Sunset Shimmer is Perfect
Sunset Shimmer is Perfect
“Thanks for agreeing to let me join you for the day, Sunset.” Twilight smiled at her friend as they walked down the halls of Canterlot High.
Sunset smiled back. “No problem, Twilight. You never really got the high school experience the first time you were here.”
“Mhm. I’m all ready to take notes on how my experience differs from Equestrian schools!” Twilight held up a notepad and pen and grinned. Sunset just rolled her eyes as they reached her locker.
“The one you should really thank is Principal Celestia for authorizing this,” Sunset said. “You may actually want to consider paying attention to the classes, too. Could learn about this world.” Sunset spun the dial on her lock as she spoke.
“We have libraries for that,” Twilight said with stars in her eyes.
Sunset pulled her locker door open and a small pile of envelopes and folded papers fell to her feet. She looked down and frowned. “Hm, small haul today.”
“Sunset?” Twilight knelt and looked at the papers. “Is everything okay?”
“It’s nothing.” Sunset began to pick them up. “I usually get at least two dozen of them every morning and as many at the end of the day.”
“What are they?”
Sunset held one envelope out to Twilight. “See for yourself.”
Twilight opened the envelope and pulled out the letter inside. “Sunset Shimmer. Even in my wildest dreams I cannot imagine a woman as beautiful or kind as you. If you were my girlfriend I would shower you with the adoration you deserve.” Twilight blushed furiously. “Sunset, are these all love letters?”
“Some of them.” Sunset shrugged and held out one piece of paper that had been ripped from a notebook. “This one just says ‘meet me in the third-floor janitor’s closet at lunch for the best time of your life’.”
Twilight choked and coughed. “Are they all from the same person?”
Sunset shook her head. “A few of them are from girls.” She held out a folded piece of paper to Twilight.
Twilight cautiously took the paper and unfolded it. “Dear Sunset. I am totally straight. But I would go gay for you in a heartbeat. If you ever come out, please call me. 525…” Twilight blinked. “Wow.”
“Here’s a charmer.” Sunset rolled her eyes and looked at another note. “Dear Sunset. You are the most booty-licious girl in the school. I heard you used to be a horse. That’s cool because I wouldn’t mind saddling up and taking you for—”
“Sunset!” Twilight snatched the note from her hands. “Not in public!”
Sunset shrugged. “Sorry.”
Twilight watched as she gathered the letters into a pile. “You don’t seem bothered by it.”
“I’m used to it. Get these all the time.” Sunset pulled a plastic bag from her locker and began to load the letters into it. “Be my girlfriend, be my lover, be my wife, I want you to have my children, I can’t have children but I’d like to have yours. After a while it kinda loses its impact.”
“I guess…” Twilight frowned. Sunset stood up with the bag of letters under her arm. “What do you do with those?”
“Recycle them. As least it gets reused. We’ll swing by the bins by the newspaper office and then go to class.”
“Now that everyone is seated, we can begin.” Ms. Harshwhinny stood up and walked towards the students. “This midterm is worth twenty percent of your final mark, so doing well on it is your chance to patch up a failing grade. There are fifty multiple choice questions and ten short answer. You have sixty minutes to finish the test. Any questions not answered will be a zero.” She began to walk down the rows, setting the tests face-down in front of the students.
Sitting next to Sunset, Twilight looked over at her. “Are you sure I should be here? I don’t want to distract you while you’re trying to focus on a test.” She gasped. “What if you fail? Because of me?”
Sunset shrugged. “Up to you. I’ll be fine, though.”
Twilight shuffled in her seat but remained. Ms. Harshwhinny continued to pass out tests and put one on Sunset’s desk. When she reached the front of the room she sat down. “Upon completing your test, please place it face-down on your desk and be seat quietly. You may study or use your phones in non-disruptive ways if you wish. I advise double-checking your answers.” She reached to her watch and pressed a button it. “Your sixty minutes have begun.”
The students turned their tests over and began to read the questions. Twilight leaned over in her seat to look at Sunset’s test. Which war, begun in the 1700s, became known as… Twilight stopped as she saw Sunset’s hand move and turned her attention to her friend. Sunset’s, eyes set on the paper, quickly moved her hand down the page, pausing at each question for only a few seconds before circling one of the choices and moving to the next. When she reached the bottom of the page she folded it to the back to go to the next.
Twilight leaned over to whisper. “Sunset, shouldn’t you actually read the questions?”
“I am.” Sunset continued to swiftly mark down her answers and moved to the third page.
“But…” Twilight furrowed her brow. “Are you sure those are the right answers?”
Sunset rolled her eyes. “No, Sparky, I’m checking the wrong ones.” Sunset finished her current page and moved to the next. Twilight didn’t even have time to read the first question before they were all answered and Sunset flipped to the next page, the short answer questions. She barely read them any longer than the multiple choice before she began writing out her answers. Twilight looked up at the clock. Barely five minutes had passed since Sunset flipped over her test.
“There.” Sunset finished her last short answer and set her pencil down. She leaned back in her chair and stretched her arms to the floor.
“Um, Sunset?” Twilight leaned in. “Shouldn’t you double-check your answers?”
“Why? They won’t be any more correct the second time.” Sunset reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone and a pair of earbuds.
“How can you be sure they’re right?”
“Because I know so?” Sunset shrugged and put the earbuds in. Twilight frowned as Sunset put some song on her phone and closed her eyes, bobbing her head to the lyrics. She picked up Sunset’s test and quietly walked to the front of the room.
“Excuse me?” She stood in front of Ms. Harshwhinny’s desk.
“Ah, Ms. Sparkle.” Ms. Harshwhinny sniffed. “Yes?”
“Could you please grade Sunset’s test?”
“Tests will be graded and handed out tomorrow.”
“Please? For me?” Twilight held out the test. “I refuse to accept she finished this early without getting at least a few wrong.”
Ms. Harshwhinny huffed but took the test and flipped through it. “Well, at a glance and without issuing a formal grade, it appears she did indeed get every answer correct, at least as far as multiple choice goes. Though I cannot say I share your surprise.”
“Why, is the test not hard?”
“To the contrary; it’s a midterm, after all. But Sunset has a tendency to speedily complete all exams and tests given to her with perfect scores.” Ms. Harshwhinny frowned. “I can only recall one test in memory where she did not get a perfect score due to a single erroneous answer.”
“Ah-ha!” Twilight smiled in triumph.
“But she then wrote a handwritten essay on lined paper and handed it in with the test, explaining why the answer’s correctness was based on the personal biases of historical figures whose reputations have been called into question by recent discoveries. Taking such things into account she argued it is highly likely that my marking sheet is outdated, and that in the light of this new evidence, it is more probable that her answer is the correct one.” Ms. Harshwhinny tilted her head. “Right or wrong on that point, her arguments showed a strong understanding of the subject matter, so I gave her a bonus mark. She scored a forty-out-of-forty all the same.”
Twilight’s jaw dropped and she slowly turned to stare at Sunset. Sunset caught her gaze and gave her a wink as she listened to her phone.
“I refuse to accept that.” Surrounded by her human friends in the lunchroom, Twilight shook her head. “There is no way Sunset has gotten perfect on every single test she has ever taken.”
“It’s true.” Applejack held up her hands. “We don’t know how she does it. Ah’ve never seen her study much.”
“I just have a knack for learning, I guess.” Sunset shook her head. “It’s not a big deal.”
“It is so a big deal!” Twilight slammed her hands on the table. “Do you know how statistically impossible it is for you to not get a single test question wrong in the three-plus years you’ve been here?”
“The odds are one in five hundred, six thousand and forty-five.” Sunset smiled sheepishly. “I sat down and calculated it when I had fifty-seven minutes left on my math exam last month.”
Twilight grunted angrily.
“It’s something you get used to,” Fluttershy said. “I never really much paid attention when she was mean, but Sunset is sort of… well, perfect.”
Twilight groaned. “Give me a break.”
“It’s true, darling.” Rarity waved a hand in the air. “I’ve gone dress shopping with her. This girl can make any dress work. Anything. I even purposefully picked out the worse dresses in the store—”
“I knew it,” Sunset muttered under her breath.
“—and she still looked gorgeous. I took her to the spa afterwards and they kept thinking she was just leaving.” Rarity sighed and gave Sunset a longing look. “My quietly seething jealousy knows no bounds. I’d kill for hair with that kind of volume.”
“You think you’ve got it bad?” Rainbow Dash scoffed. “She joined the soccer team last month and she’s already our star player!”
Sunset held up a hand. “That’s really an exaggeration, Dash.”
“What about our big win against Manehattan Secondary last week?”
“It wasn’t that big a win.”
“We won fifty-six to one! And I think that one point was a pity penalty from the ref.”
“It was a team effort.”
“The team was all sick. You played alone.”
“They cheered me on and gave me emotional support, it made a big difference.”
Pinkie patted Sunset on the head. “Smart, pretty, athletic, she plays guitar, and she’s humble! Yup, just about perfect!”
“Stop saying that,” Sunset gently brushed her arm away. “I am not perfect.”
“Really?” Rainbow crossed her arms. “Name one flaw you have.”
“Easy! I…” Sunset paused. “I… well, I got over that… I don’t do that anymore… I’ve been told that’s kind of endearing, so no…” She scrunched her face. “Give me a second here.”
Applejack shook her head. “Sunset, we’re trying to give you a compliment.”
“I’ve got it!” Sunset held up a hand and smiled. “I’m stubborn!”
Rainbow snorted. “No you’re not.”
Sunset blinked and lowered her hand. “I’m not?”
“No, because if you were you would have argued that.”
Sunset groaned. “Right…”
Rainbow nodded. “See? You’re kind, you’re reasonable, you’re brave. Everyone loves you.”
“No they don’t.”
“No? Hey, Twi, watch this.” Applejack pulled a pen from her pocket and wrote something down on a napkin. “Sunset, read this out loud for me.” She held it out.
Sunset took the napkin, read it over, and said very stiffly “Oh no, I’m low on lunch money. Can anyone lend me a dollar?”
With a rush of footsteps and the squeak of chairs, suddenly several dozen arms were stretched towards the table, bills of various denominations in their hands. The girls grew quiet as Sunset awkwardly looked around. “Um… nevermind. I’m okay.” Everyone with bills looked crestfallen, turned, and went back to their tables. However, one boy kept his hand held out.
“Please take my money.”
“No thanks, I’m good.”
“Just touch it, then.”
“Ew, no!”
He whimpered and walked away.
“I thought he was gay,” Rainbow mused. Rarity nodded.
“See, Twilight?” Applejack shrugged. “Everyone loves Sunset.”
“And why not?” Pinkie grinned. “She’s everything worth loving!”
“She is not perfect!” Twilight snapped.
“Then you name a character flaw,” Rainbow challenged.
“Um… okay…” Twilight began to think over her interactions with Sunset since her reformation. “She… she can… be… a little…”
“Twilight, please say something,” Sunset pleaded. “I am not liking this any more than you.”
“I’m trying!” Twilight hissed. She looked Sunset over. “You’re very… very… well, a little… sometimes you… are… kinda sarcastic.”
Everyone else at the table save for them laughed. “Yeah, right!” Rainbow snickered. “Sarcasm is just being funny, Twilight. So Sunny’s got a sense of humor.”
“Not only that!” Twilight replied. “She’s also… er…” She grunted and slapped a hand to her face. “You can be a bit… clumsy!”
Sunset raised an eyebrow. “Clumsy? That’s the best you can come up with?”
“I was panicking!”
“She’s not clumsy at all,” Rarity said. “Besides, even if she were, I’ve been told by many that a little bit of clumsiness can be very endearing. It makes one seem vulnerable.”
“Even her flaws are strengths!” Pinkie said brightly.
“Twilight, did some sort of brainwashing Equestrian magical being come through the portal recently?” Sunset asked. Twilight’s eyes widened. She stood up and grabbed Sunset by the arm. “Twilight!”
“Yes, that must be it!” Twilight pulled Sunset through the halls of the school. “There is some sort of magic at work here.”
“So, let’s go back to Equestria safe from it and find out what’s affecting them?” Sunset asked, coming forward to walk with her.
“Not them, you!” Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Something is augmenting your abilities, your appearance. There is no way one single human can be this athletic, intelligent, beautiful, and musically gifted, and they are not using magic to enhance their skills.”
“Okay, maybe that’s a little – wait, what was that third one?”
“Just come with me!”
They reached the entrance to the school and stepped up to the portal. Sunset paused in front of it. “Wait, Twilight…” She bit her lip. “I’m not sure this is a good idea. I haven’t been to Equestria in months. I thought if I ever went back it’d be with an army. Maybe—”
“Yeah, yeah, let’s go Little Miss Perfect.” Sunset cried out as Twilight shoved her through the portal.
Twilight stepped through the portal, the familiar sense of space-time distortion washing over her. When she opened her eyes she was back in her library. “Good, now that I have magic this will be easy to figure out.” She turned back to Sunset.
Sunset groaned and climbed to her hooves, stumbling. “Whoa… not used to having hooves after so long…” She looked up and saw Twilight staring. “Twilight?” Sunset cocked her head. Twilight slowly raised a hoof to point just past Sunset. Sunset turned her head.
“Hey!” A large orange wing poked out of Sunset’s side. She looked to the other side to see its twin and flexed them back and forth. “Um… okay, that’s weird…” She circled around to examine herself. “Maybe I really am under some sort of augmentation spell…”
As she turned away, Twilight felt her eyes wander. Now that she’s a pony again, Sunset is kind of… Twilight glanced down at her best friend’s flank. Not kind of, really… Her eyes widened. Oh, for the love of Celestia!
“You’re right, Twilight. Something is wrong. What sort of spell did you have in mind to examine me?” Sunset looked back and noticed Twilight approaching the door. “Twilight?”
“I’m going to bed!”
“It’s not even one in the afternoon.”
“I know what time it is!”
