Starlight Glimmer is the Best at Friends

by Syeekoh

Rating: everyone
Tags: Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Starlight Glimmer
Length: 1377

Starlight Glimmer makes a new friend using the smooth, buttery flavor of avocado.

Starlight Glimmer is hanging out in the kitchen when an otherwordly entity pops in.

Naturally, she decides to befriend it.

With an avocado.

Preread by Rainedash and Mr101!

Published 2016-10-13 22:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-10-13 22:10:01 UTC

Like No One Ever Was

Starlight Glimmer was feeling pretty good about herself. She had just eaten an avocado, which are just the best. They’re super buttery and they melt in your mouth like a sunrise overlooking a snowfall. They’re literally that good.

Starlight leaned back on the chair in the kitchen of Twilight’s castle—well, one of them. She had like, ten, and no idea what to do with them. Most likely probably maybe use them for storage when she built up too much stuff. Or maybe seal them, fill them with water, and turn them into wave pools. That’s always an actionable plan. At least it is when Starlight’s around.

Speaking of plans, Starlight had no idea what to do for the rest of the day. She used to until she sampled that sumptuous avocado, which was simply delectable by the way, and her mind went blank from the glorious flavor. But yeah, she needed something to do. So she racked her brain for activities to do today.

Activities, activities, activities, Starlight mused. What activities do I want to do today? She yawned.

“Perhaps I can be of assistance,” a gravelly voice said behind her.

Starlight rubbed her eyes and turned around, which threw the entire chair off-balance and she almost cracked her head open, were it not for her reflexive magic creating a super-soft pillow. The chair was done for, though, it breaking under the weight of falling a small distance. They just don’t make chairs like they used to. I could buy new chairs, Starlight thought as she righted herself to face her new visitor who offered her some help on what to do today. Before buying new chairs, of course.

Her new visitor was a sight to behold. He, judging by the square muzzle shape, was equine in form, with what appeared to be spindly bat wings extending from his back, a mane and tail composed of pure smoke, and skin that was most reminiscent of molten lava. Yet something caused Starlight Glimmer to raise an eyebrow at this new equine creature that had indirectly broken the chair she had previously been sitting in.

“Why isn’t the floor melting under you?” Starlight asked.

The creature slowly blinked, opened his mouth, then delicately closed it. “What?”

Starlight walked over to him and gave his skin a light poke. He was warm to the touch. “You appear to be made of molten lava, yet the floor isn’t melting under you.”

“Look,” he said with a blush, “it’s just a glamour. You know, an illusion meant to strike fear into the hearts of those I—hey!” He jerked his wing back as Starlight grasped it in her magic. “I just got those manicured! Magic off!”

Starlight grunted as she sat on the floor. “Fine. No need to get so touchy.” She examined him up and down. “What manner of creature are you, by the way?”

He sighed as a plume of viscous smoke emanated from his mouth. “Well, since the shock and awe doesn’t appear to be working, I suppose I could just tell you.” His eyes transformed into pools of pure blackness. No so much black as the absence of light itself. “I am Iztx, a demon come to alleviate your boredom.”

Starlight peered quizzically until the hamster in her head started running again, at which point her eyes lit up. “Oh, so you’re like a buddy!”

Iztx nodded. “Indeed,” he said as a smile wrapped itself around his muzzle, “and your wish is my command.”

Starlight beamed. “So that means…”

“Yes, Starlight,” he intoned as he stretched his wings to their full span, “let your imagination run wild with possibility!”

“… That I can ask you to try an avocado!” Starlight finished as she stood and made her way to the refrigerator, opening the door on the way there.

Iztx retracted his wings and pursed his lips as he glared over at Starlight, who was currently rummaging through the fridge for another avocado. “Seriously?” he asked, the timbre of his voice resembling a frustrated puppy more than Tartarus-spawn, “I said anything you desire.”

“Yeah, yeah, I heard you the first time. Ah, here it is,” Starlight said as she fished out the avocado and offered it to Iztx. “Here, it’s delicious! Just make sure you peel off the skin first,” Starlight said with a giggle, “I made that mistake and boy howdy does it not taste good!”

Iztx glared at Starlight, who wore a grin like it was her first Hearth’s Warming Eve for the fifth time. “You’re an idiot, aren’t you?”

Starlight moved over to the table and expertly spooled the skin off of the avocado in a perfect spiral. “Actually, there’s also this—” Starlight sliced the avocado in half ”—this huge seed you have to watch out for,” she said as she plucked the golf-ball-sized seed out of the avocado and tossed it into the trash. “Did you know that avocados used to be called alligator pears back in the day?”

Iztx hummed. “I wasn’t aware of that, actually. That’s rather interesting.” He walked over to the table and picked up the skin. “I’d assume it’s due to the bumpy texture of the covering.”

“Yep.” Starlight turned to Iztx and offered him the two avocado halves. “So you gonna try it or what?”

Iztx peered at one of the halves, examining it this way and that like a toymaker examining his work, then plucked it from Starlight’s magic. He gave it a few more glances, then bit into it. His mouth remained motionless for a moment, then gave another chew.

Starlight smiled again. “Pretty good, isn’t it?”

Iztx nodded. “This… this is amazing!” he said as he gave the piece of avocado in his mouth another chew, “what have I been eating all of my life? Well, actually, I can answer that, it’s been—” he gave the avocado another chew “—a steady diet of doomed souls and broken wishes, but I might have to consider adding these to my meal plan.”

“I know, they’re just the best!” Starlight said, the smile now threatening to consume her entire face.

Just then a shriek that could shatter bone filled the air.

“Starlight Glimmer! Why is there a demon in the kitchen!?”

Starlight and Iztx turned their heads and saw Twilight Sparkle, eyes as wide as the Ghastly Gorge and shivering like—well, like she had just seen a demon in her kitchen. One of her many kitchens.

Starlight grinned and motioned towards Iztx. “Oh, hi, Twilight, this is Iggzcks—”

“Iztx—”

“Yeah, whatever,” Starlight interrupted. “Anyway, this is Iztx. He came because I was bored and said he’d do anything I wanted him to, so I shared an avocado with him!”

Iztx faced Twilight and bowed, chewing a few more times before swallowing and taking another bite. “It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Princess of Friendship.”

Starlight looked at Iztx. “You know who she is?”

“Of course,” Iztx said as he chewed slowly, savoring each release of flavor his teeth allowed, “it’s part of demon code to be able to address royalty upon sight.”

“Y-y-y-you have a code?” Twilight asked, her teeth shaking like maracas.

“Oh yes, we’re—oh sweet Tartarus this avocado is amazing…” Iztx mumbled before continuing, “we’re very organized.”

Starlight’s face twinkled. “Look, you two already have something in common! Isn’t this great?”

Twilight glanced at the demon, who was in avocado ecstasy, then at Starlight, who looked like she had just discovered the magic of a down pillow for the first time.

“We’re going chair shopping later!” Starlight added.

“T-that’s n-n-nice,” Twilight said, her voice box quavering like it had just been dunked in a bucket of ice.

Iztx finished off his avocado half. “As long as we get more avocados, that’s fine with me.”

Starlight turned to Iztx. “Actually, you wanna go chair shopping now?”

Iztx shrugged as he grabbed the second avocado half in one of his wings. “Sure.”

Starlight and Iztx walked out of the kitchen. The sound of a body hitting the floor thrummed through the air soon after.

Starlight smiled. She had just received confirmation that she was the best at making friends, judging by the fact that her prowess knocked Twilight right off of her hooves.