a long time, faster than my editors can keep up. Expect Chapters 40-44 to come in the next few days as we get them cleaned up and ready to go.
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