Divine Nature

by Doood

Rating: mature
Tags: Other, Adventure, Equestria Girls, Human, Main 6, Mystery, Comedy
Length: 5126

You know when things get real if something flashes before your eyes. For me, it was her, and for her, it was something else entirely.

So things have been weird lately, the clouds, weather, even my next door neighbor's dog, All out of wack.

Nobody can explain it, because there is no proof, nor solid evidence towards what is causing such phenomenons... That is, until an answer shows up in my shed.

So here, we have adventure, with a twist. Oh, ponies are evident. But without fur to keep them warm? Let's just say things get a bit heated as life wraps the characters up

Published 2016-09-24 03:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-09-24 03:40:01 UTC

Chapter 1

Chapter 1
Beep, beep, beep

Alarm clock… Nuuuu… Just five mere minutes…

Opening one eye, I blurghed and rolled around, trying my hardest, and failing, to block out that dreadful beeping noise. Sounded like a mixture of a broken clarinet, and a wailing sheepdog. Sadly, When it was for sure to continue, I took my mighty hand, becrested by the best of Daps, and slammed it atop that insatiable machine.

Oh thank… It stopped…

I inhale the morning air and begin my morning routine. Got up, put on my doctorial outfit, went to go piss, brushed my teeth while pissing. From there, I took my moments to comb and style my hair (because I wanted it to be perfect, jog on). Wait, did I wash my hands?

When I was good to go, I smiled and snapped my thumbs towards my reflection, the doppelganger mocking me exactly.

It was a waste of time about halfway through snapping my fingers, so I shrugged and dismissed my stupidity.

Just as I left the restroom, my phone rang, the caller ID popping up with an image of my best friend, Luke McCarthy.

Luke has been there from the start of Middle School. He was a transfer student from apparently, Cork, Ireland. Was a nice little place, but when you gotta go, you gotta go. So Mum and pa wanted to see another state, and well, they did. Probably regret doing so as of now…

Anyway, Luke was a smidge smaller than me, his height capping to about… Eh… 5”9. I was around 6”0. Luke and I matched with similar hair and eye colors though, that being brown and green.

And ever since Middle School, he and I have sorta looked out for each other, living through high School, and getting lucky enough to be Roommates in College. Luke went on to be a mechanic, but ended up working at some insurance company.

I ended up working at a Dentist's, even becoming one myself. And it… Fucking sucks. If you like teeth, good for you. I don't.

I pick up my phone, clearing my throat, “Luke?” His answer made me chuckle, “Yeah, it's me. Ready to go?”

Always found his accent weird, “More or less. Where you at right now?” My answer was replied with three knocks on my door,

“I'm in front of your house dude, stop making me waitin’.”

Right, nodding into the microphone, I bolted from my bedroom and clambered quickly down the stairs. At the bottom, I could see through the door, Luke, bore an unamused expression and wore his State Farm commercial uniform.

Instead of heading out immediately, I grabbed coat and keys, both being within the same area. Then charged out my door with unprofessional courtesy.

Luke looked at me cross, “You alright then?” Seemed like he wanted to laugh, but there was something off in his smile.

“Pretty sure. Let's book it.”

I took a step forward and was met with Luke's hand, “Slow your speed, got a long day ahead of ye, and you're already forgetting somethin’.” He lost his charade when I looked to where he gestured.

“Ah, shoes. Right.” I chuckled, “Be right back.”

So I grabbed my shoes, taking to the streets with Luke. It was a nice day out, sun was shining and there were few clouds floating around lazily. Was kind of crazy for such a day to be Monday, and it would most likely get crazier when I got to work.

“So ‘ave ya heard the news then?” Luke asked once we buckled in. My response was a short shrug, followed by a pat on my knees, “Nah, cable was shut off a few days ago. Why? What's going on?”

Luke started his truck, a green ford, and waggled his brows, “According to the telly, there's been freak storms coming and going around a few areas.”

“Should I be concerned?” I said with a frown.

“I know I am, because fer some reason, I wake up to get you the oter’ day, and there by Frank's place, a fucking storm cloud speeds to the Walmart, and jus’ disappears.”

I said unamused, “You're serious?” From his expression, I merely agreed with a raised lip, “Yeah you're serious. Must've been cool.”

Luke took it in stride, “It was. For t’ most part, I was confused. But past that, I just offed it as another weird thing we live with.”

“Regardless, it sounds like I need to get out more. Been holed up in my house for to long.” I said with a grunt.

“All ya need to do is holler. I'll come running.”

After that, Luke turned on the radio, pulling fast to the brakes as we stopped at a red light, “So in lighter news, Heard ye might be getting promoted? What's that about?”

Ah, yes, my features grew stern as I recalled last months rumors, “Well I could be. But I'm also positive that it isn't a promotion, it's a layoff of sorts. Not your typical one either.”

Luke turned a corner, taking a moment to look over at me, “Care t’ explain?”

“Boss is picking who's out of the job. All of us are good workers, “ I said with raised hands, “But he only needs the capable ones.”

I swear, Luke remained me of my dad, the way he scrunched his face and sniffed, “That's a bit unfair.”

I pointed out, “Hey, I'm good at my job. But there's people at work who're taking more and more time off.” After a moment of mulling the thought over, I turned with a confused gait, “And unfair? Says the guy who ripped someone off.”

“Oh y-, That was a one time thing! Guy couldn't even fucking understand me on t’ phone!”

I rolled my eyes, “Probably because you sound like a Scottish pirate.”

“Irish, Pirate.” Luke said with a grin, “Besides, you seem to forget that one time you ripped a guy's tooth out.”

I protested as we sped along a small road, “Dude, Grace scared the living shit out of me! What was I supposed to do?”

Luke pursed his lips, “How about not ripping some poor guy's tooth out. Tha’ might've worked better in t’ long run.”

Shuffling uncomfortably in the, ‘I’m wrong and he's right’ seat, I muttered loud enough so he could hear, “Fine. Smug bastard…” He seemed to grin even more at that.

We pulled into the workspot a mere few minutes after our little prod, me being the one to unbuckle after Luke set the car into park,

“So, today I'm getting off work early. Gotta go home and check out a few things.”

Luke nodded, taking a moment to pull out his phone to set the alarm no doubt, “Cool, what time?”

I stopped mid turn to grab my stuff, “Uh… I think its around 5?”

“Make sure, then check back with me.” My friend responded with a shrug.

“Alrighty.” I hopped out and shut his door, immediately following; his ford puttering away like a motorboat on water.

With nothing else to do, I pocketed my keys and wallet, stepping inside my workplace,Flosspaste-

Look, I didn't make up the name, the catchphrase was worse. But we lived up to Dental standards.

… For the most part. Recently, because of Grace, I did pull somebody's tooth out. And the end justified the means with the reputation declining a smidge.

But anyways, the first person I greeted, coming inside was the receptionist. I always fucking forgot her name for some reason. It was like, her name was a bane of my existence,

“Haley!” I said cheerfully. The woman looked up from her, ‘paperwork’ and said monotonically,

“Hannah.”

I corrected myself with a smile, “Hannah! How's it going?” No answer, “Alright then, good morning to you too. Say, where's Grace today?”

Hannah clicks her pen and points it somewhere off to the side, for the lack of verbal response, I made up for with a slap on the desk,

“Awesome. See you later!”

When I had gotten far enough away, I dropped the smile and murmured, “Ass.”

Flosspaste was small for a Dentist office, the reason based on the factor for, “Loss of Money”. A few years back, we lost out on a chance to make the place bigger, because we got robbed somehow. Don't ask, I don't know how.

So the lobby was no bigger than a highschool bathroom. From there, a hallway was open to the different rooms that patients were supposed to go in. Basically, after a small lobby, you have your ordinary teeth cleaner place.

My office was in the back, along with the others. It was just a lounge pretty much, offering a soda machine and a few awesome seats. Besides that, anytime a patient comes strolling in, Grace, our clerk alerts us to that.

“Vine! Hey!~” I jumped as she who had been named stepped out,

“Jee-zus!… Grace… My god, hi.” I clutched my heart, “Please warn me where you are next time.”

Grace acted like she had done it all along, “But I called your name like… Fifty times.” I hadn't listened to her statement, and was rather musing to myself aloud,

“Maybe we could buy you a bell.”

“Vine. No.”

I sighed as I came back to the present, “Damn.”

Grace snickered, shaking her blonde hair to and fro. See, this woman had a knack for being a sneaky little person. That is why I… Tore a guy's tooth out. And am scared shitless of her 24/7.

I'm seriously concerned that she might follow me home! And I wouldn't even know about it!!

“Hey Vine, when ya got a minute, you got someone waiting for you in room 10.”

For me? Wow. I’m Mr popular toda- Oh wait...I sucked in through my teeth, “Ah crap… Is it that Peterson guy?”

Grace shuffled her glasses up, holding the clipboard she had in her arms so I could see, “No, its some other guy named Harris, Loran Harris.”

Oh yes, Mr. Harris. A regular customer, and my personal favorite bottom feeder. Guy never flossed, never brushed his teeth, and always complained about how his mouth hurt. It was embarrassing…

I suck in a small breath, putting on a stoic gaze,

“Woman, hold this for me,” I say, holding out Grace my coat, “I must go. Loran Harris needs me.”

Grace snorted, her blue eyes rolling a full 360°, “And people say I'm weird.” As I had walked into the room I was needed in, I shot back at her, “Because you are!”

And with that remark, I turned to clasp my hands together, “And how are we today Loran?”

O.o.O.o.O

I sighed as I hung my coat across my shoulder, “Susan, time check my card please.” There was a silence followed by the receptionists’ sigh,

“Hannah.” I'll get her name right sometime.

I step outside with my head swiveling, peripherals sighting that green truck within seconds. As I walked, I chanced a look upwards, spotting a few overhanging clouds, which, oddly enough, lie still.

With an amused snort, I circled to the passenger side of Luke's truck, “Wassup.”

As I slammed the door shut, the oblivious sleeper snorgled, (yes that's a word) himself awake, “Wha? Oh… Shit.. What time is i-” Not a second too soon, his phone goes off, “-... Okay, fair ‘nuff.”

Luke clears his nose and starts the engine, “So, how was work.”

“An odd question.”

Obviously, the driver was not amused, so I smiled, “Oh it was fun. You should've seen the blackened teeth today man! There was this one guy, Greg? I think his name was?”

I paused for a moment as Luke puttered the truck away, “Anyway, dude's mouth looked like a pack of crayons.”

Luke visibly blanched, “Good Christ tha’s disgutin.”

“Yes, he told me he forgot to floss a few times.” I added with a spaced out stare, “I wanted to call him out on it, but my mind wasn't in that set of time.”

“Reasonable.”

I chuckled to myself and leaned back in my seat, “How was your day?”

Luke snorted, “There were calls and calls of complaints to homes being wrecked, cars being totaled, Oh and a guy died ‘pparently today as well.”

I grimaced, “Jesus.” Luke nodded, “It's quite sad if ye ask me. But nobody does, so…” He turned the car towards the halfway point to home, “And just a word of warnin, we might have a nice little thundershower.”

“I saw the clouds out by work, not saying I didn't know we might.” I said leaning to try and see what was outside. Sure enough, there was a mass of clouds moving towards our spot from the east.

Lately, we’d been getting a mass group of thunderclouds. Weathermen blame it on shifting plates and crap, I just think it's natural because of the lack of rain we had been getting for about a month or so.

Luke shifted his eyes up from the road as a water droplet splattered against his windshield, “Well we are, now.” He suddenly slapped the steering wheel, “Ah fuck. I forget t’ shut my windows… Grab your shit and hold on Vine.”

I frowned deeply and held onto my seat belt for dear life as Luke grasped the need for speed, hitting 50 in six seconds. We raced against the rain, the what used to be, ‘drizzle’, turning into a full on downpour.

“Luke, Luke, LuKE, LUKE, LUKE!!!”

“I see it.”

I yelled against the squeal of tires as the bastard somehow drifted a corner into our neighborhood. It was like seeing a jpg. image, I didn't know what the hell to do. But as Luke scrambled the wheel, he was able to set the vehicle right,

He did a reverse park, slamming on both emergency and regular brake as we skidded to a stop in front of my tan house, “Alright then. Get going, I got stuff to do.” I was pretty sure my knuckles were whiter than my face as I nodded numbly,

“Sure, just uh… Take it easy man.” His response was a shift of gear, and a rev of his ford engine, speeding away when I was clear. As I watched him go, I looked to where the rain was coming from and shivered,

“Hate storms…”

I turn, taking leave to my house. My feet comply to my mind's wishes and lead me inside, my inner recesses reaching out and slamming the door shut. After which, I toss the keys onto the outlaying counter I installed a few weeks ago.

As I shrug off my outfit, I decide to wear my slippers today, a weird thing to do I suppose, but for some reason, I was tired. It was around five o’clock right now, there was still light left in the day, but with the sudden appearance of that storm, it got about ten times darker. So I yawned, just to get that out of the way before heading into my living room.

Maybe a little bit a t.v. would calm me down after recent events. Wonder what I could watch today… there was the news?

“Flash flood warning for the areas of…” Yeah shut up. Ain't nobody got time for that, I know I sure as hell do- OH SCOOBY DOO!

Fuck yes. I shuffle in my seat to get comfy. And pretty soon, after hearing the torrential rain start up, my brain shut down, allowing myself to sleep without a sound.

O.o.O.o.O

But It goes to show, that a storm can hit you pretty hard. Just like the rain, how I woke up, and somehow a shoe pelting me can. I awoke as soon as I heard the thunder resound through my house, my body reacting to it in such a way that I accidentally threw one of my slippers somewhere.

It sounded like someone had just ate floor a second ago. I could sleep through thunder, but something that sounds like that is just ...ungodly.

I rub my face and resort to sighing, sometime in between the hours that I got home and now, did the TV turn static. Good news was I still had power. Which surprised the hell out of me due to the crack the storm took at us earlier.

So I got up, and decided to make me a snack. Along the way, the fearful side in me turns on every light. And by the time I reach the kitchen, my whole house is brighter than the fourth of July.

Guess you would say, I was pretty… “Lit”.

Badumtiss.

I open my fridge and rub my face in choice, trying to figure out just what I should get. There was ham… Eggs, cheese. Could make me a biscuit… but that's to much work…

Fuck it, nutella.

I turned and reach for the cupboard, I normally keep my own little snack stash hidden from hungry eyes. Only Luke and I know where it is because it was the two of us who came up with the idea!

But the wrench was the question that popped up when I found every other snack, except my nutella. The first thought, was, Luke, you fucking ass. You didn't. Oh… You did.

So naturally, I shut the door to my personal stash and sighed loudly. Its at times of my hungorial state, did I feel close to death. FOR I WAS HUNGRY!

WHAM

Uh-oh. I blinked and spun around slowly, seeing as how I just heard something only irrate writers use. Thunder doesn't do that. And for sure, I did not close the refrigerator door.

I opened the closed ice box door, chuckling nervously, as I suddenly felt not so alone, “Uh… Hello?”

As the silence ensued, I made my way around the island in the middle of the kitchen, working towards my phone… Which I had haphazardly thrown with my keys. I awaited a response as I opened the device and readied the speed dial… Just in case.

When nobody said anything, I breathed out and slapped the side of my head, “Crazy... Nobody's stupid enough to break in here… Now that I think about it, I doubt I have anything valuable…”

So I set the phone down and poked the side of my mouth, “At least the thunderstorm is calming down.” I said finally, chancing a look outside.

Well I've been wrong before. And on several occasions, wrong in multiple strings of times. Another crack of thunder resounded, lighting up the whole house, and with its disappearance, it took my electricity with it.

“Shocking,” I said aloud, trying to muse my worries and anxiety with bad jokes. The storm had taken a huge turn and sounded like it was trying to get inside my abode. Never had a storm like this one before.

I reached for the fridge door again, the lights were off, but the case was clearly seen, and decide to grab a drink. After shutting it, I take the cap off and listen to the heavenly fizz of a fresh soda. But before the soda and I pronounced husband and wife, I caught myself staring past the outside screen doors.

Don't think I described this through… See, I have two entrances, one in the front, and then there's one into the back. Technically its an exit, but I always left the screen door unlocked in case I had to climb that red fence in my backyard to get inside. The have been a few rare occasions I have to stealth my house.

The backyard was cluttered with my own personal shed, which inside, was filled to the brim with different little gadgets and gizmos, courtesy of Luke. Now, what had somehow caught my eye through all the rain and thunder plus lightning, was the door to he shed wide fucking open.

I hadn't noticed it at first, because I didn't exactly want to look outside. Grace could've been watching me from the distance and it would've been awkward as hell. And because I didn't notice it until now, I probably didn't see someone inside of it, shuffling around.

The introvert/lonely side of me wants to drink my soda, scratch my ass and then go to sleep, while my adventurous side wants to go and see just who is in my little shed. It was hard enough seeing through the rain and trying to guess what was trickling through my shit, so I weighed my options.

Bitch, or you aren't one… Hm…

As I grabbed my parka, please, try to guess what I am. I unclicked my screen door and held a hand close to my face, trying my best to block out the stinging rain that pelted my exposed skin. It was a good idea to bring the parka, but wearing pajamas was the worst idea I've ever had since that time I got talked into doing the cinnamon challenge.

I had bolted my chairs and table into the concrete when I moved here years ago. So while the living space outside was untouched by the beating winds and stinging rain, the not so bolted stuff looked as if it had been blown back by some unnatural force.

I shivered slightly in the cold rain, moving forward quicker and quicker towards the shed. I did not want to be out here. But curiosity had killed me, and the cat was out of the bag. As I got nearer, whoever had darted inside was shuffling around rather spastically, and when I saw why, I stopped and decided it was probably best to speak instead of surprise.

It was hard, speaking above the rain, but I did it with my awesome self, and tried to coax this person from my architecture,

“Uh… S’cuse me, miss? Its like, 10 at night, there's a freak storm out, and you decided to go freeballing in my shed?” You heard me right. See, amidst the scrambling this woman did trying to get out, she accidentally turned on that little light on the top inside the shed.

It pretty much showed me she was naked as fuck, and had the indecency not to cover herself up. Not that I was complaining.

She didn't answer my question and had seemingly ducked down beneath the window. So I clasped my slowly colder hands together, “Look, I don't bite. Do you got a place to stay?”

Her voice was scratchy and high pitched,(kind of), “Yeah, I do, but it isn't here!”

I snorted, “Well that's obvious. Can you tell me why you don't have any clothes on?”

Her answer made me think about life actually, “What is this, a fashion show?”

“No, but it certainly isn't a strip club.” I answered after getting irritated of listening to the crickets inside my head. When she was to slow to speak, I spoke for her,

“Look, I'm cold, wet, and tired. You can stay in that shed if you like. That's on you. But for the betterment of my mind, and conscious, come with me. I can try and see if I can get you to where you need to go.”

I moved closer to try and hear what she had said after my little statement, something on the verges of like, “I don't know if you can undo what's already done…”

Must've been the wind, “Well put this around you,” I said begrudgingly, throwing my parka into the open doorway, immediately becoming an ice cube, “Don't want you to catch something horrible.” Might be the other way around now, considering I wasn't wearing a fucking shirt at the moment.

But to my plan, she did come from the close- I mean shed, “Thanks.” She said, wiping a wet strand of her hair from her face. Strangely enough, she looked a little unsteady on her feet, so I offered her a hand and commented quickly,

“Let's get you inside, and warmed up. God knows how long you might've been out here.” She snorted in agreement, but held no argument. The one who won that, would be the storm, and boy oh boy did it never stop.

We both entered my conglomerate housing soaked to our bones, both dripping wet. For the first time, and wanting to be a flirtatious asshole, I tried to be smooth, hell maybe even play it cool. It was my house, my rules, and I was gonna try this for once. And since it was the opposite sex, and not fucking Grace, which is weird saying, I pointed upstairs,

“Miss, I got a room upstairs that you can use to wash up and stuff.” Here's where my flirt came in, “But if you want, there's one down here too.” Wait for it… “I'm hopping in one of them myself, and I'd offer you to come with m-”

The girl took off my parka and tossed it over my face, “Nah, I'm good. You said your room? I'll take that.”

I lowered my finger slowly, “Right.”

Mission failed, we'll get ‘em next time.

I took off he parka and shook it a smidge, looking back to see the mysterious girl disappear into the stairway. As I stepped over to ring out the drenched thing, I shook my head and found myself freezing when I noticed a familiar jar roll out.

It was my goddamn nutella.

O.o.O.o.O

So I took the downstairs shower, rinsing myself thoroughly, and thinking through just what I had seen and done. Naked girl, (fist pump), Naked hot girl, (double fist pump), Naked hot girl in my house. Someone throw water over me, cuz I'm on fire! But oh wait, I'm in the shower, so I'm cool as hell.

God I need to get myself realigned…

When I was finished, I stepped from the shower and collected both towel and undergarments. Once down with the set rules and regulations of doing what those two pieces of cloth do best, I stepped out of the bathroom and tried to dry my hair.

It took me a while, though I got it as soon as I walked into the living room . But it seems that girl had the same idea, and walked into the living room as well, drying her… hair off…

I squinted and cocked my head, taking in her features in a better light. Now, take into note, (DID IT ONCE) I looked her over, and she was still stark naked. But the key features she held were muscular. More than average build, serious pecs, was a very curvy, balanced type of gal. Luke would fall for her in an instant.

Seriously, dear lord, it looked like she worked out. A lot.

She had rose colored eyes, a strange mix of red and white I suppose, and then there was her hair. Most people dye their hair green, or maybe even Red and black in support of Markiplier. This girl, dyed her hair in a spectrum of Roy. G. Biv. Colorful in standards, but a weird thing to do at that.

So I was caught staring, and it obviously made her feel albeit uncomfortable, so my eyes wandered to the ground very quickly,

“I uh…” I cleared my throat, “Have some stuff for you to wear miss. Don't need to run around like that.”

“Why?”

I blinked, was this girl daft? I could clearly see her nethers and… You know what, I'm going to be the gentleman here,

“Because I have a strict, clothes on policy.” Thankfully I thought ahead and had left out a sweatshirt and some slacks lying around. So I tossed those to her, “And I would like to talk to you without having to look at the ground.”

The rainbow haired girl mumbled, “Alright, fine, Mr. Bossy.”

I cross my arms and wait for her to finish getting dressed, after which, she looked at me cross while shrugging, “There, I'm dressed. You happy?”

“Not until I know your name.” I say while pointing. Its obvious that from the look on her face, I was beating her. So Ha ha! Score one for me. (Triple fist pump)

But her comeback was interesting, “You first.” She said with her arms crossed, “You said you want to help me, I need to know who you are before I can trust you.”

I sucked in through my teeth, “Should've turned the water heater for my upstairs shower off. You would be showing a lot more respect here then, than now.”

When she raised an unamused brow, I sighed and threw myself on the couch, “Names DeVine Clarke. Most people call me Vine for short because it sounds cooler.”

I looked at her, “Now it's your turn.”

The girl took a seat in one of the chairs, oddly moving her ass so she could sit awkwardly in it, “Rainbow Dash. Most ponies call me Rainbow Dash because it's already cool enough.”

Okay, There were like, three things wrong with that sentence, “Ponies? Rainbow Dash? Wha?”

She shrugged, “I told you my name. So… Yeah.”

I coughed, “I'll call you Dash for right now.”

“Fair enough.”

I smiled halfheartedly and crossed my arms, “So, Dash, would you care to explain why you were in my shed and... eating my nutella?”

Rainbow bit her lip and looked at the ceiling, “Well… First off, I found your food. It was just laying there, and… I was hungry…”

And that is where I draw the line, “There is a thing called lying, Dash, and it is very common to hear with someone who is trying to hide something.”

She looked at me as though I had struck her odd, “But I'm not lying.”

I took it as another red herring, “Says the one with like, twelve packs of muscles.”

Dash giggled, “Oh, well that's from the flying I do.”

Hold it. How can one become so awesomely fit, from flying an airplane? Now that I think about it, some pilots got to pull up from speeds of unknown, and doing that is a feat in itself,

“You're a pilot?”

Dash shook her head and simply ripped off the sweatshirt. My eyes grew wide and my brain sort of clocked out as I saw mounds flash before me,

Oh my god this woman is going to be the anime death of meeeeee~

“Nah, I use these babies.” I was thinking of the image of boobs flying, but when she turned to show me her back, all the comedical shit I just threw out, dropped.

Because on her back, were wings. Blue, feathered, wings.

Author's Note

Ssooooo yeah!
Hope you enjoyed,
Beggining was cringey, but hopefully well worth for the end!
Please, leave a thumbs up, and comment! Both help tremendously!
Keep on Derping!