I'm a Zeppelin

by realmjumper

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Changelings, Fluttershy, Comedy
Length: 1209

Drone 319 finds himself floating in the air by a balloon.

Drone 319, Queen Chrysalis's top spy in Ponyville, finds himself hovering over Ciderfest tied to a balloon. Why? He doesn't know. When asked what he's doing, he says the first thing that comes to mind to keep his cover.

"I'm a Zeppelin."

Picture art https://derpibooru.org/301934

[Featured 11/11-17/2016 :yay:]

(Now with audio reading https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VqaOKuSnH1I&feature=youtu.be)

Published 2016-11-11 17:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-11-11 17:20:01 UTC

I'm a Zeppelin

Drone 319 blinked in bewilderment at his predicament. Drone 319 was Queen Chrysalis's top spy in Ponyville, and had never been caught. That might sound impressive, but it actually was not considering that Drone 319 had witnessed how incredibly ignorant and stupid the ponies of Ponyville were. Point in fact, the time that he stood next to Bon Bon disguised as Lyra. Bon Bon was talking his ears off when the real Lyra walked by. Bon Bon looked at the real Lyra then back at Drone 319 and walked off with the real Lyra muttering something about no longer having anymore of Berry Punch's special brew.

Then there was the time where Applejack, a farm pony who was the Element of Honesty, caught him sleeping up in one of her apple trees. Drone 319 knew that he had been caught, but transformed into Applejack's friend, Rainbow Dash, before he hit the ground, complaining at the rude awakening. It wasn't until after he left when he realized that the rainbow mane he wore was backwards, which was quite obvious to any pony, and yet he didn't get caught.

This, however, was a new point of oddity that seemed to boggle even his opinion of idiocy. Drone 319 was hovering three hundred feet over Ciderfest by a big red balloon that was wrapped around his barrel. There were so many question that ran through Drone 319's mind that should have obvious answers, and yet lacked any.

How did he get here? Why did he have a balloon tied around him? Why would he let a pony tie a balloon around him? Why was he in changeling form? Why couldn't he transform? Why did his tongue feel like he licked a sandstone? Did his mommy really love him? Questions upon questions swirled around in his brain.

It was about this time a yellow pegasus, which he recognizing to be Fluttershy, flew up to him. This was it. He was doomed. She could obviously see that he was a Changeling, and he couldn't hid the fact now.

“Excuse me,” She said once she came within three feet of him. “But, uh, what are you doing way up here?”

Drone 319 slowly blinked in reply. No idea of what to say came to his mind, and the hive mind which all drones could draw upon in times of need, like this, was oddly silent, leaving him only one answer.

“I'm a Zeppelin.”

Fluttershy looked very confused. “A...Zeppelin?”

“Yes.” Drone 319 said. “A Zeppelin.”

“Pardon me for saying so,” Fluttershy looked unsure, but pressed on. “But you don't look like a Zeppelin.”

Drone 319 cocked his head to the side, curious to see how long it was going to take this pony to figure out the truth. She didn't sound sure of herself, and he'd had plenty of practice manipulating conversations.

“Have you ever seen a Zeppelin?”

“I've seen them in books.” The yellow Pegasus replied.

“That's what we look like when we grow up.” Drone 319 nodded. “I'm a baby Zeppelin.”

Fluttershy's eyes widened. “A baby Zeppelin? I didn't know that Zeppelin had babies.”

“Where do you think Zeppelin's came from?” Drone 319 asked curiously, twitching his ears a little.

“Well...” Fluttershy thought for several long moments. “Aren't they made? Out of wood and big balloons?”

Drone 319 nodded. “I've got a balloon.” He pointed to the big red balloon tied to his waist. “And I'm clearly made out of wood.”

Fluttershy blinked several times. “You are?”

Drone 319, held up his foreleg. “I'm hollow. Wood is hollow. That's why I float.”

Fluttershy's eyes went wide. “You are a baby Zeppelin!”

'By the Monarch's teeth, this one is a moron!' He thought as the mare fussed over him, going on and on about how he must miss his Mama Zeppelin and his Daddy Zeppelin.

Drone 319 was about to request that he could get a bit of a push, so he could 'float to his Mama and Daddy' when another pegasus joined them. With an internal groan, Drone 319 identified the new comer to be Rainbow Dash. This was going to get interesting. Well, even MORE interesting then it already was.

“Hey Flutters.” Rainbow Dash greeted. She looked at Drone 319, with an eyebrow cocked. “You know you're talking to a Changeling, right?”

Before Drone 319 could react, knowing he'd been caught, Fluttershy spoke up. “He's not a Changeling. He's a Zeppelin.”

The urge to face-hoof was strong.

“Uhh, I'm pretty sure that's a Changeling.” Rainbow replied, leaning back a little and pointing with a hoof.

“He's a baby Zeppelin.” Fluttershy replied. “And he misses his Mama Zeppelin.”

Rainbow Dash scratched her head with a hoof, looking thoroughly confused at this. She looked to Drone 319, who just slowly blinked, then back to her friend.

“I didn't know that Zeppelin's had babies.”

“They do.” Fluttershy replied, sounding very much like an expert at this point. “And sometimes those poor, poor baby Zeppelin get blown away by some nasty wind, leaving them helpless and defenseless in the wild.”

The cyan pegasus looked back at Drone 319, who indeed looked rather helpless just floating there.

“Flutters,” Rainbow Dash put a hoof to her chin, eyes squinting at Drone 319. “I...Think you're right.”

If it wasn't for the fact that Drone 319's life and mission were at stake, he'd have smacked his face so hard with his hoof, he'd had cracked his chitin exoskeleton. How could any ponies be this stupid?

“What should we do?” Fluttershy asked, looking rather worried. “We can't just leave him here. The birds could get to him.”

It was then that Drone 319 had an idea. “If you could, I know where my parents are.”

Both ponies looked at him listening intently. “Where?” They asked in unison.

“Far above the Canterlot Mountain.” He replied. “I can make the trip, but as you can see, I'm at a stand still. If one of you could just give me a boost, I can fly the rest, and make it home in time for supper.” His ears drooped a little. “I still think I'll get a spanking for being gone all day long and not doing my chores.”

Sure it was on a little thick, but Drone 319 figured if he was going to get their help to get out of the sky, he'd better sell it. Before more could be said, Rainbow Dash had gotten behind him and started flapping as hard as she could. Within a matter of seconds, Drone 319 was breaking 80 miles an hour when the pegasus threw him forward, pushing him to speeds that almost broke the sound barrier.

“Bye! Say hi to mom and pops for me!” Rainbow waved. She sniffled, and wiped a tear out of her eye. “I'll miss that baby Zeppelin.”

Drone 319 gently floated to the ground, having been able to bite through the string that held his wings shut. He breathed out a huge sigh and shook his head. His friend, Drone 772 cantered up to him.

“I saw you zoom by and decided to follow you.” Drone 772 said. “Care to explain why you were floating by a balloon?”

Drone 319 slowly blinked in reply. “I'm a Zeppelin.”