Horrors of Sugar Cube Corner, Vol.1

Horrors of Sugar Cube Corner

-Vol. 1-

Ch.3- Dinner for Two

The Galloping Green is one of the classier restaurants in Ponyville. The restaurant certainly threw around its title as the premiere place to eat, serving extravagant meals to only the wealthiest of ponies that could afford it. On special occasions (and for a staggering price), the restaurant will clear the whole place out and allow a few ponies to dine by themselves and will cook whatever they want.

Pinkamina Diane Pie was once again in uncharted waters. She had never been to such an upscale restaurant before and felt uncomfortable wearing her fancy black dress. She would much rather wear her Berry Punch sweatshirt over the slim number that acquired from Rarity a scant few hours ago. Unfortunately “rules are rules” as Pokey Pierce said in regard to her dress code. With a begrudging sigh she crossed the threshold into the restaurant and was greeted by an overly perky hostess, Bright Eyes (Number 56). She was a simple looking pony, with a white coat and a brown mane dressed in a formal evening gown. Her blue eyes sparkled, even within the dim lighting of the restaurant. If it wasn’t for the existing circumstances, Pinkie would have popped those eyes out of her skull and started ripping out teeth.

“Hi there! You must be Mr. Pierce’s dinner guest for the evening. If you’ll follow me, I’ll take you to your table”, said the perky hostess with an overly jubilant smile. The restaurant’s décor was certainly impressive. The walls were lined with exquisite marble pillars that supported a fresco painted ceiling. The fresco featured Celestia and Luna as they oversee Equestria.Beneath her hoves lie the softest carpet she had ever walked upon. Tying the room together was a small string band playing soft music. If Pinkie were a more emotional pony, she might’ve felt such awe in the display around her. A single table was in the center of the large dining room, with a dark blue unicorn with a white mane seated at it.

“Oh good you came”, Pokey exclaimed, “I was afraid for a second that you wouldn’t show”.

“Like I was given any choice”, the Pinkamina retorted, moving her hair out of her eye as she sat down across the table from Pokey. With a motion of his hoof, Pokey signaled for a waiter to come over and take their orders.

“Good evening monsieur and mademoiselle, what are we having for tonight”, inquired the stuck up waiter in an obviously fake French accent.

Pokey responded quickly, “Yes, to drink, a fine Château la philtre d'amour. To eat, the lovely lady will have the seared pony flank, topped with bacon and sautéed vegetable. As for myself, I will have the liver, cooked medium, with a light peppercorn sauce. Also, a small plate of pegasus wings to split between the two of us. And for dessert, I think we’d both enjoy a slice of Angel Bunny cake”. With a “Very good sir”, the waiter trotted off to the kitchen with their order. A few moments later, the waiter returned with a chilled bottle of the wine Pokey requested. “

As the wine was being poured, Pokey stated boldly,“You’re going to just love this vintage. It’s a ’72 Chardonnay with a touch of A-positive; very playful with one’s palette”. Pinkamina didn’t touch her wine. From her own experience, the best way to capture a pony was to slip them something in their food or drink. The last thing she wanted was to have here night end with a very intense one time session of role reversal. After a few minutes of silence, Pokey Pierce spoke.

“The wine isn’t drugged by the way”, he said swirling his glass. She hesitantly brought the glass up to her lips and poured the dark red liquid down her throat. To her surprise, it was actually quite good. The blood mixed in with the wine really did bring out its flavor.

“See? I’m not that bad of a guy after all”, remarked the blue stallion. Food was swiftly delivered to their table. The spread looked heavenly. Each morsel of food seemed to be bursting with flavor, giving off an intoxicating aroma. With all the plates set on the table, the two ponies anxiously dug into their meal. The cooks did not disappoint. Pinkamina’s first bite was spectacular, as her cut of meat practically melted in her mouth. The two released a simultaneous “mmmm” as they took consumed their first bites.

“So…are you going to tell me why you’ve decided to bring me out here with you”, Pinkie inquired in between bites of her food.

“Simple”, Pokey Pierce said calmly, “We are not like the other ponies Pinkamina. We are more evolved. We eat meat, we cannibalize our own kind. We enjoy murder, because we understand in those sweet few minutes between excruciating pain and death, there is pure bliss--”. As Pokey blathers on, Pinkie slowly moves her hoof down from the table and onto her lap. She slowly pulls her dress up and places her hoof on the knife that was secretly strapped to her leg. Her mind was running scenarios on her best course of action. The most logical would be to slip Pokie’s annoying throat, use the two dinner knives and quickly assassinate the wait staff, eviscerate the band, move on to the kitchen and massacre all inside, and then finally torch the place to destroy any traces of evidence. Suddenly she felt another hoof on her leg. Pokey Pierce rubbed it gently and gave an evil grin.

“I apologize for boring you. I’ve been told that I tend to ramble. Anyway, what I seem to be getting at is…I think you’re a nice pony and I thought I’d take you on a date to get better acquainted with you”, said Pierce innocently. Pinkamina brushed his hoof of quickly and gave a sharp, “This is not a date”, to here malevolent dinner companion. She was about to add a string of colorful insults to her dialogue with Pokey Pierce, but was interrupted by the dessert cart’s arrival. Though the cake was just as delicious as the other food that was served, Pinkie paid no attention to it. All she could do was watch her enemy eat and hope he didn’t try anything before their time was up. After what seemed like hours, Pokey Pierce effortlessly used his unicorn magic to levitate his napkin and gently dab his lips.

“Oh no, it seems you have barely touched your cake. Well, I suppose with a fine meal like that no pony would really have room for such treats in the first place. Shall I have the waiter wrap it up for you”, inquired Pokey. Pinkie merely grunted. Her tolerance for his presence was reaching its maximum. With a small giggle Pokey motioned for a to-go box as he removed himself from his chair.

After giving a small bow he said, “Thank you for the lovely evening Miss Pinkamina. I had a lovely time and do so hope we can meet again. I’ll be seeing you”. He turned and slowly made his way towards the restaurant’s exit. This was Pinkamina’s only chance to end this silliness. Lightning fast, she made for her knife.

Panic sets in. What should be the familiar touch of cold steel was replaced with the soft, tender touch of her own flank. Pokey released a loud burst of laughter and waved her knife behind his back with his magic.

“Don’t worry, I won’t make this one count against you dear”, he yelled, half laughing as he left the restaurant.

Ch.4-Stress Relief
Deep within the confines of Ponyville’s bakery, a wet splat echoed throughout Sugar Cube’s basement followed by an unbearable scream. Bright Eyes, the hostess of The Galloping Green, was being used as a living target for Pinkie’s throwing knife collection. She was in a great deal of pain as three knives were embedded in her abdomen, and two were in her arms and legs respectively. She attempted to release a word and reason with the pink pony, but was cut off by another knife, this time to her left flank. Another shriek erupted from her throat. Pinkamina, now bored with the knives, slowly trotted over to the bleeding pony. Tears streamed down Bright Eyes’. She tried to be brave and show her captor that the pain meant nothing to her and that she was a tough pony. Unfortunately, her trembling didn’t help her cause. Pinkamina rubbed her face with a hoof, wiping away Bright’s present tears.

“Shhh”, she said softly, “You’re much too pretty to cry…Why don’t we fix that”. Pinkamina started to deliver blow after blow to Bright’s face. Each punch felt like an oncoming train. The beating continued for almost five minutes. Bright Eyes’ face now resembled something akin to hamburger meat. Out of breath, Pinkie signaled for Scootaloo to finish the job.

“Golly you sure do look tired. Want something to help”, asked the orange pony. Bright Eyes didn’t say anything. With an inquisitive ear, Scootaloo leaned in to listen for a heartbeat or any other sign of life. A very faint heart beat was heard after an anxious little amount of waiting. Scootaloo produced a taser from behind her back and delivered a quick zap to the captive pony. Bright Eyes responded with a shriek and then labored breathing.

“Oh good you’re still alive. For a second I thought Miss Pinkamina was too rough on you”, said Scootaloo with a big grin. As Pinkie watched on, she realized she had been rather too rough with some of her more recent patients. Ever since her dinner with Pokey Pierce, she’s been a little on edge as of late. In fact, after that night, Pokey was the only thing she could think about. When she drew Bright Eyes’ number, she had hoped for at least some information about her admiring pony.

“Scoots, I’m going to go up and get some fresh air. You can finish up our play time with our guest”, said Pinkie. With an “Okie dokie loki” Scootaloo then produced a hack saw and began cutting off one of Bright Eyes’ legs.

“It’s for our dog”, Scoots said. “She really likes leg bones”. Bright Eyes’ screams filled the room as Pinkie exited the torture chamber. Upstairs Pinkie went to the kitchen and washed the caked blood off of her hooves. She had always enjoyed her work in the past, but lately something has felt missing. “All of this is that damn unicorn’s doing,” she thought angrily. With a small yawn and a glance at one of the clocks in the kitchen, she figured it was time to go to bed. After a quick shower and brushing her long pink mane, she made her way to her bedroom. To her surprise, the little pegasus was already under the covers sleeping. Though Scootaloo was good at what she did, she was never that fast. Suspiciously Pinkie flipped over the covers. Under them were a dozen roses with a card that read “With love From: Pokey”. She tossed the flowers out of the room angrily, muttering curses under her breath. She hopped into bed and prayed that that bastard’s number came up next.

***

The day was finally upon her, as another number drawing was at hand. She quickly jumped out of bed and rushed to her computer, waking up Scootaloo in the process. Scootaloo was always happy to have a new pony to kill, but seeing Miss Pinkamina act in such a way has worried the little filly. For weeks Pinkie has been springing up every number drawing day like a child on Hearth’s Warming Day, gleefully started up the number generator program.

Numbers sporadically flashed on the screen. She twitched whenever a digit in Pokey’s number would pop up. The numbers began to slow down. Pinkie began to sweat and nervously rubbed her hooves together. The numbers fell into place, one after the other, followed by an electronic beep. The screen displayed “Number 111” in big bold font.

“yes…YES”, she shouted triumphantly, cackling with laughter. She picked up Scootaloo and gave her a big, spine crushing hug. Scoots embraced her mentor, glad that the craziness would soon be over and things would be back to normal.

Several hours later nightfall came, and with it Pinkamina’s bloodlust. Taking nothing to chance she put on her old sneaky suit that was hanging in the closet and equipped over a dozen of her sharpest knives. She quickly exited the bakery and made for Pokey Pierce’s house. She trotted hastily down the winding cobblestone streets, looking over her shoulder every few seconds to make sure no ponies were following her. After several tense minutes, she finally reached Pokey Pierce’s residence. To her concern, the door was wide open. She knew that several ponies in town were dumb enough to leave their doors and windows unlocked, but Pokey would certainly never be so careless.

The interior to the house was surprisingly normal. Not much furniture besides a small couch and a television set, but otherwise the home of a law abiding citizen. The house was small, having only a few rooms in the one story dwelling. Nothing registered on her Pinkie sense. Like a shadow, she stealthily crawled through the dark living area towards the bedroom. Shallow breathing could be heard down the small hallway connecting the two areas. Pinkamina gently taps Pokey’s bedroom door with a hoof, lightly pushing it open.

Curled up in soft bed sheets lay Pokey Pierce, her nemesis, sleeping comfortably. She silently draws a knife from her sneaky suit and slowly approaches her sleeping victim. One quick swipe and all of Pinkie’s troubles will disappear. Her hoof shakes. She hesitates. Why is this so difficult for her? Gazing on his face through the soft moonlight, she feels strange. She hovers over him for another few minutes. A feeling similar to what she’s experiencing now is when she is with Scootaloo. It’s similar but somehow…more uncontrollable. Time was of the essence and she had to make an important decision: kill him or leave empty hooved.

She blends back into the night and disappears from the quiet house. To her chagrin, she leaves without a body.