Spike's Imaginary(?) Friend

> "Nothing is true, everything is permitted."~Ezio

Everything is white except for the horizon, but there is something darkening it. Monsters...made of kneading. Large chain teeth. They are getting closer. before they reach me I wake up.

"What's with the weird dreams? Anyway, I have to see if the spell has done it's magic." I search around the room for a mirror aaaaaand "I can see me!" I extend my hand to touch the mirror. I can feel it! I'm finally real! "Maybe now Celestia can return me home."

I knock at the door of the study that took me time searching for.

"Come in." She didn't even ask 'Who's there?'. Oh well, there goes my knock knock joke. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah. So what did you want me here for?"

"Nothing too big, we just need to make things right."

"And does it require evacuating the castle to do that?"

"Oh yes, you don't want ponies running around screaming wolf." for some reason, I didn't feel that that was entirely true, though it made perfect sense.

"Okay, well, can you like, zap me back? I hope that's what you meant by 'making right'."

"Of course." Her eyes glow white and zap!

"WHAT THE HELL!!" It went completely limb. Paralyzed. Useless. "MY ARM! I CAN'T FEEL MY ARM!" She glows again. "Better hit the road or I'm toast."

(LISTEN TO THIS.)

"STOP AT ONCE!" Whoa, royal voice is even more frightening with Celestia.

"WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS?!" I shout as I run through the castle maze. I see a door in the distance. "Please lead me out, please, please, please. DAMMIT!" A ray of light passes near me, I look back and I find the alabaster alicorn on full pursuit mode. I run through countless doors until...

"Daylight, I hate you." No time to criticize, run! unfortunately, I had to run on rooftops, since the door opened to a balcony.

"GUARDS! SEIZE HIM!" Okay, this isn't too hard, step, step, step, jump, grab,climb and run. I continue to repeat the motion surprised that I didn't run out of air. How did I get this stamina? Anyway it's working for me.

"YOU'LL NEVER ESCAPE THE ROYAL GUARD!" A guard shouts while catching up to me. He has wings! He's cheating!

"What's that creature?!" A pedestrian pony from below asks.

"Oh my, the Royal Guard is chasing him."

"Oh, it's so ugly!"

For the love of...give me a break.

I suddenly feel very drained. The song in my head is my only fuel now.

"DON'T LET HIM IT GET AWAY!" Faster, faster dammit! I trip and luckily fall on a haystack. They continue running and I sneak in the opposite direction.

"How do you wish to be scourged?" A fimiliar voice from behind asks.

"That depends on what scourge means." her eyes glow again, luckily she misses. Must find escape! The next thing I know I was running on Canterlot rooftops again. The exhaustion is unbearable, my vision is blurring. I'm assuming that Celestia is right behind me. I stop at the edge of a building due to low energy and look at my limb arm. Blood... I fall from the edge. Where did these black feathers come from?

(STOP THE MUSIC.)

Endless roads are all I see. I try walking on one and the fraction is over the top, almost ripping my shoes. Where will it lead me? There is nothing to be seen. no sun, no moon, no stars. Nothing, just the road.....I groan as I wake up.

"Awww, what happened?"

"You almost bled out." Someone from the shadows said.

"And I assume you 'saved' me? Who are you?" The pony in question steps out. "Well, that explains the black feathers. How have you been Luna?"

"Good for the most part."

"Hey, since you're close to 'The Kind Ruler Of Equestria' I think you know why in the world did she just try to fry me."

"That is classified information."

"I thought you were on my side. Speaking of which, why did you help me?"

"That is classified too."

"Really? Your personal reasons are classified as national secrets."

"Well, no."

"Then what? I need to know the reasons so we can solve this."

"And you need to trust me, it cannot be solved."

"Then what do I do now?"

"You must escape elsewhere."

"elsewhere where?"

"I do not know."

"So that's it? I'm dead?" No answer. "Does she know about this?"

"About what?"

"You helping me out."

"She will soon."

"One last question, where are we now?"

"The castle's underground."

"WHAT?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME? CELESTIA IS RIGHT UPSTAIRS?!!"

"Shushhhh, it's the last place she'll think of."

"Ooooooooh, smart."

"It was Rust's idea. This way I'll keep a close eye on you without Celestia noticing me missing."

"Whoa, whoawhoawhoa, are you saying I'll stay here for who knows when?"

"Unless we come up with a plan then yes."

"Look, I'm not staying locked here and you can't stop me." I try to get up and accidently  support on my left arm, yes the wounded one. I bite my lip trying not to make a sound. "Ok fine, I'll stay." Those bandages make me look so badass.

"Glad that you changed your mind."

"yeah yeah, but I'm going to need some entertainment."

"What do you do for fun?" She pronounces word 'fun' a little more than excited.

"I don't think video games are available." I try to think of other things I do. Internet, TV, Ipod, school DAMMIT! I have nothing to do. "Uh, I don't do anything." She grimaced.

"You never heard of fun? I used to be like you when-"

"Nononono, I just can't do anything right now and- never mind. Do you happen to have a phonograph?" I can't believe I'm stepping so low.

"Yes, it's in my room."

"And some records of Vinyl Scratch?"

"Guard!" She calls somepony.

"Yes, your highness."

"Find records of Vinyl Scratch."

"Of course."

"Anything else?" I think for a moment and plaster an evil grin.

"Well, in that case, I'll need a large pepperoni pizza with extra mushroom and cheese, pineapple juice, ten cupcakes with with all flavors, two......."