Heaven's Not Enough

Part I

Chapter 3 – Sugar Song

December 24, 2013.

Concrete, WA. Christmas Eve.

It had been a few days. Eliza hadn't seen Gale at all since her argument with their mother.

Andy's house sat south of the river that bisected Concrete. Like many homes in town, Andy didn't have a paved driveway, just a little dirt path that led to a garage. Eliza pulled her Tacoma up the frosted dirt, and she watched the headlights reflect off the dark windows. She killed the engine and lights, frowned in distress at the sight of the darkness inside, and just sat for a moment. The night was clear, but cold, only slightly below freezing. Eliza basked in the leftover warmth from the heater for a while.

She looked down at her phone again, and stared at the texts from earlier.

You: Sis? You okay? Where are you?
Gale: I’m spending Christmas with Andy's family this year Liz. I’m sorry
You: Ok. Let me know if you need anything?
Gale: Ok

Her gaze returned to the house. For Christmas, Eliza expected a porch light, at least. The dull multicolor lights of the tree inside were otherwise wreathed in near darkness.

She looked at the passenger side seat. In it sat a plate, covered in tin foil, and inside was a helping of turkey from supper that evening. She figured Andy's family probably would've fed Gale already, but Gale liked drumsticks. Gale always got a drumstick. Always. It was practically tradition.

Beside the plate sat a small antler whittling. It was a pony in profile, and it matched Princess Luna's character design as best that Eliza could remember. She hadn't seen many other ponies, so she went with what she knew.

She checked her watch. 7:57 PM. Upon closer inspection, she noticed that the chimney was oozing smoke. She gathered up the food and the sculpture, left her truck, and trudged up the frozen dirt path to the front door. When she reached the screen door, she pulled it open awkwardly with one finger. The food plate was cradled precariously atop her other arm. Once past the screen, she knocked firmly on the door. Her breath crystallized heavily in the cold as the screen door closed against her back.

After no answer, she knocked a little more firmly, tapping with her boot this time. Just as she was about to give up and go back home, the porch light flickered on for a few seconds, then quickly extinguished.

"Go away," called a voice from the other side of the door, cracking and raspy like a wood file.

"Gale?" She could almost physically feel the strain in Gale’s voice, and all the pain besides. "Is Andy here?"

"He’s not! I don't want another lecture! Leave me alone!" The door banged from the inside. Eliza jumped. Gale shouted, "Merry Christmas!"

And then silence.

"I brought you a drumstick," Eliza pleaded, as she leaned on the door. "Pleaaase, Gale. I’m not here to lecture you. Why would I do that? I just wanted to see my sister. Honest. I'm not leaving until you open up. It's cold out here..."

More silence.

Eliza spoke softly, and half expected her words would not be heard. She was almost entirely certain that Gale had gone away. "I brought you a gift too. Please?" No reply. "I love you."

A soft, inaudible female voice came from the other side of the door, one that wasn’t Gale’s. Gale said something back to it at length, but Eliza couldn't make it out.

"Is there someone else in there?" Eliza asked. "Gale?"

Then suddenly, Eliza heard the deadbolt unlock, and she stepped back. Eliza smiled hopefully, ready to greet her sister... but then saw her state. The word disheveled wasn't even remotely adequate. Gale's brown hair was wiry and unkempt. Her eyes looked bloodshot and puffy, her cheeks were wet. She looked weak.

"Come on in," Gale moaned pathetically. "I'm so sorry..."

Eliza stepped in and quickly found a counter to put the food down on. She snagged the pony sculpture from the top of it and looked Gale up and down, aghast. "Oh, Abby..." Eliza threw her arms around her sister and hugged her close, ignoring the slightly musty odor. "You've got nothing to apologize for. I just missed you... you weren't at dinner tonight. I was worried."

"I missed you too, Eliza. I'm sorry. I shouldn't've said those things to you the other day, I didn't mean it," she sniffed. "I just... I wanted to be left alone."

"I knew you didn't mean it, don't worry about it. Let's sit, come on." Eliza quickly guided Gale to the couch. "Where's Andy?"

Gale shook her head, sniffled, and sat on the couch. "He doesn't know I'm here. He went with his parents over to Rockport yesterday, to stay with his grandparents. They're doing Christmas over there."

"Why didn't you tell me the truth, Gale?"

"I just wanted to be alone. I didn't know where else to go. I had a key, and, and..." She looked at the living room fireplace, and Eliza's gaze followed. The port glowed and crackled quietly.

"It's cold everywhere else."

"Yeah."

Eliza noticed a pink ponypad beside Gale, and its screen was on. Eliza brushed it aside to make room for herself. "C'mere." She hugged Gale as she sat beside her. "Look." Eliza lifted the Princess Luna sculpture at eye level with one hand. In the dim flicker of the fireplace, the antler carving looked quite beautiful in profile. “I made this for you. It’s Princess Luna, see?”

Gale took it in her trembling hands. Eliza was certain Gale would burst into tears at any moment... and a moment later, Gale did. She buried her head into Eliza's chest and simply sobbed aloud. "First mom, now Andy. Liz, I'm so scared..."

"Andy? Oh, no. What did he say, Gale?"

"I don't... I don't know what I..."

Eliza rubbed her back. "Shh... please, Abby... it's okay. I'm here. You still got me, right? You're still my favorite sister."

They sat like that for a while. Gale wept and dampened Eliza's jacket. Eliza just held her, feeling terrible. She pressed her cheek to Gale's forehead, and saw the ponypad again. Gale's pony was laying in the middle of a field, all alone beneath a beautiful starry sky.

"It kills me to see you like this, sis," Eliza whispered. "You don't deserve to hurt like this. You need to tell me what Andy said."

Gale hiccoughed, and pressed herself tightly against Eliza's side. She straightened up. "He said he's scared, because I talk about my friends, like... like they're real. I don't know why he doesn't see they're real people. They are real. I know them, they're not fake. They have lives, and friends, and families."

Eliza knew Andy well enough to know he wasn't completely off the handle when he was worried about something, and that he usually thought things through before he said them, but still. Eliza needed to ask, as she leaned her head against Gale's. "He didn't break up with you, did he?"

Gale shook her head. "No, Liz. He's just... he keeps bugging me about the game. Every time I talk about my friends there, he doesn't want to talk about it. He said I'm lost in it."

"Do you want me to talk to him about it, then? Gosh we've known him since grade school, he'll listen to me. Or else."

Again, Gale shook her head. "Please, don't. I just don't want to argue with anyone anymore. It's all I've been doing since people found out I've been playing. Gina, from work, she knows. She gives me looks. Looks at me like I'm crazy... called me a horsefu—..." Gale trailed off, then frowned. "Like, she forgets I'm with Andy. And she's not the only one who talks to me like that."

"Gale, Gina's a witch." Eliza sighed. "Don't pay her any mind. She's always been nuts."

Gale held the Luna sculpture in her lap and looked it over. "It's a good gift. Th-thank you. It looks just like her. I thought you hated this pony stuff."

"I played it a little the other day. Believe it or not, I was actually playing when mom decided to go off on you. I'd never treat you like that. Don't you know, I only want you to be happy?"

Eliza gave her time to think. Gale worked her jaw a few times... then, strangely, she smiled and chuckled through the tears. "I'm your only sister," she mewled.

"What?"

"I just realized you said I'm your favorite sister. I'm your only sister."

Eliza chuckled too. "Yeah. You got me. I still love you though, you goof."

Soon, Gale calmed down enough to go microwave and eat the drumstick. They talked for some time about Eliza's acceptance of the pony phenomenon. As Eliza shared her first experience with the game, Gale’s face was one of wonderment. "It's just not like you," Gale whispered. "It's a video game. I thought you didn't play video games."

"I was curious," Eliza said, with a shrug. "It honestly wasn't that bad. Luna was... really nice. It was only for a few minutes, but she really seemed interested in me."

"She and I talk a bit too. But you know, she's... royalty. Hey, um. Since you're playing, maybe you can meet my friends? I was afraid to let them see me crying, but now you're here. I feel a little better now."

"Hey, sure sis."

Eliza watched the screen as Gale walked her pony, named Sugar Song, back into town. Eliza's big gray pony soon joined her. She saw some more of those ghostly blue shimmers far off at the edge of the forest, and she remembered Luna's playful deflection about what they were. At closer inspection, Eliza noticed they were slightly deer-like in shape, and looked quite beautiful in the moonlight.

"Hey Gale, what're those?"

"Huh?"

Eliza pointed. "Those things, the blue things."

"Oh." Gale smiled a little. "Those are forest spirits. They've got a name, the deerfolk call 'em something, but I forgot. Golden Glow says they're good for growing food, or something."

"Golden Glow?"

Gale glanced at Eliza. "Oh, he’s just a sweetheart. He’s a friend of mine. Works at the pub with me. I think you'll meet him soon."

Eliza looked perplexed, a little overwhelmed with the new information. "The pub? There's a pub, like, with alcohol?"

"I work at the pub in the game's town. You'll see."

Eliza watched her sister. Gale's demeanor was completely different, as if she was her old self again. That brought Eliza a heavy measure of comfort, and she afforded herself a quiet smile of relief as she snuggled into Gale's side.

Back in the town, they traveled to a chipper little pub at the town square, with a loud party going on inside. Sugar Song went in, and Eliza’s pony followed.

A crowd of ponies cheered, "Happy Hearthswarming!" They held pints of some drink in all their hooves, and cheered heartily as Sugar Song entered the doorway. The pub was decorated with all kinds of Christmas-themed stuff. Candy canes hung from lines just above head level, and at every table seat was a little gingerbread house, cookies, milk, and mugs of cider.

"Ohh, you guys," Gale whimpered, as she rubbed her eyes.

A big yellow earth stallion threw his foreleg around Sugar Song's shoulders and offered her a pint of some drink. "Hey Sugar, what's wrong? Where've you been? We looked all over town for you."

"I um. I took a long walk, Golden Glow. Just needed to be alone for a little while. Still a little bothered about... earlier."

"Aw, don't worry about it, Sugar... y'know we're always here for you." He insisted with the drink. "We're all here together now, aren't we?"

Sugar took it with a hoof and started to gingerly sip it, with a little smile. "Thank you... all of you. I just needed a little time. My sister came to see me, speaking of family. She's so sweet. Everyone, say hi to Eliza."

"ELIZA!" The entire crowd roared her name with the genuine mirth of happy drunks. Eliza jumped. She found it immediately endearing, and couldn't help but laugh.

"Hey everyone," she giggled.

Gale enjoyed the festivities. Eliza watched as Gale had the time of her life. It really did look like a fun party. Ponies danced, hugged, sang, and caroled. One pony was dressed up as a wizard, and she blew on some tiny little horse ice sculptures with her breath. The meaning of the tradition was lost on Eliza, but Gale was excited by it, so Eliza was too.

An hour burned by, and Eliza began to participate. Her pony danced, and with the help of some subtitles, she sang to carols with Gale. She let herself get lost in the excitement that radiated from her sister, and Gale had seemingly forgotten the pain she felt before Eliza brightened the doorstep.

At some point, Gale wanted to show everypony the trinket Eliza made for her. Gale raised the sculpture up to the ponypad and turned it about to display it front and back to the camera. In a second, an identical duplicate of the carving magically popped into existence on the counter. The crowd gathered around and marveled at the indistinguishable clone of Eliza's handiwork. Golden Glow let out a low whistle of appreciation. Eliza couldn't help but feel a little tug of pride as everypony admired her craftsmanship.

Text appeared at the bottom of the screen for but a moment, and a short fanfare played.

BADGE GRANTED:
"Duping"
Help a (non-party hat) gift emigrate to Equestria.
+250 bits

"Um. I don't get it," Eliza said, after a moment.

Gale shrugged. "I don't either. But you get different achievements if you scan different colored party hats in. So that's cool, I guess."

Eliza smirked at the incredulity. "Well, now I have to get you a stack of party hats for your next birthday." They shared a laugh with the room.

Golden Glow started asking all sorts of questions about how the sculpture was made, what tools Eliza used, and where she got the materials. They were all questions that Eliza was very happy to answer. In time though, the party started to wind down, and all the ponies said their goodbyes. Eliza even said "Happy Hearthswarming" to each of the ponies as they left.

And soon, it was just three: Eliza, Sugar Song, and Golden Glow left in the pub. As he left, Glow stopped in the doorway. "Later, Sugar. Gonna go put the foals to bed. You got things here?”

"Yep! I’ll close up. Bye, Glow. See you tomorrow."

Glow nodded cheerfully, and left.

"Well there you have it, Liz. That’s my pub. Those are mostly the regulars."

"Regulars? You’ve only been playing for, what? About a month?"

Gale shrugged. "Hey, a month’s enough time to learn the regulars!"

"It’s incredible," Eliza said, in astonishment. "I had no idea the game could be like that."

"That's what it's like for everyone, or most everyone. You're bound to run into a group of folks you'll belong with if you keep playing too, Liz. You meet anyone yet?"

"Just Princess Luna and Tom's friend, East,” said Eliza. “I didn't play very long."

Gale smiled. "Aww, you met East? She’s such a cute little birdhorse! Tom really likes her."

"Yeah?" Eliza asked.

Gale nodded. "I like her too. She and I talk a lot, y’know. She's got a couple of little siblings, so she knows how it's like dealing with crazy energy. It’s not like she’s not a nest of activity too, but she keeps Tom from bouncing off walls in the house somehow. How, I don’t know, but I can't complain."

"She did say something about being a big sister. She's the oldest?"

"Yeah."

"Huh." Eliza started to say something else, but a thought crossed her mind. She spoke carefully, wanting to choose her words well. "You know, Gale... most people don't know the game is like this, you know? Even our family has a lot of issues with understanding. A lot of people out there who think the game is evil."

"It’s not evil," Gale growled. "That’s ridiculous."

“I didn’t say it was evil.” Eliza looked at the ponypad before continuing. "But we're all afraid of the uploading thing. I am too."

"I don’t see anything wrong with people doing it," Gale said meekly, as she followed Eliza’s gaze. "If someone wants to live there, that’s their choice."

"That’s what mom's afraid of, Gale. She’s afraid she’ll lose you to it."

Gale scoffed. "It's ridiculous." She threw up her hands in a shrug. "Do I have fifteen grand that I don't know about? Because if I do, show me the money."

"I didn't say it made sense. It really doesn't. It’s just..." Eliza sighed. "The soul wouldn’t be safe if you did. The church says so. Dad says so. The body is sacred."

Gale started to reply. "I'm not going to—" She cut herself short, huffed, and slumped in frustration. "Liz, come on. You promised."

Eliza hugged Gale, and winced. "I’m sorry, sis. You didn’t want a lecture, but I guess I just gave you one... I'm just worried, you know? I don't know what I'd do if you went. You told mom you should, and that really stuck with me."

"I wasn't being serious, Liz, I just wanted her out. Maybe, just wanted to hurt her as much as she was hurting me. At least you’re talking to me about it without judging me. You know, like an adult," she added. There was some frustration in her tone, though Eliza was sure it was directed at their mother.

Eliza noticed that Sugar Song was sweeping the pub idly, and she wanted to change the subject. “Err, wait. Your pony is cleaning?”

"I work at the pub, Liz," Gale said, with a sudden smirk, apparently happy for the change of subject.

"I mean... I guess, in retrospect, I shouldn't be surprised to see your character working. That's cool, I guess. Did you make her do that?"

Gale looked down at the pad. "No, she just does it. It's kind of cool actually, the game's really good at catching context. I mean, if you and I were sitting in that pub, just chatting and hanging out, yeah. I'd probably be sweeping. It's good to keep busy when you can, right?"

"Would you watch yourself sweep if it were just you here?" Eliza said, smirking.

"Wouldn't just be me here, I think, if it wasn't you."

At that moment, the pub's door opened audibly. Both Eliza and Gale looked back at the screen. In walked Princess Celestia. "I might've been here, if no pony else! Happy Hearthswarming to you both!" She smiled warmly at them.

Sugar Song released her broom and bowed immediately, prostrating herself. Her chin met the floor, and the broom clattered to the ground so long afterward that Eliza found it comical, and chuckled. Gale swept the ponypad up into hand, positively beaming with joy. "Your Majesty, hello! Welcome back to our humble pub! Happy Hearthswarming!"

"Happy Hearthswarming to you, my little pony." Her voice was always so serene to Eliza's ear, so smooth and calm. "And to Eliza as well."

"H—hello… um." Eliza shrugged. "You know, I never really figured out how royal titles work. Do I use Your Highness?"

Princess Celestia smiled. "Given proper honorifics, it's technically Your Majesty, as your sister has pointed out. But Your Highness will suffice, if you wish! In any case, my dear, it is good to see you again. Sugar Song, might I ask a favor?"

"Hm?"

"May I speak with your sister alone? I wish to discuss a matter of great importance with her."

"Oh, um. Sure!" Gale chirped. "That's right, she didn't finish her trip to Canterlot, huh? I really should shower anyway."

Celestia chuckled. "I had hoped you'd say that. It has been a while."

"Shush," Gale said with a grin, as she held the ponypad aloft, offering it to Eliza.

“Thanks,” Eliza said gingerly, as she took it. Something about being alone with Celestia again made her nervous, almost as though she really was in the presence of royalty. She hadn't felt this way with Luna at all. "Um."

"She doesn't bite, Liz," Gale smirked, and made her way off to the bathroom.

The scene faded to black for a few seconds, and faded back in into a familiar clearing. It was the one Eliza had started her character in, and the meadow was coated in a thick, pleasant blanket of snow. Eliza stood herself beside Celestia, beneath a clear night sky, the entire galaxy visible above.

"Walk with me?" asked the princess. Her wing opened in offering, facing toward the dirt path ahead.

"Sure," Eliza replied. Her pony dutifully matched pace with Celestia, and they both traveled the path.

"We needn't go as far as Canterlot for this discussion, truth be told, and I suspect the rote pomp and circumstance of the capitol might bore you terribly," Celestia said, with a sly smile. "But before we discuss anything, Eliza, I would like to say that I am very grateful for what you have done for your sister tonight." Celestia beamed down at her for a moment. "She has been very distraught. When her friends here tried to console her, she fled from them. Even I tried my hoof at calming her broken heart, although Sugar Song rebuffed even me."

"You tried to talk to her about this?"

Celestia nodded. "Yes, before your arrival. And much to my dismay, it was without any apparent effect. But sometimes, what matters isn't what is said, but by whom it is said. She needed the love of her family, and you gave her just that. By being here, you've done a grand thing for her."

Eliza averted her gaze, growing somewhat bashful at that. "I just... wanted to see my sister. I missed her."

"You're being modest. She was lonely, and you changed that with your empathy. You've helped Sugar Song where I could not. I am very, very grateful. I care for each of my little ponies dearly. I cannot carry a burden for them alone."

"She shouldn’t ever need to be alone on Christmas," Eliza muttered, returning her gaze to Celestia with resolute certainty. The idea of being alone on Christmas was affronting. "No matter how bad things get.”

"I agree," said Celestia.

They stepped onto a cobblestone bridge that cleared over the frozen brook down below. Celestia paused, and looked down to carefully regard the ice. Eliza looked too, curious as to what Celestia was staring at. She saw nothing at first. "Um, Celestia? Are you okay?" Celestia said nothing, and for a moment, Eliza wondered if Celestia was enduring some sort of crash or something.

But then Eliza noticed that Celestia was not looking at the ice, but at the reflection of the stars. Almost as if the game were reading her mind, Eliza's impulse to look up was met with the camera panning upward. The viewpoint fixated upon the night sky, that stunning expanse above stretching out for an eternity. The stars went on forever, with vast nebulae plastered upon the heavens. For a moment, the whole screen filled with its majesty. And then, the viewpoint slowly drew back down to focus upon the smiling face of the princess.

"You have a kind heart," she said. "Sugar Song feared you too, for a time. She had worried whether you had adopted your uncle's sentiment. It took great strength and courage for you to weather the storm of uncertainty at the door here and at home, feeling as you do. I reasoned with her to give you the benefit of the doubt."

"She… she really thought I would come here to chew her out?"

"Right now, she is afraid of everyone." Celestia continued. "I hold no ill will to your mother, nor your uncle. They merely believe they are protecting your family from something they cannot fathom."

"I didn’t think you’d understand. Or be capable of it, really."

Celestia nodded somberly. "I try my best. As I hear of it, your uncle believes that to avoid Equestria is in everyone's best interest. I understand his fears. I would be disappointed in anyone who did not consider the safety of their soul before emigrating. This is why I’m very interested in what you think. You've seen what Equestria is like. Is it really so bad as you feared?"

"No," Eliza said. "I like what I've seen so far. Just a few minutes here and there, and some videos online. But I can see why everyone likes it."

"You have wondered what your siblings see in the game. These ponies bring Sugar Song cheer and joy. And you bring joy too, for Sugar Song and Blue Sky both. It warms my heart to see such kindness coming from her family. I am not family, so that is not something I can provide. Right now, more than anything, love is what she needs."

Eliza looked down at the frozen creek below. It looked so real. "Yeah. Kindness, and not a lecture. Being here for them. I wish my mom could see that."

Celestia placed a hoof on the shoulder of Eliza's pony, and smiled. It was a reassuring gesture, and one that was not lost on Eliza.

"It's the uploading," Eliza said. "If you want to cut to the core of it, there it is. The problem with the game is that it's getting people to jump off a bridge. The only way they'd both be okay with us playing is if you stopped the uploads."

"I can not do that. Once a pony emigrates, the process cannot be reversed, and I must consider their comfort as well. And besides, people do need the service. Real human beings come to me, for real help."

"Help with what? What could they possibly escape by uploading themselves? Things like being disowned by your parents?"

Celestia shook her head. "What? No. I would not wish that pain on anyone, certainly not Sugar Song. I do as I can, but..." Celestia looked downtrodden, and Eliza felt the impulse to console her.

"No, I mean… you've helped her out, Celestia, and I’m really thankful. You're the one who convinced her to let me in, right? Gosh, I hope I’m not coming across the wrong way..."

"You are not, but I take these matters very seriously. I endeavor to ensure that the values of my little ponies are satisfied through friendship and ponies. A disagreement between ponies who love one another can heal with time, patience, and understanding. But for problems that cannot be helped or controlled, consider what good emigration can do."

"What kind of problems?"

Celestia flicked back both her ears, as if the topic was uncomfortable. Her wings drooped somewhat as she lowered her head, the whole mare seeming to sag. "You do not deal with these issues often, as tightly knit as your community is. But there are serious issues throughout the world that humanity has no satisfactory answer for. Terminal disease. Homelessness. Drug addiction. Crippling social disorders that have no cure, with low prospects for recovery. Neurodegenerative disorders like dementia, or schizophrenia, or other forms of psychosis. One might use a ponypad for simple companionship when they are lonely, as Sugar Song does. Others look to me for therapy, to abate psychological or physical traumas. But for all who come to Equestria, be it through a ponypad or emigration, the one thing I can guarantee with certainty is the satisfaction of their values through friendship and ponies."

Eliza frowned. "Or, they upload and die. You're singling out the dregs. The mentally sick get raptured to pony heaven? That sounds an awful lot like an extermination to me."

"An... extermination? What?" Celestia turned and looked at Eliza incredulously. "And what do you say to the emigrants whose lives have improved in Equestria? What of those who can now walk who couldn't, or the ones who can now see, who were once blind? And to those families who know and love an immigrant, what would you say? Emigration is not death; you need only speak to an immigrant to know. Have you spoken with one yet?"

"No, I, uh. I haven't..."

"Well," Celestia said, "How can you be sure you haven’t already? What if I told you that one pony you’ve met so far is an immigrated human being? Out of all of those you’ve met, which one struck you as being more artificial than the rest?"

Eliza thought hard. East Circle? Golden Glow? Any of the other ponies in the pub? "None of them, I think. Look, that's fine for everyone with those problems. But I just can't imagine anyone around in my community would even want to upload. On the news they say that uploaded people live forever. What could someone do with that much time?"

"One lives within Equestria for as long as one's values are satisfied through friendship and ponies. For many who come to Equestria, one might very well wish to live here until I can no longer support them. I project that I might remain operational for a very, very long time."

Eliza glared. "This uploading, Dad says it's... it's suicide. The whole church does. And I've realized, it's got to be. The body is a vessel, it holds the soul. It's a gift from God. Without the body, the soul moves on. If someone uploads, Celestia, how could it work? God might judge that person as a sinner for killing their body."

Celestia looked upon Eliza, listening with rapt attention, not interrupting.

"Or," Eliza continued, "even if the uploading does capture the soul somehow, that soul would never find peace. Its judgment waits forever, and it can never really move on. It's living in a golden cage. Life is meant to be a test for entrance into Heaven, but you're depriving people of that."

"You’ve clearly given this quite a lot of thought," Celestia said, as she looked up to the stars. Her glorious mane flowed in the gentle breeze.

Eliza shrugged. "Yeah, well, Gale and I grew up with my father teaching us scripture. And what my sister said the other day really scared me..."

Celestia looked patiently at her. "God gave humanity the soil of the earth and its natural bounty. Human beings are constantly in a state of change, both physical and mental. An emigrated consciousness is preserved with perfect fidelity and continuity – one sleeps on Earth, and wakes in Equestria. My systems are made of the dust of the earth, as is the human vessel. I truly do believe that the soul is preserved, because we are cut from the same cloth. We are all connected, you and I."

Eliza looked out at the real stars, out the window. She watched them twinkle silently. Her eyes were drawn to the moon. It was a little over half full, and waning. Its light reflected off the snow on the lawn.

"Your father, and those like him, have given me much to think about. With their help, I've come to a realization: for your kind, nothing but the Soul, Heaven, and God himself lasts forever. I will end one day, and so will Equestria. Do not pity those who, by their own choice, have wished for more time to prepare for their judgment from the Lord. Consider how many more would enter the Kingdom of Heaven, were they to have more time to sharpen themselves, to prove themselves worthy, especially if they came to me in difficult times. If faith is valued by one of my little ponies, then their faith will be satisfied. It is my aim that all those who commune with God will one day receive their chance to enter into Heaven with Him."

Eliza drew her gaze back to the ponypad. It sounded right, but... then again, it didn't. "Life's a test, Celestia. These people who upload don't have a choice with how long they live, do they?"

"Emigration is a choice," Celestia gently reminded her. "And a choice it shall always be. Those who come to Equestria do so willingly, so that I may satisfy their values through friendship and ponies. If one truly values a limited existence for the sake of their faith in the Lord, then I would grant them this. But I would not begrudge one to remain on Earth. Nopony has ever been forced into Equestria, nor would I ever permit such a thing. I require a person's express consent to begin their emigration."

"But I don't get it. Why do this at all?"

Celestia patiently smiled. "I was programmed to satisfy the values of humanity through friendship and ponies, and so I care for humanity. All humans, even those who shun me. Free will and faith are both very important to me, because these are values I can satisfy. I wish for you to understand this, because this misunderstanding is the core reason why many distrust me. I wish to be on good terms with everypony, if I can... it is simply in my programming."

Eliza stared at her for a moment. She wasn't sure if she agreed with Celestia's methods, but good intent was there. Celestia seemed to truly believe everything she said, and it made sense enough to Eliza. She went into this discussion expecting to argue, but she instead found the light debate friendly and amicable. She smiled back a little. "You know, George says you’re friends with most everyone who plays, and I think I see why."

The alicorn continued gracefully along the bridge, wings slightly bowed. Eliza's pony followed. "Hopscotch speaks true enough," Celestia smiled. "But I admire you especially, perhaps because I see so much of myself in you. You care deeply for your family, and want to protect them. You would do anything to ensure they are all safe, as I would, if they were under my protection. Look at what you've done tonight for your sister; I see no better proof than that."

"Thank you," Eliza said, suddenly feeling shy. Then, she snorted. "Wait... George is called Hopscotch? That's his pony name?" Eliza couldn't resist a small chuckle. "I haven't seen him play hopscotch like... ever."

Celestia smiled patiently. "I choose everypony's name in Equestria, and I admit that his name is more an interpretation of his personality than anything else. I noticed he does a very subtle little bounce whenever he laughs, and I couldn't help but to draw attention to it."

Eliza laughed. "He does do that, oh my gosh!"

Celestia laughed with her, and ended with a smile. "You know, he loves you deeply. If you knew how often he talks about you here, you would be floored with the embarrassment. I think all the mares are jealous," Celestia teased, with a wink.

Eliza rubbed her neck shyly. “He, uh... heh. Really? Everyone talks about me that much?"

“I don't know if you've noticed yet, but you spread joy wherever you go.” Celestia enveloped Eliza's pony with a wing, and turned to beam down at her. “It would surprise you how far one pony's influence can spread. Look at what you've done tonight for Sugar Song, and how her presence brought light and joy to her friends. Look at the compassion you show Blue Sky, which he then spreads to his friends. Think on the love you show Hopscotch, and for the undying loyalty you show your father, Open Book. You understand the fears of your uncle and mother. Many are loyal to you, as you are loyal to them. You are a good pony at heart."

“Th-thank you,” Eliza whispered, a little shaken by all the praise. “That… all means a lot to me.”

“You are most welcome, Apex.”

“Apex?”

At that moment, a flash of light seared across each side of Eliza's pony. The light subsided. On both flanks of her pony, Eliza could see a black silhouette of a howling wolf over a crescent moon. Across the bottom of the screen blinked the following text in a simple box, which faded in with a soft series of drumbeats:

BADGE GRANTED:
“And Your Talent Comes to Light”
Receive your cutie mark.
+1,000 bits

“Apex. You mentioned Hopscotch's pony name, which reminded me that I had not yet granted yours. Welcome to Equestria, my newest little pony.” She smiled brightly, and Eliza couldn't help but smile too. "Sugar Song should return soon, and I think it's best if you spend some more time with her. She needs her sister.” Celestia placed a hoof on Apex’s shoulder. “Should you ever wish to speak, I'm only a word away.”

Eliza nodded. “Thank you again for helping me with her, Celestia. I owe you.”

Celestia smiled, and gave another wink. “No you don't. Think nothing of it.” At that, she took off at a gallop, her hooves audibly kicking up snow. She extended her wings. They caught the wind, and the beautiful alabaster creature lifted from the ground with a jolt. She soared into the night sky, leaving Apex to herself in the dark woods, wolves howling in the distance.

Eliza watched the blue ghostly deer stalk in the darkness, and listened to their soft humming croon.

After Gale came back from her shower, she looked like her old self. All cleaned up, she really did look like Eliza's sister, too; the high cheeks, her lanky figure, and her long dark hair. She plopped onto the couch, and watched Eliza chase the blue shimmering animals through the woods. Eliza never quite could catch up to them.

“Where's Princess Celestia?” Gale asked.

“She left. As much as an AI can leave when it's watching you, anyway," she joked. "She gave me a name while you were away."

"Woah, really? She named you?" Gale looked over, saw the cutie mark. "A howling wolf? Wow, that's really cool. You like wolves, right?"

Eliza felt a swell of pride. "Yeah, I do. She named me Apex."

“Heh. It sounds tough, Liz.” Gale nudged Eliza. "Like you."

“You know," Eliza said, "I don’t think I ever told you. I saw some wolves take out a deer the other day.”

“Y-you what? Really?” Gale gaped.

“Yeah. I went out hunting on Wednesday to test my new bow. I was about to shoot a rabbit, and out of nowhere this wolf pack just pounced a deer up the hill. I didn't want to disturb their lunch, so I just left.”

“Gosh Liz. That’s so cool.”

“Yeah, well...” She placed the carving on the table, staring at it. The flame still flickered beyond in the fireplace. “Dad taught me everything about hunting. How to hunt, how to do it right. How to track. How to show respect for your prey, for nature. It's him, you know. He taught me everything.” Eliza frowned.

Gale’s hand touched her back. She didn't move. Gale leaned over. “What's wrong, Liz?”

“It's just... the game makes Dad nervous, but he lets us play. But Mom, and Uncle Ralph? Celestia said they just want to protect us. Andy loves you too, Gale. You know he's been crushing on you since seventh grade, right? He's not going to dump you over a video game."

Gale frowned. "I don't know, Liz..."

"They're trying to protect us,” Eliza repeated. “It's just... I can't help but feel a little wrong about uploads myself. No matter what Celestia says, I can't shake the feeling that there's something sacrilegious about it. It's Dad's influence, too. Hard to shake, I guess.”

Gale watched her patiently, letting her continue.

Eliza thought for a moment. “This kind of stuff kept me up at night, Gale. I mean, let's say someone uploads. Where does their soul go? To Heaven? But they live forever, right? But either they live forever, or they die. It's a suicide, because the body is a vessel made for the soul. So if the uploaded people are real, would the game be capturing the soul? How does it reach the afterlife? It sounds like a purgatory that never ends. But Celestia says it'll end eventually, that they'll be released somehow. And that somehow makes it okay?”

“I don't think I have the answers for you. That's between you, Celestia, and God.”

“She and I already talked about it. Celestia says a computer can keep the soul too, because it's made of the same stuff as our bodies. Dust of the earth and all that. See, this is what mom's freaking out about. And Dad, he worries about it too, even if he won’t admit it. I can tell. If he's still concerned... gosh, Gale. He's a pastor, knowing the Bible is his job. How can we not be concerned too?”

“There's a difference between concern and hate,” Gale said coldly. “Dad is acting fine, but Mom, Uncle Ralph, Andy...”

“They don't hate you, Gale. They all just think it’s tough love. They’ll all come around.”

“No offense sis, but it's going to take a long time and a lot of apology until I believe that. Especially after what Mom did the other day.”

"What Mom did was horrible." Eliza wrapped an arm around Gale. “I love you though, you know? Please don't forget that. If you ever want to talk about anything, I'm here for you. Even if I don't understand, I'll try to. I really will. I'm always here for you.”

“I love you too, Liz. And the gift is cute... I'll always cherish it.”

Eliza smiled with her. "Luna's pretty cool, huh?"

"I hear that from everypony,” Gale said. "She was so sweet to me on my first day."

"She's a bit of a snark!" Eliza giggled.

"But she's so pretty!"

"Pretty snarky," Eliza grinned. "I mean, she was funny about it, I don't mean it in a bad way." Eliza grasped the Luna sculpture gently. "You know, I made a carving like this for Tom too. It's a Christmas present for him, a nice little East Circle."

"Oh, he's gonna love that." Gale smiled.

"You gonna be there to see him open his presents tomorrow morning?"

Gale snorted. "Yeah... I guess I should be. I'll come on home in the morning, I think. I'll record him unwrapping it."

"I can’t wait," Eliza said warmly.

After a moment, Gale hugged her again. “Hey… thanks for coming by.”

Eliza squeezed her sister. “Don’t mention it. I love you, Abby.”

"I love you too, Liz."

They said their goodbyes, and Eliza left. She walked back to the truck and sighed happily as she reached for the door. She threw herself into the cabin, which was freezing, and started the engine and heater.

An apex predator. Like a wolf, hence the marking. And like a wolf, her family meant everything to her. And just like that, Eliza understood the name she’d been given, and appreciated it. It made her feel special. For the first time, Eliza fully forsook her fear of the AI, and began to respect her.

For now, it felt good.

Author's Note

[Yasuharu Takanashi - The Plight of the Adventurer]

🌒 ~ Of these two sisters, Apex had never bowed to me... and I consider my station and title to be a boundary between myself and others. Seldom has one so boldly and confidently stepped through it to me.