It was late in the evening and Twilight was just settling down to relax. She picked up the romance novel Rarity had loaned her and started to read. She sighed, knowing she had a lot of work to do, but she had been ordered, nicely, by her friend to relax at least an hour every day and get a good nights sleep. “Good for your mental health” he said. She had to reluctantly agree there was something to what he said. She had been finding herself much more productive for the last few days when compared to when she tried working around the clock.
Twilight had finally gotten comfortable when there was a single loud bang, like somepony had bucked the Library door. She sighed and trudged down the stairs, half expecting a prank. Unsurprisingly there was nopony there, but there was something much more exciting. A pile of twelve thick volumes were piled in front of the door. She picked up the first book titled ‘The Human : Observations and Speculations : Volume I - Overview’.
Twilight excitedly levitated the books to her reading spot, not noticing the small notebook falling to the floor. Spike picked it up, “Hey, Twilight, what about-”
Twilight, irritated, “Not now Spike. This may be the key to saving Alex. I have a lot of reading to do.”
Spike shrugged and started reading the smooth script.
The first few sentences were scratched out, as if the writer was unsatisfied with them.
~~I would like to thank Mr Golden Coins for his generous funding of this project.~~
~~Mr Golden Coins was the generous provider of the funds for this historic project.~~
~~Thanks for the dough Goldie!~~
-Note to self, find a better opening line-
The following is a summary of my findings, observations, discoveries, and opinions on the human known as Alex Roberts. It also includes my theories on sentient beings with non-magic manipulative organs and intense tool use. For a more detailed and exhaustive examination of the raw data, please see the accompanying twelve volume book set, “The Human : Observations and Speculations” by me, Lyra Heartstrings. The subjects covered are:
Volume I : Overview
Volume II : Anatomy
Volume III : Internal Structure
Volume IV : Biochemical Composition
Volume V : The Hands (Part I)
Volume VI : The Hands (Part II)
Volume VII : The Senses
Volume VIII : Current Social Interactions Including Family
Volume IX : Speculations on Social Interactions
Volume X : Observations and speculations on magic use
Volume XI : Observed Technology Use
Volume XII : Speculations on Technology Use
Less than a season ago, approximately six months, two weeks, and fourteen and a half days, a transdimensional portal appeared for approximately 0.0476 seconds, bridging our universe and the next into contact. This allowed the human, known as Alex Roberts, to translocate a sphere of matter, including himself, approximately 2.67 meters in radius, centered in his upper chest.
He materialized in the lightly wooded parcel of land owned by Miss Fluttershy, one of the renowned Elements of Harmony, a past fashion model, and naturalist. In an amazing coincidence and stroke of luck I was taking a walk in the area, looking for evidence of dragon fairies, when I saw the flash of light that heralded his arrival. I wisely remained hidden and simply observed this exciting new phenomenon.
When I first observed him he was in a freshly materialized field of snow. I even felt a gust of icy air, presumably carried with him. Everything in that field, as well as everything about him and what he carried with him, seemed impossibly complex. Even the “simple” tree branches, of which I managed to acquire several, were more richly detailed and complex than any branch native to Equestria.
At first I considered approaching him, offering a hoof in friendship, but was interrupted by Fluttershy. Known for her explosive anger issues, I decided to remain hidden. In retrospect, this has allowed me to observe him without influencing him directly.
The script started getting messier, and Spike was starting to have problem reading it.
Apparently, his vision was impaired by the “ju_p”, as he calls the transdImensional shift, but after a sh_rt time he seemed to regain a satisfactory amo_nt of visual ability. It would seEm all his senses were similarly affected. Interestingly, they did not simply return to pony stan_ard senses (see the seminal work on pony senses ‘I see you!’ by Bio Beaker for details on the full range of normal pony s_nses) but continued to improve to the poInt where they are all currently far superior to pony senses.
On the subject of senses, he seems surpri_ed at the level of raw abilities. In fact, from what I _ave been able to deterMine, they are currently far superior to what he had in the past. I theorize our ambient magical environment is somehow enhaNcing his natural characteristics, in the same w_y a pegasus stores that magic to enhance their natural fligh_ abilities. I think the natural ability of a human is their sharp senses and, by ponY standards, quick adaptability. Evidence poJnts to both of the_e being noticeably heightened when compared to ponies.
Anyway, b_ck to the events at hand. Once Alex and Fluttershy were out of the way, I collected a black tissue sa_ple I found on the edge of the snow field. I’ve come to realize it waS the tip of the nose of a dog or dog like creature. Ho_ever, I must co_fess, as much as I try to focus on the task at hoof, I find myself drawn to his amazing hands, slowly clutching in the snow wHen he first arrived. The possibilities were end_ess.
The writing was getting progressively worse. Spike mused it was getting very much like Twilight’s writing when she was having her manic episodes.
Since his arr_val he has been working very hard to integrate _imself into our society. He has rented a home an_ had acquired a vast fortune thanKs to large quan_ities of alumiNum. I was able to surreptitiously ac_ire one of the coins, specifically a coin with a strange squid he_ded creature pictured on it. He has gone to g__at lengths to gain acceptance from the community, always acting in humble, Deferential, almost submi_sive ways.
In fact, __ has gone so far as to _hrow himself into dangerous situations, specifically saving T_ee Trimmer from a burning buil_ing and protecting Scoota__ from a perceived attack by golden Coins. _suspect he has suffered from great psychological dama_e, almost to the point where he now exhibits self destructi_e behaviors.
While he was no_ specifically __eking out a mate he seems to have attracted multiple potential female mates. __ last count, R_inbow Dash, Rar_y, Applejack, and pos_ly TWilight Sparkle, four of the six the Famed __ments of H__ony, were all pursuing him to v__ying degrees, although he has recently seems to have selected Ra_nbow Dash.
I find mysElf feeling som_hat disturbed as I did not have an opportunity to be selected. I fee_ould have been a s_perior choice, with my true appreciation of humans and their hands. While it wouLd be unethical to _tively pursue my favorite test subject, I may tr_ some indirect tactics, ethical considerations be d__ned.
Based on his increa_d interaction, and overheard conversations at his house, I suspect he is trying to build a pony family with that ___. This has infuriated me, as I never gave him permis_ion and it will skew the results of my obse_ations.
Strangely, the next few paragraphs were clearly written, except for the occasional scratched out word.
I personally am feeling ambivalent about Alex. On the one hoof, he is an alien, and could be the vanguard to an invasion. On the other, he seems so kind and loving. I wonder what those hands would feel like on my back or f_____. Purely for science, of course.
I continue to find his hands to be fascinating, almost mesmerizing. Below is a drawing I made.
So beautiful, so interesting, so capable of fine string plucking operations. Unlike the clawed hands of young dragons or minators, human hands are much softer, capable of more gentle and subtle actions.
The ana---
To Spike’s annoyance, the writing once again becomes hurried, messy.
Great News! I have rel_able informAtion that he will be going to Canterlot with Twilight Sparkle and his loutish n_g Rainbow Dash in two daYs.
I have devised a brilliant p_n to have my first p_ysical contact with him. If all goes well, I will even be able to achieve _rolonged physical contact. I hope Bon-Bon isn’t upset by _h__. I know she gets bored of me talking about him.
Once again,much to Spikes relief, the writing becomes clear. The pages are stained with water marks. Spike suspects they are tears.
Last night, I had the most, intim- interesting, dream. He was holding his hands out for me to admire. I nuzzled them, oh how I nuzzled them. He finally put them on my cheeks, so lovingly, the way he does with the nag.
I could hear his voice, deep and smooth, and warm, say to me, “I was a fool. I don’t understand what I saw in that multi-colored lout, and now I only see you. You are my everything, I want to give you the only things I have that are worthy of you. Now, lift your left hoof.”
He removed his left hand, no muss, no fuss, and attached it to my left hoof. “Now give me your right hoof.” He presented his right hand, and I knew I only had to take it, and attaching it to my hoof. I did, no pain, no problems. “Now, all that matters about me, is yours.” I stood on my hind, now only, legs. I ran my hands down my sides and felt my coat. I could feel with the fingers. So different than feeling with your hoof. So much more delicate, more perfect. I picked up my lyre, and played music so beautiful and heartbreaking, I could not even remember it. I woke up crying, for me, for my missing hands, for Alex, for having hooves, for losing that perfect music, for betraying Bon-Bon. Like always, she was there to comfort me. I don’t deserve her. I wish I was good enough for her, good enough to give her the music she deserves.
Well, never mind that. Today is the day I get close to Alex! Bon-Bon wished me luck while I was leaving. I don’t exactly understand why.
Like before, the writing gets progressively worse, grating on Spike to no end.
I fin_lly made contact with Alex. His hands touched the sides of my chest and I could feel the individual fingers brushing Along my sid_s as he fell. They were so strange, soft yet firm, almost like the soft fr_g under our hooves, but all around and exten_ed. The detail of his skin waS simply fascinating. Oh, I wish I could hold his hAnds in my ho_ves, or better yet, have him hold my hooves in his hands.
I even saw his tEEth, and my susp_ons are confirmed, he's an omnivore. I wonder if he's eaten any meat while here _ Equestria. Someone I knoW, maybe? I'll have to lo_k into cow, sheep, pig, and, Celest_a forbid, pon_ disappearances.
He was worried he would g_t hurt on my horn, but I was ready to deflect him. He got that little sCratch, but if anythinG humans are so much more resilient than ponies. Still, that nag of his saved him before I could get a proper blood sample. She is so clingy. I've heard she's like that wit_ all her sPecial friends and they all run away from her. With a little luck, and some creative help, I may be able to drive Rainbow Dash away from him, i_o my hooves. S_e doesn't deserve a creature as mag_ificent As him. He's kind, br_ve, gentle, all the things a lover should be.
The next two lines were perfectly neat and tidy.
I wish Bon-Bon would take a few pointers from him.
Note to self: write less messy notes
Spike looked at the little notebook, “Meh, nothing important here. Just some pony making messy notes.” And with this final decision, he tossed it into the trash.
