The Six-Way Farting Contest
Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie were having a picnic together. Spike was asleep after drinking the punch, but the rest of the ponies had cider, along with many cupcakes from Sugarcube Corner, which were absolutely delicious.
What Fluttershy, Applejack, Rarity, and Twilight didn't know was that Pinkie Pie had sprinkled a LOT of fart powder on the frosting of the cupcakes, and Rainbow Dash had sneakily poured just as much fart powder into all the cider. They had conspired to pull this prank together.
About ten minutes after the ponies had finished eating their cupcakes and drinking their cider, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie noticed looks of discomfort on the other ponies' faces, and snickered.
"What's so funny?" said Twilight, but at that moment, she accidentally farted loudly, and blushed. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie started laughing.
"What in tarnation is going on?" said Applejack, while farting loudly. She didn't feel any shame, but she didn't find it funny either.
"There must have been something in those cupcakes!" said Rainbow Dash, and she let out a loud fart, sighing of relief while Pinkie Pie laughed, letting three short, wet farts of her own.
"Really, you two are so..." Rarity began, but then, she accidentally let out a loud, wet fart, and blushed beet red.
Fluttershy farted silently, relieved that no one had heard it, but blushing lightly all the same.
"Rainbow Dash, did you..." Twilight paused as she farted again. "...put fart powder in these cupcakes?"
"No, I did!" said Pinkie Pie, letting out a high-pitched fart and giggling.
"I did the cider," said Rainbow Dash as she let out an airy fart and chuckled.
"Ah don't see why you think that's so funny," said Applejack, unabashedly farting loudly.
"Indeed," said Rarity. "It's so uncouth!" She farted again and blushed.
Fluttershy accidentally let out a loud fart, and blushed. "Um... excuse me," she said nervously.
"Don't worry about it sugarcube," said Applejack. "It ain't your fault. It's theirs." She pointed to Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie.
"We should totally have a farting contest!" said Rainbow Dash. "I know I'd win, of course!"
"Ooh! Farting contest sounds like fun!" said Pinkie Pie. She resisted the urge to fart again, saving it for the contest.
"What makes you think any of us would want to?" said Twilight.
"Applejack!" said Rainbow Dash. "Consider it another competition! We did the Iron Pony competition, and the Most Daring competition! Don't you want to see who's better at farting?"
Applejack was never one to run away from a competition with Rainbow Dash. "I accept your challenge!" she said.
"Well I don't," said Rarity. "It's so unladylike."
"You're gonna have to let it all out sooner or later!" said Rainbow Dash.
"I'd prefer to do that silently and away from anyone else," said Rarity. She accidentally farted loudly, and blushed again.
"If you enter the contest, I'll spend a whole day with you at the spa getting your usual treatment," said Rainbow Dash.
"And if you win, I'll have Mr. and Mrs. Cake make you a snack-sized MMMM!" said Pinkie Pie, remembering how Rarity had taken a bite out of her cake for the dessert competition. "Without mentioning the farting contest! Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!"
Rarity loved going to the spa, and wanted to treat Rainbow Dash to what she and Fluttershy usually did. And she remembered how delectable the cake was. "All right, I'll enter, but not a word to anyone else!"
"Fluttershy, what about you?" said Rainbow Dash.
Fluttershy shied away a little. "I don't think I want to." A high-pitched squeaky fart made its way out of her butt, and she blushed.
"You already farted twice in front of all of us!" said Pinkie Pie. "And we're all going to fart too, so you don't have to feel ashamed!"
"All right, I'll do it," said Fluttershy, still feeling nervous about it.
"Well, if Rarity and Fluttershy are competing, I might as well," said Twilight. It would be quite a thrill being able to fart in front of the other ponies without having to feel shame.
"So, let the contest begin!" said Rainbow Dash.
"Me first!" said Pinkie Pie. She closed her eyes tight and farted high-pitched for about five seconds.
PPPPPFFFFFFT!
"Applejack, you next," said Rainbow Dash.
Applejack farted loudly for about three seconds. "Dagnammit!" she said.
"I'll go next," said Twilight, thinking Rarity and Fluttershy would feel more comfortable if more ponies farted before them.
PPPPPPPFFFFFT!
"Pinkie Pie, it was my turn!" said Twilight while Pinkie fell on her back laughing.
"I'm sorry Twilight, I couldn't resist!" Pinkie said, still laughing.
Once Pinkie was quiet, Twilight let out a loud fart that lasted four seconds. She blushed and giggled nervously.
When Rainbow and Fluttershy didn't step up, Rarity said "I suppose it's my turn. She let out a silent fart that lasted five seconds, sighing of relief and blushing.
"Was that it?" said Pinkie Pie. "You're gonna have to fart louder than that if you wanna win that cake!"
"Well pardon me," said Rarity. "I am accustomed to farting in a silent, ladylike manner." To whatever extent farting could be ladylike, but it was unavoidable even for her, so she dealt with it as best she could.
"Fluttershy, you're up!" said Rainbow Dash.
Fluttershy looked around nervously, and let out an airy but audible fart that lasted five seconds, blushing lightly.
"All right, now let me show you how it's done!" said Rainbow Dash.
PPPPFFFFFRRRRRRT!
A loud fart made its way out of Rainbow Dash's butt, which lasted seven seconds. Rainbow looked very proud of herself. "Try to beat that!"
"My turn again!" said Pinkie, and she stuck her behind in the air.
PPPPPPFFFFFFFT!
Pinkie farted for six seconds. Her fart was high-pitched, as usual, and she giggled.
Next it was Applejack's turn.
BBBBBBRRRRRRRT!
This fart was deep-pitched and lasted eight seconds. "What do you know? I'm ahead of you, Rainbow!"
Next, Twilight farted loudly for six seconds.
FFFFFFFRRRRRRT!
Then Rarity raised her butt in the air.
PPPPPPBBBBRRRRT!
Rarity farted for seven seconds, and blushed at breaking wind so loudly.
"Your turn, Fluttershy!" said Rainbow Dash.
Fluttershy tried to remember she didn't have to feel ashamed for farting in this contest. She took a deep breath.
Fffffrrrrt.
A quiet fart made its way out of her butt. It was louder than her previous fart, and she stopped after four seconds, blushing a little.
Next it was Rainbow Dash's turn. She lifted her leg.
BBRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!
Rainbow Dash farted louder than before, for eleven seconds. Pinkie fell on her back laughing, accidentally farting a few times while Rainbow Dash patted her butt and said "Looks like I'm winning again!"
"My turn, my turn!" said Pinkie Pie.
PPPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFRRRRRRRRRT!
Pinkie Pie farted for ten seconds, looking very amused the entire time and giggling when it was over.
"Good one Pinkie Pie," said Rainbow Dash, and she fell on her back laughing, accidentally farting twice.
Next it was Applejack's turn.
PPPPPBBBBRRRRRRRRT!
Applejack farted as loud as Rainbow Dash for eight seconds.
"My turn!" said Twilight, who was now as enthusiastic as Pinkie Pie. She didn't know farting could be so fun.
PPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!
Twilight let out a loud wet fart for about as long as Applejack's last fart. She was actually a little disappointed that she was still losing to Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie, but it was still a fun game.
Rarity stepped forward, feeling a little more confident.
PPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTT!
A loud fart made its way out of Rarity's butt, which lasted nine seconds.
"You're getting there," said Rainbow Dash. "Now, Fluttershy!"
Fluttershy wasn't exactly trying her hardest, but seeing the other ponies fart made her more confident. She decided she would no longer feel any shame in this. So, she took a deep breath and closed her eyes.
BBBBBRRRRRRRAAAAAAPPPPPFFFFFFFFFRRRRRRRRT!
Fluttershy blushed as the loudest fart yet exploded out of her rear, which lasted 26 seconds. Rainbow Dash stared, her mouth open wide. Fluttershy sighed in relief, then she giggled nervously.
"Wow, I never knew you had it in you!" said Rainbow Dash once she had recovered. "But it's not over yet!" Rainbow Dash stuck her butt in the air and farted as loud and hard as possible.
PPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFRRRRRRRRRRRT!
Rainbow Dash farted for 18 seconds, only slightly quieter than Fluttershy. As soon as this fart was done, she tried to fart again, but she couldn't. None of them could - their gas was gone.
"Fluttershy wins!" said Pinkie Pie. Fluttershy blushed, but smiled.
"Um... congratulations, Fluttershy," said Rarity awkwardly, as she not only felt strange about congratulating someone for winning such an unladylike contest, but she also wouldn't get her cake.
"Well, I guess I have to go to the spa with you, Rarity," said Rainbow Dash.
"Let's go right now," said Rarity. "I feel so dirty for engaging in this contest." She did, however, secretly enjoy it, as did Fluttershy.
"That was so fun!" said Twilight enthusiastically. She then blushed, and said "I mean, it wasn't so bad."
"So, I may have lost, but I still beat you, Applejack!" said Rainbow Dash.
"I'm not too torn up about that," said Applejack. "Ah don't find it funny like you do."
"Fair enough," said Rainbow Dash, and she walked away with Rarity.
Spike woke up, having somehow slept through the entire farting contest. "Did I miss anything?"
