Riddle School

by starry star

Rating: everyone
Tags: Pinkie Pie, Crossover, Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Adventure
Length: 1616

Dash escapes from school

Dash hates school. The teachers are crazy, the interiors are dull and dirty and the janitor refuses to clean it. Dash decides she is done with school and decides to leave it. Unfortunatley, the key to the school door is in the principal's office and outside it is a big fat hungry cookie monster pony. Will she be able to bust out of school?

(A pony parody of Jonchrome's Riddle School)

Published 2016-10-09 05:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-10-10 12:08:21 UTC

Escaping Riddle Elementary School

Author's Note

Dash is in elementry school so that means she is a filly.

Escaping Riddle Elementary School

Dash Egghead (yes, that's her name) was in Mr. Phenie's class (A.K.A the class for the insane) and listening to his maths lecture. She was the only student in the class and didn't have her best friend to talk too.

"Whats 2+2 again? I forget." said the teacher.

"It's 4, right?" asked Dash.

"Wrong, its 3."

"No, its 4"

"Shut up egghead, its 3."

"*sigh*"

The teacher was constantly feeding that foul with the wrong information. The teacher was as insane as the name of the class he was teaching.

In boredom, Dash slammed her face on the desk. That's it, she is done with school. Dash decides to escape school.

But first, Dash has to escape from Mr. Phenie's class. She looks at the window,the electrical plug, the board and then to the pencil sharping machine. Suddenly, she got an idea. She took a big dirty wad of gum under her desk and her pencil which she don't write notes with.

"Hey teacher!" said Dash.

"What? Can't you see I am desperately trying to divide 15678908 with 0?" said the teacher.

"Um...no, can I sharpen my pencil?"

"Yes, but only one at a time."

Dash rolled her eyes at her dumb teacher as there was only 1 student in the class. Dash put gum in the pencil slot and on that ahe put her pencil. The machine broke and Mr. Phenie went into panic.

"OMIGOSH!!! THE SHARPENING MACHINE BROKE!!! The world will end, ponies shall perish and....die..."said the teacher as he fainted.

Dash was not suprised how he overreacted, he does that all the time.

The first thing Dash said after she got out was, "Well, that was sharp..(I can't believe I said that)."

East to dash was the school's entrance door, also known as the door to freedom. Unfortunatley, it was locked. To add up her troubles, she didn't have a hall pass, she could be in detention and that is worse that being in Mr . Phenie's class.

Thank goodness Derpy, the hall monitor was'nt around or else she would be done for. Just then, she saw something in open locker, it was a hall pass. Dash was free she walked towards her old classroom and Derpy stopped her.

"Hey Dash!" said Derpy.

"What?" asked Dash.

"Show me your hall pass or else......I will.....I don't know....do you have a pass or not?"

"Yes I do, now get out of my way loser."

Derpy got out of her way and went towards her old class which had her old teacher, Mrs.Coffee Beans. She was expelled from that class because she teased somepony.

Dash went inside and nopony noticed her as as the student's desk were taller than she was and the teacher was busy teaching.

Ms. Coffee Beans, is a tall mare who finishes lesses early in a hard to understand voice and drinks so much coffee , she won the record of drinking coffee, she won the record of drinking coffee. How much coffee she drank? 453. Ms. Coffee thinks that one day someone will break her record but it turns out no one will.

In front row of the tiny classroom was the foul she teased, Pinkie. She is known for her smile and she is the only student in the school who actually likes learning. Pinkie is also very sensitive and that's why she got teased so easily.

Behind her Twi, the filly who has no problem in freezing the water fountain in 10 seconds flat. This is so because Twi has a very strange infection that she can't get used to since birth.

Next to Twi was AJ, Dash's best friend. She is always bored in class and never pay attention to any atention to any of her lessons. This is probably because AJ is very lazy.

Like I said before, no one saw Dash and she tried to find something which would help her escape.The only thing she found was the Janitor's precious feather duster in the trash can. She decided to return it, not because it was 'the right thing to do'. But she would also like to see the janitor do his snoopy happy dance.

She went to the janitor's closet and the janitor hollered -

"What are you doing here?!"

"Um.....I was just-" said Dash.

"GET OUT FROM HERE!"

"Actually, I wanted to give you back your feather duster."

"OMG! Thank you!"

The janitor started doing doing his snoopy happy dance. Man, how dash wished she had a camera to record this moment.

"Um......" said Janitor. "Why are you still here?"

"To get my reward."

"What reward?"

"For finding your feather duster."

"Well.....Fine! Here is a dollar....don't spend it on the canteen food.....you understand pal?"

"err.......yes."

"Now get out of here!"

Dash hates the janitor and his attiude. She would be the happiest pony in this world if she would just out of this jail, also known as school.

She went to wands the principal's office but it was the blocked by a huge cookie ~~monster~~ pony, also known as cookie swirl.

"Coooookies" said Cookie Swirl.

"Then you will let go inside the office?" asked Dash.

"Gimmme coooookie...."

"I will take that as a yes."

Dash went towards to the cafeteria before she went in she saw the school's exit door. Dash never checked the door was open or locked because she thought it looked creepy. It was sealed by nailed wood which had a lot of scratches on it.

Dash ignored it and went in the cafeteria which had a cookie vending machine. The cafeteria was empty, perfect she could get a cookie for cookie swirl and then, freedom!

Unfortunatley, the vending machine was broken. Even if it did work, there was no cookies inside the cookie vending machine.

Now what in the world is Dash supposed to do? She thought and thought and thought and thought but didn't have a clue and suddenly she had an idea. She could give the dollar she had to cookie swirl thinking that she could use it to buy a cookie for herself.

She went to principal's office with cookie swirl sitting on its door.

"Where is meeee cooookie?" asked cookie swirl.

"Sorry, I don't have any cookies, but I found a dollar. You want it?" said Dash.

"Cookie swirl don't need money. She wants coooookies."

"Okay fine, I was just gonna give you this dollar so you can a cookie from that vending machine. oh well..."

When Dash said Cookie, Cookie Wirl's eyes widened.

"Oooo....Dollar will gimme cooookie. gimme dolllar." said Cookie Swirl.

Dash threw the dollar away from the principal's door. Cookie Swirl caught it and marched towards the cafeteria.

Dash went in the office and saw the vice principal typing something on the keyboard.

"What do ya want?" said the vice principal.

"I need to see the principal." said Dash.

"Why?"

"It's an emergency."

"Why?"

"It's an emergency."

"THEN GO TO THE BATHROOM!!!!"

Dash needed a much, much, much better way to get in the principal's office. Suddenly, Dash got an idea she hopes it work. She went inside the office again.

"What do ya want now?" asked the principal.

"I need to see the principal." said Dash.

"I need to tell him a joke."

"Oh go ahead, jokes are always fun."

Dash opened the door and went into stealth mode.

The principal was huge, he was even larger than cookie swirl. The principal was sleeping on his desk. Dash quickly grabbed the key.

The principal suddenly got up from his nap and noticed Dash taking the key, he then slammed his desk on Dash, but luckily Dash escaped.

Dash ran to the door of freedom before the principal could raise the alarm. She put the key in the key slot and turned it. It made a 'click' sound.

When she opened the door, smelled the sweet smell of freedom ~~which will not last forever~~.

While Dash was running down the steps of the school, she didn't notice she stepped on some metal box.....signal....thing.

Surely, That box don't serve any purpose right?

'Escaping' Riddle University

Past went middle school, past went high school. Dash escaped both of them.

However, Despite Dash's absence the teacher put A's on all her subjects and now Dash finds herself in college.

She could'nt believe how dumb the teachers were. She had no choice but to attend the university. Dash decided to escape that too, but it was going to be a lot more harder.

And it was.

She was attended the first class of the day - Mr. Swirl's Biology class.

Mr. Swirl gave the students some practice worksheets. Pinkie started doing them right away while the others didn't.

Twi didn't do it cause she was too busy shivering, AJ didn't do it because she didn't know how the answers to anything and Dash did'nt do it because she simply didn't want to do it at all.

Dash decided this was her chance to do something to escape. Unfortunatley, Mr. Swirl caught her eye.

He pulled out a button he likes to call the dictator's switch and pressed it.

A hole appeared below Dash and she fell in it. She tried to fly out of the hole but she was not able to move and it looks like there was no way out.

Dash went deeper and deeper in the hole. As she was falling she started to feel hot, then she saw why she was feeling that way. She saw..........lava.

Dash screamed, but she couldn't do anything.

She fell in the lava........and died.

TO BE CONTINUED......