Passage

by Bristewings

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Sad, Trixie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2796

A lighthouse at the end of the world beckons ponies to its heart

I feel empty... Am I alive? Am I dead? Does it matter if I hurt myself, or is all this just a dream?

Published 2012-06-29 04:44:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-06-29 04:44:02 UTC

Chapter 1

Trixie almost jumped out of bed. She huffed and puffed as she sat straight up in bed. Her heart was racing. “Not again,” she said as she laid down on her bed. She looked up at the grey lifeless ceiling above her, and she could hear the wind blowing outside, but it didn't make her any calmer.

She could still feel the wind against her body, and the fear tugging at her heart as she looked into the darkness, but it was merely a dream. Though she had doubted that after the dream kept recurring every night.

Trixie shook her head and tried to forget it as she slowly slid her body out of the bed, but the sheets were soaked with sweat, and clung to her. She managed to use her magic to get them off of herself, but it was hard work. Both her mind and body lacked the calmness she usually had when using magic.

She pushed the wooden door open, and walked out into the concrete hallway. Grey, and lifeless. Her hooves wobbled, so she used one of them and supported herself against the walls. The adrenaline were still racing in her body, and kept her heart rhythm from slowing down.

Trixie stood in the hallway for a few moments and gathered her strength. “This can't continue,” she said as she trudged forward. Trixie's hooves felt heavy as if they were made of concrete themselves.

She urged herself forward into the kitchen, and sat herself down on a hay ball in front of an old and rotten wooden table. She looked out the single window in the room, and looked at the storm outside. It had raged since she had come to the island and the sky didn't even let up to let the sun in, so it deprived her of even that little.

Trixie sighed and levitated a small metal cup down from a shelf in the room, and onto the table. Slowly and methodically she filled it up with water. “Even that is gone,” she said as she peered into the cup. She drank it and swallowed it. She frowned as she felt the tasteless water pass down her throat, and into her stomach.

Her coffee had run out several days ago, and left her only with the water. She started to get sick of it. Trixie looked around the pale and bland room. The only colours present were coming from her coat and her mane, but even they had started to lose their natural glow.

Trixie looked out the window. “I hope there's one today,” she said as she got up from the ball of hay.

She moved down the hallway and moved towards the door at the end. It was wooden as well, and flaked its green paint badly. When Trixie reached the end she levitated a purple, and blue-striped scarf off of a coat-rack. She tied it around her neck, and remembered to secure it tightly before she went outside.

The wind gusted around her and made it hard for her to stand, but Trixie didn't waver. She swallowed, and had to keep her breath due to the fierce strength of the storm. “Decrepit outpost,” she muttered to herself as she descended the concrete steps down a sloped hill to her destination.

It tore across the landscape, and dragged with it much of the grass into the air. Trixie stopped for a moment to catch her breath. “I... I can't do it,” she said to herself as her voice was filled with sadness and she looked back at the lighthouse.

You have to. What if you've gotten one today? Trixie thought to herself, and urged herself on. She took a look around her surroundings, and held her breath as she resumed walking down the concrete steps. The sound of her hooves echoed across the open landscape. It was only her, the grass field, and these steps of stone here.

She kept stopping at regular intervals to catch her breath, but after some effort she made it. Trixie swallowed, closed her eyes, and reached her hoof forwards and opened the metal case. She smiled as she opened her eyes and looked into the metal box, but her face quickly faded. “It's empty....”

Trixie's voice faded as she slumped against the post-box. She just sat and watched the fleeting grass in front of her. She had been on the island for days, and her position there was secured by Celestia herself. “I... Why haven’t I gotten a letter!” she screamed into the open void, but her voice fell for deaf ears.

She hung her head, and slumped together as she pulled her body close to herself. It was partly for warmth, and partly for her to take solace in herself. Tears streamed down her eyes and she whimpered as the wind continued to blow, but it had picked up speed during her descent, and made her mane flutter wildly.

I... I'm so alone... Trixie thought to herself and tried to get up, but her strength wasn't enough as her legs refused to move. The wind dried her cheeks, and made them damp as she turned her eyes skyward. The clouds shrouded the sky in darkness above her and refused to let up.

“Nothing... nothing,” she said.

After what felt like an eternity, Trixie's hooves decided to work and she got up, but had to use one of them to support herself for a moment. “I...” she trailed off and just started the long ascent up the steps. Trixie hung her head as she walked, and kept looking at the grey concrete mixed with the stark green of grass, but it too seemed to fade.

Trixie closed the door, and used her magic to close the metal lock. It clang shut and the sound of it echoed through the hallway in front of her.

She sniffled as she walked through the last door in the room, but that was different. It was made of metal and was dented badly. Trixie used her hooves to open the door, and started up the winding metal staircase. The sound of hooves against metal echoed as she walked upwards. She passed small windows every now and then, and she looked outside every-time, but nothing changed.

Trixie walked out of the stairs into a circular room. She just stood, and watched out the windows, and supported herself against the metal lamp in the room. “At least I have this,” she mumbled to herself.

She gathered her strength and walked around the lamp. Trixie picked up a small wax candle with her hooves, and settled it in the middle as she pulled out what was left of the last one. Her horn flared and she lit the candle, and bathed the small room in golden light.

Trixie pushed the base of the circular lamp, and it began to turn. This was her job. She herself had been appointed to be the new guard of the lighthouse, and she welcomed it at the time.

She slumped against one of the windows and let her body lay limp on the concrete surface. Every few seconds, her shadow would shoot out of the window as the light behind her passed. “I just want to go home!” she screamed in the little room. Her eyes felt damp again as she pushed her hooves close, and wrapped her tail around her body.

***

Trixie had laid in the room for hours on hours. Her cheeks were still wet as she blinked her eyes open, and looked into the darkness outside. Night-time had descended upon the island, but she could still hear the wind outside as it whipped against the structure.

She shivered as she got up, but fell to the floor. Her entire body felt numb and heavy at the same time. Trixie started to talk, but nothing came out. It only withered out into a little squeak as the light passed her.

Trixie got up from the floor as her strength returned to her and she opened the metal door, and stepped outside onto the metal floor. It was perforated, so she could see straight down onto the roof of the house below. The door closed behind her with a dulled-out metal clank.

She supported herself against the metal railing as the wind blew past her. Trixie's cheeks felt wet again, and she put a hoof to her eyes to dry them, but they weren't wet. A single droplet of water landed on her nose, and a few more followed. Soon enough it was raining.

Trixie shook as a noise erupted across the sky and her heart raced again. She stumbled back from the railing, and huddled her body to the window as the light passed. Then, a single white, and blue line of light descended from the sky and hit the horizon. The dreadful noise followed, and made Trixie shake again.

She wanted to step inside again, but her body wouldn't waiver. “Wow...” was all that she managed to say as another light erupted across the sky, and it was followed by that same noise, but it was higher now.

Trixie held out a hoof, and reached over the metal railing. She could feel the water against her hoof and closed her eyes. She kept it there, and kept feeling the water against her hoof. Lightning kept streaking across the sky, but it didn't make her shake any-more.

She opened her eyes when she couldn't hear the sound of thunder any-more, and saw that the rain had stopped, so she took back her hoof. Trixie kept looking out into the darkness and was barely able to discern the horizon. The sky was as bleak as the water.

Tears streamed down her face again, and she stepped away from the railing as it started to moan and creak. Her heart was racing again, and it felt as if it would never stop. Ever since she came to the island she had this sense of urgency in her body.

She wiped her eyes with a hoof, and walked through the metal door.

***

Trixie's eyes shot open as she awakened in her bed. Her pillow was wet and her heart was racing. “Please... make it stop,” she whimpered as she rolled over to her side. The walls of her room were equally bleak, and grey as the rest of the building.

She managed to drag her body out of bed and out to the kitchen. “What?” she said as she looked out the window with a confused look on her face. It was still dark outside, but she felt as if she had slept a day. Had she not?

Trixie shook her head, and levitated her metal cup down from a shelf, and used her magic to open the valve on the metal sink. It fizzled, and groaned with a loud banging noise. Trixie's magic imploded, and the metal cup clanged against the concrete floor.

She turned the valve manually several times, but nothing would come out. “Please!” she kept screaming as she tried opening and closing it several times. It ultimately led to her breaking it off, and throwing it across the room.

What if today's the day? Trixie thought to herself, but she shook her head. She slumped against the floor, but an idea sparked in her head. She scurried from the kitchen, and back into her room. Blue magic surrounded the letter as she levitated it out of the wooden desk next to her bed, and she made sure that it was the one with a royal seal.

“What?” she said both aloud and inside her. Trixie frantically turned the letter upside down, and looked at both sides, but there was no way around it. She even tried looking in the desk, but she had only gotten one letter. The letter fluttered to the ground as she slumped on the bed.

It was blank.

Trixie laid down on the bed, and tucked her hooves in close. She closed her eyes and tried to still her mind, and body, but it kept coming back. She couldn't sleep, and headed out of her room. She put on her scarf again but she took her time. She removed the lock with her hooves, and closed the door behind her as she stepped outside.

The wind was calmer, but the skies were still dark as she looked up. She walked down the concrete steps, but she didn't need to stop and reached the post-box in a much faster pace than earlier. Trixie closed her eyes as she opened the box, but much like before it was empty.

She stood and looked out across the ocean. “Why am I even here?” she said. There hadn't been even one boat passing as long as she had been here. Trixie sighed, and walked back up the steps.

The door closed behind her, but Trixie looked confused at the door. “What the hay is going on?” she said into blank air, and she looked over the door, but couldn't find it. The lock was broken, and a key part was missing.

She sighed and took to the stairs again. “Maybe...” she said, but didn't finish her thought.

The light kept revolving, and shined its golden grace out across the darkness as Trixie exited the stairs. She didn't hesitate, and opened the metal door and walked out onto the platform. She took a deep breath, and sighed as her eyes brimmed with tears again.

Trixie supported herself against the railing as the wind increased again, and it was followed by a pitter-patter. “I... I can't do this any-more,” she said as she stepped onto the railing, and used a hoof to support herself against the top.

Don't do it. You have to keep up hope, her mind kept telling her, but Trixie shook her head. “No. Nopony wants me around. Just look at me! I'm alone, and abandoned on an island.” Her hooves wobbled as the wind howled.

Not true. You're the great and powerful Trixie! her mental pony shouted to her, but all that Trixie saw was the laughing and angry faces of Ponyville residents as they pointed, and laughed at her. She felt dizzy, and she lost her footing as her body plunged off the railing.

Trixie's vision blurred, and darkened.

***

At first she felt numb, but then she screamed and clutched her sides. Trixie turned over on her back, and opened her eyes. She saw light streaking across the sky, but something felt different. The pain vanished as fast as it had come.

Trixie felt heat emanating from behind her. She turned, and got onto her hooves. “W-what are you?” she asked the white figure in front of her. It didn't answer as her whole world fell apart. The lighthouse, the island, and the weather all vanished and left her in stark white.

“You're far on your way, but you need to make the final move,” the white figure of light said as a yellow door appeared in front of Trixie.

“T-Twilight?” Trixie said as she looked at the figure.

“No. I've chosen this voice since you will recognize it,” the figure said, and nodded towards the door. “I've helped you this far, but you and you alone have to walk through the door,” the pony of light added as she vanished.

“What do you mean?” she shouted into the whiteness as she clutched together and flared her horn.

“You died four days ago,” the voice boomed from all around her.

Trixie shook, and had trouble staying upright. “N-no...”

“You froze to death in the Everfree forest. No one came to your rescue, but here you can be safe,” the being kept talking, but Trixie didn't respond. She fell to the ground and clutched her ears. “N-no... it can't be true!”

“I'm afraid it is, but don't worry. There are friends here, and family,” the voice said as it turned towards a gentler tone.

“B-but... I don't want to die... can't I live?” Trixie asked the whiteness and dried her cheeks.

“It's the end. We don't get to choose when it arrives,” the whiteness surrounding Trixie said. She didn't reply, and just looked at the door.

“It's... it's not fair!” Trixie screamed into the void ahead of her as her voice filled with anger.

“Life isn't fair,” the voice said as Trixie tried to get up onto her hooves.

She shook, and looked at the door as she took a cautious step forward. “W-what's behind that door?”

“Your friends and family,” the voice boomed.

Trixie looked at the door and dried her cheeks. She moved forward, and hovered her hoof above the doorknob. She exhaled heavily and held her breath.