You Know You Want To
written by Little Tigress
edited by NotSoWickedWitch
It all started with a touch.
Nothing really special, it was a simple touch in the forehead. And honestly, it was difficult to believe that a simple contact on the head had made it all possible. But that’s just how it was. Sunset Shimmer had touched Pinkie Pie in the forehead, thanks to her new magic, she got inside her friend’s head, and she got to see the odd world inside the mind of the most hyperactive girl in the whole dimension. And admittedly, first, it was… fun.
For surprised Sunset, it was an astounding, yet eerie experience to be inside of that colorful world, full of smiles and dancing candy.
For ecstatic Pinkie, it was an opportunity. A moment that, for the first time since she had left her rock farm, that someone had actually gotten to truly understand her.
During the last days of the camp, Sunset had discovered a certain pleasure while being in Pinkieland. A world completely different of every other she had been in. There, everything was pink, rainbow shades everywhere and eternal laughter that beat along with pop music. It was crazy. Unpredictable. Wild. And Sunset found herself loving it all.
In the past, she had expressed her discontent for everything that was different from her standards, forcing everyone in Canterlot High to stick to the status quo. However, just being in this sugar-coated wonderland known as Pinkie Pie’s mind was nothing but different.
Pinkie was the kind of girl that could do six impossibilities before starting class. Juggle about seven different objects at the same time for hours. Remember every single person she came across, and just about everything about them. She was energetic, joyful, cloying in every possible way. Even so, Sunset had learned to love her. And mental escape had became the foundation of a new, enduring friendship.
Entering that candyland, the two friends had tried only one direction, and that was exploration and investigation. Pinkie’s mind was an open book for Sunset to read, yet it was all the fiery haired girl was able to do was to watch. Just, watch. The colors, the dancing candy, the smiles. Sunset was nothing but a spectator.
That changed with time. After some tries Sunset realized she was no longer a mere viewer. The former Equestrian had known it was thanks to her magic, the frequency of her visits to Pinkie’s mind, that this was all possible. And she couldn’t just let it waste away watching things go on like a puppet show.
She was a little afraid, but other than that she really didn’t care. Being part of her friend’s crazy imagination was a new experience. And it was a good one.
Sunset wanted to travel to Pinkie’s mind. She wanted to be there, in that crazy space full of fun, far away from the real world and its constant problems. But even she knew it was not right. It wasn’t right to use her friend as an excuse to get away from her own problems.
She was full of remorse, still. She knew that Pinkie didn’t care, rather enjoying it herself. Had she known what could happen, Sunset would have stopped. She could have learned to control her yearning of that randomness that only existed in Pinkie Pie.
Maybe it was half of summer. Maybe school was just a week away. She had no idea. Sunset Shimmer just knew one thing, and it was that this was the day to clarify some things with Pinkie Pie.
It was a pretty hot afternoon and Sunset was wearing shorts and a light blue blouse. Her jacket was in the closet, and honestly, she really didn’t want to wear it that day. She was pretty nervous for what she was about to do, and she also knew that it was something she had to do.
“If I don’t do this today, I’ll never do it,” she murmured to herself as she let out a sigh, allowing herself a moment to internally prepare for the event to come.
Closing the door to her apartment, Sunset began to walk towards the bus stop. She had passed all her usual spots, instantly waved to all of her neighbors and classmates passing by. Whether the walk itself took long, or not, she barely noticed, being completely lost inside her mind.
“At least this time is your own, Sunset” she said to herself, her words bitter.
The bus shortly arrived the moment she made it to her destination. Fortunately, there weren't many people to disturb or bother her, and Sunset thanked Celestia or whatever divinity that would be listening for allowing that to happen. While she stepped on and took a seat, she had to quietly remind herself that in this world, Principal Celestia was just another employee of the system.
Through the window she could see everything and nothing at the same time. The world blurred in front of her. It was difficult to concentrate; anxiety accumulated itself in her chest. She felt like her head was about to explode. The only thing she wanted was to arrive with Pinkie and escape.
No. She wanted to talk. Just talk.
She didn’t notice the moment her transport stopped, but to be honest, she had been missing a lot of things lately. She didn’t care about anything since the day she decided to stop what she was doing with Pinkie Pie.
She stepped off the bus. On the streets there wasn’t anyone else, anywhere. Odd, because Fridays were the days there were usually a lot of people in the mall. Sunset shrugged. It didn’t matter. The less people were there, the better.
Sunset sighed at the moment the electric doors of the mall opened.
Pinkie Pie surely was waiting for her at the fast food court. It wasn’t strange, since if Sunset remembered correctly, that’s where the two usually hung out so Pinkie would wait for her there. Yet today, it felt as if the whole building was as strange and new to her as a taxicab driver you’d only known for an hour or two.
Sunset took a series of quick breaths trying to calm herself, but her heart kept galloping like a wild horse. And her mind didn’t stop wondering why the heck she had made that analogy.
When Sunset arrived to the fast food zone she saw her. She was sitting at a lonely table, moving her head at the rhythm of a non-existent song while drinking a strawberry milkshake. The girl at the table didn't even glance; still she gave a quick greeting to Sunset Shimmer. Sunset would have been surprised if she hadn’t spent so much time inside of Pinkie’s mind. The newcomer girl returned the gesture as she got closer to her friend.
“Hiya there, Sunny!” said Pinkie when Sunset finally took a seat.
“Hey, Pinkie.”
While the girl with curly hair continued enjoying her milkshake, Sunset was quiet trying to organize her thoughts for the fifth time that entire day. Her mouth feeling suddenly dry, and little bumps beginning to form on her arms.
“Is something wrong?”
Sunset almost jumped when she heard Pinkie’s voice. The fiery haired girl shook her head.
Pinkie Pie narrowed her eyes, looking at her mate.
“I’m fine, Pinkie” said Sunset after she rinsed the sweat from her forehead. “I’m just a little nervous, that’s all it is…”
“And why are you nervous, Sunny?” asked the young girl taking yet another sip of her milkshake.
Sunset knew that this was the sign of no return. It was the moment to say it.
“Pinkie,” said Sunset with a sigh, giving in.
“Yes, Sunset?” answered Pinkie blinking rapidly.
“There’s something I need to tell you…”
Pinkie dropped her drink, now fully concentrated on whatever Sunset had to say.
“You’re one of my best friends, and I really think you’re one of the most amazing people I’ve ever been with. And these last weeks have just been awesome.”
“D’aww!” exclaimed Pinkie, jumping from her seat and giving Sunset a suffocating hug. “Oh Sunset! It’s been amazing for me too! Now I know why you were so nervicited.”
“Really?” Sunset didn’t know if she felt confused, afraid, relieved, or a mix of the three.
“Of course! I don’t know how I could have forgotten it!” Then Pinkie let out a giggle, as a personal joke.
“Pinkie…”
“It’s our three-and-a-half week anniversary!” Pinkie let Sunset free; at that very moment several explosions erupted. People started screaming and running, a couple of teenagers were crying, but everyone calmed down when they realized the cannons, that had suddenly appeared out of nowhere, just threw confetti.
Sunset’s heart shrunk at the sight of the flying papers gliding around her girlfriend. She looked so happy, smiling in a cute and affectionate way. The small amount of determination with which Sunset had awakened, disappeared as fast as cupcakes at a party.
“Of course…” exclaimed Sunset pretending to be happy, when she really wanted to scream of frustration. Every time she tried to say it, or at least to imply it, Pinkie Pie did something cute, or something that just made Sunset regret her decision of breaking up in the first place.
“Happy Anniversary!” screamed Pinkie as she caught Sunset with a tight hug.
Suddenly, Sunset felt as vulnerable as a helpless filly that feared to tell her mom that her favorite flower pot was broken. She knew that she had to tell Pinkie before it went too far.
Just, not yet.
“Heh, heh,” Sunset awkwardly chuckled, softly hugging her girlfriend back. “Happy Anniversary, Pinkie.”
…
“Where are you taking me? I thought you weren’t going to throw a party. ”
“Right!”
“So?”
“Just because I’m not throwing a party for our month anniversary,” Pinkie smiled as she grabbed Sunset’s hand, “doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate today!”
“And is that enough to justify the blindfold?” growled the fiery haired girl in confusion.
Pinkie shook her head, ignoring the fact that her mate was artificially blinded.
“Surprises only are surprises when you don’t see them coming, silly!” Then Pinkie stopped and poked her girlfriend’s nose. Sunset frowned, and the two automatically began their stroll once again.
“I get that,” Sunset sourly mumbled, yet thankfully loud enough for Pinkie to hear.
Before Pinkie could reply, Sunset added:
“In fact, I have a surprise for you too.”
“Aw! Thanks Sunset.”
“Although I’m not sure you will like it.”
Pinkie made them stop again.
“If this surprise is from you, I’m sure I’ll like it,” Pinkie insisted, untying the blindfold and letting Sunset see the huge smile on her face. “No one knows me better than you, Sun!”
Before Sunset could get her senses back, Pinkie attacked, giving her a delicate kiss on the lips.
“Surprise,” whispered the pink girl in her ears, in a seductive yet playful manner that Sunset didn’t even think Pinkie was capable of producing.
Sunset looked around the room; it was Pinkie Pie’s house. The kitchen to be precise. On the table on the center of the room was a small yellow cake with pink meringue and a couple of candles. Next to the cake was a letter folded with a simple inscription.
“To Sunset.”
“Thank you very much, Pinkie, but I…” Sunset was nervous, her hand shivered as she tried to reach the letter.
“No buts! Now you’re going to relax and eat some cake.”
Pinkie forced Sunset to sit down in a nearby chair. Shortly after, the pink girl took a seat in front of her and began to cut the cake. She gave Sunset a fork, playing her slice on a rather funny designed cake, and the duo began to eat. Pinkie was smiling her usual smile, while Sunset, on the other hand, felt like every bite was full of guilt. She just couldn’t continue with this.
“Pinkie, do you remember what I told you awhile ago?” commented Sunset once she finished swallowing her previous slice of cake.
The girl in front of her nodded, her cheeks full of dessert.
“We, well, need to talk. And it’s kind of related to that.”
Pinkie swallowed the cake. Thanks to her experience of parties and people, she knew that those words always were a signal of one thing: danger.
“Okay, what do you want to talk about?”
Sunset’s hands twitched over her blouse.
'Come on, you’ve already made it this far', Sunset said to herself. She tried to convince herself to keep forward.
“I need to clarify something with you, Pinkie,” heavily exhaled Sunset, feeling something inside her chest twisting with every word that escaped her lips.
“Of course.” replied Pinkie Pie, a fake smile in her face. She tried to keep herself calm for the storm to come in the next minutes. Still, her mind kept reproaching itself to somethings.
Maybe this was because of that time when we went to Burger Princess?' Pinkie thought, frowning at the stupid idea she had to invite Sunset to eat to a burger restaurant on her first date. She used to be a horse, for cupcake’s sake!
Sunset nodded, somehow uneasy for not knowing what was happening on Pinkie’s mind at that moment.
Of course, that was what started the problem in the first place.
“Pinkie, I really have enjoyed our time together,” began Sunset; she realized that Pinkie’s expression was no longer jovial but a serious one, unthinkable in such an energetic girl. Her arms were cross.
“But?” interrupted Pinkie raising an eyebrow, her lip slightly quivering.
At that moment, Sunset knew there was no coming back. It was time to say what she had been keeping since the day they returned from Camp Everfree. The look Pinkie gave her indicated it was already too late to retract.
“But…”
Her mouth was dry, as if the words would have been evaporated before Pinkie’s fiery, yet melancholic gaze.
“Yes?”
“I don’t think we can continue this… way,” said Sunset making some gestures with her hands pointing at her and then at Pinkie.
“Oh,” sadly exclaimed Pinkie with such a monotone expression that would have made Maud proud. “That’s it?”
The fiery haired girl froze. Maybe she was afraid, maybe it was the impact of her friend’s words. Maybe it was a mix of both.
“WHAT?!” Sunset’s face disarranged from her deafening scream. She quickly stood from her seat, nearly knocking over the nearby furniture Pinkie had previously set up.
Pinkie said nothing. Keeping that disturbing calm look of hers, she allowed Sunset to continue.
“I’ve been arguing with myself for days the way that I should tell you this. Do you know how many nights of sleep I lost just thinking how to say it?”
The pink haired girl shrugged.
“Many!”
“Then why didn’t you just say it before, Sunset?”
Before that, Sunset kept quiet, totally unsure on how to respond. She wasn’t even sure she had a clear answer to give.
Pinkie stood up, with a distant smile, allowing herself to speak in a much more normal tone:
“You liked it, didn’t you?”
Sunset didn’t know what her friend was talking about, so her body acted alone. She nodded.
“Me too. It was odd to think you could see what’s inside of my mind, you know?”
Sunset nodded again.
“No one had ever understand me like that before! Not even my twin sister Marble, and we were connected by the hip!” Pinkie exclaimed, both girls were facing each other. “And then you actually entered in there. I didn’t think it was even possible!”
“Me neither,” Sunset giggled. “I guess it was because of the regularity with which we did it, the mental escape I mean.”
“But, Sunset,” Pinkie was smiling, but her eyes were glassy, at the edge of tears. “I couldn’t enter your mind as you do with mine. And now, well, you know me at such deep level. I just thought I should try to do the same.”
“I get that, but why this way?” questioned Sunset, a little bit confused.
“Because being best friends wasn’t enough? Is that what you mean, Sunny?” the girl nodded. “Well, even as the bestest of best friends there wasn’t a way I could get to know you better. When we started dating you didn’t say a thing, you didn’t stop me so I just guessed that you agreed.”
Sunset raised her hand to the back of her neck, ashamed. She could feel her cheeks burning up, already.
“I’ve learned so much about you in these weeks, much more than what I learned in a whole year of friendship.”
Pinkie took a step closer to Sunset.
“Now I know that you like when I scratch the back of your ears.” Pinkie did as she said. Sunset blushed even deeper than before.
“I also know that you tend to neigh when you laugh really hard.”
“That’s… that’s not true” moaned Sunset, her face red as an apple.
Pinkie smiled, her hand stroked her mate’s cheek.
“I also learned that, no matter how uncomfortable this was for you, you’d keep going simply to not see me sad.”
At that moment Pinkie Pie did the last thing Sunset would have expected. Her body felt an odd warmth at the moment Pinkie’s lips touched her own. It wasn’t the first time they kissed, that had already happened weeks ago, in fact, it was the reason why Sunset and Pinkie started dating.
She remembered it pretty different. The first time it had been clumsy, at least Sunset’s part. It had been rushed. Not fully reciprocated. The first time Sunset had followed Pinkie thinking it was just another game, just like their mental escapes. Then she realized it had been more than that. She also realized it couldn’t go on like this. It wasn’t fair, not for Pinkie.
Now it was different. Sunset realized that Pinkie really had gotten to know her in a deeper form. And she knew it thanks to that second kiss. It had been more… special. Delicate. Sweet. Full of love. Yet it was bitter. It tasted like a farewell.
They separated.
Pinkie Pie walk away from the perplexed Sunset Shimmer. The pink girl opened the refrigerator and took out a cake. This one had been iced with the letters:
PP & SS= BFF!
“I had it just in case.”
She gave it to Sunset, with one final smile:
“I also learned that chocolate isn’t your favorite flavor.”
Sunset watched the cake a little reticent. She could not believe how it turned out in the end. She had hoped for more screams, more tears, more… anything.
“Come on, Sunny, take a bite!”
Sunset didn’t touch the cake; she just kept looking at it as if it were a bomb about to explode.
“Come on, Sunset, you know you want to.”
The teal-eyed girl glanced again at the dessert in her hands, still a bit unsure she took a bite.
“Thank you again, Pinkie Pie.”
Then both girls smiled again. Sunset was relieved, after all this time she was, at least, in peace.
And the vanilla and strawberry cake was absolutely delicious.
Author's Note
I do not really ship Sunset and Pinkie, but the final scene of the blooper reel was just too tempting 
I want to thank my editor for helping me to make this story a little better, what am I saying? Thanks for helping me doing it a lot better NotSoWickedWitch!
So what do you think? Did you like it? Did you not like it? why? and why am I doing so many questions?
