Equestria Girls: Magic, Forests, and Hellfire

by Head of Common Mockery

One Rider To The Next

Previous Chapter

Author's Note

There's no sex in this chapter, it's only referenced. So keep it in your pants unless you like looking funny.


One Rider To The Next

It's the morning after the Fall Formal, and Francis Wolfgang has been working with his Uncle Gunther on their Hemi G-Body project. They're at Gunther's garage, a very clean and professional looking workshop inside what looks like a falling apart red barn on the outside. It really wasn't anywhere close to death, as the whole structure has the kind of reinforcement that would make it practically nuke proof. The shop looks like the wet dream of every car mechanic in existence. Every single tool that you would ever need and want, everything neatly organized, everything easily assessabled, everything in an easy-to-figure-out place, and not a thing out of place. The shop was also very clean, aside from a few fluid stains on the floor. But they were only stains, the oils and chemicals are always cleaned off completely. Gunther likes himself a clean workshop, especially when he's worked on everything from Shelby Cobras and Ferrari 250 GTOs to Lamborghini Aventadors and Dodge Vipers. If he can't work on it completely on his own, he's got a buddy that can help him. And he always gets the job done right, even if it costs him. But it usually never does.

As for the G-Body truck that they're working on, it looks good enough to show off at an international car show somewhere in Europe. The body is from a 1985 Chevrolet El Camino, and the front end is from a 1982 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme. They threw out the idea of a Grand National front end out of Francis' personal taste. The wheels are chromed five spokes with tires good for dirt roads and asphat. The suspension has been changed to buggy-like suspension, but it's ride hight is still close to the stock hight with only around an inch more of ground clearance in the back. This G-Body was made to handle the plethora of dirt roads that Francis more commonly drives on, as the City of Canterlot is one of the few larger more city-like towns in the county. The rest is farmland, private property, lazily maintained roads, or Everfree National Park.

The engine being installed is a Hemi. But it's not just any Hemi, as it's a performance rebuilt 426 with modifications. the engine makes six hundred horsepower and enough torque to pull down the Berlin Wall.

"Francis, get over here!" Gunther calls out, "I want you to see this!" Francis crawls up next to Gunther to watch the last bolt needed to fully attach the transmission, "Almost... There.... There! It's done!" The two crawl out from underneath the almost finished muscle car, "Now, do that Ghost Rider thing where you make it all pretty and unbreakable."

With that said, Francis gets into the driver's seat, pulls the keys off of a carabiner, and starts the car. The car starts, and has a vicious growl like a pissed off wolf. Gunther opens the door infont of the car, and Francis let's the car's idle speed bring the beast forward. As the G Body moves out a good distance out of the garage, Francis puts the muscular car in park and revs the engine. The car roars with a roar loud enough to put Godzilla's roar to shame. As the car reaches it's loudest, flame engulfs the whole car and blows away to reveal a beautifully done black paint job with chrome that perfectly reflects the world around it. The monster now looks good enough to show off at an international car show somewhere in Europe.

"Lookin' good, my main man!" Gunther cheers, "That right there's a real beauty!"

"WHAT!?" Francis tries to ask over the beautiful sound of the Hemi, a sound that not even noise canceling headphones can cut out. Gunther gestures at Francis to turn off the engine, and Francis does so. "What?"

"I said lookin' good, my main man! That right there's a real beauty! Maybe that deal wasn't a bad idea after all."

"I told you, I'm not evil! Besides, I only look scary to scare the piss out of scary things."

"Yeah, I believe you. But let's not worry about that, you said you had somewhere to be when this got finished?"

"Yeah, do you remember that woman who asked for us to make a replica of Mad Max's V8 Interceptor?"

"Yeah, I do. Her name was Twilight Velvet, has a son and daughter that go to Crystal Prep. I forgot their names, but you can find them in Appaloosa Hights. Twilight said that she would regularly drive that replica, so you should probably find it somewhere in front of her house. Did she do something bad?"

"No, she didn't. I'm just curious about something."

"Is it over somethin' I probably won't understand?"

"Yeah, it's best you stay out of it."

"That much, I do understand. Well, I've got an anonymous customer who's having a Dodge Challenger Hellcat and one hundred ten smacaroons sent over. Told me to make it into beast! He doesn't know what's comin' to him!"

"Sounds awesome! I've gotta get going. I also have to be at the Everfree Swamps by tonight."

"Well, happy hunting!"

Francis starts the El Camino back up, and drives out to the main road. The road near Gunther's property is usually empty, and it looks devoid of any humans. With that, Francis floors it and rips down the road. He rips through the straights and slides through the turns of the lonely road, Canterlot City becoming more visible by the second. Francis slows the car as he blasts past a sign that says "Welcome to The City of Canterlot"....


Francis pulls up to a sidewalk next to the sight of a V8 Interceptor in front of a house. Francis gets out of his car and makes his way to the front door. He knocks on the front door, and a woman with light purple hair with silvery white stripes answers the door.

"Hi, are you Twilight Velvet?" Francis asks.

"Yes." Twilight answers, "And you're that boy who helped with my Ford Falcon?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Oh! This is unexpected, but how can I help? By the way, good idea with the suggestion to giving my car stiffer suspension! It corners at high speeds like a champ!"

"Good to hear! I'd just like to know the names of your kids."

"Alright, can I know why?"

"Well, there was an exchange student at Canterlot High who I think shares one of your kid's names. I just wanted to confirm it."

"Oh! Well in that case, there's my son Shining Armor and my daughter Twilight Sparkle." The name Twilight Sparkle hits Francis like his head like it had a stomach that just got punched, and he grabs his head like he has a headache, "Are you okay?"

"Mmmm... Huh? Oh! No, I'm fine."

"Here, c'mon in." Twilight Velvet feels Francis' forehead, "Good lord, you're burning up! I'll give you a glass of tea and some Advil for your fever."

"I'm fine, I'm just a real hothead. Believe me."

"Well at least have a seat. Have a glass of iced tea and humor me."

"... Alright."

Francis walks in and takes a look at what Twilight Velvet's wearing. She's most definitely an older woman, but one who's looks seem to have aged like wine. She's wearing red jeans and a grey t-shirt under a red leather jacket. She seems to have an aura of happiness around her that spreads into the room around her. And the room filled with some fancy looking tech. Francis takes a seat on an Italian leather sofa as Twilight Velvet enters her kitchen.

"So, which of my kids shares a name?" Twilight asks as she pours Francis and herself glasses of tea.

"Your daughter..." Francis grips his head again. He's not feeling pain, but the instincts given to him from his Vengeful Spirit are going off like an alarm. So, it's not pain, but it might as well be pain. "You know what? I think I'll take up that offer about the Advil." Twilight reaches into a cabinet and takes a bottle out. She walks over to Francis and hands him a glass of tea and the bottle of Advil, "Thanks."

"Oh, it's no problem. My husbands on a business trip and I could use the company." Twilight says as she takes a seat and gets comfortable, "It's also rather boring with my son falling in love with Crystal Prep's dean, Mi Amore Cadenza."

"Not to be rude, but I don't pay much attention to my school's rival. I'm more into fast and fancy cars, mainly because of my uncle."

"Well, you should look into the local racing circuit! I took my Mad Max replica there to the heavily modified rally race just last weekend, and I actually think I might take it back to Gunther's. Maybe ask if he can't fix or replace a few things, 'cause I think that weekend killed the suspension."

"Oh, actually Gunther has been having the idea of giving a friend a kind of after-race pit service. You'd have to pay for replacement parts, but ten percent of the cost of work hours in simple realigning and readjusting."

"I think I'll ask him about it then! But seriously, I saw that black beauty that you came in. What's it powered by?"

"A modified 426 Hemi."

"The thing hates gas, doesn't it?"

"I wouldn't know. It was literally just finished this morning." And I only worry about gas during the day. It doesn't matter at night. "Well, it was nice talking with you, but I really got to get going. I'm headed for the swamps, and I have to be there by tonight." Francis finishes off his tea, and heads for the front door, "I don't mean to be rude, but I have someone that I'm meeting there."

"Well, have a nice trip!" Twilight says cheerfully, "Don't hurt yourself on the way!"

Francis walks back to his G-Body, and drives away.


Twilight Sparkle... If she's a princess in another world, then what does that make her here? Francis thinks to himself, At least I know that she goes to Crystal Prep, so I'm going to have to find a way to not look suspicious. Probably can't use this new beast. What's more suspicious than a gloss black muscle car with two ends off different cars?

As Francis thinks, he gets a call from Rainbow Dash. He answers the call, and tosses the phone onto the passenger side with the phone set to speaker.

"Hey Francis!" Dash excitedly exclaimed.

"Hey Dash, what's goin' on?" Francis asks.

"Remember when that angel guy told you to head to the swamps?" Rainbow Dash asks, with slight excitement in her voice.

"I'm becoming skeptical of what you're going to ask, but yes?"

"Could I come with?"

"You know i'm not going to the national swap, right?"

"Yeah, you're going to the place that's riddled with rednecks!"

"Dash, Someone shoots me and the holes gone by nightfall. Someone shoots you, and you'll probably bleed a lot and end up in the hospital by nightfall."

"Oh, c'mon! I know that you won't let that happen! If you let me come with, I will stay where ever you say that it's safe. Cross my heart hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!"

"... Oi. Alright, you can come. But if you get hurt, don't say I didn't warn you. And know that I don't agree with putting you in danger."

"SWEET!! See You Soon!"

With that, Rainbow Dash hangs up and Francis heads for Rainbow Dash's place. The notion of this doesn't please Francis, as he had Rainbow Dash's dad don't exactly see eye to eye. This is because Bow Hothamd things that Francis is the rebel type; and that he's in love with his daughter. He's right with Francis being love with his daughter, but is incorrect in assuming that he's a rebel. He doesn't know the rebel types occasionally make Francis gag on the spot.

Francis is a smart kid. He just seems like the rebel type because he's willing to step in where others aren't, and how we ended up beating up president Sombra's kid in middle school. In fact, he got in a lot of trouble as a kid for starting fights with school bullies. This was because Francis loved standing up for that which can't stand up for itself, even if he knew he would lose. And it was that quality that the devil saw in Francis which made him choose Francis become a new Spirit of Vengeance. Even though Francis gotten a lot of trouble as a kid, his mother knew why. She thought it was Francis taking after his father. Now, as far as friends go, Francis has none. But this was mostly because when he wasn't at school, he was with either his Uncle Gunther or his mother... But still, Francis has to once again meet face to face with Dash's father.


Francis is walking up to the Dash household, and feels nervous. And he feels nervous for all the right reasons. This is because Bow Hothand, also known as Rainbow Blaze, is a retired United States Marine Corps Scout Sniper who's really shiny. For all Francis knows, Bow knows that he can turn into a flaming skeleton in dark enough places. And Bow could probably kick his ass, Spirits of Vengeance don't get fancy fighting moves. They get supernatural strength, but it means nothing if they don't know how to throw a good punch.

Francis knocks on there door of the Rainbow household, and its quickly answered by Windy Whistles.

"Christ, Francis!" Windy says, looking at a Francis who's shaking in his Converse, "Why are you always so nervous around here?"

"Your husband, the war hero." Francis responds.

"Well, he's not here." Windy says, giving relief to Francis, "Rainbow Dash is in her room. And I know who she's been waiting for."

"Thanks, Mrs. Whistles." Francis says as he walks into the house. He makes his way to Rainbow's door, and before he can knock-

"I know you're there." Rainbow says in a rather seductive tone, "I have a surprise in here waiting for you."

This is gonna get fascinating real quick. Francis thinks to himself while opening Dash's door. As he opens it, he spots Rainbow Dash in rainbow elbow gloves, rainbow toe socks, rainbow panties, and a blue t-shirt thats one size too small on purpose. With the addition of Dash's muscles showing through everything, Francis is having a hard time taking in the image before him.

"What do you think?" Rainbow Dash asks, her half lidded eyes looking into the eyes of a Francis Wolfgang who's wiping his sweating forehead with a handkerchief.

This woman's going to kill me with her looks one day. Francis thinks while he shuts the door behind him....



A 1990 GMC Jimmy and a 1975 Ford Bronco are ripped through the muddy roads of the Everfree Swamps in the light of the day's setting sun. Both have a man in the back with assault rifles, and they're both looking for something. The men are all arguing in what would sound like gibberish, but one thing is for certain... They're running from something that's not too far behind them. The road splits, and the Bronco takes the path that strays from the main dirt road. That separate path leads down a very dark road.

"Look At 'Em Callisters Cower," One of the men states as he sees the Bronco disappear into the darkness, "They're Hiddin' From-" a fiery explosion is spotted, and a chunk of the Bronco's grill hits on of the men, "-a... Fight?"

"You kidding'?" The driver of the Jimmy says, "That thang don't fight. It kill."

The sun sets, and the remaining light is blocked by the mass of trees on each side of the road. a few minutes pass, and the Jimmy stalls out.

"Damn! Outta Guzzoline!" The driver yells.

"What're We Gonna Do, Cuz!?" a midget sitting ion the passenger seat asks, shaking in fear.

"Sam, We'll make-" the man standing in the back is cut off by the aggressive roar of a high powered V8, "Fuck That, We're Dea-" The man in the back is cut off by his own astonishment as a gloss black 1967 Pontiac GTO slowly comes into view, "... That's a beautiful beast... It's like Belle and Beast, y'know from that Disney film, it's like they fucked when Beast was still ugly and this was their child."

"Amen." The driver says in agreement.

The GTO begins to rev it's engine loudly as it can go, and flames begin top shoot from the hood scoop. It charges at the Jimmy with it's rear wheels spinning and catching fire, the from tires following suit. The men in the Jimmy all hop out and head for a bush down the road as the GTO rams the Jimmy, the truck exploding upon contact. A flaming skeleton on the inside draws a flaming sawed off shotgun, points it out the passenger side window, and blasts the bush with a fiery slug that burns away the ex-driver and the man that was standing in the back... Leaving only the midget. The GTO keeps going, but the midget notices the fact that the flaming skeleton is gone. The midget draws a .44 Magnum long barrel, and springs to the dirt road.

"Come Out Of Hidin', Y'Little Bitch!!" the midget yells out.

"Ain't that the pot calling the kettle black, Hokey Puck." a demented voice says that seems to echo through the forest. the midget turns around to see a flaming skeleton in black boots, blue jeans, a faux leather jacket, and faux leather gloves. The midget empties his revolver into the skeleton, but every bullet melts on contact, "Will 'Hockey Puck' O'Nelson, one of the three feuding families of the Everfree Swamps. You've been known to sneak into the houses of the other families and fuck their children. Of course, they're too busy fucking each other to notice anyway. And the families have had moles that sneak into the other's household and fuck whatever it can find for years. Lotta fuckery, if I do say so myself. But then again, I'm Californian. We have really shitty public schools. What do I know?"

"You sure do talk a lot, feller." the midget points out.

"Yeah, I do talk a lot." The skeleton says as it points the shotgun from earlier at the midget, "I'll cut this down for ya."

The skeleton fires the second barrel of the shotgun from earlier and blasts the midget to a pile of ash. It then looks over to the road and sees that it's GTO is returning. The muscle car stops, the skeleton gets in, and it drives down the road that the trucks were going down.

"Fuckin' rednecks." the skeleton says to itself, "They're just as weird as those stick wolves that've been tromping through here. those things ain't holy, but they ain't unholy neither. But, that's why I'm here. And that teenager who's supposed to help me is late... Ah, he might have a girlfriend... I miss my wife... And I talk to myself too much... Ah, who cares. No one's listening." The skeleton comes upon a house with armed men and women in front of it, Well, time to kill some rednecks..."