Multi-Author Brony Musician NSFW Storyby BelgerumChapters1. Where the madness starts2. Where the madness is Sparta3. Where the madness has a penis4. Where the madness BADONKADONKS1. Where the madness startsBonus Dramatic Reading by Belgerum INB4 A CLOPFIC. whoops..... Once upon a time, Rainbow Dash was eating apples at Sugarcube Corner, when suddenly, “KABLAM!” (was a great show) IT WAS TRIXIE!!!!!! “AH SHIT I FUCKED TRIXIE” said Twilight Sparkle “Penis penis penis” said Trixie in response, while sucking rule 63 Kyoga’s dick. (because he was definitely there.) Indeed, they were Futas... “Why am I in this again?” groaned Kyoga. Kyoga’s words then began to fall apart as his speech was impeded by his moans of pleasure. The sensations of pleasure going through his dick felt so good, as Trixies fapulously moist saliva covered his 4 foot long penis. “Sup niggas?” asked Chromatic, who now has swag. He was immediately tackled by Lyra, who began rapidly humping his ear. Chromatic decided it would be best to remain out of the fanfiction due to the result of his previous writings. But nooo, someone had to put him back in the fic... *wink to author* Suddenly, Kyoga fell backwards and his dick landed in a blender... A MAGIC BLENDER OF FRIENDSHIP! The magical friendship blender’s vagina swallowed Kyoga’s dick and teleported it into Emp’s ass. Emp was in his bedroom, sleeping, when he suddenly felt a strange sensation coming from the back of his pants. A strange protrusion was coming towards his butthole, and in less than a second, he found that he had a dick in his ass, waking him up, and startling the hell out of him. Emp used his wizard powers to pull it out, thus ripping off Kyoga’s dick. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAFGGGGGGOFFLURLUFJHF:IG:IUTI:UGFUDLTD:LUTLUTDLTUFLYTDLYTDFD#!@!%#!@#!@*%#@*@%$@%@%@#@#$%*(&^(^)*&)&_*_U!~!!!!!!!!!!!!” screamed Kyoga. He bled to death and died. “Oh no! What do we do?” said Applejack Rainbow dash entered a state of panic. “Quick, hide the body!” As Rainbow picked up Kyoga’s body, blood still streaming from the stump that once was his penis, she felt a warm breath on the back of her neck, and looked back to see Applejack right behind her, with a huge dick lined up with Rainbow Dash’s face. Surprised, Rainbow found herself frozen in place, unable to move as Applejack yelled out “SWAG!” and forced the penis into her throat. At first, Rainbow dash was all “WTF?!”, but then, as the phallus was rapidly thrusted in and out of her mouth, she began to enjoy it. Little did she know that Applejack was fucking her with the magical penis of the “Want-it, Need-it” spell. “Hey, I was just at this fun party and WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?” said Poinkie Pey. “Pinkie, help us with this.” Cupcakes were made. Suddenly, three police colts walked in. “You’re under arrest.” “Oh shit...” “Don’t you know weed possession is a crime.” “Oh thank god...” “We’re gonna have to punish you naughty mares.” The first officer grabbed the three mares and chained them to a wall. He also stuck vibrating bananas into their derp The second officer grabbed his dick and stuck it into one of the cupcakes. The third officer brandished his weapon of mass destruction, only to discover that it a detonated prematurely. The UN hosted an emergency discussion on the issue and it was agreed that the usage of nuclear weapons would only be validated in the act of self-defense. The officers hastily resumed bucking after that. Little did everyone know that it was not a weapon of mass destruction, but one of mass fornication. He thought it was a weapon of mass destruction, but turns out - it was a weapon of ASS destruction. “OH NO” Superderpy cries out, as she sees Doctor Whooves’ dick enter her ass. Superderpy and Doctor Whooves’ bodies drew closer together, caught in the heat of passion, their breaths intermingling in the cold frosty air. Suddenly, the Doctor stops. He leans closer into Derpy’s ear, desperate to whisper to her his dark secret. “Congratulations, you now have aids.” He kisses the mare on the cheek and promptly fucks off into the sunset, with his silhouette gradually fading into the horizon. The background orchestra begins playing Persis Overture as composed by James L Hosay, a moving piece based upon the upcoming of the persian empire. Meanwhile, Discord was having sex with Big Mac while he raped apple bloom. Little Strongheart was stalking Granny Smith, looking for a chance to engage her in anal tentacle sex. How? Magic. *snort snort* “eeyup” The red stallion remarks. “Are you trying to seduce me, Mr. Macintosh?” she responds. “Nope.” replied Big Mac. “I don’t know, I love all kinds of dicks!” Sweetie Belle announced. “There’s fresh dicks, stir-fried dicks, dicks scampi, dicks-and-cheese, box dicks, dicks-and-boxes, dick sandwiches, sweet and sour dicks, roasted dicks, barbequed dicks, boiled dicks, hard-boiled dicks, broiled dicks, baked dicks, dicks-ala-creme, dick fried rice, dicks with gravy, Fosdicks’s home for imaginary dicks, Dick surprise...that’s all I’ve got to say about that.” “Sweatie balle pls” said sctloo. (VERY ORIGINAL CHARACTER DO NOT STEAL) “All these namby-pamby dicks aren’t getting us any closer to our cutie dicks! Let’s go see if we can get Rainbow Dash’s dick! It’s bound to be awesome!” Unfortunately, the three dick crusaders were killed by a rampaging mutant vagina. “Wow, your vulvas are huge!” exclaimed Featherweight, the boy wonder, and 3M0-DJ. “Why thank you!” replied Big Mac. “EVERYTHING IS GOING ACCORDING TO PLAN WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” said an evil black silhouette behind a screen in the middle of nowhere. The evil villain behind all of this horrible sex then turned around into the light to be revealed as none other than Chromatic Chaos Pony. “Soon, all of the ponies in ponyville will have aids, and nobody will be able to stop me from writing tons of horrible sex-related fanfiction! DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!” “NOT IF I CAN HELP IT!” screamed the Mysterious Mare-do-it. “YOU MUST BE PUNISHED FOR YOUR CRIMES THROUGH EXTREME ORAL VAGINA SWIMMING” “CURSE YOU DICKFACE MARE-DO-ME! I WILL HAVE MY RAPEVENGE!” Suddenly, Bmo Thirteen came out of nowhere. “I’ll put a stop to this!” He moaned, taking out his bag of fully loaded BDSM machine guns. He charged at chromatic all guns blazing. Firing fleshlight bullets at 1,000,000 BPM. Unfortunately, Chromatic was able to skillfully dodge the fleshlight bullets, sending them directly at Jim. Jim was able to dodge the majority of them as well, but alas, one of them slid perfectly onto his dick, and started vibrating. Then Jim came on Chromatic and masterubated on everybody while listening to clopstep. “DAYUM JIM, YOUR SEMEN TASTES GOOD!” said Chromatic gleefully. “LOL I’M A HORSE, and I want KYOGA INSIDE OF ME”said Jim. Unfortunately, Kyoga died of severe ass-licking dickfuckery. So Jim cried, then masterubatted furriously, blinding Bmo with a shower of semen and causing him to stumble backwards onto a random landmine and exploding to death. “OH WUNDERBAR ALL THIS SEX IS SO IN FASHION NOWADAYS” Said Spike as he began to insert a book into his butthole. Twilight then walked in and pulled out her lady dick and jizzed on everybody. EVERYBODY CLAP YOUR HANDS *CLIP CLOP* *CLOPPIDY CLIP CLOP* (Secret Clopfic) OH WAIT WE HAVE HOOVES NOT HANDS DAMN IT! and then they all died. THE END (OH GOD WHY) 2. Where the madness is SpartaDramatic reading by Belgerum “WELCOME TO THE OLYMPIC ORAL VAGINA SWIMMING COMPETITION!” said LFP. YOUR A DICK LFP I AM NOT YOU ARE TOO GOD WE SUCK ASS LOL YEAH WE DO. “YAY” shouted Bmo. But then he remembered he had aids and was a zombie because he was dead. “LETS GET READY TO BUTTSEX” Yelled Kyoga’s disembodied zombie aids dick. “PREPARE FOR..... ZOMBIE AIDS!” Screeched Bmo, thrusting his 10 foot penis into Kyoga’s bloody dick. Fak u. Fak lal f “Belgerum... Why am I in this?” complained LFP, as he was ear raped by a neon green elephant OC and liked it. “Because you touch your dick at night to furry inflation porn.” Replied BMO, putting Kyogas disembodied penis on the end of his, and admiring the 4 foot extension. It was then that everyone realized that Kyoga’s dick was filled to the brim with explosives and grape jelly. It was also noted that BMO’s dick was covered in gasoline and butter, to make sliding in and out of the tight dick vagina easier than your mom on prom night. Unfortunately, all of this stupid penisfuckery angered the infamous god of dicks, Mike Hawk. “WHO DARES DISTURB MY SLUMBER” “Who?” asked Owlicious. “Yes, Who!” Replied Mike Hawk’s holy dick. Not receiving a straight answer, he got a gay one, inviting his friend Jack Hoff (The god of fapping) to help him punish the foolishly sexy, ass crazed mortals. So the two gods went off to have gay sex in the middle of the pacific ocean, leaving the mortal dicks to fuck each other to death in peace and tranquillity. However, all was not well. For the evil forces of sanity were rising up once more. It was at this time, that an ordinary man stood up for what he believed in, and set off on an epic quest to save the world. To counter the sanity, BMO immediately began to jack off, using Icy Hot as lube and spraying a can of chloroform into his nostrils for extra pleasure. But he was suddenly crushed by a 1,000 pound dick falling from the sky. The dick belonged to none other than a ponified version of Ash Ketchum, lord of the Balls. Meanwhile,in ponyville, Rarity was feeling left out. Nobody had written her into this fic yet, and she craved desperately for a vagina to stick in her dick. So what did she do? She committed suicide by stabbing herself in the armpit with Kyoga’s dick. Then, knowing the dick was filled with explosives and Grape Jelly, she lit a match and held it up to her beard. “FUFUFUFUFUFUFUGUFUFUFUFUFUFUFU!” said zombie killer Kyoga, waking up from the stimulation. “I shouldn't fap because you just twist my dicks into something random” said LFP, hoping to get some lovin’ from Princess Luna’s chin. “I shall fuck you, Belgerum.” “I would love that, dear friend.” responded Belgerum, a hint of seductiveness in his voice as he flung his arms around LFP, grabbing him into an embrace while allowing their lips to meet in a passionate kiss. As the two bodies met with emotions that neither knew they had for each other, LFP blushed as he felt his gigiga-penis go rigid between his legs, and poke the inside of his lover’s thighs. He looked into Belgerum’s eyes, as he grinned, guiding the head towards his lovingly moist vagina. Just before the moment of truth, where their passions would go aflame, and their love would take flight, LFP whispered into Belgerum’s ear, “YIFF IN HELL FURFAG!” Jim walked in and felt he needed to defecate in someone’s mouth. “Someone come here and open your mouth,” he said fervently. Luckily, a stray cat just happened to be walking by. Jim mistook it for a wild kyoga. He grabbed it with his thighs and ‘let loose’ all over the inside of its mouth. The cat was suddenly filled with the most rank diarrhea and promptly exploded, leaving its entrails all over the semen stained sidewalk. Jim was so sexually aroused by this that he began to lap up the mix of semen, cat entrails, and diarrhea off the sidewalk with a gusto never heard of before. Then he got sick and barfed all of it out again and spontaneously came. Green colored semen erupted from his now erect penis. Fortunately, Pyro was nearby, and killed it all with fire. Emp then ate a higgs boson and went to hell. “I’M A GAYFISH!” said kyoga as he fapped furiously to the two sexually arousing scenes unfolding before his very eyes. MÄYÖR MÄRE HÄD SEX WITH Ä TURTLE ÄND IT WAS GREÄT “PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS” “ENJOY” Then they all went to disney world. Belgerum went on the rollercoaster and died from all of the bloody knives swinging from the axes swinging from the roller coasters axes. Unfortunately for the world, his penis did not. The monster clown picked up Belgium's penis and began to chew on it thinking it was cotton candy, the penis was so red after all the damage it took on the roller coaster everyone thought it was cotton candy. After this horrible chain of events, Emp was left standing over a pile of cotton candy, which he mistook for Belgerum’s penis. He began putting the cotton candy into his butthole, imagining himself fucking Belgerum. Suddenly, Seth from EQD came into the fanfic. He immediately got tackled by a giant cyborg dick, and fucked hard by it and it’s twelve friends. The dicks were too big for Seth, and as he felt the first enter his vagina’s butthole, he could feel the head of the dick go so far into him, that it came back out his mouth. “I want to destroy your mana pool with my magic wand,” Seth whispered to Trixie, as his live feed was being uploaded to EQD at that very moment. Unfortunately, Trixie would not stand for it, and bitch-slapped him, and left him forever alone and a virgin. Meanwhile, everyone else was enjoying their sex lives. 3M0 DJ’s girlfriend walks in and they start goin’ at it on the floor. Hot hot hot. Unfortunately, Matthew N. and Derpy were having oral sex in the postal truck driving by. Distracted by the dick she was sucking, Derpy accidentally the delivery truck and drove through the wall of the house where 3M0 and his girlfriend were having sex. They were both flattened and died together under the truck. The impact of the truck also scared Derpy so much that she bit down on Matt’s penis. While Matt’s penis was as hard as steel, and could not be cut off by her teeth, it still hurt like hell, and Matt yelled loudly. Derpy just didn’t know what went wrong! All that blood, what had she done? Well, it was tasty anyway, so she ate her fill. She just couldn’t stop though, so her obsessive eating lead to her fattening up to the size of a whale. “I AM IRONMAN” Said Daring Do while being fucked up the ass by Reignboe Dash. “OMG HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE” said MY BUTT (who is best pony). “LOL” said Indigo Spectrum while holding a PENIS and poking everypony in the elbow. “OMG GAIZ KEEP IT TO PORN” said Chromatic Chaos Pony, who is not in this fic. Chromatic took his banhammer and shoved it up Belgerums anus, killing him in 5 years due to rectal cancer. It was then that Belgerum realized that life is precious while it lasts, and decided to spend the rest of his life fucking cartoon horse holograms. BUT WAIT THERES MORE. OXYCLEAN PENETRATES HARD TO REACH AREAS LIKE KYOGAS ASS, CUZ KYOGA WANTS TO BE IN THIS FIC SO BADLY. BUT THEN NICHOLAS CAGE RAPED JUSTIN BEIBER IN THE CAPS LOCK. (yay~) Unfortunately, he had aids. But nopony caught it because he used Scootaloo as a condom, thus earning her a cutie mark. ALL HAIL PLANKTON PARIS HILTON IS BEST DJ But then Celstia yelled out, “YO DAWG I HEARD YOU LIKE KYOGA SO WE PUT KYOGA IN THIS FIC SO YOU CAN RAPE KYOGA WHILE YOU RAPE KYOGA.” And then Kyoga was raped by everyone ever. And he drowned in bodily fluids. HOWEVER, KYOGA SURVIVED BY EVOLVING GILLS AND USING THEM TO BREATH IN ALL THE FLUIDS AND HE WAS LIKE “WTF INDIGO WHY DID YOU PUT ME IN THIS SHIT FANFIC. “I DUNNO LOL” HOLY SHIT! OUT OF NOWHERE CUMS SOUL-TENSION-BENJAMIN! “Yo Ben,” said Indigo. “Why does your name have to be so fucking long man.” Soul-fucking-tension-Goddamn-Benjamin responded, “HA FUCK YOU INDIGO IM ACTUALLY RAINBOW DASH!” said Rainbow-Dash-fucking-Soul-Tension-Benjamin Then Indigo’s head imploded into oblivion and Kyoga was happy because he thought this was the end of the chapter. But then everyone in Ponyville went up to Kyoga and starting raping him. He died in 10 years because he had contracted HIV. THE END 3. Where the madness has a penisDramatic reading by Belgerum PREFACE: So Lauren Faust was in a park. She was immediately raped by her fans. She received one sperm from each one and reached the pregnancy high score. “THIS IS BLASPHEMY, THIS IS MADNESS!” yelled the semen covered Faust. “NO! SPARTA WAS LAST CHAPTER” PENIS PENIS PENIS COCK PENIS DICK BALLS PENIS COCK ANUS ANUS KYOGAS PENIS RAPE CRUSH KILL DESTROY PENIS DICK PENIS PINGAS PENASUS COCK BALLS PENIS ANUS BONER PENIS PENIS BUTTHOLE PENIS BRONY. Swag. “You guys do know that I’m gonna read these, right?” Said the author. “Yes, we’re aware. :D” said everyone in the fic, subsequently breaking the fart wall. (READ IN BRITISH ACCENT:) “Fuck I just laughed so hard my penis flew out my nose.” (End British accent) PART 1: 2012 A SKRILLEX ODYSSEY Skrillex was sleeping with Kyoga and Artattack. There was no sex. They were just sleeping together. But then they all fucked in a brostep/clopstep ambient clusterfuck. Then they all sat down at skrillex’s macbook and raped it while Twilight Sparkle chewed on his FUCKING NOT CLASSY beaten headphone chord with her pony teeth. “YES OH MY GOD! YO SKRILL DROP IT HARD!” Yelled Skrilly, as he broke a sweat with his manly bangarang dick. (Skrillex is a girl) (we know) (fart wall). “CAN YOU FEEL THE ROUGH NECK BASS?!” He croaked with an air of modern talking. his hair waved back and forth like the fabled majestic sea-lion fuckface, as told within the ancient Nordic prophecies. Once exhausted of his magical dropping energy, Skrillex proceeded onto his next project. “Kyoga, say hello again, to ALL MY FRIENDS.” “Oh shit.” With that, a torrent of pubic parasprite lice in the image of Zecora burst forth with the ferocity of a thousand suns, charging towards Kyoga with a amazing grace and agility. “FUCK! CALL 911 NOW!” Kyoga screamed, as he became slowly devoured by the ferocious parasprite lice. It was almost noon by the time the lice had settled back into Skrillex’s "cinema". Surveying the wreckage around, Skrillex contemplated the trail of destruction he left behind. “Looks like,” he paused, reaching in his pubic triangle to retrieve his pair of sunglasses. He put on the sunglasses with an air of calm about him “Someone dropped the bass.” YEEEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH No one has entered the Devil’s Den since. Then Feed Me walked in and was like “oh hell no niggas, you don’t know clopstep!” he then turned into a pony and fed himself with his dubstep dickfuckery cock. PART 2: THE KYOGA BOSON “HEY GUYS YOU LIKE MY DICK ITS THE HIGGS BOSON HURR HURR HURR” said a very swaggish Belgerum. Little did everyone know that Belgerum’s dick was really Kyoga’s disembodied cock. Belgerum didn’t have a dick at all. He had a vagina. We interrupt this fanfic to bring you an important message from the science community. It was discovered today that Kyogas genitals ARE the missing mysterious god particle. Scientist say they are 99.6969% sure they have finally found them. However they say further tests are needed in order to be completely certain, but pop the bottles of champagnezee anyway. In other news, a gigantic penis is attacking the city. We bring you Dick Button live from the scene. “Thank you Tom, the situation is looking pretty grim... as you can see behind me, people are being killed numerous way, by being crushed, fucked to death, drowning in semen, and passing out from the stench. wait a minute... what’s that noise? OH MY GOD NO SPARE ME I HAVE A WIFE AN-“ “How much boson could a higgs boson boson if a boson could higg bosons? Indeed it will be forever a mystery,” Said the giant penis before destroying the camera. “Thank you, for that.... surprising report... and now the weather.” Best pony is best pony, Obviously. Best Pony should Pony The Best Pony’s Best pony, who Pony’d Best Pony who Best Pony’d Best Pony So anyway, there was a big explosion and the world went boom. But Equestria was fine cause its in an alternate universe. So everypony moved there and had a huuuuuuggeeee orgy. There were alicorn dicks flying into all kinds of alicorn vaginas. It was crazy. All the alicorns got fucked up the butt by Discords 1,000,000 studded dildos. Then they all died and Celestia hoof’d her clit up and made 1,000,000 more ponies. And that’s how Equestria was made. So then everyone was happy for a while and the 1,000,000 ponies fucked to make more ponies, raising the population to 2,000,001 ponies. The 2,000,001 ponies settled down in Equestria and started to grow potatos, which they then turned into “Absolute Everfree Vodka”. Fuck that was boring. PART 3: THE VAGINA MONOLOGUES Once upon a penis, in the magical magazine of Playpony, there were two regal hookers who had sex together, and created babies for all the land. To do this, the eldest used her alicorn hooker vagina to raise the penis at the stripper bars; the younger prepared her anus to begin the orgies. Thus, the two whores maintained balance for their kingdom and their male strippers, all the different types of penises. But as time went on, the younger whore became resentful. The penises relished and played in the vagina her elder sister opened, but shunned and looked over her beautiful anus. One fateful day, the younger whore refused to lower her anus onto a penis to make way for the orgy. The elder sister tried to fuck her, but the bitterness in the young one's heart had transformed her into a wicked virgin of darkness: Virginmare Moon. She vowed that she would curse the land with eternal blue balls. Reluctantly, the elder sister harnessed the most powerful magic known to whoredom: the Elements of Whore-money. Using the penis of the Elements of Whore-money, she raped her younger sister, and left her pregnant in the whorehouse. The elder sister took on responsibility for both pussy and ass, and Sex has been maintained in Playpony for generations since. Hmm... Elements of Whore-money. I know I've fucked those before... but where? My horny penis. My horny penis. penis penis penis penis PENIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS MY HORNY PENIS I USED TO WONDER WHAT A DICK COULD BE (My horny penis) UNTIL YOU ALL SHARED IT’S SEMEN WITH ME BIG PHALLUSES TONS OF COCKS A BEAUTIFUL DICK ROCK HARD AND STRONG SHARING SEMEN IT’S AN EASY FEAT AND STDS MAKE IT ALL COMPLETE (YOU HAVE MY) MY HORNY PENIS DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE ALL MY WILLING FUCK-FRIENDS FRIENDS FRIENDS FREI FREI FRIE FFFFFFFFF BWAHHH WUB WUB BUB BWAHHRRRR ZZZZZBUWBBBB GUAGWWUUBBBBGBRAWWWHHHSS POW POW POW BZZZWWORZOXOXTHSJK AZIKIAZIKAWAWAOW BAUZHUGAHHZHHHWOAW WUBWUBWUB ZIKASKAIWOWOWWWUB PENISES ARE MAGIC! SEMEN! 11/10 OmniWolfAttackS! Pro Swag! 720p! HD! WAV MP3 FREE DOWNLOAD! LINK IN THE DESCRIPTION! EPILOGUE: So I just walked into the living room and my mom and her friend were talking about their vaginas. :\ Cool story bro. THE END (Oh God Why) 4. Where the madness BADONKADONKSChapter 4: Where the madness BADONKADONKS. One day, Rarity and Fluttershy were BADONKADONKING in the woods with Spike and Rainbow Dash. This involved copious amounts of zap apple jam, which was provided by Applejack. “This BADONKADONK is simply the best!” Said Rarity, exhilarated. “Yeah! It’s the most radical BADONKADONK I ever had!” Rainbow Dash said. “Aww shucks guys,” Applejack responded as she blushed. “I really appreciate it! What do you think Fluttershy?” “It’s.... nice...” “Fluttershy. Don’t be rude. Tell Applejack what you really think.” “...Alright, since you really wanted to know.” Fluttershy took a deep breath. “I don’t like BADONKADONKING!” Her friends gasped. Fluttershy had always been willing to BADONKADONK with them. Even Spike had BADONKADONKED with her DICKBUTT on several occasions. “I’ve lied to you. I’m sorry... But what I really enjoy is FIRIN MAH DICK LAZAR BLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” “But darling! No one BADONKADONKS like you!” Rarity said urgently, greedy for another BADONKADONK. “You’re an animal when it comes to BADONKADONKING! You must continue! You must, you MUST, YOU MUST!” Rarity Flung herself at Fluttershy, hungry for more voluptuous BADONKADONKING. “You will BADONKADONK me right now!” She screamed. Fluttershy tried to flee, but Rarity was too quick for her. She pinned her down on the ground, forcing her giant BADONKADONK down on Fluttershy’s squirming body. “Oh rarity please... I just... oh my...” said Fluttershy nervously. She squeaked as the BADONKADONK approached its target. “BADONKADONK ME YOU DIRTY MARE!” Rarity howled at the top of her lungs, before forcing her BADONKADONK down on Fluttershys dick. Spike watched the developing scene with a mixture of disgust and confused arousal. He had never seen Rarity this eager for BADONKADONKING. Just as he was making up his mind about joining, he heard some noises behind him. He turned to see by Rainbow Dash and Applejack BADONKADONKING one another like they were the last mares in Equestria. Enveloped in one anothers BADONKADONKING, they hardly noticed Spike as he whipped out his BADONKADONK and fucked himself. THEN BELGERUM RUINED ALL the FUN! A LAZER WAS FIRED! CUM WAS SHOT! POO WAS FLUNG! SHIT HIT THE FAN! RAINBOW DASH’S ASS EXPLODED! THEN THERE WAS BLOOD! AND DEATH BY DRAGONS! BELGERUM WAS THERE! HE SAW EVERYTHING! HE LIKED EVERYTHING! EVERY! SINGLE! THING! ALL THE SHIT! ALL THE BADONKADONKS THAT FELL FROM THE SKY BECAUSE LUNA IS STILL A VIRGIN! LIKE A 1000 YEAR OLD VIRGIN. Time to grind! Gain some levels! Fight the boss. Get powerups! Save the princess! (Luna that is) Then fuck her, so she’s no longer a virgin anymore. YO DAWG I HEARD YOU LIKE PONIES SO WE PUT A PONY IN A PONY SO YOU CAN CLOP WHILE YOU PONY ON YOUR PONY! What the dick did I just read? *ClopClopClop* *SchluckSchluck* When Flutters saw the scope of Rarity’s dick while she was laying on her bed, she couldn’t help but take advantage of the opportunity. She raped rarity and Rarity died and Fluttershy was all like LOL. Meanwhile, Spike was looking in through a window, watching the two have HOT SEX. He was mad that Fluttershy killed Rarity, because she was his waifu. He got revenge by murdering Fluttershy’s animal friends, and raping their dead bodies with his 50 foot long magical dragon cock. After Flutterbuttershy left the scene of the crime, the air cooled, preserving Elusive’s organs for a few hours longer than what thought possible. HOLY SHIT TARA STRONG CAME OUT OF RARITY’S COLD DEAD PONY VAGINA. TWILOT SPAWKLE came in and FUCKED INDAGO SPACTRUM saved Elusive’s life, destroying the Elements of Harmony with her kinky buttsecks. Then she put on some hot socks and it was good. It was good x 2 “I LIKE TRAINS,” said Mr. Dick, as he flung himself towards the dickway. This wasn’t the first time this had happened, and fortunately Mrs. Dick was feeling extra deviant, and dickfucked him right then and there over the dickway. After she came in him twice, she felt the need to slit his dick then and there. This turned her on even more, and she had kinky sex with his bloated dick (because he had eaten like six hundred parasprites while saving Equestria like seven hundred times the night before). Then, they went home and she threw his corpse in the refrigerator, keeping the smell at bay for a few hours. Then she had sex with his bloated dead dick again. It was hot. COCKS. WINTER FUCK UP WINTER FUCK UP, LET’S FINISH OUR HOLIDAY CHEER WINTER FUCK UP WINTER FUCK UP CAUSE TOMORROW SPRING HEAT’S HERE CAUSE TOMORROW SPRING HEAT’S HERE BRINGING UP THE SOUTHERN DICKS A HUGE BLOWJOB BEGINS AND TAKING OFF THE WET PANTIES TO LET THE PENIS IN WE MOVE THE DICK AND THEN WE PENETRATE HER WHEN THE SUN COMES UP IT’S COCK AND BUTT WILL SHOW YEAH LEGION LIKES ASIAN COCK NUUOOOO BELGERUM WHYYYYY BECAUSE PENIS NI HAO CHING CHANG CHONG SCHLUCK SCHLUCK SCHLUCK OKAY. my daddy makes me put glass in my BADONKADONK Good for you. THE END! (Oh God Why)
1. Where the madness startsBonus Dramatic Reading by Belgerum INB4 A CLOPFIC. whoops..... Once upon a time, Rainbow Dash was eating apples at Sugarcube Corner, when suddenly, “KABLAM!” (was a great show) IT WAS TRIXIE!!!!!! “AH SHIT I FUCKED TRIXIE” said Twilight Sparkle “Penis penis penis” said Trixie in response, while sucking rule 63 Kyoga’s dick. (because he was definitely there.) Indeed, they were Futas... “Why am I in this again?” groaned Kyoga. Kyoga’s words then began to fall apart as his speech was impeded by his moans of pleasure. The sensations of pleasure going through his dick felt so good, as Trixies fapulously moist saliva covered his 4 foot long penis. “Sup niggas?” asked Chromatic, who now has swag. He was immediately tackled by Lyra, who began rapidly humping his ear. Chromatic decided it would be best to remain out of the fanfiction due to the result of his previous writings. But nooo, someone had to put him back in the fic... *wink to author* Suddenly, Kyoga fell backwards and his dick landed in a blender... A MAGIC BLENDER OF FRIENDSHIP! The magical friendship blender’s vagina swallowed Kyoga’s dick and teleported it into Emp’s ass. Emp was in his bedroom, sleeping, when he suddenly felt a strange sensation coming from the back of his pants. A strange protrusion was coming towards his butthole, and in less than a second, he found that he had a dick in his ass, waking him up, and startling the hell out of him. Emp used his wizard powers to pull it out, thus ripping off Kyoga’s dick. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAFGGGGGGOFFLURLUFJHF:IG:IUTI:UGFUDLTD:LUTLUTDLTUFLYTDLYTDFD#!@!%#!@#!@*%#@*@%$@%@%@#@#$%*(&^(^)*&)&_*_U!~!!!!!!!!!!!!” screamed Kyoga. He bled to death and died. “Oh no! What do we do?” said Applejack Rainbow dash entered a state of panic. “Quick, hide the body!” As Rainbow picked up Kyoga’s body, blood still streaming from the stump that once was his penis, she felt a warm breath on the back of her neck, and looked back to see Applejack right behind her, with a huge dick lined up with Rainbow Dash’s face. Surprised, Rainbow found herself frozen in place, unable to move as Applejack yelled out “SWAG!” and forced the penis into her throat. At first, Rainbow dash was all “WTF?!”, but then, as the phallus was rapidly thrusted in and out of her mouth, she began to enjoy it. Little did she know that Applejack was fucking her with the magical penis of the “Want-it, Need-it” spell. “Hey, I was just at this fun party and WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?” said Poinkie Pey. “Pinkie, help us with this.” Cupcakes were made. Suddenly, three police colts walked in. “You’re under arrest.” “Oh shit...” “Don’t you know weed possession is a crime.” “Oh thank god...” “We’re gonna have to punish you naughty mares.” The first officer grabbed the three mares and chained them to a wall. He also stuck vibrating bananas into their derp The second officer grabbed his dick and stuck it into one of the cupcakes. The third officer brandished his weapon of mass destruction, only to discover that it a detonated prematurely. The UN hosted an emergency discussion on the issue and it was agreed that the usage of nuclear weapons would only be validated in the act of self-defense. The officers hastily resumed bucking after that. Little did everyone know that it was not a weapon of mass destruction, but one of mass fornication. He thought it was a weapon of mass destruction, but turns out - it was a weapon of ASS destruction. “OH NO” Superderpy cries out, as she sees Doctor Whooves’ dick enter her ass. Superderpy and Doctor Whooves’ bodies drew closer together, caught in the heat of passion, their breaths intermingling in the cold frosty air. Suddenly, the Doctor stops. He leans closer into Derpy’s ear, desperate to whisper to her his dark secret. “Congratulations, you now have aids.” He kisses the mare on the cheek and promptly fucks off into the sunset, with his silhouette gradually fading into the horizon. The background orchestra begins playing Persis Overture as composed by James L Hosay, a moving piece based upon the upcoming of the persian empire. Meanwhile, Discord was having sex with Big Mac while he raped apple bloom. Little Strongheart was stalking Granny Smith, looking for a chance to engage her in anal tentacle sex. How? Magic. *snort snort* “eeyup” The red stallion remarks. “Are you trying to seduce me, Mr. Macintosh?” she responds. “Nope.” replied Big Mac. “I don’t know, I love all kinds of dicks!” Sweetie Belle announced. “There’s fresh dicks, stir-fried dicks, dicks scampi, dicks-and-cheese, box dicks, dicks-and-boxes, dick sandwiches, sweet and sour dicks, roasted dicks, barbequed dicks, boiled dicks, hard-boiled dicks, broiled dicks, baked dicks, dicks-ala-creme, dick fried rice, dicks with gravy, Fosdicks’s home for imaginary dicks, Dick surprise...that’s all I’ve got to say about that.” “Sweatie balle pls” said sctloo. (VERY ORIGINAL CHARACTER DO NOT STEAL) “All these namby-pamby dicks aren’t getting us any closer to our cutie dicks! Let’s go see if we can get Rainbow Dash’s dick! It’s bound to be awesome!” Unfortunately, the three dick crusaders were killed by a rampaging mutant vagina. “Wow, your vulvas are huge!” exclaimed Featherweight, the boy wonder, and 3M0-DJ. “Why thank you!” replied Big Mac. “EVERYTHING IS GOING ACCORDING TO PLAN WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” said an evil black silhouette behind a screen in the middle of nowhere. The evil villain behind all of this horrible sex then turned around into the light to be revealed as none other than Chromatic Chaos Pony. “Soon, all of the ponies in ponyville will have aids, and nobody will be able to stop me from writing tons of horrible sex-related fanfiction! DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!” “NOT IF I CAN HELP IT!” screamed the Mysterious Mare-do-it. “YOU MUST BE PUNISHED FOR YOUR CRIMES THROUGH EXTREME ORAL VAGINA SWIMMING” “CURSE YOU DICKFACE MARE-DO-ME! I WILL HAVE MY RAPEVENGE!” Suddenly, Bmo Thirteen came out of nowhere. “I’ll put a stop to this!” He moaned, taking out his bag of fully loaded BDSM machine guns. He charged at chromatic all guns blazing. Firing fleshlight bullets at 1,000,000 BPM. Unfortunately, Chromatic was able to skillfully dodge the fleshlight bullets, sending them directly at Jim. Jim was able to dodge the majority of them as well, but alas, one of them slid perfectly onto his dick, and started vibrating. Then Jim came on Chromatic and masterubated on everybody while listening to clopstep. “DAYUM JIM, YOUR SEMEN TASTES GOOD!” said Chromatic gleefully. “LOL I’M A HORSE, and I want KYOGA INSIDE OF ME”said Jim. Unfortunately, Kyoga died of severe ass-licking dickfuckery. So Jim cried, then masterubatted furriously, blinding Bmo with a shower of semen and causing him to stumble backwards onto a random landmine and exploding to death. “OH WUNDERBAR ALL THIS SEX IS SO IN FASHION NOWADAYS” Said Spike as he began to insert a book into his butthole. Twilight then walked in and pulled out her lady dick and jizzed on everybody. EVERYBODY CLAP YOUR HANDS *CLIP CLOP* *CLOPPIDY CLIP CLOP* (Secret Clopfic) OH WAIT WE HAVE HOOVES NOT HANDS DAMN IT! and then they all died. THE END (OH GOD WHY)
2. Where the madness is SpartaDramatic reading by Belgerum “WELCOME TO THE OLYMPIC ORAL VAGINA SWIMMING COMPETITION!” said LFP. YOUR A DICK LFP I AM NOT YOU ARE TOO GOD WE SUCK ASS LOL YEAH WE DO. “YAY” shouted Bmo. But then he remembered he had aids and was a zombie because he was dead. “LETS GET READY TO BUTTSEX” Yelled Kyoga’s disembodied zombie aids dick. “PREPARE FOR..... ZOMBIE AIDS!” Screeched Bmo, thrusting his 10 foot penis into Kyoga’s bloody dick. Fak u. Fak lal f “Belgerum... Why am I in this?” complained LFP, as he was ear raped by a neon green elephant OC and liked it. “Because you touch your dick at night to furry inflation porn.” Replied BMO, putting Kyogas disembodied penis on the end of his, and admiring the 4 foot extension. It was then that everyone realized that Kyoga’s dick was filled to the brim with explosives and grape jelly. It was also noted that BMO’s dick was covered in gasoline and butter, to make sliding in and out of the tight dick vagina easier than your mom on prom night. Unfortunately, all of this stupid penisfuckery angered the infamous god of dicks, Mike Hawk. “WHO DARES DISTURB MY SLUMBER” “Who?” asked Owlicious. “Yes, Who!” Replied Mike Hawk’s holy dick. Not receiving a straight answer, he got a gay one, inviting his friend Jack Hoff (The god of fapping) to help him punish the foolishly sexy, ass crazed mortals. So the two gods went off to have gay sex in the middle of the pacific ocean, leaving the mortal dicks to fuck each other to death in peace and tranquillity. However, all was not well. For the evil forces of sanity were rising up once more. It was at this time, that an ordinary man stood up for what he believed in, and set off on an epic quest to save the world. To counter the sanity, BMO immediately began to jack off, using Icy Hot as lube and spraying a can of chloroform into his nostrils for extra pleasure. But he was suddenly crushed by a 1,000 pound dick falling from the sky. The dick belonged to none other than a ponified version of Ash Ketchum, lord of the Balls. Meanwhile,in ponyville, Rarity was feeling left out. Nobody had written her into this fic yet, and she craved desperately for a vagina to stick in her dick. So what did she do? She committed suicide by stabbing herself in the armpit with Kyoga’s dick. Then, knowing the dick was filled with explosives and Grape Jelly, she lit a match and held it up to her beard. “FUFUFUFUFUFUFUGUFUFUFUFUFUFUFU!” said zombie killer Kyoga, waking up from the stimulation. “I shouldn't fap because you just twist my dicks into something random” said LFP, hoping to get some lovin’ from Princess Luna’s chin. “I shall fuck you, Belgerum.” “I would love that, dear friend.” responded Belgerum, a hint of seductiveness in his voice as he flung his arms around LFP, grabbing him into an embrace while allowing their lips to meet in a passionate kiss. As the two bodies met with emotions that neither knew they had for each other, LFP blushed as he felt his gigiga-penis go rigid between his legs, and poke the inside of his lover’s thighs. He looked into Belgerum’s eyes, as he grinned, guiding the head towards his lovingly moist vagina. Just before the moment of truth, where their passions would go aflame, and their love would take flight, LFP whispered into Belgerum’s ear, “YIFF IN HELL FURFAG!” Jim walked in and felt he needed to defecate in someone’s mouth. “Someone come here and open your mouth,” he said fervently. Luckily, a stray cat just happened to be walking by. Jim mistook it for a wild kyoga. He grabbed it with his thighs and ‘let loose’ all over the inside of its mouth. The cat was suddenly filled with the most rank diarrhea and promptly exploded, leaving its entrails all over the semen stained sidewalk. Jim was so sexually aroused by this that he began to lap up the mix of semen, cat entrails, and diarrhea off the sidewalk with a gusto never heard of before. Then he got sick and barfed all of it out again and spontaneously came. Green colored semen erupted from his now erect penis. Fortunately, Pyro was nearby, and killed it all with fire. Emp then ate a higgs boson and went to hell. “I’M A GAYFISH!” said kyoga as he fapped furiously to the two sexually arousing scenes unfolding before his very eyes. MÄYÖR MÄRE HÄD SEX WITH Ä TURTLE ÄND IT WAS GREÄT “PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS” “ENJOY” Then they all went to disney world. Belgerum went on the rollercoaster and died from all of the bloody knives swinging from the axes swinging from the roller coasters axes. Unfortunately for the world, his penis did not. The monster clown picked up Belgium's penis and began to chew on it thinking it was cotton candy, the penis was so red after all the damage it took on the roller coaster everyone thought it was cotton candy. After this horrible chain of events, Emp was left standing over a pile of cotton candy, which he mistook for Belgerum’s penis. He began putting the cotton candy into his butthole, imagining himself fucking Belgerum. Suddenly, Seth from EQD came into the fanfic. He immediately got tackled by a giant cyborg dick, and fucked hard by it and it’s twelve friends. The dicks were too big for Seth, and as he felt the first enter his vagina’s butthole, he could feel the head of the dick go so far into him, that it came back out his mouth. “I want to destroy your mana pool with my magic wand,” Seth whispered to Trixie, as his live feed was being uploaded to EQD at that very moment. Unfortunately, Trixie would not stand for it, and bitch-slapped him, and left him forever alone and a virgin. Meanwhile, everyone else was enjoying their sex lives. 3M0 DJ’s girlfriend walks in and they start goin’ at it on the floor. Hot hot hot. Unfortunately, Matthew N. and Derpy were having oral sex in the postal truck driving by. Distracted by the dick she was sucking, Derpy accidentally the delivery truck and drove through the wall of the house where 3M0 and his girlfriend were having sex. They were both flattened and died together under the truck. The impact of the truck also scared Derpy so much that she bit down on Matt’s penis. While Matt’s penis was as hard as steel, and could not be cut off by her teeth, it still hurt like hell, and Matt yelled loudly. Derpy just didn’t know what went wrong! All that blood, what had she done? Well, it was tasty anyway, so she ate her fill. She just couldn’t stop though, so her obsessive eating lead to her fattening up to the size of a whale. “I AM IRONMAN” Said Daring Do while being fucked up the ass by Reignboe Dash. “OMG HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE” said MY BUTT (who is best pony). “LOL” said Indigo Spectrum while holding a PENIS and poking everypony in the elbow. “OMG GAIZ KEEP IT TO PORN” said Chromatic Chaos Pony, who is not in this fic. Chromatic took his banhammer and shoved it up Belgerums anus, killing him in 5 years due to rectal cancer. It was then that Belgerum realized that life is precious while it lasts, and decided to spend the rest of his life fucking cartoon horse holograms. BUT WAIT THERES MORE. OXYCLEAN PENETRATES HARD TO REACH AREAS LIKE KYOGAS ASS, CUZ KYOGA WANTS TO BE IN THIS FIC SO BADLY. BUT THEN NICHOLAS CAGE RAPED JUSTIN BEIBER IN THE CAPS LOCK. (yay~) Unfortunately, he had aids. But nopony caught it because he used Scootaloo as a condom, thus earning her a cutie mark. ALL HAIL PLANKTON PARIS HILTON IS BEST DJ But then Celstia yelled out, “YO DAWG I HEARD YOU LIKE KYOGA SO WE PUT KYOGA IN THIS FIC SO YOU CAN RAPE KYOGA WHILE YOU RAPE KYOGA.” And then Kyoga was raped by everyone ever. And he drowned in bodily fluids. HOWEVER, KYOGA SURVIVED BY EVOLVING GILLS AND USING THEM TO BREATH IN ALL THE FLUIDS AND HE WAS LIKE “WTF INDIGO WHY DID YOU PUT ME IN THIS SHIT FANFIC. “I DUNNO LOL” HOLY SHIT! OUT OF NOWHERE CUMS SOUL-TENSION-BENJAMIN! “Yo Ben,” said Indigo. “Why does your name have to be so fucking long man.” Soul-fucking-tension-Goddamn-Benjamin responded, “HA FUCK YOU INDIGO IM ACTUALLY RAINBOW DASH!” said Rainbow-Dash-fucking-Soul-Tension-Benjamin Then Indigo’s head imploded into oblivion and Kyoga was happy because he thought this was the end of the chapter. But then everyone in Ponyville went up to Kyoga and starting raping him. He died in 10 years because he had contracted HIV. THE END
3. Where the madness has a penisDramatic reading by Belgerum PREFACE: So Lauren Faust was in a park. She was immediately raped by her fans. She received one sperm from each one and reached the pregnancy high score. “THIS IS BLASPHEMY, THIS IS MADNESS!” yelled the semen covered Faust. “NO! SPARTA WAS LAST CHAPTER” PENIS PENIS PENIS COCK PENIS DICK BALLS PENIS COCK ANUS ANUS KYOGAS PENIS RAPE CRUSH KILL DESTROY PENIS DICK PENIS PINGAS PENASUS COCK BALLS PENIS ANUS BONER PENIS PENIS BUTTHOLE PENIS BRONY. Swag. “You guys do know that I’m gonna read these, right?” Said the author. “Yes, we’re aware. :D” said everyone in the fic, subsequently breaking the fart wall. (READ IN BRITISH ACCENT:) “Fuck I just laughed so hard my penis flew out my nose.” (End British accent) PART 1: 2012 A SKRILLEX ODYSSEY Skrillex was sleeping with Kyoga and Artattack. There was no sex. They were just sleeping together. But then they all fucked in a brostep/clopstep ambient clusterfuck. Then they all sat down at skrillex’s macbook and raped it while Twilight Sparkle chewed on his FUCKING NOT CLASSY beaten headphone chord with her pony teeth. “YES OH MY GOD! YO SKRILL DROP IT HARD!” Yelled Skrilly, as he broke a sweat with his manly bangarang dick. (Skrillex is a girl) (we know) (fart wall). “CAN YOU FEEL THE ROUGH NECK BASS?!” He croaked with an air of modern talking. his hair waved back and forth like the fabled majestic sea-lion fuckface, as told within the ancient Nordic prophecies. Once exhausted of his magical dropping energy, Skrillex proceeded onto his next project. “Kyoga, say hello again, to ALL MY FRIENDS.” “Oh shit.” With that, a torrent of pubic parasprite lice in the image of Zecora burst forth with the ferocity of a thousand suns, charging towards Kyoga with a amazing grace and agility. “FUCK! CALL 911 NOW!” Kyoga screamed, as he became slowly devoured by the ferocious parasprite lice. It was almost noon by the time the lice had settled back into Skrillex’s "cinema". Surveying the wreckage around, Skrillex contemplated the trail of destruction he left behind. “Looks like,” he paused, reaching in his pubic triangle to retrieve his pair of sunglasses. He put on the sunglasses with an air of calm about him “Someone dropped the bass.” YEEEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH No one has entered the Devil’s Den since. Then Feed Me walked in and was like “oh hell no niggas, you don’t know clopstep!” he then turned into a pony and fed himself with his dubstep dickfuckery cock. PART 2: THE KYOGA BOSON “HEY GUYS YOU LIKE MY DICK ITS THE HIGGS BOSON HURR HURR HURR” said a very swaggish Belgerum. Little did everyone know that Belgerum’s dick was really Kyoga’s disembodied cock. Belgerum didn’t have a dick at all. He had a vagina. We interrupt this fanfic to bring you an important message from the science community. It was discovered today that Kyogas genitals ARE the missing mysterious god particle. Scientist say they are 99.6969% sure they have finally found them. However they say further tests are needed in order to be completely certain, but pop the bottles of champagnezee anyway. In other news, a gigantic penis is attacking the city. We bring you Dick Button live from the scene. “Thank you Tom, the situation is looking pretty grim... as you can see behind me, people are being killed numerous way, by being crushed, fucked to death, drowning in semen, and passing out from the stench. wait a minute... what’s that noise? OH MY GOD NO SPARE ME I HAVE A WIFE AN-“ “How much boson could a higgs boson boson if a boson could higg bosons? Indeed it will be forever a mystery,” Said the giant penis before destroying the camera. “Thank you, for that.... surprising report... and now the weather.” Best pony is best pony, Obviously. Best Pony should Pony The Best Pony’s Best pony, who Pony’d Best Pony who Best Pony’d Best Pony So anyway, there was a big explosion and the world went boom. But Equestria was fine cause its in an alternate universe. So everypony moved there and had a huuuuuuggeeee orgy. There were alicorn dicks flying into all kinds of alicorn vaginas. It was crazy. All the alicorns got fucked up the butt by Discords 1,000,000 studded dildos. Then they all died and Celestia hoof’d her clit up and made 1,000,000 more ponies. And that’s how Equestria was made. So then everyone was happy for a while and the 1,000,000 ponies fucked to make more ponies, raising the population to 2,000,001 ponies. The 2,000,001 ponies settled down in Equestria and started to grow potatos, which they then turned into “Absolute Everfree Vodka”. Fuck that was boring. PART 3: THE VAGINA MONOLOGUES Once upon a penis, in the magical magazine of Playpony, there were two regal hookers who had sex together, and created babies for all the land. To do this, the eldest used her alicorn hooker vagina to raise the penis at the stripper bars; the younger prepared her anus to begin the orgies. Thus, the two whores maintained balance for their kingdom and their male strippers, all the different types of penises. But as time went on, the younger whore became resentful. The penises relished and played in the vagina her elder sister opened, but shunned and looked over her beautiful anus. One fateful day, the younger whore refused to lower her anus onto a penis to make way for the orgy. The elder sister tried to fuck her, but the bitterness in the young one's heart had transformed her into a wicked virgin of darkness: Virginmare Moon. She vowed that she would curse the land with eternal blue balls. Reluctantly, the elder sister harnessed the most powerful magic known to whoredom: the Elements of Whore-money. Using the penis of the Elements of Whore-money, she raped her younger sister, and left her pregnant in the whorehouse. The elder sister took on responsibility for both pussy and ass, and Sex has been maintained in Playpony for generations since. Hmm... Elements of Whore-money. I know I've fucked those before... but where? My horny penis. My horny penis. penis penis penis penis PENIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS MY HORNY PENIS I USED TO WONDER WHAT A DICK COULD BE (My horny penis) UNTIL YOU ALL SHARED IT’S SEMEN WITH ME BIG PHALLUSES TONS OF COCKS A BEAUTIFUL DICK ROCK HARD AND STRONG SHARING SEMEN IT’S AN EASY FEAT AND STDS MAKE IT ALL COMPLETE (YOU HAVE MY) MY HORNY PENIS DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE ALL MY WILLING FUCK-FRIENDS FRIENDS FRIENDS FREI FREI FRIE FFFFFFFFF BWAHHH WUB WUB BUB BWAHHRRRR ZZZZZBUWBBBB GUAGWWUUBBBBGBRAWWWHHHSS POW POW POW BZZZWWORZOXOXTHSJK AZIKIAZIKAWAWAOW BAUZHUGAHHZHHHWOAW WUBWUBWUB ZIKASKAIWOWOWWWUB PENISES ARE MAGIC! SEMEN! 11/10 OmniWolfAttackS! Pro Swag! 720p! HD! WAV MP3 FREE DOWNLOAD! LINK IN THE DESCRIPTION! EPILOGUE: So I just walked into the living room and my mom and her friend were talking about their vaginas. :\ Cool story bro. THE END (Oh God Why)
4. Where the madness BADONKADONKSChapter 4: Where the madness BADONKADONKS. One day, Rarity and Fluttershy were BADONKADONKING in the woods with Spike and Rainbow Dash. This involved copious amounts of zap apple jam, which was provided by Applejack. “This BADONKADONK is simply the best!” Said Rarity, exhilarated. “Yeah! It’s the most radical BADONKADONK I ever had!” Rainbow Dash said. “Aww shucks guys,” Applejack responded as she blushed. “I really appreciate it! What do you think Fluttershy?” “It’s.... nice...” “Fluttershy. Don’t be rude. Tell Applejack what you really think.” “...Alright, since you really wanted to know.” Fluttershy took a deep breath. “I don’t like BADONKADONKING!” Her friends gasped. Fluttershy had always been willing to BADONKADONK with them. Even Spike had BADONKADONKED with her DICKBUTT on several occasions. “I’ve lied to you. I’m sorry... But what I really enjoy is FIRIN MAH DICK LAZAR BLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” “But darling! No one BADONKADONKS like you!” Rarity said urgently, greedy for another BADONKADONK. “You’re an animal when it comes to BADONKADONKING! You must continue! You must, you MUST, YOU MUST!” Rarity Flung herself at Fluttershy, hungry for more voluptuous BADONKADONKING. “You will BADONKADONK me right now!” She screamed. Fluttershy tried to flee, but Rarity was too quick for her. She pinned her down on the ground, forcing her giant BADONKADONK down on Fluttershy’s squirming body. “Oh rarity please... I just... oh my...” said Fluttershy nervously. She squeaked as the BADONKADONK approached its target. “BADONKADONK ME YOU DIRTY MARE!” Rarity howled at the top of her lungs, before forcing her BADONKADONK down on Fluttershys dick. Spike watched the developing scene with a mixture of disgust and confused arousal. He had never seen Rarity this eager for BADONKADONKING. Just as he was making up his mind about joining, he heard some noises behind him. He turned to see by Rainbow Dash and Applejack BADONKADONKING one another like they were the last mares in Equestria. Enveloped in one anothers BADONKADONKING, they hardly noticed Spike as he whipped out his BADONKADONK and fucked himself. THEN BELGERUM RUINED ALL the FUN! A LAZER WAS FIRED! CUM WAS SHOT! POO WAS FLUNG! SHIT HIT THE FAN! RAINBOW DASH’S ASS EXPLODED! THEN THERE WAS BLOOD! AND DEATH BY DRAGONS! BELGERUM WAS THERE! HE SAW EVERYTHING! HE LIKED EVERYTHING! EVERY! SINGLE! THING! ALL THE SHIT! ALL THE BADONKADONKS THAT FELL FROM THE SKY BECAUSE LUNA IS STILL A VIRGIN! LIKE A 1000 YEAR OLD VIRGIN. Time to grind! Gain some levels! Fight the boss. Get powerups! Save the princess! (Luna that is) Then fuck her, so she’s no longer a virgin anymore. YO DAWG I HEARD YOU LIKE PONIES SO WE PUT A PONY IN A PONY SO YOU CAN CLOP WHILE YOU PONY ON YOUR PONY! What the dick did I just read? *ClopClopClop* *SchluckSchluck* When Flutters saw the scope of Rarity’s dick while she was laying on her bed, she couldn’t help but take advantage of the opportunity. She raped rarity and Rarity died and Fluttershy was all like LOL. Meanwhile, Spike was looking in through a window, watching the two have HOT SEX. He was mad that Fluttershy killed Rarity, because she was his waifu. He got revenge by murdering Fluttershy’s animal friends, and raping their dead bodies with his 50 foot long magical dragon cock. After Flutterbuttershy left the scene of the crime, the air cooled, preserving Elusive’s organs for a few hours longer than what thought possible. HOLY SHIT TARA STRONG CAME OUT OF RARITY’S COLD DEAD PONY VAGINA. TWILOT SPAWKLE came in and FUCKED INDAGO SPACTRUM saved Elusive’s life, destroying the Elements of Harmony with her kinky buttsecks. Then she put on some hot socks and it was good. It was good x 2 “I LIKE TRAINS,” said Mr. Dick, as he flung himself towards the dickway. This wasn’t the first time this had happened, and fortunately Mrs. Dick was feeling extra deviant, and dickfucked him right then and there over the dickway. After she came in him twice, she felt the need to slit his dick then and there. This turned her on even more, and she had kinky sex with his bloated dick (because he had eaten like six hundred parasprites while saving Equestria like seven hundred times the night before). Then, they went home and she threw his corpse in the refrigerator, keeping the smell at bay for a few hours. Then she had sex with his bloated dead dick again. It was hot. COCKS. WINTER FUCK UP WINTER FUCK UP, LET’S FINISH OUR HOLIDAY CHEER WINTER FUCK UP WINTER FUCK UP CAUSE TOMORROW SPRING HEAT’S HERE CAUSE TOMORROW SPRING HEAT’S HERE BRINGING UP THE SOUTHERN DICKS A HUGE BLOWJOB BEGINS AND TAKING OFF THE WET PANTIES TO LET THE PENIS IN WE MOVE THE DICK AND THEN WE PENETRATE HER WHEN THE SUN COMES UP IT’S COCK AND BUTT WILL SHOW YEAH LEGION LIKES ASIAN COCK NUUOOOO BELGERUM WHYYYYY BECAUSE PENIS NI HAO CHING CHANG CHONG SCHLUCK SCHLUCK SCHLUCK OKAY. my daddy makes me put glass in my BADONKADONK Good for you. THE END! (Oh God Why)
