Misfits and Oddities in Canterlot

by Hyperion1

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life
Length: 1205

A magical researcher and Equestria's first electrical engineer operate a radio station, discuss the nature of their world and have various adventures in strangeness.

Emerald Shard is a unicorn researcher with an unhealthy obsession with Earth pony magic and conspiracy theories.

Ampere Booster is an earth pony with far too many connections and just as many secrets. Invented the field of electrical science in his spare time.

Together these two oddballs run Canterlot Central, Equestria's first magi-technological radio station, have odd adventures, and just generally poke holes in what it means to be a rainbow horse person.

Enjoy!

Note: Ampere's connections mean that this story may feature a great number of races and characters, each probably not for longer than a few chapters, so character tags will not be updated. There's just too many.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2017-01-22 23:52:04 UTC

Breaking News

The early morning sun struck the golden domes of Canterlot at a low angle, illuminating the street below in bizarre ripples as if the whole city had been submerged beneath waves of light.

It was a weekday and the streets were all but empty. A few cleaners and the odd businesspony went about their early duties in the subdued manner of the almost-awake. And through the silence a pastel-blue unicorn trotted cheerfully, saddlebags bouncing on her back, bouncing hoofsteps reverberating from the stone towers to create a complex drumbeat for her to dance to. It was a good morning.

Emerald Shard loved mornings, she always had, especially in Canterlot. She had woken up in some of the most breathtaking places in Equestria and to this day Canterlot mornings were without a doubt the second most impressive. Watching the sun rise through the light-distorting barrier of the Crystal Heart had spoiled her, it seemed. Still the golden spires of Canterlot held a special place in her heart, even while it's half asleep.

Her partner would be awake, of course. She was never sure when the earth pony actually slept, or even where he slept. It was probably at his desk. Yet somehow he still managed to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed every morning when she arrived.

For a moment she stood in the shadow of the tower that contained the pair's makeshift laboratory and office and looked up. Like every other building it was white marble from the quarries at the foot of the mountain, but this one was unique in that it lacked a turret, dome, minaret or spire of any kind. The building simply came to a flat roof at the top. The sunlight still glinted from something, though, and that something was the reason she was here.

She trotted the trot of the insufferable morning pony all the way to the office door, then froze. The sound of arcing electricity or distorted music utterly failed to float through the door. Her partner wasn't in the office. There was no smell of ozone and burning solder either so he wasn't in his workshop. The building clearly wasn't on fire either and there were no medical ponies swarming the scene so he hadn't tried to interfere with one of her crystals, something that always caused a scene. So where was he?

A lick of pink light and the door creaked. Emerald entered cautiously. "Amp?"

"In here, Em. You might want to see this." came the earth pony's voice, laced with something like...worry? That made no sense. Amp never worried. He got excited to the point of manic, sure,  but actual fear was entirely new.

She entered the small side room the two used as a conventional office. Shelves and filing cabinets covered the walls, none of which contained actual files. Lyric sheets, schematics, tomes of advanced unicorn magic and applied geology lined the outer edges of the room but the bulk was clearly occupied by one thing. Records. Every era, every genre, every nationality of music the pair had been able to collect crowded round the two.

The earth pony was facing the desk away from her as she walked in. He turned very slowly to face her, never taking his eyes from the thing he held in one hoof. The scroll was thick and slightly yellow but the sun stamp on the seal was unforgettable.

"Celestia," breathed Emerald. She met her partner's eye. "What does it say?" Wordlessly, he passed it to her. Taking it in her magic she began to scan the intricate calligraphy.

She mouthed the words, occasionally verbalizing some key phrases, her face falling with each word. "Future of Equestria...public announcement...significant development...Twilight Sparkle...NEW PRINCESS!" she shrieked. Her partner could only give her a slightly green look and point at the document.

"Keep reading." he wavered. Her eyes flicked back and forth across the remainder of the page, then all at once her magic flared and died leaving the pages to flutter to the floor. She met the stallion's eyes as he gave her a look that said "Yeah, I know."

After a few seconds of stunned absorption, she locked her features and gave one fateful word.

"Broadcast?"

"Broadcast."

****

The pair did what they did, running from room to room adjusting and checking sections of the incomprehensible jumble of metal wiring and crystalline arcana to ensure the entire dual-natured mechanism would for another day fail to tear itself apart.

When their frenzied preparation was complete the city was beginning to awaken in earnest. The usual city buzz was beginning to filter in through the closed window, still at a slightly subdued level, this was Canterlot after all.

Emerald sat at her workstation, a dizzying array of magical and mechanical controls arranged around her. Ampere Booster, the voice of the city, sat in the soundproof booth in front of his microphone. He was taking deep, controlled breaths to calm down, but his pale grey coat still seemed lighter than usual.

Emerald gave a silent nod through the glass. You ready?

A slightly shaky nod returned. I think so, yeah.

Alright then.

Emerald adjusted a few sliders then hit a big red button labelled "Transmit." Inside the booth a tiny crystal lit up red.

Canterlot's only radio presenter began to speak.

****

Emerald sat back on her stool, staring at her partner so intently that she almost missed his signal to kill the transmission. She spoke as soon as he opened the door.

"That was beautiful, Amp. Did you just ad-lib that?"

"It's a gift, I guess. It certainly got the point across," he said distractedly as he crossed to the window.

"How do we know it worked?"

"Simple," he responded, throwing open the window and sticking his head out. His ears flicked this way and that for a moment before he pulled it back in.

The city was silent. It should have been the height of morning activity, but all across the city you could have heard a raindrop fall. Emerald opened her mouth to ask something, anything to break the silence but Ampere held up a hoof. He heaved in a full lungful of air, stuck his head back out the window and bellowed.

"WOOOOHOOOOO!"

He brought his head back in to an extremely perplexed look from his partner. "Wait for it..."

From somewhere nearby came a blast of whooping and cheering and stamping of hooves. Then again, further away, sounds of jubilation like a spontaneous party suddenly erupting. Over and over, all across the city groups of ponies joined the party.

Equines by their very nature are herd creatures. When in a crowd they will prefer to follow the group rather than set out alone. Canterlot unicorns, especially, are aristocrats and the upper class. They would never succumb to such uncouth behavior as whooping and cheering like a maniac in the face of incredibly good news.

Not unless they heard somepony else do it first.

The news and the cheering spread like wildfire and before long the confetti was falling like rain. If there was one thing ponies did better than any other it was party, and now they really had something to celebrate.

Equestria had a new Princess.