The C̸̞̙̭̽̌̀̈́̽̕̕ȗ̵̧̨̢̻̩̞̘͙̉̋̊͂͘ŕ̷͖̦̍͝s̵̫̪̋̍͂̆̆͆̄é̶̡̧̺͖d̸͎͒̒̿̈̀ Apocalypse

“You gotta be fuckin' kidding me.”

“No, D. I’m not … unfortunately.”

I rubbed my head frustratingly before Dash helped me to a stand. She helped keep me balanced as I limped over to the station. I eased up the stairs and made my way inside to find Fluttershy sobbing next to Discord, who was trying to calm her. AJ was pacing along the back wall of the station, gritting her teeth.

I walked closer to see Fluttershy with her wing up. Discord was helping her hold it, as they had mentioned their wings were very heavy now. There was a bullet skim near her belly … but on her side above it was a nasty bruise, and upon closer viewing, teeth marks. I hadn’t actually saved her back at the hospital. She looked up at me with teary blue eyes, causing me to turn back around.

“D?”

I passed Dash and walked back down the steps. I took a moment to stand at the bottom of them and stare off in the distance, where the tracks disappeared behind a crest in the hill.

Author.

Yes?

Can I have a word with you?

Uh… yeah? You’re having that right now. What is it?

Can I ask you a question?

You better not be asking me what’s going on elsewhere.

I’m not.

Then what is it?

What’s your fucking problem?!

Excuse you. That’s no way to talk to a god, D’mitry. What’s your problem?

I’m getting sick of your bullshit. Why did you spawn these shitheads in anyway? Have we not suffered enough without you FUCKING us over every GODDAMN second of the day?

D’mitry—chill the fuck out. That’s not how this works, bonehead. I’m not ‘spawning’ in the boys. They exist in this universe and follow the path they are destined.

But you created them, right?

Yes.

Dumbass god. Shoulda created a boot in your own ass too.

Lightning bolt.

I tensed up angrily before shaking off this typical shock.

I know you’re upset, D’mitry, but you have to understand… I can’t just solve all your problems and make your life peachy easy. You have to move on, and traverse the life laid out for you.

I don’t want to anymore.

Well that’s too damn bad!

Seriously. This life is growing meaningless. If shit keeps going the way it’s going, it looks like you’ve destined us all to just die, one by one, until this world is seeped and ripped clean of its beautiful, magical existence.

No… no, I don’t feel like playing your little game anymore.

You’re thinking way too deep right now.

I don’t care. I’m not going to follow the ‘script’ anymore.

What fucking script? Just do what you think is best, which is obviously not arguing with God. Go back inside and see Fluttershy.

No.

D’mitry…

I unholstered my pistol.

What are you doing?

I pulled out my baby, and set the barrel to my head.

D’mitry!!!

“D!!! DON’T!” Dash called from behind.

Let’s see what happens now, Author!! What? Are you going to strike me?! My fingers against the trigger, motherfucker! You know what that means, right?! You strike me, and then what?? That’s right!! I TENSE UP AND PULL THE TRIGGER! So HUMOR ME!!!

D’mitry, just listen, alright? There’s a lot of stuff coming up in your life, some bad, and some good, but you have to understand that that's life. It’s your life. Why would you want to take that away?

I started breathing heavily. The cold barrel rested against the side of my head, waiting to send a bullet shredding through it. My finger sweat inside the trigger. Dash made her way to stand in front of me, a look of shock on her face.

“D, please, please don’t. I’m begging you, please. It’ll be alright, I promise.”

I took another deep breath, bothered by Dash’s sorrow. I heard the Author lower his tone somehow.

I'm talking to just you right now. Dash and the others can't hear me. That being said, D’mitry... I created you. I created this life for you. Do you know how much this hurts me too? I don’t want you to die. I don’t want anybody to die, but the timeline must be followed. If we stray too far from it, the universe might collapse on itself. Then EVERYBODY’s life ends. You don’t want that to happen, do you?

I glanced down at Dash, her frightened expression bringing a tear to my eye.

They need you, D’mitry. You’ve grown far too close to them to just give up now.

The tear rolled down my cheek. My heart ached. The Author was right.

“Ok, whatever,” I replied, setting the gun down and rubbing my belly. “I’m kinda hungry. You got any snacks in your bag, Dash?”

Dash looked up at me confusingly.

“What the fucks wrong with you, D?”

“I’m hungry.”

“Fucks sake. Don’t scare me like that again! Asshole. I do have a Snickers, though.”

“I love Snickers!”

“Here,” she said, digging the Snickers out of her bag and passing it to me. “You aren’t being yourself anyway. Eat it, you suicidal bastard.”

“Thanks, cuzzo.”

“Oh lord, please don’t give me that nickname.”

“Too late, cuzzo!”

She shook her head and sighed as I munched into the candy bar. While I did, she went to tell the others about Fluttershy. I walked past Twi as she led her inside the station, and I made my way to the dead boys. I gathered all of their guns from their murky red pools, grinning wickedly as I ran out of places to hold them and their magazines of ammo on my body.

When I was done, I was carrying three backpacks awkwardly, with magazines slung around my neck and waist. There was one last revolver on the ground next to one of the downed sidekicks. I carefully reached down for it and…

CRASH

God damn it. I dropped all my new fucking gear. I heard hoofsteps as I tried to upright myself with two backpacks holding me down.

“Jesus,” Lyra commented, “You tryna start a militia, human?”

“Gah, no,” I replied, releasing myself from the backpacks and sitting up on my knees. Lyra caught sight of my hand again, so she aggressively reached down and pulled it up, observing my fingers intently. I tried pulling back on them, but she pulled them back harder, adamant about looking at them. I managed to curl my other fingers up, effectively flipping her off before finally pulling my hand back.

“Sorry, force of habit,” she stated.

“Jesus. Did ya get a good look at ‘em?”

“Eh… sorta. Why? Want me to see them again?”

“No, but you see…” I said, raising my hands between us and wiggling my fingers. “…these are what pull the trigger of the guns y’all got.”

“Okay? So?”

“So… how the HELL did you do that?!”

“Do what?” she asked, her eyes still glued to my fingers.

“That!” I exclaimed, pointing at one of the boys she shot. I had to dramatically wave my finger around for her to shake off her daze and look where I was pointing.

“Oh,” she replied, “I wanna say it’s due to my hoof flexibility.”

I squinted my eyes confusingly. “Hoof flexibility?”

“Yeah, check it out,” she said, raising her right hoof.

She then squeezed the bottom of it, causing an edge of her hoof to curl slightly. Now… this was bizarre. I’d seen the magic hooves of this world, noting ponies’ ability to grab and hold things, but this? This was something strange. I looked on for another few seconds before she uncurled it and set it down.

“Jesus,” I commented.

“Oh yeah. I’ve been working on it for a while now. Got a mean little hook grip goin’ on.”

“Damn…”

She smirked and leaned forward, setting her snout beside my ear and whispering, “It’s pretty good at… gripping…”

She backed up, snickering like a little devil.

“Bruh, what? I thought you were a lesbian.”

“Shush!” she exclaimed, checking behind her. The others weren’t nearby though. She shook her head and looked back at me. “I am, idiot. Me and Bon-bon just experiment a bit. Anyway, that brings up a point. Bon-bon has showed me how to use her new, improved grappling hook, which has the same kinda trigger, albeit larger. By the way, as I've told you before, you reveal this secret to anyone, and Bon-bon will have to assassinate you. Just a reminder. As for my aim though, lots of practice using her grappling hook must have transferred to these new guns of ours. It almost feels natural.”

I thought for a moment before replying, “Experimenting?”

“Oh my god,” she groaned, facehoofing. “Nevermind.”

“Okay. Well, nice shooting, Tex.”

“Uh… thanks?”

She smiled warily before walking back to the others. I stood back up. I was still a bit queasy, so I decided to leave the slew of gear in the messy pile I’d formed. I started pacing a little bit, still upset by the thought of Fluttershy dying soon. Thinking about her bite reminded me of mine, so I rolled up my sleeve to check it out.

What the fuck?

There was the bruise, but where were the teeth marks? I checked all over, but there was nothing. It had vanished. Did this mean I was immune or something? I hadn’t turned into a zombie … as far as I could tell … and I didn’t feel sick at all, besides this damn leg. Hmm. I guess it didn’t matter now. I made my way back to the station, hearing Discord inside.

“Don’t tell me to calm down!! Imbecile.”

Inside, AJ was talking with Discord in an attempt to calm him down. It wasn’t working, obviously. Nurse Redheart had finished up with Cloud and Rarity already, so she worked on cleaning up Fluttershy’s bite as Twi sat next to them assisting. Fluttershy eyed me with sad eyes when I limped in. I sat against the wall next to her and sighed.

“Was it at the hospital?” I asked.

“Well, duh,” she answered, “What, you think I got bit in here?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know what the hell’s even going on anymore.”

“Jesus, D’mitry,” Twi said, “It’s not that confusing. She got bit at the hospital, unfortunately, and we keep getting attacked by other humans. It’s probably Celestia and Luna bringing them in, if I had to guess.”

“I just can’t figure anything out!” I exclaimed, dramatically throwing my hands up in the air.

“Celestia have mercy.”

“Humm,” I stated, rubbing my temple. “I’m sorry, Fluttershy.”

“It’s alright. Twilight’s working on a plan now, so we’re prepared for… you know…”

“Okay,” I replied, turning to Twi. “So, what now?”

“We’re gonna head back to the hospital so everybody can get fully checked out. After that, we’ll see how everyone is and go from there.”

“Awe damn, I was really looking forward to walking all the way to fucking Canterlot.”

“Yeah yeah yeah.”

Once Redheart was done working on Fluttershy, Twi did a status check. Everybody was relatively okay to move now, so we started heading back to the hospital. Overall, Redheart did a fantastic job patching everypony’s wounds, and luckily nobody died.

Not yet at least…