The C̸̞̙̭̽̌̀̈́̽̕̕ȗ̵̧̨̢̻̩̞̘͙̉̋̊͂͘ŕ̷͖̦̍͝s̵̫̪̋̍͂̆̆͆̄é̶̡̧̺͖d̸͎͒̒̿̈̀ Apocalypse

Something weird was going on.

You know… besides me somehow being partially conscious in an unconscious state again. It felt as though I was in a dream, but nothing was happening. Everything was black. I was… here?... but not really. I couldn’t look around… I just kind of existed.

After a minute of this strange existence, weird, bubbly lights floated around my… vision? These lights only took a few seconds to start flashing all around me. The white and light blue ones overshadowed the rest, dancing around as they rapidly lit up and dimmed in brightness.

This effect was joined by an odd sound filling my ears. A weird, hum-like noise. The hum grew with various frequencies of bass accompanying it. The sound faded in and out, adding to the chaos of the lights still dancing in my vision. A weird creaking sound began dancing around my headspace to add to this.

As the lights and sounds wrapped around my brain, I felt a pain stab through it. It hit me hard, like a migraine that had no build-up to it. This aching led to a wave rushing down my nervous system, sending a chill through my body so violent that I blinked open my eyes. The dancing lights weakened but remained in my vision. New, bright white lights overhead replaced them, nearly blinding me.

I squinted my eyes. The humming, bass, and creaking had died down as well, replaced by weird beeps and muffled voices. I heard some kinda alarm going off by my right side. Blinking my eyes allowed me to vaguely adjust to the light, and as I did… a blurry human head appeared in front of it.

A doctor.

Or a surgeon? I don’t know. All I know is that he had a mask, goggles, and hospital cap on. He looked me in the eyes, but I still couldn’t see all that well. My heart sped up rapidly, and the humming grew again. The doctor/surgeon moved his head back out of sight, causing the bright light to grow in my vision again. I closed my eyes, trying to fight away the growing light and sound overwhelming my senses. It grew and grew until I couldn’t take it anymore and-

AHHHHH!!!

Everything suddenly stopped. The lights and sounds disappeared as I jolted… awake?

I shot open my eyes, my heartbeat accelerating viciously. The blinding light was gone as well, replaced by some kind of roof.

“Whoa whoa whoa, hun, relax.”

I turned my head to see Nurse Snowheart on my side, fiddling with something. I stared at her for a solid few seconds to relax, coming back to reality. Glancing behind her, I realized we were on the floor of one of the subway-styled train cars.

As I looked back at Snow, I felt the pain in my abdomen from before return. It wasn’t a terrible pain, but it was definitely uncomfortable. It didn’t help that I could feel it exposed, being attacked by ambient air. Raising my head allowed me to see that my shirt was pulled up, exposing it.

It wasn’t covered in red blood anymore—my skin was actually clean. On top of this, the bullet wound was already covered up with a taped-on, puffy gauze bandage. While I observed this, another female voice spoke from behind and startled me.

“So… is he alright to wake up? I can knock him out again, if you need,” Jen said.

I sat my head back down and looked up to see her hovering over the back of me, on her knees. She looked down at me with them sparkly ocean-colored eyes and smiled.

Snow replied, “You can knock him out later. He’s good for now.”

Jen kept her eyes locked on me, her smile staying. “Awe, dang. Was hopin’ I could knock some sense into him.”

I glanced up at her confusingly before using my hands to slowly start sitting back up.

“Whoa, hun,” Snow said, sticking her hoof out in front of my chest to stop me. “Just lay back for now. Your wound needs some time to heal.”

“Yeah,” I laughed, “right.”

I resumed slowly sitting back up, pushing back against her restraining foreleg.

“Hun!”

I was winning too, until two hands grabbed my shoulders and forcefully shoved me back to the floor. Even though we were on the floor, I could feel some kinda soft surface beneath me, like a blanket. As much as I enjoyed the comfort of this blanket on my back, I didn’t enjoy the hands on my shoulders.

“Let go, bitch!” I scoffed, glaring up at Jen.

She didn’t.

“Just listen to the nurse, dickhead. You can relax right now. Your pony friends are fine.”

“They are? Where are they?”

“We had a little zombie incident. After you passed out, we started getting jumped by them. They musta heard the gunshots from that shoot-out we had. The others pulled you in here, but they’re outside now, cleaning up the rest of the mess and attempting to drive some of ‘em away.”

“What?! I need to help them!” I exclaimed, pushing up against her restraining hands. For a second, she released one of them, only to use it to punch my forehead. The pain that stemmed from this blow was uncomfortable enough for me to quit fighting back. She returned her hand back on top of my other shoulder to continue holding me down.

“No, you don’t. I don’t understand why you’re so gung-ho all the time.”

Nurse Snow giggled. “None of us do.”

“Get off!” I retaliated.

“Princess Celestia said you’d probably fight back. She told me to tell her if you were causing issues, so she can, you know, spank you. Want me to?” Jen mocked.

I quit fighting back and blankly stared up at her.

“Bitch.”

She snickered, that stupid smile returning on her face. “This is fun. I kinda like holding you down.”

…

What?

I squinted my eyes in confusion, wondering why this bitch was acting so flirty. I didn’t like it. I mean… it’s not like… well… I don’t know… it’s just…

…

Fine… I’ll admit it. Jen is hot as fuck. I’d been ignoring this since we first met at the castle, seeing as though she’d always been an enemy. But now, it was harder to ignore this. I hated the fact that her face and body were both resounding 10s. It didn’t help that her young, perky tits were hanging above my face now.

“I’m gonna hold you down when I murder y’all,” I retaliated.

She rolled her eyes. “You aren’t gonna murder us, idiot. I know you’re just trying to intimidate us.”

“I! I-”

Mmm… I hate to admit it, but I think she’s right. As easy as it was to slaughter the boys just now, I don’t think I could bring myself to kill the girls as easily anymore. Mayyyyyyyyyybe Abby, since she’s still bein’ a bitch… kinda…

…but honestly, now that I think about it, I was looking into the eyes of another murderer. I was looking at my equal. I got a tingly feeling in my stomach—one that probably wasn’t due to my wound—and started wondering if Jen and Abby would actually kill me in a 2v1. I did have my chainsaw, but if they were willing to brutally stab their former ally to death, I doubt they’d hesitate in blowing my head off with a bullet.

Damn.

I huffed. “So how long am I going to be held prisoner?”

“As long as it takes,” she answered.

“Ugh.”

This is ridiculous. This was even worse than the 16-hour shifts I had to pull at Sweet Apple Acres occasionally. At least back then, I was kinda free. I won’t go into loads of detail taking up multiple upcoming paragraphs, but my job at Sweet Apple Acres was more maintenance-related.

You see, since I wasn’t a pony that could buck the living shit out of trees, there wasn’t a place for me in the regular harvesting position. It was still a bit amusing, at least to AJ and her family, when we experimented during the first few weeks to see what my capabilities were. I’d even damn near broke my leg when we tested my bucking strength.

That wasn’t meant to be, but they found a LOT of use out of me in maintenance. I would walk around the orchard with my dumb little step-ladder, climbing up trees like the monkey I am to tend to them, making sure the soon-to-be-ripe apples would fall with no problems. Apparently, this was extremely effective in mitigating ‘apples-still-stuck-in-the-tree’ loss.

‘What is ‘apples-still-stuck-in-the-tree’ loss?’, you ask.

I’m pretty sure they can figure that one out themselves.

Probably, but let me explain in exaggerated detail. So ‘apples-sti-…

…

…

I was pulled from my thoughts when Jen began rubbing my shoulders. I glanced up at her, noticing she was still trying to burn holes in my retinas with her sparkly, ocean-colored eyes. She smiled teasingly as she slowly rubbed back and forth. It felt really good, which pissed me off. As much as my shoulders wanted her to continue, I didn’t. I was also starting to fight off a boner.

“Stop,” I whispered.

“Shhhhhh.”

I looked away in hopes of winning the battle in my pants as I endured this torture for a little longer. Thankfully, the battle was interrupted when we heard a ruckus grow from outside the cabin. Jen finally released her hands, allowing me to sit up on my elbows to see.

First through the doorway of the car came Twi, followed quickly by Trix and Blaze. I noticed that both of them were carrying another pegasus with a bright cyan-colored mane and tail over their backs. It took me a second to realize it was Flitter, the mare who hung around Cloud all the time. I woulda noticed her sooner if she had her bright pink bow on her head, but she didn't. I’d remembered seeing her at the hospital before our Canterlot adventure, so it was odd seeing her here.

“Snow!” Twi called, leading the others toward us. “We need you! She’s bad!”

Dash and Trix ran up with her and gently set Flitter down by my legs. She looked exhausted, and also pretty raggedy, as if she’d been rolling around outside. I realized she did have her bright pink bow, but it was untied and wrapped around her chest like a makeshift bandage. It was more pink-red now, as blood could be seen seeping through it. Snow wasted no time in turning her attention from me to her.

“What’s wrong??” she asked.

“She was shot!”

“Shot?” Snow repeated, carefully inspecting the cloth-like thing.

“Yes! Not recently. She was shot yesterday. She’s been fighting since then.”

Snow hastily checked over her before replying, “Did you give her any water?”

“No.”

“Bruh.”

…

That bruh wasn’t even from me. Snow uttered it this time. She then quickly dug in her bag for a water bottle and hoof-fed Flitter some water. As she did, I began interrogating Twi.

“How the fuck was she shot yesterday? Who shot her?”

“Who do you think?”

…

“Wait…”

I realized now that everypony looked nervous as fuck. Especially Dash. Twi was similarly distressed-looking, and after hearing this, I started putting 2 and 2 together.

“Yeah,” Twi continued, “we got some pretty bad news.”

“Bad news?”

“Yeah… unfortunately.”

Trix huffed as she glanced over at Twi. “Would you just fucking tell him? Rip the bandage off.”

Twi huffed as well before looking back at me. “The hospital was attacked by a group of boys while we were gone.”

…

…

…

I felt my brain short out for a second while an intense, agitated fury roared through it. I’d just had the satisfaction of gunning down the group of boys that ambushed us, as well as sawing those last two to death… but there were still more? Of course there were. I clenched my fists by my side.

These fucking degenerate pieces of shit were getting on my last fucking nerve, almost making the actual zombie apocalypse seem like not a big deal, seeing as we always gotta dEAL WITH THEIR FUCKING BULLSHAAFAWGA
HWIUHFAU IWHFUIWHAFHWHAFH AWFHWAUIFHBA!! WUIFH IUW AHFACHAINSAWKAWHDA WDAWHKUD, HWKDH AWUKD-HWUAKDAWKU UKAWHD. 'NKUCHAINSAWAW'... NFUKB QWOFKNQ! WIFKNQKWDQI?? 'WLDM'?! OQWFJ... OQHFIQWODJOQ... WJDNQWOFJ!!! NQCHAINSAWWDJ!! QOWFW!! JFOQWFJOQ!!!! JFQOWFJ QOWDJKQOW DKOQCHAINSAWD!!! JQW! IODJQOW DJQWODJQOWDJ QOWJDO, QWJDOQWDO, QWDCHAINSAWWW!!!!!!

I could not contain the rage within me any longer. I’d planned to stand up and… I don’t know… rage? However, Jen caught on to this and forcefully grabbed my shoulders to hold me back before I could. When I started spontaneously raging and fought to sit up, Twi and Trix both joined her in holding me down.

“See?” Twi scoffed, “This is why I didn’t wanna tell him that directly.”

“Oh whatever, princess. He’d react the same anyway,” Trix retorted.

The two of them bickered a little bit until the others returned from their little zombie adventure outside. Celestia, in particular, broke them up and ordered me to calm down. This allowed them to explain what Flitter had told them.

So, last nigh-

They know.

…

What?

They already know. Perspective shifted a while back so they could watch it happen.

…

Bruh. And y’all didn’t say anything?!

And how the fuck would they go about doing that, D’mitry?

I… I don’t know.

Yeah. Quit breaking the fourth wall and skip the backstory.

Fine. Would it really be a fourth wall, thoug-

Lightning bolt.

AHHHHHH!