Don’t Look Away
Moondancer sat at her old wooden desk, the glow of the candlelight streaking across it. Her eyes were growing heavy from the many hours of studying. She was reading what seemed to be the 14th book on quantum mechanics when she heard a loud knock on the door. She grumbled to herself as she slowly got out of her seat and went to the door. How could anypony be up at this hour!? Probably another one of those annoying salesponies. She always seemed to get them at the most inopportune time.
She took a deep breath as she opened the door and was greeted by a yellow unicorn mare.
“Lemon Hearts?”
“Moondancer! I haven’t seen you for a week. You’ve been okay?” Lemon Hearts said with a tinge of concern.
Moondancer sighed. “I’ve been fine. Just have a lot going on for… obvious reasons.”
“I understand. May I come inside?”
“Be my guest.”
Lemon Hearts trotted into Moondancer’s quaint abode, almost tripping over strewn out books… twice. And to think it actually manages to look better than a week ago.
“Pardon the mess. I’m still trying to clean this place up and move into Twilight’s old library. Some tea, perhaps?” Moondancer asked.
“I’d love some.”
“Feel free to make yourself at home.” Moondancer responded as she trotted into her drabby kitchen. She only really used the kitchen for tea and the occasional bagel. A nerd’s gotta eat after all. As she began brewing the tea, her mind drifted on the events of this past week.
She knew what friendship was. She knew what to do. But where does she start? How could she possibly redeem herself after all the pain she’s caused? The past week was filled with these kinds of struggles. Whenever she tried to make a new friend, she’s come off as just an awkward nerd who seems out of touch with reality. She broke down crying twice already. If Twilight said that friendship was magic, then why does it come off as so hard?
She sighed as she brought the brewed tea into the main room and handed a cup to Lemon Hearts.
“Chamomile. Know it’s your favorite.” Moondancer stated as she sat in an old worn-out chair.
“Thanks.” Lemon Hearts responded.
“So, why’re you here this late at night?”
“I just wanted to check on you. Make sure you’re doing okay. I’m here this late because I want this to be private. Just between us.”
“Right. Well I guess I’m doing okay…
“Are you?” Lemon Hearts asked with a tinge of suspicion.
Moondancer gave a sigh.
“Okay, fine! I’m not! In fact, I’m the exact opposite of fine!” Moondancer exclaimed.
“This is about Twilight, isn’t it?” Lemon Hearts responded.
“It is…”
Moondancer tugged at the sleeves of her sweater awkwardly. “I just don’t get it! Why does it have to be such a chore to make friends?! Why do I come across as just some uptight egghead who only cares about the astrological convergence of magical energy!?”
Lemon Hearts sipped at her tea. It’s always the quiet ones who get agitated the most.
“Why do you think you’re so awkward, Moondancer?”
“Have you seen how I act around ponies I don’t know?” Moondancer responded.
“I haven’t even seen you at all this past week. Have you even tried talking with other ponies?” Lemon Hearts asked.
“I tried talking with somepony I met on my way to the library. Stallion about the same age as me. He seemed to be a writer, so I thought that would be a perfect match for me. I tried talking with him, I really did, but he just scoffed and walked away.”
“Well maybe he was just having a bad day.” Lemon said.
“It wasn’t just him. Most ponies I’ve tried to talk to has just passed me by. And the ones I’ve managed to talk with, have just ended as awkwardly as they began.” Moondancer said as she took another sip of her tea.
“Making friends. It’s easier said than done. I often at times have no idea what to say, I stutter a lot, and to top it all off, it takes time off of my reading. I have a 500-page library book due in two days for Celestia’s sake!”
“‘Pottery and Millennia’ by Jade Sculpt?” Lemon Hearts asked.
“That’s the one. Have you seen the work she’s made? It’s absolutely exquisite!” Moondancer chimed.
“I have! I love the sculpt she made of the pits of Tartarus. So haunting! And don’t even get me started on her vase depicting the reign of King Sombra. It’s absolutely beautiful!”
“Oh sweet Celestia it’s absolutely marvelous!” Moondancer responded with a squee. “ I just love how the colors clash with each other, symbolizing the struggle of a fallen empire.”
“Oh my gosh I just love that one!” Lemon Hearts exclaimed.
They paused for a second.
“Um, I think we got off track.” Moondancer stated awkwardly.
“Really? Because it seems like you managed to hold a pretty decent conversation there.”
Moondancer sat there confused. “Lemon Hearts, you’re my friend. I’ve known you since we were fillies. Of course I’m going to be comfortable talking to you.”
“That is true. However, it’s definitely a start.” Lemon Hearts responded.
“We’ve had conversations like this all the time. How is this a start?”
“Let’s look at it this way. We talked about something we both like, correct?” Lemon asked.
“Correct.”
“And that’s the key. You find out what you both enjoy. That’s one of the main keys to friendship. That’s how we met, as a matter of fact. Me and you were both so interested in magic.” Lemon Hearts said with a reassuring smile.
Moondancer’s mind flashed back to her young age.
~
She must’ve been about six or seven. She had no glasses, no sweater, and not a single frizz to her mane, but she was still the same old egghead she’s always been. Even in her young age, she was practically a walking encyclopedia. Not a care in the world aside from taking care of her library books. She rarely, if ever talked, unless she knew the answer to a question in class, which she always did.
But she was alone.
No one but the words of Starswirl on old parchment.
She was always written off as one of those shy unicorn eggheads who only cared about books and the theoretical principles of magic. No one dared to approach her, and she didn’t dare approach anypony.
After all, who would want to be with a crabby egghead like her.
Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns lived up to its name. All the ponies in the lower levels had already mastered telekinesis by the time they first joined. Moondancer was no exception. While she never dabbled in advanced spells that often, she could definitely prove to be a skillful magician.
Today was like any other day. Boring, dull, and a whole a lot of nothing. Moondancer sat in the school cafeteria reading a large book well above her reading level. What it was about, she could not remember. Probably about the physiology of the horn or some other boring crap. She ran a hoof through her perfectly straight mane and turned to page 457. After a minute, she turned to the next. And then the next. And the next. And the next. Rinse and repeat until the day is done.
She didn’t even notice the pony who suddenly came up and sat next to her.
“Hey!”
She looked over. Oh, it was THAT pony. The one who got her head jammed into the Erlenmare flask a month ago. She rolled her eyes.
“Hello, Lemon Hearts.” She said with a monotone voice, hoping the conversation would end soon.
“What are you reading?” Asked Lemon.
Oh great. It’s THIS question again. She was probably asked this about five times a day, and each time she gave the exact same answer.
“A book.”
Followed by the same reply.
“Oh. Which one?” Lemon asked.
“Why do you care?” Moondancer asked, visibly irritated.
Lemon Hearts was taken aback by the sudden outburst.
“I-I’m sorry.” Lemon Hearts stuttered.
Moondancer sighed. “It’s okay. I just don’t like talking to other ponies.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know. It just makes me feel awkward…”
Lemon Hearts looked at her, puzzled. But ponies loved talking with each other. How could she find it “awkward”?
“I just wanted to ask you something.” Lemon Hearts said.
“What is it?”
“How did you get so smart?” Lemon Hearts asked.
“Isn’t everypony here smart?” Moondancer responded.
“Well, yes, but you’re, like, super smart!”
“I’m not that smart…” Moondancer said hesitatingly.
“Yes you are! What’s 456 times 8?”
After a few seconds of pondering, she found the answer.
“3,648”
“What’s the formula for magical equivalency?”
Again, she found the answer.
“Magic equals mass times force cubed.”
“I fly when I am born, lie when I am alive, and run when I am dead. What am I?”
Again, she found the answer without breaking a sweat.
“A snowflake.”
“See, you know a lot in that old noggin of yours!”
Moondancer blushed a little bit.
“T-Thanks.” Moondancer said.
Lemon Hearts giggled.
“What do you want to be when you grow up?” she asked.
By now Moondancer seemed a bit less tense. Testing her mind brought some peace over her.
“A writer.”
“Ooh. What do you want to write about?”
“Magic.”
“Well, you’re certainly in the right place.” Lemon Hearts said.
Moondancer gave a little chuckle.
“Who’s your favorite magician?” Lemon Hearts asked.
“I love Petalwing. She’s written so much good stuff.”
“Oh my gosh I love her too!”
They talked like this for a while. Moondancer wasn’t particularly comfortable with it, but this Lemon Hearts pony was quite friendly.
~
“Petalwing was pretty great.” Moondancer said with a smile.
“Indeed. Anyways, you get what I’m saying?”
“I guess. But that doesn’t help how uncomfortable it makes me feel.” Moondancer said with a tinge of sadness.
“I understand that, Moondancer. This will take time. Like all things that we learn, it comes with patience.”
Moondancer sighed. “Are you sure? I just… don’t feel any joy when talking to other ponies. I feel like I’m doing a rigorous chore more than anything. If friendship is magic, then why do I struggle and hate doing it.”
“Friendship is magic because it takes time to learn, just like real magic. It will be hard at first, but with time, you will know what to do.” Lemon Hearts reassured.
“I… I see what you’re getting at. But in a way, this feels like a hardest kind of magic to learn, and that’s saying something.” Moondancer said with a stammer. She shuffled her hooves awkwardly.
“Which is precisely why it’s so important. There’s an old saying often used by those who study magic. You get out of it…”
“...what you put in.” Moondancer finished.
“Exactly! If you work hard at this, expect great results.”
“I see what you mean. But what if it still doesn’t work out?” Moondancer asked.
“Don’t expect results instantly. When studying something, you get your results after a long time of practicing. The same goes for friendship.”
Moondancer finished her tea. “I’ll see what I can do.”
Lemon Hearts smiled. “Great! I hope it goes well!”
“Thanks again, Lemon. You’ve always been a great friend. Even during my apathetic phase. I truly mean that.”
“Anytime, Moondancer. You got this.”
Moondancer gave a light blush and smiled. Lemon Hearts got up and gave her a hug, making her blush even harder. She hugged back.
“And please, for the love of Celestia, get a new sweater and fix those glasses.”
~One Month Later~
Moondancer took a deep breath and adjusted her glasses as she gathered up the courage to knock on the blue oak door.
Knock knock knock knock
After a few moments, a green unicorn mare with an orange mane opened the door.
“Moondancer! How’s it been?” she said with a smile.
“Um… I’ve been great, Firecracker Burst. I’d just thought I’d check up on you.” Moondancer said with a tinge of awkwardness.
“Well come inside and make yourself at home.”
Moondancer trotted inside. The humble abode had clearly seen better days. Scorched papers were strewn in random places. Certain items had black burn marks on them. There was even a melted pot of flowers by the windowsill. The entire room smelled of burning sulfur. Of course, given Burst’s occupation as a pyrotechnic, this was to be expected. Moondancer didn’t mind though. She was no stranger to these kinds of experiments
So far so good. Just stay calm.
“Are you getting settled in Twilight’s old library okay?” Burst asked.
“I still have a few piles of books to move and whatnot, but I’m getting there.”
“Good. Any plans for your old home?” Burst asked.
“Uh… I’m honestly not sure.” Moondancer said with an awkward grin.
“You okay? You sound a bit uncomfortable.” Burst said with a tinge of concern.
“I’m fine. I really am. I’m just still trying to get the hang of this whole friendship business.”
“Right. Have you found any other friends besides me?”
“As of yet, no…” Moondancer said sheepishly.
“Don’t worry. You’ll get the hang of it eventually.”
“I know… It’s just a bit harder than I thought.” Burst said as she sat down on the couch.
“I understand. Just take your time and it’ll come with ease soon enough.”
“Thanks. Hey, uh, mind if I use your bathroom?” Moondancer asked.
“Go right ahead. Down the hall and second door on the left.”
Moondancer trotted down the hall and went to the second door on the left. The entire bathroom smelled of burnt plastic. She turned on the water faucet and washed her face. “You were doing so well! And you had to go and mess it up with your stupid stammering! She probably thinks you’re upset or something. You’re such a failure!” She thought. She sighed and dried off her face. Okay, don’t worry. You can get through this if you just remain calm. She adjusted the sleeves of her sweater and went back to the living room.
“Oh, you’re back. Sorry it smelled so bad. I was experimenting with something earlier.” Burst said.
Moondancer wondered what could possibly warrant experimenting in a bathroom, especially involving fire. She shrugged it off. Burst was always experimenting in odd places.
“Anyways, how’ve you been?” Burst asked.
“I’ve been okay, but I’d like to ask you something important, Burst.”
“Oh? And what’s that?”
“I know it’s only been a month since we first met, but have I been a good friend to you?”
Burst was a bit confused. Of course she had a been a good friend, a great friend even.
“Of course you have.” Burst answered.
“Be real with me. Is there anything I can do better?”
“You’re pushing her, Moondancer. Stop doing that.You’re going to make her feel bad.” a part of her mind exclaimed.
Burst wasn’t sure how to respond to that. She didn’t want to make her upset. Nothing really struck her as a serious problem. Maybe she was a bit awkward at times, but she is new to this whole friendship business.
“N-Not really. You seem to be doing fine.” Burst said.
Moondancer took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I’m just making this even more awkward.”
“No no no. Don’t be sorry. It’s good that you’re asking this. You’re still learning, and this is a healthy thing to do.”
“I see what you mean. Although asking questions isn’t what I normally do. Whenever I study something, I understand it right away. Friendship is… very different however.” Moondancer said.
“Indeed it is. It’s not like science or math where you can learn from reading books. Friendship revolves around your own experiences. It’s what brings other ponies together and in a way, is more important than book smarts.”
“I suppose you’re not only a pyrotechnic, but also a philosopher.” Moondancer said with a smile.
The two shared a chuckle.
“I see what you mean. My studies are important, but friendship is the most important thing to study of all.” Moondancer said.
“Exactly! See, you’re getting the hang of it!” Burst exclaimed.
Moondancer gave a light blush and smiled.
“You’ll get the hang of it. I know you will.” Burst said.
“Thanks, Burst.” Moondancer said as she adjusted her glasses.
“Still haven’t fixed your glasses?” Burst asked.
“I’ve been meaning to do it for a while now. I’ve just been very busy lately, so I haven’t found the time to do it.”
“It’s been like that for a couple of months now. You sure there’s not a repairing spell you could use on it?” Burst asked.
“There is. Only problem is that it’s surprisingly hard to do.”
“Really? Doesn’t sound like it would be particularly complex.”
“It involves a bit of molecular manipulation and bonding, something which can be very tricky to pull off.” Moondancer explained.
“Right. I see what you mean. I’ve dabbled with that, being a pyrotechnic and all.”
“I should probably get going, Burst. I’d love to stay longer, but the library closes in an hour and my book is almost overdue.” Moondancer said.
“Alright. Take care, and remember what I told you.”
“I definitely will. Goodbye.” She said as she trotted out the door.
“Farewell!”
The door closed behind her as she took a breath of fresh air as she trotted away from the house.
“Sounds like somepony is busy making friends.” A voice behind her said.
She turned around and saw the grinning face of Lemon Hearts.
“Oh, yeah. That. Well, I’ve only really made one friend so far.” She said with a blush.
“Well, it’s certainly a start, that I can tell you.” Lemon Hearts said with a bright smile.
“I guess so.”
“I’m really proud of you, by the way. You definitely seem to be getting the hang of it.”
“Thanks, Lemon. You’ve definitely helped along the way, of course.”
They both shared a hug, relishing in their embrace.
“Also, get a new sweater and fix your glasses.”
Author's Note
I'd like to dedicate this story to all of my wonderful friends who have stayed with my through the past couple of years. You guys are what kept me going, and without you, I would have never discovered my passion for writing. Thank you so much. <3
And thank you for reading this story. It means a lot to me.
~Ponka