Manehatten Misshap

As soon as the train got to the station, I was off of that train. Derpy was nice and all, but OH MY BUCKING CELESTIA she talked so much! After I bought her, what was it? 20? 30 muffins? I can't remember, it was a lot, she talked and talked and talked. I, trying to be nice, talked back to her... for eighteen hours. We talked about Seaddle, and my life there, and how her vacation was, and how her life in Ponyville was, and what muffins she likes, and this and that. I was just relieved to be off that train.

My first thought after getting off the train.

Food.

my stomach rumbled in agreement. So I started walking. After I got out of the station I saw a sign for a little cake shop. I was pretty into the idea of cake at that point, so I started off in that direction.

Ponyville was a cute little town, I passed the town hall, which Derpy told me an... interesting... story about. I passed Sweet Apple Acres, said to have the best cider around. I like cider. But, unfortunately for me, it always sold out. I passed some fashion boutique, noting it in case I wanted to get Fruitcake something. I walked past a tree, then realized it was a library. Books are cool, I guess, so I went in.

“Hi!” said a purple unicorn as I entered the tree/library.

“Hello.” I say pleasantly.

“Anything I can help you with?” she asks. “I have books on everything! I just loooovvvveee books!”

I think for a minute then ask “Do you have anything on music theory?”

“Hold on a second,” she says cheerily. “I'll B-R-B.”

Then a voice mutters from the second level of the library. “Seriously, Twilight, I told you to keep those shorthands to texting.”

I chuckle a bit to myself. Then I look around at the library. A nice little place it was. Lots and lots of books, with an odd little statue of a zebra in the middle of the room. I'd met a zebra once, when I was young. She was nice and all, but she only talked in rhymes, which is where I draw the lines.

She comes back in from the other room with several books. “Here you are, mister.” then she turns to the voice. “And I don't care what you say, Spike, it's fun.”

I hear the oh so unique sound of a facehoof.

I take a look at all the books, I pick one from the bottom that sparks my interest.

“The Art of Bass” it says.

It looked interesting enough, so I bought it and on the way out.

“See you L-8-R.”

A pause.

“For Celestia's sake, Twilight.”

I chuckle to myself and head off to the cake shop.

When I get there, I walk in and am greeted by a pink earth pony with crazy hair.

“Hiya!” She says. “I'm Pinkie Pie! Well, that's not my real name, but that's what most ponies call me. I like it because it has pie in it, but that’s in my real name too, but my real name is kinda a mouthful-”

Not again...“Hi,” I interrupt. “I'm Duke.”

She looks puzzled. “Why are you thinking in italics?”

“What?” I say, confused. “I don’t understand what you're saying-”

“Don’t be silly, silly!” she says. “Everyone knows you're supposed to think in BOLD, it looks so much cooler.”

“Whaa-?”

“Oh, never mind, silly.” She says. “What can I get you for? Or get for you, I mean, don't you hate it when you mix up words-”

Her tail starts twitching frantically, then she shoves me out of the way as a potted flower lands next to me.

“Um...” What just happened? “A cake, and some lemonade please.”

“Okey dokey lokey.” She turns away and shouts “And can (B)you(B) stop narrating everything I do, its annoying!”

Pinkie, I'm telling a story, can you please not break the fourth wall so much?

“But it's just so annoying!”

C'mon, the readers are expecting a story.

“Oh, HI READERS!”

Please, Pinkie?

“Fine, but only for the readers.”

“Excuse me, but why are you yelling at the wall?” I ask.

“Oh...” She stammers. “No reason... I'll be right back with that cake.”