It's Wherever I'm With You
"I feel awful."
As the words quietly slipped from Sunset Shimmer's mouth, she knew that it was the biggest understatement she'd ever heard. For the entire week since she and Celestia had had their chat, her stomach was constantly twisted in knots. She was kept up late by her thoughts of utter remorse and sadness.
"I know," said Twilight Sparkle, who sipped her coffee a few feet away from Sunset. She'd known the science teacher since the time they were both teenagers, still attending Canterlot High School. Things were different now. Twilight went to college, and Sunset began working. Now they had basically switched hairstyles (with Twilight's gorgeous purple hair no longer tied into her stiff bun, and Sunset's baconesque curls tied up, out of her face) and had much more...magic-free experiences for the past years. "You and Adagio have been trying for a child for months. Hearing of an experience like that that hits so close to home? It must be...traumatizing."
Sunset nodded, her left hand rubbing her temple. "Not only that. Twilight, I am the child that ran away."
"In a sense, yes, but-"
"Yeah, not exactly. Not for that Celestia. But I left my home when I was just a filly. My mother has been worried sick about me for the past thirty years!"
Twilight squeezed her friends other hand and shook her head. "That's not true. Ever since Princess Twilight came to this world and met you, Celestia has heard all about you. She knows that you are alive and well. She even heard about your wedding, and that you are going to have a kid!"
Sunset felt tears swelling. "But it was all from Twilight! I haven't even ever written to her!"
Twilight leaned across the booth, wrapping Sunset in a hug. "It's going to be alright. Maybe you could even go visit her."
Sunset opened her mouth to oppose, but then shut it. For years she'd thought of going, but she didn't want to leave Adagio here. Or Twilight. And she was far too busy. Right?
"I...I don't know."
"Why not? You're not going to feel better until you do."
"But...even though it's open, I don't know if I can pass through."
Twilight smiled sympathetically. "Sunset...you won't know until you try. I can understand why you're worried but..."
Sunset sat back up. "No, you're right. She is my mother. I have to see her again!"
Sunset doesn't remember it exactly. Her mind was clouded with fear. She does remember her heart pounding in her ears, her vision blurred, and Adagio holding her hand as they waited for the Twilight.
"Oh Adagio..." said Sunset, tears welling in her eyes. "I'm really going to see her again..."
"I know, I know..." Adagio cooed softly. "Everything is going to be alright..."
With a great flash of light from the portal, Princess Twilight emerged. "Sunset Shimmer! Adagio!"
Soon enough, the three had wrapped each other in a huge hug. "Twilight!" cried Sunset. "It's been too long!"
"I agree." Twilight let go, and smiled at her friend. "Are you ready?"
Sunset nodded, but then turned around. Adagio stood behind her. Sunset asked, "You're sure you don't want to come?"
Adagio shook her head, and then pushed her curls out of her face. "The ponies of Equestria only know my crimes." She took her wife's hands in her own. "Besides, this isn't about me. It's about you."
Sunset nodded, and then leaned up for a kiss. She finally let go after a long, blissful moment, and then took Twilight's hand. "I'm ready."
Celestia remembers her first day.
She was born in Celestia's chambers, with only one doctor and a few nurses at Celestia's aid. The birth of Celestia's first child would certainly not be kept quiet, but Celestia had always enjoyed her privacy. Plus, there was no need for anypony else to witness the birth.
When Celestia first laid her eyes on her, she was astounded. She had a gorgeous orange coat, and bright red and yellow fluff atop her head. She was small; at least, smaller than Celestia had expected. And best of all, she was her daughter. Her's alone.
Celestia pleaded to hold her. "Princess, please, wait one more moment..." said the nurses, but Celestia felt as if part of her had been torn away. Unfairly.
"You have to give her to me!" Celestia cried. "She is only crying because I'm not holding her!"
The nurses shared some looks. Before they could reply, the doctor came to the rescue. "Here, your Majesty! She's all yours."
Celestia began to sob. She kissed her forehead and spoke softly in her tiny ears. "It's me, your mother! I suppose you hardly know me...But I have always known you. I've always wanted you to be here with me. I cannot explain how happy I am that I chose to have you. I love you. I love you. I love you."
They rested. They both stopped sobbing. They were both together at last.
Celestia missed her daughter.
Celestia remembers her school days.
As a child of a Princess, Celestia couldn't say she expected anything less than perfection. She would never say it like that, of course. But there was pressure.
The ponies who knew her said there was no need. She excelled in every single assignment, project, exam...A natural, Celestia believed was the way they said it.
Celestia raised her from her birth to be a reader. She found comfort in books. All sorts, from the largest history tomes to the shortest poems. She even got her cutie mark in magic. Celestia moved her to her School for Gifted Unicorns as soon as she could (as to make it look like she was not playing favorites, while quite obviously, she was).
But Celestia knew every scholar was criticized. Most complaints were on the subject of favorites, but some said that her curiosity was her biggest weakness. Celestia scoffed at these remarks. "How is a foal to become smarter if her or she is not curious? Exploration is key, in my mind. Those mothers and fathers who leave their foals to one subject, one talent fill me with anger."
Celestia missed her daughter.
Celestia remembers the birth of her brother.
His name is Sunburst. Though she was assumed to be a sort of "end" for Celestia, she was the complete opposite. Celestia expected nothing less from her son.
Celestia held him. She felt such joy, as much as she did when she was born. "He is your brother," Celestia told her.
"My brother?" she asked.
"Yes. But you must promise me something."
"Yes, mommy."
Celestia smiled at her daughter. "You must always be his best friend. You must always love him and protect him, no matter what he does. And one day, I assure you, you will think, 'Why did I ever agree?' And you must tell yourself, 'Because he shall do the same for me.'"
"May I hold him?" she asked quietly.
"Of course, darling." Celestia handed her her brother. "Be gentle now."
"Oh, I will," she said. Celestia laughed.
Celestia missed her daughter.
Celestia missed the time they spent together.
They were study buddies. She taught Sunburst all of her tips and tricks (as well as practically everything she could remember about past exams), while Sunburst told her about the newest discoveries in the field of magic.
Though they both definitely enjoyed their inside time, there was no need for Celestia to convince her children to play outside. The Canterlot Gardens were practically waiting to be explored.
Their favorite time of year was the rainy season. They loved splashing through the puddles and drinking rain. Often enough, Celestia would give in and run through puddles with them.
Celestia honestly never thought about how short foalhood really is.
Celestia missed her daughter.
Celestia remembers the discovery of the mirror.
At first only she and Cadence knew about it. Cadence actually begged Celestia to let her keep it (after ponies had done the necessary about of research on it, of course), and Celestia could see why. It shimmered and sparkled like nothing Celestia had ever seen. They were all captivated by it, and Celestia laughed as she watched her, Cady, and Sunburst stare at it.
But as everypony in the family found out, it was expected that her curious nature would get her in some trouble.
Celestia missed her daughter.
Celestia thought of her everyday. When Luna returned, at least Celestia had someone to keep her company. But telling Luna the story of her disappearance was heart breaking.
Celestia disliked the word "disappearance." Celestia (and, she assumed, everyone who knew her) knew exactly where she went.
Celestia never expected her daughter to return.
"Are you ready, sister?"
Hearing Luna's voice calmed Celestia. "Oh, yes. I'm sorry. It's just..."
Luna nodded. "Come sister. There is nothing to be worried about."
The sisters entered the room slowly. Celestia took in a few deep breaths. Her son, Sunburst, sat waiting for them. "Aunt Luna? Mom?"
Celestia hugged her son. "Sunburst..." she whispered, to no one in particular.
"I'm here for you, Mom. We're actually going to see her again!"
Twilight emerged from the portal first. Celestia ran to her and wrapped her into a hug. "Twilight!"
The mare laughed. "Hello, Tia. It's only been a few minutes."
"Oh, I know! But I'm just so nervous-"
It was then that Sunset finally emerged. Her head came through first, giving Celestia a glance of her beautiful crimson and yellow mane. She smiled, and her blue eyes gleamed. Her orange coat sparkled in the light, and, finally, Celestia was able to see her cutie mark again.
"Mom!"
"Sunset!"
The mares began crying, hugging, and laughing. Soon enough, Sunburst, Twilight, and Luna had joined them. "You've finally returned!" Celestia cried. "My Sunset has come home!"
"Why couldn't you come home to me?"
Sunset sat, her eyes full of tears. "I couldn't."
Celestia's heart fell. "But why?"
"I'd disappointed you. You heard from Twilight all of the terrible things I'd done in the human world, and even at home I knew that I wasn't the daughter you wanted me to be. Your first child...ever! And I was a troublemaker, a rebellious child..."
"Sunset, stop! You were never a disappointment to us! You and Sunburst are the biggest lights in my life. You are intelligent, beautiful, graceful, kind, and loving. You were always the best at everything life threw at you! I couldn't have asked for a better daughter."
Sunset began to cry. "But I was cruel! And jealous! I thought that even if I changed, you could never forgive me."
Celestia bit her lip. "Sunset, I know you are going to be a mother. And because of that, you will soon learn something that right now you can't understand."
"What?"
"Mothers love their children no matter what! I did know of all the things you had done, but I knew you've changed! Everypony you know loves you!"
Sunset took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I should have come back years ago..."
Luna stood. "We think that perhaps we should all stop dwelling on what we should have done years ago. We all have done things we are ashamed of, but today we stand here, as a family. Our love stands eternal."
Everypony stood. "You're right, Luna," said Sunset. "Mom, I love you. From now on, I am going to visit you every week with my new family. I'll tell you all about my new life."
"That sounds wonderful."
"And Sunburst," said Sunset, turning to her little brother. "I'm sorry that I left you all alone. I want to know about you. Your wife, your family, your new adventures."
Sunburst gave but a small nod.
Sunset continued, "And before I leave again, I want to say thank you. Thank you for never giving up on me, and loving me forever. I don't deserve such a wonderful family."
