The Cheese

by TheEveryDaySparkle

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Luna, Comedy, Random, Princess Celestia
Length: 1735

Luna asks her sister a question not even she has the answer to, despite her experience with it.

Luna wonders why the moon has craters in it. Celestia has her answer. And it will not be what she expected. At all. Stand Alone Sequel to Celestia's Computer

Published 2017-03-07 02:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-03-07 02:00:01 UTC

Sister, Why does the moon have craters?

Luna stared up at the night sky, admiring the moon as she prepared to drift off to sleep. The stars deserved her attention to, of course. But the princess of the night would always prefer her moon.

How beautiful and wondrous it was. She sighed as she stared at it from her bedroom window, high in the castle.

During her time there, while repenting for her crimes as nightmare moon, she had come to appreciate the moon even more. Its perch in the sky was breathtaking to look at, and its position there was also quite shady. Not to mention the many crystals she found there. Layer upon layer of the richest minerals known to ponykind were there to be observed. But there was one thing that always left her wondering.

Why did the moon looks so...broken?

Why did her beautiful moon, perfect in her eyes, have to looks so beaten? Vast amounts of cracks and craters lined the surface of her lovely moon. The mere thought of it made her so angry. But the question that ached to be answered, the question that sat at the back of her mind as she stared so intently at it, was why?

Why did her wondrous and incredible moon have to be like this? Was it a punishment? Had the moon, like her, done something so unforgivable, that it was forced to bear the weight of its sins? Or had it become like this when she was banished, as an added bonus to her already unbearable suffering.

No. Her sister wouldn't do that, would she? She knew how much she loved the moon! She had hapf a mind to go and ask her herself?

But then, she had a thought. What if the moon had always been like that. Or perhaps it became like that over thousands of years? That couldn't be the case, could it?

She had a headache by now. She had to know! She could ask her sister about it, couldn't she? But Celestia was not as much of a night owl as she was. She would probably yell at her for daring to disturb her sleep for something so trivial.

She decided that she had to know. If she didn't she wouldn't be able to sleep tonight. It was like an itch that couldn't be scratched. She had to know. It was worth any pain.

Some people believed that the Night Princess was nocturnal, like an owl, or a vampire fruit bat. But the truth was, that she, like her sister, slept at night. The only thing she did that kept her up was raise the moon.

And so, with the comforting thought of sleep raging in her mind, she left her room and trotted across the royal hall, to her sister's bedroom. She did so quietly, so as to not rouse her sister's anger so soon.

She unlocked the door and crept inside, careful not to make a single solitary sound. Her sister had learned a spell to lock her door, so as to protect herself at night when the guards could not. The only one she ever taught it to was Luna, therefore she was the only one who could unlock her door the same way.

When she made it to her sister's bedside, she tool a deep breath, exhaled slowly, and tapped her sister on the shoulder, shutting her eyes tight as she prepared for the tongue lashing of her life. What had she been thinking? How dare she wake her sister this late! She could've just saved this question for the morning time and asked her then. Now she was in trouble. She waited, and waited, and waited, but nothing happened.

Luna was shocked. She would've expected her sister to fling her across the room, or choke her with magic by now. But, there was nothing. No angry yelling, no magic noose, nothing. Luna opened a single eye, too afraid to open them both.

There she was. Celestia, was still fast asleep. She hadn't even turned over in her sleep.

Luna sighed in relief. She was safe. For now. But she still didn't know about the moon. She was going to try again.

With more determination, she tapped her sister's shoulder harder, shutting her eyes again just in case she was going to hurt her.

Then she heard it. She shuddered in fear as she heard her sister's voice. But they were not words of anger.

No. not at all. This was simple curiosity.

"What is it, Luna? It's late, you should be in bed."

Even still, even as the words left her mouth, she spoke in a way that showed slight annoyance at her sister's actions. And this scared Luna. Still she pressed on. Celestia was awake now. now was her chance.

"Sister, forgive me but I must ask. It has been bothering me all night. I cannot sleep."

Celestia put a hoof to her chin. What could be so important that it would keep her sister from sleeping? She usually slept like a log in the morning. Celestia decided to hear her out.

"Don't worry about it, Luna. Just tell me, so we can both get some rest." She gave her younger sister her signature smile.

Luna inwardly sighed. She had been a bundle of nerves until right then. Her sister's smile had wiped away all worry. But something told her that her next words were going to turn that smile upside down.

"Why does the moon have craters?"

She had been right. With the simple utterance of those words, Celestia's face went from the grand smile she loved so much, to a face of terrible anger.

Celestia couldn't believe this. Her sister had woke her up for this. She was princess of the night, for Faust's sake. Surely she knew about her own moon?

But then, an idea come to her head. "Luna, I know the answer to your question. The reason the moon has craters, is because it is made of cheese."

Luna had no choice. The answer she heard just now warranted at least this much. She stood up straight, shook off her fear, looked up at her sister, took a deep breath, and gave her sister the most appropriate answer she could mange.

"What?"

Celestia smiled. "It's true! How else would you explain the craters? Cheese has craters doesn't it?"

Luna thought about this for a moment. "I...suppose that's true. But what about the crystals and minerals I found there during my banishment?"

"Crumbs." Celestia said simply.

"And the color?"

"The moon has existed for thousands of years Luna. It's old."

"The hard texture?"

"What happens when food gets stale or old?"

Luna couldn't let that one slide. "How dare you talk about the moon like it's some kind of old junk from the trash! Take that back! It is beautiful."

Suddenly, Luna had another idea. "Yes, the moon, is beautiful. And spoiled things usually look horrid. They taste terrible as well. How do you explain that if the moon still looks as incredible as it did all those years ago"

Celestia had to ask. "Sister, just how do you know what the moon tastes like?"

"Do not judge me. I was starving up there."

Celestia chuckled.

"Hey, do not laugh at me!"

Celestia calmed down, and looked at her sister. She was so cute sometimes. "Sorry, Luna."

Luna simply huffed.

Celestia smiled again. "But, sister, there is one thing you have forgotten."

Luna looked at her sister with a look of curiosity. "And what is that?"

"There are different kinds of cheese. And the point you just made about taste applies the most to one in particular."

Luna was intrigued by this. "And what kind is that?"

"Limburger cheese. The more it ages. The tastier it becomes. It is only natural for the moon to remain beautiful, even after that long, if that is indeed the case."

Luna was shocked. Her sister was right! that made perfect sense. If the moon was indeed made of this "Limburger cheese" as she called it, It would only be natural for it to remain beautiful. She had made her decision.

The next day, Luna was not in the throne room with her sister. Worried for her safety, Celestia called the royal guard to see if they knew anything.

"Yes, Princess Celestia." Came the voice of none other than the Captain of the Guard himself, Shining Armor.

"Shining, please, tell me. How is my sister? Is she not feeling alright? She did not come to the throne room today." Celestia said in a worried tone.

Shining took off his helmet, holding it against his chest. Sweat lined his forehead as he said in a nervous tone, "Ahahaha...About that..."

"Yes, shining?" Came Celestia's honey sweet voice as she tried to calm him down.

"She said something to me this morning about a...Limburger Moon?"

Celestia's eyes widened in realization. "Oh no! Take me to her at once!"

Shining did as he was told and led the princess to her sister's chambers.

Celestia opened the door slowly, and stepped in.

Laid out on her bed,moaning and groaning and clutching her stomach, was Luna.

Celestia looked on at the scene she had caused, her eyes downcast in sorrow. But, even as she wallowed in regret of her actions, she let out a small chuckle.

A chuckle, which Luna heard.

"SISTER!" Luna roared at her sister, pure rage radiating off of every part of her body. He mane even changed color. To a deep, blood, red.

Celesita couldn't help it. She burst into a laughing fit so intense, it brought tears to her eyes.

"HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME!" Came Luna's roaring voice again. The Canterlot Voice was terrifying. The royal guards who had come to see her on Shining's order were pretty sure they were deaf by now, including Shining himself

Luna rolled over onto her side and cried as Celestia came down from her laughing fit and went to her bedside, placing a hoof on her tummy.

"I hate you for this sister..." Luna said with a shaking voice. Her tears flowed freely from her eyes, unable to be stopped manually.

"I know, Luna. I know. Forgive me, but, what exactly did you do?" Celestia said, still stroking her sister's tummy.

"It was the cheese." was all she said.