The Coversion bureau: Parting Shot

by AShadyDetective

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Original Character, Comedy
Length: 1341

We may have been sent running, but we aren't going anywhere without delivering our parting shot

We were sent packing, no better way to say it, we ran with our tail between our legs, and now with some of us sent into space and the rest dead from suicide, it's up to me to be the one guy who delivers the last shot, this is our goodbye, our parting shot.

(A conversion bureau story)

Published 2017-01-23 02:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-01-23 02:20:01 UTC

Parting Shot

It started five years ago, portals started opening up and of all things ponies started coming out. Human did not make a good first impression, as they started moving to talk to some of us we attacked, we were scared, this deviated from the normal, a total of seven ponies were killed before people came to their senses.

Their leaders, princesses apparently were furious at first, they pulled all ponies out through the portals proclaiming vengeance for the lives lost, she gave us a warning, that was her first mistake.

When they returned we were ready, we had prepared ourselves for anything. We sent ambassadors to them with hopes of a peaceful solution doubting it would work. We were surprised when the ambassadors came back with good news claiming the princesses forgave us and acknowledged that it was a honest mistake. We were ecstatic but still we kept our guard.

That was when the conversion bureau's had opened up, after all the peace talks the ponies claimed that it would be a way of interspecies mingling, humans into ponies and ponies into humans. Only two ponies ever became humans.

There was a sudden year long craze for conversion, it became a worldwide phenomenon, people were being converted in the thousands. Due to this demand the "barriers" were made. Walls of pink that all a person had to do was walk into it and they would be converted.

But eventually people started noticing things, converted family members stopped writing, they all moved to Equestria claiming it "felt better". It slowly got worse, the new-foals (a coined term) seemed almost lobotomized, converted parents started strong arming kids and partners into converting.

Regardless of the past people started noticing, and the craze for conversion died down to the point where bureau's were being shut down due to inactivity, although people also noticed that the barriers stayed where they were, there were some reports of people claiming that the barrier was inching outward.

If only we had listened to those reports. Finally when the stubborn part of humanity remained on earth the princesses came onto all channels of media, they were claiming stuff about how humanity was unfit to be left to their own devices, they claimed if we did not accept our salvation willingly then we left them no choice. Suddenly across the globe the Barrie's shot outward some at the speeds of 40 mph while some just moved a foot and hour.

People noticed this and panicked, some tried to break the barrier with impressive shows of artillery while others simply ran at it, as it progressed entire cities were abandoned, people ran for the hills so to speak. They were terrified, hospitals were abandoned still filled with patients, highways simply stopped from the influx of travelers, and entire nursing homes were left with al the elderly still inside.

Finally after a year and a half of panic people started becoming organized, moving in large groups and researching ways to get rid of the barriers. The princesses noticed this and panicked, they sent out groups of ponies in hopes of speeding the process before the research even got off the ground. The ponies never stood a chance, groups of pegasi were shot down with anti-aircraft artillery, earth ponies suffered due to the thousands of traps left behind by former hunters and military men, and unicorns were the victims of snipers who took them out in droves without being spotted once. Eventually the princesses gave up on speeding the conversion and simply sat behind the barrier hoping their research turned up nothing, sadly their hopes were met, the research proved to bear no fruit and was more trouble than it was worth.

We decided to try a different path, we turned to the stars in hopes that we could leave before they reached us, we were met with massive success, with the combined might of thousands of determined scientists from all parts of the world we managed to use our remaining resources to build a single ship, the Houdini, in honor of our miraculous escape.

There was not nearly enough room on the ship for all the survivors but that was no problem, there was no panic for a spot as one might expect. The remnants of humanity were jaded and sad even with this achievement, our only hope, the one we all carried with us was for humanity's survival, if not with us than with the ones on that ship. The ones chosen for the trip were surprising if anything, there was a single crew to pilot the ship, all of the children (not much left), a small amount of scientists whose fields varied as much as they could, and finally as much of our culture as we could pack, there was everything from famous pieces of art to music, books, and movies. We wanted the next humanity to remember their history, their art, their music.

As the ship launched off everything was without a hitch, watching it disappear into the endless blue. Some were crying tears of relief and others were simply praying to their respective religions for safe travels.

Its been three months since the launch and this is the last stronghold, the last frontier, ironic that it would be Alaska that would be untouched by the barrier. I could see the barrier approaching from the window, a massive wall of pink. I was the last, the rest had chosen to commit suicide rather than to see what we had planned, humanity's last act. In front of me was a single bright red button, as unassuming as it might appear it was connected to thousands of nukes strategically placed around the world, inside and outside of the barrier, one actually directly underneath this base, with one push of a button they would all go off, utterly decimating the planet. When the barriers had launched this plan came into being, operation Parting Shot.

As the barrier reached just a foot from the door it stopped dead, they wanted to brag. Out of the barrier stepped the four princesses, devil incarnate for some, anti christ for others, my back was turned to them but I could hear them, and they couldn't see our little surprise. Before they could even start I cut them off without turning around.

"You know, humanity's an ancient thing, we've been around for thousands of years and our encestors even longer. We struggled, fought and killed for our right on this planet, we never stopped when we were knocked down a few times, that's part of learning. Eventually through trial and error we made Earth Humanity's first but not last home. We learned so much, we've done so much here, and we probably old have done more if it wasn't for you, you came into our home, our house that we made with our own sweet and blood, and you claim us unfit to live in what we created you claim that you who have done nothing to create this have more of a right to live here than us. That makes us angry, that makes all of us angry, we loved this planet, we were finally going on the path to save it, then you come in and muck it all up. You chased us out of our own home, we've accepted that through our anger and we left to find a new one, but the thing is, humanity, we have two things that are always going to be with us, we adapt, we know this isn't our home anymore, but that allows us to enact our second trait, humanity, were a vindictive lot."

I pushed the button, the world lit up.

Aboard the Houdini ___________________________________________________________________________________

"Get me a view of Earth, the plan should have been enacted by now"

As the captain stared at the screen he shed a single tear, on the screen was nothing but a ball of blazing orange.

Author's Note

Second story, was kinda bored with the first.