The Lego Batman Crossover

by MetalJrock

Rating: everyone
Tags: Crossover, Alternate Universe, Comedy, Random, Adventure
Length: 2962

The Equestrians find themselves in Lego Batman's world.

Lego Batman Movie Spoilers (I'll try to not reveal too much)

After a spell gone awry, Princess Twilight Sparkle and her friends wake up in a new world. With new plastic bodies. They find themselves in a blocky city called Gotham, which is the home of the egotistical vigilante: Batman. And now, they have to adjust here until they find a way home.

Batman has found friends and a Batfamily, but still acts like his old self. And the arrival of these otherworldy beings will make the Dark Knight's life crazier than ever before.

And Joker is aware of this, and seeks to use this knowledge to his advantage, perhaps repeating an earlier plan.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2017-02-13 06:09:30 UTC

Who's the (Bat)Man!

Lego Gotham...

A blocky explosion occurred at the Gotham Power Plant, creating a large hole in the wall. Security guards came running up, their weapons in hand. "Pew pew pew!" all of them shouted, yellow beams shooting out of the holsters, but unfortunately each shot conveniently missed the large group storming in, all of them exiting a number of helicopters and jets still in midair, circuling the known locale within Gotham City.

"Pew pew." said the blue man with armor and a gun that shot ice, freezing the unsuspecting guards.

The crocodile man charged ahead, knocking down the rest of the guards with ease. This allowed easy access for the group to walk in without a problem.

Joker laughed, turning around, his hands behind his back. "Ah, nothing like an old fashioned takeover..." he paused, "But it feels like I had just done this. Ah well." he shrugged, holding his plastic gun in his plastic hand.

"Joker!"

The Clown Prince of Crime turned around and saw a familiar person clad in black, with bat-shaped weapons in hand, "Ah, Batman! Come to stop your greatest enemy?" he asked his nemesis with a grin, spiked teeth exposed.

"Of course!" Batman growled, "What's your game this time? Take over Gotham and blow it up?"

"...Why yes, actually. I'm glad you figured it out. But first you'll have to get past some of your most diabolical foes from all around Gotham!" Joker shouted. After saying that, a bunch of Batman's old foes revealed themselves.

Joker gestured to each and every single villain standing behind him, "Batman, I do believe you remember, Bane, Killer Croc, Clayface, Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy, Mister Freeze, Penguin, Catwoman, Two-Face, Riddler, Scarecrow, Polka-Dot Man, Crazy Quilt, Tarantula, Eraser, Calculator, Gentleman Ghost, Calendar Man, Zebra Man, Music Meister, and the Condiment King!"

Batman scowled and crossed his arms clearly annoyed, "...I still can't believe half of you even exist. I think I may have fought some of you once and that was it."

"That may be true, but we still hate you!" Condiment King shouted.

Batman leaped forward, his foot colliding with Condiment King's face, "I get that a lot!" he quipped, facing the other enemies, uppercutting Music Meister and Zebra Man.

"Where is your family at, Batman?" Joker asked.

The Dark Knight flipped over Killer Croc before kicking, "Decided I didn't need them anymore. I knew I could take you all on again on my own. After all, I am that awesome."

"Your mistake, Bats!" Joker cackled, pointing his hand forward, commanding the villains to chase after him.

Batman smirked, "Hey, 'Puter. Time to overcompensate again." he said calmly while still, despite the large number of villains coming in his direction.

'Of course. Playing 'Let's Get Nuts Mix'.' the computer said, a hard rock song playing for Batman.

Joker groaned, "Stop him before he starts singing again!"

The song could be heard getting louder as the villains got closer. Then, the Batmobile crashed through the wall, running over most of his villains right there, except for Bane and Killer Croc, who were only pushed back by the vehicle. "Nice." Batman complimented himself, hopping into the air swiflty.

The Dark Knight's foot kicked Bane in the head. Time seemed to slow as the song truly started, Batman banging his head and opening his mouth in sync. The moment ended once the lyrics were heard and Batman landed, throwing a batarang at Catwoman, knocking her off her perched spot, and then threw another in the direction of Tarantula.

Batman uppercutted Two-Face, using his Batclaw to latch onto Eraser, stomping on him and then pushed down Calculator, surfing on his body, performing a backflip into the Batmobile, spinning donuts around the charging villains. "Heh heh." he chuckled, seeing his enemies get thrown around like toys. He sang with the song, having created it.

Then, Batman pressed a button, opening the wings, transforming the car into the Batwing, knocking down more villains like Polka-Dot Man and Crazy Quilt. The Batwing took to the skies, and Batman saw Mister Freeze shooting at him from a high spot in the plant. The jet dived lower and he set it to autopilot, opening the hatch and hopping out, using the Batclaw to disarm Freeze before kicking him into the ground.

Scarecrow tried to hit him with Fear Toxin, but Batman dodged, throwing a batarang at him, making him miss and hit Poison Ivy, who coughed loudly as a result. Batman punched Ivy, and the toxin made her plants wither. "That's one way to garden." he said to himself, going back to dealing with Scarecrow.

Said villain tried to use his fear toxin again, but Batman uppercutted him, performing a backflip so that he could land on Bane's shoulders, causing the large man to attempt to reach for him, but his jointed limbs could only reach so far, giving Batman the advantage. He flipped down, kicking Bane before spinning around and throwing a batarang at Clayface, which did nothing to hurt him, but he threw another next to the clay villain, activating the sprinklers.

"How is this happening?" Joker asked, Harley Quinn driving a small car as he sat in the back seat of it, watching the surprisingly cool spectacle.

"You know why." Batman quipped. He saw penguins strapped to balloons shooting at him. He rolled to the left, throwing more batarangs their way, popping their balloons, making them helpless. It was then Batman went to Penguin, punching and spinning around using his body as a surfboard to knock over Bane, Killer Croc and Catwoman before kicking him directly into Gentleman Ghost and Calendar Man, knocking them out. "Nice."

Deciding to get creative, Batman looked at his surroundings. He then hopped all over the place, grabbing various objects and connecting them, using his Master Builder abilities to his advantage. He managed to create a water turret and shot it at Clayface again and Penguin, knocking them down. He created a ladder and hopped back into the Batwing at the precise moment, landing directly in the pilot's seat as a result. "Perfect ten landing." he complimented himself.

He landed the jet, jumping out and throwing more batarangs at his enemies, hitting Scarecrow. Batman chuckled, "Some villain group. Every time." he spin-kicked Gentleman Ghost and Polka-Dot Man, who failed to attack him. He hopped over Polka-Dot Man, using his Master Builder abilities to create a cage around the detained villains. Seeing the small number that was left, he stood proudly, "Do you want to try me?" he boasted.

Riddler tried to whack Batman with his question-mark staff. But Batman grabbed it in his claw-like grip, threw Riddler over his head and held the staff, spinning it around to hit villains that were trying to hit him, knocking them back.

"How?!" Joker asked in disbelief, hopping out of the car as soon as Harley Quinn left.

"Because..." Batman said in a sing-song tone, he punched Penguin then Poison Ivy, throwing them into Mister Freeze, knocking down his armored legs, "I'm..." he continued, using his batclaw to slam the leaping Tarantula down directly into Killer Croc and Calculator, shoving them back. "Batman!" he sang, sliding on his unbendable knees, with a guitar in hand seeing the other villains running out of the building, scared for the lives. "I'm Batmaaaaan!"

"The bomb's about to blow, meow!" shouted Catwoman, being the last to run outside into the retreating jets.

This left Batman and Joker alone. The Clown Prince of Crime pressed a button, releasing some balloons with him strapped to them. "Well, Batman. It's just us. The greatest of enemies. Again." he felt Batman use his batclaw to hold him down as he ascended, keeping him in his spot. "I'm so glad we had that settled."

"I know that. This time there's no escape, Joker." Batman boasted.

Joker nodded, "But what about the bomb? It's either me or the plant goes kaboom!"

"It's already taken care of." Batman revealed, throwing Joker down.

"Wha huh?" Joker asked in an exaggerated gasp, wishing there was a camera to zoom in on his face as dramatic music played in the background.

"Dun dun dun!" Batman sang, "I know right! Totally cool of me to do. I am a great multi-tasker, after all. While I was fighting every single obscure villain, the team disarmed the bomb. It was easy as pie, and pie is real easy to eat."

Joker couldn't believe what he heard, "B-But, you said you were alone."

Batman scoffed, "Duh! I was lying! Why would I reveal my totally awesome plan to my enemy? It makes zero sense!"

"Hi, Batdad!" a young voice called out.

Using his batclaw, Joker was thrown onto the ground, with Batman creating a cage around him. He saw a kid with green goggles and a red suit with a yellow cape in the middle of the three. Standing next to him was a woman wearing a purple version of his costume while the older man wore face-paint with a batshape and an older costume. "We got rid of the bomb!" cheered Robin, happily jumping in place with his arms raised.

"I'll take it from here, Batman." said Batgirl, looking at the detained villains, "Did some of them get away? I swore there was when we found them."

"Uh... No." Batman lied, "They all spontaneously imploded when I captured them! That's it! None of them escaped my awesome fighting skills!"

Alfred sighed, "I find that hard to believe, sir."

Batgirl shook her head, "It's fine, Batman. We'll catch them later. We got most of then anyway."

"I would've gotten away with it too if it weren't for you meddling Batpeople!" Joker snarled.

Robin blinked, "That sounds familiar."

Batman nodded, "Yeah, but how about we go back? I'm kinda hungry."

"Yes! Ooh, can we play my song next time?" Robin wondered.

"Of course." Alfred replied with a smile, seeing the police park their cars and SWAT trucks and pull the cages into the trucks.

It was at that moment, where a bright light appeared. "Ah, my eyes!" Batman shouted, using his cape to cover himself. Eight strangers were found on the ground, surprising Batman, Alfred and Robin. There were seven women there, and a boy that looked to be Robin's age all unconscious. What interested Batman though was the fact they came out of nowhere. "...Did Scarecrow hit me with the toxin or am I just becoming dumber?"

"No, sir. I see it too. Perhaps we should take them somewhere safe?"

"I dunno..." Batman grumbled, "We don't know who they are. Or where they came from."

Batgirl turned her head, "I'll meet you back at the Batcave. If anything, we should be the ones to investigate this. Who knows if more lights and people like that are around."

"...Fine. 'Puter. Bring the Batwing down." Batman ordered. "It's about time I give this thing more seats." he looked around, searching for any potential parts.

"Yay! More company!" Robin said. "They look friendly."

"...You're too trusting, Robin." Batman sighed, putting a hand to his cowl. "One day, I'll teach you how to be an awesome hero like me. And that includes not trusting people who pop out of nowhere. It's in my novel."

Alfred corrected Bruce, "You don't have a novel, sir."

With a huff, Batman replied, "If I did, what I said would totally be in there."

Robin shrugged, "I believe it. So can we go now, Padre?"

"Yeah, sure." Batman sighed.

Unknown

The Batwing dropped down into the Batcave, and stepping out of it was the Batfamily. "Hey, 'Puter! We're home!" he shouted, Robin, Batgirl and Alfred shouting it at the same time, the three of them popping their heads over his shoulder. Their voice echoed through the dark cavern, heard for miles.

'Welcome home, Batfamily.'

Their jet had been built with the newcomers in mind, each of them placed in beds, which were dropped onto the conveyor belt of the cave to be moved gently. "Ugh. Now we gotta wait even longer to go upstairs." Batman groaned. "And that elevator is slow and small enough as it is."

"Well, we have to make sure that these people are alright." Batgirl reminded Batman.

Batman crossed his arms, "Seems rather convenient we're bringing them here. Sounds like these people are more important than any other person I've met who fell out of a portal." he quipped, looking over his bat-themed artiliery.

Alfred gave his surrogate son a deadpan look, "And who else have you met under those circumstances?"

Narrowing his eyes, Batman mumbled after a pause, "That's besides the point. I have for future reference met someone like that."

"Right." Batgirl muttered sarcastically, removing her cowl.

Robin pressed his hands together, seeing the unconscious figured being placed in a circle. "Do you think they're alright, Padre?" he asked, looking to Batman.

"Of course they are, kid. The awesome atmosphere of the Batcave should be healing them." Batman bragged.

"Urgh..."

Batman smiled, "See?"

"Wow!"

One of the strangers clenched their eyes further shut before slowly opening them, taken aback by Batman and Robin looking at her. She squeaked under her breath and twitched in surprise, making her almost fall off the bed. "What the..." she muttered, trying to get back feeling to her limbs.

"Easy, miss..." Alfred warned, gently placing a hand on the woman's shoulder.

"What's happening?" she muttered, looking at her arm, screaming as if she never saw it before.

Batman extended his hands, "Woah. I know we're the greatest superheroes ever, but could you keep it down? I wanted to get some shut-eye."

Panting, the woman looked at herself, as if her body had changed while she was asleep. She turned her head, noticing that the same had happened to her friends, surprising her more. Barbara looked at her, "She's obviously panicking Batman." she noted.

"Where are my hooves?" she asked. "Who are you?"

"...Okay. I know she's crazy." Batman muttered. "How does she not know who we are?"

Alfred gave her a concerned look, "Oh dear. Now, miss..."

Calming down, the woman whispered, "Twilight..."

"Huh? It's nighttime." Robin said.

"No... That's my name. Twilight Sparkle." Twilight introduced herself at last, calmed down.

Batman rolled his eyes, "What? Did a bunch of hippies name you?" that comment earned an elbow nudge from Barbara, a pop sound heard from that, "Ow! What was that for?" he asked, Barbara responded by pretending she didn't know what he was talking about.

Twilight looked at her body, feeling more like plastic and noticed her claw-like hand. "Where am I?"

"You're in Gotham City." Alfred revealed.

"In the greatest spot of all time, the Batcave. Be lucky I took pity on you and brought you here." Batman finished. "I am very nice like that." he assured.

"Well, thank you..." Twilight paused, unsure of the name of who she was talking to.

Raising a brow, Batman shook his head, "Uh... What? Y-You never heard of us? I kinda find that hard to believe. Everyone knows who the Batcrew is."

Robin nodded enthusiastically, "Yep! We're the greatest heroes in Gotham!"

"Well, sorry, but I've never heard of Gotham... Or look like something straight out of a toy." Twilight revealed, extending an arm seeing that she looked like a literal toy. "This is all new to me. I-I don't even understand how we all changed to these forms when we travelled through!"

"Pardon me, Miss Sparkle, but did you say change?" Alfred asked.

Twilight nodded, "Yes..."

"Alfred." the butler introduced,

Clearing her throat, Twilight continued, "Yes, Alfred. Back on our world we're ponies."

"...Excuse me, but did you say that?" Batman questioned as if he didn't believe her.

"I did. Back in my world, I was an alicorn." Twilight revealed, "We're all ponies, except for Spike, he's a dragon."

"I-I don't believe that... That sounds so weird. And this is coming from a guy who knows a talking kitten/unicorn fused creature. At least she didn't claim to be a bipedal Lego person." Batman scoffed. "As far as I'm aware anyway. That place was weird."

"But it's true!" Twilight shouted, her voice echoing across the cave. "You're dressed up like someone for Nightmare Night! So, why won't you believe I'm actually a pony?"

Pointing a batarang at Twilight, Batman replied, "First of all, it's called Halloween, not... whatever made-up name you just said. Second of all, I'm Batman, I get to do whatever I want. So long as Alfred permits it."

"But can we change it to Nightmare Night? It kinda sounds cool." Robin admitted.

"Maybe. But I came up with the name. But..." the Dark Knight held up an electronic counter, showing the number of good ideas. For Batman, it was over 56 million, and the second column, everyone else was at one. "I'll give you a point." he pressed it, the number changing one to two. "Now go on with your wacky theory."

"Yay!"

Barbara put back on her cowl, "It doesn't seem to be a theory, Bats. I say we should hear her out. See if what she says can be valid and save judgement for after."

"I agree with Batgirl, sir. I say we should give her time to explain herself. After all, it wouldn't be the most farfetch thing you've encountered." Alfred reminded Batman. The Dark Knight shuddered, remembering the fight against Lord Business.

"I want to hear this too! Flashback time!" Robin said. "What do you say, Padre?" he tugged Batman's cape lightly.

Groaning, Batman's head turned three-hundred sixty degrees thanks to his Lego joints, disgusting Twilight. "Fiiiiiiinnneeee!" his head faced forward again. "I'll get the microphone and notepad. Robin, you write the notes."

"Thank you." Twilight muttered.

Batman crossed his arms, sitting on the floor, "Let's get this over with."