Traditions

by RoyalBardofCanterlot

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Scootaloo, Pinkie Pie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash
Length: 2461

"She stood there, a saucepan atop her head. 'Good Morning, Scoots!' Happy GuGuflimkir!'"

Dash introduces Scootaloo to the customs and traditions of the Pegasii Tribe. (Side story to "The Care and Raising of Pegassii")

Published 2017-01-27 18:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-01-27 18:00:01 UTC

Chapter 1

Scootaloo nuzzled into the cloudbed, happily sighing. She was completely wrapped up in her blue blankets, the soft clouds perfectly contorting to her young, fillyish form. Up until about an hour ago, her sister had kept her in her wing's embrace. They had had a long time training the night before. Scootaloo's body had been aching, especially her wings, until Dash had convinced her to take a cool bath. It had done wonders to soothe her throbbing muscles. She was just now learning to fly, truly fly. After the bath and a light supper she had drifted into slumber. Dash had carried her to her room, but Scootaloo had gotten up in the middle of the night to sneak into Dash's bed.

It was definitely not an every night thing, but sometimes the presence of the older Pegasus made her feel safe and secure. Scootaloo noted the loss of the older Pegasus' warmth, but didn't mind. She was too deep in the bliss of dream land to care about much of anything. She pulled the blanket up over her head to block the sun whose golden light was turning the clouds into an orange and light red sea.

It was a beautiful sight, but Scootaloo wanted to stay in dreamland for just a bit longer. No, a lot longer. It was a Saturday and that meant no school. No school meant sleeping till at least nine, but not past that since that would mean missing the eleven o'clock episode of Power Ponies. She yawned a bit as she heard an unusual clanking sound. Somepony was coming up the stairs. Sniffing, she smelled the inviting aroma of hay bacon which meant Dash's mom (or Nana as Scootaloo had taken to calling her) was cooking.

That meant it was around eight-thirtyish. Soon, the hay bacon and pancakes would be done. Her left hind leg twitched just a bit. Last night she had tried to stay awake. Now, she was trying to stay asleep as House Rainbow came alive. The laughter of Dash's dad (Papa as Scootaloo had taken to calling him) and low murmur of a television. The sizzling of the hay bacon. The distant clop of hooves treading on clouds which was louder than one would expect. One such clopping pair of hooves was moving steadily closer.

Scootaloo's ears twitched as the clip-clop of hooves reached her door. There was a strange, ululating sound that sounded like it was in Dash's voice. Scootaloo's eyes shot open as she heard the loud "ululululululululuululululu!" that rose in pitch and quickened in cadence like the rhythm of some sort of primitive tribal chant.

Scootaloo sat up on the bed and rubbed at her bleary eyes. She had no idea what that was, but it sounded very much like her adoptive big sister. But what on earth was she doing? Scootaloo had never heard anything quite like it.

Slowly, painfully slowly, the door was pulled open. Scootaloo blinked, then blinked again. She blinked one more time. Rainbow Dash, her big sister and mentor, Element of Loyalty, Hero of Equestria, and Wonderbolt cadet was standing in the doorway, wildly shouting. A saucepan was atop her head. "Happy GuGuflimkir, Squirt!"

Scootaloo stared at Rainbow Dash before turning over and laying her head back on the pillow. This was clearly a bizarre dream. Princess Luna was going to come by any minute and tell her she needed to overcome her bad habit of eating too much linguini or whatever and then she'd wake up and have another one for her school-appointed therapist.

She was roughly shaken awake by a hoof on her shoulder which felt very real and very much not a dream. Scootaloo opened her eyes again. Dash grinned down at her. "C'mon, Squirt! It's GuGuflimkir! We have no time for sleep! We have a lot to do today! Here put this saucepan on top of your head!"

Scootaloo considered her options, firmly decided that it had finally happened and her mentor had finally gone off the deep end and that she had nothing better to do. So she pushed the blankets off of herself and climbed out of bed. Dash put a saucepan on top of her head and then hopped on her forelegs. "On your forelegs, Soldier!"

Scootaloo obeyed, standing on her forelegs (which required using her tail for balance), the saucepan falling over her eyes. Dash lifted it up. "Jump Scootaloo! Jump like Hurricane when he fought the Giant Killer Avocados!"

Scootaloo knew very little of her tribal history having been mostly raised by Earth Ponies, but something about that didn't sound quite right. But, Dash had told her to jump so jump she did. She bounced up and down along with Dash. Her little wings flapped so that she had an easy landing coming back down. Dash simply kept her wings spread, gracefully landing each time.

Showoff. Scootaloo thought. They kept hopping up and down, the saucepan once more falling over her eyes and messy, purple mop of a mane. Suddenly Dash let out another wild shout. Scootaloo shrugged and decided to join in. Together, mentor and apprentice jumped up and down, shouting. Dash occasionally told her snatches of lore like when Private Pansy led a herd of bunnies into battle against the mushroom people wearing a saucepan as her only armor.

That's why they wore a saucepan on their heads on this day. Dash hopped on one foot, Scootaloo following her lead.

"Now put yo hands in the air like you just don't care!"

Scootaloo was pretty sure that was a dance move from Zebrican hiphop, but she went along with it. She lifted her forelegs, swaying her body, the saucepan shifting unsteadily atop her head.

"Dash, when do we stop!"

"When the sun goes into the House of Taurus! Ululululululuuluulululululu!"

Scootaloo continued jumping, swaying and hopping, all rather difficult with a saucepan on top of her head.

Scootaloo barely noticed when Dash's mom opened the door. "What in the world?" Firefly awkwardly stared, searching for words at the bizarre scene unfolding before her.

"Happy GuGuflimkir, Nana!"

Firefly wondered how Scootaloo had learned Ancient Pegasan. Then she looked to her daughter who had a sheepish grin on her face. Firefly shrugged. "Pranking Day already?"

Dash nodded her head. "Yep! Best day of the year!"

Scootaloo opened her mouth, then closed it. She cycled through this several more times before locking eyes on her mentor. Then she threw the saucepan on the bed and charged her. Dash was momentarily proud of her apprentice's leap before she ran to escape the hurtling orange bullet.

She dodged down the stairs, taking to the air and shooting down them. Scootaloo kept pace only a few feet behind her. Dash headed up towards the ceiling. "Scoots, it was just a prank!"

"You woke me up early on a Saturday! I'm gonna tickle the life out of you!"

Scootaloo tried to get as high as Dash, she really did, but her wings just weren't there yet. Dash blew a raspberry from the safety of the air. Scootaloo went back down to the floor, and then used the cloudy surface like a springboard. Dash just barely dodged Scootaloo. Scootaloo twisted in midair and landed on Dash's back. Dash squealed and bucked as Scootaloo ran her hooves over her sides.

"C'mon, Squirt! Mercy! Mercy!"

Scootaloo decided that Dash had had enough after about half a minute of tickling. She leaned into whisper into Dash's ear, "I'm totally going to prank you back for this."

Dash chuckled. "Heh. I know you will. Wouldn't expect anything less from my number one little sister."

...
Scootaloo wandered around the joke shop. Shelves filled with prank books, exploding peanut brittle, invisible ink and itching powder rose up all around her. She hesitantly reached out and picked up a red box containing a bandage with a nail going through it. It was designed to be put on the hoof, making it look like a real injury.

Scootaloo thought about it and then put it back. Dash had surprisingly strong maternal instincts. Scootaloo didn't want to activate them only for Dash to discover it'd been a trick. That would just be mean. Dash's prank hadn't been mean, it had only been annoying and funny in retrospect. She put the box back and picked up a jar of itching powder, frowning. That was sort of bland. Dash's prank had been original. Scootaloo had to find something that Dash would never expect so the itching powder went back on the shelf. The fake peanut butter brittle can was similarly rejected.

She groaned as she surveyed the shelves. It all seemed so bland and uninspiring. Things that had been done before. Whoopee cushion? Scootaloo had gotten bored with that in the first grade. How did one one-up the mistress of the prank? Sighing, she walked back to the door of the shop and trotted out, the bells on the door jingling as she left. She walked into a bright sunny day, puffy, white clouds dotting the sky. Several Ponies, both adults and foals, were trotting around and enjoying the warm, spring weather.

To her surprise, one of those Ponies was Applebloom. "'Bloom! Apple Bloom!" She bounced over to her friend, who was walking out of a hardware store.

"Scootaloo! Hi!"

Scootaloo stopped. "I thought you were stuck on the farm doing chores!"

"I was! Finished'em up early!" She playfully bucked her hind legs. "I was going to look for you and Sweetie Belle, but I couldn't find y'all so I decided to go look at nails."

"Why?"

"I like nails. What were you doing?"

The two friends began walking down the street side by side. "Dash made me wake up early this morning, put a saucepan on my head and jump up and down."

Apple Bloom snorted at the image. "Some kind of crazy Pegasus trainin'?"

"Prank."

"Good one. Guess that's what ya get with a prankster as a sister."

"Master prankster. She has a medal though I think she had it made to be honest. I have to think up a prank to beat her."

Apple Bloom stopped. There was a familiar gleam in her eye. "Think we could get a cutie mark in pranking?"

Scootaloo grinned. "I don't see why not."

"Let's go find Sweetie Belle!" Apple Bloom darted ahead.

Scootaloo bounced after her as they rushed towards the Carousel Boutique. Sweetie Belle was inside, standing on a platform, wearing a frilly pink dress. Rarity was looking at her, rubbing her chin. "Hmm, next one."

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo bounced past Rarity's legs. "Crusader business!" Scootaloo hastily explained. They ushered the all-too-willing Sweetie Belle off the platform.

"What are we doing?"

Apple Bloom went ahead, rushing out the door. "We're playin' a prank on Rainbow Dash!"

"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS PRANKSTERS!"

With those terrifying words, they started bouncing around. Then they stopped.

Scootaloo awkwardly pawed at the ground. "So, uh...anypony have any neat pranking ideas?"

Sweetie Belle rubbed at her chin. "Uh...oh I know! Invisible ink."

Scootaloo shook her head. "Dash doesn't write that much."

"Salt in her tea?" Apple Bloom suggested.

"Maybe..."

Suddenly, a pink blur zoomed by then and stopped, revealing itself to be none other than Pinkie Pie. The Crusaders were temporarily dizzy. Pinkie pranced. "I had an itchy tail and twitchy hooves! Is somepony planning a prank on Dashie?"

"I am!" Scootaloo hopped up and down. "You have any pranking ideas?"

Pinkie rolled her eyes. "Do I have any pranking ideas she asks. Who do you think was responsible for that cupcake storm last week? Anyway, let's head to Sugarcube Corner. I have the perfect plan..."

The Crusaders shrugged and followed her.

...
Scootaloo stood on a stool, stirring the white dough. The formerly pristine kitchen was a mess. Pots, pans and plates crowded the sink, soaking in brown water. Dough had splattered the walls, which Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle were scrubbing under Pinkie's watchful eye. Pinkie jumped back over to Scootaloo. Apple Bloom swatted Sweetie Belle with the dish rag when Pinkie wasn't looking and Sweetie swatted her back. They then started giggling and playfully swatting each other.

Pinkie smiled at them. "Finish in the next half-an-hour and you'll get cake!"

They stopped swatting each other and returned to scrubbing the walls. Apple Bloom's eye twitched as she spotted some tree sap. They should never have ticked off that forest gypsy.

Pinkie took Scootaloo's foreleg and guided it as she stirred the dough. "And...done! Now we just add the Marexican jumping beans."

...
Dash yawned and stretched as she walked into her cloud home, the cool softness of the clouds heavenly against her hooves. She spread her wings and flapped them twice before she stretched. What a day it had been. Cloudbusting over the Everfree was always hard.

"Now!"

Before Dash could react freezing water fell on her head, completely soaking her mane. "Hey!"

She looked up. Her protege floated back down to earth, the bucket still in her hooves. Her two friends, no doubt protected by the cloudwalking spell, giggled as they came out of their hiding places behind the couch.

"Happy Guguflimkir!"

Dash shook her head. "Eh. Kind of a lame prank to be honest."

Scootaloo looked down, her ears folding back and lips jutting out in a sulk. Dash tousled her mane. "Aw, don't pout. You'll do better next time."

She brightened up."Yeah. By the way, I got you something. Wait right here."

She scampered into the kitchen and returned with a plate atop her back. On the plate was a mouthwatering piece of apple fritter. Dash's mouth actually did water. "What's this for?"

Scootaloo smiled. "For being such an awesome big sister!"

And some say Dash's ego grew three sizes that day. She lifted her chin and puffed out her wings and chest. "Well, I am pretty awesome."

She reached out and picked up the fritter, lifting it to her lips. The second she bit into it, it exploded. Crust, filling and apple pieces splashed into her face.

Scootaloo's lips twitched and then all three Crusaders were rolling around on the ground laughing. Dash stared at them for a second. "You...used a decoy prank to...hide the real prank..." She wiped away a tear. "Scoots, I don't think I've ever been this proud of you. C'mere, kid!"

She opened her forelegs which Scootaloo gleefully ran to. The next thing she knew, Dash was running her hooves over her most ticklish spots, eliciting squeals of laughter. Scootaloo squirmed from her grip and Dash took off after her, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle. The Crusaders ran around the house, Dash in hot pursuit, everypony involved laughing till tears rolled down their cheeks.

It was the best Guguflimkir in years.