A Lesson from a Dumbass

by Nugget

Rating: mature
Tags: Random, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Original Character
Length: 1762

While in therapy, Rainbow Dash vents out some of her past frustrations... unfiltered.

Based on the events from "Tanks for the Memories," "Trade Ya!", and "Newbie Dash."

While in therapy, Rainbow Dash vents out some of her past frustrations... unfiltered.

Edited by tommal
Mature for language

Published 2016-12-28 17:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-12-28 17:30:01 UTC

A Lesson from a Dumbass

The time was one o’clock.

Inside the Psychiatric Ward at the Ponyville Hospital, a cyan pony lounged comfortably on a brown, synthetic leather chaise. As Rainbow Dash blankly stared up at the ceiling, she contemplated on the words she wanted to address. She also questioned herself on the reasons as to why she wanted to be inside a therapeutic office in the first place. After a short sigh, Dash made up her mind and looked over at a brown unicorn that sat behind an intricate wood desk.

Dr. Bucker, Dash’s therapist, glared back at her through his half moon glasses. “Alright Ms. Dash,” he stated in this thick Equestrian accent. “Just I like I said. Whenever you are ready, just talk it out.”

She nodded.

“Hello,” the pegasus spoke. “My name is Rainbow Dash, and I am the biggest dumbass in all of Equestria.”

She huffed, “Now I know what you are thinking, Doc, Why is someone as cool and awesome as you are be saying such a mean thing as that? Well, guess what, kiddo, it's true. I have made some of the biggest mistakes on this side of Equestria since Princess Luna sold her herself to black magic.”

“Well, do you feel bad about some of these decisions that you made?” Dr. Bucker asked.

“Oh, believe me. I felt horrible about some of them,” Dash replied, turning her head away.

“Ok, I lied,” she moaned. “I felt terrible about a lot of the blunders I’ve made. Do you know what though? I lived and learned from these mistakes and I always will try to improve from them regardless of how stupid the situations were...”

“Even if I did cause some of them to happen,” she admitted before turning her attention towards her hooves.

“However,” she picked her head up and panned over towards Dr. Bucker. “After going through some of these events, I do have some choice words to say...”

“Shall I?” Rainbow turned towards Dr. Bucker, not entirely sure that he would want to hear her out.

The therapist replied, “Continue, please. No one else, but me, is going to hear this.”

“Alright.” Rainbow Dash cleared her throat. “A few months back, I was accused by some ponies for almost selling my best friend, Fluttershy, into service for someone’s slobbering pet.”

“Really? Go on,” said Dr. Bucker, scribbling some notes on a clipboard.

“Well, HOW IN TARTARUS was that fucking legal?” she screamed. “Seriously!?! I either blame Princess Twilight for her ACCIDENTAL oversight or Princess Celestia for not having enough of a will to get off her fat, cake eating ass to change the damn law! If we did live in a perfect world, I would have been spared in that moment and Fluttershy wouldn’t be up the creek in dog shit!”

“Well,” the therapist asked, adjusting his glasses. “What happened afterwards?”

“The universe had other plans,” Rainbow stated. “Luckily, through the good grace of the owner, and one bullshit of a sob story from me later, It was overturned and Fluttershy wasn’t going to be someone’s bitch for a while. However, that story is just the tip of this cold, unbarring iceberg. Shall I continue?”

The Doctor nodded with a reassured smile. “Yes, of course.”

“Well then…” Dash continued, “Speaking of the cold and Fluttershy, WASN’T winter just a wonderful time for Tank to go the fuck asleep!”

“And who is Tank?” Dr. Bucker asked.

“My pet tortoise that sleeps in the winter. Apparently, his excuse is this BS thing called hi-ber-na-tion!” Dash said, rolling her eyes.

Dr. Bucker looked down on his desk. Scanning through the notes he took in prior meetings with Rainbow Dash, he pointed to a page of his notes. “From what I remember you telling me earlier, you said that Fluttershy sold this pet to you, correct?”

“And?” Dash snapped, really just wishing to get out of his stuffy office as soon as possible.

“Did she tell you that tortoises sleep during the winter?”

“No!” Dash replied with a bit of haste. “...and I never bothered to look that up either since I never thought Tank would do that!”

“So,” Dr. Bucker set his glasses down and crossed his hooves. “What happened after you found out that Tank did, in fact, sleep during the winter?”

“BS.” Dash waved her hooves out. “A whole ton of BS that I really don’t want to painfully recall. Sorry.”

“Ok.” The therapist rubbed his poll. “Was there any way this could have been prevented?”

“Yeah, easy,” Dash snorted. “Fluttershy could have told me about the hibernation thing first instead of waiting until it actually happened!”

“Did she, Fluttershy, assume you knew?” the therapist asked.

Rainbow Dash threw her hooves up in the air. “I guess, but, she could taken a short time out of her day to tell me this fact instead of going away with Tree Fucker all the time.”

“And what do they do, again?” Dr. Bucker asked, looking back at his notes.

“Observe the very same things they live around!” Dash assumed in a mocking tone.

Dr. Bucker looked back up at Rainbow Dash with an eyebrow lifted. It seemed to her that he didn’t quite appreciate the open ended answer he got. With a slight squint in his eye, he shook his head before levitating an ink dipped quill in a purple aura. He wrote down new notes while looking back at Rainbow Dash.

Dr. Bucker continued, “Ok. So can you admit their might have been a lack in communication between you and Fluttershy?”

Rainbow Dash rolled her head around. “I guess, I mean, I never really thought of it that way since, at the time, I was still going through the five stages of absolute pain and agony.”

There was a short silence.

“But mostly pain,” Dash thought out loud.

The therapist waved his hoof out. “Do you think there could have been a moment where you or her could have said something to each other to address the issue at hand?”

“Well, there were plenty of moments I will admit, but…” Dash trailed off, hesitant.

“But?”

“But, I, in those moments, was letting my emotions get in the way of rational thought,” Dash replied, lowering her head.

“Why?” Dr. Bucker asked.

“Because that is the most Airheaded thing I do!” she yelled. “Every single time something, in any way, dramatic happens to me, I let my emotions control me to the point of utter embarrassment.”

The therapist continued to write down his notes. “Ok. Can you give me another example of when your emotions got the better of you?”

“Yeah, yeah, getting to that,” Dash replied with a dismissive wave of her hoof. “After I became an official member of the Wonderbolts, on the very first day I accidently forget to obey a safety rule which ended up with me crashing into a garbage can.”

She continued, “Afterwards, the entire team started calling me “Rainbow Crash.” Which, coincidently, was the exact same nickname I got at a flight summer camp in Cloudsdale when I was a filly.”

“So what did you do when they started calling you by that name?” Dr. Bucker asked. “I mean, did you address it to them that it bothered you once before?”

Rainbow took a short breath. “No. Like I said, I let my past emotions come back to me and take over my thoughts. I then became so obsessed and determined to get rid of the nickname that I guess...”

She paused with a sigh. “That I guess it never occurred to me to just talk it out to my fellow wing-ponies. To tell them that the nickname bothered me like it did...”

“But...” Dash formed a slight scowl on her face. “I will admit whoever came up with the idea for Wonderbolt nicknames was stupid. They’re really cruel and a bit unnecessary.”

“Alright now,” the therapist stated, peeking over the tops of his glasses. “So, you never told them?”

“Yeah,” Rainbow groaned, turning her head back towards the ceiling. “I think it would have helped, but-”

“I would think so,” the therapist said firmly. “I’m sure if they would have known how upset you got over the name beforehoof, then would have things turned out different than what had happened?”

“Yeah,” Dash repeated. “They would have.”

“And if you or Fluttershy would have talked about what Tank does in the winter, then do you think mishaps could have been prevented in the first place?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Dash stated for a third time. “And you’re right, Doc, I should have been more open to talking about those things.”

“And?” he asked with a slight pitched voice.

“I guess the next time my emotions get in the way, I should know to not act upon them?” Dash stated with slight uncertainty.

“If that is what you think, then I think that would be a good idea” Dr. Bucker proclaimed. “I suggest then afterwards you should just state your side of the case, like you not liking your certain nickname, and then being open towards what they have to say. That way, you can at least get a conversation going.”

“And not let my emotions and thoughts take over?” Dash assumed while looking back at the therapist.

“Exactly.” He chuckled for a moment before he gazed up at his wall clock. The time was two o'clock and that meant their hour together was finished for the week. As soon as Rainbow Dash realized the time as well, she got off the couch and walked over to Dr. Bucker to shake his hoof and say, “Thank you.”

“No problem,” he replied. “Same time next week?”

“Exactly,” she smiled.

Author's Note

"Your emotions are the slaves to your thoughts, and you are the slave to your emotions." - Elizabeth Gilbert

Hey Readers,

Thank you very much for taking the moment to read this fic. Please share it, comment on it, and favorite it while also taking the opprotunity to check out my other stories as well! As for this one, I always felt like RD emotions have played a critical roll towards what she has done in the past episodes. If she did learn to communicate a bit better, then I think a lot of her conflicts could have been resolved a bit faster... but that is just me.

Anyway, thank you very much... again.

Nugget

P.S: If you see any grammar errors in the story, please PM them to me and I will work swiftly to correct them.