A Hard Bargain

by Zap Apple Smash

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dinky Hooves, Trixie, Cheerilee, Big Macintosh, Derpy Hooves, Slice of Life, Alternate Universe
Length: 20278

Lunaverse. Ditzy is approached by some ponies from Manehatten with an offer they doubt she'll refuse

Set in The Lunaverse. Ditzy Doo is a loving mother, a good friend and a dedicated mail mare. She also happens to be the Element of Kindness, something that can lead to a pony getting some unwanted attention. This starts to become a problem when she is approached by some ponies from Manehattan with an offer they doubt she'll refuse. What will happen? How will the Elements react? And what part does Big Macintosh play in all of this?

Published 2012-07-01 05:24:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-05-11 06:17:41 UTC

Morning Rituals and Meetings

It was another beautiful day in Ponyville. The birds were singing, there were only a few clouds in the sky and Ditzy Doo the mail mare was busy doing her early morning rounds. Next on her deliveries was a package for her good friend Trixie.

Ditzy was first going to just leave the package in Trixie’s mail box but then she saw that it was one of those parcels that the receiver had to sign for. The mail mare knocked on the door but got no reply. This was strange because Ditzy knew Trixie wouldn't have started work yet and there were definitly signs of life.

Ditzy continued to knock patiently on the door but unfortunately for her the Night Court Representative was in the middle of a key part of her morning ritual.

“In the southland, there’s a city
Way down on the river
Where the fillies are very pretty
And all the colts deliver.”

As the water from the shower came down, Trixie continued to sing as she washed herself.

They’ve got music, it’s always playin’.
Starts in the daytime, goes on through the night.
When you hear that music playin’,
Hear what I’m sayin’, it makes you feel alright.”

The blue unicorn’s horn started to glow as the wash cloth came to life and continued to scrub Trixie as she started to sway her hips to the imaginary music.

Grab somebody, come on down.
Bring your paintbrush, paintin’ the town.
There’s some sweetness goin’ ’round,
Catch it down in Nieigh Orleans.

“Excuse me, Trixie?”

Trixie was snapped out of her song. She turned to see Ditzy standing there holding a clipboard. “Look I know you’re busy but there is a lot of mail I need to get through today so would you mind signing here before you start the next verse?”

There was a loud crash as Ditzy was thrown out of the window. With a quick flap of her wings she was able to land softly on the ground. She turned back in time to see her clipboard flying out the window too. Surprisingly it landed right in front of the mail mare’s feet. She looked down and smiled cheerfully when she saw Trixie’s signature at the bottom.

“THANK YOU! SEE YA LATER!!”

My little pony, My little pony
Ahh ahh ahh ahhh...
My little pony
Friendship never meant that much to me
My little pony
But you're all here and now I can see
Stormy weather; Lots to share
A musical bond; With love and care
Teaching laughter; It's an easy feat,
And magic makes it all complete!
You have my little ponies
How'd I ever make so many true friends?

“Why are you complaining to me about this?” Pokey Pierce asked.

“Because I pay your wages so you have to listen to me.” Trixie shot back. Currently the two were on their way to have a working lunch with the mayor and the rest of the council. “So then after having my morning ritual interrupted. I stop at Sugar Cube Corner to get a pick me up only to find out that they were completely out of chilli powder. What sort of establishment sells hot chocolate without stocking up on chilli-powder?”

“One that caters to normal ponies?” Pokey offered.

Trixie glared at her assistant. “You know Pokey, I don’t pay you to mock me.”

“Frankly, some days it feels like you’d have to pay me not to.” Pokey paused for a moment when he saw somepony he recognised. “Hey Big Mac.”

Trixie turned to where Pokey was looking and saw what had to be the biggest stallion she had seen in her life. To top it off he was bright red and idly tossing hay bales on to a wagon as if it was nothing. He stopped and turned to the two unicorns, his eyes half lidded and almost looking bored. “Morning Pokey, Morning Ms Trixie.”

The gears in Trixie’s head started to grind. “er...Hi...Have we met?”

“Probably not officially.” The red stallion held out a hoof. “Big Macintosh.”

Trixie took the hoof but only after seeing the green apple on his flank did she get a clue who she was talking to. “You’re related to Applejack?”

“Brother.”

There was an awkward silence until Pokey decided to intervene. “Well we be better be off, see ya Big Mac.” With a gentle nudge, Pokey lead Trixie away while the farm pony went back to lifting hay bales.

“Managed to make that awkward didn’t you?” Pokey muttered.

“Sorry but did you how big he was?” Trixie shot back. “What have they been feeding him?”

“Mostly Apples.” Big Mac called out. Trixie promptly quickened her pace when she realised she was still within ear shot.

“Alright, I get that he’s Applejacks brother. But why haven’t I seen him around before.”

Pokey shrugged. “He’s out of town a lot. And when he is in town he mainly keeps to himself and his work. Besides, considering that he wasn’t wearing a big mirror I’m surprised you even noticed him now-OW!”

When he was sure they weren’t paying any more attention to him , Big Mac stopped what he was doing again and looked back at the two unicorns that were walking away, Pokey suddenly having developed a bit of a limp. He didn’t react when he was joined by Granny Smith.

“So that’s the Element of Magic?” the Granny asked.

“Eeyup.” Big Mac replied dryly.

“And isn’t that Cutie mark she has the same one as...?”

“Eeyup.”

“You think there may be a connection?”

“Maybe.”

“Still makes ya curious, Don’t it?”

“Eeyup.”

Granny Smith raised an eyebrow. “Yer mighty wordy today, aint ya?”

Big Mac didn’t reply and instead looked at the big clock. “Almost lunch time.”

The train pulled into Ponyville Station. When the conductor gave the all clear, passengers started to disembark. No one paid particular attention to three stallions, one slightly below average size flanked by two larger ones, walking out.

The small one of stopped to take in the scenery. “Well isn’t this just quaint? A lot different from home, eh boys.” He looked up to see that his companions were too busy scanning their environment. “Oh relax, this isn’t Canterlot, no one will recognise us here. Besides it’s not like we will be here long. Which reminds me.”

The stallion approached the ticket counter. “Excuse me, I was wondering if I would be able to buy two tickets to Manehattan. One adult and one child. For the day after tomorrow.”

The teller looked on slightly confused. “Er sir, where’s your child?”

The stallion waved his arm dismissively. “Oh no, it’s not for me. I already have my return tickets, I was wanted to get them for some friends that are coming back with me.”

“Oh right.” The teller replied sheepishly. “What are their names?”

The Stallion smiled sweetly. “Ditzy and Dinky Doo,” he placed the required bits on the counter. “And it is definitely one way.”

Dinky sneezed.

“Ya okay, Dinky?” A Blue filly with a bow and arrow cutie mark asked.

“I’m fine Archer, just got some dust up my nose.”

“Okay then, heads up.”

The ball came flying back into Dinky’s direction, except she misjudged her head butt and instead of it going back to Archer, it bounced the other way and landed the between a pair of big red legs. Dinky’s eyes followed the legs up and saw the massive body of Big Mac. The stallion smiled warmly before kicking the ball back to her.

“Thanks Big Mac.”

Big Mac chuckled briefly as he watched the young filly run back to her game before heading off to his destination. He stepped into the class room to see Cheerilee sitting at her desk going through some papers. He knocked on the door frame to get her attention.

Cheerilee looked up from her papers and smiled widely. “Oh Big Mac! Come in, come in. How are you?”

Big Mac shrugged nonchantantly before looking down at the papers. “Bad time?”

“Not at all. Just getting a head with some marking.” Cheerilee replied. “Though knowing your sister, we might be expecting a visit any sec...”

Right on cue, Applebloom burst into class. “WHAT EVER IT IS YA THINK I DID IT WASN’T MY FAULT!!”

“Applebloom.”

“IF IT’S ABOUT THAT THING WITH THE GOOSE I SWEAR I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT!!”

“Applebloom.”

“DID DIAMOND TIARA SAY SOMETHING?! SHE’S JUST LYING TO GET ME TROUBLE!!”

“Applebloom.”

“DON’T LISTEN TO WHAT TWIST’S PARENTS ARE TELLING YOU, IT WAS JUST A DARE, IT DIDN’T MEAN ANYTHING!!

“APPLEBLOOM! I’m not here because of you.”

Applebloom stopped pouring on the excuses. “You’re not?”

“Nope.”

“Oh...well alright...guess I’ll see ya at home...bye.” Applebloom trotted out of the classroom. Both adult ponies, knowing the young filly well enough, continued to stare at the doorway. Almost instantly, they saw one of the tips of Applebloom’s bow peaking out of the frame.

“Applebloom,” Cheerilee said sternly. “If you want to spend your recess indoors, I’m sure I can find some work for you.”

They were answered by the sound of a filly running for dear life. The two ponies let out a chuckle at Applebloom’s expense.

“So what brings you round here?”

Big Mac shrugged once more before reaching into his saddle bag and pulling out a paper bag which he placed on Cheerilee’s desk.

“You brought me lunch? Oh Big Mac you didn’t have to do that.” She then saw the stallion staring at her sceptically. “Hey it’s not like I forgot to pack my own lunch. I’ll have you know that I’m not as absent minded as I was.” To prove her point she pulled out an apple and placed it on the desk. “See?”

Big Mac looked down at the apple and then back up at Cheerilee, raising an eyebrow. The teacher let out a frustrated groan. “Fine! That’s the apple Applebloom brought for me. Happy?

Big Mac didn’t reply but instead pushed the paper bag closer. Cheerilee’s curiosity got the better of her so she opened it and let out a delighted squeal when she saw what was inside. “A dandelion club sandwich and a Fillydelphia style jelly roll! My favourite!”

Big Mac smiled knowingly.

As Cheerilee took out the first half of her club sandwich and started to dig in Big Mac pulled out a paper bag of his own. There was a comfortable silence as the two friends enjoyed their food. Big Mac paused as he saw the paper bag on the desk and was reminded of why he was there.

“Actually, speaking of Fillydelphia, there was something I wanted to talk to you about.”

Carrot

"It's very kind that you thought of me." Cheerilee said. "but it just wouldn't be fair of me to leave this school and my students in the lurch like this."

Big Mac nodded his head. He obviously could respect job loyalty as well as Cheerilee not wanting to undermine his sister's education.

"And though this position is nice," Cheerilee looked again at the sheet of paper listing her potential pay as well as other benefits she would receive. "Very, very nice. I'm just not ready to leave Ponyville. You do understand, don't you?"

"Eeyup."

Cheerilee smiled as she placed her hoof on top of Big Mac's. "But thank you for letting me know about it." the teacher said sincerely. “You're such a good friend." She looked at the clock. "Well I should probably start getting ready for class."

"Eeyup." Big Mac stood up and took his leave, almost walking into Trixie. He gave her a brief nod before going on his way.

Trixie paused as she watched the stallion walk off. "How is it that I go from never seeing that stallion to running into him twice in one day?"

"Did he start wearing a mirror?"

Trixie glared at the School teacher before deciding to retaliate. "So does Carrot Top know that you're getting cosy with one of the Apples?"

"Carrot Top wouldn't care," Cheerilee replied. "And I'm not getting cosy with Big Macintosh. He is just a good friend..."

"Really?" Trixie sat on the desk. "How good is he?"

Cheerilee pushed the blue mare off. "...he is just a friend that decided to stop by, bring me lunch and tell me about a *ahem* " she gave a subtle cough and tried to mumble the last part. "job offer."

Trixie unfortunately heard her loud and clear. "The Apples want to hire you?"

"Not the Apples. There’s a school in Fillydelphia that's wants to expand and are looking for more teachers." Cheerilee explained. "Stop that."

"Stop what?"

"I know that look, you think this is another Octavia thing."

Trixie shrugged "Well maybe I do, a friend stops by out of the blue to offer you a job that means you'll have to leave Ponyville. See a pattern?"

"Yes and there are also some key differences, the job is in Fillydelphia, Big Macintosh told me about it because an old school mate of his works there and had asked him if he knew any good teachers, the school is publicly owned so it’s not some Duke pulling the strings and, most importantly, I told him no and he accepted it."

"Good but just to be safe you better give me the name of the school."

Cheerilee sighed as she handed over the job description "So are you going to start assuming that every time one of us gets a good offer it's some elaborate scheme by Duke Bluegrass?"

"Firstly, it's Duke Greengrass," Trixie retorted. "Bluegrass retired from active politics last year to spend more time on his banjo. Secondly Greengrass is dangerous but he's not the only one that would like to get a hold of an element." Trixie levitated the apple that was sitting on desk and took a bite out of it. "Right now it's safer to assume that everyone carries an ulterior motive."

"Like the blue mare that just stepped into my class?"

"Oh I absolutely had my own motives, I wanted your help with this policy that the mayor told me about, but that's not important right now." Trixie peered into the paper bag. "Hey are you gonna eat that jelly roll?"

Cheerilee grabbed the paper bag and held it possessively. "Thank you for your concern, but everything is fine. Class is about to start soon so I need to get ready. I'll drop by your place after dinner tonight and help you with that policy."

There was a finality in the teachers voice that Trixie didn't dare argue with. "Alright, I'll see you then." The blue mare walked out, the partially eaten apple floating behind her.

Cheerilee shook her head slightly, trying to refocus. There was still ten minutes before recess was over and she was ready for the afternoon lessons but she still wanted some time to enjoy her jelly roll. She had taken it out of the bag and was about to take the first bite when Dinky ran in.

"Ms Cheerilee, you better come quick. Applebloom is accusing Trixie of stealing your apple."

Cheerilee groaned slightly, briefly wondering if waiting until she had finished her treat would make her a bad teacher. "They're not using bad language are they?"

"No but Applebloom's convinced the rest of the class to join in." Dinky explained. "They've tied Trixie up and Scootaloo said something about 'Water-boarding' her."

Cheerilee groaned again.

The mail bag bounced happily against Ditzy’s side, considerably lighter than what it had been at the start of the day, as the grey mail mare headed back to the Post Office to drop off the outgoing mail and to pick up the next load.

“Excuse me Ms Doo.” Ditzy turned to see a shorter than average earth stallion with a chocolate coloured coat, a styled back bluish-grey mane and a golden hourglass with black wings as a cutie mark. “Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Parley.”

“You don’t need someone’s permission to introduce yourself, silly.” Ditzy said with a giggle. “Who are your friends?”

Parley tilted his head slightly, “Friends?”

“Those two guys you were talking to before you came over.” Ditzy explained. “The ones that are still looking at us.”

Parley turned back and saw two large, almost identical earth Stallions. Both had dark gray coats and shortly cut charcoal manes. The only main difference was that one had a silver coin for a cutie mark while the other had a lead weight. Both were also trying, and failing, to look inconspicuous.

Parley resisted the urge to let out a frustrated groan but instead did a beckoning gesture with his hoof. "My apologies, we didn't want to seem as if we were crowding you. These are my associates, Plata and Plomo."

"Wow you have 'Associates'." Ditzy said. "Almost everyone here just has co-workers."

Parley wasn't quite sure if he was being mocked or if Ditzy was genuinely impressed. "I was wondering if we could have a word. I wanted to talk to you about your future."

"Well, I'm not supposed to spend too long chatting with ponies when I'm on my route." Ditzy paused as she checked the time. "But I've only got to drop off the outgoing mail and then I have a bit of time before I have to start my afternoon route. I could talk to you then."

"Oh please do." Parley said cheerfully. "Trust me; you'll be glad you did."

The three stallions waited outside the post office while Ditzy went in.

"Hey there Ditzy!" Post Haste greeted cheerfully. "Want to make a head start on the next pile?"

"Not today." Ditzy replied. "There are some ponies outside that want to talk to me about my future."

Post Haste tilted his head slightly. "What? Like fortune tellers?"

Ditzy thought about the three ponies that were waiting outside for her. "I don't think so. I'll be right back."

She stepped out and found Parley waiting for her, with Plata and Plomo waiting a bit further away, though this time not bothering to act inconspicuous. "I figured it would be better for us to have bit of privacy." he explained. "Though you know I could really go for a Blueberry Muffin right about now. Interested?"

Ditzy was always interested when muffins were on offer but she knew she couldn't. "Sorry but I don't have that much time before I have to get back to work."

"So you mean on top of being a skilled and diligent worker you also know how to time manage." Parley sounded genuinely please. "Ms Doo, your resume is ticking all the right boxes."

Ditzy stared. "Resume? Boxes? What are you talking about?"

"Oh so sorry, getting a head of myself. Well you see Ditzy...is it alright if I call you Ditzy?" Ditzy nodded. "Well you see Ditzy, the ponies I work for sent me here because they want to offer you a permanent consultancy position at our Manehatten head office." Parley pulled out a business card and handed it to Ditzy.

Stronghold Construction & Architecture

"We're a growing organisation that's aiming to be a world leader in construction and innovation." Parley explained.

"But why are you coming to me?" Ditzy asked. "I don't know anything about construction or architecture."

"But you do know air currents,” Parley replied. "You don't realise how vital that talent is."

Ditzy stared at the business pony. "How is knowing air currents vital to building?"

"Well in a town like Ponyville, it's not that important because you're only building two/three storeys high at most. But in Manehatten, we are pushing the boundaries of what we are capable of and striving to build bigger, better buildings, meaning that we need to account for a whole bunch of previously thought of as trivial factors. Like air currents," Parley meaningfully nodded his head to Ditzy. "Do you know how many building projects have failed just because the designs hadn't factored in the effect the wind would have on it? A lot."

"Wow." Ditzy had honestly never realised how important her talent could be aside from weather.

"Wow is right." Parley agreed. "We are able provide training and resources but we still need somepony with the raw talent. That's where you come in."

"Me? Work in Manehatten? I don't know, it's very far away, there's no way I could do there and back every day."

"That's the best part. We're not just offering you a job in Manehatten. We're offering to help you move to the greatest city in Equestria. Plata will be helping you with the financial side and Plomo is really good at helping ponies relocate. Day after tomorrow you will be going to bed in your beautiful new home. Overlooking the splendours of Manehatten."

"But Ponyville is my home." Ditzy argued.

"And it is lovely but I can promise you that Manehatten is in a league of its own. Besides, how nice can this town be if this..." Parley gestured to the Post Office "...is the best it can offer you."

"Hey! I like my job." Ditzy argued

"Really? What do you like about it? The long hours? The sub par pay? Tell me, how much do you make as a mail mare?"

"We're not supposed to talk about our earnings," Ditzy replied. "It’s against policy."

Parley tsked disapprovingly. "You know what sort of companies make policies like that? Ones that know they're short-changing their employees but don't want them telling anypony about it. You know how much you could earn working for Stronghold?" Parley leaned forward and whispered the figure into Ditzy's ear, taking great satisfaction from the look of shock on her face when he pulled back. "And that's just the starting salary, in six months you could be earning twice as much. Not to mention a shorter workday and flexible hours. What that adds up to is a lot more time and money that you'll be able to spend on the important things in life. Like that beautiful daughter of yours."

Parley paused to gauge the reaction mentioning Dinky had on Ditzy. "You know, my mother was a single parent too. Growing up love was one of the few things that our family had. Mom would work long and hard in a crummy job just so that she could provide for us, working herself to the bone so that we had food on the table. We meant the world to each other but some days I barely saw her. She would have gotten a better job if she could but no one ever gave her a chance."

The stallion then closed his eyes and turned his head. "That job robbed years from her life and finally, on her death bed, she told me that she wished she had spent more time with me growing up and be the mother she thought I deserved." Parley opened his eyes and looked back at Ditzy. "I loved her more than anything else in the world and seeing her die with such remorse and guilt broke my heart." He took one of the Ditzy’s front hooves and held it. "I don't want that to happen to you and Dinky."

A stunned Ditzy took back her hoof and stuttered out a reply. "I...I...I've got to get back to work."

Parley smiled sympathetically. "I understand, it's a lot take in. Why don't you sleep on it and we'll speak again tomorrow?"

Ditzy nodded and went back into the Post Office without another word.

Parly turned and rejoined his associates wearing a triumphant smirk. "We got her."

"You sure?" Plata asked, looking somewhat unconvinced.

"Trust me, unless she's as dumb as she looks there is no way she'd refuse the carrot we're dangling in front of her is if."

“And if she does say no?”

Parley shrugged. "Well that's what you two are here for."

Consideration

The three Manehattenites had received the keys from reception and were heading to their motel room.

"Not an ideal choice." Parley stated, "But it wouldn't do to draw too much attention to ourselves."

Plomo was busy complaining.

"¿Por qué estamos perdiendo el tiempo? ¿Por qué no simplemente agarramos al fenómeno y termimanos con esto?
"Why are we wasting time? Why don't we just grab the freak and be done with it?"

Parley turned to Plata for translation. "My brother wonders if it is wise to be waiting for the mare to accept our offer."

Parley sighed. "And this is why I'm the one in charge of negotiations." He ignored the growl coming from Plomo. "Gentlecolts, unneeded hostility would be counterproductive. Forcing the issue means that we might face retaliation from the other elements which could ultimately lead to retaliation from Princess Luna. Let's try and avoid that."

"Maricón." Plomo muttered

"¡Plomo! no digas palabrotas." Plata scolded before turning to a curious Parley. "He says that makes sense." Plata explained.
"Plomo! Watch your language."

Parley nodded and opened the door to their room only to find that instead of it having three beds, it had one double and one single bed. "Oh dear. Well nothing we can do about that now, you too are just going to be very cosy tonight." He then made him self comforatble on the double.

"Ah juro que lo voy a desollar vivo a ese pequeño...."
"Oh I swear I'm going to skin that little..."

Plata stuck a hoof out infront of Plomo. "My brother and I are going to go check out the town, get a lay of the land, just in case."

"Fine." Parely said dismissively. "Just try to look a little less like a pair of Manehatten thugs. We don’t want people getting suspicious."

Pokey was doing some busy work around the represantive house when he heard the front door slam open. He turned to see a dishevelled Trixie storming past. “You alright?”

“I AM NEVER HAVING CHILDREN!!”

Pokey shrugged. “Don’t think the collective gene pool will suffer too greatly from that loss.”

“Cancel all my appointments for the rest of the day.” Trixie ordered. “I’ve just had a traumatic experience and need to consult with my therapist.”

Pokey paused. “You have a therapist?”

“Yes. Dr Bourbon. Phys.D, MD, DDS and STFU!”

“That sounds about right.” Pokey muttered. “Well you don’t have any more appointments today.”

“Good.” Trixie marched into her office and then promptly back marched out.

“However Big Macintosh is here to see you and is currently waiting in your office.”

Trixie let out a frustrated groan as she put her face in her hoof. “Remind me again why I keep you around.”

Pokey brought his hoof to his chin and pretended to be in thought. “Well at the top of my head I’d have to say it’s my sharp wit, excellent work ethic, magnificent horn, incredibly nice backside and the fact that without me you’d probably drown yourself in liquor just to escape the paperwork.”

Trixie glared at her assistant for a moment before turning to head back into the office. “For your information your backside isn’t that nice. It’s a 5 at best, 6 ½ when I’m drunk.”

“So 6 ½ on average?”

Trixie would like to have thought that she had gotten Pokey when she slammed the door in his face but she knew that he had gotten quicker.

Big Mac to his credit sat quietly while looking intently at the picture that was behind the desk. Despite her mood, Trixie couldn’t help but smile at the picture.

“My grandfather,” She explained. “Quartermoon the Magnificent.”

“Great magician.” Big Mac answered.

“You went to see him?” that genuinely surprised Trixie. “Where?”

“Canterlot,” Big Mac replied. “With Grandpa.”

There was an unexpected moment of silent camaraderie between the two before Trixie remembered about his meeting with Cheerilee. Turning her back to the picture she faced the farmer.

“Cheerilee told me that you came to her about a job offer for a teaching position in Fillydelphia.”

“Eeyup.”

“Why would you do that? Rural school like this, who knows how long it might take to get a replacement. Why would you risk undermining the education of the school your sister goes to just give Cheerilee a job opportunity?”

“Not your business.”

“Well I’m making it my business.” Trixie closed the gap and got into Big Mac’s face “Cheerilee’s my friend so if I find out that this job offer is just a scheme from the Trust or some noble that’s buying you off I’ll...” Trixie trailed off as Big Mac stood up to his full height and gave her a look that could make stone flinch. “...It’s not a scheme, is it?”

“No.”

“Well good to know.” Trixie backed away, right into a bookshelf, causing a big book to fall down right on her head.

The hard stare Big Mac had been giving her quickly turned into a look of concern. “You okay?”

“Yes yes fiiiinnneee” Trixie ignored the pain as she staggered behind her desk and tried regain a sliver of dignitiy. “So what can I do for you?”

Big Mac pushed a piece of paper towards Trixie before he sat back down. The representative lifted it up to see that it was Bounty Hunting License renewal form filled out to by Mr Macintosh Apple.

“Bounty hunting license?! What does an apple farmer need with a bounty hunting license?” She cowered slightly under the hard look that Big Mac gave her. “But that’s not any of my business, is it?”

“Nope.”

To avoid the ensuing awkwardness Trixie read through the form to check if there were any flaws. All that was left was for her to cross check it with the local bounty hunting registry and to verify all details and then once she signed it off it was sent to head office in Canterlot for approval. It was a straight forward, albeit tedious process that unfortunately clashed with her planned therapy session.

“Well this seems all in order.” Trixie said with trained enthusiasm. “I’ll be sure to process this and have it sent first thing tomorrow. If it’s approved the new licence will be sent to the address listed.”

Big Mac sat unmoving from his spot staring at Trixie.

“There isn’t anything else I need from you.”

Big Mac didn’t even twitch.

“If there are any issues I promise to let you know.”

Still nothing,

“You’re not going to move until I send this away, are you?”

“Nope.”

Trixie groaned. “Fine.”

She got up from her desk and started looking for the bounty hunting registry. After a couple of minutes of fruitless searching and the realisation that she honestly didn’t know where it was, she stuck her head out of office shouted for her assistant.

“HEY POKEY!! WHERE DO WE KEEP THE BOUNTY HUNTER REGISTRY?!”

“HOW SHOULD I KNOW?” Pokey shouted from the kitchen. “WE HAVEN’T HAD TO DO A BOUNTY HUNTER LICENSE BEFORE.

“WHAT SORT OF ASSISTANT DOESN’T KNOW WHERE THE REGISTRY IS KEPT?”

“WHAT SORT OF REPRESENTATIVE DOESN’T KNOW WHERE THE REGISTRY IS KEPT?”

“Ahem.”

Trixie turned back to see Big Mac pointing towards the bookcase she had crashed into. Trixie went over to the bookcase and found that the book that had clonked her on the head had in fact been the registry. She let out a nervous chuckle as she brought the registry to the desk. After crosschecking Big Mac details (name, address, license number etc), searching for the official seal (which had somehow ended up in the medicine cabinet) and some more Representative/Assistant banter, Pokey was out the door with a sealed up envelope to take to the post office.

Only then did Big Mac stand up and take his leave. Once she was sure he was gone, Trixie levitated out a glass and was about to do the same with her spare bottle of bourbon when her gaze fell back to the registry that was still sitting on her desk. Her need for a drink having waned (slightly), she decided now might be a good time to do some digging.

School day was finally over. Aside from the whole Trixie fiasco and having to lecture her students about unnecessary interrogation and torture, Cheerilee felt that it had, all in all, been a very good day. She was busy tidying up the classroom when Ditzy came.

"Hi Ditzy, Amethyst Star came by to pick Dinky up. That had been the arrangement, hadn't it?"

Ditzy nodded, the half sisters were spending the afternoon together at Sparkler's shop.

"Yeah I know. I was actually hoping to speak with you."

"Sure," Cheerilee stopped tidying and faced the mailmare. "What did you want to talk about?"

Ditzy took in a deep breath. "Dinky is doing alright, isn't she? In schoolwork and in other stuff."

"I think she is doing splendidly." Cheerilee replied. "She's growing up into a fine young filly."

"And is she happy?"

"I've always thought so." The teacher answered. "Why? Has she said something?"

"No, it's just." Ditzy sighed. "Would Dinky be happier if I didn't have to work so much?"

Cheerilee paused before answering carefully, "I think she would be happier for your sake. She knows you work very hard but she doesn't blame you for it and she loves all the time you do set aside for her."

"But if I could find a way to not have to work as much and spend more time with her, that would make me a better mother, wouldn't it?"

"That all depends on what you would have to give up to get that extra time." Cheerilee countered. "And being a good parent isn't just a matter of how much time you spend with your children but also the quality of the time you spend with them."

Cheerilee saw that Ditzy still looked unsure. "Look I can understand that you sometimes feel that you don't get to spend enough time with Dinky. That's natural, we all sometimes wish that we had more time to spend on the things that matter to us. But believe me when I say that you manage to fit more love and devotion into one hour than some stay at home parents fit into a whole day." The school teacher then gave Ditzy a hug. "So don't worry. Dinky is doing fine."

Ditzy returned the hug. "Thank you."

Cheerilee smiled. "That's what friends are for."

"So Wind Whistler is moving house on Monday and I was wondering if you could talk to Applejack about letting me have it off."

"Nope."

It had been a slow day so Applejack had gone to pick up Applebloom and take her home, leaving Big Mac and Caramel to finish selling produce and then to pack everything up.

"Oh come on Mac." Caramel pleaded. "I may actually have a shot with this one. You know how hard it is to find a date when you're a farm hand, not to mention your sister..." Big Mac raised a threatening eyebrow. "is a fine lady and a pleasure to work for."

Big Mac rolled his eyes at Caramel's antics but then paused when he saw Plata and Plomo walking through the market. Caramel noticed the change in demeanour.

"What do you see?" Caramel asked. He started to turn to see what Big Mac was looking at but then stopped when the red stallion put a hoof on his side. "Alright, point taken, just easy on the physical contact, folks are already starting to talk bout us and unlike you I already have a hard enough time with the ladies as it is."

Caramel turned, this time casually, making it look like he was checking out stock. When he turned back to Big Mac his tone was hushed. "Yeah, those two definitely don't look like tourists. Think we should check them out?" Big Mac gave a single nod. "Alright so how shall we play it? Cheerful cherry? Lazy gazing?" Caramel sighed when he saw the look Big Mac was giving him. "One Caramel special, coming up."

The blue-eye stallion a picked up a basket of apples and said in a cheerful voice. "Sure thing thing Mac, I'll get these delivered right away." He then sprinted off. Big Mac took a brief moment to check if there were any potential customers coming but all was quiet.

*CRASH*

"¡IDIOTA!"
"IDIOT!"

"Sorry, sorry, sorry."

"¡ DEBERÍA ROMPERTE CADA HUESO DE TU CUERPO, BOLUDO!"
I SHOULD BREAK EVERY BONE IN YOUR STUPID BODY!

"Look I said I was sorry."

Big Mac trotted over to the scene. Apples were scattered everywhere, Caramel was pinned to a wall with Plomo about to bash his skull in. Big Mac casually took hold of Plomo's hoof before any real damage could be done. "Problem?”

Plata sized up the new comer and quickly decided that a confrontation wouldn't be worth it. "No no, my brother and I were just telling your friend he should be more careful." Plata stepped back and started to walk away. Plomo wrenched his hoof out of Big Mac's grip and reluctantly did same, but not before giving Caramel one last shove against the wall and making sure to step on some of the apples as he walked away.

The two stallions started picking up the apples and only once they were certain that that they were alone did Caramel speak.

"Alright, I wasn't able to get much, they were on me a lot quicker than most ponies, they could be military but I'm thinking more likely enforcers. They weren't carrying a lot but I did see a room key for May Flower Motel. Oh and I also swiped this from the one that kept yelling at me in Caballerian." Caramel lifted up his hind leg to reveal a business card he had hidden under his hoof.

Big Mac lifted it up to inspect it, it was for a Manehatten based construction company.

"Any idea what a couple of Manehatten 'Builders' are doing in Ponyville?"

"Nope."

Deliberation

Ditzy was busy doing some housework, taking the time to take in the world her mail mare job was providing for her and Dinky. It wasn't fancy but it was warm (mostly) and it provided them with everything they needed (so long as they were frugal).

But there was more to life than just surviving and no matter what she felt about moving to Manehatten, what mattered most was providing for Dinky. It wasn't the money that mattered but the quality of life she was providing her daughter.

"Mommy!" Ditzy was brought out her thoughts by the feeling of Dinky giving her a hug.

The grey mare brightened instantly as she returned the hug. "Hello, muffin. Did you have fun with Sparkler?"

"Yeah!" the young filly then started to list off all the things the two sisters had managed to fit into their afternoon. About halfway through was when Sparkler made it into the apartment.

"Just remember to stop for breath." She teased.

Dinky replied by taking in a deep breath and blowing a raspberry at Sparkler. Ditzy would have scolded her if Sparkler hadn't blown a raspberry right back. Dinky then ran off to put away her school bag, giggling the whole way. The two older mares looked at each other and smiled as they rolled their eyes in good natured camaraderie. They then quickly looked away, things were still awkward between the two mares but they were getting better.

"Hope she wasn't any trouble."

"She was wonderful." Sparkler assured her. "I really had a great time."

"That's good, Dinky had been looking forward to today."

"Yeah, me too." Sparkler replied.There was another moment of silence. This time a little less awkward. "So Dinky was telling me about a Fluttershy today and how she had helped her with the bunny census."

"Yeah, Fluttershy takes taking care of the animals around Ponyville seriously. Dinky likes to help out when she can."

"Well between helping out Fluttershy and being an assistant for The Night Court Representative's Magic shows, Dinky definitely leads an exciting life."

Ditzy paused, thinking about Fluttershy, Trixie and all the other things Ponyville had to offer. "She does, doesn't she?"

At that moment Dinky came back in. "Mommy, Sparkler taught me the sparkle charm she uses for her displays. Take a look at this." Dinky's horn lit up as she prepared to do the spell.

Sparkler quickly leaned over and whispered into Ditzy's ear. "Shield your eyes."

"What?"

The room was then filled with a blinding white light.

"Still a little strong, Dinky."

Trixie led Cheerilee to her lounge. The teacher declined the offer for a drink as she made herself comfortable on the couch.

"Alright so what did you want help with?"

"Did you know Big Mac was a bounty hunter?"

Cheerilee stopped and starred at her. "How is this relevant to the policy you wanted my help with? In fact, how is that relevant with anything?"

"Relevant!! Bounty hunters are nothing but a bunch of money crazed scumbags!"

Cheerilee pursed her lips. "You know my father used to have a bounty hunter license." She paused "I don't think he ever caught anyone though. I think he just kept renewing his license cause mom liked it. I remember she would shake her flank at him, saying 'I've got your bounty right here'. Then they'd send me to go play at the neighbour’s house."

The teacher sighed when she saw the look of dismay (and slight disgust) Trixie was giving her. "Look, I know that bounty hunting comes with a stereotype but it is legal. Also, it's common practise for big farms to have at least one employee with a valid bounty hunting license. Honestly, would you want to mess with a farm that had a bounty hunter, especially one that looks like Big Mac?"

"This isn't just about precaution, Big Mac has collected." Trixie levitated over the registry and opened it to the relevant page showing the bounty collections that had been paid out by Ponyville Representatives, including who they were paid to and the criminals that they were paid for. "Look at the top three pay outs here in Ponyville. Hardball, Steal-Beak the griffon, Chuckles, all three were high profile bounties with substantial pay days, all collected by Big Mac."

Cheerilee nodded her head as she looked at the list. "True, though you know what else they have in common? All three were dangerous criminals hoping to hide out in Ponyville." She explained "I know for a fact that Chuckles had put at least three ponies in the hospital and could have killed one of them if Big Mac hadn't stepped in. He was doing Ponyville a service."

"And getting paid handsomely for it."

"Oh, you are not going to play that card." Cheerilee scolded. "Tell me, how big was our reward for stopping Corona again?"

"That's different."

"Yes because it was you getting the reward." Cheerilee rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Look I know this is somehow going to lead to you accusing Big Mac of having an agenda, so let’s hear it."

"What if somepony has put a bounty on the elements?" Trixie theorised, "Big Mac might be trying to collect."

"Well, for a start, it would be illegal. License or not, collecting a bounty that is not government sanctioned would lead to him potentially getting prosecuted for various crimes including abduction, harassment, assault and trespassing, to name a few."

"If he was caught."

"And if he was suspected of taking private bounties he could lose his license."

"Why are you so quick to defend him?" Trixie asked.

"Why are you so quick to condemn him?" Cheerilee shot back. "Look, I know you want to be cautious but this has gone from being cautious to being paranoid."

"Maybe a little paranoia wouldn't hurt."

Cheerilee closed her eyes and mentally counted to 10. "Trixie, let me explain a little bit about how being a teacher works. I have a classroom full of young fillies and colts that I have to teach. Do you know what that means?" She didn't wait for Trixie to answer. "It means that I have to leave all personal feelings and opinions I have about my students or their families at the door. What I do in that classroom could affect my students future so I don't get to hold grudges or suspicions. Hay, there's one student whose mother used to call me 'Smear-ilee" at school but you can bet that I still give that student the same care as I give any of the others."

"But..."

"But it's not easy." Cheerilee continued, "I'm not perfect and some days I find it damn hard to stay professional, especially after having to deal with some stuck up know-it-all parent looking down their nose at me and thinking either I'm the one who should be raising their kids or that they know more about teaching than I do. But every once in a while I deal with some pony decent, who wants the best for their family but also trusts me to do my job. Somepony like Big Macintosh." Cheerilee then seemed to stare right through the representative. "Now I know this whole thing is your way of trying to be a good friend but just remember that tomorrow I have to look Applebloom right in the eye and act as if a friend hadn't tried to 'prove' to me that her brother is dirty and out to get me."

Trixie stared and then opened her mouth, not sure of what she was going to say, but then closed it again when Cheerilee raised her hoof.

"Look, did you actually want my help or was this all some scheme to talk to me about Big Mac?"

Trixie, slightly hurt by the accusation but realising that she kinda deserved it, pulled out a file and laid it on the table. "You don't have to..."

Cheerilee gave Trixie a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "I love helping my friends. So what did you want help with?"

It was late at night at Sweet Apple Acres, Big Mac was the last pony up, pouring over his file of active bounties. So far he hadn’t found anything matching the two he had seen in the market but Caramel had done some digging, none of the local builders knew anything about a Manehatten based Construction Company coming to Ponyville and absence of a bounty didn’t mean absence of guilt.

He was brought out of his thoughts by a mug full of tea being placed on the desk. He looked up and saw the wise old face of Granny Smith smiling at him.

“Saw yer light on.” She looked at the papers. “Planning yer next hunt?”

Big Mac smiled gratefully before taking sip. “Eeyup.”

Granny Smith chuckled as she ruffled Big Mac’s mane. “Just like yer grandpa, always keeping yer eyes open for ways to make Equestria a better place.” She then took the empty chair nearby. “So Applebloom told me ya went to see Cheerilee today. Did ya tell her about the job offer?”

“Eeyup.”

“She take it?”

“Nope.”

“Well no surprise there. Speaking from experience, once a mare like that strikes a claim there’s little in this world or the next that will get them to move.”

Big Mac sighed. “I know.”

“The important thing is that ya tried.” Granny Smith said, “Besides, maybe it’s for the best. I know ya trust yer connections in Fillydelphia but it’s better to keep those six together and as they say, if ya want something done right, do it yer self.”

Big Mac pointed to himself “Just one stallion.”

“Sonny, the day that yer ‘just one stallion’ is the day I’m a just a senile old grandma.” Granny Smith paused. “Don’t answer that.”

The next day was another bright and sunny one as Ditzy headed to the post office, her spirit considerably lighter than it had been the night before.

"Ah Miss Doo, puntcual as always." Ditzy turned to see Parley and his assicioates. "I trust that you have had a good night. Did you think my offer over?"

"I did," Ditzy replied. "and the answer is no."

"Excellent, now we will have to leave soon so I've taken the liberty of..." Parley did a sudden double take. "NO?!"

"Thank you so much for the offer." Ditzy said sincerely. "But Dinky and I have a good life here in Ponyville and I don't think now is the right time to move."

Parley stared at Ditzy, trying to process what he was hearing. He then chuckled. "Well I guess we were kinda short changing you. Tell you what, why don't we add another 50% to what we offered you before."

"Sorry but the money was never what was important to me."

"Not.. important...."The gears in Parley's head start to grind. "Well then, tell me, what is important? What can I offer you that will make you reconsider."

"Is there I way that I would be able to work from Ponyville?"

Parley did not look amused "No."

"Then there is nothing you can offer me." Ditzy turned to leave. "Sorry to have wasted your time but I hope you enjoyed your stay anyway."

Parley, looking even less amused, signalled Plata and Plomo. The two big stallions proceeded to box Ditzy in against a nearby wall. Parley also closed in, leaving a Ditzy with no real means of getting away aside from straight up but considering how close the stallions were, they would be on her before she could fly away.

"Alright, I'll keep this simple. Have you ever heard of the expression 'carrot and stick'?"

Ditzy looked around at the three stallions that were suddenly crowding her "Er...yeah, there's a mule on my route who sometimes uses it."

"Well, Ditzy. This job offer was the carrot, it's big, it's juicy and it's ten times better than anything a pony like you could ever hope to get."

"I told you, I'm not interested."

"Now you see, the funny thing is, I don't care. My employer doesn't take no for an answer. Which means I don’t take no for an answer. Which means you are going to go to Manehatten, whether or not you’re interested." Parley closed the distance until he was almost touching noses with Ditzy. "So take the carrot or else get the stick."

"HEY!! LEAVE HER ALONE!!"

Ditzy and Parley looked away from each other and saw Post Haste standing there. Parley scoffed at the scrawny postal worker.

"Beat it, my friends and I were just having a word with Miss Doo."

"Well your word's over."

Silver Script stepped out of the post office, carrying a baseball bat that had the words "Love & Tolerance" written on it.

"If you don't leave right now, I'm going to love and tolerate the shit out of you!"

Parley weighed his options, not really wanting this encounter to turn physical. "Alright, point taken." He turned back to Ditzy. "I'll be at room 6 of the May Flower Motel. In case you change your mind."

The Manehatten ponies then left. Once they were gone, Silver Script lowered the bat and went to check on Ditzy.

"You okay?" Ditzy nodded. "What did they want?"

Ditzy took in a deep breath to steady herself. "They wanted me to take a job in Manehatten and when I told them no, they started to threaten me."

Silver Script nodded. "Alright Ditzy, you're taking the day off." Ditzy opened her mouth to protest. "No arguments. Post haste will cover for you." Ditzy closed her mouth. "You're friends with the Night Court Representative right?" Ditzy nodded. "Do you trust her?" Ditzy nodded again. "Well then come on, I'm going to make sure you get there safely. No arguments."

Parley was muttering angrily to himself as he spied Ditzy and the bat wielding postal worker walking off from around the corner. Once they were out of he turned back to Plata and Plomo.

"Got everything you need for plan B?"

"Sí. A diferencia de usted, realmente podemos hacer nuestros empleos."

"I heard a 'Sí' in there, so go get ready. We're leaving this afternoon." Parley ordered. "I'm gonna go get these tickets exchanged."

As Plata and Plomo left, Parley pulled out the two tickets and looked at them for a brief moment.

"Ditzy Doo, you brought this on yourself."

Stick

Trixie opened the door to find Ditzy and Silver Script standing there, the post master still carrying the Love & Tolerance bat.

"Look if this is about that time I tried to reuse stamps, I promise it won't happen again."

The two postal workers stared at her for a moment. Silver Script then let out an awkward cough. "Actually we're here cause Ditzy needs a safe place to be right now."

"Oh right, come in, come in."

Silver Script turned to Ditzy. “Now you stay here and explain to the representative what’s going on. I’m going to go see if I can get some help with the creep problem. When I get back we will go get Dinky from school. Stay here until then. Understand?”

Ditzy nodded before giving Silver Script a hug. “Thank you.”

Silver Script disengaged from the hug and opened his wings, ready to take off. “Just looking out for my own.” The postal worker then took off.

“Ditzy?” There was obvious concern in Trixie’s voice. “What’s going on?”

Ditzy sighed as she entered the house.

“I’m not entirely sure but I will tell you what I know.”

Silver Script landed at Sweet Apple Acres and saw Applejack bucking some nearby trees. The farm pony stopped what she was doing and came over to great the post master but immediately went into an attack position when she saw the baseball bat Silver Script was still carrying.

"Dag nab it Script! Don't you threaten me!!" Applejack said in a warning tone. "I told ya, we don't return apples ya haven't used. I don't care if ya misjudged how many ya'd need for yer bake sale."

Silver Script stared. "Actually I'm here to see your brother. Is he here?"

"Yeah sure, I'll call him. HEY BIG MAC!!! SILVER SCRIPT'S HERE TO SEE YA!!!" Applejack glanced again at the bat. "I THINK IT'S BOUT THAT OVERWEIGHT PACKAGE YA TRIED TO SEND!!"

Big Mac came over, took one look at Silver Script and one look at L&T. "Worker being harassed?"

"Why does no-pony else get that?"

Big Mac held up a hoof, indicating for the post master to wait a moment. The red stallion let out a sharp whistle. Soon Caramel came trotting up to them.

"Look Mac, I know you’re proud of that whistle but there are better ways to call me..." Caramel trailed off when he saw Silver Script carrying a baseball bat. "Look, I know rent on the post office box is overdue but I promise, if you wait til next payday, you'll get your money."

Big Mac rolled his eyes as he started to lead Silver Script to a spot where they could talk in private. On the way, Silver Script had a quick word with Caramel.

"Just remember I know when Sweet Apple Acres pay their workers, if I don't have the money by the end of the next day I'm coming for you."

The Post Master had never been one to mince words and was very quick to bring the two farm workers up to speed about the situation with Ditzy. From the description, it was obvious that two of the three assailants had been the ones Big Mac and Caramel had seen at the market but two stallions decided to keep that fact to themselves for the time being.

"And that's all I know." Silver Script explained. "Now seeing as I technically work for the government, I would never ask you to do anything illegal. That said, if you could find these scum-bags and ‘inform’ them that Ponyville isn't worth staying in, I would be really grateful. Think you could help?"

Big Mac and Caramel gave each other a meaningful glance before turning back to the Post Master. "Eeyup."

After seeing Silver Script off and telling Applejack where they were going, Big Mac and Caramel got out the saddle bags that carried their bounty hunting gear.

“So what’s the plan?” Caramel asked. “Knock on the door and ask them politely?”

“Eeyup.” Big Mac fastened the badge that showed he was acting in official bounty hunting capacity.

Caramel nodded, pretty sure where this was going but still feeling the need to check. “And if they refuse?”

“Knock on their heads,” Big Mac paused before adding, “politely.”

Caramel smiled as the two headed to town. “And this is why I like working with you.”

“Alright class, today we are going to be taking a look at griffons.” Cheerilee pinned a side on picture of a griffon on the wall.

The whole class seemed genuinely interested, possibly because not too long ago there had been an actual griffon in town.

“Now, aside from appearance, one of the key differences between a griffon and say a Pegasus pony is the fact that griffons are primarily carnivores. Can any pony tell me what that means?”

Before any of the foals were able to answer a strange tube came flying in through an open window, landing in the middle of the classroom. Suddenly smoke burst out of the tube and soon the classroom was filled. The panic broke out.

“My little ponies *cough* *cough* stay calm *cough* cover your mouths and noses and follow *cough* my voice.”

Despite Cheerilee’s best efforts, the sound of screams and coughing became almost deafening as the terrified students tried to get out of the smoke filled classroom. The ensuing chaos was the perfect cover for a figure to sneak in, his grey coat blending in almost perfectly with the smoke.

Dinky was stumbling blindly, trying to find her way through the smoke when suddenly she was grabbed and stuffed into a bag, her screams being drowned out by all the other frightened school kids. The figure held on tight to the bag and bolted out the door, running right past Applebloom, who had been trying to use her bow to cover her face, and being long gone before any pony came to investigate what the strange smoke was.

Trixie opened the window as Ditzy finished explaining to her about the strange stallions. “I wished you had come to me sooner about this.” The regret was evident on Ditzy’s face. “But the important thing right now is to keep you two safe. Silver Script is right, you and Dinky need to lay low until we figure out who they are and how we can get rid of them.”

Trixie started to pace, trying to come up with a plan of attack, these Manehatten ponies didn’t seem like they were in the mood for talking. While she would do anything to keep Dinky and Ditzy safe she was also well aware that she was currently 0-1 when it came to trading blows with earth ponies and the last time had only been against a musician.

She was starting to regret having given Pokey the day off. Honestly, how important could a grandma’s 80th birthday be? “The first thing we need to do is get Dinky out of class. The sooner the better.”

Ditzy nodded, she didn’t like pulling Dinky out of class, knowing how important an education is, but it wasn’t worth the risk. She looked out the window to see if Silver Script was back yet and instead saw smoke rising up. The weird thing was that it wasn’t coming from any of the nearby chimneys but was instead coming from the same direction as...”

“THE SCHOOL!!”

Ditzy shot out the window before Trixie had a chance to stop her.

When she arrived at the school she saw all the students as well as various adults were outside as the smoke that was coming out of the school started to dissipate. Ditzy franticly looked around, trying to find her daughter. Finally she found Cheerilee trying to calm down a bunch of students.

"Where's Dinky?"

"I'm not sure." Cheerilee's voice was hoarse from smoke inhalation and trying get the students out of the class. "Somepony set off a smoke bomb. I'm still trying to find every pony."

Trixie, who had given chase, arrived just in time to see Ditzy flying into the school.

Once inside, the grey mare frantically scoured the class room, desperately calling out her daughter’s name. She stopped when she heard something snap under her hoof.

She looked down and her breath caught when she saw that it was a stick with Dinky's picture tied to it.

Big Mac and Caramel, having seen the smoke as well, had instantly changed their route and arrived at the school shortly after Ditzy had. Big Mac scanned the area and found nurse Redheart tending to some students, including Applebloom who came racing towards him when she saw her brother.

"Big Mac! It was terrible." She wailled. "Ms Cheerilee was teaching us about griffons but then a strange tube flew in to the class and then it filled with smoke and then..." the rest drowned out into incomprehensible sobbing as Big Mac held her close.

"It's okay." Big Mac stroked Applebloom's mane, trying to console her.

The two siblings stayed liked this for a couple of minutes before Applebloom forced herself to back away slightly from her brother. "I think Dinky is in trouble."

"What?"

"After the smoke started and I was trying to get out, I heard her suddenly scream and then something big and grey ran past me and I haven't seen her since."

Big Mac and Caramel looked at each other and then quickly rescanned the surroundings and couldn't see the young unicorn filly anywhere either. Caramel cursed under his breath while Big Mac tried to formulate a plan. Every instinct was telling him to stay and take care of his sister but he knew that there was a small window of opportunity to find Dinky that was rapidly closing.

"Applebloom...I..." He was cut off by Applebloom starring up at him with her big pleading eyes.

"Please Big Mac, you've got to help her."

Big Mac scooped Applebloom up into another quick hug. "Love ya sis." He then turned to Caramel. "Home. Now."

"You got it boss." Caramel replied as he stood beside Applebloom. "I'll catch up after I get her home."

At that reassurance Big Mac turn to run off, hoping to pick up the trail before it was too late. Instead he ran straight in to Cheerilee.

“I'm coming with you.” The teacher said firmly. “And don't you dare argue.”

“No time.” Big Mac replied as he hurried to find a trail. Cheerilee followed only stopping briefly to get some of the parents to watch over the remaining students.

Parley was lying on the bed reading a magazine.

*Crash*

He looked up and saw the door had been knocked clean off the hinges and standing in what remained of the doorway was an extremely angry looking Ditzy. “Where. Is. Dinky?”

Parley got up from the bed and looked at the mangled door. “You know I ain’t paying for that.”

Ditzy flew in and pinned the stallion against a wall. “WHERE IS DINKY?!!”

Parley, while not amused by the mailmare’s antics, did not feel the least bit threatened. “Listen lady, you don’t get to make calls. You gave up that right when you decided that we had to do this the hard way. So unless you want us to mail that little brat back to you one piece at a time, hooves off.”

Ditzy reluctantly let go of Parley and took a step back, still looking like she was ready to strike. “What did you do to her?”

“Your daughter is fine. My associates are busy securing an alternate means of transport for her.” Parley dusted himself off, more out of show. “Now I know here is the part where you threaten me, ask what I want and demand that I give your daughter back. Let’s skip all that and just move to the part where I explain what’s going to happen. The train for Manehatten leaves in one hour. We will both be on that train. You will sit quietly in your seat next to mine. When we arrive at Grand Central Station Dinky will be waiting for you with cotton candy and a big red balloon.” Parley looked Ditzy in the eye to let her know he wasn’t kidding. “Anything outside that plan results in Dinky not being your problem anymore.”

Ditzy let out a growl. “Your mother would be ashamed.”

“My mother is a senile old bat who I dumped at the nearest rest home first chance I got.” The stallion replied. “But is now really the time to be worrying about my family problems? You’ve got packing to do.” He then pointed to an imaginary watch on his wrist. “Tick tock.”

Ditzy, angry beyond belief but knowing there was nothing she could do, walked out without saying another word. She made it just out of reception when Trixie ran up to her.

“Thank Luna you’re alright. You should have waited for me. I’m scared for Dinky too but now is not the time to start flying in without a plan.” Trixie then noticed that Ditzy was still walking off. “Where are you going?

“Home, I need to pack.”

Plomo watched from the shadows as Ditzy walked away from the motel with Trixie chasing after her. He was about to continue following them and make sure Trixie didn’t interfere but found himself flung against a wall. Before the grey stallion had a chance to retaliate, Big Mac pinned him down and started to twist one of Plomo's fore legs in a way it wasn't supposed to twist.

"Listen closely.” Cheerilee said to the pinned stallion. “We will ask questions. You will give answers. Understand?"

"¿Que?"

"Oh right you speak Caballerian." Cheerilee cleared her throat before trying the interogation again. "Escuche atentamente , voy a hacer preguntas y usted contestara ¿Entiende?"

She then noticed Big Mac look at her with a raised eyebrow.

"What?" Cheerilee asked. "You've been around enough to know the benefits of being Bilingual. Besides, who doesn't like a cunning linguist?"

The two stallions stared at the mare.

"Señora loca." Plomo muttered. "Me gustes...EGRK!!"

Big Mac had responded by twisting Plomo's foreleg further.

Trixie made it back to Ditzy’s place in time to see her filling up a suitcase.

“What are you doing?”

“They have Dinky.” Ditzy didn’t stop packing. “If I’m not on the train that leaves in less than an hour, they’ll...” She couldn’t bring herself to finish.

“And you’re going to go with them?!” Trixie asked in dismay. “Ditzy, they smoke bombed a school!! Who knows what they're capable of.”

“Exactly and right now they have Dinky.”

“Look, I want to save Dinky too but if you get on that train you’ll be playing right into their hooves.” Trixie argued. “Just stop and let’s come up with a plan. If we get our friends together I’m sure we can...”

“There’s no time.” Ditzy shot back as she closed the bag. “All that matters is making sure that Dinky is safe and I won’t gamble her life on some hair brained scheme.” She picked up the suitcase and started to head for the door, but Trixie ran in front of her and blocked the path. “Get out of my way.”

“NO! This is a very bad idea and I’m not going to let you go through with it!” Trixie levitated the suitcase out of Ditzy grip. “If you get on that train it will be too late for both of you.”

Ditzy didn’t try to get the suitcase back but instead just looked away in resignation. Trixie slowly approached the grey mare. “I know this seems hopeless but if we just...” Trixie never got to finish as Ditzy’s hoof collided with the side of Trixie’s face.

Trixie stood in a daze for a brief moment before both her and the suitcase she had been levitating fell to the ground. Ditzy went to the laundry cupboard and pulled out a spare blanket and pillow.

She put the blanket over the unconscious mare and carefully placed the pillow under her head.

“I’m sorry.” She whispered, a single tear flowing down her cheek, before picking up the suitcase and leaving.

Karma

Trixie was woken up by a slap across the face. “Ow!” When she regained her senses she saw Raindrops standing over her.

“Is this really the time to be napping?”

“I wasn’t napping. Ditzy punched me. Why do you ponies keep hitting me?!”

“Cause you kind of deserve it sometimes.”

Trixie glared at the weather pony. “What are you doing here?”

“Well I was at the school in case there had been a fire. I saw you and Ditzy leave in such a hurry, so when I couldn’t find Dinky anywhere on the school grounds I started to get worried.” Raindrops explained. “I decided to come check and on the way here I ran into Silver Script who explained to me what was going on."

“Could we focus on finding Ditzy?” Trixie turned her head to see Silver Script, still carrying the L&T bat. “You were supposed to keep her safe.”

“I tried but then...” Trixie’s punch drunk brain finally got back up to speed. “WE’VE GOT TO GET TO THE TRAIN STATION RIGHT NOW!!!”

Ditzy arrived at the train station to find Parley waiting for her.

“Punctual as always.” Parley said smugly “Good to see you haven’t let the recent event change that.”

Ditzy just glared at Parley as the two boarded the train.

“Well isn’t this nice.” Parley commented. “It looks like we’re getting a car all to ourselves. What a pleasant turn of events.”

Ditzy scanned the empty train car. “Where’s Dinky?”

“Again with that? Honestly you’re like a broken record. I told you, my associates have found an alternative means of transport for her so she’ll be waiting for us in Manehatten.” Parley sat on a nearby seat. “My advice to you is to get comfy and enjoy not having to worry about the little brat for a while.”

Something snapped in Ditzy’s brain. She picked up her suitcase and threw it through a nearby window, sending shattered glass everywhere.

Parley looked at the grey mare in dismay. “What do you think that is going to prove?”

Instead of answering, Ditzy pounced, grabbing hold of Parley, then flew straight out of the opening she had created.

Ditzy flew higher and higher, dragging a screaming Parley along with her. She finally found a lone cloud to stand on and dangled Parley over the edge by his tail.

“LET ME GO! LET ME GO!” Parley paused for a moment as he reassessed the situation. “DON’T LET ME GO! DON’T LET ME GO!”

“Where is Dinky?” Ditzy’s speech was slightly muffled because she was hanging on to the tail with her mouth but she was still surprisingly clear.

Parley’s screaming soon died down in to a panicked muttered as he tried very hard not look down. “Look, I know I’m not your favourite pony right now but if you kill me my boss’ll...”

“Your boss will keep Dinky alive so long as they think they can use her to get to me. If you die it will just be considered collateral damage so long as I’m on that train when it leaves.”

“You won’t kill me, you’re the element of Kindness.”

“Kindness has limits.” Ditzy answered. “and I’ve reached mine.”

The stallion was starting to sweat. “Look we’re both reasonable ponies. Get me down and I’ll tell you where to find Dinky.”

“No you tell me where to find Dinky and then I’ll think about letting you down.”

“You drive a hard bargain.”

“The ground is harder.”

“Alright! Alright! The thing is I don’t actually know where Dinky is.”

“My jaw is getting tired.” To prove it, Ditzy loosened her grip on Parley’s tail.

“It’s the truth I swear.” Parley was on the verge of tears. “Plata was in charge of getting Dinky to Manehatten, I never thought to ask him how he was planning on getting her there.”

“Well sucks to be you.” Parley started to plummet when Ditzy let go.

“PLOMO!! HE WOULD KNOW!!!”

Parley’s descent started to slow and came to a complete stop inches from the ground. He risked a glance upwards and saw that Ditzy had grabbed his tail again. She then dropped him onto his back but he was too scared to move. “Plomo was supposed to be following you. He and Plata scheme everything together. Find him and he can tell you where Plata went with Dinky.”

Ditzy glared down at Parley for a moment longer before being satisfied that the stallion had told her everything. She then clocked him in the jaw her right hoof knocking him out.

“Oh sure now you decide to actually start punching the bad guys.”

Ditzy turned to see Trixie, Raindrops and Silver Script approaching. “What are you doing here?”

“What are we doing here?” Trixie repeated in disbelief. “You punch me in the face and that’s all you have to say? What do you think we’re doing here?”

Raindrops silenced Trixie with a nudge. “We came to help you and Dinky.” She paused when she noticed that Parley was unconscious. “Seems we were a little late for that.”

“No time.” Ditzy said. “I’ve got to find one of the goons that were with him.”

“You mean we’ve got to find him.” Trixie interjected. “Look I know knocking me out was your way of stopping me from getting hurt but the best shot we have at saving Dinky is if we work together.” She then crouched and covered her head.

“What are you doing?” Silver Script asked

“Protecting my vitals in case she hits me again.”

“You're right.” Ditzy admitted.

“Well first thing we need to do is tie up this guy.” Raindrops idly poked the unconscious stallion. “Has anypony got some rope?”

“Here ya go.” Pinkie Pie appeared, holding a roll of rope. “I have rope hidden all across Ponyville, in case of rope emergencies.”

“Pinkie Pie?” Trixe gaped at the pink pony. “What are you doing here?”

“A running gag and a pointless cameo. See ya.”

As the other three watched Pinkie bounce off, Trixie used her magic to quickly tie up Parley.

“You know, speaking of Pinkie.” Sliver Script spoke casually. “Doesn’t she usually have these things at her parties that you dangle from a tree and beat with a stick until candy comes out?”

“Yeah, they’re called Piñatas.” Raindrops said. “Why do you ask?”

Silver Script eyed a nearby tree as he casually ran his hoof over L&T. “No reason.”

“That’s extremely tempting but not helpful.” Trixie turned back to Ditzy. “You said something about a goon?”

“Yeah, he was supposed to be following me. Parley said he would know where Dinky was.”

“The only one of those crooks that we’ve seen since so far was this one.” Silver Script gave Parley a kick. “Think something happened to him?”

“Something did.” The four turned to see Caramel make himself known them. “He’s big, red and not somepony you want to get mad.”

“Caramel?!” Raindrops said in disbelief. “What are you doing here?”

“Big Mac sent me here to make sure that Ditzy didn’t leave on the train.” Caramel glanced at the unconscious stallion. “Kind of a moot point now isn’t it?”

“Big Mac sent you?” Trixie asked. “Why?”

“Because he’s off finding Dinky, why else?”

“You know where they took Dinky?!” Ditzy closed the gap between her and Caramel. “Where?”

“Sorry, can’t tell you.” Caramel said. “Big Mac told me to keep you safe and if I tell you, then you’ll want to go off to rescue her yourself.”

“Tell me where they’re keeping my daughter this instant!!”

Silver Script put a hoof on Ditzy’s shoulder. “Listen, maybe he has a point. I’d like to have a crack at the scum bags too but Big Mac might be Dinky’s best chance and we’d only get in his way.”

“But why are you and Big Mac involved in the first place?” Trixie asked.

“Because I asked them to get involved.” Silver Script admitted. “I went to them this morning hoping they could chase those thugs off before they did something like this.” He gave Caramel a brief glare. “Nice work on that front.”

“If you have any complaints about the service you have received, please feel free to visit our complaint department at Froggy Bottom Bog.” Caramel turned back to the mares. “Look, trust me, Big Mac is on the trail so the best for us to do is to stay out of his way and wait for him to bring Dinky home. Besides, it's not like he's hunting solo, Cheerilee's with him."

"The school Teacher?" Silver Script asked disbelievably, "No offence, but is she really the best bet for a rescue mission?"

"I'm sure this is an excellent subject for discussion but could continue this somewhere safer," Caramel looked around. “Preferably not here.”

“Why not?”

“Well I may have...sorta...sabotaged the train as a stalling tactic.” Caramel explained sheepishly. “We may not want to be here when they come to investigate.”

The midday sun beat down on Plata as he waited in the clearing. Dinky was still in the bag that she had been caught in, struggling and shouting.

“Quiet you.” Plata hissed. “Kids these days.” He then saw a large shadows being cast. Looking up he saw a mail wagon (or at least what was supposed to look like a mail wagon) being pulled by four Pegasi descending. “You took your sweet time getting here.”

“It’s not like you gave us a lot of notice.” The driver hoped off the wagon and approached Plata. “Considering that we took a major detour getting here I’d appreciate a little less lip.”

“Quit your whining. You’re getting paid double for this.” Plata turned attention back to the bag. “Now my friends are going to fly you first class to Manehatten. I suggest you stop struggling otherwise they may drop you.” At that moment Dinky’s horn stabbed through the bag. “What the..?”

The clearing was suddenly filled with a bright light. As the adults were blinded, Dinky used her magic to tear the bag open. Once she was free, she ran for it as fast as she could.

Dinky didn't know where she was but she knew that anywhere was better than here. Despite running as fast as she could, Plata, having recovered, soon caught up with her.

The filly came to an abrupt stop when Plata stomped down on her tail, preventing her from running any further. "Listen you little bruja, give me one good reason why I shouldn't snap that horn off."

"Ahem."

Plata looked up from Dinky and came face to face with an extremely angry Big Macintosh.

"I got one."

Any reply Plata was going to give was stopped by a hoof straight to his face.

At that moment the Pegasi had finally gotten over their temporary blindness and had caught up to the scene. Seeing their current employer laying on the ground in a daze and their meal ticket was currently being blocked by the red new comer, they decided to leap into action.

The driver and two others tried to charge Big Mac at the same time. The red stallion used his front hooves to swat two of them away as if they were flies and head butted the third. After taking what could be compared to a wrecking ball to the face, the third Pegasus went down and stayed there.

The first of the two remaining flew in and bucked Big Mac in the side of the head. Big Mac, only slightly fazed by the attack, put up his foreleg to block the on coming onslaught. When he saw an opening, Big Mac struck out, hitting an incoming hoof with his own. The Pegasus fell to ground and held his hoof in pain, only to be silenced by an upper cut.

Cheerilee raced up to Dinky. “Are you alright?” She asked the young filly.

Before Dinky could reply a Pegasus tried to attack the school teacher. As he stood up on his hind legs, Cheerilee raced in, driving her shoulder into the attacker's chest and unleashing a devasting series of gut punches. When she finally relented the stallion took a couple steps back and doubled over in pain. Cheerilee then finished him off with two hooves to the top of the head.

As she finished that, another stallion flew in, hoping to tackle her. Instead of dodging, Cheerilee stood her ground. When he was close enough, she jumped up, caught him in a reverse headlock and, using the weight change and the stallion's own momentum, drove him head first into the ground.

When Cheerilee stood back up, dusting herself off, the pegasus remained motionless.

“Alright!” The two earth ponies turned to see the driver was back up and was holding a crossbow that he had probably recovered from his wagon. “Don't move!”

“Hey genius, you've got one shot and two angry ponies,” Cheerilee replied. “Do the math.”

When realisation struck, the driver dropped the crossbow and took flight. As the pegasus tried to fly straight up and away, the two earth ponies shared a look. After a nod from Cheerilee, Big Mac held out his hooves. The school teacher jumped into them and as she did, the red farmer threw her skywards.

As she flew through the sky, Cheerilee let out a sharp whistle to get the driver's attention. The pegasus looked down in time to get a magenta hoof straight to the face.

When gravity finally caught up with Cheerilee and the now unconscious driver, she remaining calm descended, right into the waiting hooves of Big Mac while the pegasus had a destiny with hard ground.

Cheerilee chuckled as she looked up at Big Mac. “You haven't thrown me like that since that job you had in Hoofington.”

Big Mac let out a chuckle of his own. “Good times.”

The red bounty hunter then turned his head and saw the remaining Pegasus trying sneak up on him, wielding a large piece of wood as a club. When the Pegasus saw that he had been caught out and the annoyed looks Big Mac and Cheerilee were giving him, he let out a nervous chuckle. He then promptly used the piece of wood to knock himself out.

Big Mac rolled his eyes as he put Cheerilee down but then saw that Plata was trying to crawl away. The farmer stopped Plata’s retreat by stepping on the grey stallion’s tail. When the Manehattenite looked up at Big Mac in fear, the farmer offered eight words of explanation for his actions.

“You attacked a school and foalnapped a filly.”

Next thing Plata knew, he was being held by the Big Mac. He wondered what the point of this was until he saw Cheerilee approach, fire burning in her eyes.

“I'm going to make you regret being anywhere near my students.”

With no means of escape, Plata could only look on in horror as Cheerilee readied her hooves to deliver harsh justice, repeatedly. She then stopped when both she and Big Mac remembered that Dinky was busy watching this. Though not releasing Plata, the two earth ponies turned to Dinky. For a brief moment the three just looked at each other

"Violence is bad." Cheerilee said in a weak attempt not to be a bad example for the young filly.

"Yes, I know." Dinky replied before turning her back to him and covering her ears with her hooves. “Let me know when you’re finished.”

Desserts

Things were quiet at the representative house as the group waited for Big Mac’s return. They were in the lounge. Trixie on the couch, practising card tricks to calm herself whilst levitating an ice pack against the side of her face. Silver Script and Raindrops were busy finding a good place to leave the gagged and restrained Parley. Caramel was watching the door while Ditzy was pacing back and forth.

“It’s taking too long.” The grey mare said. “They should have been back by now.”

“It hasn’t been that long.” Caramel said. “Trust me, Big Mac has everything under control. Most likely he’s already on his way back.”

“How can you be so sure?” Ditzy demanded.

“Because I know Big Mac, that stallion is unstoppable even when he’s in good mood but these thugs have managed to get on his bad side.” Caramel said reassuringly. “The only thing we need to worry about is Big Mac leaving enough of those scum bags for questioning.”

*THACK*
“HRMP!!”

Everypony turned to see the restrained Parley dangling from the ceiling like a piñata while Silver Script stood there with the L&T Bat. Realising that he was being watched he quickly hid the bat behind his back and pointed towards Raindrops in an attempt to shift blame.

Trixie stood up from the couch and went to stand beside Ditzy as a form of comfort. “Wait 10 more minutes and if they’re not here by then we’ll go looking.”

*THACK*

“HRMP!!”

“Enough, Silver!” Trixie scolded.

Before any more could be said there was a knock at the door. Ditzy bolted straight for it and swung it open in time for a small filly to tackle her which turned into a big hug.

“Momma!” Dinky said happily.

Ditzy responded with the hug and returned it with gusto. “Oh Dinky, are you okay? I was so worried?"

"I'm alright, Big Mac and Cheerilee saved me."

"I love you so much, Dinky.”

“I love you too, Momma.”

The two stayed like that, just hugging each other and being so happy to be back together. Single tear feel down Ditzy's cheek as tried to recommit every sound, touch and smell to memory. Her daughter was back and most important, safe. No more words needed said, their world had been made whole again.

Big Mac and Cheerilee then walked through the doorway, smiling at the scene in front of them. Caramel smirked as he went to stand by the crimson stallion.

“Times like these are what make this job so worthwhile.”

“Eeyup.”

Big Mac then got pulled into surprise hug with Ditzy and Cheerilee. “Thank you.”

The big stallion looked like he might have been blushing under his red as he shrugged off the hug. “No problem.”

After all the adults present had taken the time shower the returned foal in boat loads of affection. Trixie approached the farmer.

“Look, I don’t want to sound ungrateful, cause I am really grateful, but as a Night Court Representative I have to ask: What did you do with the thugs that had foalnapped Dinky?”

Big Mac gestured towards to the door.

Everypony headed outside and found what appeared to be a mail wagon.

“A mail wagon?” Trixie asked in disbelief.

“Not a real one.” Silver Script remarked. “The wagon's an outdated model and the paint job is too shoddy to be government issue.”

Big Mac open the back to reveal seven restrained and unconscious stallions. Trixie and Ditzy edged closer to examine them.

“Recognise them?” Trixie asked.

Ditzy pointed to Plata and Plomo. “Those two were working with Parley. I don’t know about the other five.”

“Ahem.”

Trixie turned to see Big Mac holding out a note. The Representative took it and examined it. It was hastily written but still legible and at the top was Big Mac’s name and Bounty Hunting ID number.

These seven individuals that have been captured and detained were in the process of foal napping a young filly.

The two earth ponies should be charged for attacking the school and for foal napping.

The five pegasi, while not involved in the attack on the school, were intending to transport the foal napped individual, known as Dinky Doo, against her will to Manehattan and as such should be charged for being accessories to a foalnapping as well as impersonating mail carriers and carrying stolen and/or illegal items.

Though these are the only charges I am aware of, all seven appear to be career criminals and will most likely have other crimes they can be charged with.

As the one with bounty hunting authority, I take full responsibility for the actions taken to apprehend these criminals.

Any and all actions I have done in the process of capturing these five ponies were done with the safety of Miss Doo as my chief concern as well as ensuring that she was returned to her mother as soon as possible.

I request that this be taken into consideration if charges are brought against me for actions not covered under the Bounty Hunting Act or the Civilian Arrest Act.

Trixie looked up from the note and stared at Big Mac who just shrugged in return. After not getting any further answer she turned to Caramel who gave a shrug of his own.

“He's a writer.” Caramal replied

After getting statements from them, Trixie sent Ditzy and Dinky home, saying that she would let them know if there was any trouble but that there wasn’t any need for them to wait for the authorities to arrive.

Silver Script walked them home, treating them to a late lunch and ice cream on the way. As was expected Silver Script got strange looks for still carrying the bat but he did get 10% off the meal. At last they arrived back at their apartment. Dinky went in first but Ditzy paused at the door to say goodbye to the post master.

“Thank you for everything.”

“No worries, like I said I take care of my own.” Silver Script replied. “Though you know, since the students are getting the day off tomorrow, why don’t you have it off too?”

For once Ditzy didn’t argue. “Thank you.”

Silver Script nodded and took his leave.

“Wait!”

Silver Script stopped and turn back to Ditzy.

“I’ve been meaning to ask you for a while. Why did you name your bat ‘Love & Tolerance’?”

Silver Script smiled knowingly. “The same reason I named my sledge hammer ‘Gentle Persuasion’.”

At that he left. Ditzy walked into the apartment and then received another hug Dinky. The filly stayed like that for while, holding onto her mom.

“Momma” she finally said in a quiet voice. “Would it be alright if we stayed in for the rest of the day?”

Ditzy scooped up her daughter and held her close. “Of course we can.”

Big Mac and Caramel entered the kitchen. Big Mac was promptly tackled by Applebloom.

“Did you save her?”

The red stallion gave his sister a hug. “Eeyup.”

“Told you he would.” Granny Smith was sitting at the breakfast table. “I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, my grandson is the best bounty hunter Ponyville has ever had.”

“I just hope that ya taught them a good lesson of the physical kind.” Applejack had walked in to the kitchen when she heard Big Mac was back. “No good varmints think they can come into our town and attack Applebloom’s school like that. They’re probably the ones that messed with the train too.”

At that Caramel gave a nervous cough and tried to change the subject. “Hey Applejack, can I have Monday off?”

“No.” Applejack said flatly before raising a threatening hoof when she saw Caramel opening his mouth to argue. “Now don’t ya give me lip, yer already taking those two weeks off ta go visit yer family up north. Which is a pretty big favour considering that ya’ll be missing preparations for the Trottingham Farming Contest.”

“Oh come on, it’s just like every other farming contest you guys have been in.” Caramel argued. “What’s the worst that could happen?” Big Mac then whacked him on the back of the head. “Ow!! What was that for?”

“Tempting fate.”

At that Caramel left for home, while Applejack and Applebloom went out to finish their chores before night fall, leaving Big Mac and Granny Smith alone in the kitchen. The elderly mare smiled warmly at the large stallion. “Ya did yer folks proud today.”

Big Mac gave a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. Anyone else wouldn’t have noticed it but Granny Smith knew him too well to be fooled.

“Still worried about them, aren’t ya?”

The red farmer sighed as he sat down beside her. “Eeyup.”

Granny Smith gave her grandson a reassuring pat on the shoulder. “Look, I know you want to do everything in your power to make this world a safe place for the sake of your sisters but there are some battles that aren’t for you or me to face. I think you’re granddad said it best.”

“Do good...” Big Mac began.

“...and let fate worry if it was enough.” Granny Smith finished.

Big Mac nodded as he took an apple from the fruit bowl. He took a bite and winced in pain.

“What’s wrong?” Granny Smith asked, clearly concerned.

“Got bucked in the face.” Big Mac answered.

“Let’s take a look. Open up.” She ordered. Big Mac complied as she put on her glasses and came in for a closer look. “Hmm, nothing looks broken or loose.” She backed up and let him close his mouth again. “Give it a couple of days and if it still hurts we’ll take you to go see a doctor.” She then headed towards the fridge. “In the meantime, what you need is a big slice of apple pie.”

“With whipped cream?” Big Mac asked hopefully.

Granny Smith laughed as she put a slice of pie on a plate and then a bit dollop of whipped cream on top.

“Here you go.” She placed the plate in front of Big Mac. She then affectionately ruffled the part of his mane she could reach. “You big softie.”

Night time finally came for what had felt like one of the longest days Ditzy had had to date. And it seemed like her days had gotten a lot longer since Corona showed up. Still what mattered was that her little muffin was back where she belonged.

Dinky had gone to bed and Ditzy was just doing some cleaning up when there was a knock at the door. The grey mail mare opened the door to find Trixie standing there, levitating a tub of ice cream. “Um hi Trixie. What are you doing here?”

“Well firstly to tell you that it’s all been taken care off. Parley and company will be in Canterlot by now and can look forward to a personal one on one meeting with Princess Luna amongst other things. Secondly I wanted to know if you and Dinky wanted to help me eat this tub of Ice Cream.”

“Why?”

“Well I decided that after a day like today I needed ice cream but I couldn’t sit at home shovelling down a tub of ice cream by myself because that would be depressing, so I decided to come here instead.” Trixie explained. “I got double choc ripple.”

Ditzy eyed Trixie and the tub of ice cream. “Alright, but Dinky is already asleep so we’ll have to save some for her.”

After filling up a big bowlful and leaving it in the freezer for Dinky, the two mares crashed on the sofa with two spoons and started to dig in.

“So how’s Dinky doing?” Trixie asked.

“She’s doing okay. Better than she had last time.” Ditzy really hated the fact that there had been a ‘last time’. “But it’s hard to tell if she actually alright or if she’s just being brave for my sake. So are you sure they won’t be back.”

“Trust me, with the charges they're facing, those scum bags won’t be coming back.” Trixie assured her. “And the same goes for the lowlife who sent them.”

“Do they have any idea who it was?”

“Nothing definite but the going theory right now is that it was one of the Manehattan crime bosses hoping to make a fortune holding an element ransom.”

“Ransom?” Ditzy asked in disbelief. “We’re the one thing that can stop Corona and there are actually ponies trying to jeopardise that for money?”

“Well you see Ditzy. Everyone in Ponyville got a front row seat to what Corona can do and she also made her presence known in Canterlot. Everywhere else she is still almost treated like a myth granny’s tell their grandkids, as far as we know she has been keeping a low profile so some ponies find it hard to see her as a real threat.”

“So they’re idiots.” Ditzy surmised.

“Yeah pretty much.”

The two continued to eat the ice cream. A few more minutes Ditzy started to voice something that had been bugging her for a while. “Hey Trixie. If we’re the only thing that can stop Corona why hasn’t Princess Luna placed anymore protection in Ponyville to help keep us safe?”

Trixie paused and took a moment to make sure she worded her explanation right. “You know how as the Elements of Harmony Luna deemed us property of the people and can’t do us any special favours so that we can stay politically untouchable?” Ditzy nodded. “This is kind of the same thing. If Luna was to place extra guards or protection in Ponyville, just for our sakes, it would be like waving a big banner saying that the elements weren’t safe here.”

“And that would be bad.” Ditzy assumed.

“It wouldn’t be good.” Trixie answered. “If that happened then factions in the Night Court would argue that the elements should be moved to Canterlot for safe keeping.” She went on to explain. “That would then lead to arguments over where we should stay and who would be in charge of protecting us. It would be a political battle field and we would be in the middle of it.”

“That’s bad.”

“That’s politics.” Trixie knew that she was being brutally honest but this was one time when brutal honesty was needed. “Look I know it sucks that we have become targets just for doing the right thing but that’s how it is.”

“But it isn’t just us. It’s our loved ones too.” Ditzy replied. “How are we supposed to handle that?”

“By working smart and more importantly working together.” Trixie replied. “Look I know that you were worried about finding Dinky but there were better options than what you did. I could have contacted Luna for help. She can’t do us special favours but she doesn’t turn a blind eye to foal napping. Or least we could have gotten help from our friends. But instead of being able to do any of that I was stuck chasing after you and trying to make sure you didn’t get hurt and was knocked out for my troubles.”

Trixie looked at Ditzy sternly.

“We got lucky today, as-in-Sweet-Luna-I-wish-Ponyville-had-a-lottery-so-I-could-buy-a-ticket lucky, but we can’t afford to rely on luck and we can’t afford to fly off the handle.”

Ditzy looked down at the ground. “I’m sorry.”

Trixie realised she may have done too good a job at getting her point across. “It’s alright, the important thing is that we got both you and Dinky back.”

“No it’s not alright!” Ditzy shot back. “You were trying to help and I punched you. Then I completely lost it at the train station.”

“Come on, I wasn’t too fond of you punching me but that slime ball deserved it.”

“Deserved it?” Ditzy repeated. “I almost killed him.”

“You wouldn’t have killed him.” Trixie said dismissively.

“I dropped him from cloud height.” Ditzy shot back. “There is no way he would have survived that.”

“You caught him before he hit the ground.”

“I didn’t know that I’d be able to do that!”

Trixie paused. “What?”

“You know how bad my depth perception can be, especially when I’m flying. I have enough trouble sticking a safe landing let alone trying to catch anything that was falling too.” Ditzy said. “I took him up there knowing that if I let go he would most likely die before I could get to him... and I didn’t care.”

Ditzy leaned on the armrest and curled into a ball. “I was so angry...I didn’t care about what I did. I just wanted to hurt him.” She looked back at Trixie through teary eyes. “What sort pony does that make me?”

“It makes you a good pony and a great mother that’s had a really bad day.” Trixie put the ice cream on the coffee table and scooted closer to Ditzy. “You know, my mother once told me that if you weren’t willing to shed blood for the sake of your children, you didn’t have the right to call yourself a parent.”

Ditzy sat up and looked at Trixie. “Your mother said that?”

“Well technically she was my Aunt. That said she raised me like I was her daugher and yeah, she did say that. A little psychotic I know but still I used to think that she was the greatest mother in the world.”

“Used to?”

“Yeah a funny thing happened,” Trixie took a moment to feign sadness. “I moved to Ponyville and, as much as it hurt me to do it, after meeting you I was forced to move her to the number two slot.” Trixie then smiled Ditzy. “and guess what? The rankings still haven’t changed.”

Next thing Trixie knew, Ditzy was giving her a big hug. “I’m lucky to have a friend like you.” She whispered

“I’m the one who’s lucky." Trixie whispered back. "Don’t let anyone tell you differently.”

Finally the two disengaged from the hug. “So how about we get back to the ice cream?” Trixie suggested

“Ok but first.” Ditzy stood up and pulled Trixie to her hooves. “I want you to hit me.”

“What?”

“I hit you so it’s only fair that you hit me back.” Ditzy explained.

“Ditzy, this isn’t the playground. You said you’re sorry so let’s just leave it at that.”

“No, I won’t feel alright about this until you hit me.”

“I’m not gonna hit you.”

“Hit me!”

“I don’t see how this...”

“HIT ME!”

*THACK!*

“OW!”

“You okay Trixie?”

“No I’m not ok!” Trixie snapped as she clutched her hoof in pain. “You the one that got hit! Why am I the one that’s hurting?”

“Maybe you didn’t do it right.” Ditzy suggested. “Did you want to try again?”

“No I don’t want to try again! I want to go back to doing the thing that wasn’t causing me pain.”

Trixie sat back on the couch and scooped up a big spoonful of ice cream and stuck it in her mouth. She then clenched her teeth in agony as she experienced a massive brain freeze.

“Why do I even bother?”

Bonus Chapter: Encore Performance

Such a feelin's comin' over me
There is wonder in most everything I see
Not a cloud in the sky
Got the sun in my eyes
And I won't be surprised if it's a dream.

Ditzy and Dinky were in the shower, happily singing while working on getting each other clean. (Well it was more Ditzy trying to get Dinky clean but the young filly insisted on helping her momma get clean too)

Everything I want the world to be
Is now coming true especially for me
And the reason is clear
It's because you are here
You're the nearest thing to paradise I've seen

The next part was Dinky's favourite.

I'm on the top of the world lookin' down on creation
And the only explanation I can find
Is the love that I've found ever since you've been around
Your love's put me at the top of the world

What followed was the final rinse to get all soap out.

"There." Dinky said proudly. "All clean."

Ditzy looked thoughtfully at her daughter. "Actually, I think we missed a spot...right...there." She pointed towards Dinky's left cheek, and then blew a raspberry into it, causing Dinky to burst out laughing.

PFRTTT!

"ARGH HA HA HA!"

"There, all clean."

You keep saying you've got something for me.
something you call love, but confess.
You've been messin' where you shouldn't have been a messin'
and now someone else is gettin' all your best.

These hooves are made for walking, and that's just what they'll do
one of these days these hooves are gonna walk all over you.

You keep lying, when you oughta be truthin'
and you keep losin' when you oughta not bet.
You keep samin' when you oughta be changin'.
Now what's right is right, but you ain't been right yet.

These hooves are made for walking, and that's just what they'll do
one of these days these hooves are gonna walk all over you.

Cheerilee opened the bathroom door, feeling refreshed and ready to take whatever the day would throw at her.

"Are you ready hooves?" Cheerilee said, "Start walking!"

The teacher took a couple of confident steps forward before tripping on a loose bit of carpet. Having no way to stop the forward momentum, Cheerilee pushed off the tripped hoof and, through some miracle, did a forward flip before landing on her back hooves.

"Not bad," Berry Punch commented. "I'd give it a 6.8"

Cheerilee jumped a bit when she saw her sister. "What are you doing here?" She then processed what Berry Punch had said. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN 6.8?! That was a single hoof dismount with a forward flip and a two hooves landing to finish, that is at LEAST a 8.0."

"Sorry sis, the dismount was sloppy." Berry Punch replied before she started to walk off. "Don't feel bad. It's a deceptively difficult move to pull off perfectly and, let's be honest; I was always the better gymnast."

"HEY! GET BACK HERE!! WE'RE NOT DONE TALKING ABOUT THIS!!

Raindrops was in bliss, while a shower was no real substitute for actual rain, it still wasn’t a bad alternative.

Raindrops keep falling on my head
But that doesn't mean my eyes will soon be turnin' red
Crying's not for me
Cause I'm never gonna stop the rain by complainin'
Because I'm free
Nothing's worrying meeeeeECK!.

"Sorry!" Snails shouted through the bathroom door. "I had to use the toilet."

Raindrops took a couple of deep breaths before answering.

"That's alright Snails, just remember that plumbing in this house is all connected."

"I will!"

Raindrops took another couple of deep breaths before returning to her song.

RaindreeeeeECK!

"Sorry! I had to wash my hooves!"

I am the very model of a modern Major-General
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral
I know the Dukes of Heststed, and I quote the fights historical
From Cavallia to Garanha, in order categorical

I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse

With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotepotenuse

I'mverygoodatintegralanddifferentialcalculus
Iknowthescientificnamesofbeingsanimalculous
Inshort,inmattersvegetable,animal,andmineral
IamtheverymodelofamodernMajor-General!

Carrot Top stepped out of the shower and braced herself against the sink as she took in several deep breaths.

"Must...get...slower...shower...song..."

I'm nothing special, in fact I'm a bit of a bore
If I tell a joke, you've probably heard it before
But I have a talent, a wonderful way
how everyone listens when I start to play
I'm so grateful and proud
All I want is to sing it out loud

So I say
Thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing
Thanks for all the joy they're bringing
Who can live without it, I ask in all honesty
What would life be?
Without a song or a dance what are we?
So I say thank you for the music
For giving it to me

Being satisfied with her level of cleanliness, Lyra turned off the shower and levitated a towel over to herself. Once she was dry she stepped out of the shower and came face to face with Bon Bon, who was wearing a mischievous grin and looking at Lyra as if she was her next meal.

"What?"

Let’s make music together
Bon Bon closed the distance with a seductive saunter.
Let’s make sweet harmony
She then made a quick circle around Lyra before brushing hard up beside her.
Oh, let’s make music together, baby
Bon Bon's tail managed to somehow brush against the inside of Lyra's hind leg.
You take the do I’ll take the ray, you better hang on to me

Reading the warning signs, Lyra tried to make a quick exit. "Sorry Bon Bon but now isn't really the time."

Disengaging from the candy making temptress, Lyra made it out of bathroom but was soon cut off from going any further when Bon Bon got in front of her again.

We are birds of a feather
Looking for the right key
Oh, let’s make music together, baby
Cause only music makes a mare free

Despite what Bon Bon was doing, Lyra was somehow able summon up a scrap of resistance. "Come on Bon Bon, you've got to get ready for work."

"It's late start day today." Bon Bon reminded the musician.

Realisation hit Lyra like ton of bricks, at which point she lifted her marefriend into an intimate tango hold and picked up the tune herself.

Gonna make a beautiful song
Sing along,
gonna make that natural beat
Make it sweet
When the music’s deep down in you
There’s nothing that you can do
But believe, oh believe

The two mares then proceeded to tango their way to the bedroom.

There is nothing like singing
And our voices just blend
Oh, let’s make music together, baby
Lift our voices together partner
Let’s make music forever, baby
Together right to the end!

The two then leapt onto their bed, ready to take the term "Making music" away from the literal into oh-so-wonderfully metaphorical ...and promptly stopped when they realised they were sharing a bed with a small toothless alligator.

The ponies and the alligator stared blankly at each other. The reptile was then scooped up by PInkie Pie.

"Bad Gummy!" The pink mare scolded. "Interrupting their quiet time just because you thought it would be funny." Gummy blinked once. "Don't give me that look; I already told you, most ponies don't get meta-humour."

Pinkie stopped her scolding when she realised Bon Bon and Lyra were staring. "Quick Gummy!” She whispered to the alligator. “Escape Plan Beta!"

Pinkie held Gummy with one hoof, pulled out a top hat with the other and started to high-kick towards the door.

Hello! ma baby
Hello! ma honey
Hello! ma ragtime gal
Send me a kiss by wire
Baby, ma heart's on fire!
If you refuse me
Honey, you'll lose me
Then you'll be left alone
Oh, baby, telegram
And tell me I'm your own!

When the song ended, Pinkie ran for dear life.

The sound of running water in the representative's bathroom stopped. There was a brief pause before Trixie swung open shower curtain with a flourish and stepped out.

For what is a mare, what has she got?
If not herself, then she has naught!
To say the things she truly feels and not the words of one who kneels
The record shows I took the blows and did it my way!

The showmare caught an incoming bouquet of flowers, giving a bow of gratitude.

Yes it was my way.

"Bravo! Bravo!" Ditzy said, happily clopping her hooves to the ground in applause.

"Thank you, Ditzy. Nice timing with the bouquet." Trixie replied. "I didn't realise you did flower deliveries too."

"Only if they come from out of town." Ditzy explained.

"Fair enough." Trixie replied before thoughtfully looking at the bouquet. "Hm, wonder who sent it."

After briefly inspecting the bouquet, Trixie found a note attached.

Dear Trixie

Always thinking of you

Love

Hex Node

Trajectory was walking past the Representative's house when a bouquet of flowers unexpectantly collided with his head. He looked around but he saw no obivious culprit. His mind then went what, to him at least, was the most logical conclusion.

He looked up at the sun "So you've finally acknowledged me as a threat." Despite the sun not replying the burly unicorn developed a look of satisfaction. "Well the first hit goes to you, my flamming adversary, BUT PREPARE FOR RETALIATION!!!"

He then ran off to get his catapult.

Author's Note

This is a bit of fun that the "wiki walk" also known my mind came up with and just demanded that I put it to paper. I was originally going to post it as its own story but then I realised that it really didn't stand alone. I will leave it to you the reader on whether or not you view it as canon cause the point of this is "fun" and not much else. Regardless hope you enjoyed it.

And now for something completely different

The next day Big Mac was manning the stall. It was a slow day so it was just him.

“Um hi.” Big Mac turned to see Trixie standing there. “Are you free to talk?”

Big Mac looked left and right to check for potential customers, when he saw none he replied with an “Eeyup.”

The representative pulled out a cheque. “I wanted to give you this.”

Big Mac took the cheque and inspected it, it was the usual government approved cheque that Bounty hunters received when they brought in a bounty.

“Turns out the leader of the pegusi you took down had a bounty on his head over some smuggling charges.” Trixie explained. “The government decided to give a retroactive bounties for Plata and Plomo due the serious nature of their crimes.”

Big Mac looked down at the figure again. While it wasn't the biggest payout he had received for a hunt, it certainly was more than what he was expecting. When he looked back up he saw Trixie pull out a big bag of bits.

“There also was a retroactive bounty for Parley,” Trixie explained. “Now I know you didn't catch Parley but civilians can't collect bounties so I sort of told the authorities that you caught him.” Big Mac raised an eyebrow, wondering where she was going with this. “Though that means that this money technically belongs to you I was hoping to give it to Ditzy since she was the one who caught him.”

Big Mac nodded in understanding. “Sure.”

Gratefully Trixie put the money away. She was about to say goodbye and walk away when something stopped her. She turned back to the farmer and prepared herself to do something that was never fun to do.

“Big Macintosh. I just wanted to say, I'm sorry for accusing you.” Trixie in a deep breath. “It wasn't right of me to assume that you were up to something and maybe if I hadn't been so focused on trying to prove that you were trouble I might have been able to stop those mobsters before they took Dinky.”

Big Mac personally doubted that but didn't know the situation well enough to judge. “Apology accepted.”

Trixie smiled gratefully, happy that, for once, an apology was enough. Still something

“Look, I know this might seem like I'm taking a step backwards but I'm still curious, why let Cheerilee know about a job offer that could potentially leave your sister's school in the lurch?

Big Mac shrugged. “She's my friend.”

“So that's all it ever was?” Trixie asked. “You letting a friend know about a great career opportunity?”

“Eeyup.” He then gave a kind smile to the look of disbelief Trixie was giving him. “Not everything's a conspiracy.”

Trixie sighed. “Guess not, but when you deal with the Night Court as much as I do, it starts to feel that way.”

“Buck that.” Big Mac said plainly with a shake of his head.

“Hey! we're not all that bad.”

The stallion shrugged. “Maybe not.” He then smiled again and placed a juicy red apple on the counter in front of Trixie. “On the house.”

"Thanks." Trixie said gratefully as she took the apple.

As Trixie turned and start to walk off she ran into Applebloom.

"Did you pay fer that apple?"

It was a few days after the incident with the stallions from Manehattan. For the most part things in Ponyville returned to the way it had been. Even the school was back to normal, with the exception of Cheerilee having instigated drills in case of something like this happened again.

Big Mac and Caramel returned to most of their energy being spent on Apple farming, with some exceptions. Trixie still wasn't sure that she understood the red farmer but she made peace with it knowing she had other things to worry about.

Trixie still hadn't received word about whom it was that had sent Parley's crew but seeing as it was someone in Manehattan it was out of her reach anyway.

And so the town of Ponyville returned to normal for everyone though what had been surprising was ultimately how little of a ripple it had made for the ponies that weren't directly involved. It seemed that the constant threat of living on the edge of the Everfree Forest meant that the general populous had learnt to quickly get on with their lives no matter what disaster occurred.

Trixie still wasn't sure if this was a sign of the town possessing great fortitude and a drive to move forward or if showed a collective self delusion. Either way the longer Trixie stayed in Ponyville, the easier she found it to get on with life as well. What ever happened was going to happen but so long as she had friends, belief in herself and a bottle of bourbon that was at least halfway full there was nothing she couldn't face.

Though her morning ritual did help as well.

Aaaaaaaaaare you gonna take me home tonight?
Ooooooooooh, down beside that red firelight;
Aaaaaaaaaare you gonna let it all hang out?
Fat bottomed mares,
You make the rockin' world go round.

Trixie stepped out of the shower and started to towel herself off to the beat of the tune in her head.

I was just a skinny lad
Never knew no good from bad,
But I knew life before I left my nursery,
Left alone with big fat Fanny,
She was such a naughty nanny!
Hey big lady you made a bad colt out of me!

She did a quick whip around and came face to face with Ditzy.

"Hi Trixie." The mail mare said cheerfully.

"Oh hi Ditzy. Did you have another parcel for me?"

"No. I just really like this song."

Trixie stared at the mail mare before a mischievous smile developed on her face.

"Well in that case, next verse is yours."

At that Trixie started strumming her air guitar. Ditzy tapped her hoof and swayed her hips as she made sure she had the beat. She then let loose.

I've been singing with my band
Across the water, across the land,
I seen ev'ry blue eyed floozy on the way, hey.
But their beauty and their style
Went kind of smooth after a while.
Take me to them lovely ladies every time!

"C'mon," Trixie said as she and Ditzy began to sing the chorus together.

Ooooooooh won't you take me home tonight?
Ooooooooh down beside your red firelight,
Ooooooooh and you give it all you got
Fat bottomed mares you make the rockin' world go round
Fat bottomed mares you make the rockin' world go round

As they finished the chorus, Pokey appeared between the two mares and started singing the next verse.

Now I got mortgages on homes
I got stiffness in my bones
Ain't no beauty queens in this locality. (I tell ya!)
Oh, but I still get my pleasure
Still got my greatest treasure.
Heap big lady you done made a bad colt of me!

Ditzy and Trixie were too wrapped up in the song to care about the intrusion and soon the three were singing the last chorus.

Ooooooooh, (i know) you gonna take me home tonight (please)
Ooooooooh, down beside that red firelight
Ooooooooh, you gonna let it all hang out
Fat bottomed mares you make the rockin' world go round
Fat bottomed mares you make the rockin' world go round

At the end of the song there was silence that quickly turned awkward.

Pokey was the first to break it with a cough and then speaking. "I just wanted to let you know that the weekly rain report from the weather team has arrived."

"Brilliant!" Trixie sounded a little too excited about a report that she had in the past compared to paint drying. "Listen Ditzy I should probably get to it."

"Sure." Ditzy replied. "See you later."

Trixie and Pokey scurried out of the bathroom.

Ditzy waited for moment to make sure she was alone. She then stood up on her hind legs, using her wings to kept balance, and raised her hoof up in triumph.

"Thank you Ponyville!"