An Ace_Attorneyfan in Equestria

by ace_attorneyfan800

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, Dark, Alternate Universe, Human, Sad, Romance
Length: 1843

It's crazy. This whole thing is crazy. I mean, what's so special about me? I'm just a teenager. A teenager who's been through what has to be the worst of his life. I thought I finally did it. I thought I finally ended it all. But nope. I was wrong...

Wow. So. Here I am. It's crazy. This whole thing is just crazy. I mean, what's so special about me? I'm just a teenager. A teenager who's been through what has to have been the worst of his life. And, well, you know what? I thought I finally did it. I thought I finally ended it all after years of chickening out. Ended all the suffering that had been me since I was in third grade. But… nope. Death's got other plans for me apparently. Like as if he thought I never suffered enough while I was alive. I was wrong… Now I'm stuck here. In Equestria. With no one else I could particularly call a friend. More like acquaintances. Making friends is supposed to be the best thing in a person's life, but how can it be when the lives of everyone around you are slipping away, like an hourglass? But when I was alive, I always kept wondering how many more times I would be allowed to make mistakes, have to tell the same lies, have to watch my loved ones die, watch my dear friends either disappear or leave me one by one, and just… be alone once again. These ponies…. they say they care for me, but how do I know they're telling the truth? The last one who told me that gave me a scar that has lasted a long time…

(I gave in. I did a self-insert. To be honest, I've always thought about doing one, but never really gave myself the time to do it. So… This is my attempt. Also, don't give me that look. Admit it, people you've either thought about doing one yourself at one point or actually did it too. So sit back and enjoy a look into my psyche and how I would react upon being thrown into Equestria. I'll be it not exactly in a pretty way.)
(Also Alternate universe tag is there for just in case)

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2016-11-03 00:27:29 UTC

Every Story Has its Beginning....

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The time was 20:44 military time. That's 8:44 p.m for all you civilians. I don't know what day it was and I didn't care. I know tomorrow's just another school day. Another day to go to English III, do nothing in 2nd period A.C.T Math Prep, get confused as hell in Chemistry, actually have a blast in JROTC, and watch as my grades are complete shit in U.S. History. Well, I'll have time to dwell on that tomorrow. Well... if I even live to see tomorrow with what I plan on doing anyways. I sat in my office chair looking at nothing but my small room that had trash, clothes, paper, or coins scattered everywhere. I then looked at myself. I was wearing my Flash Sentry shirt that I bought online along with my blue jeans, white socks, and black converse sneakers. since it had become nighttime I was practically forced to wear one of my many jackets. Well in this case though I picked a leather jacket that I customized to look like Flash Sentry's jacket. I was tossing around a can of blue spray on hair dye and just bored out of mind since I couldn't exactly sleep. This was something I had been planning on for a long time now. I always manage to get to the end point, but just can't do it. Now... I don't need any more proof to know I have to do this.

I stopped fumbling around with the can and took off my shirt and jacket and sprayed my whole hair and eyebrows blue before putting my shirt and jacket back on. I put the can in my now emptied of its content backpack which was in a bad condition. I went to the fridge and took out a few bottles of Mnt. Dew Baja Blast drinks and placed them into my backpack. I had then gone into the water room and unplugged my recently fully charged Samsung Galaxy S3 touch phone before placing it on my bed and putting the charger into my backpack. I event went to my computer desk and pulled out a few Tabasco flavored Slim Jims and added them to my backpack before getting a blank sheet of paper and writing down a letter and placing it in the kitchen. Sighing I went back into my room and from a drawer on my computer desk pulled out a Beretta M9 as well as two fully loaded cartridges. Taking the one I loaded the gun and placed the other into my backpack. I might be only 17 but I know a few people. But then I looked at two very dark blue boxes. The two boxes, in general, were about the size of a ring box but one was slimmer and a bit longer. One held my class of 2018 ring on it and the other was my class tag. I thought about it for a moment before putting them into my backpack.

But then I took a look at my bed. It had MLP stuff all around it. MLP pillows, MLP sheets, MLP quilt, etc. even a few plushies as well. I looked at them before placing them into my backpack. If I was going to do this, I was gonna do it with those friends I had left. Then, I took one long look at my Espeon plushie. I looked at it long and hard before zipping up my backpack and placing it on my back picking up my gun and then Espeon. I listened as Memory from Undertale played in my head.

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It's strange, being able to know a track and actually listening to it without having to pull it up. Heh...... I then left my room, turned out the light, and left my grandparent's house into the middle of the night. I walked into the forest with no light to guide me except for my phone's flashlight. Finding a good open clearing I sat down on the ground with Espeon cradled in my arms.I turned my phone off and pulled out my holstered gun and placed it against my forehead. If I was going to die, I was going to do it dying with the last things few things I loved in the world. Closing my eyes, I felt a single tear run down my cheek as I pulled the trigger......

I... woke up. I woke up to a splitting headache. I opened my eyes to see I was in what appeared to be a dark room, but I did have a light shining over me letting me see I still had my Beretta M9 and Espeon in my arms as well as my backpack filled with stuff and every piece of clothing I wore before I died. But in spite of everything, only one question came to my head. Where was I? Was I dead? Is this what happens to people who die? Suddenly I felt a lot lighter and found myself floating and heading towards the light. Was I ascending to heaven or wherever? Suddenly I heard a massive roar and looked to see the darkness coming after me as I got closer to the light. I'd shoot at it, but I don't even know if that will even hurt it. Suddenly my legs felt like they were in pain. I looked to see the darkness had overtaken my lower legs as the light came ever so close. My whole lower section felt like it was about to tear off but I didn't care, I had entered the light. I was finally free.

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"He seems to be stable,"

Wh... what? Th... the hell? Who's voice was that? And... is that a fucking heart rate monitor going off?

"I-I just don't know what happened to him, though!"

That last voice. That last one sounded kind of familiar. But... where have I heard it from? Squirrel and Hedgehog? Probably not. She'd be speaking Korean if it was that... wait what?

"Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard,"

Am... I still alive? Nah! How could I be? I blew my own brains out!

"It looks like an attempted suicide that failed,"

Failed?! How?! When the brain dies the body dies! Unless you're Postal Dude who just straight up ignores the real world.

"You should be lucky you found him. He probably would've actually died had you not found him,"

Actually died?! I did die! .... Um... I think? Is this hell? Is this literal hell? Well, at least it proves that the whole hell is fire and brimstone thing is bullshit like it is. And also I expected this considering what I did. Hell, I'm an Athiest and I STILL knew I was going to hell. Wait what was I thinking again? Wait what the hell am I doing?! I need to wake up! NOW- oh never mind. I opened my eyes, finally, and managed to get a good look at my surroundings. My eyes went wide as my breathing quicken and the heart rate monitor went crazy.

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"WHAT THE?! HOW THE?!" I yelled getting the attention of the doctors and scaring Fluttershy, "HOW?! WHAT?! WHY?! WHERE AM I?!"

I think I had an idea and I just wanted to make sure.

"Sir, sir, please calm down!" The doctor pony said rushing over to me, "You're in Ponyville Hospital just calm down!"

"CALM DOWN?! CALM DOWN?!"

I coughed before continuing sitting up and looking at the ceiling. Yelling really loudly hurt my throat.

"HOW CAN I BE CALM?! I JUST FUCKING DIED! HOW IN THE HELL AM I STILL ALVE?!" I shouted, "GOD, JESUS, SATAN, MORGAN FREEMAN I DON'T CARE WHO, JUST WHY?! WHY?! WILL YOU JUST LET ME END MY DAMNED LIFE?! ENOUGH'S ENOUGH ALREADY!"

I coughed again but this time in a bit of a coughing fit as I heard the door open up. I looked to see Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, and Starlight 'Mother Fucking Stalin' Glimmer come into the room. My rage reached its peak when I saw Twilight. There was no other explanation, she HAD to have been the one who did this to me!

"YOU!" I shouted pointing at Twilight and getting out of bed, "YOU DID THIS TO ME! WHOA!"

I fell forwards onto the floor. Guess I haven't exactly gotten my legs back. Either way, I continued my rant.

"What?!" Twilight said out of shock.

"DON'T GIVE ME THAT BS! YOU DID THIS TO ME AND YOU KNOW IT!" I shouted as the doctors helped me up and tried to put me back into bed, "I WAS ON THE VERGE OF FINALLY ENDING IT ALL WHEN YOU RUINED IT! YOU PULLED ME FROM MY WORLD DIDN'T YOU!?"

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Twilight shouted.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH, YOU GOD DAMNED LIAR!" I shouted.

I've read enough fan fiction to know this was most likely either Twilight's doing, Celestia, or Discords. The more likely choice though being Twilight. She had to have done this to me.

"Hey lay off her bub!" Rainbow Dash threatened.

"YOU STAY OUT OF THIS YOU WALKING LESBIAN PRIDE PARADE FLOAT!" I shouted at Rainbow Dash.

That quickly made her step down. Yeah, I tend to say some things whenever I'm a bit mad or angry or pissed off to no end.

"He's going crazy!" The doctor said, "Quick get me an anesthetic!"

"I WANT ANSWERS AND I WANT THEM NOW!! YOU FUCKING BASTARD!!" I shouted at Twilight.

It wasn't until I felt a clonk on my noggin that my head started getting wobbly and I found myself asleep once again.

I awoke to find myself still at the hospital. I shook my head and heard the beeping of the heart monitor as its vitals read normal and continued on with its life. I grabbed a nearby metal tray and slapped it across my face just to make sure I wasn't dreaming. Nope. I was awake. I placed the metal tray back where I found it and then looked in a mirror across from where I was at. My head was wrapped up and red from where my brains were blown out. I just couldn't believe it. I actually somehow survived blowing my own brains out... I had so many questions going through my head at once I just didn't know what to ask first. I then heard the sound of a door open up and in came the mane 6 as well as Starlight. All I did was look as they surrounded my bed.

"Ummm. Can I help you?" I asked confused as hell.

"Please, sir-"

"My name's Tivon." I deadpanned, "And before you even start saying it wrong it's pronounced 'Ti-ven'."

"Well, um, Tivon, we'd like to ask you a few questions," Twilight asked.

"Well seeing as how I can't possibly go anywhere I'll answer them," I said with a sigh.

This is going to be a long day.