Author's Note

Heeeeyyyyyyyyy, new chapter.

III. Helping a Friend

"5 O'clock in the goddamn morning." Wolfgang grumbled as he walked on the grassy fields of Ponyville. He looked back at the basket he was carrying and sighed. Waking up early wasn't new to Wolfgang, but that was when he forwent sleep, having Fluttershy wake him was a whole different experience entirely. He couldn't complain too much, he did get a very "exotic" wake up call, but that didn't mean he wasn't annoyed either. Wolfgang's task at hand was to deliver some of Fluttershy's baked cookies to the couple's mutual friend's, the Zebra family.

Of course, Zebra was not their surname, but their real name's were very hard to pronounce for the pony populace. It became a town consensus to refer to them with nicknames, which they were fine with. From what Wolfgang remembered before his first meeting with them, Fluttershy had told him that before his arrival, the Zebra family were the new residents in Ponyville. Fluttershy initially wanted him to meet them so that he may gain some friends outside of her and her group of friends. Wolfgang was resistant at first, but he cozied up to the idea once he got to know them.

His vision was slightly hazy, yet Wolfgang managed to spot the white and red house at the near end of town. He walked up to the red door and knocked a couple times, hoping this visit would be quick. Within a few seconds, the door opened to reveal the stallion of the house, Ziggy. Ziggy was Fluttershy's main candidate for a friend for Wolfgang, his lax attitude would help counter his original angry demeanor. Zigg's green eyes, which were partially hidden by his long black and white dreadlocks, focused on the figure at the front entrance. Wolfgang could tell he was tired too, the ropes of mane more unkempt than usual. His attire wasn't much better either, a gray T-shirt and some boxer with a teddy pattern.

Once his eyes adjusted, Ziggy made out the gruff face of his human friend. With his muzzle curling into a smile, he grabbed Wolfgang into a hug and spoke words of his native tongue. Wolfgang didn't bother to understand what he was saying, having given up on understanding the differences between Jamaican and Zebmaican a long time ago. He wrestled himself out of the mellow zebra's grip and sighed. "Morning Zigg's, look, I've got cookies from Flutter's, you want 'em?" Wolfgang asked as he held up the basket.

Ziggy blinked for a few seconds until his smile came back to him. "Yeah, of course, come in, come in." Ziggy gestured for him to enter, although Wolfgang really didn't want to.

"Zigg's, I just want to go home and go back to bed. Can you just take the basket and I'll be on my way?" Wolfgang tried to appeal to Ziggy's sense of "wanting to sleep for ever", but it did not work.

"But we haven't talked since last month man." Ziggy stated.

"We talked two days ago." Wolfgang deadpanned.

"Yeah, but if feels like a life time for this zebra!"

"A life time is pretty long Zigg's, a month is at least 30 days."

"Come on WolfDren, Me zickneys' would love to see their Uncle." Boom, two trump cards in one. The first was his nickname, WolfDren, which he oddly had a soft spot for. Whenever Ziggy would use that nickname, Wolfgang almost knew for certain that he couldn't back down. The second and most crucial was the old "My kids want to see you!" card. The zebra family consisted of Ziggy, his wife, and their two children. Wolfgang was acquainted with the whole family on his first visit, the kids most wanting him to come back for a second meeting. Despite his cold demeanor, Wolfgang warmed up to the children and allowed them to refer to him as "Uncle".

"... Fine, but only for a little bit." Wolfgang relented and walked into the house with Ziggy close behind. Ziggy lead Wolfgang to the living room, where a decent sized collapsible table for a familial unit was in the middle. "What happened to the table in your kitchen?" Wolfgang questioned as he took a seat on one of the chairs.

"Broke, me and Zeora were, eh, rough-housing on it." Ziggy said sheepishly.

"Ha, what you tell the boys?" Wolfgang chuckled as he put his arms behind his head.

"The table collapsed, Ruzel was skeptical, but it's water under the bridge now."

"Why did you give your kids such exotic names?"

"Me and my soulmate like to keep tradition."

"Yeah, but it's pretty non-conventional"

"Well, we aren't 'conventional' like that, yeah?" The mellow zebra sat down on his seat, which had his initials inscribed on the top. A loud yawn came from the kitchen, Wolfgang and Ziggy looking back at the source. A zebra woman stood at the open entrance of the kitchen wearing a pink tank top and some pajama pants. She walked over to Ziggy with a bagel, a knife, and a container of cream cheese and put it on the table.

"So we ain't got any food in the fridge, so I'm gonna have to go to the market or something." Zeora wiped her eyes as she kissed her husband on the cheek.

"What about the zickneys' dear?" Ziggy took the knife and began smothering cream cheese on the bagel.

"I got two oatmeals and the last remnants of some cereal. Now, we could still sav-" She stopped her sentence when she opened her eyes, spotting the familiar guest across the table. "Oh, what brings you around this part of town? The bunny ran out of the cot again?"

"No, thankfully, my lovely headmare baked your family some cookies." Wolfgang placed the basket onto the top of the table.

"My, my," Zeora observed the basket of treats on her table, "These are a mighty fine gift from Fluttershy, course she could have sent herself here instead of her gruff colt toy." She winked at her guest and Wolfgang smiled back. Like many of the ponies Wolfgang met in this town, he and Zeora did not really speak so casually at first. It took some convincing from her husband to engage in conversation with Wolfgang, but Zeora did it eventually. Now, the two can consider themselves friends, though Fluttershy and Zeora were more friendly with each other.

"You and me both." Wolfgang stated with a matter of fact. "By the way, what the hell are you two doing up at this time in the morning?"

"Early to bed, early to rise, keeps the zebra healthy, wealthy, and wise." Ziggy chuckled and took a bite of his bagel. Wolfgang rolled his eyes and leaned back in the chair. "What? It's true!"

"I'm sure it is Zigg's, I'm sure it is."

"Why does Baltimare's Hoofball team suck?" Wolfgang reclined on his chair in the living room as he and Ziggy watched a taped game on a small television set. It was now 6:30 and Zeora had left for work. She worked as a secretary for the water company in Ponyville, so she had a reason to get up early. Although, according to Ziggy, Zebrican Equestrians got up early all the time, though he didn't have the evidence to back that claim.

"They got a new coach for the season, turns out he's got his head in the clouds more than the native Zebmaicans." He joked as he watched the game. Sports was treated in a way very similar to Wolfgang's home, the only difference being the type of games. Hoofball was the most recognizable to him, so it became his main sport to watch. It also helped that Ziggy had an interest in the sport as well. Above him, Wolfgang heard the soft pitter-patter of feet.

"Your kids are up now?" He questioned, turning his head to the zebra father.

"We live pretty far from their school, so they get up at this time." Ziggy said as he looked toward the stairs, waiting for his children to come down. Within a minute, two young zebra's came down with toothbrushes in their mouths. One of them was taller by an inch and had the traditional zebra mane that stuck up like a mohawk. The other was smaller and had his mane drip down to the left of his head. They both wore white T-shirts and blue shorts, thought the older one's was more worn out.

"Ey! Good morning zickneys'!" Ziggy exclaimed as he rose from his seat to hug his boys. The young zebras groaned, the cheery mood in the morning was not a trait that they shared with their father. They looked over to the chair to spot Wolfgang watching the father and sons. He gave a brief wave and the two boys' eyes popped open. They both separated from their dad and took immediate attention to their house guest, well, one of them did. The younger one stood over to the left of Wolfgang as he beamed with excitement.

"Hi Uncle Wolf!" He exclaimed, his eyes still filled with the same wonderment he had the first time he laid eyes on his surrogate relative. Wolfgang let a smirk form on his face as he looked at the young zebra.

"Good morning Ruzel." Since their first meeting, Ruzel took immediate interest in this strange creature that was in his house. Wolfgang found his curiosity annoying at first, but the kid's innocence warmed him up quickly. Although, the 8 year old was much more fascinated by Wolfgang's "humanness" than his older sibling by 2 years. The older brother past the two with a mumble vaguely translating to "G'morning", heading straight to the kitchen. Wolfgang chuckled, "Al ain't much of a morning zebra huh?" He looked towards Ruzel.

"Not until he has his cereal." Ruzel stated proudly as looked towards his brother, who poured the last of the cereal into a bowl.

"You sure want that Alabasta?" Ziggy asked his oldest son as he went to make his youngest some oatmeal, "There's not much in there." Alabasta looked at the small amount of cereal in his bowl, but shrugged and got the milk.

"I'll manage Fada." Al got a spoon and sat down at the table in the living room. After a few minutes, Ziggy came out with a bowl of oatmeal and left it on the table for his youngest to eat. Ruzel gave a small wave as he ran to the table to eat his oatmeal with his brother.

"Once you two are done eating, get dressed." Ziggy said, getting a mouth-filled "ok" from his kids. Wolfgang relaxed and watched the TV as Ziggy made his way back to his chair. Wolfgang could never see himself having a family with anyone or pony. He didn't have to worry about that though, he was told a long time ago that his sperm wasn't compatible for making foals. Even now, as he sees family after family in this town, he still couldn't believe the idea that a functioning family unit could work.

But that was just his psychotic views.

"Bye Fada!" The kids yelled out as they ran out the door to run to school. Ziggy looked out and waved to his sons and shouted for them to be safe. Wolfgang stretched out and thought it was time for him to leave. Ziggy looked at the standing human got a confused look on his muzzle. "Heading off somewhere WolfDren?" Ziggy asked as Wolfgang yawned in place.

"Wha-Oh, I was just going to head out, ya know. Thought I would let you enjoy your time in the house or something." Wolfgang started to walk to the door, not knowing behind him that his friend had a devilish smirk.

"You sure, I thought we could jam on my drums, guess you playing the piano was a one time thing huh?" Wolfgang turned around faster than he ever did before, a state of shock ran through his body.

"How do you know about that!" Wolfgang asked frantically as looked from side to side as if they were being watched. Ziggy chuckled as he went and closed the front door to his house.

"I was buying some apple seeds when a certain mare decided to spill how you finally touched an instrument after saying a billion times that you can make music." Ziggy decided to head downstairs to the basement, with a frantic Wolfgang behind him.

"That was two days ago! Why would she talk about, and with you! How does she know you!"

"I meet Applejack before you did WolfDren, what's the big deal?"

"Big Deal! Big... Deal. Nothing, it's nothing, I'm being stupid is all." Wolfgang calmed himself and looked around him, only to see drum after drum. The entire basement was lined up with percussion instruments of every sort. There were bongos, snares, and even some wood blocks to name a few. "Christ on a bicycle, how many percussion instruments do you need?"

"I like collecting 'em, but that was a long time ago." Ziggy circled around a drum set located in the center of the basement. It was a simple kit, comprising of a snare drum, bass drum, hi-hat, floor tom, two toms and two cymbals. "Ain't she a beauty, nice red kit, real good sound." Ziggy proclaimed as he sat down on his throne.

"Yeah, it's good, but back on my question Zigg's, why all the stuff?" Wolfgang asked, casually looking at some old bass drums.

"I told you, I collected this stuff, though now I only need my Red Temptress here." The zebra replied.

"So what are you going to do with all this stuff then?"

"That's what I wanted to see if you could help me with."

"Hmm?"

"You know how you work at that music store right?" Wolfgang put a hand to his faced and dragged it down. He did indeed work at a record store that also sold instruments, but today was Wolfgang's day off. Wolfgang looked at Ziggy, who had a look on his face as if selling these instruments was a matter of life or death.

"Ok, so what I'm getting out of this exchange is that you want me, your half-the-time-drunk friend, to go in his place of work, on his day effin' off mind you, and buy your old shit." Wolfgang deadpanned with a look of pure irritation on his face, but that didn't stop Ziggy from nodding frantically. "Ugh, if this was a year earlier, I'd fucking walk out by now. Alright, fine, let me just write down all of the stuff you want to sell and I'll look into it with my bosses."

"Thank you, Thank you Wolfdren!" Ziggy nearly bounced off his throne as he ran to shake Wolfgang's hand. "I swear to you, I owe you one big time huh‽" Despite the expression of his face, Wolfgang was silently happy that he was doing something nice for a being he called friend. "Let me go get some paper and will go through the items, yeah?" Wolfgang had no time to respond as Ziggy ran up the stairs to find a piece of paper. He chuckled, somehow he made his day longer than he wanted it, but maybe it was for the better?

Wolfgang and Ziggy were now out of the house and walking towards the "Tunes & Jams", a store that sold both records and instruments. The shop managed to make a decent income, despite the very ridiculous name and off the wall owners. Well, from Wolfgang's experience, at least one of them was off the wall, the other was much calmer in comparison. He looked around as he strolled, noticing a far more number of stares than he usually received. "Seems whenever were out together, we cause more attention than needed."

"Yeah, sorry about that WolfDren..."

"Huh? There's no need to apolog- are you hiding with your dreads‽" Wolfgang couldn't help but stare as his companion was using his dreadlocks to hide his face.

"What? It's comforting, and my mane can handle the job." Ziggy protested while almost stumbling over himself.

"Listen, it goes down to the end of your neck and it barely does shit. Also, you need to stop hanging around Fluttershy, her habits may be rubbing off." Wolfgang gave a quick flick to the back of the zebra's head, causing him to stop holding his mane for "shelter".

"C'mon, I've got some justification. Back from where I come from-"

"The place with the deadly anteaters."

"Whatever, anyway, back there it was so... Carefree. Like, no one had any qualms with each other or anything. It was like paradise on Equis if you ask me."

Wolfgang grew a sour look and kicked a pebble out of his way "Well, aren't you lucky."

Ziggy continued on, paying no mind to his friend's change of mood. "Then I came here in Equestria and, well, it was horrible. Ponies from left and right all gave me looks of scorn and I had to move to Fillydelphia because of it."

"Where were you before?"

"Baltimare."

"Ah." Wolfgang understood fully now, the inhabitants of Baltimare were quite the close-minded citizens.

"I just don't understand, why be so hateful to a pony or zebra that you never even meet?" Ziggy questioned openly, but knew the answer all too well. Wolfgang sighed and stopped in place, Ziggy doing the same with confusion.

"Listen Zigg's, I'm gonna come off like an asshole for saying this, but quit your whining. I get it, Ponies judged you only because you're a zebra and nothing else. Ponies are highly, how would you say, intolerant to other species and their culture, trust me, I know. You and I both know, however, that everypony, everyzebra, griffon, dragon, whatever, they all do it. And you know what, I can guarantee you plenty of species here go through or have gone through the same thing. You've gone through it, your wife's gone through it, and whether we like it or not, your kids are gonna go through it." There was a heavy moment of silence between the two.

Wolfgang sighed and took out his flask, taking a shot of the whiskey inside. "First strike." He stated with a matter-of-fact tone. He knew of Ziggy's discomfort of being out in public, his experiences in Baltimare leaving an impact on him. Unlike with Wolfgang's problems, however, Ziggy is at least attempting to work through his social anxiety. "Alright, come on, before the store closes." Wolfgang said and started walking, his friend following close behind.

"Guess you have only two more shots, huh?" Ziggy asked, trying to forget about the talk just moments later.

"Yup, it's annoying, but it's working." Wolfgang confirmed. He stopped in his tracks and looked at the white and black store, staring into the windows to spot one of his bosses at the front counter. To his dismay, they weren't, which meant only one thing that Wolfgang had to do.

"Great... Ok." He pushed open the store doors and held one open for Ziggy, who hastily walked in. "Right, so here's the deal, I'm gonna go to the back and get my boss's permission to confirm the sale."

"They doing anything important?" Ziggy asked as he looked at some CD's.

"Well, maybe to them." And with that, Wolfgang went to the back of the store, leaving Ziggy to look through all the CD's. He passed the changing room and found the office where his bosses did their work. He leaned in to hear the noises he was hoping weren't gonna happen when he came, moans. Knowing the task he must now do, Wolfgang took out his flask and downed another shot. With as much speed as he could muster, Wolfgang opened and closed the door silently, only to gaze open his bosses engaging in coitus.

Laying on a table in the middle of the workspace was a goldish gray Earth Pony with a messy dark gray mane. She was sweating a bit as her lover ate her out on the decently sized table. Her lover was a white unicorn with a cobalt blue mane and cyan stripes. Her hands grasped the Earth Pony's buttocks needily, slightly hiding the purple treble clef cutie mark. Wolfgang was distracted by the Earth Pony's E cup breasts swaying from side to side for just a moment before snapping his head back into reality. "YO!" He shouted to gain their attention, which proved successful for the Earth Pony, who jolted her head in his direction.

There was an uncomfortable silence between the two, the Unicorn continued to lick her marefriend. After what felt like eons, the Earth Pony screeched and fell off the table where she was being pleasured. The White Unicorn gave a confused look, though it was hard to tell from the large purple lensed glasses obscuring her eyes. She looked to Wolfgang and smiled, giving a wave to the employee that just saw his two employers have sex... Again.

"M-M-MR. CHARLESTON! WHAT ON EQUIS ARE YOU DOING BACK HERE!" Shouted an exasperated voice that now hid behind a table.

Wolfgang sighed and held the bridge of his nose. "It's good to see you too Ms. Melody," Wolfgang looked to the Unicorn, "And you as well Ms. Scratch," Ms. Scratch then crossed her arms, "R-Right, Vinyl. Look, believe you me when I say I don't want to be here on my day off, but I know a friend with a lot of percussion shit and was wondering if I can confirm a sale." Wolfgang looked to the wall to his right to avert his eyes from the two exposed mares. However, Vinyl snuck up to him and wrapped her right arm around his neck. Using her free hand, she forced her sole employee to look at her and raised up her thumb. Ms. Melody slowly raised from the ground, using both her arms to cover her chest.

"I believe Vinyl is giving her ok to that notion, and I will as well," She then gave Wolfgang a glare, "Now please get out of our office." Without any lip, Wolfgang separated from Vinyl and left the room. He began to pace himself back to the front of the store, a small part of him was hoping he would hear some lustful moans. Alas, no such noise was made after nearing the front, and so Wolfgang begrudgingly went back to the cash register.

"What was going on back there?" Ziggy asked, holding up and inspecting some quality drumsticks.

"Nothing, just some dispute they were going through, now get over here so I can get this done." Wolfgang whistled as he wrote down an informal note. Ziggy dropped the drumsticks back in their place and went over to inspect the note. "So on the note is the stuff you want to sell and what time you should bring it. I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt and allowing you to bring in the stuff a week from today."

"You want me to bring 'em all in tomorrow?"

"I don't care if you bring it in the day after tomorrow, just bring the stuff in before the deadline," Wolfgang then lifted a sack of bits on the counter, "And don't spend this all in one place."

"... Was that under the counter the whole time?"

"No, I'm a fucking Unicorn in disguise, now lets go so I can lay in my bed." Wolfgang jumped over the counter and began to walk out of the building. Before he opened the door, Ziggy put a hand on his shoulder, making look back to his friend.

"You sure you don't want to play on some instruments WolfDren? It could be good for you." Ziggy asked with concern. Wolfgang frowned, the Zebmaican knew of his infatuation with music, once going on a drunken ramble on the intricacies of electric guitars and bass guitars. Ziggy most certainly cared for his friend, finding some unique charm within his gruff demeanor. Getting him to do something enjoyable to Zigg's would at least be a personal accomplishment if anything.

"Not today Zigg's, my fingers are cramped from the piano, but thanks... Really." Wolfgang gave a curt smile and left the store. He raised his hand to signify "Goodbye" to Ziggy, who also left the store to head back to his house.

Wolfgang stumbled in the streets looking miserable. He was thinking back to his time on Earth again, which lead him to drink the rest of the alcohol in his flask. Wobbling from side to side, wandering aimlessly, Wolfgang began to sing to himself.

"♪ I ain't happy
I'm feeling glad
I got sunshine in a bag
I'm useless but not for long
the future is coming on ♪"

With his vision starting to fade, Wolfgang dropped on the ground. He barely kept consciousness as he slowly drifted into sleep.

"♪ I'm useless... But not for long... My f-future... Is comin... ♪"