Shifted

The buildings were amazing to Luna, in the fact that they hadn’t all fallen into rubble. “Where are you taking Us, me?” Luna asked twenty minutes into their trek through the maze of streets and alleys.

“Hush! Hear that?” Phil whispered

“No?” Luna whispered, her ears moving with purpose.

“Dang it,” he huffed, “you were supposed to say ‘nay’.” The group chuckled.

“I do not find that humorous. How much farther, I ask again.”

“A couple blocks. Keep yer… what are those?”

“My royal hoofwear? It is enchanted to keep me from tiring from long days on my hooves and it keeps my hooves from growing. Using a farrier is undignified,” she said raising her chin, “and modern spa’s are full of ‘snobs’.”

“So, what do you do? File them yourself? I know a thing or two about horses,” Viv asked.

“Indeed I do, or my sister assists me whilst we converse about the time I was away.”

“Two blocks. What do you mean? You keep going on about the moon, why?”

Luna blinked at Dave but didn’t answer, instead she turned the mirror to reflect her injured wing. “Bah, a wound as simple as this and I am flightless. In a battle worse than any you know I nearly lost my other wing and flew with it hanging by a thread of skin and bone,” she sighed, “a few months without combat and I’m as weak as a newborn foal.”

“I wouldn’t go that far, Luna,” Viv replied, “I’ve never heard of a foal blasting two death heads out of the sky.”

“What is this you speaketh of, death heads? Are they the metal machines we fought earlier?”

“Hey, she figured it out finally,” Viv sarcastically quipped, “yeah, and they’re piloted by human extremists. Cross them, even if you’re pure human, and they’ll as soon kill you as capture you. I guess it’s a gift you showed up, we never could have taken down a spider walker without you, then the two boomers up there…” she shook her head, “thanks.”

Luna’s ears swiveled around. “Hush, do you hear that?” The others stopped and took a knee, ready to fight. “It’s the sound of arrogance leaving.”

“...”

“Did, did she just tell a joke?”

“Hey, at least she’s not trying to kill us. Let’s hurry, this doesn’t bode well for us.”

They began walking again with Luna smirking at her humor.

“Bode well for us? You got a pony on your tongue?” Phil asked Raul.

“Not yet… Damnit,” he facepalmed as the others, excluding the females, began to tease Raul for his slip up.

“Nay, nae’er shall I fornicate with a human. Peradventure, Our body is a temple worthy of only the highest pedigree of stallion, and even then it is Our choice on whom may enter,” Luna proclaimed.

“Hey, if Raul wants a woman… or pony, he’ll get her.”

“Shut. up, Phil.”

Luna chuckled as they began to walk into a multi storied building that was in shambles. “Thy ribbed thee well, and as such thou are the posterior of their jokes, Raul.”

“Shh, this is our home and I say the first rule is no royal-ancient-mumbo-jumbo speak. Thee, thy, thou is not allowed in here,” Viv turned and stopped before Luna, “or you can go clippity clop your magic shoes anywhere else.”

Luna’s eye twitched and her nostrils flared just as Phil jumped between the two. “Alright, you two, don’t start again. We’re home. We’re safe here, just stay calm and quiet, please,” he pleaded to the two females.

Luna scoffed. “Humph, safe is a relative term. This building shall fall upon us at the first sneeze of a titmouse.”

“This is an old bomb shelter inside the building. If the building falls it’ll bury this room and we’ll get out another way.”

“Like blowing our way out!” Dave added excitedly.

Luna raised an eyebrow. “Certainly you jest. You have the power to blow a building over?”

Dave facepalmed.

“Anyway, we all know Dave blows, let’s chill and see what that book of yours has to offer in the ways of calling a god to help us out,” Raul said as he took off his helmet. Luna blinked as she looked at the dark skinned man with small brown eyes that looked to hold compassion that rivaled any she’d seen in any human before.

Her hopes rose as she saw the others taking their helmets off, and fell as they looked at her. Phil was pasty white with scars across his face and he smiled a missing tooth smile. Dave was blue and had two yellow orbs where his eyes should be. He spoke through a slit in the side of his face.

“What? Never seen a Noodo Poth before?”

“Nay, I honestly have seen none of your kind, yet it is an honor to be the first of my kind to grace thy… your presence. And Viv, what manner of creature are you?”

Viv finished removing her helmet and a beautiful woman, even by pony standards, looked back from under dirty blonde bangs. “I’m a human, you idiot. Now open that mirror and jump through. I’m sure you’ll be fine,” she said sweetly in a manner that would have convinced a lesser pony to do as she said.

“I see your charms are quite suited for you, however I am royalty and as such will not falter in my goals and drive. I will return home to Equestria, when the portal opens as such. It seems I am unable to open it, however my sister has many archmages capable of finding me across the voids.”

The men had left the women to talk and taken to their own areas. “Well, let’s hope it’s soon,” Viv dropped her sweet voice and said firmly, “you’re a royal pain and liability. Gentlemen,” she addressed the room while staring down Luna, “my contract with you is over. I’ll take my payment and leave tomorrow.”

The men suddenly were at attention. “Wait, you can’t-”

“The deal was I get you and your shifter to the mirror. I’ve done my part and now you do yours, or is there no honor here?”

Phil and Raul winced while Dave stood from his desk, leaving an assortment of technology behind. “You asked and we will pay. If you want to continue traveling and adventuring with us we extend-”

“Shut it and pay me. I’m going to bed, oh wait, my bed is buried under ten tons of robot! Just like my weapons and personal stuff,” she glared between the men, “I wouldn’t travel with you for anything you have to offer.”

“Mayhaps I can offer something?” Luna added. “I have seen you in combat and would be more than willing to pay you from the Canterlot royal treasury a sum that would replace anything you may have lost, plus expenses until such a time as I return home. Perhaps ten bits a day,” she smiled and bowed her head slightly, “for [each] of you per day.”

“A bit? Whatever that is I want no part of it,” Viv hissed, “I’m gone in the morning, you boys keep your horse and ride her to hell and back for all I care.”

“Okay, fine,” Raul said as he reached to his sides and unfastened his armor, letting it slide down his arms exposing an upper body that both females couldn’t help but stare at. Rippling muscles and glistening sweat traced the tight flesh that showed the muscle that lies beneath. Luna blinked and looked away first, taking interest in the table Phil had left while Viv cleared her throat and looked to Phil.

“You want payment, you get your stinkin’ payment. If we cross paths again, then so be it,” he said in a sudden accent that Luna couldn’t place, “here,” he reached into his armor, a pocket that was hidden, and pulled out a card, then tossed it to Viv who tried to catch it and fumbled between her weapon and the card, dropping them both in a loud clatter.

Luna’s ears were flat to her head as she chuckled. “Nice catch, verily. As thy are no longer a member of the party, thy rules are not privy to me. However,” she relented under Viv’s kneeling position where she cast a glare from the floor, “I will practice my modern speech. As such, I have a request that all will agree with,” she looked between the group and licked her lips, “breakfast?”

“It’s lunchtime here, you steward of pains.”

Luna finally glared and her horn flared to life, enveloping Viv who squeaked in surprise. “I am steward of the moon,” she said moving the paralysed woman to the edge of her muzzle, “understand?” she snorted a steamy breath onto Viv’s face. “I am no whelp to be insulted at a whim.” Viv glared, but nodded.