A Doll's Life For Me

by MyWorld93

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Twilight Sparkle, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Romance, Big Macintosh
Length: 7809

The life of a human in a doll in equestria. There are so many ins.

One moment, you’re a human being living a fairly normal life. You have family, you have friends, and you have fun. You enjoy yourself. The next, you’re a doll stuck on the shelf in a world of ponies. Is this someone’s idea of a joke?
My name is Normad. Welcome to the world of Equestria. I hope you had a good trip.

Published 2012-07-06 10:14:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-07-06 10:14:02 UTC

All Dolled Up

Disclaimer: Welcome friends to a brand new story. Since some of you might not know who I am let me introduce myself, I am the disclaimer. It's my job to make sure you know a few things about the author. However, we have another guest today. Hope she can do a good job. Please give a big hand to VANILLA!

A girl with pale blue hair wearing a white military uniform stands under the spotlight, "..."

Disclaimer: Vanilla, are you there?

A young blue-haired girl with bunny ears walks onto the stage, "Sorry about this, she tends to be pretty quiet."

Disclaimer: Of course Mint. Since you're here, would you mind translating for her?

"Of course!" She turns to face the readers, "Please note, MyWorld93 does not own the rights to any MLP characters used in this story, they belong to Hasbro and Lauren Faust. Galaxy Angel character belong to Bandai and Broccoli."

Vanilla's mouth opens a bit, "When reading A Doll's Life For Me make sure you're in a bright room and well away from the screen, it is G-d's will."

Disclaimer: Good job you two. Though I think Vanilla might get me in trouble.

All Dolled Up

Written by MyWorld93

Prereaders: RandomEncounter, Flutteringshy, and Meliron

Editor: Not on this site, but I want to thank her anyway

“Hey Mom!” My voice reverberates through the house, bouncing off the walls.

Waiting for a reply, I bend down and tie my shoelaces, but before I could finish the first loop, My Mother’s reply comes racingfrom the kitchen, “Yes Normad?!”

Finishing up one my shoe laces, I begin to tie the other one as I reply back to her, “Just want to let you know that I’m heading out to meet with some friends. I’ll be back later.”

“Okay dear. Have fun. Remember to be back by six. We promised to have a family dinner tonight.”

“No problem, Mom!” Finishing with my shoe laces, I stand and run for the door, planning my next actions carefully. I’ll jump onto my skateboard and ride it straight out of the door onto the sidewalk. It will look so cool!

“Wait up Normad! I want to come!” The sound of my younger sister, Melissa, exuberantly yelling at me reaches my ears right as I’m on the threshold of leaving. I wonder if it’s worth it to continue walking out of here and deal with my sister later? Nah, not only will I get an earful for that, but I don’t think I can do that kind of thing to my sister.

Feeling the sensation of something running into me, I glance downwards towards her. I suppose I’ve been standing in this doorway longer than I thought, my sister’s voice had sounded at least a few rooms away when she called out.

Backing away from me Melissa gives me her largest smile, “Please let me come with you Big Brother. I really want to check out that store with you.” That pouting face is hard to say no to, but I know it’s necessary.

I try to put as much remorse as I can into my voice as I respond, “Sorry squirt. I’m hanging out with some friends today.”

“But- ”

“Sorry sis, I gave my solemn promise that it would just be them and me.” Oh dear, not those. She’s giving me the puppy dog eyes. I have to be strong, “But I promise that we’ll go out another time, alright?” Okay, mostly strong; I don’t think anyone can look at a face like that and not give in at least a little.

An expression of joy appears on her lips and I feel a well of happiness growing inside of me. I love being the nice big brother. It feels so much more rewarding than being mean to them. Seriously, why are there so many siblings who want to keep their brothers or sisters away from them?

She reaches and grasps me in a hug, “Okay! I Love you, big brother!”

“Love you too little sis.” Reaching out I move my hand quickly through her hair. I always do this when she hugs me. It’s a ritual between the two of us and like always, she giggles in response before she realizes what I had called her.

A slight amount of anger enters her voice as she replies to my statement, “Hey I’m not little! I’m your younger sister.” She’s always had an issue with being called little, ever since she was old enough to understand what it meant. I know I shouldn’t use it because she doesn’t like, but I always think of it more as a term of endearment than anything else. I simply can’t stop myself from using it anymore.

A smile grows on my lips and a slightly silly tone enters my voice, “Of course you are sis.”

A playful lilt enters her tone, “Hey! I am so not little! I’m almost three quarters of your height now!” I can tell that she’s only playing now. I have some time left before I need to meet up with my friends, I should play along.

“But you’re still smaller than me right?”

“Yes?” The curiosity in Melissa’s tone is obvious, as is the expression on her face. She’s likely wondering why I would ask such an obvious question.

That playful lilt reappears in my voice, “Well than you must be my little sister right?”

She scowls playfully and responds with the same playful lilt in her voice, “You’re the worst big brother ever. See ya at dinner, alright?”

I can feel the smile that alights my lips, I’m having far too much fun with this than I should be. My reply is as full of my joy as my expression, “Of course I will sis, see you later.” Building up speed I run through the entranceway and towards the skateboard I know awaits outside.

On my way out the door I hear my sister call out to me with a serious tone, “And remember what you promised me!”

I pause for a second in my run to call out to reassure her of my commitment, “Of course I’ll remember. I’m your big brother after all, aren’t I?” That smile on my face may become permanent at this rate. I simply can’t get rid of it.

Leaping onto my skateboard, I contemplate my plans as I race towards my destination, Little Tokyo. About a week ago my friends and I promised to get together today and check out this new shop that’s opening today called The Colorful Toy. It is supposed to be gigantic, the largest store for anime and cartoon paraphernalia on the West Coast!

Today is going to be so much fun!

Standing in front of the Colorful Toy, I realize that it is a lot smaller than I’d imagined it to be. I’d been thinking that it would tower over every building that surrounded it, but instead it is simply around the same height. If this is really the largest building for anime and cartoon paraphernalia on the West Coast, there must not be many of them around. Well at least it fits in better with the surrounding buildings this way.

Still, the colors of the shop certainly match its name. The only time I’d ever seen this many colors in one place before was the time my sister dragged me to a gay pride parade. I don’t think I’ve ever been so embarrassed in my life. I can’t stop myself from shaking as I remember the horror of that moment, there were far too many people wearing butter oil around.

Looking at the building again calms my nerves, it may look like a gay pride parade, but that doesn’t mean that I’m not excited to look inside. If it’s anything like what is displayed in the window, I should have quite a bit of fun looking around.

A familiar exuberant voice calls out to me, “Hey Normad! Good to see ya!” My attention is drawn in the direction of the caller, my ridiculously tall friend Mel. Honestly, he is far too tall for his own good.

“Good to see ya Mel!” I call out with just as much exuberance, “You still looking for those rainbows?”

His features screw up into a glare and a slight amount of anger enters his tone, “Ha, Ha, ha. Very funny. You know I can’t stand those.” His eyes though show a different story, he’s actually fairly amused by it. It’s something of inside joke between Mel and me, but Mel really does have a rather strong aversion to rainbows. My sister once tried to drag Mel to a gay pride parade, but getting within a mile radius of the thing made him run away in fear.

I take a quick look around at my surroundings, expecting to see someone else nearby, but don’t spot hide or hair of him, “Hey wasn’t Jack supposed to come with you?”

Mel’s seems almost hesitant to reply, as if he doesn’t want to let something be known. Still, he answers my question, “Yeah, but he called me a little while before I left and told me he would meet us both here. Apparently he got a ride or something. He didn’t really go into much detail.” His eyes move to look down at his lower left, something he always seems to do whenever he is lying. Well Mel certainly lost all of his honor points with me for the day.

I am, however, wondering what is up with my rather strange friend Jack. He usually isn’t one to simply call a person on the phone and tell them he’s got a ride, he’s far too lazy for that. That didn’t leave too many choi-

Something grasps me around the middle and a gruff voice mutters something I can’t quite make out, but I do recognize the tone. I suppose that Jack had decided to do one of his infamous ‘Random Encounter’ moments in which he hides somewhere and pops out to scare you. He’s done it to me many times before, but I suppose he didn’t have much time to plan this one.

Hmm… I suppose I should play along with this myself.

When I reply it is with the most deadly serious tone I can muster on such short notice, “I’m sorry would you mind repeating that, I couldn’t quite hear ya.”

I can hear Jack muttering quietly to himself, probably thinking about how he could get this joke back on track, before his gruff voice quietly come into my ear, “Hey Norm, how’s it going?”

“Oh very good Jack, NOW WOULD YOU MIND NOT HUGGING ME!?” I feel Jack’s hands slip off me and hear as his feet touch the ground behind me. I have the hardest time keeping myself from laughing. There is nothing more satisfying than knowing you have pranked one of your best friends on their own pranks.

Mel on the other hand doesn’t seem to have the same compunction against laughing in this situation that I do, he’s lying on the floor almost screaming in laughter. Luckily for us, the streets are mostly empty. It is only eight in the morning after all.

“Ok, fine you got me. That makes the score one for Normad and sixty-eight for me. I think I’m still winning.” I scowl at the thought that I am so far behind on my prank count, I’ll have to do something about that, “Make that sixty-nine.” Dammit, he tricked me.

I know I should be angry about this, but I can’t stop the smile that’s tugging at my lips. These two could annoy me so freaking often, but I wouldn’t trade them for the world.

The smile on lips apparently comes with a tone because my voice came out sounding rather upbeat, “So you guys ready to check out this place? It looks pretty neat.”

My smile and tone seems to be infectious because even Jack is smiling, “Yeah, I’m still game. It might not be as cool as it was supposed to be, but not bad.”

Mel’s tone sounds as upbeat as my own, “Count me in.”

“Cool.”

Inside the shop I came to an important realization, bright colors are even better when they completely surround you. If the outside is a gay pride parade, the inside is the after party. Every spot that isn’t needed for walking is littered with paraphernalia and the aisles seem to go on for miles. I suppose that the gigantic portion of the ad is about how deep the building is rather than how tall.

Still, even though it had exceeded my expectations, it still left one question in desperate need of answering, “What should we check out first?”

The answering reply came immediately in Jack’s gruff tone, “How about we go check out the cartoon and anime aisles?”

“Sounds like a plan to me.” I’m as interested in anime as the next hot-blooded American male; that is to say, the next hot-blooded and nerdy American male. Still, I enjoy it and that’s all that matters. Society is not going to bend me to its will. Besides, my sister’s birthday is coming up and I promised to get her something from her favorite anime and this seems like the perfect shop to purchase it from.

“Sounds great!” The excitement in Mel’s voice can most likely be attributed to his being something of an avid T.V. watcher. He doesn’t watch many cartoons, or anime for that matter, but those he did follow, he follows with a passion. “I wonder if they have any of those dolls I like.” I have a feeling he’s referring to that show about the bears with the creepy stare. The few times that he had been able to get me to join him in watching those shows, I had left shivering. They are actually fairly scary to see, but I’m positive he’ll walk out of here carrying one of those dolls with a crazy look on his face.

A rather important thought burst into my head, interrupting those already in progress, “Does anyone know where this aisle is?” I receive a simple shaking head from Jack and something closer to a shaking bobble head from Mel. I suppose it is up to me to find out where it is then.

Taking a look around I easily spot several signs marked anime and cartoon, they easily encompass half the store itself. This is actually going to be rather difficult, there are so many aisles, which should we check first. It doesn’t really matter, they should all be fun to look at.

Pointing towards the location, and receiving nods in return, we quickly make our way towards the aisle. I have difficulty keeping my head locked on any one spot. There are simply too many things to look at in here.

Something pink appears in the corner of my vision. I don’t know why this particular object draws my attention, but it does so like a moth to a flame. There is something special about it, something that made it simply a perfect present for my sister. Now if only I could remember why that is…

Oh, now I remember. This doll is from my sister’s favorite anime, Galaxy Angels. She’d told me that it was her favorite character because it shared the same name as me. I honestly can’t believe that I almost forgot that fact, I’d felt very touched when she had told me. I doubt that many siblings have a good enough relationship where a character becomes a favorite simply because they share named. Thus, this is the perfect gift because it will show the strong bond between my sister and me. I don’t know if she’ll notice, but I’ll know, so it makes the perfect gift.

“… That alright dude?” The sound of Mel’s voice ringing through my ears brings me face to face with his expectant expression. I must have missed whatever he had said while I was lost in thought.

Shaking my head to clear the last vestiges of my thoughts, I reply to the unheard statement, trying to keep the excitement I felt out of my voice, “Sorry, what did you say?”

Mel gives me a look, his voice fairly neutral, it was how he usually reacted when asked to repeat a question, “I said that Jack and I are going to go down this aisle, that alright with you?” His face reverts back to its expectant look.

I nod my head and give a measured response, still trying to keep the excitement from my voice, “Sounds good, dude. I’ll meet up with you guys in a sec. I think I just found the perfect gift for my sister.”

Mel’s eyes shine with curiosity, as does his tone, “Oh, what did you find?”

I point a finger at the doll, being careful to point exactly towards it, the dolls that surround it aren’t exactly ones that I would give to my sister, “That doll over in the corner, the pink one.”

“That big pink blob with cat ears? I would have thought you’d get your sister something nicer looking.” Jack’s gruff voice, combined with sarcastic tones, sometimes makes me want to punch him, mostly when it’s directed at me, but most of the time I find it hilarious. This time though I feel my anger begin to rise slightly and begin to feel an urge to actually go through with it. I quickly let my anger go, there isn’t any reason that he would know that the doll has a special meaning to me. Well, the character really, but that’s not the point.

“The thing with the red Z on its chest?” Somehow the much more happy and exuberant voice of Mel helps me to release any remaining anger that I still had from the past second. This seems to happen a lot actually, Jack somehow makes me angry at him and then Mel somehow calms me down. It is a good thing that they are good friends because one of them would get in trouble if they didn’t have the other to calm down or rile up other people.

I reply, a small bit of a smoldering anger still evident in my tone, but not enough for anyone to hear, “Yeah, that’s it. It’s from her favorite anime, Galaxy Angels. She says it’s her favorite character.”

Mel gives me scratches behind his head, giving me a curious look. His next question comes out with a large amount of curiosity present, “Oh? Why’s that?”

I can’t hide the happiness in my tone when I reply, “Because it shares its name with me.”

The sarcastic jab that comes out Jack’s mouth again makes me feel like punching him, “Oh, that’s so cute.” I ignore it this time. I know for a fact that he would feel the same way if his siblings told him that. In fact, I’m almost positive that he owns a doll of Jack from Jack and Beanstalk because his sister told him it was her favorite story when she was younger.

Even so, I can feel my face heating up with my embarrassment. My reply contains a hint of anger and a roll of the eyes, “Oh, shut up. I’m going to go grab it real quick. There aren’t many left.”

“Okay buddy, we’ll be waiting at the other end of this aisle here.” Jack gruff voice replies while pointing down one of aisles. I believe he chose that aisle at random because it is clearly marked as ‘Little Girls Aisle’.

“What? We will?!” The surprise in Mel’s voice as Jack latches onto him agrees with my earlier assessment that Jack chose the aisle at random. I doubt that Mel wants to go into such an aisle.

“Yeah, we will.” Jack roughly replies and begins making his way down the aisle, pulling a struggling Mel behind him by his collar.

I give a little shrug at the sight. I don’t know why Mel bothers to struggle, he’s never been able to get out of Jack’s grip before and it isn’t likely that he’ll be able to now. Maybe he enjoys trying at times.

Getting back to my task, and ignoring the fading sounds of Mel’s struggles, I walk over to the shelf on which a single doll sits staring at me with long, oval shaped eyes. The fact that only one doll remains is rather surprises me, I had been sure that there had been several there when I last looked. I suppose that, at a distance, the dolls to the left and right of it hid the fact that there is only one left. While I find it slightly odd that the shop is already almost out of a doll so soon after opening, the fact that many of the shelves surrounding me are also empty of their product makes me believe that this is merely due to lack of time to fill them rather than being sold out.

Bending down, I pick up the doll and turn it over a few times, inspecting it for any form of stains or damage. I have been to far too many stores over the years in which the management would place damaged goods on the shelf due to either negligence or lack of caring. Luckily for me it appears that this doll is in very good condition, if the doll had any damage I would not purchase it. I will not give my sister a substandard gift.

Still, even with the positive outcome of the first inspection, I feel that it is necessary to perform a second inspection. I have a good eye for detail, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t occasionally miss small details on the first pass.

I move my eye over the doll for the second time, tracing the seams that line the doll, trying to see if there are any missing stiches or other problems. While I don’t find any missing stiches, which is rather amazing as I’ve never seen a stuffed toy like this without at least one, I do find something rather intriguing that I cannot believe I missed on the first pass, a small button located in one of the ears with a marking that tells me to push it.

I suppose this doll must be able to talk, I can’t think of any other reason for such a thing. Honestly, this makes the doll an even better purchase for my sister. She loves to hear quotes from her favorite shows.

As I’m about to stand up and purchase it, a thought comes to me. What if the doll doesn’t work correctly, I’d rather not present my sister with a gift that fails to work or requires triple A batteries that we rarely seem to have in the house. So testing the doll seems like an intelligent idea. The worst that can happen is the doll not doing anything and me having to ask if the doll requires batteries or something.

So, reaching out a finger I press the button in its ear, expecting to hear one of his lines, most likely something about a ten gigabyte CPU.

A voice with a strangely weak voice with an odd lilt to it reverberates in my ears, although it almost feels like it has bypassed my ears in their entirety, which can’t be possible, ‘So someone has taken hold of my trap. I suppose this is fortuitous for me. I have another chance to escape my prison cell.’ I’m fairly sure that I’ve never heard that line in any show in my life, let alone from the Galaxy Angel episodes I’d seen my sister watch. Perhaps this is a defective model?

The voice comes back again, sounding much stronger, perhaps the speaker is broken and a wire had moved a bit to create a better circuit, but still the odd lilt remains, ‘Oh, don’t worry, I’m the perfect model. I’ll just be taking your body for my own. It’s for the greater good, after all. Heh, heh, heh.’ I suppose this doll really must be defective, I can’t give this doll to my sister. Perhaps, they have a non-defective one in the backroom or I can find something else to give her instead.

Agreeing with my own internal plan, I begin the process of putting the doll back onto the shelf, but find that my arm is ignoring all commands to release the doll. What is going on? Why can’t I move my arm? I try to move my leg, but find that it is also ignoring all the commands that I give.

What is going on here? Why can’t I move- GAH!

A twisting sensation from my neck and a burning sensation from my head flood my brain. I can’t concentrate on anything around me… My vision begins to blur… My sight fades to black, yet the pain continues to build higher and higher, going far beyond anything that I have felt before.

Suddenly, the pain stops and I relish the feeling of nothing that flood my body. I have no idea what is going, but I’m glad that it’s over. Still, something feels off… like I’m not quite where I was a minute ago. I should probably go to see my doctor sometime soon, this is not a normal occurance.

The darkness that is infesting my vision begins to clear and I start to see blurs that soon define themselves into shapes. However, the more that comes into focus, the more off things feel. The shelves appear to be far taller than they had been when my vision first went black, perhaps I have fallen on my backside and am looking up from the floor?

As my vision finishes clearing up, I try to give a started gasp, but nothing comes out. Considering what I’m seeing at the moment, I can’t help worrying that I’ve something far worse than a simple sickness has overcome me. For standing right in front of me is my own red haired body, looking quite a bit taller from the angle at which I likely lay.

So… if my body is standing in front of me, than I must not be in it. So, what am I right now? Spotting a mirror behind my body, I glance towards it, only to see the stuffed body of Normad that I’d been holding in my hands earlier. There is no way this could be real, I must be in a coma right now. Dolls can’t hold human minds after all… right? Right? I can’t possibly be trapped in here…

The same voice that had come from the doll rings out, far stronger than it had sounded earlier breaking me from my morbid thoughts, “Heh, heh, heh. Freedom! After a thousand years trapped in that toy of a body, I, the Great and Powerful Wizard Mordici, am finally free. Free to help the orphans!” Beginning to blink, I realize that I am unable to do so; stuffed animals tend not to have eye lids. All I can do at the moment is continue to listen as the thing in my body continues its rant, “After I make them orphans of course, can’t bloody help the orphans if there aren’t any orphans to help. Heh, heh, heh.”

I try to speak, at the very least to counteract the stupidity that I found in that statement, but find that I am also unable to do that, lack of lungs doesn’t seem to help. In some ways I still believe this to all be a dream brought on by some disease, people can’t end up in dolls, but I could still feel my anger growing at this thief.

Some of that anger seems to escape from me in the sound of a voice, although not my own. Instead the voice that escapes my stuffed body sounds far more robotic, ‘Hey, give me back my body you thief!’

The creature’s attention is drawn back towards me, likely he forgot about me the moment he took my body, “Oh? You’re still awake? My, I thought that was something special to me. Well no matter, I suppose. Heh, heh, heh.” He puts a finger to his lips, smiles, and spoke in a voice full of malice, “Still, if you ever tell anyone what happened, you might destroy all my plans to help the orphans. Heh, heh, heh. Well, I just suppose that I’ll have to get rid of you.”

He raises my body’s arm and begins to mutter to himself quietly, I can’t make out any of the words he is saying, but I begin to struggle as hard as I can, which does little as I have no muscles with which to move.

After a few seconds of his muttering speech begins to tingle and a tingling sensation spreads throughout my stuffed body. This, while a nice change of pace from feeling pain or nothing at all, simply worries me more than when I felt nothing at all.

‘What are you doing?’ My voice sounds small and weak, like it is coming from someone very far away from me. I can’t help wondering why that is, even as the creature continues its movements and muttering.

The creatures voice finishes its muttering before answering me in a nonchalant tone, as if this is simply something it does every day, “Oh, just sending you somewhere that you won’t be able to trap me ever again. I’m sure you’ll like it. It’s just filled with colorful things like yourself, a very special universe.” He gives one final wave of my hand and the tingling in my body begins to fade.

A question grows on my lips, but before I can ask it the world begins to go rather loopy and my body begins to feel stretched in multiple directions at once. The world begins to waver, seemingly struggling to stay in existence, but it soon fails. I feel a popping sound flow through my body, hear the color black, and watch as the world tastes like copper.

The world begins to waver back into existence, the colors being seen by my eyes, rather than heard by ears, and sound begins to flow back towards my ears, away from my sense of touch.

I can’t recommend that method of travel to anyone, having all your senses mixed up before screwing them back together is a very unpleasant sensation. I’m fairly sure that if I still had a stomach right now, I would be heaving my guts out… Oh G-d. I don’t have a stomach or muscles… or any of the necessary things that are required to say that one is alive. What am I going to do with the rest of my life? Am I doomed to be trapped on this shelf for the rest of my life? Am I even still technically alive? Does having the ability to think you’re alive mean you’re alive or does it mean that you’re crazy? Will I ever see my family or friends again!?

…

Okay, that’s enough freaking out. Freaking out has never helped me before and it isn’t likely to start being a productive mode of thinking now. So why should I bother to continue doing it? It’s better if I spend my time productively. I’m sure if I give this problem a little thought I’ll be able to create a solution. Now what can I still do?

…

Yeah, I can do a whole lot of nothing. I have no muscles I can move, no mouth to talk with, at least not under my control at the moment… yeah, I got nothing at the moment.

I glance around me, although I seemingly have no eyeballs I can still move my vision around a rather limited area. The shelves appear to look the same as they did before the wizard did whatever it was he did, still full of toys with many an empty rack. Ha! Maybe that wizard is a phony and couldn’t actually send me anywhere. If I was really lucky, then my friends will notice something is wrong with me and knock him a good one. Jack should be perfect for that job.

Pausing for a second I imagine that scenario.

…

Yeah, I’m doomed. They’re my best friends and I don’t like being rude to them, but they aren’t very perceptive. It took Mel almost two weeks to notice that I had placed a kick-me sign on his back. They probably won’t notice anything is wrong until at least a week passes. Still, I can always hope. At this point, hope is all I really have.

I need to look on the bright side. At least I’m a cool looking doll. I could have ended up like one of those dolls across from me. They’re so very grey and dull-looking and could they have thought of a duller name for it? Smarty Pants? Really? I’m at least a bright pink that draws the eye and has a name that doesn’t sound like an insult. Everyone will want to play with me!

Why did a thought like that pop into my head? Why would I want to be played with? I can’t think of a single good reason for it. Well, at least it’s a positive thought. I hear those help you live longer and, right now, I at least want to know that I’m still alive.

Still, I’m getting a little bored, but I’m sure that something interesting will happen soon to help me pass the time…

I was wrong, very wrong. Nothing interesting at all seems to happen in the anime aisle of this store. In the entire three hours that I’ve been sitting here, I have not seen a single person, or being for that matter. The only thing to look at are those Smarty Pants dolls and they don’t get any more interesting no matter how long you look at them. Honestly, I’m starting to get bored.

“Okay, honey. Pick the one you want.” A measured voice calls out from somewhere nearby. Huh? Is someone finally coming down this aisle? Considering how boring it is right now, any kind of excitement would be lovely.

“Really, Mom? I can pick out any doll that I want?” A much younger, but far more excited voice calls out soon after the first one.

The first voice comes back again, continuing its controlled tone, “Yes, Twilight, any doll you want. It is your birthday after all.”

The second voice sounds even more excited when she replies, “YAH!”

Shortly after I heard the sound of something going clip-clop on the ground, which is a rather strange sound to hear from what I must assume is a child as the only thing I can think that would make that sound is high heeled shoes. Most parents I know are less than willing to allow their children to wear such things as they might trip and fall. Maybe this child has strange parents?

The clip-clopping sound draws closer and it flows slowly into my vision. I miss being able to blink, perhaps than I could remove this hallucination from my sight. A creature about the size and shape of a small horse, but the color of the cartoon depiction of grapes, purple, stood in front of me. The oddest bit, however, is the horn on top of its head. There is no way that this creature is real. Perhaps my earlier assumption that I am in a coma somewhere is correct. There is absolutely no freaking way that I am seeing what I think I’m seeing. There is no talking purple horse with a horn sitting in front of me. Those things only exist in legend, so there is no way that one is here now.

Perhaps imagining myself blinking will cause this creature to disappear from my sight and bring back reality. Concentrating the entirety of my mind on the concept of blinking I set to work. Hnnn… Nope that doesn’t work. The creature is still there.

Well I suppose for the moment I’ll accept that the wizard did send me somewhere else, I’m pretty sure that horses with horns don’t exist in my word, but I’ll keep looking for clues that I’m on my world. It’s always possible I was sent to somewhere that no one has ever heard of rather than a whole new world.

I’m not going to be making any bets or holding my breath for that one.

“Now, which one should I pick?” The horse’s soft, childlike tone brought me back to the present. If there were any doubts in my mind that this had been the creature speaking earlier, they are completely gone now. I watch as her, I could only assume it was her, eyes travel over the many dolls in this aisle, “There are so many choices. How do I pick only one?”

Once again, I miss blinking. That gives me an idea. I’m growing rather bored of sitting on this shelf for so long. Having an owner might allow me to see more of this possibly new world, or place, in which horses appear to be the dominant species, or at the very least give me something new to look at.

So what’s the best way to be the one she picks… Oh, I know!

Getting my voice out of my stuffed mouth is far easier this time than it had been earlier, but the robotic tone to my voice remains, ‘Hey! Pick me! Don’t I look cool?’ I’m sure that when she hears me speaking, especially because they aren’t preprogrammed lines, she’ll pick me. I mean who wouldn’t want a magic doll of their own.

I wait a couple of seconds, expecting her to turn around and excitedly smile and pick me up… but nothing happens. She just continues to look at those ugly smarty pants dolls across from me. I can feel myself growing nervous, I don’t want to be sitting her for any longer than I have to. Well it’s okay. It’s only a minor setback. I’m sure I just wasn’t loud enough. Maybe if I was a little louder.

I push more power into my voice, I’m not quite sure how, and scream, ‘HEY! PICK ME! I’M SO MUCH COOLER AND MORE FUN TO PLAY WITH THAN THOSE OTHER DOLLS!’ I can hear my voice reverberating throughout the store, the acoustics in this place are amazing.

And still she ignores me, and apparently so does everyone else in the store. Can’t anyone hear me? That wizard could, why can’t anyone? Maybe it had to do with the fact that he was a wizard? Or the fact that he had been in physical contact with me? I really don’t have enough information to be making any kind of logical deductions here. All I can say for sure is that it seems these people, horses, can’t hear me, which is going to make my life all the more difficult.

Still, it can’t hurt to try again, can it?

My robotic sounding tone comes out with a rather obvious begging component, ‘Please Twilight, I’m begging you. Pick me!’ I’m hoping that Twilight is her name and not a nickname her parents or friends gave her. I’ve heard that names have magic, in a number of stories anyway and considering that I’m a doll because of magic I figure it’s worth a shot. With any luck, she’ll hear her name and respond to that, if nothing else.

Twilight head rises slightly, in curiosity or interest I don’t know, and she looks behind her towards me, “Hm? What was that?” Excitement rose within my stuffed heart, I can’t believe that actually worked. “I could have sworn I heard somepony.” She blinks her eyes and turns her head this way and that before shrugging, “Hmm, must have been my imagination.”

I watch as she turns back towards the Smarty Pants dolls, completely destroying any chance of getting out of here. Is she really going to pick one of those over me? Maybe those dolls have something that appeals greatly to horses, but not humans? Or humans trapped in dolls, whatever the case might be.

Wait… What’s she doing? Is she shaking slightly? And now she’s turning towards me… Wait! She’s turning towards me! Yes!

She walks… trots? Closer to me and moves her head closer to my own. Her voice rings out in glee, “This doll is perfect! It’s so cute!” While I wish that she would call me cool rather than cute I can deal with it as long as it gets me out of here.

An odd sensation begins to draw me from my thoughts and the sight of a strange purple aura surrounding me draws me the rest of the way out of them. This is amazing! How is something like this holding me up? Can this possibly be magic? Can these unicorns actually cast magic!? This can be even better than I thought! I might be able to get some help… if this is actually magic… and if I can get them to hear me. That is far too many ifs, but it’s another hope I can add to my list. Considering how short that list is adding another item almost doubles it.

Still, I’m not going to give it too much mental consideration. Considering how hard it was to getting Twilight’s attention, it will be difficult to get them to hear my plight. Still, I’ll have plenty of time to try.

“Mom, Mom!” Twilight’s excited voice knocks me out of my negative thoughts and presents me with the sight of a second a horned horse, this time white in coloration. I suppose this is Twilight’s mother.

“Yes dear?”

“I want this doll!” I have to ask one question about this situation, why is Twilight presenting me to her mother upside down?

“Are you sure you don’t want the Smarty Pants doll?” The white horse’s voice sounds rather incredulous and I have to wonder why. Is there something so wrong with me that I deserve to be replaced by an ugly Smarty Pants doll? Is there something so wrong with me that a drab, grey doll like one of those would make a better present? I can only hope that Twilight decides she likes me better, I don’t want to stay here any longer than I have to.

“I’m sure Mommy. I want this one!” Relief floods through me at the sound of Twilight’s happy voice. That could have been a large problem on my part, especially since I can’t do anything to stop it.

Twilight’s mother’s voice comes out slowly and sounds almost forced, “Well, if you’re sure, dear. Let me just check the price.” I never before realized how humiliating it is to have something check out your ass while you face the ground, especially when it isn’t even your own species, “Well it’s within our price range. It’s pretty cheap, actually.”

Hey, who are they calling cheap? Although I suppose if it makes it any more likely that I won’t be sitting in this shop for too long, I’ll take it.

I’m lucky that I’m currently being held by Twilight’s mother rather than the horse herself. I don’t feel like being carried around by a ragdoll as Twilight bounces around in a circle screaming the word “yes” over and over again. How old is she, anyway? I’d never been trained in the art of reading a pony’s age.

“Dear, we’re in a store. You can do that later alright?” The white unicorn’s tone is full of mirth as she speaks to her young daughter.

The young, filly I think is actually the appropriate word in this case, stops in her dance at the sound of her mother’s voice. She looks almost embarrassed, if I’m reading the red blush through her fur correctly. Honestly, I’m not sure how I can read through her fur like that anyway, it should be far too thick for me to see through.

I remain floating in the white aura of Twilight’s Mother as they trot up to the front counter and are greeted enthusiastically by the cashier, “Did you find everything you wanted today?”

“Yes, thank you.” The mother replies.

Twilight grasps onto her mother’s leg, giving her a pleading look. I can hear the begging in her voice as she asks, “Mommy, can I hold the doll?”

The white Unicorn looks down at Twilight, smiles, and with an exasperated sigh replies, “As soon as mommy has finished paying for it.”

“Okay!” The smile that grows on Twilight’s face reminds me of nothing more than the look my sister gets whenever she receives a gift. I’m hoping I get one like it when I give my sister her birthday present.

As I contemplate the smile, I feel myself being lifted up into the air, still upside down, being checked out by another strange horse. Now that I can actually see her, I realize that there is something rather odd about her in comparison to the other two. I can’t quite place my finger on it, not that I could have right now anyway, no muscles and all, but there is something there.

Ah, now I see! She doesn’t have a horn. I don’t really know what it signifies, status maybe? Or perhaps it is like the way humans are differently colored and this is simply how horses differenciate it? Something for me to think about in any case.

The enthusiastic tone of the cashier calls me back to the real world, or as close as it is likely to get anyway, “That will be ten bits miss.”

“Of course.” Handing over the bits, Twilight’s mother looks at Twilight and nods her head and I again find myself floating in midair courtesy of the Twilight Express.

Yeah this was not how I expected my day to go.

Author's Note: Well here it is, my attempt at a Human in Equestria story with a twist. This story is a bit of an experiment for me, so you might see changes in writing style throughout the story. Hope you all enjoy it and remember, feedback is food for an author. So please don't let me starve.

Also I want to thank my prereaders and editor for helping me with this story.

There will be no Human x Pony in this story, I will not touch that one. I don't know why, but it feels like this is important to note.

Final note: There will be a least one more character added to the character list when he shows up.