Humbugs

by ValenceBond

Rating: everyone
Tags: Changelings, Original Character, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Human
Length: 2074

In a world where humans and ponies coexist, two brothers try to stay warm during the holidays.

It's been a while since Earth and Equestria first made contact. Now both worlds have trans-dimensional residents. This includes a pair of brothers trying to stay warm during the holidays. They've taken up caroling, though they aren't exactly clear on the finer points of it...

Published 2016-12-19 05:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-01-05 09:27:52 UTC

Caro-ling

The owner of this house had salted their walkway, making walking up to the door easier. Buzz adjusted his scarf as he stood on the concrete porch. It was nearing sunset, and the wind was picking up; almost fast enough to start whistling through his leg holes. The sounds of laughter and music came from the other side of the door. “Ready, Pollie?”

Next to him, a pair of green eyes looked up from under a bundle of booties, jackets, and a big red festive hat. “Can we get some donuts? I thought we were going to get some donuts?”

Buzz wrapped a leg around Rollie Pollie and pulled him in for a hug. “We just need to get a little more money for rent. Anything extra we get will go straight for donuts, alright?”

Pollie nodded. “Okay. Which song are we starting with?” Pollie’s voice contained an edge of nervousness, which was reflected in the link they shared.

Buzz fed a shred of his own strained confidence back to his brother. “ ‘Deck the Halls,’ I think that is one that everyone likes.” Pollie nodded and took his spot next to Buzz, as Buzz rung the doorbell.

The sounds of the party inside died down a little as a pair of footsteps approached. A short man answered the door wearing a sweater with some pegasus dressed up as a red-nosed reindeer. Before the man could say a word, the duo broke out into song, led by Buzz. “Deck the halls with bells of holly.”

“Falalalalalaa la la” added Pollie.

“‘Tis the season to be jolly,” continued Buzz.

“Falala la la—” Pollie took his hat off with his magic and held it up to the man.

The man interrupted the two. “Didn’t you guys see the other carolers going around?”

The song died in Buzz’s throat. “What?”

“Falalala la la la… la?” Pollie finally caught on. The man pointed down the street and sure enough there was a group of around half a dozen ponies and humans a few doors down, singing much louder, clearer, and in tune. They also had a small box for the charity, which jangled with all the festiveness of a belt of silver bells.

“Hey Rick, who’s at the door?” asked a voice from inside. A teal unicorn poked her head out from down the hall. Waves of apprehension and pity rolled off of her. “Oh… beggars?”

Buzz bit back a pointed comment before simply responding. “No, we’re carolers.”

As if he didn't hear Buzz, Rick turned back. “Don’t worry about it, Cloud, I got this. Just go back and get yourself some more food.” Before Buzz could protest any further, the man pulled out a bill and put it in Pollie’s hat. “Here you go. You might want to head over to the next block before the other group does.” He started to close the door. “Merry Christmas, stay warm.”

“Merry Christmas!” Pollie parroted.

Buzz gave the man a half hearted wave with a hoof. “Happy Holidays to you, too…”

The door shut with a click, and the siblings were left standing in the cold again. The laughter picked up again, the love and companionship practically seeping through the thick wooden door. It was enough to take the edge off their hunger. They stayed there for a few moments before they turned around and walked back to the sidewalk. Pollie pulled the bill out of his hat and held it up to Buzz on a hoof. “Ten dollars! That’s a lot! I bet we can buy donuts now.”

Buzz put on a smile for his brother, though internally he winced. No, that money would to go towards rent with the local hive. He was careful to keep that thought to himself. “We have even got some compassion from him too. Not bad, if I say so myself.” He reached to take the bill from his brother, but a gust of wind caught it. Buzz chirped in panic, and ran after the bill. Stiff wings buzzed as he jumped into the air and grabbed it in his mouth before landing in a pile of plowed snow.

Pollie half-ran, half-waddled over to him. “Are you okay?”

Buzz pulled himself out of the snow, bill in his mouth, and shook the snow off, thankful for once he had chitin. He sent Pollie a line of calm. “Yeah I’m okay.” Buzz opened the wallet hidden under his scarf and slid the bill inside, adding to the thick wad next to their ID papers, mentally tallying up their haul. “Almost made rent.” He closed the wallet and tucked it back into its hiding spot. “C’mon now, we should keep moving.” They walked down the rest of the block, passing the other group of carolers with a polite, “Happy Holidays.”

As they stood at the crosswalk, waiting for the light to change, a deep rumble sounded out from both of them. Pollie tugged on his scarf. “I’m hungry…”

“I know, Pollie, I am too.”

“Can we get a donut or something?”

Buzz gave him a sideways glance. He picked the bitter parts out of the unicorn’s pity and fed the sweeter compassion directly to Pollie. “I dunno, we should save up more cash before we start spending it.”

“But you said that we almost made rent?” Buzz could feel the edge of tiredness in Pollie’s voice.

Buzz sighed. They’d been walking all day and Pollie had been dragged all over the city with him. He realized they’d worked straight through lunch, and dinner was soon approaching. “Alright then, I think we can take a break. Let’s go find a place to get you a donut, you little pill bug.” Buzz lightly slapped his wing on Pollie’s side and smiled at the look of mock anger that he got back.

Pollie stuck out his tongue and lightly kicked with a foreleg, which Buzz returned in kind. Pollie giggled and leaned against his brother’s side, wings buzzing under his jacket. “Thank you.”

Buzz smiled. “No problem.” They sat there for a few moments until the light changed. “The light’s turned, stay close.”

Author's Note

Whelp, this was banged out in about two weeks, but I do have more planned eventually. Just going to have to wait a little while, unfortunately. I have to thank Cross Lament for helping do a quick proof-read of this chapter though.

Edit (1/5/2017)
Did a few more minor edits with the help of Damaged

Almost Milk and Cookies

The bell on the door rung as the two entered the donut shop. A bored student looked up from her cell phone and gave them a wave. “Welcome, what can I get’cha?”

“Remember, we’re on a budget, Pollie,” reminded Buzz. Rollie Pollie wasted no time in running over to the display and pressing his face against the display’s glass. He took only a moment before he rattled off his order while pointing at each and every item with his hoof. “I’ll have a fritter. No, wait, that thing right there looks good! I’m going to have that instead...”

Buzz winced as the cashier entered the prices into the register, cutting more and more into their budget. When Pollie’s order was finally done, over half of their recent gain was gone. The cashier turned to Buzz. “Alright sir, what do you want?”

“I’ll, uh… just get some hot coffee please.” Just shy of ten dollars.

Pollie tugged on Buzz’s scarf. “Aren’t you going to get something to eat too?”

Buzz looked at Pollie and then back to the cashier. “And one of the plain glazed donuts.” With that, the total went just over ten dollars. Buzz sighed and paid the tab. “There goes the last street,” he mumbled. He took the tray from the cashier with his magic, earning a burst of amazement from the woman. He looked the tray over and spotted a bottle of milk. He looked at his receipt. “Excuse me, we didn’t order milk.” His horn lit up to pass the milk back but the cashier held up her hand.

“It’s on the house. I wouldn’t want to be out there myself right now with just a scarf,” the cashier pointed to the snow falling outside. Work was getting off for most, and crowds were forming. Sure enough, it seemed that Buzz was the lightest dressed. Even the ponies wore at least a hat and scarf. “And your cousin’s so cute I couldn't help but spoil him a little.” She leaned over the counter, finger extended.

“He’s my brother!” Pollie announced. Still, he craned his neck and met the finger halfway with his snout. “Boop,” he said, with a giggle.

Buzz watched as his brother got a decent meal of adoration from the woman. He had to clamp their bond closed for a moment to block more than a little jealousy towards his brother, and then some self loathing for feeling it. Buzz gently nudged his brother. “What do we say, Pollie?”

Pollie nodded. “Thank you for the milk, Miss,” he squinted to read her nametag, “Claire!”

Claire’s smile grew bigger. “You’re welcome.”

Buzz placed the food tray on a table. “Come on now, let’s get some food in you.”

Pollie was loathe to pull himself away from the flow of emotion but at the same time the donuts called to him. Buzz helped him out of the numerous layers of clothing Buzz had insisted Pollie wear. Pollie pushed his clothes aside as he slid into the spartan particleboard booth. He bounced in his seat as he tried to use his teeth to get the cap off the bottle of milk.

“Here, let me get that for you.” With a quick glow of his horn, Buzz took the cap off and poured it into a coffee cup. “Careful, don’t spill it.”

A small edge of wonder joined Claire’s flow of warm fuzzies. “So, what brings you guys out here?” she asked.

Buzz got into the booth across from Pollie. “We’re just carolling. This is Pollie’s first winter here on Earth, and he’s always wanted to celebrate Christmas.”

Claire nodded. “It’s not for a few more days, but that’s a good start I guess. Do you usually celebrate Heartswarming instead?”

“Hearthswarming,” Buzz said, “And no, changelings usually don't celebrate that. Not really our thing.” ‘Except when we were playing a part,’ he thought.

Claire reached under the counter. “Well, if you want to do something really traditional,” she pulled out a flier and held it up, “you can’t go wrong with ‘A Christmas Carol’. The community college puts it on every year. There’s a performance tonight if you want to go.”

Buzz took the flier with his magic to read. Buzz didn't need to feel the excitement coming off of Pollie, a glance at his face was enough to tell him that they were going to see a play tonight. “How much?” he asked.

Claire grinned. “It’s like ten bucks or so. It is community college theater after all.”

“How about that, Pollie? You want to go?” Pollie nodded and Buzz smiled back. “Alright then, we’ll go after you finished your food.”

With that, Pollie shoved the rest of his bear claw into his mouth, much to his brother’s surprise before washing it down with his milk. “Come on, let’s go!” He hurriedly tried to put his clothes back on, but only succeeded in getting himself tangled up. Buzz got out of his seat and walked over to Pollie’s side, helping him out of his bind. The moment he was able to walk again, he practically ran over to the door, pacing back and forth as Buzz took his coffee and donut in his magic. “Thank you miss Claire! Merry Christmas,” Pollie shouted, before he pushed open the door and left, followed by Buzz.

Buzz paused in the door and turned back to Claire. “Thanks again. You don’t know how much this means to him.”

Claire gave him a wave. “No problem. Stay warm. Happy Holidays.”

“Happy Holidays,” Buzz waved back before turning to leave. “Pollie, slow down, we’ve got time before it starts.”

Author's Note

What's this? A second chapter to a story of mine? It's true! Anywho sorry this didnt come out in time for the actual holidays. Unless you go by the Russian Chrismas date. IN that case I'm 2 days early!

Anywho, thanks again to Damaged for helping proofread this.