Romancing the Pone
Twilight's Castle
Previous ChapterNext ChapterSpike sat at a desk writing on documents and scrolls containing his work assignments for the week, such was the life of the Princess of Friendship's Number One Assistant.
Twilight Sparkle, Starlight Glimmer, and Rarity were discussing financial solutions to Rarity's businesses inside the Castle Library.
His mood was sour, since Rarity didn't show any more interest in him from yesterday; only asking for Spike to bring their group snacks, drinks, books, spare parchment, or anything else they would need.
'It's alright,' he told himself. 'Rarity's got a lot to deal with, and she knows I'll be there for her.'
He mostly kept to himself, while the conversation grew a little more heated.
Rarity waved her hoof in refusal. "Darling, I'm fine, you don't have to do this for my sake."
"Rarity, please take the money, if anything, you can think of it as free Bits." Twilight pleaded.
Rarity tightened her lips. "No, I pride myself on never having to lean on the Crown to support myself, and I don't want to start now. Not until I've exhausted every resource at my disposal first." She added.
Twilight sighed in frustration "I don't understand why you won't let me do this for you; you're always so generous towards me and everypony around you, why won't you let me help you." She finished sadly. "Are you mad at me?" She asked.
"Darling, no!" Rarity gasped in worry, realizing her refusal was coming off as ire toward her best friend. "I told you before, I'm not angry with you or Starlight for the accident," She reassured. "It's just that..." She trailed.
"Just what?" Twilight questioned in concern. "Please, I want to understand."
Rarity sighed. "Okay, I've never liked talking about this, since its a personal family matter..."
Twilight leaned in support.
Starlight Glimmer's attention rose along with Spike's as they listened to Rarity's confession.
"You know my parents were not very well off when I was growing up as an only foal before Sweetie Belle was born," Rarity started, getting an understanding nod from the others.
Spike nodded too, even if he wasn't included in the conversation.
"We were in such dire straights in those days, mother and father struggled to keep food on the table during the Apple Blight Famine; Dragon raids were rampant, we lost our home..." Rarity paused to compose herself, remembering the struggle of her youth. "If it weren't for the Crown's aid, providing free food, shelter, and Bits to help us; I'm not sure our family would've survived, or at least stayed here in Ponyville.
"Since that day, I made a vow to pay back all the generosity that was shown to us; I swore that my family would never know hunger, or face destitution ever again. That's why it's hard for me to accept Bits from your own Royal Coffers, Twilight." Rarity looked away. "I promised, I'd never take anything for myself that I haven't earned."
Twilight looked at the ground. "I think I understand, Rarity; you don't want to feel helpless like in your past... but will you make me a promise, at least?"
Rarity nodded.
"Will you be generous towards yourself?" She asked.
Rarity looked away and smiled in embarrassment. Knowing she got her there.
Twilight continued. "You still have a bad habit of giving more to others, than what you give to yourself." She smiled. "You're my best friend, Rarity, I'd do anything for you."
Rarity teared up, but kept her composure. "I appreciate it, really I do; just don't let the others hear you say that, or else they might get jealous." She shared a laugh with Twilight.
"They're all my best friends too, I don't see why I can't have more than one." She smiled at Starlight Glimmer, letting her know she was included in that group.
Rarity smiled and thought a moment. "Okay, I promise if things don't work out, I'll accept a loan from the Crown, that I'll pay back, with no less than three-percent interest per moon." She stated.
Twilight scoffed a laugh, knowing that was the best deal she'd ever work out with the businessmare.
Starlight Glimmer leaned forward. "Is there anything we can do for you in the meantime? I can probably work my magic to help sew new dresses for you. Pinkie Pie can vouch for my speed and quality," she offered. "I mean, that was a cake; but a dress shouldn't be much different." She added with a confident shrug.
Rarity thought for a moment. 'Starlight has a powerful talent for magic, but she doesn't have anywhere near the skill for fine precision as I do. Hiring her would affect the standard of quality I've set for my brand. And for my plans to work, I'm going to need the best seamstresses to help me... But maybe there's a way I could still accept her help.'
Rarity didn't want to be difficult towards her friends, and there was nothing material she couldn't obtain for herself.
And she had a stallion to care for now.
She remembered Atchmon being disappointed in her lack of magical abilities, and yet so intrigued with her meager talent. She felt bad for not being more skilled, but he was very understanding when she'd explain the complexities of thaumatology.
Without his knowledge and training in the wildernes, Rarity couldn't be sure she'd have survived on her own.
She didn't want to be put in that situation ever again.
It was her duty as both a mare and host to care for him as both a stallion and guest. Plus, she felt indebted to him. And she wanted to pay back that balance in full.
"Well... there is one thing you both could do for me," Rarity started.
"Anything," said Twilight.
"Just name it and we'll do it," said Starlight Glimmer.
Rarity gathered her resolve to commit to her new goals. "I want you both to train me in magic." She requested.
Both magic-talented mares balked.
Twilight spoke first. "Magic isn't something you can just 'train' yourself in; it takes years of study and practice; not to mention all the formulas, theories, and equations you need to memorize, and that's just for the intermediate spells." She explained.
Starlight Glimmer tapped her chin in thought. "Not really, Magic isn't an exact science; well, maybe it is to you, Twilight," she corrected, gaining the stink-eye from her mentor. "What I'm trying to say is, Sunburst was always great with Magical Theory, Laws, and all that stuff, whereas I've always excelled in practice, since I learn better by doing, anyway; so maybe we can teach her a few things." She finished in suggestion.
"Are you sure, Rarity?" Asked Twilight.
"I'm sure," Rarity started with confidence. "I've put this off for far too long, it's time I learned real magic like a proper Unicorn."
Twilight wasn't convinced she was telling her everything. "Please don't take this the wrong way, but does this have something to do with Atchmon?"
Rarity clammed up, and looked away. "I was afraid you'd ask that," she faced them with conviction. "But I assure you, I'm doing this more for my sake; plus it'll help me accomplish fashion line of my dreams, I've imagined since I was just a little filly, starting out on a sewing machine." She added wistfully.
Twilight nodded with a smile. "Okay, I'll come up with some primers for you to practice on."
"Thank you." Rarity smiled gratefully.
Fluttershy came through the open library door at a prancing-gallop, "Girls, guess who I ran into just outside my-" she paused and skid to a halt on her rump; remembering herself as her friend's attention were all directed at her. "I'm sorry, was I interrupting?" She looked away.
Rarity shot her a bright smile. "Fluttershy, darling, you're just the pony I needed to see; and no you're not interrupting anything, darling," Rarity said as she got out of her seat, trotted over and gave Fluttershy a welcoming hug and a kiss on each cheek.
"You needed to see me; for what?" Fluttershy asked curiously.
"I was hoping you'd be willing to do a big favor for me, if you're not busy?" She asked sweetly, putting on her charm.
"Sure, what would you like me to do?" Fluttershy said brightly.
"I was hoping you wouldn't mind visiting Atchmon at my house while I'm out running errands today?" Rarity asked.
"Oh, he's-" Fluttershy started, before being interrupted.
Rarity continued, flourishing her speech dramatically. "It's just that I'm worried about him being left all alone, being the lone lonely loner that he is,"
"That's a lot of alone-ness," Starlight Glimmer whispered through her teeth at Twilight, who nodded in agreement.
"Actually he-"
Rarity daintily placed a hoof against her forehead. "I knew he didn't want me leaving the house, but alas my work must come first; and all I can think about is him sulking in some depressing dark corner of my home," she hugged herself, as if she couldn't take the pain in her heart.
"I wouldn't say that-"
Rarity rushed in and held Fluttershy at hoof-length. "And now I must ask you, Fluttershy, to look after him in my stead," Rarity lowered her head and placed a hoof on her chest, like she was ending the scene of a play, oozing morose.
Fluttershy was silent for a long moment, making sure Rarity wasn't going to continue her dramatic request. "Um... no." She answered simply.
Rarity looked heartbroken. "What, b- but why?!" She whimpered.
Fluttershy turned so she wasn't blocking the doorway. "Because he's right here." She revealed cheerfully with Atchmon standing behind her in the threshold of the door.
Atchmon flashed the group a toothy, innocent smile, after hearing Rarity talk about him.
"Atchmon!" Rarity gasped in surprise, and cantered up to him. "You're here, you're out, I- I thought it would be too stressful for you to leave the house?" She questioned in concern.
Atchmon rolled his shoulders in a shrug. "A lil' bit, but I'm makin' it alright." He reassured her, but hid his frown, knowing she thought so low of him. 'It's just because of how I acted last night.' He reminded himself. 'And she's right too.'
Twilight Sparkle came up to him with the others lagging behind; Fluttershy opted to stay where she was, along with Spike, who didn't bother to move or greet him at all; instead he folded his arms over his chest, looking displeased.
"It's good to see you again, Atchmon," Twilight Sparkle greeted. "Are you adjusting well to Equestrian society?" She asked while floating a notebook and pen as if ready to take notes. "Any feelings of dysmorphia, or conflicting thoughts you'd like to share?"
Starlight Glimmer promptly knocked the stationary out of Twilight's telekinetic grip. To which her mentor put on a wounded expression.
"It's pretty different, but also kinda familiar too," he answered with an awkward chuckle.
The others nodded their heads in understanding, and waited for him to say something more, but the tension in the air was palpable.
He wanted to apologize for his behavior of last night to the group. But as Atchmon gazed across the room at those gathered, his discomfort grew.
"H-ick-" His breath hitched as he failed to utter an apology.
His eyes darted between the dragon's scowl, to the three Unicorn's gazes ranging from interested, to concerned and wary, and lastly to Fluttershy's avoidant looks. His lungs felt like they were constricting, preventing him from speaking further. A pressure in his mind formed as the weight of anxiety stalled his thoughts.
He wanted to apologize, but the fear of embarrassing himself in front of Rarity again cemented itself as an impassable obstacle.
The others listened expectantly after seeing Atchmon about to continue, but the awkwardness grew as his silence dragged on.
Starlight Glimmer blurted to save the conversation. "Buh-I guess you'd actually have to be from there to really 'get it', huh?" She suggested.
"Y-yeah," Atchmon chuckled nervously, keeping his eyes averted from the group, and mentally berating himself for messing up again.
Twilight Sparkle cleared her throat. "Spike, would you take Atchmon around the castle, I need to speak with the girls for a bit; you boys can hang out until we're done, right?"
Rarity looked confused.
Spike's attention rose at the request, and darted his eyes between the stallion and the others. "Sure..?" He said slowly, and gathered his things; then walked passed Atchmon, before turning to address him. "Come on..." He groaned like a teenager, who'd been told to do a chore they didn't want to do, and gestured the way with a nod of his head.
Atchmon did a double take between the drake and the Princess, before turning to follow, then looked back at Rarity for reassurance.
"Go on, darling, we'll be with you again shortly," Rarity assured him.
That was good enough for Atchmon, and he followed Spike outside the library, while Twilight shut the door behind them with her magic.
Soon as the door clicked shut, Rarity whirled on the others. "Why on Earth would you do that for?" She asked, sounding betrayed, but keeping her voice low so the boys couldn't hear her through the door.
Twilight Sparkle lowered her head. "I'm sorry Rarity, but I wanted to ask you some things while Fluttershy is here."
Fluttershy flinched as all her friend's attention was brought on her again. "W-what do you need me for?" She asked in confusion.
"I mostly want you here as moral and emotional support for Rarity." Twilight explained. "That is, if she's comfortable with answering some of the more personal questions I have."
Rarity pursed her lips in thought, before giving the pair a nod. She wasn't a paragon of Honesty like Applejack, but she trusted them both with her most personal secrets. And she wanted to reveal a secret or two about herself and Atchmon. If for nothing but to gauge their reactions, and maybe even seek their approval.
"Rarity," Twilight started as she braced herself for the question to come. "Are you okay, if I ask you a few personal questions about you and Atchmon?"
'I see, I figured this would be about him,' she thought. 'I knew there'd be some concern from the others about my decision to let him live with me.' Rarity put on an innocent smile, and spoke cheerfully. "Not at all, dear; you know I'll always be open and honest with you."
Twilight matched her with a sympathetic smile. "Thank you, and if you aren't comfortable with answering, then just let me know and I won't press it further." She informed. "I'm just concerned about some of the decisions you've made, since you've been back."
Rarity nodded her head in understanding and waited expectantly for the questions to come.
Starlight Glimmer looked apprehensive between them and began making her exit. "It sounds like you two have something serious to discuss, so... I'm gonna go and catch up with the boys while you three talk it out." She said as she anxiously slunk towards the door, wanting to make a quick escape...
Until Pinkie Pie suddenly burst through the door, followed by Rainbow Dash hovering in the air behind her, comically smacking Starlight in the face, leaving her seeing stars.
Pinkie didn't notice, and rushed in with a trolley full of baked goods. "I need you all to stop what you're doing and eat these; oh, and stay away from opening doors!" She gathered a bunch of sweet treats in a hoof and held them against her chest, a couple fell to the ground in crumbles as she rushed around the library in a pink-blur to stuff all her friend's faces.
Starlight Glimmer stumbled away in a daze until she suddenly had a muffin stuffed in her mouth backwards, sucking on the paper end of the pastry.
Rarity looked cross-eyed at the muffin stuffed in her mouth, before pulling it out with magic and giving it a nibble.
Fluttershy's missed it's mark when she flinched away as Pinkie zipped by; leaving sticky crumbs on her cheek as it bounced harmlessly to the ground.
Twilight Sparkle conjured a shield in time, watching as the smushed breading slid down the curve of her fuchsia-colored barrier.
Starlight recovered from being dazed, then her attention rose after noticing something was stuffed into her mouth.
"This is a matter of public safety, everypony! I need you to tell me if these muffins are too good, or not!" She plunged her whole head into the basket, eating loudly, with some of the confections spilling over the edge.
Rainbow Dash swallowed hers in one gulp, after Pinkie Pie practically shoved one down her gullet, leaving her coughing up crumbs and teary-eyed. "Caff-caff-hack, Pinkie-eh-cough!" She rasped in complaint, before licking around her lips. "Mmm, not bad," she smacked thoughtfully, before crossing hooves and adding: "But I'm still mad!" She finished, looking cross with her. "This is what you needed my help?"
"Pinkie, we're trying to have a serious discussion here!" Twilight Sparkle scolded.
"About what?" Pinkie lifted her head out of the basket, with a dozen muffins stuffed in her mouth. She then swallowed them all effortlessly. "Ooh, is it about Rarity's new coltfriend?" She cooed teasingly.
That one word triggered Rarity. "He's not my coltfriend!" She shouted hysterically in a higher pitched tone.
Everypony looked at her in varying degrees of fear and skepticism, except for Pinkie who smiled knowingly, after her outburst.
Rarity cleared her throat. "He's a colt who happens to be my friend, and I know some of you may have concerns about him living with me; but I assure you, I am in my right mind when making such a decision." She directed most of her statement at Twilight, while the others shared looks with one another.
Starlight Glimmer quietly made her escape while the others weren't looking, but stopped short of closing the door. Deciding to eavesdrop on the conversation.
Twilight lowered her head. "I'm sorry things turned out like this Rarity, but I just needed to be sure you were okay."
Rarity puffed out her chest proudly. "I've never felt better in my life," then she looked away meekly. "But it would mean the world to me, if all of you approved of him."
"Are you planning to court him?" Fluttershy asked, much to everypony's surprise.
"No!" Rarity burst out again, realizing too late how that previous statement sounded. "I-I meant that as a friend, and as a guest in my home." She looked away guiltily. "I would have surely perished on my own, if it wasn't for his help."
Starlight Glimmer covered her gaping mouth. It was obvious to her what was going on.
The others exchanged looks again, while Rainbow Dash shrugged her hooves. "He seems like a pretty cool guy, we kinda do the same thing in the Wonderbolts, sleeping in the barracks; so I don't see a problem with it."
Starlight wanted to face-hoof herself. Of course Rainbow would be the most oblivious.
Pinkie piped. "Yeah, it's like having a sleepover that never ends, but with a dude-friend!"
"He seems very... nice." Fluttershy added her opinion, then flushed bashfully.
Twilight Sparkle chewed her lip in thought. "If you're okay with keeping him around, then I will be too; but I still want to speak with him myself soon."
Starlight Glimmer could tell her mentor was still in denial.
"Thank you all so very much," Rarity smiled graciously at all her friends. "I know you all haven't had much time to get to know him yourselves... and last night wasn't the best example; but I assure you, he really is quite the gentlestallion... when he wants to be." She added quietly at the end.
Rainbow Dash reassured her. "Hey, if you say he's cool, then he's cool to us too, right guys?"
The others nodded their heads and uttered their agreements, while Twilight seemed a bit reserved from the rest.
After waiting a few seconds, and sensing that the conversation was over, Starlight Glimmer knocked on the door to get the other's attention.
"Sounds like you're all finished up, want me to go get the boys?" She offered.
Twilight Sparkle looked around at the others to make sure they were done, before turning her attention back on Starlight. "Yes, would you bring Atchmon to the throne room, please Starlight, I think we all would like a word with him?" She asked while looking around at the others.
Rainbow Dash shrugged her forehooves. While Pinkie nodded energetically, while helping Fluttershy nod with her as well.
Rarity smiled and gave a single nod of her approval.
"Okay, be back in a bit!" Starlight Glimmer said cheerily, before leaving and closing the door behind her.
She hung her head in thought as she mulled over everything she heard and saw in there.
"Rarity's... in love.... with an alien!" She quietly mouthed off to herself, unable to believe her own words.
Now that Starlight was well and truly gone, Twilight turned her attention back on her friends.
She shook her head while thinking of Starlight Glimmer being still too anxious to make herself part of the discussion. That was a friendship lesson she'd have to assign for later.
Pinkie Pie slunk up next to Rarity and wrapped a hoof around her withers as she spoke conspiratorially. "So, little miss Rarity was all alone in the woods, with nothing but a stallion to keep her company; did you two do anything while you were away by your lonesome?" She teased.
Rarity's face turned a beat red as she spoke in a fluster. "M- I- mh- Miss Pie, I don't like what you are insinuating!"
"Pinkie!" Twilight admonished, then looked apologetic. "I'm sorry Rarity, this isn't how I wanted things to go."
"Oh my." Fluttershy squeaked while covering her face with hooves and wings.
"What? Do what?" Rainbow asked in confusion, after only half-listening.
Pinkie continued to tease. "Oh, so you definitely aren't together?" She hinted.
Rarity blurted and started to sound haughty with a hint of disgust. "No! And even if I did have relations with him--which I didn't--I would never debase myself by doing... activities before marriage!" Her ears laid back in regret after the lie.
Everpony went dead silent as they stared at her.
Pinkie was grinning mischievously as she approached Rarity. "So, you wouldn't care if he and I did some, hee-hee, activities together?" She giggled seductively in front of her.
Rarity felt as though her brain short-circuited. She couldn't think of anything else. All Rarity could see in her mind was Pinkie's grubby little hooves all over her stallion.
Twilight used her magic to drag Pinkie away from crowding Rarity. "Pinkie! I know it's that time of the year, but have some self-control, girl!"
Rainbow Dash complained. "Argh, it is?" She checked her backside. "Nope, nothing." She sighed in relief, then sniffed the air. "But it smells like somepony is... Fluttershy?"
Fluttershy stood quietly off to the side, silently hoping nopony will notice; but when they looked at her, she put on an embarrassed face and slowly hid behind a desk. "I'm sorry, it just started on my way over here." She whimpered.
Twilight Sparkle sighed. "I just realized I'm late; probably didn't get enough Sun since shutting myself inside all the time, while working on the spell to bring you home."
Rarity stated. "I'm late as well, darling; the Doctor said too much stress will delay it." She trotted over to reassure her.
Pinkie Pie stated proudly. "I'm not! My winky-pinky is on schedule, and on the prowl."
The others scoffed in varying degrees of disgust, which delighted Pinkie for getting a reaction out of them.
Rarity warned her. "You better not be planning on taking advantage of him."
"Of course not, silly; but I can't make any promises we won't do some activities together," she tittered. "Besides, didn't you say he's not your coltfriend, and you aren't together?" She cocked her head back and forth.
Rarity had to bite her tongue, before coming up with a more matured response. "Atchmon is a grown stallion, and he can choose for himself, whom he wishes to court." Her gut wrenched as she spoke, as if her words became a blade; and she just committed seppuku.
Twilight spoke up. "Alright everypony, that's enough; Rarity and I need some time to talk alone, so why don't you all wait for us in the Throne room."
The others did as she suggested, knowing Pinkie pushed their frienship, as she often does; but they knew it wasn't entirely her fault.
Twilight placed a hoof on Rarity's withers, and whispered. "You know she doesn't mean it, right? She's just acting like a tart because it's Estrus."
Rarity sniffed, but kept her dignity. "Oh Twilight, you're still so innocent, even after all these years we've known each other."
Twlight knitted her brow in confusion. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Darling, you've never been to one of Pinkie's, or her other friend's more... scandalous parties."
"And you have?" She asked incredulously.
"Yes, dear, I have," she took a breath. "It was just that one time in Canterlot."
Twilight shook her head. "I guess it only makes sense she would know where to find all the best party scenes, especially after seeing her meet my old friend, Minuette; I know she's got friends everywhere, but I never thought about just how wide her friend-network spans."
Rarity nodded in agreement. "After our first night at the Grand Galloping Gala, Pinkie offered to take me to 'a place full of hot studs who'd still give me the best night ever'; to quote her words."
Twilight tried to think back. "I vaguely remember her offering to take all of us somewhere, but I was so tired and full on donuts; all I wanted to do was sleep."
Rarity scoffed a laugh. "Yes the others were quite done with disappointments for the night; but with Pinkie being the 'party animal' she is; she wasn't about to throw in the towel until she had the party she was promised." Rarity sighed, remembering how the night went. "I went along with it, only because I was too angry and hurt with how badly things with Blueblood went; which kept me wide awake."
Twilight followed along. "So what happened, what was it like?"
Rarity had to cover her eyes, but the images of that night were seared into her mind. "Ugh, what didn't I see is more like it," she retched in disgust. "First was how Ponies were 'dancing', if you can call being mounted on the dance floor a 'dance'."
Twilight covered her mouth with a hoof. "You mean they were- in public!" She exasperated.
Rarity nodded. "Pinkie showed me how the stallions like to 'say hello'; in which I witnessed our Pinkie Pie be penetrated by no less than three strangers, before we even found a place to sit and have a drink!" She threw her hooves up. "I just couldn't believe she enjoyed being treated like some- some- receptacle for stallion seed."
Twilight, having read many dirty books, didn't bother to correct her on the proper terminology. "I've heard of those types of parties, but I just never imagined any of us going to them."
"Indeed," Rarity sighed. "I left the moment some dredge tried to seduce me by offering a drink made of his 'essence'." She shivered in disgust.
"I get that you're saying Pinkie will follow through on her words, but I think you missed something there." Twilight informed.
"Like what?" She asked.
"She was asking you, if it was okay for her to do that; and you basically told her 'yes'," Twiligiht poked her chest. "So now I'm asking, Rarity, are you sure you're okay with Atchmon being with another mare while he's living with you?"
Rarity sighed knowingly. "I'm not worried about that Twilight."
"Really?" Twilight asked skeptically.
Rarity leaned in close, as if ready to tell a secret. "Yes, really; because what I'm about to tell you stays between us."
Twilight gave her full attention. "Okay."
"I lied," she started, getting a wide-eyed response from Twilight. "I m-mated with him." She felt a wash of relief after finally revealing her deepest truth.
Twilight's rump fell to the floor in the wake of the truth-bomb, her voice left speechless and mouth agape. "W-while he was- YOU and an alien-!" She half-yelled in disbelief.
Rarity shut her mouth with magic, and got in her muzzle with a dangerous expression. "Yes, and it was wonderful, but Princess Twilight Sparkle so help me Celestia if you mention this to anypony, I will banish you to the moon myself!" She half-whispered, then put on a deranged, innocent smile.
Twilight swallowed her nervousness, knowing that when Rarity committed to a goal; she would stop at nothing to accomplish it. "Your secret is safe with me." She finished while miming the Pinkie Promise.
Rarity relaxed and her expression returned to normal. "But to really answer your question, I'm not worried, because Atchmon's culture requires him to pursue one mare, and only one mare; and that mare just so happens to be moi." She finished, placing a hoof on her chest and looking pleased with herself.
Twilight already had a notepad and pen out. "Fascinating... tell me more." Her voice trailed as she scribbled.
"Will you put that away!" Rarity exasperated.
SPIKE'S ROOM
Atchmon followed Spike outside the library and up the stairs that curved around the castle's hollow core.
It would've been an uncomfortably silent trip following behind the brooding dragon, but Atchmon was too distracted with exploring the castle to notice.
He watched Spike enter his room, setting books and scrolls onto his work desk that set beside the drake's bed.
Atchmon scanned the room, eyeing the crystalline branch-like trim that ran along the walls, matching the head of a bed.
There was a bookshelf alcove to the left of the doorway full of comic books which caught his attention.
Spike turned around and started the speech he'd been mentally practicing since last night. "I've been wanting to talk to you since- Hey put that back!" His voice raised as he rushed over to snatch his comic out of the stallion's hooves. "That's my limited-edition copy of Mistress Marevelous issue number one!" Spike fretted.
"Sorry," Atchmon said and grinned sheepishly. "Is that a good one?" He asked, remembering that some comics could go for a lot of money, if they were rare or special.
Spike couldn't help but brag a bit about his prized possession. "A good one?" He started incredulously, before cracking a proud smile. "This edition has the origin story of the Mistress's worst arch nemesis The Jester, and it has the first ever appearance of the notorious jewel thief Diamond the dog-mare!"
"Nice! That's, uh, good?" Atchmon offered, trying to match the drake's enthusiasm.
Spike narrowed his eyes incredulously. "It's not just 'good', it's in mint condition; or at least I hope it still is," he huffed and examined his comic.
Atchmon looked confused. "Then shouldn't you have that in a plastic bag, or somethin' to protect it?" he questioned sarcastically, after catching that little dig.
Spike narrowed his eyes at the stallion, then put his comic away while grumbling about being too busy.
While he was doing that, Atchmon examined the rest of Spike's room.
It was incredibly spacious with a very high ceiling. It made Atchmon feel a little jealous of the teenaged dragon. The room he grew up in only had enough space for a full-sized bed and a small dresser, while everything else was piled in a closet, along with his TV; or hung on the walls, which was often the case.
An itty-bitty living space for a big-ol' boy like himself.
But now he didn't have a space to call his own. He was taking up room in everyone else's life...
"I wanted to have a word with you about Rarity." Spike began, having interrupted Atchmon's thoughts, before they turned depressive.
Atchmon tried not to roll his eyes. 'Great another "talk", wonder how many more of these are waiting for me?' He thought bitterly, expecting quite a few more from friends and especially family.
'Oh boy... I do not want to have the heart-to-heart with Rarity's dad... give a man time to settle-in, Ponies!'
"I've known Rarity for a long time now, almost my whole life," Spike began.
Atchmon sighed. "I know, she told me a bit about you."
That got the Drake's attention. "Really?" Spike started excitedly. "What'd she say about me?" He asked eagerly, before remembering himself. "No, stay focused, Spike," He whispered to himself, then crossed his arms over his chest, trying to look cool.
Atchmon cocked a brow at him. "Look, you don't have to worry about anything. I'm not so sure Rarity and I are a thing-"
"Yes!" Spike cheered with a fist pump.
Atchmon deadpan stared at him. "Why don't ya tell me how ya really feel." He said laconically.
Spike smiled sheepishly, then coughed into his fist to regain his composure. "Listen, Rarity's happiness is very important to me, so while you're living in her house; I'm gonna be watching you," he said, trying to sound intimidating. "Like a hawk." He added.
Atchmon cracked a smile. "Why, can't you just watch me like a dragon?" He joked to lighten the mood, unknowingly insulting the drake for his lack of wings.
Spike tightened his lips and blushed furiously at the blow to his pride. Knowing he walked right into that one.
The stallion sighed in frustration, knowing he'd gotten off on the wrong hoof. 'Man, that feels weird even just thinking it'.
"Look, I get what's going on," Atchmon started, facing the young drake again, and speaking with conviction. "I've watched all my friends turn into jealous, over-protective assholes after a few days of dating their new girlfriends."
Spike raised his eyes in surprise at the profanity as he listened.
Atchmon let out a heavy sigh, the memories flooded back, as if he lived them over again. "Things always got ugly when one of them got dumped, while another friend picked up the same chick."
Spike looked a little flustered. "Rarity wouldn't- I mean, she and I were never-" He struggled to retort.
Atchmon interjected. "Right, I remember now. She said you're like a brother to her, or like a real good friend."
Spike's jaw dropped as he brayed like a donkey.
"Rarity's happiness is important to me too, so I'm gonna be there for her, like I've been doing for the past month since I found her." He finished with a hoof stomp to emphasis his point. It was a strange, natural reflex, and it felt like the right thing to do after he did it.
Atchmon and Spike locked eyes, each knowing were they stood. A battle of wills raged between them as neither dared to back down.
Atchmon was older and more seasoned in the wisdom of life and strength, and didn't feel this youngster had any sort of authority, or pull, over him. But Spike was miles ahead of him in emotional intelligence and socializing.
Soon, they both relaxed, after coming to a silent understanding.
Starlight Glimmer stood in the doorway, smiling awkwardly after catching them in the middle of a stare down. "Hey guys, everything okay in here?" She asked carefully.
Atchmon looked between her and the drake.
Spike glowered and huffed. "We're fine; does Twilight need me?" He said a tad curtly .
"I know she wants to see Atchmon in the throne room with everypony else, but I just assumed you'd come too." She suggested.
He shook his head. "I'm gonna stay up here, I'm too far behind on my assignments as it is," Spike frowned at the pile of paperwork on his desk.
Starlight cocked her head to the side. "Oookay, come on Atchmon, follow me." She said as she turned around and headed out.
Atchmon followed after her, then looked back at the drake.
Spike raised two claws up to his eyes, then pointed them at the stallion.
Atchmon tried to mock him, but failed, making an odd salute before remembering too late he didn't have fingers anymore; then left while making a face at the drake.
"So..." Starlight Glimmer failed to start a conversation as they walked.
It wasn't for lack of questions, or topics, but more from a lack of social etiquette. She didn't know if it'd be okay to talk about Atchmon's home, or his coupling with Rarity, or anything at all.
Atchmon's head perked up, expecting her to say more, but instead, they kept trotting while awkwardly glancing at one another.
Starlight Glimmer was about to start mentally beating herself for being so bad at conversation, before Atchmon interrupted her thoughts.
"Hey, uh, Rarity said you were really good with magic?" Atchmon started trepidly.
Starlight Glimmer looked at him as she forgot herself. "Yeah, you said that back at the hospital." She commented, meaning nothing behind it; she just remembered him saying that before, then Starlight looked taken aback as she witnessed Atchmon looking embarrassed.
She knew that reaction. It was the same one she'd been having ever since she joined Twilight's ensemble of close friends.
Seeing Atchmon mentally beating himself for being just as bad with conversation as she was, made her feel sympathetic towards him.
Atchmon huffed nervously. "Yeah, sorry I forgot," that was a lie, he was struggling to say anything else, but nothing came to mind. "That's cool, I mean, it's cool that you can do that; magic, I mean, not just remembering stuff I said, which is cool too; ha, good memory," he huffed a laugh, knowing he lost control of the 'conversation plane', and was crashing and burning. "Rarity doesn't do much magic." He finished abruptly.
Starlight started off looking dumbfounded, but gave him a sympathetic smile. "I could show you some magic, if you want, later?" She offered, and was pleased with herself to get a positive reaction out of him.
Atchmon beamed with excitement. "Sure, that'd be cool to see some tricks, I mean, er-um-" he floundered, too late and not enough sense to catch his mistake.
Calling real magic "tricks", would be a huge insult to a real sorceress like Starlight. But she was so confident in her own abilities, that it didn't faze her one bit.
Starlight giggled, watching him flounder his words after accidentally insulting her craft.
He shared a chuckle with her, putting him at ease.
They arrived at the Great double doors which entered into the central core of Twilight's Castle, where her throne room resided on the other side.
Starlight moved ahead and turned to face Atchmon. "Let me check and see if they're ready, first."
"Cool... cool... I'm saying 'cool' way too much, aren't I?" Atchmon stated as he fidgetted nervously.
Starlight Glimmer saw the nervousness in Atchmon's expression, the color seemed to drain from his face as he looked up at the Great double doors. "Hey, relax, it's not a big deal; they just want to get to know you a little better." She said encouragingly.
Atchmon looked thoughtful and sighed tiredly. "I know, but I just don't want to mess things up... well, no more than I already did back at the party yesterday, you know?"
She placed a comforting hoof on his shoulder. "Listen, it's okay, I know things are rough for you right now, but take it from a pony who's been there; you don't have to try so hard to make others like you; just be yourself." She advised.
"That works?" He asked jokingly.
"Eh, I'm still getting the hang of it myself." Starlight said casually as she opened the door. "Even if you do mess up, they're a really forgiving bunch," Starlight paused and turned back to him. "Like really forgiving." She emphasized.
Atchmon watched as Starlight Glimmer closed the door behind her.
Atchmon paced back and forth, but mentally he was bobbing and weaving on his tippy-hooves, like a prize fight getting ready for a round.
"Right, no pressure, just gonna have a talk with all of Rarity's friends. Thats right, I'm gonna talk their ears off." His head flicked. "I'm gonna be so polite and considerate, they won't know what hit 'em!"
Atchmon sat down and mimed with his hooves as if he were serving treats.
"I'll be like 'would you like some more tea, miss?', and they'll be like 'oh no thank you, I couldn't possibly have anymore', and I'll be like 'you've barely touched your tea cake, is it not to your liking?' His voice changed to fill each role.
Atchmon turned his whole body left and right to fill the role of both characters as they conversed as he believed the conversation would go in his mind.
"No, it's fine, really, I can't possibly have another bite." He refused politely.
"Look, this was my Nanna's recipe; and I would be very upset if you didn't have another." He insisted.
He whined in exasperation. "I don't want another, you made them too salty; okay!"
"Fine, if you don't like what I made you, then you can starve!" He finished angrily.
*click*
Atchmon straightened up in an instant before the door opened and Starlight Glimmer appeared.
She looked around the empty corridor. "Were you talking to somepony?" She asked.
"Nope," Atchmon lied and put on his best innocent expression.
Starlight looked him over suspiciously, as he was seated with a perfectly straight face; knowing he must be fibbing. "O-kay, well, they're ready for you." She turned to lead him inside.
Atchmon entered the throne room. The echoes of door hinges and his hoof-steps reverberated off the walls.
The roots of the Golden Oaks library looked like grasping claws, far more sinister and intimidating, than the wholesome and beautiful gift was meant to express.
Without thinking, he took a seat on the only available throne next to the Princess.
His mind retched as he realized too late his mistake. This wasn't his seat. But being too paralyzed with doubt, Atchmon decided to commit to his faux pas.
If they didn't want him sitting there. Then he already expected them to kick his rump out of it.
There was an uncomfortable silence as he gazed around at the others.
"Kinda feel like I'm gettin' called into the principal's office, heh-ehh..." Atchmon chuckled nervously at his joke, trying to lighten the mood; but the others --save for Pinkie, who laughed heartedly-- tittered softly.
"There's nothing to be nervous about, Atchmon, this is a safe space," Twilight responded with a gentle smile.
Rainbow Dash sat with her hooves crossed, giving him an easy smile.
Atchmon locked eyes with Fluttershy, but she lowered them and looked away.
Pinkie Pie proclaimed. "Yeah, there's nothing to be scared of, silly; we're only the greatest and most influential ponies in allllll-gasp-alllll of Equestria, aside from the other Princesses!" She jumped on the table and rushed to stand above him, pointing a hoof down at him, as if in judgement. "Your very life is in our hooves; our favor carries the weight of your future on its shoulders!" She finished dramatically.
Atchmon looked scared and swallowed his nervousness with an audible gulp.
Rarity always told him how important she and her friends were to Equestria. But hearing about something, and seeing it are two very different things. The castle and the thrones were evidence enough of that. Even though Rarity fibbed a little, proclaiming herself as the Princess, it didn't change the fact these were all very important, very powerful Ponies.
The kind of influencers that could take his livelihood away, just because they can.
He felt as if a single hoof out of line, meant a lifetime of misery and wage slavery at a fast food joint.
Rarity used her magic to lift and sit Pinkie back on her throne. "Miss Pie, what have I told you about being ridiculous." She chastised.
Pinkie stuck her tongue out funnily as she was plopped back in her seat. "Uhhh, I dunno?" She shrugged and giggled with Fluttershy at her fun.
Atchmon smiled nervously.
Twilight intervened. "We aren't like that, Atchmon; Ponies are free to choose their way of living, so long as that choice isn't a detriment to their wellbeing, or the wellbeing of others." She reassured him.
Atchmon caught sight of Starlight Glimmer lowering her head in shame for a moment.
"Do you have any questions?" The Princess asked.
"I... Is there something I should be doing?" Atchmon started. "Like getting a job, or- I guess, I gotta find my Mark-thing first, before I can get one, huh?" He asked in confusion.
Rarity interjected and spoke for him. "Oh Twilight, that reminds me, Sweetie Belle has already volunteered herself and the help of her friends to help him find his Special Talent; isn't that wonderful of her?"
Atchmon knitted his brow in thought. 'I don't remember Rarity being around for that, so how does she...'
Twilight worked her mouth, before smiling. "Yes. That is a very kind and noble thing of her to do for Atchmon, who isn't familiar with our customs; being that he isn't originally from here at all."
Rarity smiled knowingly. "Oh, I've already covered that, while we had nothing but time to ourselves in the Everfree Forest, you know, that place I was until recently?" she emphasized.
Atchmon got the feeling there was something more to this weird exchange. Rarity was using that tone of voice, that was as subtle as a wrecking ball, whenever he did something she disapproved of; but he didn't get the feel that she was using it because of him.
He looked between the two quarreling friends, suddenly feeling small and wanting to be someplace else.
His attention rose as Twilight nodded, and she directed her speech to him next.
"Atchmon, I had many reservations about you, but I want to extend my apologies with everypony present, I'm sorry for being stand-offish around you," She apologized sincerely. "I just want to add, that my reasons for doing so were well-founded." She directed a pout towards Starlight and Rarity each.
Rarity smiled serenely, while Starlight grinned knowingly.
Atchmon knitted his brows in confusion. "It's okay?" he offered. "Rarity was pretty weirded out too, when we first met." He finished with a smile towards her, which was returned fondly.
Twilight cleared her throat. "But yes, evoking your Cutie Mark will help with finding where you'll be most happy in our society." She answered.
Rarity chimed in. "But there's no rush, I assume you'd like to take a couple weeks to relax and enjoy not having to struggle for our next meal?" She suggested.
"That'd be great," Atchmon chuckled in relief. "You'd think having two extra legs would help me stand on my own in half the time, but right now, I feel like a stiff breeze could knock me down."
Trotting around Ponyville was easy enough, but every step lacked the confidence of his surefootedness.
Rainbow Dash barked. "I can be your workout buddy, I'll have you galloping in no time; you might even finish in the top twenty when it's time for the next Running of the Leaves, after I'm done with you!"
Atchmon didn't know anything about what she was saying. But it sounded good, so he accepted her offer with a nod and a grateful smile.
Pinkie piped up. "I'm sure Rarity showed you all that fancy-schmacy stuff, but I can show you were all the cool cats and dogs hang out, we'll throw a big party and get you lots and lots of friends; just like when Twilight first came here!"
Twilight cringed at that.
Fluttershy gave her input. "Speaking of animals, I could always use some help around my cottage, all my little critter each have their own special needs, its hard to accommodate them all."
Atchmon looked down, and took a moment to get control of his emotions.
They were all being so nice to him.
"Thank ya'll," he rasped, but managed to hold back tears.
"Is there anything else, Atchmon?" Twilight asked.
"Ha-iff," he started to speak, but hesitated; looking over at Rarity to be sure it was really okay. "Uh, one other thing..."
Rarity spoke. "Go ahead, darling; this is an open forum, just speak your mind, there won't be any judgements here."
Atchmon shifted in his seat, and thought back to his experiences while roaming through the pony village. "Well... I was thinkin', would I have to change my name if my Mark shows up?" He directed the question more at Twilight, who he saw as more the authority on such things.
Ponies had some reactions towards his name. It was only logical to change it. In his mind it offered a slightly higher chance of survival. The Ponies will see him more as one of them; but that was just half the problem. The other being he needed to find his talent.
'May as well try, looks like I'm gonna be here for the rest of my life; don't wanna leave one world just to end up with the same life in another,' he thought bitterly; remembering how much of an outcast he was.
"Oh, well, that's all up to you; most Ponies who aren't part of a big clan will usually change their names when their mark comes," Asked Twilight, not expecting such a question. "Do you have one in mind? I can get the paperwork started, while I'm registering you as a new citizen of Equestria." She offered.
"I dunno," he thought a moment. "What sort of name should I pick?"
"A funny one!" Chirped Pinkie.
"Um... a nice one, would be good." Whispered Fluttershy.
"A cool one!" Rainbow Dash rasped.
"Darling, why pick a new name at all? Yours is fine the way it is." Rarity asked in concern.
Rainbow spoke up. "I'm not so sure Rare, it's an 'okay' name, but it's not really a Pony one. Plus it's kinda hard to say, Ackmin." She shrugged.
Atchmon mulled his thoughts over for a second. "Mmm... Red Baron." He stated.
"Ooh, nice one," Rainbow cooed cooly. "But you're not very red," she critiqued, rubbing her chin.
"No." Rarity deadpanned.
Pinkie Pie listed off. "How 'bout, um, Slim Jim, or Bony Brony; NO! Copper Cutie, Copper Cutie!" Pinkie clopped excitedly.
Atchmon joked with her. "Bacon-Pancakes! Or, no. Sassage-Gravy; Maybe Sea-Biscuit?"
"We're not anywhere near the ocean!" Rarity blurted, unable to take anymore of Atchmon's shenanigans.
"Buahhahahaha; I like this guy!" Rainbow Dash cackled, while wiping away a joyful tear from her eye. "OK maybe Ashman isn't so bad, he-heh." She giggled and wiped a tear away.
"I've never heard names so ridiculous, or so breakfast-related... Why does that sound familiar?" Twilight wondered.
Atchmon declared happily. "Well, I'm gettin' hungry, what's there to eat around here!"
The others agreed on grabbing something from the kitchen, with Rarity suggesting they should have a picnic.
Atchmon felt like everything was going to be okay, seeing all of Rarity's friends treating him as part of the group.
Sensing that the meeting was adjourned, everypony--except Atchmon-- simultaneously got up from their thrones and filed out of the castle with Atchmon lagging behind.
The stallion hung his head and took a breath to calm himself, feeling glad that the meeting was over, before following after them.
He turned back looking at the Castle-Map, and approached it; ignoring the others as they exited the room. The echo of Pinkie's voice carried in from the doorway, the others sighing at a bad joke she told, or her proclaims to eating a barrels worth of cupcakes; he couldn't tell, being too preoccupied with his conflicting thoughts.
Atchmon stared down at the holographic Map of Equestria, his eyes locked onto the familiar visage of Twilight's Castle, giving him a point-of-interest to start with. There was the town of Ponyville spread out among its base, and to the east of that...
The Everfree Forest.
Hundreds of square miles of dense forest blotted a good portion of the idyllic landscape; marring the beautiful, pristine, Utopian continent as an ever present reminder of the dangers which plagued the Pony's world.
His ire towards the relic spiked for just a moment. "Couldn't have gotten to me sooner?" He gruffed at the magic table. Feeling as though he could've been rescued at any time in the past, but somehow the timing (6 years of it) just wasn't convenient enough for the magic relic.
He sighed, unable to sort out his feelings; the foremost of which was apathy towards the relic. Atchmon didn't know how to feel about some magic tree-house-castle-map dictating it's will over his life.
But the map remained stoic, regardless; offering no answers.
Atchmon sighed, knowing he should feel grateful for the second chance at life he's been given now.
And he was grateful to be alive... he just wished it were in the body he was born with, and in the world he came from.
In his mind, the map had the power to do anything. So why didn't it give him that? Was it giving him a choice? To try being a pony over a human? Did it know something, he didn't?
Why was he here?
From what Rarity told him about their Cutie Quests, the map possessed some sort of omnipotent power. Did it just know he'd be happier here, than in his own world?
Or was there a higher purpose he'd yet to fulfill?
Atchmon shook his head of the thoughts plaguing him.
There was little chance he'd be meant for anything greater than what he was now.
A useless bum, sleeping on Rarity's couch, and living under her roof.
Rarity's voice called from in the hallway. "Atchmon, aren't you coming?"
He turned from the crystalline table, then looked back to give the map one last melancholy stare, before cantering away to catch up with the others.
Everypony was outside the Castle of Friendship sitting on a picnic blanket enjoying their snacks, while also looking towards the sky and enjoying an aerial acrobatic show.
"Whoa-ho-ho!" Atchmon laughed and clopped in delight as Rainbow Dash did a fly-by right above their heads, blowing himself and the crowd of friends with a massive gust of wind in her rainbow-streaked wake. "Whoo-hoo!" He cheered, waving his hooves above his head, before cupping his mouth and shouting. "Yeah!"
Rainbow Dash grinned proudly, relishing the praise at her awesomeness, pushing herself to fly faster, to bank harder, and roll tighter. All to impress her newest fan.
"Gosh she's fast!" He gasped with Rarity sitting next to him, sipping her tea like a proper lady. A demure smile played across her lips at his excitement and wonder towards the rainbow speedster's performance.
Rainbow Dash flew high above the castle grounds, soaring ever upwards to put a safe distance between her finale and the spectators.
"Ooh here it comes!" Pinkie clopped in anticipation, while Atchmon squinted at the tiny black dot of Rainbow Dash, trying to shield his eyes from the sun.
Rainbow Dash went into a downward dive, pumping her wing and gaining speed as she dove towards the earth; magically compressed air formed a cone around her body, until she broke through its barrier.
*BOOOM!*
Atchmon flinched at the unexpected explosion and subsequent corona of rainbow colors spreading out from the flier's epicenter. His face fell in awe at the grandiose display.
Rarity laughed giddily at the stallion's reaction, knowing the human-pony had never seen such a beautifully wondrous display.
Rainbow Dash flew at super-sonic speed around the Castle and grounds, wrapping her rainbow-colored ribbon of light around everything before skidding to a halt before the crowd.
"That was so totally wicked!" Atchmon shouted while waving his hooves excitedly in the air.
Rainbow Dash tossed her mane back relishing the praise, while cantering coolly towards her friends, as if it weren't a big deal. She kept her breathing under control just to make herself seem cooler, despite her thudding heart and beads of sweat after the rigorous exercise.
As she got nearer to the group, a tan Pegasus mare with a platinum-white mane landed, blocking her path. The mare wore a business suit, hat and sunglasses; her cutie-mark was a wax seal with a judge's gavel as the insignia.
"You're an easy one to find, Miss Dash," said the mare casually. "I was prepared to wait a few days at your cloudominium for you to stop by, but luckily I don't have to!" She chirped.
The others looked around in confusion, unsure of what was going on with the official-looking mare.
Rainbow Dash put on a look of disgusted confusion. It wasn't the first stalker she had to deal with, and usually Rainbow could deal with those by giving them the ride of their life a few thousand feet in the air at supersonic speed--in the 'not fun' way. Then they wouldn't bother her again, but this pony seemed different; almost too casual and comfortable with being around a famous Wonderbolt.
"Uh, is there something I can help you with?" Rainbow asked suspiciously.
The mare smiled toothily and gushed. "I gotta say, I'm a big fan," then looked regretful. "But unfortunately I'm also here on behalf of the Cloudsdale Supreme Justices," she extended her wing and presented an envelope pinched between her primaries. "I'm sorry to do this to you Rainbow Dash, but you've been served, your hearing is in a few weeks."
Atchmon stayed behind as the others trotted around Rainbow Dash to see what was the matter.
The mare flew away as Rainbow Dash tore open the letter with her teeth and read it.
"What is it Rainbow?" asked Twilight, seeing her friend's eyes darting over the parchment, before her look turned worrisome.
Rainbow whispered in disbelief. "It's a soup- soupy..." She looked up and cried in anguish. "I- I've been served a soup-ticket, Twilight; my life is ruined!" She cried.
Twilight used her magic to swipe the parchment from Rainbow's hooves. Her eyes quickly scanned the page. "It's a subpoena, you're being summoned before the Cloudsdale Military Council for... missed movement, dereliction of duties, and going AWOL."
Rainbow grasped her friend. "Twilight you have to help me, I don't wanna get kicked out of the Bolts!" She cried, clearly looking upset and freaking out.
Atchmon felt like he was 2-inches tall, watching the scene as it unfolded.
Rarity was talking about calling in some favors and looking vexed. Pinkie was throwing out suggestions on what she would do, including infiltrating Cloudsdale High Command, while hiding inside a giant cake.
Twilight tried explaining that it was all out of her hooves. Starlight was pointing out all the flaws in the document and in the law.
Fluttershy was just doing her best to console Rainbow Dash, who looked shell-shocked grasping at her legs while she rocked back and forth in the fetal position.
And all Atchmon could think, was how it was all his fault.
Author's Note
Bleh. Hopefully this turned out alright. Life hit hard these last 7 months; but I'm on the cusp of finally getting back to normal, and not having to deal with any extra shit.
I don't understand the process of a dishonorable discharge in the airforce; but I'm doing my best on minimal research.
Not a lot else to say about this one. Hope ya'll enjoy it.
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