Chapter One: A Good Chase
Author's Note
This is my first story, so please be nice or I'll make you find a chalkboard and write "I am jerk." 500 times in cursive. Also, feel free to point out any typos.
Color key is below.
Tight Grip
Twilight Sparkle
Rainbow Dash
Applejack
Rarity
Fluttershy
Pinkie Pie
Steven Magnet
Chapter One: A Good Chase
Chapter One: A Good Chase
Hi. I’m Tight Grip.
“GET BACK HERE!!!”
And right now I’m in a bit of trouble. The person currently yelling at me is Twilight Sparkle: Alicorn of Magic, Princess of Friendship, and all around nutcase. For some reason they all have some abstract concept that they’re in charge of, even that one in the empire (A princess in charge of an empire? Yeah, I don’t get it either.). As for why I said “person” instead of “pony”; my dad used to travel a lot, and found that using “pony” as a suffix in conjunction with “some-”, “any-”, “every-”, and “no-” gets offensive real quick around non-ponies. Am I rambling?
“STOP, THIEF!!!” *ZAP*
I’m rambling. I think I should back up a bit before I continue. I’m a unicorn. My dad, Quick Wit (also a unicorn), grew up in Canterlot, while Trouble Keeper, my mom (another unicorn by the way), grew up in Manehattan, like the bad part of Manehattan. They met while writing articles for different magazines. Long story short? They fell in love, dated for a while, got married, bought a house in Canterlot, and had me.
“Spread out! They have to be around here somewhere!”
I’m about average height and weight, brown eyes, dark blue coat with a dark red mane, and dark red hooves. My Special Talent? Well, basically it boils down to having a good grip; both literally and metaphorically. Metaphorically, this means that I have an easier time getting a good grasp on various situations. Literally, this means that while I know a few simple spells, what I’m really good at is Telekinesis and Divination magic. A lot of people will tell you that Divination is all about looking for “omens” in order to predict the future. These people may or may not be telling the truth, but I don’t know about that kind of stuff. What I do know is that if you know exactly what you’re looking for, you can take out a map, dangle something from a string or the like, and you can find out the subject’s current location.
I’m rambling again. The reason I’m being chased by Ponyville’s Finest-
“Raht. Ah’ll go this way. Pinkie, you go that way.”
“Righty-tighty, Jackie-wacky!”
Though I use the term “Finest” loosely-
“No, Pinkie! Not that way, the other way!”
Is both simple and complicated. The simple version: I stole a book from Twilight Sparkle’s library. The complicated version is that the book in question is my dad’s private journal. See, my dad used to study ancient civilizations for a living. This means that he sometimes found things that are either dangerous or have the potential to be dangerous if someone finds and uses them. That’s why the journal is private, and why a naive do-gooder like Twilight Sparkle can’t be allowed to see its contents.
Granted, it has a magic lock that should only open if me, my dad, or my mom use the key to open it, but I don’t believe for a second that Twilight I’m-gonna-go-take-on-a-mad-alicorn-with-no-back-up-and-little-to-no-combat-training Sparkle wouldn’t try to open it anyway. Best-case scenario; the journal gets destroyed. Worst-case scenario; she opens it and goes looking for these places and artifacts. If you think I’m worried about nothing, just ask a mare by the name of Trixie Lulamoon about the Alicorn Amulet sometime. She’ll tell you just how dangerous it is to go meddling with ancient artifacts. Or better yet, pick up a Daring Do book, any Daring Do book. I’ll bet you a month’s pay it mentions some centuries-old doomsday weapon or something like that.
As for how dad’s journal managed to find its way to Princess Crazy Crown? I don’t know, but I have a few ideas. To start with, someone would have to break into the safe Dad keeps it in. In other words, some shady character broke into Mom and Dad’s house, managed to crack both the physical and magical locks on the safe, grabbed the book, and managed to get away before anyone could catch them. From there, it splits. If they were evil jerks, they either (a) lost it somehow in such a way that it wound up in her royal insanity’s possession, or (b) they thought the same way I do and made sure it wound up in her possession, hoping she'd go off and try to do something.
If said perpetrator was another naive goody-goody, then it’s the same answer but with different motives. Essentially, if they’re a bad guy and they went with choice B, then they’re hoping she’ll get it open and run into something she can’t stop. But if they’re a good guy and went with choice B, then they think she can handle anything in the journal. Which is, of course, wrong.
“Did you see ‘em!?”
“No, consarn it!”
Either way, it doesn’t matter now, considering I just passed the tree line into the Everfree Forest. So long as I can lose them in there-
“WAIT! They're headed into the Everfree!”
...Dangit. Well, time to get the lead out. I’m just glad I’m already in the forest.
Author’s Note: In order to waylay confusion, it must be announced that from here on out the story shall be told in the past tense in order to add to the ease of writing this thing. Thank you, and please enjoy.
It was about ten minutes after I’d led them into the Everfree that I realized how they’d been following me despite not being able to see me. The pink earth pony, “Pinkie” unless I miss my guess, was a Trickster. A Trickster is a pony born with a knack for Wild Magic, and born with enough inherent Chaos Magic to make use of it. They usually start being able to do it around the time they get their cutie mark. But I’m rambling again. My point is that Tricksters are natural Clairvoyants. They get twinges or impulses that allow them to react to what’s happening around them accordingly.
Once I realized this, I reacted accordingly by pulling a necklace out of one of my saddlebags and hanging it around my neck. To the naked eye, it looked like a dream catcher. And, in a way, it was. You see, Clairvoyance requires you to literally let your mind wander; essentially turning one’s subconscious into a net for the things happening around you. This allows you to be aware of events around you. But by utilizing certain materials to make a dream catcher, you can keep someone from being aware of what you’re doing. Am I rambling again?
“Aww, man! I lost ‘em!”
“YOU WHAT!!?”
I’m rambling again. Fact of the matter is I was home free after that.
It was five minutes after I’d lost them that I came across something interesting; a small field of Poison Joke. Funnily enough, it has a lot of interesting uses besides as a natural deterrent. As I started collecting them in my Telekinesis, an idea began to form in my mind, followed by a grin on my face. I thought to myself
It was little bit later that I found my second fortuitous find of the day: a river. After taking a drink I used the water like a mirror as I readjusted my garb. I was wearing a full-body suit to cover my torso, hindquarters, and tail. On my head was a mask that fully covered my head, mane, and horn, but not so tightly that I couldn’t cast, (fun fact: if you grip a unicorn’s horn tight enough, they can’t cast spells) and a built-in pair of red-lensed goggles to hide my eyes. A hooded cloak finished off the look.
After exercising a bit of clairvoyancy, I reached down into the water with my Telekinesis, found what I was looking for, and pulled. This way shortly followed by a great splash as something rose from the depths.
“All right, who is the wise guy!?”
Said something was a rather large, purple, rather effeminate-sounding sea serpent with a well-groomed, orange moustache with a matching head of hair. After shaking myself out of it, I cleared my throat, dropped my voice two octaves, and called out in a clear Broncs accent:
“’Ey! Down heeya!”
He looked down. “Sorry ‘bout that!” I called out, “It was the only way I could think of to get youse attention. The name’s Dream Catcha! Wha’s yours?” He shook his head a little, blinked, and smiled.
“Well now! My name is Steven Magnet. To what do I owe the pleasure?”
“Well, tell the truth, I need a lil help with sumpthin’.”
“Oh?” he said as he scratched his head “Whatever did you have in mind?”
“Oh, youse know.” I grinned as I used my Telekinesis to start pulling a rope out of my saddlebags and thought .
“Jus’ a lil fava’.”
It was about two minutes away from the river that I found my would-be pursuers.
“Let’s just go back.” said the blue, and I assume tired, pegasus.
I thought to myself. .
I then inhaled, and yelled at the top of my lungs in my “Dream Catcher” voice:
“SO LONG SUCKAS!!!” Then I took off!
I ran back to the river with them hot on my tail, and managed to get across the river before they made it past the tree line. When they did, they froze stock-still. But then, the sight of a huge sea serpent suspended in mid-air, tied up, and covered in bright blue balls would do that to a lot of people. I then prepared to throw Steve.
“HEY, LOSAHS!!”
My name is Tight Grip.
“CATCH!!!”
And this is my situation.
