Everypony Loves Dash

by SKX

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Romance
Length: 2203

Something's up with everypony in Ponyville, and it's up to Rainbow Dash to get to the bottom of things.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2011-07-10 22:00:32 UTC

Chapter 1

        Rainbow Dash drifted through the sky over Ponyville atop a small, fluffy cloud. She was relaxing after a not-so-hard day of work, just a few clouds to get rid of to let the sun shine down for a beautiful day. Nonetheless, she was taking a nap anyway. Or at least she was trying to, when everypony’s favorite chatterbox called for her.

        “Rainbow Daaaaaaaaaaaaash!” Could be heard by nearly all of Equestria. Rainbow Dash sat up, her eyes open and a frown on her face. She looked over the edge of the cloud to see Pinkie Pie and Apple Jack looking from side to side, probably for her. Dash could see Pinkie opening her mouth again to yell, so she quickly zoomed down to stop her.

“Pinkie!” Dash said quickly, clamping Pinkie’s mouth shut with a hoof. “I’m here, what do you want?” She wasn’t exactly happy to be woken from her after work nap, but she was still happy to see her friends.

         “Oh, hi Dash.” Pinkie said, quickly. “See, me and Apple Jack were just having an argument and wanted you to see who was right.”

        The blue pony looked confused. “You wanted me to settle your argument?” She had never been the one to settle anything before. She wasn’t known for problem solving, unless the problem had to do with flying fast. Or running fast. Or doing anything fast, really. “Shouldn’t you get, I don’t know, Twilight for that?” She said. “Unless your argument is who the fastest pony in all of Ponyville is, then I don’t think I can-” She was cut of as Pinkie began again.

        “No no no no, it’s not that. But I know you can answer it though. You see, me and Apple Jack were just over there, talking about you, and we just need to know which one of us you love.”

        “Oh, well in that case, wait, WHAT?!” Rainbow’s eyes grew wide and her chin nearly hit the ground. She couldn’t have heard that right, even Pinkie wasn’t random enough to ask something like that. And get Apple Jack in on it? Outrageous.

“Yeah, see, I was telling Apple Jack how me and you are totally a thing, how we always hang out, and pull pranks, and have fun and stuff, but then she was going on about how,” Pinkie stopped for a moment to make a silly face and mock Apple Jack’s voice as she said; “I really care about Rainbow Dash and I know she cares about me and blah, blah, blah.”

        “No wait just one apple pickin’ second.” Apple Jack said, sticking her hoof in front of Pinkie’s face. The look on Pinkie’s face turned to one of surprise as Apple Jack started to talk. “Me and Rainbow are way deeper than y’all’s fun and games. Ain’t that right, Dash?”

        Rainbow Dash stood with a look of shock frozen on her face. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Pinkie Pie and Apple Jack… in love with her? That didn’t even make sense. They were all mares for goodness sake!

        “Dash? You feelin’ all right, Sugarcube?” Apple Jack said, coming up closer to Rainbow to check her.

        Rainbow jumped back, a blush covering her face. “Y-yeah, I’m fine but, uh, the clouds are calling!” She said. She didn’t know what was going on, but she couldn’t stay there. “I gotta go!” She quickly tried to fly away, only to realize that Apple Jack had grabbed her tail in her mouth. HOW DOES SHE ALWAYS DO THAT? Rainbow Dash thought to herself.

        “Not until you answer the question!” Apple Jack said, her mouth still full of Rainbow Dash’s tail.

        Rainbow had to think. She didn’t want to pick either pony, and risk hurting the other’s feelings, and risk whatever came after, but she couldn’t just leave. She needed a distraction any sort of distraction, just so she could fly away without Apple Jack’s amazing ability to catch her. There was absolutely nothing around them, and the only thing that would distract these two from her would be… “Look out behind you!” She exclaimed. Well that was dumb, they aren’t going to-

        The other ponies quickly turned back to see what Rainbow Dash had seen. Dash was surprised for a second, but quickly took the opportunity to fly as fast and far away as she could. Apple Jack heard her take off and turned around to see that she was already long gone. “Gosh darn it!” She said, galloping after.

Pinkie was looking around for what Rainbow Dash had seen. “What, what is it?” She looked back to see she was alone. “Dash?”

        Dash looked down for someplace to hide. Someplace Apple Jack and Pinkie wouldn’t look for her. She spotted Flutter Shy’s house below her and quickly dropped down to the door. It wasn’t locked so she quickly opened it and slammed it behind her.

        Flutter Shy, who was sitting with Angel looked up with surprise to see a very relieved looking Rainbow Dash by her door. “Oh, um, hi, Rainbow Dash.” She said quietly.

        “Flutter Shy, am I glad to see you!” Rainbow said, smiling. “I think Apple Jack and Pinkie have gone crazy! Well, Apple Jack’s gone crazy. Pinkie is pretty much the same.”

        “Oh my, that’s horrible!” Flutter Shy says, surprised. Her surprised though, was still just barely above a whisper. “But um, what did they do?”

        “You’re not going to believe this. They said they’re in love… with me!” Rainbow says, shaking her head and chuckling.

        Flutter Shy chuckles a little too, but looks sort of nervous. “Well, um, I suppose, but is it really, that, um crazy to feel that way?”

        Rainbow Dash’s relieved face changes to one of surprise. “Flutter Shy what are you saying.” She said, monotone.

        “I mean, well, you are um, really strong” Angel, who had been sitting just barely awake sat up quickly and tried to get Flutter Shy’s attention. “and brave, a-and cool,” Flutter Shy though, was too busy staring at the ground, her face so red it seemed like someone had painted it. “and I, I love you Dash!” She finishes, looking up to see her door open and Dash gone. Angel facepaw’d. Just then, Apple Jack burst into the room, followed by Pinkie Pie.

        “Have ya seen Rainbow, Flutter Shy?” She asked, looking around the room.

        “Yeah, we can’t find her anywhere!” Pinkie says, looking under a carpet. “Well, not anywhere, we only looked from over there to over here, but we couldn’t find, and Apple Jack saw her fly over this way, and we thought you had probably seen her, so we came over-”

        “Pinkie, I think she gets it.” Apple jack says, cutting her off.

        “Well, um, she was just here, but she left. I could, um, help you look for her if you want.”

        “Thank you kindly, Flutter Shy. We’ll be able to find her better with eyes in the sky.”

        Rainbow had to hide somewhere and collect her thoughts. She needed to go somewhere no one would think to look for her, but where…she scanned all of Ponyville until she spotted Rarity’s house. It was hard not to spot it honestly; it stuck out like a well-dressed thumb. She landed and entered quickly. Not many in Ponyville ever locked their doors. She breathed a sigh of relief before hearing a noise above her. Coming down the stairs was Rarity, dressed in the fanciest dress Rainbow Dash had ever seen.

        “Oh, Dash, just the pony I was looking for.” Rarity says, coming down the stairs as if she was modeling. “What do you think of my dress?”

        “It’s, uh, it’s great, Rarity.” Rainbow said. She didn’t really care for Rarity’s dress, but Rarity liked them, and she wasn’t going to hurt her friend’s feelings.

        “That’s good, I wanted to show it off to you. I really care about you and your opinions, Dash.”

        “I- Rarity not you too.” Dash says, backing towards the door again.

        “Oh Rainbow Dash, what do you mean? I simply wanted to show you some of my wonderful outfits, and see what-” She looked back over her dress as she sad this, and looked back just to see that Rainbow Dash was gone. “Now where did she run off too? I had so many outfits for us to try on.”

        Moments later, the other three ponies looking for Rainbow Dash were at Rarity’s door, asking if she’d seen Dash.

        “I have, she was just here. She flew out just a few minutes before you got here.”

        Apple Jack looked up to the sky. It was true, there was a fading Rainbow that Rainbow Dash had left. “Alright gals, we’ve almost got her!” She said, galloping to where the Rainbow ended. Pinkie and Flutter Shy followed after, and after removing her dress, Rarity followed.

        Rainbow Dash flew through the air in a panic. This couldn’t be happening, she had to be dreaming. She didn’t know what to do. She couldn’t pick one, she didn’t know if she even felt that way about her friends. Sure, she had a lot of fun with Pinkie Pie, and Apple Jack obviously cared for her. Flutter Shy was as cute as they come, and Rarity had a certain charm about her, but love? She just didn’t know. She needed somepony who could solve problems, and Twilight Sparkle was just that pony.

        Twilight had a balcony, so it was easier to fly right in. ‘Twilight, I need your help!” She said, landing inside. Twilight was flipping through a book and Spike was putting books away when Rainbow interrupted.

        “Oh, h-hi, Rainbow Dash!” Twilight said, putting her book down quickly. “What’s up?”

        “You aren’t going to believe…” Rainbow Dash was about to tell her about the other ponies, but she wanted to make sure she didn’t want this to be a repeat of every other pony so far. “Twilight are you in love with me?” She said quickly.

        Twilight blushed and stepped back at her friend’s question. “W-well, I don’t know, I mean, I’ve never felt this way before…” She said, looking down at the ground. “I don’t know what it is about you Rainbow Dash, but I-” She looked up and Rainbow Dash was gone.  A knock on the door and Rainbow dash went down to see the other four ponies, who recruited Twilight for their search.

        Rainbow sighed, looking over the city. This was officially insane. Was every pony in Ponyville like this? She hovered in the air for a while, thinking of what to do next. Her train of thought was cut short by the all to familiar voice of Pinkie.

        “Rainbow Dash, there you are!” She called. Rainbow looked down to see all five of her best friends standing on the ground below.

        “Oh horse feathers!” Rainbow said, getting ready to dash off.

        “Wait just a sec, Dash!” Apple Jack called up. “All you gotta do is say that you love me, and this whole chase can be over!”

        “And even if you fly away, we’ll just follow your rainbow’s again!” Pinkie said, smiling.

        “Waaaiit, loves you?” was said by Rarity, Twilight, Pinkie, and Flutter Shy, almost in unison.

        “She loves me way more!” Exclaimed Pinkie.

        “Why would she love you when she has me, as beautiful as I am?” Said Rarity. The five ponies got into a large quarrel, each saying how Rainbow Dash loved each of them and how bad everypony else was. This commotion caused ponies all around to come out of their houses.

        “What’s all the noise about?”

        “Yeah, I was just- Rainbow Dash!”  With that, everypony except the five fighting looked up to see Rainbow Dash.

        “Dash!”

        “Rainbow!”

        “I love you, Rainbow Dash!”

        “No, I love Rainbow Dash!”

        Before she knew it, everypony in Ponyville was outside, calling out their love for Dash. Like with her friends, everypony started arguing to see who loved Dash more. Dash flew away as fast as she could. As soon as she was getting out of the city, she got onto the ground. She remembered what Pinkie had said, that she could be followed by her rainbow trail. She walked on the path, looking back to see if she had been followed. Not looking where she was going, she bumped right into someone who was heading into town.

        “Oh, sorry!” Rainbow said, recoiling and looking up to see Big Macintosh, who was pulling an apple cart into town. “Oh, hey Big Macintosh.” She said, letting out a sigh of relief. She was worried it might have been Apple Jack, or one of those other love crazed Lunatics from town.

        “Howdy, Rainbow Dash.” Big Macintosh said, slowly.

        Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Man, you wouldn’t believe what your sister is doing back in town.” She was about to tell Big Mac all about what had happened with everyone in Ponyville, when Apple Jack interrupted her.

        “Ya sure are lookin’ pretty, today.” It had taken him a while to build up the courage to say that.

        Rainbow Dash looked at Big Mac with a look of fear. “Not you too.”

        “Eeeyup.”

        “WHAT IS WRONG WITH EVERYPONY?!” Rainbow said, taking off in a sprint away from Ponyville.