The Extraterrestrial Equipment that Entered Equestria
Author's Note
So today is my birthday! I was actually born two days from Valentines Day. Can't tell you how old I am today, but I will always be young if that's what you need to know. Which coincides with my love for Kirby. Growing up, I didn't have much in the way of frivolous money. BUt I was given the game Kirby's Dreamland to have something other than Pokemon Blue to play. So needless to say, he became one of my imaginary idols growing up.
Fast forward years later and I find he is stronger than ever! Better abilities! Better adventure! And better games! Granted I have yet to play them all beyond the handheld ones for the most part, but this last one struck a cord with me. I loved it and yet after beating it I felt a little sad. Not in a bad way, as strange as it is to say it. Rather I felt sad thait introduced such an amazing game mechanic that probably won't show up in another game. At least things like the Amazing mirror's multiple kirby system got 'sort of' cone backs! The Robobot however may have been left with a tearful goodbye as it floated away into space.
So this story is my way of saying, "What if that wasn't the end of its heroes journey, but the start?"
Today is my Birthday, but consider this my gift I'd like to share with you if you'll have it. Please comment and note if you would like for it to continue so I will know the best way of keeping it going. Thank you!
-The Quidam-
The Extraterrestrial Equipment that Entered Equestria
It was over! [Star Dream] was finished! And with its destruction, came the end of Haltmann Works Company’s hold over the planet Popstar. Of course, there was a wider assortment of effects that were bound to ripple through the galaxy, but for one being that was enough.
He looked like a pick orb with limbs and a face. He could barely communicate beyond a few blubs of noise. Some might even consider him some form of infant, which wouldn’t be too incorrect to assume. Yet despite his adorable nature and appearance, this was a young Star Warrior who was responsible for Popstar being free once again. He was the Hero of Dreamland who had faced nightmarish forces many times before! His name was Kirby.
But despite this new victory to add to his repertoire, it might have been the end of his life at Dreamland. For after facing such challenges as a mechanically controlled version of his mentor/brother figure, a series of clones imitating his ‘arch frenemy’, and an assortment if technological nightmares including a certain wishing meteor’s robotic ripoff, Kirby barely had anything left in him to keep him going. He barely had enough to keep breathing, let alone return to his home planet! A truly horrific twist to his story were it not for the guiding hand of fate that came from his silent partner in this last adventure: [Unit Model# I-7090].
Kirby probably never knew that the armor he wielded to fight the Haltmann Invaders had a specified designation. In fact, it was doubtful Kirby understood a great deal of what was going on beyond ‘Metal guys trying to make my home clinky-clanky/must stop!’. He was as much innocent and childlike as he was heroic and courageous after all! Still, his actions throughout his battle to defeat the invaders struck at the core of this mechanism’s processors. Like the other armors built in Haltmann’s assembly lines, it was made to adapt itself to the environment, life forms, and technologies it encountered. In the time it was utilized by this young star warrior however, it developed something much more profound. What that was, not even it could say for it too found itself to distracted with more pressing concerns.The current one being the low health readings from its pilot.
:{Subject:[Pilot][Designation:Planet Popstar Inhabitant:Kirby]. Health Reading: Very low. Red Zone Noted. Consciousness hard to maintain. Sleep imminent. Note: While this life form possesses traits that permit survival in the vacuum of space, it is unlikely to maintain its biorhythms if knocked out. Conclusion: [Pilot] is in immense danger of termination!}:
These were the thoughts running in the programmed mind of [Unit Model# I-7090]. Yet what was more interesting was the things running through it without the expression of text. The things that went against the logic of a being crafted from metal and binary code. For it…felt things…when it shouldn’t have been able to. So in a manner that further spat in the face of its creators(as if it needed another one considering what it did to [Star Dream]!) [Unit Model# I-7090] came to a conclusion that went beyond the logical processes of its programs and asserted to the universe and itself:
:{[Pilot]…Correction! [Designation: Kirby] will live!}:
It then reached towards Kirby with a robotic mitt, and pulled him from the seat. It gently and determinedly tossed him towards Popstar. The motion of its throw was calculated enough to know that he would land safely on the surface thankfully due to his species’ resilience and the nature of the planet’s atmosphere. It also helped that it witnessed the ship piloted by [Mecha…Correction! [Meta Knight] on route to pick him up to further ensure his survival. All in all, [Unit Model# I-7090] had successfully made certain the survival of the pink Star Warrior!
So why was it experiencing a discharge of liquid from its optical sensors at the thought of how it was floating away from the planet’s direction? What was it about this moment that was eliciting such a response in its meticulously crafted structure? Was it a malfunction due to the lack of stimuli from its chosen pilot? It desired understanding, but the sensation made it hard to process anything else but what it tried so hard to focus on as it moved further and further away. The sight of what was occurring with Popstar now took precedence to its optics's recording capabilities. Of how it could no longer see the [Halberd], or the signs of mechanization on the planet. It witnessed the return of Popstar’s rings, finding their composite something further to record into its memory. Not just for the data profile, but because in unexplainable way to it, they seemed to correlate well with the compiled profile of Kirby in its databanks.
“:{…Goodbye…My…friend…}:” Its speakers uttered for some reason that eluded itself. It was illogical to do since it knew how sound worked in space, but it considered the possibility that somehow…perhaps that pink pilot that imparted so much to its recent development heard it and was responding somewhere with a familiar ‘Poyo!’.
¥[*.*]¥
And so, [Unit Model# I-7090] remained floating further and further into the starry vacuum. There was not much it could do without a pilot to guide its movements. It was not built to be fully autonomous, but a better piece of equipment for such things that were. Sure, it could observe and calculate to name a couple functions for such things were beneficial to its adaptability. However, the function of self preservation bid it to enter a low-powered state the equivalent of sleep. The minimal processing taking place in its core was perhaps its way of dreaming. Nothing could be said for certain.
It didn’t know how long it remained in space, for its internal clock was turned off as a part of its power saving mode. Ordinarily, that would be a minor correction to make as it updated its processes to the main Haltman Works Company systems. The problem with that beyond the unknown distance from said servers was their lack of existence due to their destruction by partly its own hand. Perhaps the armor unit would find humor in such irony in some form were it not for the reasoning as to why it was waking up.
By some miracle or perhaps even a whole slew if them, it had avoided being destroyed by any obstacle or obstruction space contained. That is except for the one it was about to face: the atmosphere of a planet! It was built to be able to function in space. It was certainly made to function on a planetary environment. The process of entering a planetary environment from space was a whole different story. Within the calculations, it compiled, and considering the factors involved it computed that the chances of landing upon the surface were 34.589% with minimal damage. That percentage however lowered significantly to 5.438% when it factored in the procedure of bypassing to atmospheric barrier and the consequent heat when doing so.
To put it simply, this was going to hurt! And despite not being made to feel pain in the conventional sense, [Unit Model# I-7090] concluded that this was going to hurt it a lot!
It was perhaps a gracious consequence that its speakers were shut down as a byproduct of the armor rerouting power to its defenses. Not for it of course! No, the former Haltmann associated device was in fact feeling the excruciating pain of being broiled in the atmosphere despite not having what we organics consider an orthodox nervous system. It only had no way of vocalizing it. Had it been able to do so, then the inhabitants on the surface below might have heard its vulgar cursing within a wide radius as it furiously descended. Instead, they slept peacefully, none of them the wiser as to how another shooting star in the night sky was landing much closer than they ever considered it could set down.
And this was really saying something when one considered that the rulers of the populous near the forest the object crashed into could move the sun and a moon on a whim! And that was just one of the many strange quirks about the planet that retained the land known as Equestria!
¥[*.*]¥
Equestria was known for many things. Its wondrous environments and phenomenal fauna to give some prime examples. What made it stand out a bit more was how it was the homeland to a particularly interesting species known as the Pony race. Other planets might have similar beings, but the ones in Equestria would always have their attributes stick out among the rest. Their species itself branched into three main varieties. There were the Earth ponies, who while grounded quadrupeds tended to be the strongest, sturdiest, and most in tune with the fauna and natural environment they inhabited. The Pegusi were not usually as strong bodied, but were swift, and capable of flight from a pair of wings on their backs as well as capable of influencing the weather conditions of the sky. Last, but certainly not the least (and to some, not the best as they’d like you to think!) were the Unicorns. They had the ability to cast what some would consider magic, and manipulate forces of man which opened to them a wide range of capabilities that ranged from levitation, transformation, and teleportation to name a few things. All three had their own histories that intertwined with one another. None of which seemed to concern a certain group who had left their schooling that day to pursue what they considered a better pursuit of their time.
It was a group of small quadrupeds. Each was a colorful little creature with bags set upon their packs that seemed like saddles; ‘saddlebags’ if you will! Currently they were ambling through a forest nearby their home for some reason known only to them.
“Remind me again why we’re out here?” Asked a young pegasus colt who possessed a bluish gray coat, a dual-tone dark gray mane and tail, and purple eyes. He was the last in line of other young ponies who were trotting through the nearby woods for some reason that seemed to escape him now.
“Cause we’re looking for a good place to have a clubhouse!” A surprisingly smaller colt said with a cockney accent. He had no pair of wings, and had a mostly white coat with brownish patches, designating him as a pinto colt. His mane was a dark brown and he went by Pip which to him was better than his full name of Pip Pinto Squeak. “Can’t start buildin’ somethin’ if you lack a place to put it in!”
Rumble snorted at his friend’s enthusiasm. Maybe it was the already long walk they had been doing, put the sound of possibly more work wasn’t sounding that appealing to him. “I know that, but why out here? We could have just as easily built it not that far from the school. It would certainly be less of a walk to get to.”
“What? You scared of being out here in the woods rumble?” An orange Pegasus filly teased as she looked back at the two other ponies.
“Me, no! I'm not scared! But I’m sure I’m not the only one not looking forward to having to get busy putting this thing together. Not all of us are crazy about doing hard work to get our cutie-marks like you guys.” Rumble grumbled as he felt annoyed at being called out like he was some scaredy-filly.
“I wouldn’t mind getting my mark out of it!” Said a rather skinny pegasus colt, named Featherweight. He had a cream-colored coat and a brownish mane. He also carried a camera around his neck “It could be nice to get it and have an interesting story to tell, you know?”
“That’s the spirit!” A yellowish filly with a red mane and big pink bow named Apple Bloom cheered as she looked back from her spot third from the front. “So how much further do ya think we have to go?”
The young white filly she asked broke out of her distracted trance. She had a mane of two kinds of purple and a horn on her head designating her to be a unicorn. As she looked at the others staring at her direction as second from the front, she could only utter a confused, “Huh? What do you mean?”
“Weren’t you paying attention, Sweetie Bell?” asked another young unicorn standing next to Pip. She had a purplish-grey coat and a brown mane as was closer to being his size, despite them all being close in age. Her most unusual feature was how her eyes seemed to crisscross occasionally. This was Dinky Hooves, a very smart young filly despite what rumors said about her and her family.
“Of course, I was!” The identified Sweetie Bell defended with shifty eyes. “Except I was mostly trotting towards whatever Button was heading since he’s in the front!”
They all looked towards the dark brown colt with an orange mane she pointed at. He wore a propeller beanie that had multiple colors. But most concerning was that his eyes were not on the path, but on the hoof-held video game he was enthralled by. Impressively, he could play it with one of his forehooves and have no problems trotting. Yet despite the impressiveness of such a feat, he was still Button Mash
“Just a few more doors and I’ll be at the save point. Then you’re mine, Rubicante!” he whispered to himself.
Unfortunately, this meant that none of the young fillies and colts had any idea where they were.
“Wait, we were fallowing you!” Apple Bloom narrowed her eyes at her friend and Cutie Mark Crusader.
Scootallo looked equally miffed, especially knowing that the young unicorn was probably too distracted by her…(blegh!) ...crush on the beanie wearing colt.
“Blimey, you mean we’ves been goin’ round in circles this whole time?” Pip asked the other colts while sharing a worried glance with Dinky.
“Nope.” Rumble grumbled. “But we were still following the lead of that swirly-head who can’t even keep his eyes of his stupid game-thingy!”
Evidently, Button Mash found the save room, because he stopped his playing and turned around to stare angrily at rumble. “What was that?”
Rumble got close enough to be eye-to-eye with the young earth colt. “I said we’re lost because we were all following a dummy who should have been paying attention to the fact he was leading the way!”
“At least I have a sense of direction, unlike you, who got lost on his way to Sugarcube Corner!” Button argued back, reminding the other of an embarrassing mishap on their part.
“Better than your sense of direction, swirly-head!”
“Bumble-Rumble!”
“Hey!” Pip parted the two from going any further in their argument. Despite being smaller, he was at least more collected than the upset members of his group. “We’re all lost, so we’ll all need each other to find our way back. No reason to git mad at each other! Besides, I thought we were tryin’ to make this club to avoid name-callin’ likes the ones Diamond and Silver spout at us!”
That took the wind out of everyone’s sails! No one wanted to treat each other like those two spoiled fillies.
“Truce?” Button held out a hoof and hoped Rumble would take it. “I’ll let you borrow two of my games.”
“Make it three!” Rumble gave a stern look as he haggled. “And I’ll call it even for calling me, ‘Bumble-Rumble’.”
Button sighed as he knew this was more of Rumble testing him and trying to keep his cool. Still, he was one of the few who understood the art the Joyboy presented. “Fine! But don’t overwrite my saves!”
Rumble shook the hoof as he calmed down a bit, still annoyed but not as much at their situation. “Deal!”
“So now we’re all friends again, hooray.” Scootaloo said with rolled eyes and layered sarcasm. “We’re still lost!”
“How about we head towards that?” Dinky suggested as she pointed towards some trees. Above them was a trail of smoke rising into the sky. “Smoke is a sign of fire, and out here it could possibly be other ponies or something that needs it, right? I say it at least need a look.”
“I don’t know, what if it’s a dragon or something?” Featherweight asked, holding his camera closer as if it would ward it off if it was there.
“I doubt a dragon would be out here! Or something messy. I mean, this ain’t the Everfree Forest…right?” Apple Bloom looked towards the others, who could only shrug. They entered the woods by the school grounds, so they were hopefully away from the forest in which everything was dangerous in some degree in it. At least per the older ponies, they knew anyway. “Besides, we got numbers on our side! It took six ponies to beat Nightmare Moon, and here there are…”
She quickly counted. “Seven! Therefore, it makes sense we can handle it if it gets messy. Plus, that just means we’ll get great Cutie Marks from it! So…!”
Sweetie Bell and Scootaloo stood by her and all three exclaimed, “CUTIE MARK CRUSADER RISK TRAILBLAZERS!!!”
With that impromptu proclamation, the three fillies charged towards the source of the smoke, ready for anything if it meant getting their ‘Cutie Marks’.
“Well, we’re in trouble.” Rumble groaned at seeing the girls in their ‘Crusader mode’. “And all this because you suggested bringing them into our fort making idea, Featherweight.”
“It’s not my fault they’re the best at making forts considering their ‘Headquarters’.” Featherweight defended as he knew his friends agreed wholeheartedly to accompanying those three fillies after he showed them the photos he took of their fort one day he was taking photos around Sweet Apple Acres. “We better go after them, considering Pip and Button are already halfway behind them, and you know Dinky’s not far behind her best friend.”
Too true, for the two young pegasi could already see the smallest members of their group already fading into the tree line, leaving them all alone…in these woods…were it was only the two of them to defend themselves. And was that howling they heard?
“Yeah! Let’s not be slowpokes!” the two nervously said in unison as they hurried out of there! Hopefully Apple Bloom was right in saying all together they were no doubt invincible to whatever challenges they faced.
¥[*.*]¥
[Unit Model# I-7090] was still smoking, but was still amazingly intact. Its entry was fortunately buffered by a mass of trees breaking its fall (sort of) and being partially buried in the trench it crafted. Its adaptability aptitude was outstanding in how it made it through the atmosphere and onto the planet’s surface without breaking apart and cooling off after over a dozen hours of being alone in the dirt like a hot coal in a gravel pit. As luck would further have it, the armor had been tossed into a clearing that allowed the sun to hit it just right. While solar energy wasn’t its main source of power, it certainly helped in giving it the necessary resources to keep its protocols going. However, that left one major problem. That was the fact it was a dependent device!
[Unit Model# I-7090] was armor. Sure, it had great processing capabilities and a method of interacting with its driver, but that was the necessity for it! It needed a pilot! Otherwise it was no more than an amplified action figure that was tossed aside! It couldn’t just lie here in waiting forever! Such a prospect was…for a lack of comparison to its logical understanding…terrifying! It was like making a sapient quadriplegic and leaving them to die. In fact, were it not for its self-preservation protocols it might even have considered shutting itself down for-
{“Poyo!” Kirby cried out as he saw the armor heavily damaged by mechanized enemies he knocked away. Seeing it in such a state made him frown, but then he perked up as he pulled out what looked like a bottle of cola in a star bubble. He handed it to the armor and with a glowing pop, it was absorbed and the wounds were no longer blemishing its surface. Seeing the device in a better state made the young hero happy…}
Happy…The memory from its databanks that popped up showed that Kirby cared for him enough to ensure that he was in a good state to function. Quickly going over other instances should that no matter how badly damaged he was previously, the pink life form always seemed to smile when he saw the Unit was still functioning alright.
:{Inquiry: If this [Unit] being in good health results in [Subject: Kirby] being HAPPY…would undergoing [OPERATION:SELF-TERMINATION] make it SAD?}:
Before it could contemplate this inquiry further, its audio sensors detected a voice shouting something towards it.
“###! ### ### #### ######!”
Its other sensors immediately directed themselves to study the new additions to the nearby surroundings. From the tree line came a group of small quadrupedal lifeforms that looked a bit smaller than even his old pilot from Popstar. And each of them seemed to have some look of wonder at the sight of its presence.
¥[*.*]¥
“Wow! Check out that statue!” Apple Bloom was amazed at seeing such an odd thing in the forest. The other young ponies shared her wonderment, albeit with different senses of curiosity.
It seemed to be made of metal based on the bolts and shine that came off it in the light. It was bigger than any adult pony they knew, even Big Mac and he was called that for a reason. It was mostly round with two long bulky arms with screwdriver-like spikes on top and kind of short legs. Its main body was also wear its face was with its big yellow eyes and possible mouth in the middle. It wasn't pony shaped, but gave the impression that it walked on two legs instead of four like those Minotaurs tended to do. What stook out the most of this odd statue was its color scheme. While the dirt blemished it a bit and made it dirty, it was clear to see that besides the pale yellow details and red feet, it was predominately pink!
“What is it?” Button asked as he trotted closer to it.
“Careful, Button! Don’t go near it!” Pip grabbed his friend, pulling him back despite their size difference. “It’s clearly not safe!”
Sweetie Bell tried to ease the smaller colt’s hesitation with a pointed hoof. “But it’s pink! There can’t be a thing that is scary that is pink, right? It’s like a rule!”
(Some distance away, a certain pink mare sudden had the urge to give a white unicorn a hug!
“I know that, but its smokin’ up like an oven after being used! It must be hot still!”
“What do you think its supposed to be?” Scootaloo asked. “Some sort of carnival statue or something?”
“Could be. I mean there is all this broken wood and stuff nearby. Maybe a Pegasus postmare dropped it?” Rumble noted as looked about, not noticing the stinkeye Dinky was giving him for guessing it until he faced her direction. “What? I didn’t say who could have done it!”
“But you were thinking it, weren’t you?” She huffed. “Just because she tends to be clumsy doesn’t mean she should be blamed for everything that drops from the sk-”
Scootaloo immediately voiced a question that pooped into her head, “Wait! Does this mean we got our Cutie Marks in being ‘Risk Trailblazers’ or ‘Statue Finding’?”
The young colts all took a peak at their hindquarters, diffusing any arguments that were in motion, only to all sigh as nothing appeared on their flanks.
“Oh well! Wouldn’t have thought that one would look cool anyway! Button mumbled as he tried to hide his disappointment. Still, he trotted around the statue to look at the opening on its ‘head’ and was amazed at what he saw! “Hey, that’s awesome!”
“What is?” Featherweight asked as he got done taking a couple of pictures of the thing’s front. Already he was excited at the prospect of developing them and adding to his collection. It was amazing how despite it being…well pink…it still seemed very cool and awesome already.
“This thing’s got like stuff that looks like it could connect to my JoyBoy!” Button cheered as he looked and saw that it was filled with what looked like screens, button, levers, and other such doodads. They all seemed to light up in a pattern that seemed to stop on one particular button. “Hey, it has a button that started lighting up a lot more than the others!”
“Button, wait!” Pip warned, but was too late. The young colt with the spinning beanie was just too amazed to NOT press the button! The moment he did, the eyes on the face of the so-called ‘statue’ lit up and emitted a bright illumination that seemed to solidify together.
“Oooo!!” The fillies awed in unison at the odd sight. Rumble gaped in amazement while Featherweight was in a similar stated of astonishment with his camera at the ready.
“COOOOOL!!” Button awed as he saw the light start to form into something that was even more amazing than the possible hookups to his Joyboys. What happened next was something that none of them expected to see that day, let alone in their whole lifetimes.
¥[*.*]¥
[Unit Model# I-7090] would be grateful for the beings that approached it that day. They seemed intelligent, so it stood to reason that once it was able to introduce itself, it would find a purpose again. At the very least it would have a method of fully utilizing its functions. Already one of them showed enough intelligence to follow the signals and push that button that activated its projectors. Just a quick introduction after picking up more of their local language and it would…Oh! Belay that!
It quickly went into its root archives and halted the commencing introduction. That one was recorded by [Designation: EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT: Susie]. It involved explaining to whoever found this armor that they had a few moments to vacate its presence, lest legal action would be undertaken to dissuade the audience from claiming it without purchase from Haltmann Works Company. That legal action being a [Gigavolt Unit] being sent to the location to ‘clear up the miscommunication’. While it doubted one would be sent due to the company’s current status, it would probably need a better representative to get its message across.
And who could be a better choice to represent his peaceful greeting to these indigenous life forms than the one who showed such a friendly disposition yet one filled with determination?
So a quick rewriting of code, and the projector instead went to show someone beside that robotic secretary to embody his salutation!
“:{Poyo!}:”The flickering ghost-thing that looked like a living puffball with arms and feet said before it cried out with an excited wave. “:{HIIIIII!!}:”
¥[*.*]¥
[TO BE CONTINUED…]
