A moment with Dr Wolf: Spike
Dr. Wolf sat down in his office chair, finally getting one befitting his size and shape and was enjoying a cup of tea while he relaxes. He had some time before his next patient. Normally the patients he sees set up an appointment for themselves a head of time or in some cases they are walk-ins who need his help in the moment rather than later. In this case however it was one of the few rare times that someone else made the appointment for them. A set up the wolf generally disliked because he doesn’t want to make anyone uncomfortable by being forced to speak to him about their troubles. Even though he was fairly certain that if they didn’t have someone do it for them, they would never do it at all. In this case however, Dr. Wolf was fairly certain that the person was given a strong nudge than a forceful push.
Getting his notepad at the ready, he straightens himself to look presentable. And soon there was a knock at the door, “Come in.” He answered. The door swung open revealing a small dragon no bigger than the wolf was. He had purple scales with a bright green accents for his quills and plats forming what would be hair on a pony. “Ah, Good afternoon Spike. Twilight said you would becoming shortly. Please, have a seat.” He offered.
Spike still hanging his head low as if he had be caught eating snacks before dinner, struggles a bit as he manages to climb on top of the couch and sat down. “I’m not a wacko. I don’t really think I need this.”
Dr. Wolf simply smiled only mentally rolling his eyes as he had heard that statement many times already. “Well...I know this kind of thing can make ponies... er dragons,” He quickly corrected himself, “uncomfortable. But Twilight insisted that this has been troubling for you sometime. And you needed worry about your state of mind. Despite the negative stereotypes, there are plenty of people who are of sound mind but like you, are having trouble and they need a listening ear without fear of judgment. I strive to create a safe and welcoming environment. Just take your time and tell me what’s on your mind.”
Spike scratched his forehead a bit thinking about how best to start, “Well...it’s, um...you’re not gonna tell anyone are you?”
“Of course not, I have something call a doctor patient confidentiality, It’s basically means I’m not allowed to talk about anything in this office with anyone else. Doing so breaks that trust, there are lots of others who have a fear of what other ponies would say if they found out. And that does kind of defeat the point of a place without judgment.”
“Okay...thanks doc. Um...I guess, it’s this pony I have feelings for. Her name is Rarity.” Spike started.
“Ah yes, the ever talented seamstress.” Dr Wolf commented causally.
“She’s so amazing, and well... I fell in love with her since the day I moved to Ponyville, she’s beautiful, so talented with her outfits. I do anything for her. Every so often when I’m not helping Twilight, I’m helping her run her shop. Every other Saturday I help her go gem hunting.” the young dragon explains.
“I see, go on.” the wolf continued.
“But lately...I don’t know really how to feel. I never thought about it until recently. I mean I know we’re different, and I know I’m younger than her and right now I’m scared of loosing her. But then I started thinking about what I have been doing and now I’m starting to question if what I feel for her is real at all.”
“Oh my, I imagine that must be confusing for you. If I might ask, have you spoken to Rarity about your feelings? Told her how you feel?”
“That’s just it, I’ve been so scared to. I mean...there was one time where I almost tried to but she stopped me, it’s kind of a long story but we were kind of falling and I was afraid we weren’t gonna make it. She looked me in the eyes and...she knew, at least...I thought she knew. Now I’m not so sure. I mean we’ve always been supportive of each other. She’s often went along with Twilight when they follow me whenever something related to dragons comes up with me. And well like I said I’ve helped her out plenty of times.”
Dr. Wolf listened to his words thinking about how best to help the baby dragon, “Well, I know confessing such feelings can be a nerve racking experience, especially for someone your age. But you mentioned having doubts about the sincerity of these feelings. Can you think of an example of what is making you doubt them?”
“Well...that time I said we were falling? Well...you see dragons can sometimes grow really big if we starting collecting a huge horde of stuff. It happened on my first birthday here in Ponyville, and I got a lot more stuff than I had ever gotten before, next thing I knew my greedy dragon instincts got the better of me and well...I kind of terrorized the whole town. I don’t remember a lot of it, but apparently I kidnapped Rarity and it finally took her reminding me of the fire-heart ruby I gave her, something I had wanted so much but I gave to her because I know it would have made her happy. She didn’t even know it was me until I shrank back down. And then...there was this other time when...well your not gonna believe this but I followed Twilight through this magic mirror world cause we chased after this unicorn named Sunset Shimmer.” Spike explains.
“Oh I believe you Spike, I have spoken to Ms. Shimmer once before and Twilight has mentioned her in our conversations. I may not fully understand the alternate world ideas but yes I do believe you.” Dr Wolf explains choosing his words carefully.
“Well...I saw that Rarity too, and she was just beautiful and amazing as the one I know. But I had to constantly remind myself that she’s not the one I know. Then I got to thinking...and I’m worried if whether or not my feelings for my Rarity are real or just a dumb crush. I can barely remember what I did during my greed growth and I did apologize for what happened. Rarity was even proud of me, called me her hero for able to let go and stop myself. I know my friends means more to me than just stuff. But what does that say about me?”
The doctor pauses, like many others he doesn’t know very much about the dragon culture so he could speculate at best, He also wisely choose not tell him that he distinctly remembered Spike’s rampage because whether he remembered or not, Spike at one point trashed Dr Wolf’s office tearing whole in the wall and stealing his chair and couch. Of course at the time the psychologist had only recently moved into the location and hadn’t quite learn of everything going on in Ponyville, So his reaction was more of shock and awe that a real dragon was even in the town to begin with,
“Well, there is something you should keep in mind. When you were in that state of mind, you were acting on instinct, so of course when you...took Rarity, you again saw her as something you wanted. We all have envies and desires but I believe what happened to you was as you said, your instincts taking over, and they are very basic and primal. You wanted it, you had the power to take it, so you did. However I can say with certainty that Rarity was right to praise you. I’m glad you understand as few people tend to forget the idea of not treating women like objects. I think the act alone of learning to let things go and wanting her to be happy is a sign of true affection rather that clinging on to her as an obsession. There is and old saying, ‘if you love them, you set them free.’ And again it is very confusing yet understandable that you felt similar feelings to the alternate Rarity, and that is a larger problem than I think most people would know how to deal with meeting someone who looks just like the ones you know, so for you to have the mental and emotional discipline to remind yourself that there is a difference proves that you have more genuine feelings about your Rarity. Because if you were to peruse a relationship with say...Sweetie Belle, it would be one thing if you had real feelings for her, but if you dated Sweetie Belle solely on the idea that she is Rarity’s sister, or even expecting to her to be like Rarity, that would be selfish, it would be unfair to Sweetie Belle and you. Was there any other time you could think of when you actually had to be put aside your infatuation for Rarity for something important?” He asks.
Spike took a moment to think, “Yeah, I feel kind of bad as I felt it was kind of my fault to begin, see I gave her a magic book once called the Inspiration Manifestation, I didn’t know that it would do something to her like that. She got addicted to the power of being able to change anything she wanted and started turning everything into gems and crystals! I mean I love those as much as the next dragon but even I know things were getting out of hoof. She was so out of it she thought she was making improvements to everything and...well I finally got the courage to tell her the truth. I didn’t say anything it first because...I just wanted to be a supportive friend…it wasn’t the first time I did something stupid to try and win her affection. We apologized and got everything turned back to normal. She reminded me that I should never be afraid to tell her truth because we’re good friends. Of course...I still paid for it cause I actually ate the book. Let’s just say...that was one of the few things that a dragon stomach couldn’t handle.” The little dragon felt queezy remembering that moment.
Dr. Wolf rubs his chin for a moment adjusting his glasses, “I have to wonder, you have displayed lots of labor of love for her, has she shown any return signs of interest? I would assume she would be generous to at least compensate you for all your efforts in helping her.”
“Totally! She knows how hard it is for me being a dragon not to munch on gems so she makes sure I get my fair share and usually saves me a really big nice one for me as a reward. She usually knows how much I love to eat so she usually gets me a snack. And well...” he turns a bit pink in the cheeks putting his claw on it at the memory, “She did kiss me once for giving up my fire ruby to her and later when I managed to turn myself back from being a greedy giant. And she has defended me when I got into a fight some bully dragons during the Great Dragon Migration. And she followed along with Twilight when I helped my friend Ember.”
Dr. Wolf smiles and then other question pops into his head, “Why don’t we put your troubles with Rarity aside for the moment. Are there any other girls you have such feelings for?”
Spike took a moment to think, “Not really, I mean...I like the girls okay. Rainbow Dash and I hang out sometimes. Starlight Glimmer and me are pretty cool. Twilight well...she’s like my sister, sometimes a mom to me. The only one I could kind of think of besides maybe Starlight is Princess Ember, she’s actually another dragon and I even gave up the role of Dragon Lord to her.”
“Dragon Lord?”
“It’s a high honor, it’s basically similar to Celestia and Luna’s role only for Dragons.” Spike explains. “I figured Ember could do a much better job at it then I could. I still got a lot of growing up to do. She and I hang out sometimes, I get to tell her what’s it like being among ponies and she’s been telling me what it’s really like being a dragon. At first I didn’t really care about being a dragon anymore because thanks to Garble and his friends, it seems like they were nothing but big bullies and treating everyone else like dirt. Ember said that was a terrible first impression and yeah at first glance it does sometimes geso that route. In fact she told me that what happened with the my greed growth is one of the reasons why we dragons invented games like King of the Horde, it’s to help tame our growth to prevent what I did. She actually admits that because I got that huge, despite the trouble I caused, was probably for the best because I got it all out my system so I don’t ever have to go through it again so long as I keep what I get down to a minimum or at least wait a bit before I get another gift. And I admit Ember’s kind cute, a lot of the girls teased me saying she was my dragon girl friend but...not even Ember makes me feel like Rarity does.” He sighs wistfully thinking about her.
“You mention worrying about losing her, I assume you mean her pursuing relationships with other stallions? Or just no longer being friends with her?” The wolf asks.
“Both I guess, I mean...First there was Prince Blueblood, the jerk. I didn’t think about it at the time because we were still new in town. But then there was Trenderhoof, and that really got to me a little bit. Everyone could tell her dreams were gonna end badly, but I still tried to help her win his heart despite how I felt but it was really hard especially because she asked how I could know what it’s like obsessing over someone who doesn’t return their feelings. She was so upset because Trenderhoof had a crush on Applejack instead. At the time I just gave an annoyed look cause... yeah, I do get it. And yeah, I’m scared about ruining our friendship. She might say no and then things will be weird between us. But then I got to thinking about what happens when I grow up, I mean it’ll be forever if I wait to be an adult if I can literally just sleep away 100 years and just call it a nap. What happens when I out live her? And sometimes I’m so afraid about how I feel, I don’t know if I really like her or if it’s just ‘Spike wants!’ I don’t know if I’ll ever get over that with anyone.” Spike tries to answer and tried to mimic his deep voice.
The Doctor listens taking notes down as he does so, considering what Spike was going through and knowing little of it, he sighs and tries to offer his best advice, “Well, the only thing I could suggest is to perhaps seek out another dragon, Maybe Princess Ember or more preferably one who is older and in a seriously relationship to help you deal with those concerns, but from what you have told me today Spike, it sounds like you have already proven time and again that what you feel for Rarity is real, and again you have shown a great deal of maturity at your age be it pony or dragon that you have those fears and concerns, and willing to give up your own feelings to make her happy. Yes while out living a loved one is hard, you face that struggle even if the person is only 2-3 years older or younger than you be it dragon years or not. It’s a tragic thing, the best advice I can give you Spike is that you make do with the time you have with that someone special be it Rarity or not, and when the time comes, its alright to grieve but don’t dwell on what was lost but be grateful for the time you had.
I wouldn’t wish to put pressure on you, but what I will suggest is when the time comes when you want to tell Rarity how you feel, be ready to have the courage to face that rejection. If and when it does happen, try to find peace in the fact that you finally know for sure. An old saying goes ‘Tis better to love and loss, than to never love at all.’ after all 100 years is a long time sitting in a cave asking yourself...’what if’. You’ll never know if Rarity does feel the same way until you tell her.” The wolf lowers his head solemnly, “You have shown great respect in letting Rarity go because you care about her and don’t wish to own her like a trinket, and just like with Trenderhoof, if she does reject your feelings, you’ll have to have to just accept it and have the strength to move on. It takes a great deal of courage to admit your feelings and a great deal of selflessness to accept her feelings and respect her choices, if she doesn’t wish to be with you.”
“But...what do I do? How do I not make it awkward if it doesn’t work out?” Spike wonders.
Dr. Wolf sighs, “It will take time, respect her space when she asks, try to keep things just on a mutual friendly level. I hope that things will play out that the two of you can remain good friends even if she doesn’t love you in return. There are tragic times when ponies who make those confessions and get so hurt by rejections they get into fights and the complete reverse happens. But if you can follow my advice and learn to accept her decision whatever that might be with the grace and maturity you have shown previously, you should be able to avoid that pain. Do you think you can do that for me Spike?”
Spike nods, “Yeah, I think I can. Thanks Doc. And maybe I will go ask some dragons about it. Maybe after I get some closure about my hording problem, I might feel better about myself enough to finally get the courage to ask Rarity. I can’t be any worse off than I already am. You really helped me out. Oh and hey...the wolf thing? Don’t let it get to ya, I mean if ponies are cool with a dragon, they’ll totally be cool with a wolf. Especially with someone as cool as you. Thanks again Doc.” He gets up as they shake hands.
“Glad to be of help. And if you ever need a listening ear, my door is always open.” Dr. Wolf smiles.
“Sure, and hey, if you need help around the office, I’m always willing to lend a claw. Us little guys gotta stick together.” Spike beams.
“Indeed. I shall keep that in mind. Take care Spike.” The wolf waves as Spike takes his leave with a closing of the door.
The Doctor sighs warmly as he turns around looking at picture of his Lady, “Hmm...ah to be so in love and young. Good luck little knight, maybe you win fair lady’s heart.” He takes a deep sigh letting it out slowly, “It’s good to be helping.”
Author's Note
I know Dr. Wolf is planning on doing a video with Spike with script already written but since I don't know when it's gonna come out or what it will be about, I wanted to try my take on how he would help Spike with his feelings for Rarity. Hope you enjoy.
Update: There is offical Moment with Spike video out, go check it out as it's really good. ^.^