Oh No, Not Him

by Chancegunnett

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Main 6, Princess Luna, Comedy, Princess Celestia, Random, Discord, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2372

Discord's long lost little brother returns, Celestia finds him amusing, Luna thinks he's hilarious... but Discord, let's just say he's less than stoked to see his brother again, at first.

Discord's long lost little brother returns, Celestia finds him amusing, Luna thinks he's hilarious... but Discord, let's just say he's less than stoked to see his brother again, at first.

Will shenanigan's happen between the two lords of chaos, only time will tell.
(Who am I kidding, we're talking about the lord of chaos and the younger brother that once upon a time idolized him, of course shenanigan's are gonna happen)

In the end, CHAOS WILL REIN SUPREME!

(Potentially a multi-story 'series' if reader's would like that)

Published 2017-03-03 04:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-03-03 04:10:01 UTC

GUESS WHO!

Discord floated lazily in the air above Fluttershy, today he, Elements, Spike, and Starlight Glimmer, had decided to do a little meet up at Ponyville Park. He was uninterested in the goings on around him, he just stared off into the cloud riddled sky. Suddenly a loud pop sounded to his left, lazily looking over Discord was shocked and horrified to see a tall biped standing there giving him a warm smile. Said biped had a nearly hairless physique, he was wearing a white jacket with the top slightly unzipped, a black short sleeved shirt visible beneath. On his lower body he wore a pair of faded blue jeans and a pair of black sneakers. His long hair was frazzled, one side blonde the other brown. His left eye was sapphire blue and his right eye was hazel, his skin pale and fair.

Discord continued to look on in disbelief.

"Anton," questioned Discord, his expression slowly turning annoyed.

"Hi hi Ordy, how's my big brother been," asked Anton cheerfully.

"Oh, great.... you," said Discord before crossing his arms and turning away.

"C'mon Discord, you still salty about the whole 'I can't let you take over the world' thing, look, I'm sorry," said Anton.

"You're my brother... and you turned on me," said Discord tears forming in his eyes.

"I know... but I did it for your own good, I didn't want my big bro getting turned to stone... twice," said Anton sorrowfully.

"Wait a minute... you knew I'd get turned to stone," asked Discord in disbelief.

"Yeppy-yep-yep," said Anton smiling.

"How," asked Discord.

"Mom told me, duh," said Anton his smile never wavering.

"Ignus-bucking-damn-it," said Discord covering his face with a hand.

"HEY, DON'T USE MOM'S NAME IN VAIN," yelled Anton angrily "you'll make her mad."

"Is she listening," asked Discord suddenly becoming paranoid.

"She's always listening," said Anton with a terrified tone and a deathly serious expression.

"Who's Ignus," asked Fluttershy meekly.

Anton turned to Fluttershy and said with a voice as soft as silk "Ignus is an ancient goddess-like entity, she is red, gigantic and has six eyes. On top of that she also had four arms, and two curved horns protruding from her forehead. Mother has a physical form kind of similar to my own."

"And she's your's and Discord's mother," asked Twilight with an inquisitive expression.

"Yep; she's also Faust's younger sister," replied Anton sweetly.

"What's she like," asked Pinkie bouncing around Anton happily.

"She can be VERY intense, I doubt there's a time where she isn't angry," said Anton "except of course when she's talking to me, Discord, or our other two siblings."

"So Discord isn't the member of an ancient species," asked Twilight writing down some notes on a piece of paper.

"Heaven's no, he is a Deus, like myself, Draconequus is just the type of Deus he is. My type of Deus is called 'human' by the way," stated Anton.

Discord worked his way up to Anton's side and placed a hand to one side of his mouth so that only Anton would hear what he said.

"Anton, what the heck is going on, with what I've done in the past, I find it hard to believe that the mane 6 will just automatically count you as a friend," said Discord suspiciously.

"What do you mean by 'what I've done in the past,'" asked Anton curiously.

"You're my brother, don't you think that they'd be a little skeptical of you," clarified Discord.

"Of course not, we're a part of a short potentially one-off story that was written by a teenager in highschool, the plot has to be simple and the event's as short as possible," said Anton as if it were obvious.

"Yeah Discord," whispered Pinkie suddenly joining in on the conversation.

"See, even best pone get's it," said Anton giddily pointing to Pinkie.

"I guess I better officially introduce you all to my little brother here," announced Discord with a sigh.

"That would be nice, yes," said Anton with a jokingly sarcastic tone.

"Everypony, I'd like to introduce to you, one of the biggest pain's in my all-powerful behind, my dearest little brother, Anton," said Discord adding a little emphasis on the word 'dearest.'

"Anton, this is Princess Twilight Sparkle," said Discord motioning towards the lavender alicorn.

Anton crossed his right arm over his chest and bowed slightly "tis a honor to make your acquaintance your majesty."

Twilight blushed heavily and waved both her hooves in front of her frantically in embarrassment "j-just call me Twilight."

"If that is what you wish," said Anton as he rose from his bow.

Discord rolled his eyes "next is Spike, Twilight's assistant and little brother."

Anton gave the little drake a curt nod.

"Next is the one and only, Applejack," continued Discord.

"Howdy there partner," said Applejack tipping her stetson.

"Hello, it's nice to meet you," said Anton giving Applejack a wave.

"Next is my dear Fluttershy," said Discord motioning to the yellow Pegasus who hid behind her mane as a result.

"Hello, now aren't you just the most ADORABLE little thing in the world," said Anton with a warm smile.

Fluttershy smiled and said in a small voice "thank you Anton."

"Back off, she's mine," whispered Discord harshly.

"Don't worry bro, I'm not trying to steal your girl," replied Anton warmly.

"Next is Pinkie Pie," said Discord motioning to the pink pony that was bouncing towards Anton with a smile on her face.

Without warning Anton scooped up Pinkie into a hug, eliciting a small excited squeak from the pink mare. Once she regained her bearings she quickly returned the hug and nuzzled him gently.

"OH I LIKE HIM, he's soft and FIRM, which makes his hugs AWESOME," exclaimed Pinkie.

Anton hesitantly put Pinkie down and turned his attention to the mares standing in front of him.

"Next, of course, is Rarity," said Discord gesturing to the alabaster unicorn.

Giving a slight bow Anton spoke in a lightly posh accent "milady Rarity, what a pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise," replied Rarity smiling sweetly.

"Finally, there's Rainbow Dash," said Discord lazily getting an irritated groan from Rainbow.

Anton raised a hand and offered a simple 'sup' of which she returned.

"HEY, WHAT ABOUT ME," exclaimed Starlight Glimmer in agitation.

"Oh yeah, there's also Starlight over there," said Discord disinterestedly.

"Hey, Communist Pone," said Anton on the verge of laughter.

Starlight blushed and looked away "I wanted equality between all ponies, no matter what race they were, not communism. Though Cutie Marxist used to be a big inspiration of mine."

"That's kinda communism," said Anton thoughtfully.

"Well all, it's a pleasure to meet you all," said Anton.

"If you don't mind me asking, and I'm sure I speak for all of us, could you tell us a little bit about yourself," asked Starlight Glimmer with a small smile.

"Sure, why not; when I was young... well younger, I wanted to be just like my eldest sibling, Discord. I'm the youngest out of the four of us, especially now," said Anton.

"What do you mean by that," asked Rarity.

"When I stood against Discord a little over eight thousand years ago, he sealed me away in a magical fourth dimensional box, completely separated from time and space, so therefore I'm still the same age I was when I was put in there, but all is okay, I'm not mad at my brother," said Anton smiling at the end.

The ponies mouth's made an 'o' shape as the realization hit them.

"How old are you," asked Rainbow getting a light scolding from her friends.

"I'm eighteen, anyway moving along, I idolized my big brother and wanted to be just like him, so I asked my mom to make me a chaos deus like him, after that, well not many notable things happened," said Anton.

"Nothing," asked the group in disbelief.

"Well, I practiced so that I'd be in control of my abilities, but yeah, nothing notable happened, I had a very boring life," said Anton with a dismissive shrug.

"What can you do exactly," asked Twilight "like, what are you fully capable of."

"Watch. And. Learn," said Anton before he snapped his figures.

With a flash a large, dark cloud appeared above Discord, Discord looked up only for a literal mountain of pink snow piled on top of him. Discord hastily pushed his way out of the snow, when he finally freed himself from his rosy tomb he noticed just how cold he was. Without warning Discord's body temperature jumped, causing him to sweat like a pig. Anton looked at his brother's misfortune with amusement.

"Greeting's, would you by any chance be Anton," asked an Ivory alicorn, of whom just appeared out of no where.

"Yes, you're princess Celestia right," asked Anton.

"That I am," said Celestia with a nod.

"How'd you know you'd find me here," asked Anton paranoid.

"I didn't, my trolling sense started tingling and something told me that it was Discord that was, finally, the butt of a joke," said Celestia with a sweet smile.

"You have a trolling sense," asked Anton curiously.

"Yep, I've developed it over the very very long period that is my life," said Celestia proudly.

Discord slid over to his brother and whispered "Translation: I'm really old and I've seen some shit."

"Thanks Captain Obvious," replied Anton with annoyed sarcasm.

"Didn't you hear Princess," asked Pinkie randomly.

"Hear what," asked Celestia perplexed by the pink psychopath's antics.

"Aliens are trying to take over the world by getting into everyponies head," said Pinkie placing her hooves on the sides of her head and spinning her eyes crazily.

"That's silly my little Po-," Celestia was interrupted by the sound of tin foil.

Looking to her left she saw Anton, Pinkie, and her little sister, Princess Luna, looking around frantically with pointed tin foil hats adorning their heads.

"W-what are you doing," asked Celestia completely baffled and confused.

"We're trying to keep out the mind destructive forces man, like, if they get in our head's we're all goners," replied Anton like a stereotypical paranoid alien conspiracy theorist.

Luna giggled holding a hoof to her mouth "I like him, he's funny."

"Luna dearest, why are you here," asked Celestia.

"Anton here contacted me and asked me if I wanted to help him with a small prank on you," said Luna with a sweet smile.

"How exactly did he contact you," asked Celestia raising a brow.

"Through the dream-network of course, it's the middle of the day so obviously I was sleeping, so he just contacted me in my dreams," replied Luna with a giggle.

"You can dream-walk... I can't even dream-walk," said Discord with a hint of jealousy in his voice.

"Very limited dream-walking, no where near Luna's level," said Anton eliciting a pridefully smug grin from Luna "the only reason I was able to enter her dream in the first place is because she let me in."

"You're just stroking her ego at this point," said Celestia with a small chortle.

"I'm very good at it," said Anton taking his tin foil hat off and turning it into a small bird and letting it fly free.

Pinkie clapped gleefully at the little show of pure chaos magic at work.

"ANOTHER! ANOTHER," hollered Pinkie gleefully.

"Okay, LADIES AND GENTLECOLTS, PLEASE FORM AN ORDERLY FASHIONED RING AROUND ME," announced Anton before he paused to wait for the ponies to comply.

"I must ask everypony present to never try this at home, or anywhere else for that matter," said Anton before he snapped his fingers using his chaos magic to exchange his clothes for a sleek black leotard with a flame design, Discord was put in the same outfit, much to his dismay.

"I'm sorry, let us introduce ourselves, I am the master of disaster, Retorta the Great, and this is my partner, Discord the Wicked," continued Anton dramatically announcing to the crowd.

While Anton continued on with his announcement, Pinkie and Luna sat on their haunches directly across from them, basically on the edge of their seats in suspense, eating copious amounts of popcorn. All the while, Anton had paused for a brief moment to let the crowd to ferment in their own suspense. When he decided he had teased them enough he snapped his fingers and out of a pink cloud to his left appeared a blue, star speckled box resting on eight wheeled legs. Next to it, standing upright on her back hooves in a black kimono with a pink flower pattern stood Fluttershy. Her flawless pink mane was woven and tied into a bun by a thin read ribbon, her eyelids were covered in pale blue shaded eye-shadow, finally her lips were painted crimson.

She looked around at the crowd, a flattered blush adorning her cheeks as a result of the complements and whistles she was receiving.

"I must ask everypony to remain perfectly silent," said Anton giving Fluttershy a hand as he helped her into the box.

Everypony gasped as Anton closed the box and locked it shut, with a twirl of his hand a large razor sharp saw appeared.

"Now everypony, I SHALL ATTEMPT TO SAW FLUTTERSHY IN HALF," announced Anton excitedly.

The crowd gasped, mares covered their mouths, and parent's covered their foals eyes, stallions sat back in anticipation.

Anton hovered the ax above the box and began cutting, within moments the saw had cut through the box and in a flurry of butterflies the box separated. Anton opened the box with a snap of his fingers, and magically levitated the two pieces of Fluttershy out of the box. To the shock of the crowd, both halves of Fluttershy were perfectly fine, and very much alive.

"TA-DA," yelled Anton snapping his finger's making everything return back to normal.

The crowd erupted into into applause, roses flying at the trio.

"I-I didn't even do anything," said Discord confusedly.

"Your job was to literally stand there and look pretty," whispered Anton.

"I hate you," growled Discord.

"Consider the misery I'm going to put you through as your punishment for locking me in a box for over eight thousand years," said Anton with a devious smile.

THE END................. For Now