Smarity Has Left the Castle
Smarity Has Left the Castle
Rarity galloped from Twilight's castle of doom, Angry tears of betrayal streamed down her face, snot was running out of her
as fast as she was running away. Away from the hurt away from him, As strong as she was she wasn't ready for his stupid fat mouth.
Her trek finished at her bedroom vanity a fuming marsh mellow melted onto her seat 'I thought I was enough for him,' her mind wailed
'Why would he want anypony else? I, RARITY! The fabulous Rarity, I'm Rarity why wouldn't I be enough... What a slap to her ego.
"I just want to wrap my hooves around his snarky little neck and squeeze". Her hooves crushed the tissue box as her magic yanked out a
tangled wad of soft airy cleanliness. Her frustrations ebb and flowed as the eyeliner and makeup was exiled into the past.
"And squeeze and squeeze and Squeeze" She tossed the soiled tissues into the waste bin crossed her hooves and
sighed 'Why is it I can't live with him and can't live without him?' "This is as bad as Sweetie Belles cooking. The worst possible thing".
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Rewind to the cause
The gaming table was a wreck cider bottles where strewn to the four winds. Takeout boxes of Hay Burgers and McDonkeys
laid mostly eaten with a mix of mustard covered dice, a few game pieces that where still standing and sheets of victimized characters.
The games ending and players too had issues with the ciders liberating effects.
Around this table we have in attendance,
Player number one, Foal sitter BBBFF husband and Captain of the Royal Guard visiting his little sis who was out with the girls.
Filling the roll of the vanguard fighter/thief of this rag tag group. Give it up for Shinning Armor.
Player number two was a red unicorn knight sword at the ready wenches clinging to his armored flanks, Welcome The Fighter
Farmer and Ladys Stallion Big Mac.
Player number three has a staff and cloak of a wizard he's all business but her to have fun, Welcome Mr. Davenport.
Player number four and part time dungeon master the trickster himself archer and crazy draconequues, Give a paw for Discord.
Player number five a new Pegasus to the area and mane therapist. The ruling Druish Prince of mane street, Give a hoof for Zephyr Breeze.
And our final player a gentle colt er dragon and master wizard of the game, our buddy the Great Honorable Brave Glorious, Spike.
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As games went this one was pretty much tame until the third round of cider,
"And I cast an unlocking spell and save the Princess Smarity from the evil Squizard" Davenport slurred "What a stupid name for a
Princess who the flank came up with that?"
Big Mac smiled chuckling to the remark "Does she kiss the wizard Quill on the lips?"
"Roll for initiative for the lock and Mac you roll charisma for the kiss the rest of you roll for defenses" Discord cackled chugging on
another cider " Well come on get going I haven't got all night".
The group staggered out a simi-collective boggle "defense?" Spike continued "against what?"
"But from Princess Smarrrrrity of course haven't you ever heard of Stockhorse syndrome? lowest number has to deal with her".
The figure began to grow and inflate slowly her form changed from a prissy demure likeness of Smarity hooves head and body all
transformed as the defensive rolls tumbled across the table.
"Davenport you are saved as your rogue wizard clears the area of influence". Discord smiled "finish you cider and enjoy the show".
"Zephyr my boy you rolled a twenty being a Druish Prince has its advantage you my join the rogue wizard open another cider you're
running a little on empty there. I can't have you not enjoying yourself now can I".
"Oh Big Mac you rolled a four oh the tension is on the raise can Shining or Spike do any better?"
A wail came from the corner of the room as Flurry hungrily awoke alerting Discord to the special 'Feed the pink Albatross exemption'.
"Well I'm out for this round guys duty calls Sorry Mac looks like you're Smarity bait!" Shining darted over snickering picking up
his daughter who saved his bacon "Mommies little girl just saved daddy from a three".
Spike held his breath rolling the die and as it bounced so did the reincarnate of the now over stuffed marsh mellow monster princess.
Her hips swayed violently as her overly plump legs jiggled, even her cutie mark rumbled with her every breath or step.
Adorning her hooves where hobnailed boots topped off with torn fish net stockings ending with black garters all visible through a
blood red slit skirt and that wasn't all, her crotch boobs hung below an extended pot belly that would rival that of a pigs.
And woe to the male who gazed or even peeked at Smaritys face! it was a character of the fashion mare beat with an ugly tree. Twice!
The pink blush circles on her wrinkled and sagging cheeks along with the cherry red lip stick on her wart covered mouth made
clowns choke as the hanging cigar smoldered making the same clowns gag and throw up. and even Sweetie Belle wouldn't like
her bug infested mane. She turned to the lucky guys her false eye lashes waving a welcoming
'Hello boys!' like so many fingers.
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Sweetie Belle trotted into the boutique going up the stares hearing her sisters lamentations she knocked on the
ornate door to her sisters inner sanctum "Rarity you okay?"
"Yes I'm fine Sweetie".
"You sure don't sound like it, I can hear you launching snot all the way down the block". she teased "guy problems?"
"Sweetie! a lady doesn't launch snot! she clears her nose like thus". HONK HONK
"Whatever you still got boy issues".
"How would you know?" Rarity half laughed "It's a more of a grown mares problem".
"Duh! It's got to be a dragon boy problem, I still have emotional scares from your Trenderhoof misadventure".
"Am I that obvious Sweetie?" the little Belle nodded with a knowing smile "Duh all of Ponyville knows, silly".
"Well Sweetie it started when..."
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"DISCORD how could you!" Fluttershy stared at Mr. life of the party "you know how those two feel about each other!"
Discord crossed his arms mumbling under his breath"We where just goofing off nothing really serious"
"What was that? Mister!" Fluttershy asked "You want the dog house, no tea time. that special time out with Angel Bunny?"
"It was funny at the time. Alright?" Discord withered at the gaze "Oh alright I'm sorry Smarity -Rarity's just a fru fru drama queen anyway".
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Spikes die tumbled as time stood still. The princess Smarity smacked her lips the cigar puffing like a locomotive
gaining steam for the ride of a lifetime she was hungry like a cougar. Was it going to be horse meat or dragon nuggets?
The die rolled to a six paused on edge for a second then it flopped over dead to a one, the lowest digit possible.
Spike raised a single digit...
Yoo Hoo dragon boy!
Spikes stomach dropped like a lead bowling ball no strike no gutter ball, just a ball sailing right out of the bowling alley doors.
Doors? Yes doors get those little dragon feet moving! smoke poured from his feet as Spike put the hammer down.
The guys watched with reckless abandon the coming wreck of dragon scales and Smaritys flab.
Shining feeding Flurry Heart was having trouble holding the foal as his dragon brother fled around the gaming table.
Between her excess flab rolling between stomps and his stubby legs waddling the race was almost a dead heat.
Cider bottles, food boxes, dice, characters and other gaming material scattered as Spike launched himself on top of the table.
breathing hard he survived the beginning of Sparitys love feast, She circled the table like a land shark hungry for all the dragon
didn't want to offer.
"Come on guys! This isn't funny".
All the peanut gallery has was a roar of laughter and calls for "Smooch! smooch! smooch! smooch!" filled the air.
"What's the matter Spike the Great Honorable Brave Glorious is princess Smarity too much for you?"
"That's not Rarity! Spike yelled "Discord stop this!" tears filled his eyes ready to spill out.
"I'm just showing you the true Smarity. A mare who will chase strange princes, make shrines to strangers and leave you hanging
like at the Grand Galloping Gala" Discord hissed "Spike my boy I'm doing you a favor, having you see her for what she is. A gold digger".
Spike wiped his face "She's NOT this! She let dreams get out of control because she's just afraid of looking like a failure in front
of her family!" he clenched his claws "How would you feel if the only guys who chased you are jerks looking for a quick roll in the hay!"
The room went silent all eyes on Spike...
OH, LOVER BOY!
Smarity leaped over the table slamming the dragon to the floor her lips attacking every bit of exposed scales fins and claws
Her body rolled over him like the Smooze all that was seen of the Great and Honorable was a Glorious pile of flab and crotch boobs.
Below her hooves was the remains of the once brave dragon his claws tail and flattened spines sticking out of everything broken loose.
A riotous roar erupted around the room, the more Spike struggled the more Smarity jiggled and smooched. The circle jerk continued
until the laughter grew and Flurry Heart cried pointing to her favorite uncle being squished by a clown faced marsh mellow monster.
Shining lost it throwing up in the diaper bag as his daughter peed herself all over him.
The rest of the boys seeing this broke into fits. Cider bottles falling and boogers dripping a fine model of male bonding coming unglued.
Spike was fuming Spike was pissed Spikes frustration was coming to an end.
The Throne room doors opened with a small creek the girls returning for a quiet restful evening of tea...
Smarity locked her eyes on the intruders and screamed "HE'S MINE! GET YOUR OWN DRAGON!" her cigar spat out with drool.
"What the Tartarus is this!" Twilight bellowed at the sight as a scream of "HOW COULD YOU!" came from the prissy drama queen her
exit followed by "YOU...YOU THINK OF ME LIKE THAT AFTER ALL THESE YEARS! and the slamming doors.
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Rarity and Sweetie belle heard a knock at the door with a nervous voice following "Rarity it's me Twilight, I have to talk to you".
A pause came till their eyes met "It's about Spike and..."
Spike laid on his bed talking to his little Rarity plushy well it was more like talking out loud thinking about stuff, like why does it suck
chasing after a mare who only sees you as a basket carrier and a broken heart janitor for all her times of weakness.
"All I wanted was to make her happy and now" Spike sighed "my chances to woo the Lady Rarity are gone. Thanks Discord!"
"Discord was right, Who would want to date a guy like me. Prince Blue Blood, Trenderhoof, Thunderlane, I'm just not in their class".
Spike curled into a ball " I'm not even in the same species or even as strong as they are".
"You are most definitely not in their class surely a few grades better and I have yet to see anypony else tail wrestle as well as you do".
"Rarity?" Spike froze stiff " I'm so sor". her hoof silenced his apology.
"Spike I over reacted and blamed a sweet dragon who I've kept on a string way too long, Twilight and I had a long talk and".
"And it's time I faced the truth". Spike surrendered to his logical side and waited for the kick to the nutz.
"Yes Spikey the truth is I was a selfish snob and used your affections to get what I wanted and it was wrong I can't change the past".
Spike closed his eyes thinking "Horse apples! here it comes!"
She held him close whispering "I'm sorry Spike you're not my basket carrier you are my best friend and I want you to be,"
Spike held his breath.
"My champion my dragon my special somepony for all time".
"Discord your time out isn't finished!" Flutterwarden scolded her charge as Angel Bunny whipped the prisoner with a wet noodle.
"Yuck! Shining what did you do to Flurry Hearts diaper bag!" Cadance gagged as she took over where Shinning passed out.
"So you got drunk again? I'm cutting off you Cider and it's extra chores fer ya" AJ's eyes bored holes through her big brother.
"Hi Mom Dad I had a swell time at Spikes guys night out, Oh little sis? Ah ..." Zephyr smiled thinking What Me worry?"
"You done goofed you think the Princess will continue doing business with us after you did nothing? Think about the amount
of quills she goes through! You're getting the couch for the rest of this month! A guys night out? I can't believe you!" Davenport was hosed.
"Spikey it's about time we introduce you to my family.don't you think?" Rarity saw the dragons eyes sparkle in the moonlight.
Yoo Hoo dragon boy!
