Sleepless

by Saberking2012

Rating: everyone
Tags: Sad
Length: 1627

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2016-11-04 05:43:12 UTC

Acceptance

I abruptly awoke with a loud gasp, sweating profusely. I grasped at my chest and panted heavily in an attempt to calm my thundering heart. A less than effective approach but one that worked after a few seconds. Now somewhat calm, I surveyed my surroundings, making sure that the "reality" I just escaped from was no longer still in effect. To my instant relief, everything seemed to be normal and Applebloom was still asleep beside me. I turned towards the tiny bedroom dresser next to the bed and squinted at the alarm clock to check the time, a not so easy task since I was half awake. It looked like it was about three in the morning but that was all I could make out.

Going back to sleep was out of the question. That much was for certain. Sure, I knew that it was highly unlikely I would experience the same frightening image if I were to simply go back to sleep but I simply couldn't force myself to overcome the fear, a fact that shamed me deeply. I should be above such…such childish trepidation! Shouldn't I?

Throwing off my side of the blanket in frustration, I made my way out of the bedroom, making sure not to wake my cousin as I opened and shut the door behind me as quietly as I could. I didn't even bother to put on some slippers, finding them unnecessary for what I wanted to do. Upon entering the hallway, I found comfort in the fact that, by the immediate looks and sounds of it, everypony in the  house was currently occupied in their rooms, asleep or otherwise, meaning that there'd be nothing to interfere in my small trek to the bathroom.

Well, almost nothing. I was so worried about waking up somepony that I barely noticed Winona, the family dog, curled up contently in the middle of the hallway, fast asleep. Before I did something careless, like stepping on him, I walked around him and continued to make my way to my destination.

Once there, I turned on the sink and splashed some water onto my face in an attempt to wake myself up. I gripped the sink hard and steeled my still shaky hooves as I looked at my reflection in the mirror, disgusted by the scared and timid version of myself that I saw. This didn't resemble somepony who could scoff in the face of such stupid fears and simply move past them, knowing that it wasn't real. Instead, what I saw looked like a scared filly who couldn't master my own fear despite knowing better. Well, this simply won't do!

"Babs, get a grip! You're better than this! Nightmares are nothing more than a imagine that wasn't real. It can't hurt you or anypony. Now go back to sleep so that in a few hours, everypony can see you as brave and not a crybaby!"

That seemed to do the trick as I closed the bathroom door behind me and made my way back to the room, my confidence seemingly restored. However, without any light to guild me, it would prove quite a challenge to see what was right in front of me. It wasn't a problem for me when I left to go to the bathroom since it was pretty straightforward but I would always get confused as to where her room was. It also didn't help that I was somewhat reckless in moving. This time, however, with my single-minded objective to get back to the room as quickly as possible, I found myself stepping on Winona's tail, resulting him in yowling in pain and scampering away, making me panic even more as I sped past. Without even thinking, I made a run for it, suppressing the urge to scream at the top of my lungs. I didn't want to be there any longer, wanting to run as far as I could down the hallway, right past the bedroom, and all the way at the end. I dropped to the floor and huddled close to the wall, whimpering and sniveling, fighting back tears from falling from my eyes but finding such a task doubtful and a pathetic display effort as I sobbed as quietly as I could. All I had to do was let this sorry excuse of a reaction run its course so I could go back to sleep, all while making sure not to alert anyone to my-

"Babs?"

I was suddenly enveloped in a bright light. I flinched immediately but calmed down as I figured out what was happening. I had wound up next to the hallway's former linen closet, now occupied by Applebloom's elder sister, Applejack, who had opened the door to her bedroom. I assume that she must have heard my pathetic weeping and came to check out what was going on outside of her room.

"Babs, what're you doing here? And more importantly, why are you up this late?"

'I could ask you the same question', was something I wanted to say back but found it unnecessary and crude, especially when she was just trying to look out for me. Still, I hated being put on the spot and just wanted for tonight's disaster to be over with and behind me. Plus, I hated having to seen in a weaker light, having decided that showing weakness would only hold everypony back. But just as I was about to find some way to deflect the conversation in my favor, I was stopped dead in my tracks by her keen observation.

"But more importantly, have you been crying? What's going on?"

I quickly tries to rub my face of the obvious tears but it was soon replaced by my face flushing after being caught so easily and in such a state of weakness, too. I just wanted the ground to swallow me up. It'd be much better than letting anypony see me like this, even if it was somepony I knew. I took pride in the fact that I was above being weak and defenseless by small things that everypony else would be taken by surprise. I didn't look down on them for it but I appreciated how my perspective on everyday occurrences made it so that I could power though it and deal with them rationally. But running about scared out of my wits? Huddling against the wall and crying? All because of a bad dream? It was completely out of character of who I was. To my surprise, while I was self-loathing in my mind, Applejack had somehow been able to figure out the bane of my dilemma.

"Lemme guess, you had a nightmare and you can't get to sleep 'cause you're scared, right?"

I looked up at her smiling, astonished at how easily she was able to pick up on things without me having to say a word. Admitting defeat, I looked down at the floor and meekly nodded, waiting for light scolding and perhaps even condescension to come forth, telling me how pathetic I was. Instead, she kneeled down on the floor in front of me, wrapping me in a hug. I was somewhat taken back from the gentle embrace and although I didn't return it, I silently thanked her for her kindness.

"It's okay. I've been there before. Heck, I still have bad dreams that keep me awake from time to time. It's nothing to be ashamed of, Babs. It's normal, just like everypony else to have a nightmare every once and a while."

It was then that I found irony in my attempt to retain my calm and tough personality; I found it beneath me to feel fear from something like haunting visuals that nightmares can produce yet denying the real effects of fear was irrational in of itself. For the first time since I woke up, I smiled and hugged her back.

"I really needed that, Applejack. You were of most help."

"No problem. Say, you wanna sleep with me for tonight? I don't mind. I've got plenty of space in my bed."

I had accepted the invite without hesitation as I allowed her to lead me into the room. She turned the lights off and I found myself in bed once again, covered by darkness. This time, however, I had somepony nearby to make me feel safe and secure. To my amusement, I found Applebloom's toy, snuggled up in her bed, no doubt more precaution on part of her thoughtful sister. It didn't take long, however, for me to think about all the teasing and bantering I'd get from everypony else if they found out about this. I would never hear the end of it. I cringed at the thought that this would give D.T and her friend in particular.

"Uhh…Applejack?"

"Yeah? What's up?"

"Would you...mind not telling the others about this?"

She responded by bringing me even closer to her until I was directly next to her.

"Sure. I understand. By the way, while we're on the subject of promises, mind if I make one of my own?"

"What would that be?"

"That we will always be here for you no matter what. You may live far away but you're still family and looking out for each other is what we do."

More tears threatened to spill from my eyes but this time, they would be out of joy. I may not have expressed myself with emotions as often as a little filly normally should but the sentimentality of her words was enough to for me to abandon my tough nature for once and snuggle myself even closer in her caress.

"Thank you. Goodnight, Applejack."

She leaned over to peck me on the forehead and laid back down.

"Goodnight, Babs."