How to Recover your Marefriend

by Smashology

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Starlight Glimmer, Sunburst, Random, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Main 6, Romance
Length: 2353

Sunburst has messed up everything between him and Starlight. Now he has to amend the situation, but what is the correct form of doing it when she has an unstable personality and the powers of a goddess?

My contribution for Month of Lurve.

Sunburst has messed up everything between him and Starlight. Now he has to amend the situation, but what is the correct form of doing it when she has an unstable personality and the powers of a goddess?

Cover art by Osipush.

Thanks to MrDerpface for the editing! You're the real hero here!

Featured on the popular stories list! (2/24/17)

Published 2017-02-24 20:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-02-24 20:40:01 UTC

So that means we're getting married?

The Crystal Empire. Sunburst got in a bar, just to take a drink. Oh, and talk to Starlight Glimmer about their recent breakup... What? Didn’t you know? Both Starlight and Sunburst ended their relationship. And he didn’t know why or how it happened, but he needed to amend things. For his plan to work, he requested Starlight to be in this specific bar at 8:00 pm.

“Waiter!” he shouted, calling the attention of the bartender. After a sigh, and a toss of the cup he was cleaning, he came to the site where Sunburst was waiting.

“Give me something that matches my personality,” said Sunburst, overly confident.

“Sorry, we don’t have ginger ale here,” responded the waiter, retiring at that moment.

He slammed his head frustrated on the counter and yelled in silence. He didn’t notice some ponies arriving to the counter.

“Glad you could make it.”

As a look passed between the group, to whom he still didn’t know about, one of the members tipped Sunburst’s head upwards and turned it to his right. He noticed three ponies on one side: Princess Twilight Sparkle, Rarity and Pinkie Pie. And on the other: Rainbow Dash, Applejack and Fluttershy.

“Oh. What are you doing here girls?” Sunburst asked, a little confused.

“We knew about your problem and we came as fast as we could to assist you,” answered Twilight. “Right, girls?” All the girls nodded at the same time.

“And... what am I supposed to do?” Sunburst didn’t make suspicions about this last movement.

“Make her forgive you,” said Twilight directly. “I mean, you don’t have anything to regret. You are the official crystaller, you have work to do. It’s not your fault, you have to take care of Flurry Heart when Shining Armor and Cadance aren’t around, and you have to teach my niece how to use her magic. So, there’s nothing wrong in being absent for one date.”

After analyzing her answer, Sunburst agreed. “You’re right, I have work to do and nothing can’t stop me from it.”

But then, another problem appeared in his mind. “But... if she doesn’t believe me? You have seen her, she can be a little assertive sometimes.”

“No problem, darling. I have something that never fails,” said Rarity. “Did you bring them?”

“Yes.”

Rarity whispered to his ear. “...Show them to me.”

Sunburst obeyed Rarity’s petition and pulled out of his robe a flower bouquet and a box wrapped up as a gift.

”Oh, yes, yes, yes,” Rarity rub her hooves, her eyes glowed a little when she saw them.

“I don’t know exactly why you want these...” said Sunburst.

“It’s really easy, darling. If she doesn’t listen to you, give them to her and she will forgive you. My little Spikey-wikey always brings me one of them, or both in the best cases, and every discussion we had is forgotten instantly.”

“Oooooooooooooor,” Pinkie Pie interrupted Rarity. “You can give her one of those I told you to bring,” Pinkie Pie looked to every side to make sure nopony could listened to her. “Did you bring them?”

“Yes.”

Pinkie Pie mimicked Rarity’s previous actions. “...Show them to me.”

Sunburst pulled out of his robe a pack of medicines, it looked like anti-depressives or pills for controlling the body hormones.

“That’s perfect...” Pinkie Pie maliciously grinned.

“Why those?” asked Twilight suspicious about it.

“Well, Maud and Limestone say it helps me from feeling down...” Afterwhich the shock upon hearing the explanation made an uncomfortable silence fill the bar.

“I don’t get it,” said Sunburst, breaking the silence.

“Don’t you see?” asked Pinkie Pie. “Maybe she’s mad with you because of her mind problems. If you can control them, then everything is over.”

“Mind problem?” Sunburst asked, doubtful of that petition. He carefully pulled back the bouquet, the chocolate box and the pills in his robe.

“Ignore the rest of the girls,” now it was Rainbow Dash’s turn. “Just tell her to calm down.”

Sunburst didn’t know how to react to that answer. It was not only abrubt, rude and inconsiderate to even try, but would that even work? Regardless, he was speechless. “H-H-H-How’s that supposed to help me?”

“I don’t know,” she answered coldly. “Look, I suggested to go to a motel, so things could be easier to let out.”

“He couldn’t Rainbow Dash!” Rarity interrupted her. “Everypony knows you can only go to a motel after the first date!”

“This is not my first date!” yelled Sunburst. “It’s just a chat with her!”

“Just to amend fences. Nothing more,” Rarity corrected him. “Don’t worry, it’s almost the same.”

“Besides, if this was our first date, I would’ve made reservations in an elegant restaurant, not a low budget bar.”

“Be realistic sugarcube, ya’re not rich,” added Applejack, Sunburst turned around to her. “Ya couldn’t afford it, ya can’t even take care of yerself properly.”

Sunburst raised one eyebrow, this wasn’t the assistance he wanted or needed in this moment. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Ya want to be with her, am Ah right?” asked Applejack smoothly. Sunburst nodded and she smiled briefly and raised one eyebrow. “Just be honest with her, tell her the truth, and tell her how ya feel.”

“Yes,” added Fluttershy. “Tell her you love her!”

The rest of the Mane 6 gasped horrified and her pupils shrank. “NO!”

The bar fell into silence, awkward and uncomfortable silence… again.

“Why not?” asked Fluttershy stunned.

“You can’t do that!” exclaimed Rarity. “He could risk his relationship with Starlight...! Or even their friendship!”

“Or she could sue him and never want to see him again!” added Twilight.

“Or she could kill him!” continued Rainbow Dash. Drastic as it may have sounded, almost all the ponies gathered rubbed their necks in discomfort.

“So, Applejack can tell him to be completely honest with Starlight and tell her about his feeling towards her, despite the fact that she hasn’t been in a relationship in his whole life–?” Fluttershy surprisingly argued.

“Hey!” Countered Applejack.

“But I, who has have a healthy relationship with Discord for years, can’t tell him to tell her ‘I love you’?”

“‘Cause...” Applejack answered. “Why would a pony want to play like that? Why would anypony put a relationship that took years to develop on the line?”

“Well...” Fluttershy answered back, directly and without the slightest doubt. “It’s honestly thrilling. Let me explain: when every move counts, when each moment matters, when each decision you take is important, everything reaches a level of engagement that is hard to find anywhere else in the world. It makes punishes mistakes hard, but that makes success all the more rewarding.”

After a moment of thought, between discussions and rants, Sunburst finally spoke. “I’ll take into account. Thanks Fluttershy... thanks to all of you girls, for coming here just to support me.”

“Oh, silly,” said Pinkie Pie sarcastically happy. “We’re not here!”

Sunburst, once again, was speechless. But only he, the rest of the Mane 6 took the notice so well. “Wait... what?”

“We don’t even exist. We’re just a clever visual metaphor to personify the abstract concept of thought.”

“It was great to assist you Sunburst,” said Rainbow Dash. “Even if it was in your mind.”

“One last thing,” said Applejack, approaching to his ear and whispering. “Please, the next time, don’t smell paint. Girls don’t like guys who look like weed smokers. Trust me sugarcube, Ah promise it will be worth it.”

His pupils expanded and everything made sense: Sunburst came back into reality. He was in front of a wall. It happened that he never got into the bar in the first place, he was expelled by the bodyguards and accidentally landed in front of a wall recently painted. The ingredients had a secondary effect on him and made a hallucination in his mind. The bar was at the other side of the street. But now that things were cleared up, it was time to do the right thing: he went to the main entrance was again and now, by force, he finally got into. In the farthest corner of the bar, she was there, sitting on a tall stool.

“Hey!” he heard her voice, her hoof was pointing to him. “Sunburst!”

He approached, carefully but full of confidence. She looked really mad and her eyes glared at him.

“So, what do you want me for?” she asked coldly. After taking a breath of air, he responded.

“To beg me pardon.”

“To beg you pardon?!” Starlight freaked out. “You were the one who said you were taking care of Flurry Heart when I sent you that letter!”

“I’m the official crystaller, I have to take care of Flurry Heart when her parents aren’t around, and I have to teach Twilight’s niece how to use her magic. I don’t have anything to regret, I can be absent for one date.”

“That’s not what I got from Cadance,” Starlight shot back. “She said you went with those bums you call ‘friends’ to get drunk instead! Yes, she told me everything!”

“But–”

“No buts. You were avoiding me! Why did you did it? Why...?!”

Starlight continued talking, and talking, and talking. He stopped paying attention to her words. Sunburst never got a chance to speak, so to shut her up and noticing Twilight’s advice didn’t work, he proceeded to Rarity’s. He took the bouquet out of his robe and gave her to Starlight. She rejected it.

“You think I’ll come back with you with this nonsensical gift?!”

Then the box came out to play. “You think I am a–!”

And unlike the bouquet, she was delighted, even her eyes sparkled.

“Oooooooooooh, how sweet! What is it?”

“Chocolates.”

But the magic didn’t lasted for long and her frowny face came back.

“Are you an imbecile?! I’m lactose intolerant! This is proof that you never listen to me! It’s like I’m talking to a wall! You listen to buckball commentators more than me!”

It was time for the last item in his robe, but something unexpected happened: Starlight spotted the pack and pulled it out with her magic. She read the inscription out loud.

“Happy pills of happiness, for making you smile and forget stress.”

She threw the pack to the floor and stepped on it until the pills were nothing but dust. Then she leered deeply to Sunburst.

“If you think this ruction is by a hormonal problem of mine, that means you’re a sexist bastard.”

“No! That’s not what I meant!”

Starlight refused to listen to any of his explanations and used her magic to attach all ponies inside the bar to the walls, along with the furniture. And, to prevent Sunburst to run away, she shut the doors and windows. The ponies were unable to do anything but witnessed the fight between the two lovers.

“You’re cute as a friend, let’s leave it that way!” Starlight started, friend zoning him.

“I need an indefinite time!” But it didn’t work. Sunburst was in trouble.

“You left your parchments in my room!”

“And you left your diary open in my house!”

“Trixie never invaded my privacy!”

And then, to follow her game, Sunburst said the worst thing ever imagined. Something that will make him regret every choice taken in his life.

“If you miss her so much, marry her!”

Starlight remained silent. For one or two moments, there was nothing but quietude. Then she spoke... with a deep, demonic voice.

“Congratulations! You’re an asshole!”

The bar transformed into a battlefield, a tornado surrounded Starlight and made every pony and furniture inside levitate and spin. What had been nailed to the wall and or floor was suddenly set adrift in a cataclysmic wind.

After saying what he had said, Sunburst had hopelessly sighed and facehoofed, taking his time and repeating a mantra of idiot over and over again in his head.

Starlight’s eyes began to glow, like she was charging her ultimate attack. Sunburst covered himself from the powerful wind, and in his desperation, he knew there was only one option possible: follow Rainbow Dash’s advice.

“Starlight, keep calm!” he shouted.

“I AM CALM!”

The force of the scream stunned him momentarily, then he proceeded to tell her the truth, like Applejack said.

“Starlight, please, I’m scared. Keep calm!”

“I AM CALM ALREADY, DAMN IT!”

This scream weakened him so much that he was kneeling to prevent the internal pain. He was on the last ones. Panting and unable to move, he had to choose his next movement carefully or otherwise the entire world could end in that precise instant. Lifting his head up and looking at her, he knew what he had to do. He wasn’t ready, but it was the only option.

“Fluttershy, I hope to Celestia your words were true…”

“What I’m trying to say, Starlight is that... I... I love you!”

Suddenly, all the rage and anger disappeared, as if somepony had just tapped their hooves. Starlight came back to normal, her eyes stopped glowing. The furniture and ponies were placed in their correspondent places.

“What did you say?”

She truly sounded more calmed. After confirming that his robe was the same color as when he walked in, Sunburst stood up slowly and carefully, he looked at her into her eyes.

“I said that I love you.”

When Starlight smiled, he continued. “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me and I didn’t realize it until you were apart. Forgive me for being an idiot, I miss you so much.”

“I miss you too, sweetheart.”

“I’m willing to fulfill all the promises I have made to you.”

“So that means we’re getting married?”

Sunburst got paralyzed in that moment, the world was freeze on, his pupils shrank and his mouth was wide opened. Now he truly knew the game was over for him. The last thing he remembered was Starlight smiling happily, he cried in fear and yelled in silence.

Author's Note

Engagement facts:

-What if I told you that most of the dialogues and ideas came from Fire Emblem: Awakening experiences like this?

I'm so lonely.