I’d brushed hooves with death twice during our journey. Each time I had, it brought a spike of startling clarity to my mind, serving as a reminder of how truly fragile I was. It made me subconsciously realize that I could die at any moment, through someone putting their will towards my end or even just a simple accident. It made me feel hopeless, like there was nothing I could do to prevent my demise, even if I didn’t realize it. It might’ve been a factor in how depressed I’d gotten when Tranquility and I fell out.

For some reason, that subconscious hopelessness became apparent to me as soon as that blood-red eye trained its gaze on me.

It was nothing compared to the sheer feeling of defeat that crushed me at that moment.

I felt as if a million bricks of despair had been dropped onto my shoulders, driving my heart to the ground and squeezing my hope right out of it. For the first time since we’d left Equis, I felt like we just couldn’t continue on, like it would be best to submit and take whatever was thrown at us.

Then, Cam squeaked and hugged my leg tighter.

And resolve filled me.

I didn’t fully understand why, but that little squeak of unadulterated terror filled me with determination. No one was going to hurt us. Nothing was going to harm my friends… or Cam. It occurred to me that I wasn’t exactly sure how to feel about her anymore, but I shoved that to the back of my mind. I stood up a little straighter and stared straight into the eye, a hint of anger blossoming in my mind.

“Actually, I’m fairly sure we made a wrong turn somewhere,” I said confidently. “We weren’t planning on attending your little party, and I’d appreciate it if you let us go on our merry way.”

I don’t know where that confidence came from, but it felt good.

The other reactions were mixed. Cam looked up at me with a mixture of shock and awe, loosening her death grip on my leg. Tranquility stood up a little straighter, seemingly reaching a similar state to what I’d found, and Reed facepalmed, letting out a soft whine. As for the voice…

“That was… different,” it said, the grinding, wet buzz taking on a curious tone.

“W-we are different,” Cam said, pulling away from my leg and standing between us. “We aren’t just gonna fall, or do whatever you want us to.”

“Shut up…” Reed whispered urgently. “Just stop talking!”

“No, it’s fine,” the voice said, amusement creeping into it. “It’ll just take some… adapting. Eventually, I’ll get you to join my little pity party. After all, all the others were just as reluctant as you… and they haven’t left yet!” Light flooded the area around us, and the bottom dropped out of my stomach.

The spectacle that lay before me was one I would never be able to purge from my mind.

There were hundreds of creatures, all arrayed in a grid-like pattern, similar to a statue garden, except that every single one of them was alive and breathing. Each one of them had an expression of unimaginable mental torture twisting their features. They all had tear streaks on their faces, with fresh ones spilling out of their eyes constantly… and the eyes themselves all conveyed a single, terrible message.

They showed pain. Pure, unbelievable pain.

I felt my confidence vanish without a trace, leaving despair in it’s wake. We’re screwed, I thought, feeling my legs start to tremble.

“They’re alive,” Reed whispered, horrified. “Every single one of them… they’ve been kept alive.” He took a hesitant step forward. “The Warriors… I can see them-” his voice caught in his throat, and he pointed straight ahead. “Jasmine!”

Following his finger, I saw a cloaked Mage. She was lanky and tall, her cloak making her appear bigger than she actually was, but that wasn’t what struck me the most. Her hood covered her eyes, but it didn’t stop her tears from flowing. Her mouth and throat were convulsing in a way that made it extremely apparent she was crying.

“What have you done?” Reed whispered, a tinge of anger in his voice. “What are you?”

“Your host,” the voice answered. “That’s all you need to know.”

“Why would you do this?” he asked, his voice growing stronger.

A low grumble echoed through the area, sounding a bit like laughter. “You four truly are the odd bunch. Inquisitive, suspicious, and reluctant. To answer that question, it’s from my amusement. I find it… intriguing, the way you creatures react to being confronted with your worst memories. It’s quite fascinating, really.”

“So it is memorybreak,” he said, his ears pressing flat against his head. “That’s what happens here.”

“I suppose we should get to the formal induction into my group, yes?” the voice asked, completely ignoring him. ”After all, if one appears odd on the outside… what could they hold within?”

“A-actually,” I stammered, raising a hoof shakily. “I’d prefer if we skipped tha-”

The red eye snapped towards me, locking it’s piercing, malicious gaze with my own. I felt something slip into my mind, a mental probe of sorts, worming its way through my thoughts like a virus. Unbidden, terrible memories began flashing in front of my eyes- an elementary school teacher hitting me, my parents having a bad fight, my many spats with my friends, and, overshadowing it all, the memory of the poor Song disintegrating before my eyes.

I stumbled backwards, blinking frantically, and the probing vanished. Panic and confusion raced through me, sending my heart rate through the roof. What just happened? I thought, starting to shake slightly.

“Interesting… you’ll be a tough case,” the voice murmured.

“What did it do to you?!” Tranquility yelled, running towards me and wrapping me in a hug.

“I d-don’t know,” I stuttered. “M-memories started f-flashing in my mind, b-bad ones…”

“Stay strong!” Reed yelled. “It’s trying to use them against you, to consume you in despair-” He broke off with a yip as the eye turned its attention towards him. He immediately shut his eyes and placed his paws against his temples, a faint shimmer of magic running along them.

“Unusual,” the voice commented, the buzz teeming with fascination. “You’ve made peace with most of your mistakes… but that’s not too much of an obstacle for me. You’ll join the rest… I’ll just enjoy making you submit more than I usually do.”

“Get out of my head,” he growled softly.

“Yeah!” Cam yelled, running up next to him, fear prominent in her voice.

“But of course!” the voice said, switching its gaze to her, causing her to squeak and trip, plowing into Reed’s side. “It comes with a price, though. An eye for an eye, tit for tat, you know? If I leave him alone, you better be willing to let me take a peek at your soul. And what a character you are! Letting your mistakes pile up, all the bad memories being shoved to the back of your mind, all so you can put your little sarcastic mask on? It’ll be all too easy to make you give in.”

Dread settled in my gut, a cold, dark mess that made me feel slightly sick. We don’t stand a chance, I realized. For all we tried to stand up to whatever that thing was, it didn’t seem bothered. In fact, it was toying with us, building on our fears, amplifying them, all for its amusement. We were nothing, and we could do nothing to stop what was coming. A sense of resignation joined the dread, and I clung to Tranquility just a bit tighter.

“Kuclo rel!” Tranquility yelled desperately. “Sul sce teiqua uros fenroilas, teich dae, uros fenroilas! Kuclo, dae hursaik, hursaik genrolas!”

“Strong words,” the voice said, breaking its hold on Cam. She started sniffling and crawled into Reed’s arms, shaking slightly. The eye flicked over to stare at Tranquility, and she went limp against me with a small squeak. “Let’s see if you’re one to talk-” The buzz broke off, and the eye blinked, widening slightly. “What’s this?”

“W-what’s what?” Tranquility asked shakily.

“I didn’t even brush your mind and I felt something,” the voice said. The eye appeared to squint for a few seconds before shooting open again from what appeared to be shock. “Oh-HO!”

“W-what’s it talking about, Tranquility?” I whispered.

“I don’t know,” she answered back.

“Severe emotional trauma at a young age,” the voice began in a whisper-like drawl. “It was neglected and shoved to the back of your mind, not because of fault of your own, but because you were told that it shouldn’t be brought up because it wasn’t important. Since then, it’s only grown worse, with mentions of several triggers compounding and condensing the scarring. The trauma has its fangs deep in your mind, and it’s shown in your recent interactions with your peers.”

“W-what?” Tranquility whispered, her pupils shrinking. I stared at her, begging for an answer as to what was going on, but it never came.

“It all serves to make you the simplest one to break,” the voice finished, glee permeating the buzz. “It’s been forever since I’ve encountered someone like you! I won’t even have to accentuate anything!”

“Thanks, I g-guess?” Tranquility stammered.

“It only seems logical to go after you first.”

My blood ran cold, and Tranquility paled in my grasp. “W-what?” she asked.

“It’s nothing personal,” the voice assured. “I just find that the creatures that are harder to make submit are the most FUN to break. You are going to be the easiest to make snap in your group, by far. And they say you should save the best for last… so you’re gonna have to be first. It’s just logic. You just have to come to terms with it, you filthy little batshit.”

My hooves flew to cover my mouth, my ears folding back and my eyes widening. No! I thought, horrified. The word batshit was a terrible slur towards thestrals, on a scale that most ponies couldn’t even comprehend. Tranquility briefly explained the history of it to me, and it was enough to make me feel insulted by it. It was coined by the gryphons back during the days of the three tribes. Something happened between them and the thestrals, probably a minor territory dispute, and the gryphons tried to commit genocide against them. They started using the term as a way to mock the thestrals before killing them. It stuck, and using that word against a thestral became associated with saying that they didn’t deserve to live. And to have that terrible phrase be used against Tranquility… it was maddening. A cold rage began to build in my gut, and I got to my hooves, glaring at the eye.

Tranquility, though…

She reeled back as if she’d been decked by a Royal Guard, letting out an audible cry of pain and stumbling back, shock in her eyes. My anger vanished, replaced by confusion and concern. Even though the phrase was the worst possible thing that could be said to a thestral, it didn’t seem right that Tranquility would have reacted so strongly. There was something I didn’t know about in play, and that was absolutely unsettling.

“Weh pourehasti du quri surai, weh pourehasti du zhaigai,” the voice buzzed, the eye fixating on her once more. “I do believe I understand why you cling to that phrase so much. I think the appropriate response would be… Peirehas quri ruscero ka scuro? Yes, that seems right.”

“You l-lie,” she hissed, starting to tremble as tears ran down her face.

It was then I realized something, something that made my heart skip a beat.

This creature, this entity, whatever it was, was a master at what it did. It could see into our minds, read through our memories like a picture book, and decide what was best to say to break us. Everything he’d said to Tranquility had a purpose, from calling her a batshit to saying things in her own language, and we could do nothing. We were simply playings to the creature, and that caused a feeling of hopelessness to sink into my soul.

“It does!” Reed yelled frantically, trying to calm Cam down. “It is a lie! Don’t listen to it! Stay strong!”

“I lie, you say?” the voice asked curiously. “What can you do to stop me, call for mama? You KNOW how that ended up the last time you tried that solution…”

Tranquility shook her head, more tears flowing down her face. The trembling in her legs increased to the point where she actually collapsed, crumpling to the ground. I scrambled over to her and pulled her into a tight embrace, desperately trying to help… but it didn’t seem like it did much at all.

“S-stop,” she whispered, shakily covering her ears. “P-please…”

“But where’s the fun in that?” the voice asked. “You’re being awfully resistant towards this… you’re trying to kill my fun. That makes me not like you very much… I might even hate you. What’s to stop me from doing the same thing as the last person that hated you?”

Tranquility froze, her gaze snapping to meet the eye’s. “No,” she whispered. “You wouldn’t. Y-you couldn’t!” A flash of alarm filled me as the voice started to laugh.

“But I can,” it chuckled, taking on a sinister tone. “Because in the end, there’s nothing you can do stop me, just like there was nothing you could do when it happened the first time. And since you doubt my capabilities so much… I think I will. And this time, it’s truly your fault. So watch it, Tranquility, and know that this is because of you!”

And with that, all of us except for Tranquility burst into flame.

It didn’t seem like real flame though. It was a pale, ghostly version of what I’d seen in real life, and didn’t appear to affect anything on us. The worst it did was give off a light tickling sensation, something actually a little pleasant. I could liken it to a poorly constructed illusion spell, which is probably what it actually was.

But it was enough.

Tranquility’s eyes went wide with pure, primal horror and fear. I saw her gaze become slightly glassy, as if she was unconsciously remembering something, and she let out a piercing scream, one filled with all of her terror, shock, and pain. It drew on longer and longer, lowering in intensity as her lungs ran out of air to give, until she finally had to take a breath. She broke down sobbing, her body going limp against me. When I caught a glimpse of her eyes, they had the same tortured, lifeless stare as all of the creatures who had been captured by the monster we faced before.

“NO!” I screamed, pulling her tight against me, shock and disbelief running through my veins. I didn’t want to believe it, but the voice had somehow driven Tranquility into the state it had with all the others, consumed by negative emotions to the point where she was unresponsive. It had done it with only a few pointed sentences, too. If I were a more self-centered pony, I would have been flooded with fear, fear about what would happen to me, but I wasn’t concerned about that. I was scared out of my mind for her. What did she remember?! I thought frantically. What could have done this?! Can it be fixed? PLEASE let it be fixable! More fear began to build. We’re all gonna end up like this. We’ll be worse than dead!

“Too easy,” the voice said nonchalantly. “Now… who was next?” The eye snapped over to Reed and Cam, fixating on the latter of the pair. “I believe it was you-”

“No,” she whispered, pulling out of Reed’s tight embrace. Her face was matted from her tears, but she still stared up defiantly at the eye. “Nobody’s next. We’re getting out of here.” A silence reigned for a few moments, with Reed staring at her, confused.

“Really,” the voice deadpanned.

“Yeah,” Cam said, her voice gaining a little power, and a small smirk appeared on her face. A small burst of hope rose up in me, and I pulled Tranquility’s limp, crying form against me a little tighter. “Because I realized something. We’ve got a way out of here. And that’s your fault, ‘cause you made my mind go in that direction.”

“You bluff,” the voice said dismissively.

“Nah, I don’t think I do,” Cam said. “I’m not gonna become a vegetable today. See ya later!” With that, she flashed out her paws. A powerful golden telekinetic aura surrounded Reed, Tranquility, and I, and before I knew it, I was yanked off my hooves and towards Cam. She jumped into the air, her box sliding underneath her, and fell into it, vanishing. A second later, the three of us followed. As my head passed through the entrance, I heard the voice gasp in surprise.

We fell into a thin corridor between two empty shelves. I never loosened my hold on Tranquility, though, even when we hit the ground.

“What happened to her?!” Cam yelled, running towards us.

“Memorybreak,” Reed whispered, horrified. “True memorybreak. That thing turned her worst experiences against her and used it to crush her. I’ve never seen it before…”

“So this is m-my fault,” Cam whispered, tears building up in her eyes.

“What?” Reed asked, aghast at the very suggestion. “No! Why would it be?”

“B-because I-I didn’t get us out of there fast e-enough!” she wailed, the tears starting to flow. “I-I forgot about this p-place and a-as a result T-tranquility had t-this happen and it’s my f-fault!” She leaned against the shelves and slid to the floor, sobbing.

“Sweetie, no…” Reed said, walking over to her and picking her up. “That’s not true… you’ve had a really rough day. Let’s walk and talk about it, okay?” Cam nodded, not making any move to get out of his grasp. The two of them walked away from Tranquility and I, leaving us alone.

I started to nuzzle her, going over her face, neck and chest, but it didn’t change anything. She still silently cried, staring blankly off into the distance. A feeling of hopelessness started to build within me. Please be fixable! I thought frantically, tightening my hold on her.

“T-tranquility,” I began, my voice a feeble, stuttering whisper. “I-I don’t know what t-that thing did to you. I d-don’t know what it showed you, o-or what most of w-what it said meant… but that d-doesn’t matter. I-I don’t care what it did. I-I just want you back… I just got you b-back, and I don’t want to lose you a-again!” I pulled away, looking into her eyes… and saw nothing. There was no change.

I couldn’t help it. I began to cry, letting my head fall forward. It was just too much. I’d gotten a taste of hope when Reed had saved Tranquility and we’d made up… only to have that hope snatched away when Ivy had chased us through the multiverse, using Reed’s signature to track us down. Then, we’d been dragged into the worst possible place we could’ve ended up, and now we were trapped in a box, with Cam crying her eyes out over something that wasn’t even her fault, Tranquility in an unresponsive, depressed state with me desperately trying to revive her, and Reed trying desperately to hold us all together.

I cried for a long time, letting my tears soak Tranquility’s chest. Eventually, I stopped, a cold, dead feeling settling into my soul. The sound of the world around me seemed to become muted, and the sound of my heartbeat became amplified. I leaned forward onto Tranquility a little more, the cold feeling growing and starting to deaden my other senses.

I was almost too consumed by my sadness to hear it.

“F-fall…”

Author's Note

God, that was annoying to reformat.

Thestral Language Guide

~Pyrepinna

Next chapter... some things get explained.